Month: February 2021

After following up their debut album with the buzz-worthy effort Crush Crusher, Ian Sweet (aka Jilian Medford) checked into an intensive outpatient psychiatric care program, which included six hours of therapy a day. Medford took away a lot from that experience, and with their upcoming album Show Me How You Disappear, the songwriter unpacks some of her biggest lessons.

Ian Sweet previously previewed Show Me How You Disappear with a handful of singles, including “Drink The Lake” and “Sword.” Medford now returns with the euphoric and resonating track “Sing Till I Cry.”

Speaking about the single in a statement, Medford said it’s a reflection on the aftermath of trauma:

“‘Sing Till I Cry’ encapsulates the aftermath of trauma and how your innocence feels like it’s been taken away from you. You forget the simplest things, what it feels like to smile, how to see things clearly. This song prompts me to heal and rediscover that lightness of being. What gives you up? What makes you cry? What gives you love?”

About the album as a whole, Medford explained how she took a different approach to songwriting this time around. “This is the first record that I leave that space for myself,” she said. “I feel a freedom on this one that I haven’t felt with the others. People always say, ‘I put all of me into this,’ but I actually didn’t this time — I left space.”

Watch the “Sing Till I Cry” video above.

Show Me How You Disappear is out 3/5 via Polyvinyl. Pre-order it here.

There aren’t enough cheat codes in video games today. There was a time when cheat codes were one of the ultimate prizes in gaming. One of your friends would learn about one and share it amongst your friends. You would go home and try it out because you just had to know what it felt like to play god in the world of video games, or when you beat a game and it unlocked them. This way you could replay the game with these cheats and get new experiences out of them.

Unfortunately, as gaming has become more advanced we’ve had an unfortunate casualty amongst them. Cheat codes feel basically non-existent now. Sure, we have mods that act as something like user-made cheat codes, but the idea of a video game just having a code you could put in at the menu that gives you a special reward? Those are almost non-existent and it’s something lost in this generation of gaming.

Let’s go back and remember the era of cheat codes. Maybe, as more people become nostalgic for them, we’ll see a return to cheat codes someday. One can only hope.

The Konami Code

The most famous cheat code ever. The Konami Code is the code that broke through pop culture. Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A start. Unless it’s two-player mode then it’s select start. What was originally a code meant to give the player 30 lives in Contra soon started to make appearances in every game Konami made. Thus it was dubbed the “Konami code.”

What’s interesting about this code is that it became more famous for everything that happened to it afterward rather than for the original game itself. Contra was plenty hard, and some people have never beaten it without the code’s assistance, but very few call it the “Contra code” because Konami put it in so many future games. That’s how you turn a cheat code into pop culture.

Spider-Man in Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2

The first time someone saw Spider-Man skating around in Tony Hawk Pro Skater it was unbelievable. Here’s a super hero from comics just skating around doing kick flips and he even has his own tricks. How can a different licensed property be in this game?

Spider-Man being in Tony Hawk ruled because it helped pave the way for allowing games to do weird crossovers. For Tony Hawk in particular it became a tradition to put super heroes like Wolverine and Iron Man in their games from this point forward.

“God Mode” in Doom

“God Mode” was the name for the invincibility mode in Doom. This is one of those cheats that is more fun to use after the game has been beaten thousands of times over. The cheat is in reality just an invincibility mode, but players dubbed it “God Mode” because of how they felt like a god slaying the demons of hell. Doom is an at times incredibly hard game and this cheat allowed players a chance to take their revenge on the demons without fear of recourse.

The reason this cheat is important is that it inspired many other games to include a “god mode” itself. In Quake, developed by many of the same people who made Doom, they included a similar cheat where to unlock it all you to do was type in “god.” From then on invincibility and god-like power cheats became a mainstay in video games that allowed cheat codes.

Big Head Mode

NBA Jam had A LOT of cheat codes. You could play as Bill Clinton and Will Smith for example. Only one of them inspired every other game to copy it and create a cheat of their own however and that was Big Head mode.

Big Head Mode is just like the name sounds. You input the code and now everybody has a big ole head to run around with. It doesn’t actually do anything besides give everyone big heads but it’s incredibly funny to look at. Games from this point on would include their own big head modes to similar comedic effect.

Blood Code: Mortal Kombat

Mortal Kombat is infamous not just because of the gruesome fatalities and blood, but because of what happened from that. Mortal Kombat, along with an awful Sega CD game called Night Trap are the reason video games have ratings. Even before that, however, Mortal Kombat was at odds with Nintendo over the blood in their game. Nintendo was known for being the more family-friendly video game developer and they weren’t happy about a bloody game like Mortal Kombat on their system. So the developers turned the blood off.

Sort of. They sort of turned the blood off. What the developers actually did was hide the blood behind a cheat code. Input the code and the blood is back. That blood would eventually lead to the ESRB being created. Oops?

The End: Metal Gear Solid 3

This is sort of a cheat and sort of not one. The way you access this cheat isn’t by putting in a code, but rather by messing with the system clock of the very console itself.

When you reach the boss fight with “The End” you’re supposed to fight him by dodging his sniper fire, sneaking up on him, and shooting back. Unless you decide to go into the system settings, move the internal clock of your PlayStation about two weeks or so, and then start the game back up. Go find his body and you will discover The End has died of old age. Guess he didn’t have much time left on this earth anyway.

This is an incredibly silly boss fight and one of the first instances of a game breaking the norms and doing something unique. It’s not really a cheat “code” but it should definitely be considered a cheat.

Texas has been leveled by a historic winter storm that has left millions of residents without power, but Ted Cruz still decided now was a good time to visit sunny Cancun. The senator ended the trip early after facing backlash online, however (he deserves zero credit for this decision), and before landing back in Houston, he released a statement about his decision to desert the people he’s supposed to represent.

“This has been an infuriating week for Texans. The greatest state in the greatest country in the world has been without power. We have food lines, we have gas lines, and people sleeping at their neighbors’ houses. Our homes are freezing and our lights are out. Like millions of Texans, our family lost heat and power too,” Cruz wrote. That’s a good list of reasons for a politician to not take a vacation. Also, THE PANDEMIC. And yet!

“With schools canceled for the week, our girls asked us to take a trip with friends,” he continued. “Wanting to be a good dad, I flew down with them last night and am flying back this afternoon. My staff and I are in constant communication with state and local leaders to get to the bottom of what happened in Texas. We want our power back, our water on, and our homes warm. My team and I will continue using all our resources to keep Texas informed and safe.” Cruz did not apologize, but he did blame his kids.

Father of the year, senator of the year.

When most people think of Jodie Foster, they think of Clarice Starling in Silence of the Lambs or Sarah Tobias in The Accused. They think about her role in Taxi Driver opposite Robert DeNiro. Maybe they think about Nell or Panic Room or, more recently, maybe they think about Jodie Foster’s career as a director. She’s won two Oscars, and most people consider her among the best actors of her (or any) generation.

Forty years after the event, however, and not that many people think about Jodie Foster’s unfortunate association with an assassination attempt that left President Ronald Reagan and three other people wounded, including James Brady of the “Brady Bill” fame, who died of his injuries 33 years after the event. For Jodie Foster, not associating her with that event was absolutely by design.

Foster rarely if ever discusses the incident. She has, in fact, canceled interviews in the past when she knew she’d be asked about it. That is why it was such a huge surprise to hear Jodie Foster speak to the incident on this week’s WTF with Marc Maron. It’s not as though she discussed the incident at length, but she did talk about the strategy she employed to ensure that the incident wouldn’t become a permanent stain on her life and career.

For those who are unfamiliar with the incident, well, that’s the point. Nevertheless, in 1981, a man named John W. Hinckley, Jr. developed an obsession with and began stalking Jodie Foster after seeing her in Taxi Driver. Hinckley, Jr. moved to New Haven, where Foster was attending college at Yale, and then in an effort to impress her, he tried to assassinate the President of the United States.

It was a “weird moment in my life” for Foster, she told Maron, who was impressed with Foster’s ability to transcend that event in her career.

“Yes, I mean, I skillfully transcended it,” Foster said. “My mom had been a publicist, and she was very clear that she tried to guide me to make sure that I wasn’t just going to be known as the person who was involved in the shooting of the President. She said, if you want to have a career that is not about this, so you are never going to talk about it. You’ll do whatever you need to do for the court case, and then that’s it. You won’t talk about it.”

“What I did,” Foster continued, “is I wrote a piece about it for Esquire magazine … and that was it. I had written what I had to write about it, I got it out, and there was nothing more to say about it.”

That was her policy, she says, although it took some enforcement. “I’m not sure you could enforce that these days because we have a different relationship with the press now.”

“It was a weird time in history. It was a weird time for me, personally. It was a weird time for the movie business. Strange,” she added.

In the end, however, Foster says that her ability to distance herself from the “Hinckley problem” was a “testament to her mom. She was able to find a good strategy to make sure that happened.”

Source: WTF with Marc Maron

Still the most prestigious individual honor in the NBA, the MVP trophy is a piece of hardware all superstars want to have in their display case. And yet, it remains one of the more elusive of the regular season awards. Only one player can win it each season, the competition is always stiff, and, quite often, the same names dominate the MVP conversation.

Add to that the somewhat nebulous criteria voters use to determine their picks, and it’s hard to pin down exactly what it takes to secure the trophy. Is it the best player on the best team that season? Is it the player with the most impressive individual stats? How much does team success factor into it? Is it the player who is the consensus pick for best player on the planet at that particular moment?

We’ve never quite been able to nail this down, and when you start looking at some of the winners below, you’ll see just how finicky some of this stuff can get. Regardless, we’ve attempted the even murkier task of ranking the MVPs of the last decade in order of greatness.

Many factors came into play: stats, narrative, lasting influence, thrill factor, subjective taste, etc. But one thing is for certain, each was great and deserving in their own right.

11. Derrick Rose (2011)

One of the more controversial MVP picks of the last decade, Rose’s MVP season now stands mostly as a monument to what might have been. The interim years haven’t been terribly kind, but his breakout season in Chicago made him the youngest player ever to receive the award, a testament the sheer electricity he brought to NBA arenas on a nightly basis with his explosive athleticism, ball-handling wizardry, and dazzling finishes at the rim.

But Rose also, undoubtedly, had narrative on his side. LeBron had won the award two seasons in a row, and it’s difficult ignore the role that voter fatigue played here, combined with the fallout from The Decision, and the eagerness with which many were ready to anoint anyone but the King. As the league’s fresh-faced young star, Rose made the perfect heir apparent. Regardless of where you stand on it, it’s an impressive feat.

Season: 25.5 points per game, 7.7 assists per game, 4.1 rebounds per game, 1 steal per game, 44.5 percent shooting

10-9. Giannis Antetokounmpo

In an era when shooting is at such a premium, Giannis (ahem) bucked the system to remind us that there’s more to basketball than just the long ball. The Greek Freak’s career trajectory had been on a sharp incline since he entered the league as a lanky 19-year-old, and by the 2019 season, Giannis was virtually unstoppable as he led Milwaukee to a league-leading 60-win season.

At 6’11, Giannis has a very different game from Kevin Durant, but the speed and agility they both have at that size defies all logic. By the 2019 season, Giannis had figured out how to put most of the pieces together, scoring at will and defending at such a high level that it transformed him into a perennial Defensive Player of the Year candidate, an award he would win the following season.

It’s probably unfair for the purposes of this ranking, but it’s hard to separate his regular-season success from his postseason shortfalls, which have become a sort of retroactive referendum on the parts of his game where there is still plenty of room for growth.

Season (2019): 27.7 points per game, 12.5 rebounds per game, 5.9 assists per game, 1.5 blocks per game, 1.3 steals per game, 57.8 percent shooting

Season (2020): 29.5 points per game, 13.6 rebounds per game, 5.6 assists per game, 1 steal per game, 1 block per game, 54.4 percent shooting

8. LeBron James (2012)

LeBron claims he didn’t leave his bedroom for two weeks after losing to the Mavs in the 2011 Finals. But it was ultimately that dark night of the soul that led him and the Heat back out on the warpath again the following season to atone for their shortcomings.

That’s exactly what they did, and a major catalyst for that was LeBron’s willingness to finally embrace top dog status in the Heat pecking order. After the confusion and uncertainty of trying to defer to Wade and Bosh at times the previous season and achieve an unattainable equilibrium, his return to MVP status clarified the Heat’s identity and put them on the path to their first championship together.

Season: 27.1 points per game, 7.9 rebounds per game, 6.2 assists per game, 1.9 steals per game, 0.8 blocks per game, 53.1 percent shooting

7. James Harden (2018)

Russell Westbrook’s historic stat lines overshadowed Harden’s own accomplishments the previous season, but to be clear, there was a small but vocal contingent of pundits who believed Harden was more deserving of the award that year, and the Beard certainly benefited from this line of thinking the following season.

That’s not to say Harden was undeserving. If Westbrook had taken his game to a statistical extreme, Harden had embarked on a different kind of data-driven quest for glory behind the Morey-D’Antoni Rockets, who had effectively stripped the game down to a math equation. Harden’s monk-like commitment to threes, layups, and free throws turned him into the league’s most unstoppable offensive force, and one of its most polarizing figures.

Season: 30.4 points per game, 8.8 assists per game, 5.4 rebounds per game, 1.8 steals per game, 44.9 percent shooting, 36.7 percent three-point shooting, 85.8 percent free throw shooting

6. Kevin Durant (2014)

This one gets bumped up a few notches strictly for his unforgettable acceptance speech, during which a tearful Durant used his nationally-televised platform to honor his mother for all the sacrifices she made that helped him achieve his dreams. We’re getting misty again just thinking about it.

On the court, this was Durant in full possession of his powers, a 6’11 scoring machine who was lethal from anywhere on the court and whose efficiency elevated him above the other great scorers of the past. Durant’s length made his jump shot un-guardable, and combined with the speed and ball-handling of point guards that are a full foot shorter than him, it made him an all-around offensive threat the likes of which we’d never seen.

Season: 32 points per game, 7.4 rebounds per game, 5.5 assists per game, 1.3 steals per game, 50.3 percent shooting, 39.1 percent three-point shooting, 87.3 percent free throw shooting

5. LeBron James (2010)

LeBron’s final season in Cleveland (the first time around) was no less remarkable for how he carried a subpar team to a 61-win season. It would end in heartbreak, of course, at the hands of the Celtics, a perpetual thorn in LeBron’s side in the early days of his career with the Cavs.

Despite his incredible play and their regular season success, it stands as a testament to the folly of relying on a single player to do it all, especially when it comes to the gauntlet that is the postseason. It was a lesson sorely learned by the Cavs front office and ownership. LeBron finally reached the end of his rope this season, and the gaudy MVP numbers are proof-positive that he’d done everything in his power to lead his team to the promised land.

Season: 29.7 points per game, 8.6 assists per game, 7.3 rebounds per game, 1.6 steals per game, 1 block per game, 50.3 percent shooting

4. Steph Curry (2015)

The 2015 version of Steph Curry was just beginning to open our eyes to what was to come. The three-point revolution was upon us, and who better to lead it than the precocious point guard from Davidson who flew under so many people’s radars right up to the point that he changed basketball forever.

Of course, the raw numbers don’t compare to what he would do the following season, but all the seeds were already planted: his ability to embarrass defenders off the dribble, his gloriously-reckless shot-selection, and the unapologetic swagger that accompanied it all. And come to find out, it was all just an appetizer for the main course that followed.

Season: 23.8 points per game, 7.7 assists per game, 4.3 rebounds per game, 2 steals per game, 48.7 percent shooting, 44.3 percent three-point shooting, 91.4 percent free throw shooting

3. Russell Westbrook (2017)

Oscar Robertson averaging a triple-double for an entire year was, quite simply, one of the greatest statistical feats in basketball history. Few believed it was possible in the modern NBA … right up until Westbrook did it. But it’s impossible to fully process how it came to be without putting it in its proper context and understanding what fueled it.

OKC had blown a 3-1 lead to the Warriors the previous season, and adding insult to injury, Durant opted to leave in free agency to join that very Warriors team. Somehow, Westbrook was able to channel all that frustration and competitive fire into his game on a nightly basis, and the result was one mind-boggling triple-double after another.

Westbrook approached each game with a level of fury we might never see again. It was the Anger of Achilles in basketball form, and it was an extraordinary thing to watch.

Season: 31.6 points per game, 10.7 rebounds per game, 10.4 assists per game, 1.6 steals per game

2. LeBron James (2013)

This was LeBron at his absolute most terrifying. Fresh off his first championship, the enormous weight of expectation had lifted, and LeBron played with a joy and freedom not seen since his early days in Cleveland. Not only that, he’d taken his game to the next level in several categories.

Seemingly overnight, LeBron had figured out how to effectively use his size and strength to dominate defenders in the post and had become a reliable three-point threat. Behind his otherworldly play, the Heat rattled off 27-straight wins during one stretch of that season en route to their second-straight title.

The other part that often gets overlooked here is that LeBron fell just one vote shy of becoming the first-ever unanimous MVP, a distinction that would eventually go to the next player on this list.

Season: 26.8 points per game, 8 rebounds per game, 7.3 assists per game, 1.7 steals per game, 0.9 blocks per game, 56.5 percent shooting, 40.6 percent three-point shooting

1. Steph Curry (2016)

There’s no reason to overthink this. Building off his first championship and first MVP award, Curry’s 2016 campaign will go down as one of the best of all-time, not just of the past decade. In the process, he seized the crown as the undisputed greatest shooter in NBA history.

The Warriors were like touring rock stars that season, with hordes of fans flocking to arenas early to try and catch a glimpse of Curry’s warm-up routine, which was going viral on an almost nightly basis. During games, he would demoralize teams with scoring outbursts, going off for 20-plus point quarters or knocking down back-to-back-to-back three-pointers from long-range.

Nobody had ever taken such a high volume of threes, with added degrees of difficulty, and made them with such efficiency. And his influence on the game is virtually immeasurable. It’s not an overstatement to say he’s helped change the way basketball is played around the world, and the ripple effects from that 2016 season will be felt for years to come.

Season: 30.1 points per game, 6.7 assists per game, 5.4 rebounds per game, 2.1 steals per game, 50.4 percent shooting, 45.4 percent three-point shooting, 90.8 percent free throw shooting

The Blossom, moniker of LA-based songwriter Lily Lizotte, earned a reputation for their anti-pop sound with a handful of singles released in 2020. Now, Lizotte announces that they’re gearing up for the release of their debut EP with the spirited single “Hardcore Happy.”

Sharing a self-directed video alongside the single, Lizotte visualizes the poignant feeling of being stuck. It opens with the singer buried underneath the dirt before transitioning to a clip of them trapped behind broken glass. All the while, Lizotte delivers relatable lyrics about feeling overwhelmed: “Yeah, you know my world is burnin’ / I’ve been sick of all my hurtin’ / Yeah, I’m tired of my gender / I spent five days on a bender.”

While their debut EP, 97 Blossom is about insecurity, gender dysphoria, and anxiety as a whole, Lizotte says they penned “Hardcore Happy” specifically about coping with difficult but necessary growing pains:

“‘Hardcore Happy’ is all my chaos in the form of a strong warm hug. Growing pains, the aches, while I’m closing my eyes and running towards change. Counting days in my sleep and hoping for something more. When someone asks me what it’s about I say, ‘Everything I am and everything I wish I was. It’s a hybrid of everything I’m influenced by sonically and emotionally. A collage I made with friends.’”

Watch The Blossom’s “Hardcore Happy” video above.

97 Blossom is out 4/6. Pre-order it here.

When it comes to pizza, I’m a big lover of the classics. A pepperoni, a fresh Margherita, a good ‘ol four cheese — maybe I’ll get a little wild and opt for something like prosciutto and mushrooms. Point is, I like to keep my pies simple, saving all my snobbery for the sourcing of the ingredients, rather than the clever composition of the pizza itself.

As such, I’ve never been a fan of frozen pizzas, which certainly don’t feel “local” and often seem to have superfluous toppings. Plus, why bother when making your own pizza dough is so damn easy?

But recently, I’ve changed my tune… a little. Frozen pizzas — like all frozen meals, really — have upped their respective games considerably over the past half-decade. And while they’ll never beat the real deal, made fresh, the chasm between those two camps is a little narrower than it once was. Making convenience more of a factor.

Did you have 20 Zoom calls in a single day? Might be a good time to opt for a frozen pizza rather than covering your countertop with flour. You get the idea.

Over the past month, I’ve been on a quest to discover which frozen pizzas are doing it right and which are dragging the whole genre down. So here they are, best grocery store frozen pepperoni pizzas, ranked from worst to best.* Why pepperoni? Because if your company can’t make something as simple as pepperoni work, then your other pizzas truly have no hope.

*You won’t see Trader Joes on this list, it exists in its own ecosystem with its own ranking on the way.

12. Totino’s Triple Pepperoni Party Pizza

Price: $1.36

Oh, boy. See, Totino’s tastes exactly like what a pizza snob would assume frozen pizza tastes like: terrible. A cracker crust with overly bright but ultimately bland tomato sauce and the lowest budget mozzarella on Earth. This pie burns up brown, but its most offensive feature is easily the pepperoni chunks this pizza is topped with. They’re virtually flavorless, offering little more than texture.

For a pie that advertises itself as having “Triple Pepperoni” the low quality and lack of pepperoni is almost astounding. I’ve never been more offended by a frozen meal.

The Bottom Line

The saddest party ever.

11. Cali’flour Foods Uncured Chicken Pepperoni

Price: $48 (for 4 pack)

Cauliflower pizza is not for everyone, so you shouldn’t be too surprised to find this one ranked so low. The ingredients on this chicken pepperoni pizza are a decent quality, with flavorful pepperoni and mozzarella that melts decently on the cauliflower crust, but… we’re just not sold on the crust.

Once cooked the pizza gives off a noticeable cauliflower smell, and the crust doesn’t really hold up the slice when battling against the weight of itself. This is really more of a knife and fork pizza. That said, if you’re looking for a gluten-free pizza made with few ingredients, this might be your jam.

The Bottom Line

It has its audience, but a cauliflower pie was never going to rank well against traditional crusts.

10. Red Baron Stuffed Crust Pepperoni Pizza

Price: $6.78

Alright, cool we get Stuffed Crust here. The cheese is decent with a nice melt but it wouldn’t have hurt Red Baron to add a bit more. We know we’re getting cheese in the crust, but when you’ve signed on to eating stuffed crust pizza you’re expecting an overly cheesy experience. This pie doesn’t quite deliver that, but you get the novelty of having crust stuffed with cheese which is great because as far as crusts go, Red Baron doesn’t exactly have our favorite.

Don’t expect Pizza Hut stuffed crust levels here, the bar of mozzarella cheese in the crust is a lot less indulgent than that. The thick hearty pepperonis have a nice peppery bite to them and the sauce has a noticeable garlic edge to it. We’d like a lot more cheese to bump this up in the ranking though.

The Bottom Line

If you’re going to get Red Baron at all, get their Stuffed Crust.

9. Whole Foods 365 Thin Crust Pepperoni Pizza

Price: $4.99

I gotta say, I expected better from Whole Foods. I shouldn’t have, as this is Whole Foods 365 and the actual Whole Foods probably has a pre-made non-frozen pizza chilling in the fresh food section for double the price. Plus they make fantastic pizzas fresh in many of their stores. That said, we’re not sure why anyone would bother actually buying this. But I did, for science!

The pepperoni and mozzarella are decent, the crust is a bit too cracker-like and flavorless for my liking and the sauce is really bland, despite having a zesty tomato smell. I might be harshly judging this one because my expectations were higher, but ultimately I have fonder memories of eating every pizza the follows this one, so the low spot feels justified.

The Bottom Line

Way too expensive for what it is, avoid this one on principle alone.

8. Tony’s Pepperoni Pizza

Price: $2.98

Tony’s Pepperoni Pizza being ranked higher than Whole Foods 365 says less about Tony’s than it does about Whole Foods (we really feel burned by that pie). Tony’s is easily the most suspicious pizza I’ve ever eaten. On the box, it is advertised as having “pizzeria-style crust” and touts that it is made with 100% real mozzarella cheese — as if you’d expect anything less.

The very fact that Tony’s feels the need to mention all of this (plus “sauce made from real tomatoes”) makes it feel like they’re trying to lie to us. Yet, I found this pizza to be… kind of good? You know, in that guilty pleasure way. I can’t point to a single ingredient that I like, it’s incredibly greasy, that cheese is not nearly as abundant or stretchy as the box photo would suggest, and the crust, while thankfully not cracker-esque, is a bit soggier than it should be…

But damn it, when it all comes together in the mouth, it’s pretty good.

The Bottom Line

I like it, but not enough to buy or ever admit as much in face-to-face conversation.

7. Tombstone Pepperoni

Price: $3.97

This one doesn’t even come in a box, so I went in expecting the worst. I was wrong, Tombstone, while not great, is pretty damn good for what it is — a cheap-as-hell frozen pizza. The cheese is decent, with a nice melt that, once out of the oven, actually manages to cover the entire surface of the pie. The crust here has a nice chew to it with the cornice delivering a decent crunch.

Alas, overall the thing is a bit too soft in the sections that hold the toppings. Also, the pepperoni is a little too thick and doesn’t crisp up very well, instead, you’re left with some floppy greasy meat. While I judged this pizza a little too harshly on its appearance, I found that the box-less packaging was actually overall my favorite. Once you start stocking up on frozen pizzas you realize those things take up a lot of space!

The Bottom Line

Why have pizza in a box when you can have pizza in a plastic wrapper?

6. DiGiorno Rising Crust Pepperoni Pizza

Price: $5.49

DiGiorno has this weird reputation of being the “good” frozen pizza, but I think that’s been totally influenced by its own marketing material. Through repetition of the brand’s famous tagline — “It’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno” — the idea that this frozen pizza is special has managed to ingrain itself deep within the recesses of our minds, reverberating from commercials viewed long ago in the waiting areas of muffler shops and dentist offices — the phrase repeating like an incantation slowly turning into some collective “truth” we all just mindlessly subscribe to.

I guess I kind of get where DiGiorno is coming from with their bold claim, though. Unlike a lot of the pizzas on this list, DiGiorno’s Rising Crust Pizza is thick, fluffy, and more akin to something you might pick up from your corner pizza spot. But it’s far from being the best that frozen pizza has to offer. You’re still getting part-skim mozzarella here, the pepperonis, while tasty, are a bit too thick, and the bread is on the overly sweet side.

The Bottom Line

This is far from being the best frozen pizza on the market, like you’ve been led to believe. But it’s solid.

5. Newman’s Own Thin & Crispy Uncured Pepperoni

Price: $5.99

One thing you’ll notice about a lot of frozen pepperoni pizzas is that the pepperoni is made with a blend of pork, beef, and chicken. There is nothing wrong with this, but you’ll find that the best-tasting pepperoni out there is usually a pork and beef blend, Newman’s Own goes this route and their pepperonis are better for it.

It’s a good thing that the pepperonis are good, because for being such a small pizza, this one has a lot of it. The crust is cracker thin with a decent chew, giving it a flatbread-like bite, but we’d have liked to see more sauce and cheese on this one. The lack of sauce and cheese makes it so that the crust gets a little too crispy from the heat of the oven.

The Bottom Line

Great for pepperoni snobs, but because of its thin sauce layer and lack of cheese you’re going to have to keep an eye on this one to make sure it doesn’t cook for a second longer than it’s supposed to.

4. DiGiorno Pepperoni Croissant Crust

Price: $6.19

All right, so I’m reviewing two different DiGiorno pizzas in this ranking, which kind of goes against my self-imposed “no brand repeats” rule but I couldn’t talk about DiGiorno’s croissant crust and just ignore DiGiorno’s rising crust version, it’s part of their brand identity! The croissant crust is superior in every way to the OG rising crust, with flaky layers of crust that crumble in your mouth in buttery bliss.

The sauce, mozzarella, and cheese taste exactly like what’s on the rising crust, but the sweetness of that doughy crust is swapped here for butter, which marries the flavors together much better.

The Bottom Line

Croissant crust sounds like a novelty, but it’s DiGiorno’s greatest contribution to the frozen pizza space.

3. California Pizza Kitchen Crispy Thin Crust Signature Uncured Pepperoni

Price: $6.19

Putting the words “Signature Uncured Pepperoni” in the actual title of your product seems insane to me. Yo CPK, your name, and logo are already on the box, we’re not over here thinking you’re borrowing your pepperoni from someplace else.

Stupid name aside, this pizza has a lot going for it. The marinara sauce is ultimately forgettable but the chunks of vine-ripened tomatoes really give this pie a tremendous burst of flavor, making up for what the sauce lacks. The mozzarella melts nicely and has an added boost of flavor thanks to the blend of Fontina and smoked gouda which spreads its way across the entire pie. The pepperoni has a spicy bite and manages to crisp up nicely (though it produces a lot of grease) but it’s the sprinkling of basil that really brings things together for me.

The Bottom Line

A strong choice with great ingredients. Cheese lovers will appreciate the blend of mozzarella, fontina, and gouda.

2. Freschetta Naturally Rising Pepperoni

Price: $4.98

I’ve tried all of Freschetta’s crusts at this point but if I had to choose just one it would have to be the brand’s Naturally Rising line. The dough here is good, it’s not overly sweet, and thanks to a brushing of garlic it’s very flavorful, with a nice chew that feels more in line with what you’d expect from an actual non-frozen pizza. You don’t get the complexity of CPK’s three cheese blend, but the mix of mozzarella and provolone is a classic pizzeria combination, so it’s hard to be mad at Freschetta — few frozen pizza brands even bother with two kinds of cheese!

My only major gripe here is the pepperoni isn’t the best, I love the way it crisps up but the flavor is just a little too dull. The sauce and bread are great though, for the price Freschetta is one of your best options.

The Bottom Line

A frozen pizza you’ll actually enjoy eating the crust of. Freschetta has mastered the frozen pizza crust game, just add a sprinkling of your own oregano and some fresh diced tomatoes and you have one of the best tasting and cheapest frozen pizzas out there.

1. Screamin’ Sicilian Holy Pepperoni

Price: $5.98

This is the frozen pizza people kept telling me I “had to try” and it really lives up to its reputation. It easily rises above every other frozen pizza on this list and — to be frank — there’s quite a gap between our number two and number one. While a blind taste test wouldn’t fool anyone into believing it was an actual pizza that someone delivered, the bread does have the texture of perfectly reheated leftover pie.

If you told someone this was reheated pizza slice from a local pizza joint, they’d believe you! That’s progress for frozen pizzas!

The pepperoni on this pie is great, it’s thick-cut, which I don’t usually like, but has such a savory peppery flavor. The sauce is bright and present — like what you want on a pizza — with a salty blend of mozzarella, parmesan, and Romano cheeses. It’s legit, high-quality cheese (for a frozen pizza).

The Bottom Line

Lives up to its revered reputation. A foldable, delicious pie that is truly worthy of the freezer space it occupies. While we wouldn’t take this over a slice at our neighborhood pizza spot, we’d likely pick it over what the big national pizza chains have to offer.

Ted Cruz is getting roasted on social media after new information about his ill-timed and tone-deaf trip to Cancun has emerged. According to ABC News’ Ben Siegel, Cruz reportedly demanded a police escort at the airport while he left millions of Texans stranded in freezing weather without water or electricity following a historic winter storm that’s crippled the state. Needless to say, news of Cruz pulling first responders away from helping citizens so officers can facilitate his luxury vacation to sunny Mexico did not sit well, and the heated reactions already coming fast on social media where Cruz was already getting dragged for the Cancun trip. He’s reportedly attempting to fly back to Texas on Thursday afternoon, but as you can see, the damage is already done, and it’s only getting worse as more damning details emerge.

On top of the terrible optics of tying up emergency resources for his Cancun trip, Cruz is also getting dragged for relying on cops for his own safety after showing little concern for the Capitol Police officers who died during the January 6 insurrection that Cruz helped stir up by attending Donald Trump’s “Stop the Steal” rally. (He was notably blasted by Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez who publicly refused to work with Cruz on investigating the GameStop stocks situation thanks to his support of the rioters who tried to murder her.)

Not even thirty minutes before the police escort news broke, Cruz was getting roasted by Seth Rogen who has a long and hilarious history of repeatedly dunking on Cruz on Twitter. With Cruz due back in Texas later this afternoon where he’ll presumably address his controversial trip to Cancun, it sure sounds like the Texas senator is in for a long day of being torn apart by angry constituents.

(Via Ben Siegel on Twitter)

After its partnership with Travis Scott turned out to be a runaway success, McDonald’s has turned to one of Scott’s partners for its next high-profile team-up. Billboard reports that the latest musician to receive his own McDonald’s meal-and-merch combo is Tay Keith, the producer who contributed such monster hits to hip-hop’s discography as Scott’s “Sicko Mode,” Drake’s “Nonstop,” and Lil Nas X’s “Holiday.”

This time around, the drop is decidedly lower key than the ones for Scott and J. Balvin and timed to promote the release of the new Crispy Chicken sandwich. Along with a cool tan-and-white hoodie emblazoned with a digital waveform down the sleeve, McDonald’s also offered a 7″ record of Keith’s new song promoting the Crispy Chicken. While both are currently sold out, McDonald’s did restock many of the Travis Scott offerings throughout the course of his promotion, so temporarily bookmarking CHKNDrop.com probably wouldn’t be the worst idea.

Unfortunately, Balvin fans were disappointed to find out that supply issues forced the cancelation of his merch run. Although fans were refunded and didn’t walk away empty-handed, it had to sting missing out on those cheeseburger house slippers.

The new Crispy Chicken — and Tay Keith’s musical ode to the treat — officially releases on Friday, February 19.

While Ted Cruz has fled the state of Texas amid the fallout from a climate disaster, Elon Musk is left behind and furious about the condition of the state’s electrical grid that still has hundreds of thousands of people without power. A winter storm has wreaked havoc on Texas and its privately-ran electrical system, as freezing temperatures, broken pipes and other infrastructure nightmares causing people to be without both water and power in some regions of the state.

It’s why people are so mad about Cruz flying to Cancun with his family, seemingly taking a vacation in the middle of a dangerous disaster for his constitutes. But Elon Musk is also worried about businesses, especially after he made it clear he wants to do business in Austin. And he tweeted that the company behind the power grid, ERCOT, is “not earning that R.”

According to CNN, Musk officially moved from California to Austin in 2020 after a dispute with the state about coronavirus safety. And he’s currently building a Tesla factory in Texas, which is currently struggling with the crisis that has left the privately-maintained power grid in a state of failure for days. That story also has some reports of people sleeping in their Teslas in Texas to stay warm.

Meanwhile, Musk continues to post memes and about meme cryptocurrency Dogecoin, though he did retweet an image of a snowy Tesla factory in Texas as well.