Tucker Carlson got hopping mad on the most recent episode of his Fox News show. Yes, he gets fired up on a regular basis (like about Elmo from Sesame Street), but this time, he acted even more dramatic. Carlson claimed that he would have had a hand in some “October surprise” involving an unverified conspiracy about emails from a laptop that allegedly belongs to Hunter Biden (who has been the subject of wild Rudy Guiliani rantings). However, Carlson claimed that the smoking gun could only be found in a missing package that had mysteriously evaporated.
Carlson then suggested he might have been spied upon as part of a deep-state conspiracy to hide “damning” details about Hunter Biden and China and security issues. The host appeared to believe that these “confidential documents” were the key to toppling Biden’s election chances, but of course, Carlson did not provide any information on these documents that he believes were deliberately lost as part of a dastardly plot. Nor does anyone know why there weren’t backup copies if these documents were so important, but now, a twist has arrived. Via the Daily Beast, UPS has revealed that the package has been located:
“After an extensive search, we have found the contents of the package and are arranging for its return. UPS will always focus first on our customers, and will never stop working to solve issues and make things right.”
This runs counter to Carlson’s claim that an exhausted search had already been conducted with the conclusion that the package was missing forever. Fox News had also published a report about how “the package had been opened and arrived empty” at a sorting facility. But now, the package lives?
Who really knows where this story goes from here. One thing is certain, though: the “package” jokes are coming fast and furious.
Contrary to some reports the box was not empty, it contained several of Rudy Giuliani’s briefs.
— RFG (@factsdujour) October 29, 2020
It’s going to be full of panda porn, isn’t it…. pic.twitter.com/UA9uPfabTU
— Noble Prize in Sarcasm (@rewegreatyet) October 29, 2020
I had it pic.twitter.com/8MLqitDNb3
— DSFB (@gregminnick_) October 29, 2020
Tucker’s package is just really hard to see.
— DigistTrimp (@DivestTrump) October 29, 2020
Ahhhh so now we see how much damage these secret damning documents from hell are going to cause Hunter Biden in his candidacy for president. It’s about time!
— Jason S. (@jaydotcom) October 29, 2020
Tucker Carlson’s fedex package is the new Geraldo Al Capone’s Vault.
— Steve Redmond (@sjredmond) October 29, 2020
BREAKING: Exclusive photos of Tucker Carlson’s package. Wait. Lemme rephrase that… pic.twitter.com/7mzai1sHVu
— Proud to not be a super spreader
(@kingcutnyc) October 29, 2020
Is it November 3 yet?