Month: December 2021

Rex Ryan’s, uh, appreciation of feet has long been a running joke among NFL fans, and on Monday, the former coach turned ESPN analyst decided to steer into the skid with an incredibly well-timed joke that had Dan Orlovsky, Mike Greenberg, and Ryan Clark rolling.

After the Packers’ beatdown of the Bears on Sunday Night Football, there was plenty of discussion of Rodgers’ fractured toe, which he said could require surgery if it got stepped on and worsened. Ryan was asked about the level of concern he’d have about Rodgers’ toe if he were the Packers, and he proclaimed himself a “toe expert,” insisting Rodgers’ toe is just fine given how well he’s playing, causing Orlovsky and Greeny to struggle to stifle their laughter, while Clark straight up walked off the set.

I like to believe Ryan has been waiting years to get a chance to make this joke about being a foot/toe expert and when Greeny teed him up, he absolutely smashed it out of the park. Clark’s reaction is sensational, as he simply couldn’t sit through that, and returns to the desk with a quip of his own that he doesn’t know how he can put his “best foot forward” sitting next to Rex.

Halo Infinite is supposed to be a story about a heroic soldier rescuing everyone when he is needed most. Master Chief is the ultimate spartan. A hero of earth and the world’s greatest protector from threats like the Covenant, the Forerunners, and now the Banished. When the Zeta Halo was taken over by the Banished, the UNSC was decimated in the process and it seemed like all hope was lost until Master Chief returned. With him they had hope. They had a chance at survival.

So why is it that these same soldiers who so willingly looked to Master Chief for guidance are also willingly throwing their lives away to stand beneath falling vehicles? Every player in Halo Infinite has a story at this point. They reach a FOB, call in a vehicle, and then watch as one of the USNC Marines standing at the FOB mindlessly stand in the drop area waiting for a swift death via a falling vehicle. The only question we have is why?

It’s not like the Pelican flying in is catching anyone off guard! It’s very loud, impossible to miss, and it’s carrying a giant vehicle. Nobody should be able to ignore that this ship is clearly dropping in a vehicle for Master Chief’s use and yet they continue to stand in harm’s way. Some even choose to jump into harm’s way!

At this point, the only thing that Master Chief can do is protect these hopeless Marines from any further damage. He can push them out of the way or use the fact that he is more powerful to take the brunt of the damage. Maybe that’s the true lesson in all of this? Master Chief must protect these Marines at all cost, because without them they really are hopeless. He is the ultimate shield.

That or maybe they aren’t that bright.

The news that Mehmet Oz, the “liar” better known as Dr. Oz, is running for Senate in Pennsylvania was met with groans and confusion last week. But the “serial testicle fondler” is taking his campaign seriously enough that he’s ending his successful daytime talk show. The final episode of The Dr. Oz Show — which has won nine Emmys since it started airing in September 2009 — will be on January 14, 2022. It will be replaced by cooking show The Good Dish, a The Dr. Oz Show spinoff hosted by Daphne Oz, Gail Simmons, and Jamika Pessoa, beginning January 17.

Even before the official announcement, The Dr. Oz Show was being pulled from certain markets due to Federal Communications Commission regulations.

Television stations in Cleveland, New York City, and Philadelphia announced Wednesday that they are going to stop airing the The Dr. Oz Show, citing the Federal Communications Commission’s “equal time” rules regarding political campaigns… Under the FCC rule, candidates have a right to request equivalent air time as their competitors, which the stations said could be violated if they continued to air the show hosted by Oz.

Now what will people in Cleveland, New York City, and Philadelphia — and as of mid-January, all other markets in the U.S. — stare at while waiting for the mechanic to finish inspecting their car? Besides literally every other sterile daytime talk show.

(Via Variety and Newsweek)

Billie Eilish has a lot going on so far this morning. Her and Finneas’ No Time To Die song was just nominated for a Golden Globe, and she also guested on The Howard Stern Show. On the program, she revealed that she had COVID-19 in August. Furthermore, she believes that if she wasn’t vaccinated, she would have “died.”

Eilish told Stern:

‘F*ck that sh*t, dude. It was bad. I didn’t die, and I wasn’t gonna die, but that does not take away from how miserable it was. It was terrible. I still have side effects, I was sick for, like, two months almost. This was in August, a couple months ago. […] I want it to be clear that it is because of the vaccine I’m fine. I think if I weren’t vaccinated, I would have, like, died, because it was bad. When I say it was bad, I more just mean that it felt horrible. But really, in the scheme of COVID, it was not bad. You know what I mean? When you’re sick, you feel f*cking horrible. […] The vaccine is f*cking amazing and it also saved Finneas from getting, it saved my parents from getting it, saved my friends from getting it.”

This conversation came up because Stern noticed that Eilish had a cough. He jokingly got mad at Saturday Night Live for getting Eilish sick (since she’s fresh off hosting the show) and Eilish responded, “Can I tell you a secret? Lorne [Michaels] was sick, coughing everywhere.”

In a very surprise move given his seemingly non-stop parade of controversies thanks to his practically Trumpian levels of tweeting whatever random reaction pops into his head, Elon Musk has been named 2021’s TIME Person of the Year. It’s a head-scratching choice, to be sure. Especially considering TIME actually makes it a point to bring up Musk’s penchant for tweeting about bodily functions.

Just check out this introductory paragraph from Musk’s Person of the Year feature:

The richest man in the world does not own a house and has recently been selling off his fortune. He tosses satellites into orbit and harnesses the sun; he drives a car he created that uses no gas and barely needs a driver. With a flick of his finger, the stock market soars or swoons. An army of devotees hangs on his every utterance. He dreams of Mars as he bestrides Earth, square-jawed and indomitable. Lately, Elon Musk also likes to live-tweet his poops.

Naturally, social media erupted after finding out that Musk was being honored as the Person of the Year given the wide availability of options who don’t tweet at United States senators about their penises when asked to pay their fair share of taxes. TIME magazine certainly made a choice, and people had lots of thoughts about it:

While there’s more where that came from, The Daily Show entered the fray with a scorching hot burn:

Just to drive home the fact that Musk’s Twitter activity has reached Trump-like levels, the Tesla CEO has now reached the point where no matter what happens to him, there’s always a tweet. Case in point:

(Via TIME)

The Philadelphia 76ers have managed to tread water so far this season despite a number of absences at different times due to injuries and COVID protocols, currently sitting at 15-12, tied for sixth in the East. Joel Embiid has been as dominant as ever, and Seth Curry is enjoying the best season of his career, breaking out as more than just a shooter.

However, there is a ceiling on this team as of now because they are operating without an All-Star in Ben Simmons, who continues to sit out as he awaits a trade. After insisting he would let this drag out for years, Sixers president Daryl Morey seems to be recognizing that’s not good business when you have one of the best players in the NBA in the midst of his prime, and reports have emerged this last week that Philly is being more proactive in seeking out a Simmons trade, including trying to work the phones to create a multi-team deal that could create a more enticing package for all parties.

On Monday, Shams Charania offered a report with some new teams attached to Simmons trade talks, including the Knicks and Lakers alongside a few teams that have been connected to Simmons for months.

The New York Knicks, Los Angeles Lakers, Minnesota Timberwolves, Portland Trail Blazers, Sacramento Kings, Indiana Pacers and Cleveland Cavaliers are among the teams interested in Simmons, sources said, although it’s unclear how much traction Philadelphia truly has on any move.

It’s hard to see how a team like the Lakers could truly get in the mix for Simmons, given they don’t exactly have much in the way of assets or star level talent that’d be of interest to the Sixers — unless Philly has a very different opinion of Russell Westbrook’s fit there than I am assuming. The Knicks, likewise, don’t have a ton of star-level talent on the roster, but do have more draft capital to throw around than L.A. and that might be able to get them in a three-teamer with someone like Indiana.

Whatever the case, it seems that after a couple months of posturing, the Sixers are at least being more active in trying to get talks going and seeing if they can get someone to offer a trade package that at least comes close to their hefty asking price. They have two months before the deadline to find that deal, and while the expectation should probably be for this to drag out to early February, it’s smart to engage teams now and try to create a stronger market for Simmons, particularly at a time where there are more teams that still believe they could be a contender with how muddied the playoff races are in both conferences.

Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore has a lot working against it: the J.K. Rowling connection, the indifferent critical and commercial response to Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald, the fact that a film series with “Fantastic Beasts” in the title often forgets to include any actual fantastic beasts. We just want Pokémon Snap with wizards, is that too much to ask? All that being said, The Secrets of Dumbledore also has Jude Law and Mads Mikkelsen (filling in for Johnny Depp in an all-time upgrade) casting spells at each other, so I will see it opening weekend.

Here’s the official plot summary:

Professor Albus Dumbledore (Law) knows the powerful Dark wizard Gellert Grindelwald (Mikkelsen) is moving to seize control of the wizarding world. Unable to stop him alone, he entrusts Magizoologist Newt Scamander (Eddie Redmayne) to lead an intrepid team of wizards, witches and one brave Muggle baker on a dangerous mission, where they encounter old and new beasts and clash with Grindelwald’s growing legion of followers. But with the stakes so high, how long can Dumbledore remain on the sidelines?

Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore, which also stars Katherine Waterston, Dan Fogler, Alison Sudol, Ezra Miller, Callum Turner, William Nadylam, Poppy Corby-Tuech, and Jessica Williams with a screenplay from Rowling and Steve Kloves, opens on April 15, 2022.

Keeping up with new music can be exhausting, even impossible. From the weekly album releases to standalone singles dropping on a daily basis, the amount of music is so vast it’s easy for something to slip through the cracks. Even following along with the Uproxx recommendations on a daily basis can be a lot to ask, so every Monday we’re offering up this rundown of the best new music this week.

This week saw Juice WRLD continue to expand his posthumous discography and Roddy Ricch launch a new era. Yeah, it was a great week for new music. Check out the highlights below.

For more music recommendations, check out our Listen To This section, as well as our Indie Mixtape and Pop Life newsletters.

Juice WRLD — “Girl Of My Dreams” With Suga and BTS

It’s been almost two years since the untimely death of Juice WRLD, but in the time since then, the rapper has been as prolific as any of his peers. He’s fresh off the release of his second posthumous album, Fighting Demons, and as has been the case with his posthumous work, there are some big-time collaborators involved, including an appearance from BTS’ Suga on the moody “Girl Of My Dreams.”

Roddy Ricch — “Live Life Fast (Intro)”

Roddy Ricch loves the end of the year, after all the yearly best-of lists have been released: His debut album, Please Excuse Me For Being Antisocial, dropped in December 2019, and now its follow-up, Live Life Fast, arrives this week. He teased it a few days ago by dropping a short film for the album-opening title track, a cinematic spoken-word number that sees Ricch reflecting on life and its meaning.

Tame Impala — “No Choice”

On stage is one of the places where Kevin Parker is most comfortable, so he’s surely thrilled that he’s heading out on tour early next year. He shared that news last week, and at the time, he also dropped a new B-side, “No Choice.” Uproxx’s Carolyn Droke notes of the track, “a swirling electric guitar bends and melts over intricate percussion as Kevin Parker’s drowned-out vocals ask big questions about choice, freedom, and purpose.”

Earl Sweatshirt — “Tabula Rasa” Feat. Armand Hammer

Earl Sweatshirt is somebody you don’t necessarily hear from a lot when he’s not actively promoting new material. Well, his name has been popping up lately, and thankfully, that means he has a new project, Sick, on the way. The album is dropping in January and he previewed it last week with the lead single, a soulful, The Alchemist-produced, Armand Hammer-featuring number called “Tabula Rasa.”

Beach House — “Runaway”

Beach House has a highly anticipated new album, Once Twice Melody, coming out in February, but ahead of then, the duo has already shared a sizeable chunk of it. They’ve been releasing sections of the album at a time, and last week brought a new quartet of songs. Included in that is “Runaway,” which is more uptempo than a lot of songs by a band not often paired with that adjective.

Bon Iver and Nicholas Britell — “Second Nature”

You probably know by now that Ariana Grande and Kid Cudi are involved in the new movie Don’t Look Up, but Bon Iver found his way into it, too. He doesn’t appear on screen, but as the movie comes to a close, we hear a new song from him. It’s called “Second Nature” and Justin Vernon said that he was more than excited while making it: “I was energized and inspired beyond words, kinda like a bull in the pen before the rodeo.”

Tierra Whack — “Body Of Water”

While her latest EP Rap? was fresh on her mind, Tierra Whack went ahead and shared Pop?, which includes the highlight “Body Of Water,” on which the rapper firmly and rapidly shows that she is just that: a rapper. All in all, the song is a nice holdover while waiting for Whack to drop Rock? and Jazz? (just kidding: those projects aren’t real, but maybe they will be).

Mitski — “Heat Lightning”

Laurel Hall, Mitski’s highly anticipated (as if a Mitski project can be anything but) new album, is on the way in Q1 2022. The indie favorite previewed it last week with “Heat Lightning,” which I previously noted “starts intimately before blossoming into its first hook and then locking into a rhythmic groove for the rest of the song.”

Khruangbin and Leon Bridges — “B-Side”

Khruangbin and Leon Bridges, both Texas favorites, linked up for the Texas Sun EP last year and now they’re coming back with more collaborative material on Texas Moon. They offered a preview of it last week with “B-Side,” a groovy and funky song that’s tough to not at least nod along to.

Russ — “Note To Self” Feat. Big Sean, Wale, Joey Badass, and Hit-Boy

Russ has earned his place in hip-hop, and if there’s any doubt about that claim, look no further than the newly released Chomp 2. He has certainly found favor in his peers, as the project is packed with features. One song, in particular, is especially loaded, as “Note To Self” features Big Sean, Wale, Joey Badass, and Hit-Boy.

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

In the handful of years since its inception, Rolling Loud has accumulated an impressive number of memorable surprises, from Offset popping out during Cardi B’s headlining set with a big public apology to DaBaby bringing out Tory Lanez for his set in Miami. And while both of those examples land more on the “Facepalm” side of the spectrum, the final night of the festival in San Bernardino brought one that was much more exciting and positive.

During Future’s closing set, the Atlanta rapper brought out one of the biggest names in hip-hop: Kanye West, aka Ye, who joined Future to perform a freestyle to Future’s “F*ck Up Some Commas,” as well as his own monster hit, “Can’t Tell Me Nothing.”

The surprise performance capped an impressive week for Ye, who also held his Free Larry Hoover concert in Los Angeles just a few days earlier. Unfortunately, in true Kanye fashion, that show now has as much potential for controversy as anything else he’s done in the past few years. A new report found that the merchandise profits from the show — which also featured Drake as a special guest, constituting a ceasefire between the two rappers — won’t be donated to any charities.

The Golden Globes celebrate the best in TV and movies, but the music world usually finds its way into the proceedings, too. The nominees for the 2022 event were announced this morning, and sure enough, some of the biggest names in music are on the list.

Lady Gaga scored a huge nomination thanks to her work on House Of Gucci, as she’s up for Best Performance By An Actress In A Motion Picture, Drama. On the flip side, Alana Haim got a nomination for Best Performance By An Actress In A Motion Picture, Musical Or Comedy for her breakout starring role in Licorice Pizza.

When it comes to music-specific awards, Radiohead’s Jonny Greenwood locked up a nomination for Best Original Score for The Power Of The Dog. As for Best Original Song, Motion Picture, the field is packed with familiar names: Beyoncé (for “Be Alive” from King Richard), Lin-Manuel Miranda (“Dos Orugitas” from Encanto), Van Morrison (“Down To Joy” from Belfast), Jennifer Hudson (“Here I Am (Singing My Was Home)” from Respect), and Billie Eilish (“No Time To Die” from No Time To Die).

Meanwhile, a few music-adjacent projects are up for Best Motion Picture, Comedy Or Musical: Cyrano (Aaron and Bryce Dessner composed the film’s score), Don’t Look Up (Kid Cudi and Ariana Grande have roles in the movie), and Licorice Pizza.

Check out the full list of nominees here.