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Tyrese Maxey Already Loves The Process As The Newest Member Of The Sixers

Tyrese Maxey’s tone and body language have just perked up.

Finally, someone asks him about the shirt he’s wearing, the one that invites the simplest of parallels to the Philadelphia 76ers, the franchise that, one day earlier, selected him 21st overall in the 2020 NBA Draft. He’s excited to tell people the origin of his shirt, which everyone in the virtual room notices but has yet to act upon or inquire about.

“It’s so funny, because, like, my uncle, when I was in high school, he gave me this shirt. Not this exact shirt, but he gave me a shirt that said, ‘Fall in love with the process,’” Maxey says on a Wednesday morning Zoom call with media. “It kinda just stuck with me because, like, the way I work, and, like, getting up at 6 a.m. and doing those different things like that. I wore it yesterday when I worked out at 6 a.m. or 7 a.m. and I posted it, and then, I got drafted to Philadelphia and I just seen it everywhere. I’m like, ‘Wow, OK.’ I had another one and it was blue, too, so might as well wear this.”

Of course, The Process, in Sixers vernacular, denotes the Sam Hinkie Era of Sixers basketball, when the team stockpiled assets, and laid the foundation to acquire stars, whether that be through the draft — Joel Embiid and Ben Simmons — or via trade — Jimmy Butler — and invigorated a stagnant organization. That time period and means of leadership ended years ago, but with Hinkie’s former boss, Daryl Morey, now running the show as President of Basketball Operations, there is a renewed sense of optimism and hope, derived partly from Maxey’s arrival.

In Maxey, the Sixers holster someone with off-the-dribble creation, a rare presence, aside from Jimmy Butler’s abbreviated tenure, throughout Embiid and Simmons’ time together. Simmons’ shortcomings as a scorer are well-explained and the downside to running an offense almost solely through a low-post big man was illuminated during the Sixers’ first-round loss to the Boston Celtics last season, when ball-handlers made entry passes look entirely foreign and complex during critical junctures.

Philadelphia took a step toward alleviating that concern Wednesday. Expecting a rookie to eradicate this deficiency cannot be the threshold, especially for a team eyeing title contention. But given the Sixers’ previous missteps in roster-building, the acquisition of Maxey is about as good as it gets for them. He was the best player available and fills a glaring need.

“It feels like a great, amazing situation for myself. I was talking to my parents about it,” Maxey says. “I feel like I can go in and make an immediate impact on a contending team, a competitive team.”

The infrastructure of Embiid and Simmons already established as the offensive cornerstone likely prevents Maxey from being burdened to a stratum he cannot excel. Ideally, the Sixers roster a bonafide half-court initiator for Maxey to work alongside, but the Sixers operated far from team-building ideals for so long that they must take what they can at this point.

Maxey’s underwhelming collegiate production dampened his Draft stock, but recognizing and fleshing out context is vital to recognizing why many people still considered him a lottery-caliber prospect. After orchestrating offense as a primary initiator in high school and AAU ball, John Calipari asked him to take on a secondary handling and off-ball role. Kentucky’s spacing inhibited some of his driving prowess, though he still displayed the requisite package to believe in his slashing game. The objective, for both himself and the Sixers, is that his time spent exploring new offensive requirements as a Wildcat empower him to blend this on- and off-ball aptitude, filling a void on the perimeter for Philadelphia.

“I really appreciate the circumstance I was in at University of Kentucky because now, I feel like it fit in the new-age NBA, with guys like Jamal Murray, C.J. McCollum, even Damian Lillard, Jrue Holiday, different guys like that, who have to play on and off the ball,” Maxey says. “Now, it’s just another asset to my game where I can play on the ball if I have to and, when guys like Joel and Ben are in the game, I can play off the ball and find ways to help the team like that.”

Despite shooting 29.2 percent beyond the arc, he should emerge as a rather effective floor-spacer, merging spot-up and off-movement capability, as well as a bit of pull-up equity. He shot 83.3 percent from the free-throw line and exhibited deft touch on floaters. His pre-collegiate shooting sample is highly encouraging, too. During his junior and senior EYBL seasons, he shot 62.5 percent on twos (861 attempts), 83.1 percent at the line (532 attempts), and 33.7 percent from deep (602 attempts).

Silencing the narrative that he cannot shoot helped shape Maxey’s pre-Draft training habits. He staunchly believes he is a better shooter than his collegiate numbers convey and is determined to follow through on this credence. Every day, he arrives at the gym for a 6 a.m. training session with a goal to net 750-800 shots. After a weightlifting workout, he returns at 10 a.m. to achieve that same goal. Sometimes, he’ll head back later for a third try, too.

“I’ve been working on it all. Catch-and-shoot off of different actions, off the dribble,” Maxey says. “You have to have all that in today’s game and I feel like if you can’t be able to knock down shots from everywhere on the court, wide open threes, especially now playing with a guy like Ben Simmons and Joel Embiid, who cause a lot of attention, it’s gonna be hard to get on the floor.

“My thing is to set my own records, so, like, I’m trying to make consecutive shots in a row so you can see that consistency build up,” he continues. “Making 20 one day, making 25 the next day. As high as I am right now is 36. Keep building, keep building to where you have that confidence to where I have it now, where I feel like if I’m open, I’m gonna knock it down. I have no doubt in my mind that it’s gonna go in.”

With the Sixers, he will not be overextended as a passer, helping to mask some of his playmaking flaws. Asking him to navigate the occasional pick-and-roll (86th percentile in efficiency last season) is well within his bounds. He has strength, burst, intermediate craft, and sets up ball-screens intuitively. His understanding of the opportunities surely bestowed upon him working off the attention created by Embiid and Simmons pairs well with his slashing knack, augmented by strength, balance, coordination, and flexibility.

He ranked in the 47th percentile at the basket last season (relatively good for a freshman guard), where 28.6 percent of his shots occurred, bringing a level of rim pressure and standstill creation this roster will gladly welcome and benefit from. A backcourt player brandishing the shooting credentials to force defensive respect, while also having the horizontal explosiveness and finishing acumen to work off the bounce, is vital for Philadelphia’s half-court offense. Embiid’s post gravity is the best in the league, and Simmons can collapse defenses, too. The issue, for years, has been lacking anyone to consistently capitalize on the advantages this star duo yields. Maxey can, and in a variety of facets.

“Off instincts, being able to use my speed, use my pace, use my different creative finishes at the rim,” he says. “I realized that I was gonna be about 6’3, 6’4, around that range, my senior year in high school, so I figured out ways, not always get all the way to the rim, but still getting to the rim using floater packages, different finishes practices, being creative.”

Maxey will not manifest all of these traits from the outset. The Sixers are not instantly back among the league’s foremost title contenders, despite a significantly rosier short- and long-term vision due to a strong Draft and the ability to move Al Horford on Wednesday evening. Maxey spoke candidly in a manner that suggests he is fully cognizant of how he can immediately apply his strengths to complement Embiid and Simmons (and the entire team), yet also with an underlying sense of accountability that he must continue to improve to deliver on the intrigue surrounding him. All of it is part of his process, the perpetual grind with which he fell in love many years ago as a teenager eyeing lofty hoop dreams.

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Curtis Roach Is No Longer ‘Bored In The House’ In His Earthy ‘Bamboo Lounge’ Video

After being “bored in the house” for the duration of the quarantine, Detroit rapper Curtis Roach hits the “Bamboo Lounge” in his latest music video — which incidentally arrives just as the nation prepares for another extended lockdown to curb the increase in coronavirus cases. The “Bamboo Lounge” video finds Curtis wandering the deserted streets of Detroit — and visiting an animated bamboo copse — to reflect on his interesting reversal of fortune: “I was down upon my luck and now I’m golden,” he exults as he dances to the tropical-sounding beat.

The relentlessly upbeat Roach talked to Uproxx in April about the insane viral popularity of his “bored in the house” TikTok sound and how it became the basis of a hit record with Tyga. “I made that before the self-quarantine,” he admitted. “I didn’t know that that was about to happen.” However, the sound and the song based on it quickly became moment-defining soundtracks to this summer’s lockdown, which had Americans bingeing Tiger King, baking bread, and finding whatever means possible to keep their minds and bodies occupied and spirits lifted. “That was crazy for me,” Roach noted. “Every time, when I go on Twitter, it’s a new video of a whole family in quarantine that’s just ‘Bored In The House.’ That’s just the coolest part about it, we all are feeling this right now… We’re all connected through this.”

Watch the “Bamboo Lounge” video above.

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Here’s Everything New On Hulu For December 2020

Hulu wraps up this spectacularly bad year by giving us a handful of really good shows and movies to binge. A Hardy Boys reboot and another season of Letterkenny arrives for TV fans while the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy lands for moviegoers who can’t hit the theater. Here’s everything coming to (and leaving) Hulu this month.

The Hardy Boys (Hulu original series streaming 12/4)

Hulu takes a stab at rebooting this beloved detective book series this month, recruiting some fresh faces to play the titular duo. Frank Hardy (Rohan Campbell) and his brother Joe (Alexander Elliot) are forced to move from the city to their parents’ hometown over the summer after tragedy strikes. The pair’s quiet summer is interrupted when they stumble upon some evidence that might be key to their dad’s (also a detective) secret investigation.

Letterkenny: Season 9 (Hulu series streaming 12/26)

This season picks up post-fight as the Hicks, Skids, and Hockey Players attend something called an “American Buck and Doe.” While the Hockey Team learns about Judaism and Katy goes full-scorched Earth on the town’s dating scene, everyone else really gets into some weird sleepover activities.

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (streaming 12/1)

Peter Jackson gave fantasy fans a stunning adaptation of J. R. R. Tolkien’s epic book series, which deserves to be watched in chronological order, hence why we can’t pick just one film to shout out here. The main story follows Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood), a young hobbit faced with an impossible burden: to destroy the ring of Sauron, a Dark Lord with plans to destroy Middle Earth. He’s joined on his journey by wizards and elves and dwarves along the way as each faction fights their own battle against Sauron’s massive army.

Avail. 12/1
CMA Country Christmas: Special (ABC)
Disney Holiday Singalong: Special (ABC)
Lupin the 3rd Part 5: Complete Season 1
30 Days of Night (2007)
50 First Dates (2004)
About Last Night (1986)
Angels & Demons (2009)
Any Given Sunday (1999)
Black Dynamite (2009)
Body of Evidence (1993)
Cake (2006)
Charlotte’s Web (1973)
Cliffhanger (1993)
Con Air (1997)
Diary Of A Mad Black Woman (2005)
Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist (2005)
Dr. No (1962)
Dragonball: Evolution (2009)
Euphoria (2018)
Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties (2006)
Goldeneye (1995)
Goldfinger (1964)
Hemingway’s Garden of Eden (2010)
Here On Earth (1999)
Hot Air (2018)
Into the Blue (2005)
Love Potion No. 9 (1992)
Our Family Wedding (2009)
Sands of Iwo Jima (1950)
Shrink (2009)
Sleeping with the Enemy (1991)
Southside With You (2016)
Strategic Air Command (1955)
Sunshine (2007)
The 6th Day (2000)
The Chumscrubber (2005)
The Client (1994)
The Color of Money (1986)
The Da Vinci Code (2006)
The Fifth Element (1997)
The Hand that Rocks the Cradle (1992)
The Hulk (2003)
The Hurt Locker (2008)
The January Man (1989)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring (2001)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King (2003)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor (2008)
The November Man (2014)
The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
The Young Victoria (2009)
True Confessions (1981)
Two Weeks (2006)
Under the Tuscan Sun (2003)
Why Did I Get Married? (2007)

Avail. 12/4
The Hardy Boys: Complete Season 1 (Hulu Original)
Brassic: Complete Season 2
Deutschland 89: Complete Season 1
My Hero Academia: Complete Season 4
She Dies Tomorrow (2020)

Avail. 12/5
Black Ops (2020)
God’s Own Country (2017)
It Had To Be You (2015)
Mr. Jones (2020)
Waiting For The Barbarians (2020)

Avail. 12/6
How To Fake A War (2019)
The Secret Garden (2020)

Avail. 12/7
Valley Girl (2020)

Avail. 12/8
The Fairy Princess and the Unicorn (2020)

Avail. 12/10
Dr. Seuss’ The Grinch Musical!: Special (NBC)
Out Stealing Horses (2019)

Avail. 12/11
Madagascar: A Little Wild: Complete Season 2 (Hulu Original)
Rent-A-Pal (2020)
Spy Cat (2020)

Avail. 12/12
Endless (2020)

Avail. 12/15
Dirt Music (2019)
Hitman: Agent 47 (2015)

Avail. 12/16
Amy Winehouse: A Final Goodbye (2016)

Avail. 12/18
The Hero (2017)

Avail. 12/21
NOS4A2: Complete Season 2

Avail. 12/22
You Cannot Kill David Arquette (2020)

Avail. 12/23
Someone Marry Barry (2014)
The Little Hours (2017)

Avail. 12/25
Soldiers of Fortune (2012)

Avail. 12/26
Letterkenny: Complete Season 9 (Hulu Original)

Avail. 12/27
American Animals (2018)

Avail. 12/28
Hope Gap (2020)
Our Idiot Brother (2011)

Avail. 12/31
Bayou Caviar (2018)
Supervized (2019)

Leaving 12/8
The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let’s Do The Time Warp Again (2016)

Leaving 12/14
Baby…Secret Of The Lost Legend (1985)

Leaving 12/16
The Good Shepherd (2006)

Leaving 12/31
30 Days of Night (2007)
A Beautiful Mind (2001)
A Nanny For Christmas (2010)
A View to a Kill (1985)
About Last Night (1986)
Aeon Flux (2005)
Alien Nation (1988)
Anti-Trust (2001)
Antwone Fisher (2002)
Any Given Sunday (1999)
Back to School (1986)
Barbershop (2002)
Black Dynamite (2009)
Blood Ties (2014)
Broadcast News (1987)
Cliffhanger (1993)
Crimson Tide (1995)
Diamonds Are Forever (1971)
Diary Of A Mad Black Woman (2005)
Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist (2005)
Dr. No (1962)
Drugstore Cowboy (1989)
Flashback (1990)
For Your Eyes Only (1981)
From Russia with Love (1964)
Goldeneye (1995)
Goldfinger (1964)
Good Hair (2009)
Grizzly Man (2005)
House Of 1000 Corpses (2003)
I Spy (2002)
Ice Age: The Meltdown (2006)
Interview With the Vampire (1994)
Into the Blue (2005)
Joe (2014)
Justin Bieber: Never Say Never (2011)
Kicking & Screaming (2005)
Kiss The Girls (1997)
Knocked Up (2007)
Licence to Kill (1989)
Little Giants (1994)
Live and Let Die (1973)
Lord Of War (2005)
Lost In Space (1998)
Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome (1985)
March of the Penguins (2005)
Moonraker (1979)
Mr. Majestyk (1974)
Mud (2013)
My Bloody Valentine (1981)
Not Another Teen Movie (2001)
Nurse 3D (2014)
Octopussy (1983)
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)
Pacific Heights (1990)
Platoon (1986)
Raging Bull (1980)
Ronin (1998)
Senorita Justice (2004)
Sleeping with the Enemy (1991)
Slow Burn (2007)
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982)
Star Trek III: The Search for Spock (1984)
Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989)
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991)
Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)
Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979)
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street (2007)
Thanks for Sharing (2013)
The 6th Day (2000)
The Bourne Identity (2002)
The Bourne Supremacy (2004)
The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)
The Client (1994)
The Color of Money (1986)
The Do-Deca-Pentathlon (2011)
The End of Violence (1997)
The Express (2008)
The Hand that Rocks the Cradle (1992)
The Hulk (2003)
The Kingdom Of Heaven (2005)
The Living Daylights (1987)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring (2001)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King (2003)
The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)
The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor (2008)
The Net (1995)
The Saint (1997)
The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
The Weather Man (2005)
The World is Not Enough (1999)
The Young Victoria (2009)
This Christmas (2007)
Thunderball (1965)
Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)
Under the Tuscan Sun (2003)
Wanted (2008)
Why Did I Get Married? (2007)
Wild Hogs (2007)
Wild Things (1998)
William Shakespeare’s Romeo + Juliet (1996)
Working Girl (1988)
You Only Live Twice (1967)

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Someone On The Trump Social Team Apparently Left Their Audio On During a YouTube Stream, And It Caught Him Mocking Rudy’s Melting Hair Dye

After the embarrassing debacle at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, you’d just assume there’s no way that Rudy Giuliani can top delivering a press conference while standing next to a crematorium and a sex shop. But he sure gave it his best effort on Thursday when his hair dye started streaking down his face as he launched into another rambling attempt to prove that Donald Trump is the actual winner of the 2020 election. (He’s not.) To add insult to injury, journalist Oliver Willis apparently caught someone from the president’s social media team mocking Giuliani after accidentally leaving their audio on during a livestream on the president’s official YouTube channel.

In the clip Willis shared on Twitter, you can hear two voices laughing as one of them says, “Did you see f*cking Rudy’s hair dye dripping down his face?” and it’s clear as day.

After the press conference ended, the livestream was quickly pulled from Trump’s YouTube channel, but others chimed into Willis’ replies to let them know they caught the embarrassing moment, too.

On top of the dripping hair dye, which has already launched an avalanche of jokes on social media, Giuliani is also getting roasted for attempting to do a Joe Pesci impression while making a random My Cousin Vinny reference during the press conference. With legal maneuvers like this, it’s no wonder that Rudy is reportedly getting paid $20,000 per day by the president’s campaign. The guy knows how to get results if the results you’re looking for are a never-ending parade of humiliating viral clips. He’s clearly a master at it.

(Via Oliver Willis on Twitter)

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Fans Can Now Own Each Member Of Gorillaz With Their New Line Of Plastic Toys

2020 has been a wildly prolific year for virtual virtuosos Gorillaz. Not only did the group tap some big-name musicians like Elton John, Slowthai, and Beck to join them on their recent LP Song Machine: Season One — Strange Timez, but Damon Albarn recently revealed they are working on a scripted Gorillaz movie. And that’s not all: Gorillaz teamed up with company Superplastic (the same folks behind the Rico Nasty figure) to create an exclusive set of vinyl toys just in time for the holidays.

Each member of the band — 2-D, Murdoc Niccals, Noodle, and Russel Hobbs — is immortalized through the vinyl figures thanks to the toy creators Superplastic. This isn’t the group’s first time working with Superplastic, however. Way back in 2005, they launched a similar line of Gorillaz toys, but the group decided it was time for a modern upgrade.

In a statement about his toy, Murdoc Niccals said, “As someone who’s had dozens of statues made of himself, it takes a lot to impress me, but the workmanship on this figurine is really top notch. The perfect centrepiece for your Gorillaz shrine or shelf.”

Superplastic founder Paul Budnitz echoed Murdoc’s statement by expressing his excitement about the new products: “After more than 15 years creating vinyl toys with the Gorillaz, I’m super excited to be releasing the first full set of Gorillaz toys in 10 years. As the world’s premiere boutique creator of art toys, Superplastic only works with a handful of the world’s top artists. Jamie Hewlett is a genius and his twisted universe is a massive inspiration for me, Janky and Guggimon, and everyone at Superplastic.”

Check out some photos of the Gorillaz toys above and pre-order them here.

Song Machine: Season One — Strange Timez is out now via Parlophone. Get it here.

Gorillaz are a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an in independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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DaniLeigh Tears Down A Swaggering ‘Monique’ Performance For ‘UPROXX Sessions’

Fresh off the release of her new album Movie, DaniLeigh pops up at Uproxx Studios to perform the Retro Future-produced single “Monique.” The Miami-born, Dominican-American singer first blew up in 2018 with her hit single “Lil Bebe” after an extensive period as Prince’s protege, directing his video for “Breakfast Can Wait” and writing her own music, including the 2017 Summer With Friends EP.

After becoming one of the social stars that took the DoTheShiggy challenge viral by dancing to Drake’s “In My Feelings” next to her car, DaniLeigh dropped “Lil Bebe” and watched her profile skyrocket, culminating in the 2018 album The Plan which released late that year on Def Jam. The album featured appearances from Lil Yachty, YBN Nahmir, and YG and displayed her polished ability to slide back and forth between a chatterbox, Migos-influenced rap flow, and smooth R&B vocals.

That’s the very same approach she applies on “Monique,” rattling off braggadocios rhymes, boasting, “You cannot hear me ’cause I’m out of reach / All type of designer is packed in my brief.” With swaggering confidence and unaffected charisma, DaniLeigh proves to be the best of both worlds.

UPROXX Sessions is Uproxx’s performance show featuring the hottest up-and-coming acts you should keep an eye on. Featuring creative direction from LA promotion collective, Ham On Everything, and taking place on our “bathroom” set designed and painted by Julian Gross, UPROXX Sessions is a showcase of some of our favorite performers, who just might soon be yours, too..

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Michigan GOP canvassing board members ridiculously flip-flop—again—on vote count certification

On Tuesday night, the Wayne County, Michigan Board of Canvassers gave half the country a minor heart attack when it appeared that the four board members were deadlocked on certifying the vote count. Wayne County is home to Detroit, the largest city in the state and the city with the highest percentage of Black voters in the country. Delaying the certification for a county that handed Biden tens of thousands of votes over Trump would disrupt the entire electoral process—which is exactly what Trump is trying to do.

The Board of Canvassers, who are in charge of certifying the vote count for the county, was split 2-2 along party lines (such a shocker) with the Democrats for and the Republicans against certifying the vote count right up until the final hours before the deadline. The two Republican members, after hearing passionate commentary from the public, changed course and voted in the final hour to move forward with certification. The vote for Wayne County has officially been certified and sent to the secretary of state.

However, in another not-shocking development, however, both of the Republican board members have released signed documents saying that they wish to rescind their agreement to certify. This comes after GOP board member Monica Palmer received a phone call from President Trump.


According to the Washington Post, Palmer claims that the president called to ask her about her safety in the wake of alleged harassment she had received. Surely that’s 100% why he was calling and not at all to try to convince her that she shouldn’t have certified the vote count. Surely him talking about her safety was not any kind of a veiled mafioso-like threat—that would be as insane as insisting you won an election that you clearly lost and making up crazy global conspiracy theories in an attempt to cling to the power you so desperately crave. And surely he wasn’t trying to pressure her into rescinding her vote—that would be as corrupt as attempting to delay the certifications in swing states, push the elector decisions to GOP-led legislatures, create a chaotic picture of widespread fraud, and get the Supreme Court to wipe out the election results and rule in your favor because you think picking three judges and having a conservative majority means that they will automatically crown you the victor.

The whole no-yes-no flip-flopping is a rather pathetic display of partisan ugliness and Trump sycophancy to any objective observer, but of course that’s not how Palmer is portraying it. She insists that there was no pressure from the president—as if a phone call itself from the country’s highest office who also happens to be a candidate in the race she’s certifying isn’t pressure in and of itself. When asked by the Washington Post if they discussed the certification in their two-minute phone call, Palmer said, “It’s hard for me to describe. There was a lot of adrenaline and stress going on. There were general comments about different states but we really didn’t discuss the details of the certification.”

Not sure what “general comments about different states” means—why would the president call a Wayne County, Michigan canvassing board member and discuss states other than Michigan? It’s all totally moot anyway—legally the vote has been certified and rescinding on paper doesn’t change that—but trying to make any of it makes sense is enough to make you batty.

But making us batty is probably the point. Trump appears to be taking Steve Bannon’s “flood the zone with sh*t” approach to the media, but also applying it to our electoral process. It doesn’t matter if he’s 1–29 in post-election court cases. It doesn’t matter if the legal team keeps getting replaced with kookier and kookier players. It doesn’t matter if every statement the president has made since the election is a bold-faced lie or a repeat of fringe right-wing media conspiracy theories. The chaos and confusion are the point. If you create an atmosphere of doubt and suspicion, paint a picture so outrageous and so evil that it seems like there’s no way someone would make something like that up, keep engendering distrust in actual journalism that serves as a check on those in power, and you can almost make a case for just tossing the whole election out due to the chaos you yourself created.

Of course, this damages the U.S. in immeasurable ways, but who cares about the damage done to the country as long as Trump’s narcissistic needs are met? That’s where we are. And far too many Republicans are going along with the madness, naively waiting for a president who is incapable of admitting defeat to finally admit defeat, and foolishly ignoring the monster their coddling of his ego is creating in the body politic in the meantime.

Wayne county’s flip-flopping is just one of many more nutty things we can expect to see in the coming weeks as certification deadlines loom. Trump is not going to miraculously concede the election, ever, and he will pull as many people along on his power trip as he can. Let’s just hope the country’s foundation can hold out long enough for the will of the people to prevail as it should and for sanity to return to the Oval Office.

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The Best Dark Lagers To Swig This Season, According To Bartenders

Part of why we enjoy the changing of the seasons is that we can finally drink darker beers. And while we’re very close to going all-in on stouts, porters, and scotch ales, we can still get behind lagers during these late-fall days. Especially dark and black lagers.

In the simplest terms, dark lagers (also known as dunkels) are darker than regular lagers and get their color and flavor from dark malts. Black lagers (also known as Schwarzbiers) are black in color and primarily have strong chocolate, coffee (and sometimes smoky) flavors. Similar to stouts, they draw those flavor notes from roasted malts.

To help us get the most out of our late-fall beer-swigging, we went to the experts for help. We asked a handful of our favorite bartenders to tell us their favorite dark and black lagers for fall drinking. Check out all of their answers below!

Blue Stallion Dunkel

Dante Wheat, bartender and founder of Raw Pineapples in Louisville

Blue Stallion Dunkel. I am not the biggest fan of dark lagers. However, I had too many of these at a fall beer festival in 2017. I can’t remember the flavors, but I do remember refusing to drink anything else.

Take from that what you will.

Baladin Leon

Randall Restiano, beverage director of Eataly NYC Flatiron in New York City

Baladin Leon. We work with a lot of Italian beer and Baladin is always around, downstairs in our restaurants, and even on the rooftop bar. This particular beer uses whiskey yeasts in the fermentation and is only made during the winter solstice. The result is what they call a Belgian Dark Ale and the flavors of toasted nuts and a variety of fruits, along with its warming full-bodied 9% ABV, makes it perfect for the winter months.

Yuengling Lager

Andy Printy, beverage director at Chao Baan in St. Louis

I’d have to go with Yuengling for this one.

Even though it’s not technically a “dark lager,” it’s much darker than most lagers. America’s oldest registered brewery is not only inexpensive and readily available anywhere East of the Mississippi River, but it may also have the largest cult following in the beer world. Expanding distribution nationally soon, it has a light lager body, toasty and roasty barley tones, and a dry finish that might rival some Champagnes.

Perrin Black

Hayden Miller, head bartender at Bodega Taqueria y Tequila in Miami

Perrin Black. Rich, dark flavor but a crisp, lighter than expected body. This beer is awesome with its rich, hints of bitter chocolate and roasted malts.

New Belgium 1554

Nick Cole, bartender at Kimpton Sawyer Hotel in Sacramento

I’ve only had a few black lagers in my time, but the best one would have to be 1554 by New Belgium. It’s simply the easiest to drink and easiest on the palate. Think of a porter but way lighter, from the light lager yeast they put in it.

The coffee notes are amazing.

Small Beer Dark Lager

Roberto Berdecia, bartender at La Factoria in San Juan, Puerto Rico

There is a new company called Small Beer that makes beers with low ABV and their dark lager is very good. It’s vegan and low in carbs, but heavy on flavors like roasted coffee and chocolate.

Guinness Black Lager

Nestor Marchand, director of food and beverage at Plunge Beach Resort in Fort Lauderdale, Florida

Guinness Black Lager is a newer brew from the historic Guinness Brewery in Ireland. This one is flavorful and lighter than the stout that they are famous for.

Köstritzer Schwarzbier

Eli Gay, taproom manager at NOLA Brewing in New Orleans

Köstritzer Schwarzbier.

Breweries are in a constant struggle to stay relevant. Try staying relevant for 477 years.

Köstritzer was founded in 1543 and still makes one of the best examples of this clean, flavorful session beer. If you have not already, you owe it to yourself to try one of these.

Writer’s Picks:

Jack’s Abby Smoke and Dagger

This one might raise a few eyebrows. While it’s partly a dark (or black) lager, it’s also partly a smoked porter. It’s a lot darker than most of the lagers on this list and it’s full of chocolate, smoke, and vanilla. It’s pretty much a s’more in a glass.

Uinta Baba Black Lager

With a name like Baba Black Lager, you kind of know what you’re in for. It’s complex, rich, full of roasted malts, and hints of chocolate and ends with a subtle flourish of smoke.

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Rob Pelinka Anticipates A ‘Balancing Act’ To Keep LeBron James Healthy This Year

The Lakers probably have the most to worry about when it comes to the short layoff between the end of the NBA Finals and the start of the 2020-21 season. Not only because they played the longest season of anyone besides Miami, but also because the Lakers’ roster was already on the older side and will need to be cautious to stay healthy.

In a call with reporters on Thursday, general manager Rob Pelinka expounded on how he sees LeBron James keeping his body ready during the 2020-21 campaign, which starts in just over a month.

“The great thing about LeBron is he is so methodical and scientific in terms of how he prepares his body with the team he works with,” Pelinka said, adding, “That will just be a balancing act throughout the season of recognizing that there was an extremely short layoff between championship and start of season.”

The fact that James — who is eighth in league history in regular season minutes played and first in postseason minutes played — has prolonged his career to this degree already is a testament to his commitment to his body and health, so this season should be no different. However, with James and the Lakers as well as across the NBA, fans should probably be ready for more rest and minutes restrictions than even a normal season.

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The Best ‘Chappelle’s Show’ Sketches, Ranked

When we looked back at the best sketch comedy shows of the last 30 years a few months ago we said Chappelle’s Show often reached “a rarefied space with material that was surprising, unforgettable, and occasionally even profound.” And then we ranked it number 1. After a rewatch made possible by the show’s arrival on Netflix (and HBO Max), it’s easy to double down on that praise, particularly when you consider not just the more memorable sketches but also the truly inspired doubles and triples that helped to make each episode ripe for revisitation. A quick revisitation, since there are only 28 of them.

To inspire that ride, we decided to look back at the 15 best sketches from the show’s run, which is, of course, a highly subjective thing to do. I promise you, you will question my sanity and ability to do this job after reading this list (more than the normal amount, even). Especially since I have a predilection for some more obscure sketches that aren’t likely to front other such lists. But isn’t that part of the point? Sparking conversation and passionate defense of your favorites So, this is my attempt, read it, hopefully enjoy some of it, and then fire back with your own.

15. What Makes White People Dance – S2E3

Under the guise of social anthropology, Chappelle and his pal John Mayer infiltrate a board room, a restaurant, and a barbershop to prove the theory that the electric guitar entrances cause white people to dance. It is a silly, random bit that hits a high point when Questlove pops up to expand on the theory, but the best thing connected to this might be Chappelle, Mayer, and Questlove’s cover of the Diff’rent Strokes theme song at the end of the episode.

14. AND-1 Mixtape – S1E12

The above clip is only a small part. You can check out the full clip of Chappelle mocking baseball, tennis, and bowling’s inability to showcase showoffs to the level of streetball here. This predates the slight uptick in expressiveness and personality in baseball, so I’d actually kill to see an AND-1 level video of bat flips and dugout dances in 2020. Nevertheless, this still lands, especially the visual of Chappelle stunting while bowling.

13. Make A Wish Kid – S1E11

Chappelle goes to visit a sick kid and plays a video game with him to ease his pain. Until Chappelle’s competitive fire gets the best of him. Goddamn does this get dark. If you’re a fan of fucked up comedy, this probably ranks higher on the list for you than for most other folks.

12. Roots Outakes – S1E3

The laughs come from the absurdity of some executive being oblivious enough to try and mine the reverence felt for Roots by adding bloopers and goofs to a special edition DVD, but this also feels like a comment about the entertainment industry’s eagerness to profit off Black trauma.

11. Tyrone Biggums’ Classroom Visit – S1E2

Plenty of ways to celebrate one of Chappelle’s Show’s most enduring characters — the intervention sketch, the Fear Factor sketch — but I’ll go with the first impression for the initial shock value of seeing Tyrone taint a classroom full of children with a few anecdotes and one trash can poop.

10. Dave Gets Oprah Pregnant – S2E8

It’s okay to have dreams, folks. Dave’s is to claim a share of Oprah’s seemingly endless treasure by putting a baby inside of her and we are here for it as Chappelle lives life to the fullest, painting nudes, getting extended massages, and rocking crowns while boxing out Oprah’s previous boyfriend and providing the bare minimum of emotional support to Oprah.

9. Kneehigh Park – S2E10

Another dark sketch, this time using the look and feel of a kid’s puppet show to talk about heroin, venereal diseases, and introduce the world to a trash can man who has the anthemic “I Said Fuck It” song about giving up lodged firmly in his heart. And then Snoop Dogg and Tyronne Biggums stop by. And that’s to say nothing of the large infected puppet penis that makes an appearance. That is until now. Infected puppet penis.

8. Home Stenographer – S1E1

Chappelle’s Show had a flair for taking tropes and expanding them until the material feels as fresh as it does relatable and this is an example. Because you know if you’ve been in a couple-fight that you’ve been misquoted or misunderstood and cracked the joke about having a stenographer or recording of what you said.

7. Wrap It Up! – S1E2

Like Home Stenographer this is a pretty basic joke made better by the execution as Chappelle takes the idea of playing someone off the stage at the Oscars and applies it to ineffective screwing and other social situations where you want people to just shut up and be done with it. Like me with this article.

6. The Player Haters Ball – S1E9

The original Player Haters Ball is packed with an amazing collection of characters and some of the best work on the show from Donnell Rawlings and the dearly departed Charlie Murphy (as well as Ice T and the late Patrice O’Neal) as they all trade insults and hate with Chappelle’s Silky Johnston. It’s a classic. I couldn’t possibly omit it, but I actually favor the spectacle that is The Player Hater’s Science Fair, where the player haters time travel to become The Time Haters. It’s a completely bonkers idea built atop the foundation of these characters and something too good to keep in a drawer, which is why it’s a part of Chappelle Show’s episode (S2E11) focused on supposed misses and sketches that had failed to make it to air.

5. PopCopy – S1E1

“Why treat the customer this way? Why? Cuz fuck em, that’s why.”

Yes, retail workers can be assholes, but I was working the customer service desk of a Kmart when this sketch first dropped so you can imagine how close to my heart I kept it and how I was maybe missing the point and rooting for the wrong side. Michael Rappaport lying to a customer to get rid of them and then deciding that he’s had enough and needs to just walk away so he can take a shit? I felt that. Customers ask stupid questions stupidly and so much of the retail existence is just trying to get past dealing with them so you can hang out with your friends. Retail workers were heroes long before they had to deal with regular customer nonsense and COVID exposure at the same time.

4. Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories: Prince – S2E5
3. Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories: Rick James – S2E4

This is essentially a tie. So many elements from Chappelle’s Show have stuck around, but “cocaine is a hell of a drug,” pickup basketball and pancakes with Prince, and “I’m Rick James bitch!” may be the most enduring and referenced. Leaning on Murphy’s amazing life of experiences running with his famous brother Eddie was a genius move that showcased Murphy and unlocked Chappelle’s amazing Rick James and Prince impressions. But nothing compares to James, himself, refuting (and then instantly confirming) elements from Murphy’s tale. Print the legend.

2. Mad Real World – S1E6

Longform sketch comedy at its best and a bit that benefits so much from really perfect and intricate set design and just the density of the scene. There’s so much comedy packed into these 10 or so minutes. And everyone gets a turn, specifically Donnell Rawlings, Charlie Murphy, and comedian Christian Finnegan, who steals the whole thing as a plucky Real World roommate who gets run through a gauntlet of psychological and physical bullying and torture, losing his girlfriend and almost his mind. This narrowly misses being the best Chappelle’s Show sketch but it’s my personal favorite.

1. Clayton Bigsby, The World’s Only Black White Supremacist – S1E1

The plot is summed up completely by the title and the biggest laugh probably comes in the first 90 seconds with Chappelle’s reveal as Bigsby, an aged, blind, hatemonger who thinks he’s white. But the genius is in the slow play execution and commitment of Chappelle and the late William Bogert, who plays the straight-laced Frontline reporter. It’s a nine-minute sketch that builds the world around Bigsby, leading to a fuller payoff at the end when all is revealed… including what might be the second greatest exploding head in entertainment history next to the dude in Scanners.

I don’t just remember the sketch, I remember seeing it for the first time, how hard it hit, and how clearly it announced the intentions of the show. There are so many iconic moments on this list but this is the one that sort of paved the way for everything that followed so how do you not put it at number one? That’s a rhetorical question, but I await your replies.

Honorable Mention:

These sketches fell just shy of the top 15 but we had to mention them.

Trading Spouses — Cultures collide as Chappelle’s Show explores weird wife swap reality shows.

WacArnolds — An upbeat and driven fast-food worker’s life turns into a slow-rolling trainwreck.

The Wayne Brady Show — Wayne Brady’s squeaky clean image does all the heavy lifting while taking Chappelle through a nightmare glimpse into his secret life as a lawless gun-toting pimp.

Mos Def Musical Performance — Not a comedy sketch, just an ultracool moment with Yasiin Bey (aka Mos Def) rapping “Close Edge” in the passenger seat while Chappelle drives down a New York street. I hope Chappelle is getting some of James Corden’s Carpool Karaoke money.

Black Bush — Chappelle runs through some of the lowlights of the Bush presidency (remember this show ran from 2004-2006) while imagining how his moves would have been executed and perceived had he been Black.