On Kid Cudi’s new album Man On The Moon III: The Chosen, it seems like the track “Beautiful Trip” would be considered something of an afterthought. The album-opener is only 37 seconds long, it’s an abstract tune that serves as a quick introduction to the record, and it doesn’t seem like it’s primarily meant to be consumed as an individual work. However, the song has actually made history, as it is officially the shortest song to ever place on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
On the Hot 100 chart dated December 26, “Beautiful Trip” (which is shorter than the amount of time it probably takes to read this post) squeaked in at No. 100, presumably because it was the first track of a popular album that many people took the time to listen to when playing the full album through. “Beautiful Trip” is eight seconds shorter than the previous record-holder, which was Piko-Taro’s “PPAP (Pen-Pineapple-Apple-Pen),” a 45-second track that reached No. 77 in October 2016. Those two songs are the only sub-minute songs to ever make the chart.
(Finneas has a writing and production credit on “Beautiful Trip,” so congratulations are in order for him as well.)
The past couple years have been active as far as chart records related to song length. Last year, Tool’s song “Fear Inoculum” became the longest one to ever appear on the Hot 100 and the only one over 10 minutes. Also last year, Lil Nas X’s “Old Town Road” became the shortest No. 1 song since 1965.
If you have under a minute to spare, listen to “Beautiful Trip” below. If you have more than a minute, also read our review of Man On The Moon III: The Chosenhere.
In January, no one could have predicted that one of the year’s biggest comeback stories would belong to drive-in theaters. It would be a bit like predicting a resurgence of rotary phones or cassette tapes. Sure, they used to be everywhere and if you look hard enough you can still find them, but who uses them anymore? In a pandemic, however, it turns out that most anyone who wanted to see a film projected took a new interest in going to the drive-in. And why not? Watching a movie under the stars is a pleasure we gave up too soon, thanks to changing tastes, trends in real estate, and the introduction of the VCR. But they used to thrive. And for a couple of decades after World War II, they served as a natural home for stories of alien visitors and otherworldly happenings.
They did the same for a few days this summer, too.
Ahead of its Prime Video release, the film The Vast of Nightplayed a few select drive-ins. The promotion was a bit of a gimmick, but an apt gimmick. The first feature by Oklahoma-based director Andrew Patterson, The Vast of Night is deeply influenced by ’50s and ’60s science fiction movies and TV, even using a Twilight Zone-like show as a framing device. But though the homages don’t stop there, there’s no mistaking the film for a product of another time. Scrappily made but breathtakingly original, it’s the confident vision of a filmmaker drawing a variety of influences and using the tools at his disposal — a modest, self-financed budget powered by income from directing commercials in Oklahoma — to make the movie in his head.
Nobody else was going to make it, after all. Patterson co-wrote the screenplay (under another name) with Craig W. Sanger, whose research allowed him to recreate a night in the life of a small New Mexico border town that serves as the unexpected site of some weird occurrences. (Patterson also refrains from giving himself a directing credit.)
It’s not the sort of script that follows the Robert McKee or Syd Field playbook. It begins as a long, bantery walk-and-talk between its teen protagonists, a fast-talking, small-town DJ named Everett (Jake Horowitz), and a switchboard operator with a passion for science named Fay (Sierra McCormick). It ends — well, it’s best not to say how it ends. In fact, it’s a little hard to describe even if you try.
Along the way, Patterson keeps redefining what sort of film we’re watching. There are flashes of bravura, how-did-they-do-that filmmaking, including a long, unbroken shot that moves from one side of town to another (then keeps going) accomplished partly via Go-Kart. In other scenes Patterson relies entirely on words, even dropping out the images entirely during one monologue from a never-seen radio listener named Billy (Bruce Davis) who captivates Fay and Everett with stories of mysterious covert missions performed during his time in the military. This and another, later monologue from veteran Texas actor Gail Cronauer, who plays an older woman named Mabel who remembers the town’s past, help tweak the idealized image of small-town ’50s by acknowledging the era’s racism and sexism. Billy and others like him were given top-secret assignments because no one would believe the stories of a Black man. A single mother raising an unusual child, Mabel ran into problems of her own.
Patterson shot the film in 2016 then spent the succeeding years editing it, again under another name. (Cast photos from its premiere feature a visibly older cast.) “I definitely was too close to the film,” Patterson told Indiewire’s Anne Thompson. “I thought I hadn’t gotten what I needed, I didn’t have enough coverage because of the budget. I got so close I could no longer see the magic in it.” In the end, however, he brought it all together, creating a strange, mysterious, science fiction gem whose champions came to include Steven Soderbergh.
Soderbergh knows something about starting small and working outside the system. His 1989 film Sex, Lies, and Videotape turned festival praise into commercial success, helping to kick the American independent film scene into a new gear. That scene becoming a vibrant, thriving movement that helped reshape the movie business in the 1990s. We’ll never see its’ like again. The conditions that created it no longer exist and the industry’s interest in independent films seldom extends beyond seeing it as a pipeline to the franchise world.
There are worse fates. If anyone can redefine blockbusters for the ’20s it’s Chloe Zhao and Barry Jenkins. And maybe that’s Patterson’s destiny as well. But what’s most heartening about The Vast of Night, isn’t the potential it suggests for bigger films. It’s remarkable on its own scale.
Patterson’s story of self-financing isn’t quite Robert Townshend financing Hollywood Shuffle by maxing out credit cards or Kevin Smith selling his comics to make Clerks. But he undoubtedly still had to stretch every dollar and cut as many corners as could be cut. In the end, he made a movie that no one else could have made. What’s more, that movie made it into the world, premiering at Slamdance after multiple rejections and ultimately landing just a click away (if only for subscribers to a particular streaming service, but that’s another issue).
The world Sex, Lies and Videotape helped create may have disappeared but the possibilities it suggested haven’t entirely vanished. There’s still room for small, weird movies to get made and an audience eager to embrace the best of them when they do. After all, if the drive-in can make a comeback, surely anything is possible.
I don’t need to remind you of the dumpster fire we’re currently enduring in reality, so it’s enough to stress that we all need to freaking unwind. We all do that in different ways when it comes to picking TV shows, but Netflix knows that, every now and then, even the most sophisticated people among us can appreciate a guilty pleasure of a story. Sometimes these trashy, enthusiastically embraced shows actually end up being good, but not always, although it certainly helps if there’s some tangible value. In the case of Shondaland’s Bridgerton, there’s definitely that value. You’ve got a guilty pleasure with a scandalous, wildly romantic romp through 19th-Century Regency England, and you can indulge in this hot mess while witnessing some subversive feminism.
This show does not go heavy-handed with meaningful moments, but it’s sure nice to see some substance within all the fizzy and buzzy aspects of this series. In other words, this is not an Emily In Paris situation. Bridgerton might be pure escapism that wraps itself in miles of shimmering, lavish fabric, but it also contains the same measure of solid messaging. Sex positivity abounds and does so from the female perspective. It’s an unexpected approach for the story’s scandal-ridden marriage market, and while some outcomes are predictable, there’s so much going on here that predictable doesn’t even matter. It’s a jam-packed show without feeling overstuffed, and there’s not an ounce of fat within eight episodes. And this show still manages to be a sultry, sexy confection.
With that said, this is Shonda Rhimes’ first Netflix show, and it’s part of a nine-figure deal to deliver what she’s known for delivering. And given that she’s the creator of several shows, including Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal, and How To Get Away With Murder, anyone who knows her work will have a good idea of what to anticipate, even though Bridgerton is Rhimes’ first period drama. As far as expectations go, what you need to know is this:
– Bridgerton is not a show that will appeal to everyone. If I was to make a comparison to another recent Netflix series, The Queen’s Gambit carries far more universal appeal. You didn’t need to know anything about chess or even be at all interested in the game to enjoy the underdog tale of Beth Harmon and how Anya Taylor-Joy’s the master of a steely stare. A lot of people who watched that show suddenly wanted to play chess. In contrast, Bridgerton won’t make you want to do anything, other than sit back and enjoy the scandal. Here, the audience is far more specific, and you’ll need to (at least slightly) enjoy the romance genre to give this show a fair shot.
Netflix
– The challenge of achieving cast diversity and inclusivity within 19th Century, high-society England is huge. While Rhimes and her creator Chris Van Dusen adapted the series from books by Julia Quinn, they drew upon nuggets of history. They included the figure of Queen Charlotte (Golda Rosheuvel), who’s thought to be the first biracial royal in England. The show operates under the assumption that Charlotte’s heritage was not only groundbreaking but led to a diverse aristocracy, where English dukes and ladies were often people of color. Likewise, the feminist leanings of characters don’t seem out of place, even in a historical period where the value of a female prior to marriage lies solely within her virginity and the size of her dowry. It’s a very careful balance to achieve, but the writers pulled it off.
– There’s a lot of Gossip Girl flavor here. Julie Andrews plays a narrator who’s also an alias-clad, fresh-on-the-scene gossip columnist known as Lady Whistledown. She’s tearing high society’s little world apart, including families who are aghast at the mere thought of acquiring a bad look during debutante season. She’s key to ruining the chances of our protagonist, Daphne (Phoebe Dynover, somehow portraying both naive and self-possessed vibes), the eldest Bridgerton daughter, who the queen declared to be a “flawless” marriage candidate. Thanks to a set of circumstances including Whistledown, Daphne’s in a precarious situation. In order to salvage her marriage chances, she enters into a deal with an unrepentant bachelor, the Duke of Hastings (Regé-Jean Page), to meet their mutual goals while the vultures descend. They agree not to love each other, but yup, you know how that goes.
– All of this sounds very predictable, and I get it. However, the enjoyment factor associated with Bridgerton is not where it arrives but how it gets there. There are so many ups and downs to Daphne and the Duke’s ordeals together that one will be constantly entertained. There are tons and tons of couplings, which all arrive with motives and mislaid intentions and fallout, and the vicarious sense of escapism here is almost as seductive as the sex scenes (which all actually have a place within the story, so they are lurid, yes, but not gratuitous). Likewise, one might believe there’s a predictable way in which female characters challenge the patriarchal structures that confine them. That, too, does not happen as anticipated. It’s very fun to watch the feminist parts of this show unfurl.
– Speaking of fun, this show’s going to be one hell of a phenomenon on social media. With The Witcher being pushed back a few months into 2021, Bridgerton will shoulder a lot of fandom over the coming weeks. God help Regé-Jean Page because Twitter’s thirst for his character will be insurmountable over the holidays. He and Phoebe Dynover are both fantastic in their roles, but given how this show’s written and how gender dynamics play out, one had better hope that Page braced himself to be an object of desire. He can likely handle it, and it’s actually quite refreshing to know that the swooning will be due to a character who’s actually good-hearted underneath his rakish exterior (instead of, say, Penn Badgley’s You stalker).
Ultimately, Bridgerton will be, as the younger adults say these days, a very non-problematic fave. It’s diverse and inclusive and intersectional and all of those progressive descriptors, but it’s also important to note that this show never forgets that, first and foremost, it’s entertainment. And for those who tune in, the show will be an irresistible binge to help us endure this very problematic holiday season.
Netflix’s ‘Bridgerton’ will begin streaming on December 25.
To state the obvious, we’ve all missed friends, family, and the rhythms of normal life during the pandemic. But while some of us have endured, canceling weddings or missing funerals, some have thrown massive house parties or flipped out over not getting a haircut. Millions have bought into dangerous anti-science attitudes and the idea that they should flout public safety guidelines with pride. No shared sacrifice from them, just sacrifice deferred or foisted onto others.
It’s hard to think about all of that and not be pissed, isn’t it? Not just for the immediate risk but for the worry that it might change how we look at people long term. You know, when things tip back toward normal (whenever and however that is). What’s the solution? Unsure, but it probably starts with trying to focus on the things about the human race that you find to be charming. And for me, that’s been a little easier thanks to HBO’s How To with John Wilson.
Created by documentarian John Wilson and produced by Nathan For You‘s Nathan Felder, the show is a six-episode patchwork exploration of seemingly pedestrian topics through micro-interactions with (mostly) New Yorkers. A triumph of editing what Wilson previously told us was a “psychotic” amount of footage, the show features a mix of the mundane and weird while aiming to get laughs from the absurdity of life and a cavalcade of strangers with unique personalities.
That’s how we wind up taking a bonkers tour of a kindly foreskin regrowth enthusiast’s home before witnessing his dork out review of the film Parasite. Or how we go from the stuffing aisle at a Stop & Shop with a software inventory expert to his office where he starts talking about the JFK assassination and The Mandella Effect. But foreskin guy was the most outrageous moment in a thought-provoking episode about our penchant for being over-precious about the things we love. And the Mandella Effect guy is a big part of an episode about memory. Clearly, How To with John Wilson wants to be defined by more than the funny moments that color the outside of its cereal box. It wants to be profound while talking about the history of scaffolding and launching into a thoroughly awkward exercise in small talk and making friends.
The season’s final episode is its richest and most heart-filled. It’s a story about the simple kindness of Wilson trying to say thank you to his elderly landlord with a loving attempt to make the perfect risotto. But it goes to an all too real place. Set against the early stages of the COVID outbreak in New York and New Jersey, reminders of the long lines, confusion, fear, and budding denial sting from nine months (and counting) down the road where it all got much bigger and more frightening than we could have imagined.
In the episode, Wilson realizes he might not have the chance to deliver the perfect gesture to his landlord when she’s rushed to the hospital after suffering a stroke in the midst of all this. The fragility of life, an immutable fact we (and certainly I) like to dance around, is made quite clear here. It’s a message that penetrates shields made tough by months of seeing rising numbers that, at once, mark the sick and dead and anonymize the loss.
I should add, at this point, that I don’t want to make it seem like How To is only great because of the bubble moment we’re in. That’s not the case. Frankly, we’ve been having trouble seeing each other for a long time. Well before COVID. We have a structural need for things like this that are fresh, real, strange, and, as such, unforgettable. Especially as we view and deal, more frequently, with other people through screens instead of out in the real world. Again, a problem before all of this.
How To with John Wilson is a lot of things but, primarily, it’s a testament to the virtues of openness and the charming quirks of human beings. It exists because Wilson is willing to look, listen, and live beside people as they reveal themselves to him and us. He wants to know what their story is, and because of that, I do too. And that’s a totally alien thing right now as we rush through this hellish moment, interacting with people in minor ways while in passing, always stressed, anxious, and sleepwalking to an extent. This show makes me miss people at a level I didn’t think possible while sat in my annoyance with them. The show is powerful, yes, but not as powerful as what it evokes in me — an openness of my own at a time when being closed off and even spiteful feels more natural but which, I know, is less good.
‘How To With John Wilson’ is streaming now on HBO Max.
A few months ago, Showtime announced that it would be. bringing Dexter back for another season, over seven years after its original run ended. There are a few things that fans will demand of the reboot, and everyone expects that Jennifer Carpenter will be back, even though her character, Debra Morgan, was killed off in the original series finale. She will probably end up being Dexter’s new Dark Passenger, because the Dexter showrunner has said that he will not undo the first ending.
One character that no one expects back is Rita Bennett, the love-interest of Dexter played by Julie Benz for four seasons. Bennett was killed off the series in the fourth season by John Lithgow’s Trinity Killer in what was — for its time — one of the most shocking deaths in television history. Bennett’s death came before killing off major characters was de rigueur thanks to series like The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones. It wasn’t just shocking for fans, however. It was also shocking for Julie Benz, who answered “getting killed off Dexter” to Michael Rosenbaum’s question, “What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to you as an actress?”
“I found out three days before,” she told Rosenbaum on the Inside of You podcast. She got called into the producers’ room and she knew, then, that she was being written out.
“I started having a panic attack, and I called my manager at the time, and I said, ‘Oh my God, I think they’re killing me off.” She said she then called her now husband and also told him that she thought she was about to get killed off, and he said, ‘Maybe they’re giving you a raise,’ which “really broke my heart because you don’t get a raise that way.”
She tried to get in and out and get it over with as quickly as possible, and when she went into their office, even before they fired her, Benz thanked them for a great four years. She tried to get out before she had a panic attack, but they wanted to have a conversation and process her exit because it was upsetting for everyone. To make matters worse, Benz had only been in the office at the time to do some voice-over work for the show but had otherwise just returned from the gym, so she was only wearing a sports bra and leggings.
“All I could think about is that movie where the guy is getting broken up with while he’s naked. Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I don’t have a shirt on, and I’m losing my job. I felt so vulnerable,” she said.
Benz admitted that she “bawled” in the room, even though she didn’t want to. She also hugged everyone, even though she was sweaty. “I was really upset. It was such a great family, and here you are being told, ‘OK, we’re still going to be getting together as a family, but you are on your own.’ It was really hard.”
Benz said it took her a long time — and therapy — to get over her exit, although she did get some words of encouragement from actress Elizabeth Mitchell, who had just been killed off of Lost. She told Benz just to be honest while doing press, and say, “‘Yeah, I got killed off the show. It sucked. For me. I was upset.”
Bennett also admitted on the podcast that she doesn’t have bathtubs in her home (her character was killed off in a bathtub).
Meanwhile, for Benz, it appears as though that family will be getting together again without her, although she has obviously done very well since Dexter, having been cast as a regular in two (now canceled) series (Defiance, Showtime’s On Becoming a God in Central Florida) and a recurring role in Hawaii Five-O, in addition to some other consistent television and movie work.
It has become a cliché to hate and insult Nickelback (a point I explored a few years ago and still stand by), a high-achieving band that plays a style of music that is no longer conducive to the chart-topping success they once enjoyed. Nickelback parodies haven’t been funny for a long time now, but they take on a different tone when it’s Nickelback themselves doing the parodying, which is exactly what happens in a great new ad from Google.
To promote Google Photos, Chad Kroeger (who has a sense of humor about the ire he and his band draw) recorded new lyrics for his band’s hit “Photograph,” which is perhaps the most memed song of its era. The video starts with an altered clip from the song’s original video, which shows Kroeger holding up a phone instead of a picture frame as he sings, “Look at this photograph.”
As the song goes on, Kroeger pokes fun at things like his often-criticized old hairstyle, as he sings, “Falling down the photo rabbit hole / Is it my hair or just a ramen bowl?” He then launches into the altered chorus, “Every memory regretting all my hairstyles / If you wove it all together, it would go for miles / It’s hard to braid it, time to shave it / Goodbye, highlights.”
The ad is about as successful and amusing of a self-deprecating parody as an artist has made lately, so check it out above.
Nickelback is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.
I am not saying Guy Fieri is Santa Claus. I want to be very clear about that. It would be crazy for me to say that celebrity chef Guy Fieri is secretly also Santa Claus, the magical figure who brings presents to little boys and girls all over the world every Christmas Eve. I’m not crazy. All I’m doing here is listing similarities between the two of them. I’m not trying to imply anything here. I’m just stating a few — okay, eleven — objectively true facts. Now, with that said, I can’t stop you from coming to your own conclusions after reading them. Maybe you’ll get to the end of the list and say “Hmm, there sure are a lot of similarities between Santa Claus and Guy Fieri. Almost… too many similarities…” That is your right as a free-thinking person.
But I’m not saying it. I’m not saying Guy Fieri is or even might be Santa Claus. I’m just stating some facts. Where you go from here is up to you.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri are both jolly
The jolliness of Santa Claus is not in dispute. There are like ten Christmas songs that reference it. He’s a sweet man who wants people to be happy.
Guy Fieri is also jolly. He is so happy all the time and brings an infectious optimism to every kitchen he visits.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri both show up places to spread joy and eat snacks
Santa Claus crisscrosses the globe to deliver presents and stops at each house to enjoy some cookies and milk.
Guy Fieri crisscrosses the globe to highlight small local businesses and gives them free publicity by enjoying their specialties on camera for an audience of millions.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri are both associated with magical towns that may or may not exist
Santa Claus lives in the North Pole, a magical place with a workshop capable of making enough toys for every child in the world.
Guy Fieri frequently references Flavortown, a magical place where the rivers flow with nacho cheese and the hospitals treat patients with lasagna instead of medicine.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri both have a signature look
Santa Claus wears a bright red suit and a floppy hat and has a white beard and appears to look like this all the time.
Guy Fieri wears flame-emblazoned bowling shirts and has spiky bleached hair and a spiky bleached goatee and appears to look like this all the time.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri both cruise around in a classic red ride with an open-top
Santa Claus flies around the world in a red sleigh, his hat flapping in the breeze as the wind blows through it.
Guy Fieri drives around the world in a red convertible, his hair not moving even a little as the wind slides right off his aerodynamically gelled blonde tips.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri both cover huge distances in a seemingly impossible amount of time
Santa Claus delivers presents to children all over the world in one night, which is a pretty astounding feat even when you consider time zones.
Guy Fieri sometimes visits three restaurants in three different states in one 30-minute episode of Diners, Drive-ins & Dives, which is a pretty astounding feat even when you consider editing.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri are both fond of reindeer
Santa Claus has a team of beloved reindeer that help him soar through the sky and he gave them all cheery little names like Dasher and Comet.
Guy Fieri once ate a reindeer hoagie at a restaurant in North Pole, Alaska, which is admittedly a different kind of “fond” but still worth noting.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri both have catchphrases
Santa Claus has a number of well-known sayings, from “Ho Ho Ho” to “Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.”
Guy Fieri has a number of well-known sayings, from “out of bounds” to “this is bananas… and bananas is good.”
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri have both had their Lamborghini stolen by a teenage supervillain who was planning to steal a helicopter for a diamond heist when police caught him and was later almost busted out of prison by a group of friends who were banging on the walls with a sledgehammer
Okay, this one is actually just a Guy Fieri thing, but it is true, and it is one of my favorite stories ever, and to be perfectly honest none of us know for sure that Santa Claus has never had a Lamborghini stolen by a teenager who rappelled into a showroom and drove it right out the front door, so I think it’s fair to include it until someone can prove to me definitively that it did not happen.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri would both let you sit in their lap and tell them some things you want, probably
Santa Claus invites children everywhere to sit on his lap and pose for pictures and tell him all the things they want for Christmas.
Guy Fieri seems like a nice enough dude that would probably let you do this too if you asked nicely and weren’t all weird about it.
Santa Claus and Guy Fieri are both people who could just show up on your roof and slide down your chimney and into your living room without you calling the cops on them
The list of people this applies to is very, very short. It might just be these two if we’re being honest about it. Santa, for obvious reasons. And Guy Fieri, too. You would be kind of excited if Guy Fieri tumbled down your chimney and into your living room on Christmas Eve. Do not lie to me. You would be surprised, sure, that’s fair. But once you realized what was happening, you’d probably be into it. You would. He would probably have a sack full of, like, beef jerky and pretzels to share. It would be a pretty cool Christmas.
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Although seeing our loved ones may be difficult this Christmas year, we can still send and receive presents to brighten our spirits. If you need some help with last-minute shopping, we found that perfect gifts on Amazon that’s affordable and fun. The best part? Everything is less than $20. And trust us, these gifts will have everyone smiling this holiday season. From blueberry cobbler soy candles to black truffle oil and light saber chopsticks, we have everyone covered. We truly found a gift for every special person in your life.
Most of us are working from home these days, and what better way to enjoy our early morning coffee or tea than with this fancy stainless steel thermos mug. You can also take it with you in the car or go camping with it. It holds all liquids, so feel free to fill it with some booze or smoothies and look cool while doing it. It also keeps your beverages warmer for a longer time. At first glance it looks like a real camera lens, and the raised areas make it very easy to hold too. It’s the perfect gift for any photographer or coffee drinker alike.
When your special someone wants to read or watch something on their phone, you can stick it in front of the screen magnifier and see it amplified on a 12″ screen. It’s simple and easy to use, and all will be thanking you for this thoughtful gift. You can also use it to see photos and read emails—especially if your phone is tiny and it’s difficult to see the screen.
If you are a Star Wars fan and you like eating sushi, this is the perfect gift for you or a friend. It’s a perfect stocking stuffer or gag gift, but it’s also fun and makes snacking in the dark an entirely new experience. Seriously, who wouldn’t want this gift?
With everyone working from home these days, the best gifts should also smell great. These hand-poured candles are eco-friendly with soy wax that’s vegan, paraben and cruelty free. It lasts over 50 hours and smells fantastic. There are tons of scents to choose from including espresso bean, lemon and vanilla and crumb cake. There’s even a Mary Jane Cannabis candle in 9oz.
What’s better than a personalized gift for very little money? You can add up to 10 characters on the leather key chain, including your loved ones name, initials, or a personal message. You can also pick from black, blue, brown, cream, dark brown or gray key chains. It’s perfect for car keys or for a new home. Just engrave something special and let someone know you care.
This is one of our favorite gifts that anyone would be happy to unwrap. It’s Amazon’s #1 Best Selling item, and it is the perfect item to cook meats, eggs or even desserts. It’s pre-seasoned with 100% natural vegetable oil and you can use it to sear, sauté, broil, braise, fry, or grill anything you want. You can even bake with it in the oven or over a campfire in the wilderness. Trust us, once you use a cast iron skillet, you’ll never want to use another ordinary pan again!
This has great sound quality for a speaker of this size. It delivers a full bass sound and clear high range, as well. It has a fast connection and incredible wireless Bluetooth range of up to 100 unobstructed feet from your device. It has a long battery life and you can even bring it with you in the shower. This is the perfect gift to rock out on Christmas wet or dry.
What a year for alcohol. Between the crisp beers of the spring and summer, the spiced ales of fall and winter, the insane cadence of whiskey articles we drop, the holiday spike in brandy love, and the sheer pandemic-ness of it all, we here at Uproxx drank a whole lot this year. Us and everybody else with a pulse. Not just in that sad, lonely way, either –we also got tipsy on Zoom and tasted booze on IG live, laughing along with our pals via the wonders of technology.
To top off what has been a truly wild 2020, we gathered our alcohol writers (and a few ringers) to spill some tribute to the best brews they drank this year. There is no seasonal tie-in here, no complicated angle, not even any need for these beers to have been brewed this year. This is simply a list of the beers that — as cheesy as it sounds — brought smiles to our faces. If only for a moment.
I am by no means a low calories beer kind of person. I don’t obsess about how many calories a brew has, if it’s good, I’ll drink it. And like it. That has led me, foolishly I might add, to write off low calories beers as something that doesn’t quite cut the mustard in the flavor department.
This 96 calories Hazy IPA by Firestone Walker has opened my eyes.
Tasting Notes:
If you’re familiar with Firestone Walker, you’re well aware the brewery knows how to deliver an IPA. The Mind Haze is a personal favorite, and while this isn’t really quite at that level, the Flyjack still packs a lot of flavor. A burst of juicy citrus matches this beer’s bright and sunny — and slightly hazy — appearance, with subtle tropical notes jumping out on the palate only to be subdued by a slight hint of bitterness at the finish.
The Bottom Line:
At just 96 calories and all the flavor of a Hazy IPA, Flyjack has been my go-to beer this year. Look at me, counting calories in a beer! 2020 is bananas.
Style: Blonde Ale Brewery: Cascade Brewing ABV: 79%
The Beer:
I love Cascade Brewing’s barrel-aged ales. If the bottles weren’t so clearly designed to be shared, and the contents so damn heavy, I’d crush these nightly. Would it ruin the special occasion vibe? Maybe, but who cares?
2019’s Framboise Northwest was designed to give us a Northwest-style interpretation of the raspberry ales of the old world and is a blend of sour blond ales aged in oak wine barrels for two years with locally grown raspberries.
Tasting Notes:
If you’ve ever had a raspberry fresh off a bush from the PNW, you know how much flavor those little gems can pack. I’m happy to say, their utilization in this sour blond ale lives up to the experience. A sharp and tart fruit flavor greets the palate making way for notes of sour apple skin, rhubarb and cranberry that wraps itself up in a slightly dry finish that practicaly demands another sip.
Bottom Line:
The perfect bottle to crack open during the golden hour. The crisp, ruby red color looks great in a glass with the fading hours of daylight, and the rich, berry influenced flavors set you up for a brilliant pre-dinner dessert.
I love a good, full-bodied beer when the cooler months finally hit Texas – and this porter has certainly charmed my palate. Although it’s available year-round, I associate pecan-anything with fall and winter only. Moreover, Austin-based (512) Brewing Company uses organic ingredients (malt included) as much as possible, so this is what I sip when I want something fresh and flavorful. Plus, the hint of pecan notes in the nose and on the palate comes from locally grown pecans.
Speaking from experience, Texans absolutely love supporting local!
Tasting Notes:
The hue is the shade of midnight – and I’m completely here for it since I have an attraction to dark beers. In fact, it reminds me of the Bavarian beers my dad would tell me about that monks brewed in Munich back in the day. The subtle nutty flavor is met with chocolate and just the right amount of coffee which gives me permission to indulge in this black beauty for brunch at some point this winter. The bittersweet finish rounds out the fun of this most enjoyable porter experience.
Bottom Line:
Looks like this is my new go-to brew for winter! Pair with a cozy sweater, a playlist of your choice, and a fire for peak good vibes.
Cantillon dropped this extremely limited special release in July of 2019. I was lucky enough to get to drink it this summer and it almost instantly became my favorite beer, or at least my favorite fruited lambic. The beer is a lambic that’s fruited with haskap berries which are a type of wild blueberries that grows in western Canada. Imagine a large cylindric huckleberry. The berries spent two months soaking into the two-year-old lambic before bottling.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a combination of wild, woody red fruit next to clove, nutmeg, and allspice that’s hard not to fall in love with. That’s all cut by the light, acidic tartness of the lambic underneath. There’s no funk at play, only bold wild berries with an almost salted sweetness next to that wintry spice. It’s light yet bold. It’s refreshing and truly smile-inducing.
Bottom Line:
They only ended up with 500 bottles of this stuff (plus a few kegs). If you do find it, you’ll be for a one-off treat the married the wilds of Canada with the wild of Belgium lambics. A true treat.
Style: Hazy Double IPA Brewery: Cigar City ABV: 8%
The Beer:
This new hazy double IPA is available from July through September. It’s made with Motueka, Galaxy, Strata and Mosaic hops before being double dry-hopped. It’s hazy, juicy, and bursting with bright, floral hop flavors.
Tasting Notes:
This beer is perfect for fans of both hazy beers and hop heads. It’s not as juicy as other hazy IPAs and that’s not such a bad thing. It’s filled with hops but doesn’t have the bitterness that some IPAs carry. It’s refreshing, hoppy, and filled with hints of pine, citrus, and tropical fruits.
Bottom Line:
While this is a summer beer, it’s the kind of beer we drink all year long. We don’t care if it’s June or February we’re tempering our stouts with a healthy dose of juicy, hazy IPAs like this.
Style: New England-Style IPA Brewery: New Belgium ABV: 7.7%
The Beer:
At the end of the summer, New Belgium held a head-to-head challenge to find the newest Voodoo Ranger IPA. They let fans decide whether the crisp, subtly bitter Agent 77 IPA or the hazy, juicy Captain Dynamite IPA would be the newest addition.
We tried both and far preferred the juicy, sweet, crushable Captain Dynamite.
Tasting Notes:
This bold, brash, hazy beer is perfect for fans of juicy IPAs. It’s chocked full of Mosaic, Simcoe, and Cascade hops to add subtle resinous, piney flavors that pair perfectly with the juicy, tropical fruit flavors of guava, pineapple, and sweet oranges.
Bottom Line:
This limited edition was everything hazy beer IPA fans love. It’s juicy, crushable, and pleasantly sweet. A truly memorable beer.
Coping Haven is a Danish-style rye pilsner. It was brewed with golden pilsner malt, malted rye, and Moravian hops. It was made in collaboration with indie rock band Galaxie 500 to celebrate Record Store Day and the name is a play on the band’s well-known album called Copenhagen. The slick-looking can is even adorned with images from the album.
Tasting Notes:
This beer is much more than just a gimmick to celebrate Record Store Day. It’s also a refreshing, subtly sweet, well-rounded beer. The biggest problem is that it isn’t available all the time. This is the kind of beer we want to drink on a hot day, cold night, or pretty much any time… when we can get it.
Bottom Line:
Sadly, this was a limited-edition beer. Hopefully, it was popular enough to be brought back again. It was light, crisp, and perfect for sipping while listening to your favorite band.
Red Stripe — Janice Williams
Red Stripe
Style: Pale Lager Brewery: Desnoes & Geddes ABV: 4.7%
The Beer:
Since 1928 when the first batch of Red Stripe was brewed and consumed in Jamaica, the beer has been a staple of the Caribbean country enjoyed by residents, tourists and U.S. shoppers alike. There was a period of time when Red Stripe was being made in Pennsylvania, but a 2016 lawsuit (that was actually dismissed) was enough to get owners to relaunch production at the brewery in Kingston. It’s there where they’ve continued to hone in on the light and sunny, crisp taste the beer is loved for.
Tasting Notes:
This beer may be light in alcohol content but by no means is it light in flavor. Crispy stone fruit lead on the aroma and taste of this gloriously gold ale. There’s a light spritz of sweetness that blends into the background while a healthy dose of carbonation offers a stealthy, refreshing zap to the throat.
Bottom Line:
This is a perfectly balanced beer that displays a noticeable enough flavor profile while also maintaining its light and crisp nature.
Unlike everyone else on this list I really don’t like or drink beer. It’s an acquired taste, I’ve been told, but I have actively avoided putting in the reps to develop an affection for it. Give me a super sweet wine or wine cooler. Pina colada in a fish tank at a chain restaurant? My word, yes.
The one exception is when I’m at a baseball game at Camden Yards in Baltimore. There, I partake, usually in a Leinenkugel Summer Shandy with its lemonade vibes pushing back on the beer taste that I find to be so abhorrent. But, of course, there were basically no baseball games this year that I could go to. So I tried to create an imitation of the experience a couple of times, watching at home while drinking a Shandy. And while it didn’t compare to that ritual of summer that I crave (and with it the communal fun of going with friends and loved ones), that wasn’t the beer’s fault. It did its job.
Tasting Notes:
A sorta bittersweet brew for a sorta bittersweet “baseball fan in 2020” experience.
Bottom Line:
My beer of the year failed to live up to a summer tradition but it wasn’t the beer’s fault.
Brandy comes by many names, depending on where and how it’s made. Cognac, Armagnac, slivovitz, schnapps, weinbrand, applejack, and so on all denote specific types of brandy, a spirit made from grapes or fruits and often aged in oak. Finding quality brandy isn’t too hard — in part because there are so many styles to choose from. Still, like all spirits, there are a lot of factors at play and you’ll want a little guidance to find the bottle that fits your needs.
To help you navigate the wider world of brandy, we thought we’d throw together a list of our favorite bottles of brandy at every price point between $10 and $100. This project turned out to be a little harder than we thought — there are a lot of great brandy options for under $30 and then in the $30 to $60 price range as well. So picking just one bottle for each of those slots forced us to leave off some classics and quality alternatives. Alas…
The ten bottles below are brandy, Cognac, and Armagnac that we love drinking as the year comes to a close. They taste good, mix well, and will warm you up as winter 2020-2021 marches on.
This California brandy is crafted as a mixer. The juice is Sonoma wine that’s distilled and then aged for two years in American oak. The barrels are then blended and proofed for maximum mixability.
Tasting Notes:
You’re greeted with butterscotch and caramel, creating a sweet nose. The palate touches on hints of spice, oak, and dry grape while holding on to the sweetness of the base. This finish is warm and short with a hint of minerality.
Bottom Line:
If you’re whipping up a brandy old fashioned, this is the brandy to use — it’s made specifically for that cocktail.
This Cognac is beloved in brandy corners for its accessibility on the U.S. market, it’s well-rounded nature, and the very affordable price point. The juice is a straight-forward Cognac blend with no fussing, just tried and true crafting from vine to barrel to bottle.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a balanced floral note next to sweetness. The palate embraces those florals with a touch of lavender next to pears and apricots, with a velvety mouthfeel. The end is short, fruity, and holds a small touch of spicy wood.
Bottom Line:
This works as a sipper in a pinch. It really shines as a highball with some nice, fizzy water and plenty of ice.
This Armenian brandy has a heritage stretching back into the late 1800s. The juice is made from locally grown grapes from one of the oldest known grape growing regions of the world. The distillate then spends five years resting in oak before it’s blended, proofed with mountain spring water, and bottled.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a distinct Christmas cake loaded with vanilla, dried fruit, nuts, and spice on the nose. That nose delivers on the palate with the addition of plums and honey with a hint more of the spice and wood. The end is long, sweet, and full of Christmas cake boldness.
Bottom Line:
This is a surprisingly easy sipper in a snifter with a little warmth. It also makes a hell of a cocktail base for anything from eggnog to a sidecar.
Château de Laubade is a vine to glass experience in Armagnac, France. The Maison uses primarily Ugni Blanc and Folle Blanche grapes to make their spirit. The juice then goes into the barrels for anywhere from six to 12 years. The barrels are then hand-selected and small-batched with no more than 20 barrels going into a single batch.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a creamy caramel and vanilla underbelly that leads toward bright and ripe cherries. That cherry sweetness counterpoints notes of old oak and dark spice as the sweetness edges towards creamed honey. The sip is perfectly-rounded, with zero rough edges. It lingers on your sense as the sweet fruit ends slightly tart and spicy.
Bottom Line:
This is a solid sipper for $40. That being said, this is a great cocktail base at a price point that feels fair for making cocktails (think brandy Manhattans and Sazeracs)
This Spanish brandy has some serious pedigree. The juice is made from Airen grapes grown in Jerez. The juice then goes into former Pedro Ximenez sherry casks where it rests for 15 long years. The result is a deeply flavorful snifter that’s second to none.
Tasting Notes:
Roasted nuts, orange-infused dark chocolate, espresso beans, and brown bread greet you. The sip embraces the oak, nuts, and coffee as the body of the brandy feels like sharp beams of golden light flooding through darkly colored stained glass. The fruit is fairly dried and plummy and the sweetness edges ever-so-slightly towards molasses. The end is dry, bold, and leaves you warmed to your soul.
Bottom Line:
We really dig this bottle. While it’s a great sipper, this really is the ultimate base for eggnog or a Brandy Alexander. It stands up to the heavy fat of the cream while still delivering on its promised flavor notes.
This is Jay-Z’s signature brand. The juice in the bottle goes way back to Baron Otard from the famed Château de Cognac. The new line was re-crafted to suit American palates and includes a blend of Cognacs that are aged at the château for four to eight years before blending, proofing, and bottling.
Tasting Notes:
The florals and fruit take a back seat to wood, spice, and vanilla on the nose. The palate of rich caramel leads to butter toffee with plenty of that oak shining through next to mild dark spices. The end lets the florals and fruit come out to play a little as the wood, spice, and caramel fade through your senses.
Bottom Line:
This is a great workhorse Cognac. It works perfectly well in a snifter, in a highball, or as a cocktail base (especially for a sidecar or Sazerac). Plus the bottle is pretty cool, making this a solid gift bottle.
HINE Rare is a masterfully crafted Cognac. The juice is a blend of eaux-de-vie (literally water of life, really the distillate) made from wines from the Grande Champagne and Petite Champagne growing regions. That spirit then is barreled in oak where it spends six to 12 years maturing. The results are then married, proofed with soft mineral water from local springs, and bottled.
Tasting Notes:
While the oak and vanilla of a well-aged spirit are present, the real star of the show is in the fields of summer florals. The taste embraces those flowers with hints of jasmine next to violet next lavender that’s counterpointed by plummy nuttiness and more of that oaky spice.
Bottom Line:
This is a super easy-sipping Cognac that needs little help. Take your time and enjoy it after a big meal.
This high-end offering from Remy really does shine. The brandy is a blend of ultra-refined Fine Champagne Cognacs that are hand-selected and small-batched, adding a unique vibe to the expression.
Tasting Notes:
Dark red grapes mingle with sharp Christmas spices, musty oak, rich vanilla, and creamy toffee sweetness. A Christmas cake full of dried and candied fruit, spice, nuts, and buttery rum leads towards a whisper of fallow lavender fields. The end lingers just the right amount of time, touching on the fruit, spice, wood, and velvet texture.
Bottom Line:
Warm up a snifter, pour a large pour, and take your time enjoying this complex and very wintry brandy. This also works as a nice gift bottle.
This brandy from New Jersey harvests its apples from the misty Shenandoah Valley in Virginia. 30 pounds of apples go into each bottle of brandy from Laird’s. The juice then rests in American oak for 12 years before it’s blended, proofed, and bottled.
Tasting Notes:
You’re greeted with apples stewing in butter, spice, raisins, and brown sugar. Hints of vanilla and oak join the party and a sense of salted caramel arrives to drive all those stewed and spicy apples towards a nice sweet/savory feel. The end isn’t too long but leaves you with a warm apple pie vibe.
Bottom Line:
This is probably the most unique offering on the list. It’s also amazingly easy to sip. Maybe too easy. We’d also argue that this makes a sweet old fashioned, price point be damned.
Ol’ Henny is a good place to end this list. Their Master Blender’s Selection highlights the importance of blending in making Cognac and brandy in general. This brandy was created by blending spirits from the Petite Champagne region and letting them age in two different barrels. The first maturation happens in coarse-grain French oak for 18 months. The juice is then transferred to used oak for longer maturation.
The best barrels are then blended, proofed with soft spring water, and bottled.
Tasting Notes:
On the nose, this is like a mix of Christmas spices stored in a cedar barrel. The palate builds on that with a cake maltiness, dried fruit, and an almost fig savoriness. Hints of coffee bitterness kick in late as the spice edges towards peppery with a hint of vanilla.
Bottom Line:
If you dig on spicy bourbons, this is the drink for you. It’s a great sipper and always works wonders in a cocktail. It’s also a nice step up from the standard Hennessy people know and love.
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