Richard Marx Roasting Tucker Carlson’s Homoerotic New Documentary And ‘Testicle Tanning’ Obsession Is Why The Internet Exists

Had someone predicted, in the late 1980s, that Donald Trump would at one point occupy the Oval Office, everyone would have laughed. What might have been equally implausible would be the idea that Richard Marx—the mulleted singer-songwriter behind such hits as “Don’t Mean Nothing,” “Right Here Waiting,” and “Hold On to the Nights”—would become the hero we never saw coming in the 2020s. But here we are.

For the past decade, Marx’s name has been popping up in the news for a variety of reasons, all of them notable. When he’s not saving an airplane full of people from a dangerous passenger, he can regularly be found shredding MAGA diehards like Scott Baio to bits. The singer’s latest target? Tucker Carlson.

In an effort to push his latest batshit documentary, The End of Men, Carlson is claiming that “one of the biggest stories of our lifetimes is the total collapse of testosterone levels in American men.” And the Fox News host has managed to outdo even himself with his newest obsession about how to combat this problem: testicle tanning.

In true social media superhero style, it did not take long for Marx to arrive on the “bromeopathic” scene and sum it up in two simple tweets.

Not all heroes wear capes. Some (used to) wear mullets.