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Our Most Difficult Blind Taste Test Ever — Featuring A Lineup Of Expensive And Rare Bourbon Whiskeys

Rare and expensive bourbon whiskeys are an investment, and I’m talking more than just money. These bottles are an investment in time, effort, and cash. To dare pour all the bottles we’re featuring today in a blind taste test, you have to know someone, have very deep pockets, or… be me. You might be able to find a few at a really good whiskey bar for $50, $100, $250 a pour but elite, rare, and expensive bourbon is just that — elite, rare, and often really expensive.

Buying one or two of these for special occasions is much more approachable. But if you’re investing in a splurge bottle, it’s a good idea to know what you’re buying. To that end, I had my wife pull ten bottles from the “please don’t touch”-shelf in my office for a blind tasting. The prices ended up ranging from around $200 to over $3,000 per bottle, which is a good range for the high-end stuff.

Of course, that also means that it’s going to be really hard to rank these. Once you get to the highest end, it really comes down to your personal palate over craft — all of these are very well-made.

Our lineup today is:

  • Old Fitzgerald Bottled-in-Bond Spring 2022 Edition
  • Heaven Hill Heritage Collection 1st Edition Aged 17 Years
  • Eagle Rare 17 BTAC 2021
  • Michter’s Singel Barrel Bourbon 10-Year
  • William Larue Weller BTAC 2021
  • Jack Daniel’s Sinatra Select
  • E.H. Taylor Bottled-in-Bond Single Barrel
  • Four Roses 2021 Limited Edition Small Batch
  • Barrell Craft Spirits Gold Label Bourbon
  • George T. Stagg STAC 2020

Let’s dive in and see how these monster bourbons stack up against each other.

Also Read: The Top 5 UPROXX Bourbon Posts Of The Last Six Months

Part 1: The Tasting

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Taste 1

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

Oh, shit. We’re already off to the races on this nose. There’s this sense of blackberry jam filled into a yeasty doughnut that’s covered in powdered sugar with hints of old boot leather, dried braids of cedar bark, and black-tea-soaked dates, cinnamon, and nutmeg baked into a rich and moist sticky toffee pudding. On the palate, there’s a sense of creamy and lush eggnog next to more of that sticky toffee pudding with salted toffee drizzle bespeckled with orange zest that leads to cloves, floral black tea, and sticky pipe tobacco. That sticky tobacco binds to the blackberry jam on the finish with a pure silk mouthfeel.

The moment I nosed this dram and looked at the other nine, I realized that I’m f*cked. It’s going to take forever to rank these.

Taste 2

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

The nose draws you in with a mix of maple syrup over a pecan waffle with a salted butter next to spiced cherry tobacco packed into an old wooden pipe and just lit before nutmeg and dried roses waft in, leading to old library books, worn boot leather, and a hint of burnt toffee. The palate has a slight warming feeling around the mouth that isn’t hot at all but leads to mince meat pie tobacco with a rich and spicy cherry pie filling topped with eggnog ice cream and wrapped up in old leathery tobacco leaves and packed in an old cedar box. The end is luxuriously soft and lush with the spicy cherry melding with the sticky tobacco and Christmas cake vibe to create a silky end.

Yup, f*cked.

Taste 3

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

Black Forest Cake with the dark and damn near creamy stewed cherry, moist chocolate sponge, rich vanilla-laced cream frosting, and flakes of dark and salted dark chocolate counters a layer of mulled wine spices and soft, almost green cedar. The palate amps up the dark and stewed cherry while adding in plenty of nutmeg, allspice, cinnamon, and ground ginger with a thin line of black licorice and maybe some bespoke root beer. That whole vibe combines into a fleeting note of Cherry Coke on the back end before the sweetness fades toward garden boxes made from old railroad ties and filled with dark potting soil, mint, and nasturtiums.

Me thinking about ranking these first three:

Oh Come On Jim Carrey GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Taste 4

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

This is much lighter on the nose with layers of old leather jackets next to dark red berries, orange oil, plenty of eggnog creaminess, a stack of sourdough doughnuts, and a hint of singed marshmallow. The palate has a deep maple syrup sweetness and woodiness that leads toward berry brambles full of tart and sweet berries, green leaves, sharp thorns, and plenty of rich black soil. The mid-palate has a nice balance of spiced maple syrup, vanilla tobacco leaves, and dark chocolate-covered espresso beans. The end has a sweet oak feel that leads to dry almond shells, dry braids of sweetgrass, and another dose of those dark berries.

Okay, I feel like I have my feet under me with this one. This is great but a slight (and I mean slight) step down from the first three.

Taste 5

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

There’s creamy vanilla that’s part vanilla cream sauce, part eggnog, and part creme anglais with a hint of salted caramel that’s just “wow” on the nose. That continues toward this soft yet airy fried doughnut vibe with a hard sugar icing, kind of like a croquembouche with salted cream filling and a dusting of nutmeg. The palate leans into a lemon and vanilla-laced shortbread with roasted cinnamon sticks dipped in spicy cherry syrup, more of that svelte vanilla creaminess, and a hint of smoked apricot and plum with a leathery edge. The finale is sweet, savory, bitter, and a little smoky with a matrix of marzipan covered in salted dark chocolate next to choco-cherry sticky pipe tobacco layered into an old cedar humidor and the wrapped in old yet supple suede with a fleeting hint of dried mint on the very end.

Johnny just swept the leg and I fell flat on my face. Now, little birds are singing and flying in a circle over my head. I thought I was getting a handle on this but this was a knockout. It’s just brilliant.

Taste 6

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

This is completely different with a nose full of ripe peaches, Hostess Apple Pies, vanilla icing, cherry Necco Wafers, sweet black licorice, and old cedar all mingling. The palate is super fruity and has an ultra-plush Cherry-Vanilla-Cream Coke vibe that leads to cherry multivitamins with a hint of old boot leather, a hint of dry reeds, and some soft winter spices. The finish is, again, ultra-plush with marzipan end layered with hints of orange oils and dark chocolate tobacco laced with dark cherry syrup and a hint of apple core and stems leading to a final beat of soft vanilla oils.

Well, this is clearly something from Tennessee (that Necco Wafer and multivitamin note is a dead giveaway). That said, this was pure silk, and all the fruitiness made sense. Not sure where this will go… It doesn’t feel top five right now but there’s a ways to go.

Taste 7

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

Red fruit leather and old cellar beams mingle with vanilla wafers with a nougat, buttery toffee, and a good dose of orchard fruit and wood. The palate has a sharp and warm cinnamon tobacco vibe that leads to more of that dark fruit leather with hints of old leather, mulled wine spices, and old cedar bark countered by a sweet mid-palate full of cotton candy and doughnut balls. The end is all about those dark and leathery berries with a slight blackberry pie vibe that attaches to the spicy tobacco on the very end.

Okay, I’m getting a better handle on these. This is delicious, but a pretty big step down (just in form and depth) from the first five sips.

Taste 8

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

This opens with honey and butter melting over a hot sourdough biscuit with tart berry compote on the side next to a dry humidor and a touch of dry mint. The palate is all about a dark plum jam layered with allspice, cloves, and nutmeg countered by orange oils and dark chocolate flaked with salt. The end arrives quickly and layers cinnamon and ginger to the spice mix before veering into an orange-choco tobacco chewiness with a mild layer of mint-chocolate ice cream on the back end.

Hum. This was really good but a little thinner than expected. There wasn’t that “wow” factor.

Taste 9

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

Dark cherry and candied ginger lead the way toward fruity multivitamins (hello, Tennessee) on the nose with nice doses of sourdough crusts, pine tar, and Key lime pie with a buttery Graham Cracker crust. The palate counters the creamy lime with dark cherry tobacco and bruised peaches swimming in black tea, dried hibiscus, black licorice, and cherry root beer. The mid-palate has a waxy and sour cacao nib vibe that’s accented by orange blossoms and cherry-choco tobacco leaves stacked in an old leather pouch with a hint of cedar lurking in the background.

This is the good stuff but not the “wow” stuff. Feels very mid-range amongst these pours.

Taste 10

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

Tasting Notes:

Boom! The nose is full of Red Hots, sharp ginger, cloves, anise, sassafras, and nutmeg countered by rich vanilla, apple blossoms, and a hint of old cellar beams. The palate then blows out with a lot of ABVs and numbs the spices toward a hint of cotton candy and smoked apricot before the vanilla arrives and smooths things out. The finish is creamy and sharp with those ABVs and spice sneaking back in with a note of dark chocolate-covered espresso beans and old cedar next to a hint of spicy cherry tobacco.

Damn, that was an ABV bomb.

Part 2: The Ranking

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

10. E.H. Taylor Bottled-in-Bond Single Barrel — Taste 7

E.H. Taylor, Jr. Single Barrel
Sazerac Company

ABV: 50%

Average Price: $225

The Whiskey:

The whiskey in this case is a 12-year-old barrel of E.H. Taylor. After the right barrels are found, they’re then cut down very slightly to bottled-in-bond proof, or 100 proof, with that famously soft Kentucky limestone water.

Bottom Line:

This was the most “one-note” whiskey on the list, which is kind of a crazy thing to say because this is unequivocally a great pour. That said, when stacked up against this murderer’s row of whiskeys in this tasting, this was the least engaging overall.

9. Four Roses 2021 Limited Edition Small Batch — Taste 8

Four Roses LE Small Batch
Kirin Brewing

ABV: 57.2%

Average Price: $770

The Whiskey:

2021’s LE Small Batch is a blend of four bourbons. Four Roses is renowned for its ten distinct recipes with two mash bills and five yeast strains. This whiskey marries four of those recipes with two from Mash B (very high rye) and two from Mash Bill E (high rye). The yeasts at play are “delicate fruit,” “spice essence,” and “floral essence.” The barrels ranged from 12 to 16 years old, making this a fairly old bourbon, all things considered.

Bottom Line:

Again, great whiskey but just didn’t hit the heights it needed against this lineup. Overall, this is a tasty sipper that felt a little thin compared to the others today.

8. George T. Stagg BTAC 2020 — Taste 10

George T. Stagg
Sazerac Company

ABV: 65.2%

Average Price: $1,532

The Whiskey:

We started off with the biggest whiskey of the line-up. This juice is distilled from Kentucky corn, Minnesota rye, and a touch of malted barley from North Dakota. The whiskey then spends 15 years and four months in oak in three different warehouses on three different floors. Over that time 59 percent of the whiskey is lost to the angels, leaving a high-proof bourbon.

Bottom Line:

This had so much potential but those ABVs just blew everything out on the palate. That’s a shame. One single rock would have catapulted this whiskey higher on this list.

7. Jack Daniel’s Sinatra Select — Taste 6

Screen-Shot-2020-11-12-at-12.54.12-PM.jpg
Jack Daniel

ABV: 45%

Average Price: $200 (1-liter bottle)

The Whiskey:

Frank Sinatra was one of Jack’s biggest fans. So much so that the crooner was buried with a bottle. The actual juice in this expression is a throwback to how Jack was made in Sinatra’s day. They use special “Sinatra Barrels” that have concentric grooves carved into the newly charred oak, giving the whiskey more surface area to do its thing. Once that’s aged, it’s blended with traditional Old No. 7 and proofed at 45 percent, as it also would have been back in Sinatra’s heydays.

Bottom Line:

This was a massive fruit bomb but still made sense. It was bold and unique. It just tasted really f*cking good. But that wasn’t quite enough today.

6. Barrell Craft Spirits Gold Label Bourbon — Taste 9

Barrell Craft Spirits Gold Label Bourbon
Barrell Craft Spirits

ABV: 56.77%

Average Price: $606

The Whiskey:

This whiskey is a blend of Indiana, Tennessee, and Kentucky bourbons. Each barrel in that blend is a minimum of 16 years old. The barrels were specifically chosen for their cherry, nutty, high-proof, and chocolate profiles. Half of those barrels were then finished in new American oak for a final touch of maturation before vatting and bottling as-is.

Bottom Line:

Interesting, I blindly ranked two whiskeys with Tennessee in the mix back to back. This was way more wild and crazy than Jack, which was very enticing. That said, it didn’t quite hit the “wow, this is what I do this job for”-levels of greatness today.

5. Michter’s Singel Barrel Bourbon 10-Year — Taste 4

Michters Distillery

ABV: 47.2%

Average Price: $552

The Whiskey:

Michter’s is currently distilling and aging their own whiskey, but this is still sourced. The actual barrels sourced for these single barrel expressions tend to be at least ten years old with some rumored to be closer to 15 years old (depending on the barrel’s quality, naturally). Either way, the juice goes through Michter’s bespoke filtration process before a touch of Kentucky’s iconic soft limestone water is added, bringing the bourbon down to a very crushable 94.4 proof.

Bottom Line:

This is where things get close to splitting hairs. This is just classic, refined, and delicious. Still, it didn’t blow my socks off like the next four.

4. Old Fitzgerald Bottled-in-Bond Spring 2022 Edition — Taste 1

Old Fitzgerald Bottled-in-Bond 17
Heaven Hill

ABV: 50%

Average Price: $1,275

The Whiskey:

This wheated bourbon whiskey — 68 percent corn, 20 percent wheat, and 12 percent malted barley — was distilled and laid down in barrels back in 2004. The barrels were vatted after 17 years and proofed down to the bottled-in-bond standard of 100 proof and then bottled in the iconic Old Fitz decanter for a Spring 2022 release.

Bottom Line:

Okay, this is the splitting hairs section. I legit wrote “perfect” in my notes while tasting this pour. I guess that means that the next three are not only perfect whiskeys but somehow added more perfection to the mix.

3. Eagle Rare 17 BTAC 2021 — Taste 3

Screen-Shot-2021-10-21-at-10.23.29-AM.jpg
Sazerac Company

ABV: 50.5%

Average Price: $3,205

The Whiskey:

This whiskey was produced in the spring of 2003. Since then, it lost 73 percent of its volume to the angels as it rested in warehouses C, K, M, and Q on various floors. The barrels were then vatted, barely proofed down, and bottled as-is.

Bottom Line:

This might as well have been a tie with the next two. It’s so deep and interesting while delivering a serious classic vibe that’s pure bourbon to its core.

2. Heaven Hill Heritage Collection 1st Edition Aged 17 Years — Taste 2

Heaven Hill Heritage Collection Bourbon Whiskey
Heaven Hill

ABV: 59.1%

Average Price: $3,200

The Whiskey:

The base of the spirit is Heaven Hill’s classic bourbon 78 percent corn mash bill. This particular whiskey is built from several barrels from four warehouse campuses in the Bardstown area. In this case, the whiskey is made from 28 percent 20-year-old barrels, 44 percent 19-year-old barrels, and 28 percent 17-year-old barrels. Once those barrels are vatted, the bourbon goes into the bottle as-is, without any cutting or fussing.

Bottom Line:

Again, this is a perfect whiskey. I don’t know what else to say. This could have been number one had the order of drams been different, more on that next.

1. William Larue Weller BTAC 2021 — Taste 5

Sazerac Company

ABV: 62.65%

Average Price: $3,200

The Whiskey:

Distilled back in the fall of 2009, this barrel-strength bourbon skips the Minnesota rye and instead uses North Dakota wheat with that NoDak barley and Kentucky corn. The juice spent 12-and-a-half years mellowing in warehouses C, D, K, L, and Q on floors one through three. While maturing, 64 percent of the whiskey was lost to the angels before it was small-batched and bottled as-is.

Bottom Line:

This was the last amazing bourbon in the lineup. The pours directly after this ranked seventh, tenth, ninth, sixth, and eighth respectively. So, did this edge into the first place slot because of that placing?

Maybe….?

You know what, it doesn’t matter. This is still my all-time favorite bourbon. It’s so refined while offering true depth, surprises, comfort, and nostalgia in every sip, every time.

Part 3: Final Thoughts

Expensive Bourbon
Zach Johnston

It’s interesting how a top-five shook out almost immediately. Which is wild given that the “bottom” five on this list are all stellar pours of whiskey. But there’s always nuance to be found, even at the highest echelons.

In the end, great bourbon tends to be revered for a reason. It’s usually pretty f*cking great. So, good luck out there tracking any of these down!

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The Jury In Nipsey Hussle’s Murder Trial Has Been Selected

The trial against Eric Holder, the man accused of shooting and killing Nipsey Hussle, is about to commence, and the jury has been selected according to Los Angeles’ ABC News affiliate. The jurors were sworn in on Monday, with the six alternate jurors chosen on Tuesday should any of the originals need to be replaced. The jury will hear opening statements today.

The trial has been a long time coming, with multiple delays due to COVID-19, Holder’s own stubbornness, and changes to personnel including the assigned judge and Holder’s defense lawyer. Holder pled not guilty to one count of murder, two counts of attempted murder, two counts of assault with a deadly weapon, and one count of felony possession of a firearm in the case back in 2019.

Holder was accused of murdering the Los Angeles rapper in front of his Marathon Clothing store on the corner of the streets Nipsey avidly affirmed in his music: Crenshaw and Slauson. Prosecutors say that Nipsey and Holder had a disagreement, and Holder returned to the store, firing with two handguns, hitting Nipsey and a pair of bystanders. Nipsey was pronounced dead at the hospital.

Nipsey Hussle is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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Report: Jerami Grant Is ‘Widely Expected’ To Get Traded This Offseason

The Detroit Pistons look like they struck gold in the 2021 NBA Draft when they selected Cade Cunningham No. 1 overall. Despite some growing pains, Cunningham appears to be the kind of player around who the franchise can build for the next decade-plus, and next week, the Pistons will try to use the fifth pick in the 2022 Draft to find a running mate alongside him.

Whatever Detroit looks like next season, it appears one prominent member of its 2021-22 roster won’t be around. In his latest mock draft, ESPN’s Jonathan Givony wrote that the expectation is that the Pistons will part ways via trade with veteran forward Jerami Grant at some point this offseason.

“The incumbent is widely expected to be on the move this summer, as he’s entering the final year of his contract and doesn’t look to be on the same timetable as the rest of the Pistons’ roster,” Givony wrote.

Grant’s name has been kicked around in recent months in trade rumors, and while he stuck around after the deadline last year, there were reports indicating that the team was willing to listen to offers for the 28-year-old. Grant joined the team in free agency during the 2020 offseason after thriving in a reserve role for the Denver Nuggets, and is entering the final year of his deal this season.

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Post Malone Admits He Writes The Majority Of His Song Lyrics While He Is Pooping

Some of the greatest talents throughout music’s existence have been unorthodox in a variety of ways, which truly speaks to how creativity isn’t linear. No one can predict inspiration as it comes when it comes. Post Malone reaffirmed this wide-spanning reality on Monday (June 13) when he admitted on Howard Stern’s show that he writes a good portion of his songs while on the toilet.

He discussed many topics with the SiriusXM host, most notably his daughter, fiancee, and what he does for fun, but was especially enthused to share this tidbit about his creative process. “No one wants to come and talk to you while you’re taking a sh*t,” the “White Iverson” artist stated while advocating for the solitude that is inherent in that environment. He actually provided numbers too, saying 30% of his albums and 60% of his lyrics have been completed while on the can.

The 26-year-old has multiple No. 1 albums and singles, so evidently, the stench isn’t turning listeners away. The latest, Twelve Carat Toothache, was released on June 3 with features from The Weeknd, Doja Cat, Roddy Ricch, Gunna, and more, selling 121,000 album-equivalent units in its first week.

Check out Post Malone’s conversation with Howard Stern in the snippet above.

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Kid Cudi’s Album And Animated Netflix Series ‘Entergalactic’ Get A Release Date

Kid Cudi’s been promoting his cross-media project Entergalactic for some time now. First announced in 2019, the title applies to both a Netflix animated series and an album that will accompany it. While he released the first single from the album, “Do What I Want,” a week ago, the trailer for the series dropped a few days before. Meanwhile, in all that, we still had no idea when either was actually coming out. But now we do.

Cudi announced the shared release date, September 30, with a tweet featuring a short clip showing off the series’ unique animation style, as his character lights up a joint and blows a cloud of smoke into the air in the shape of the project’s title. The clip also plays a snippet of one of the songs that will presumably appear on the album.

In addition to Entergalactic, Cudi’s taken on a number of other film projects in varying capacities in the past few months, from an acting role in John Woo’s upcoming action thriller Silent Night to his first-ever directorial one for Teddy, a film Cudi wrote that is co-produced by Jay-Z. He’ll also appear in X co-star Brittany Snow’s directorial debut September 17th. Mr. Mescudi’s got a busy schedule ahead of him.

Watch the trailer for Entergalactic above.

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Ladies Beware, Nazi/White Supremacist Richard Spencer Is Prowling The Dating Apps And Claiming To Be Politically ‘Moderate’

Richard Spencer, the Nazi/white supremacist leader who led a 2017 flash mob (full of brandished tiki torches and everything) in Charlottesville, North Carolina, wants everyone to believe that he’s turned over a new leaf. He’s apparently motivated by a desire to find love again after his marriage dissolved amid allegations of domestic violence on his behalf. Never mind that his far-right fan base has turned on him, and he was greeted by an audience of hecklers while touring universities. He’s also admittedly broke and had his gym membership revoked due to his confrontational nature, but The Spence won’t let that stop him.

A brave Jezebel writer (Laura Bassett) went into investigative mode after receiving a tip that Spencer’s cruising Bumble in the Dallas, Texas area. She gathered screencaptures of a man who remarkably looked like Richard Spencer and claimed to be 6’1″ tall and a Taurus who’s seeking a relationship (not a hookup!). He also, curiously, labeled himself as “moderate” and “vaccinated.”

You might be raising your eyebrows at those last two claims, too. Bassett took the plunge and contacted Spencer after wondering if someone was using his photos as a catfish. And that’s a fair question, given that Spencer’s photos are projecting a man who’s putting on the full “Christmas tree photo” airs (really, you must see these photos), but Spencer (as contacted through his phone number) confirmed that, yes, that’s his Bumble profile, and he’d “appreciate your respecting my privacy.” He texted, “This is obviously not newsworthy. I’m simply living my life.”

Spencer continued to respond to Bassett while declaring (in a series of texts), “I’m not a white supremacist leader any more. The entire right generally hates me. The feeling of [sic] mutual / On basic issues, I’m pretty much a liberal: Gun control, abortion, etc / I don’t lie or deceive anyone.” He neglects to mention his love of Confederate statues, but whaddya gonna do? Man, online dating is full of people pretending not to be themselves, but it sure sounds like this would make for one hellaciously awkward first date.

Ladies, imagine showing up and meeting the man who the Southern Poverty Law Center describes as “a suit-and-tie version of the white supremacists of old, a kind of professional racist in khakis.” He’s also the guy, as SPLC notes, who invented the “alt-right” term to downplay straight-up white supremacist beliefs and make them seem a little more friendly. Yup, that’s a hard Swipe Left!

(Via Jezebel)

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Rhea Seehorn Teases That ‘Death Is Not The Only Tragic End’ For Kim Wexler On ‘Better Call Saul’

Is it time to stop worrying about Kim Wexler?

Probably — but then I read Variety‘s very good profile of Rhea Seehorn, the actress who tragically hasn’t been nominated for an Emmy (let alone Emmys) for her performance on Better Call Saul, and my anxiety soars. It begins:

Rhea Seehorn’s fiancé doesn’t know if Kim Wexler lives. Neither do her stepchildren, who recently became Better Call Saul fans — and now demand similar answers about her fate. There are just six episodes left before the Breaking Bad prequel wraps up its six-season run in August. How it all ends is a closely guarded secret.

Seehorn obviously doesn’t reveal anything about Kim’s fate in the profile, although she does tease, “Death is not the only tragic end.” Bob Dylan was right.

Ahead of the final season, Bob Odenkirk laid out a future in which Kim is “a super-powered lawyer with the white-shoe law firm” and Saul is a “complete scumbag ambulance chaser across town,” and every night, “they go home, take off their disguises and be kind to each other.” But, he added, “I don’t think that’s where we’re going to go.”

Based on Seehorn’s comment, a more likely scenario is that she’s in prison during the events of Breaking Bad, which is why Saul turns into a complete guilt-riddled scumbag. Or Saul and Kim are both free but they can’t interact (or have sex while scheming) out of fear for the other’s safety, for whatever reason. Or Seehorn is messing with us, and Kim is for sure going to die. I don’t like either of these options. Or this ominous teaser.

Better Call Saul returns on July 11.

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Samuel L. Jackson Would Much Rather Be A Superhero Or A Jedi Than Chase An Oscar, Thank You Very Much

While some actors really want that monumental Oscar moment (think Leonardo DiCaprio in every movie he was in from 2000-2015) others would rather have fun than play a stuffy old man living in the woods while being stalked by a bear. That includes Samuel L Jackson, who is known for both his serious roles and his…less serious ones.

While Jackson has an honorary Academy Award, the actor recently spoke to the Los Angeles Times and explained that he doesn’t really feel like acting in Oscar-bait movies anymore. After so many years in the industry, he has that authority. And the money. “As jaded as I wanted to be about it, you know thinking, ‘Well, I should have won an Oscar for this or should have won for that and it didn’t happen,’ once I got over it many years ago, it wasn’t a big deal for me,” Jackson said. “I always have fun going to the Oscars. I always look forward to getting a gift basket for being a presenter. [Laughs] I give stuff to my relatives; my daughter and my wife would take stuff out. It’s cool… But otherwise, I was past it.”

While he will probably still kill it in all of his roles, he prefers to do the big-budget superhero movies that barely get Oscar buzz, but get a lot of money. “I was never going to let the Oscars be a measure of my success or failure as an actor. My yardstick of success is my happiness: Am I satisfied with what I’m doing? I’m not doing statue-chasing movies. You know [whispers]: ‘If you do this movie, you’ll win an Oscar.’ No, thanks. I’d rather be Nick Fury. Or having fun being Mace Windu with a lightsaber in my hand.” He is ready for his Star Wars redemption arc!

The actor added that he doesn’t care about Oscars, but he does care about the fans. Specifically, the ones who read lines back to him. “I’m the guy who does the lines that people see on T-shirts. There’s actors who go their whole careers and no one can quote a line they’ve said in a movie. People go to watch my movies to see how crazy I’m going to be or see how many times I say motherf*cker. Whatever gets them in the seats.” And boy those fans sure do get in those seats!

(Via Los Angeles Times)

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Gunna Keeps A Baddie In Every City In His Self-Directed ‘Banking On Me’ Video

Gunna might be locked up while he awaits trial on racketeering charges along with Young Thug and YSL, but that isn’t stopping him from promoting his new album DS4EVER. While he may have been booed up with pop-R&B star Chloe Bailey in real life — no matter how much he tried to deny it — he still has an image to maintain as the primary pusher of P, and so in his new video for “Banking On Me,” he projects the consummate image of a coast-to-coast player, keeping a baddie in each major city as he jet sets around the country living that rapper lifestyle.

It helps that the video is self-directed; who wouldn’t want to cast himself as the centerpiece of a nationwide rotation of pretty women? However, the video also fits the song’s subject as well; Gunna has to keep swapping them out — after all, he doesn’t want to get bored.

Unfortunately, Gunna may not get the chance to enjoy the fruits of his labor for a while. In May, he and the rest of the YSL crew were arrested as part of a sweeping RICO case that alleged they were a hybrid gang responsible for dozens of violent acts in the Atlanta area. He goes on trial early next year.

Watch the “Bank On Me” video above.

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Britney Spears Insists Her Brother Wasn’t Invited To Her Wedding: ‘Go F*ck Yourself, Bryan’

Britney Spears and Sam Asghari got married a few days ago now, and initial reports indicated that while Spears’ father Jamie Spears, mother Lynne Spears, and sister Jamie Lynn Spears were not invited to the wedding, her brother Bryan Spears was expected to attend. Now, Spears has debunked that, insisting that Bryan was not invited while offering some choice words about her brother.

Referencing a 2020 interview Bryan gave on the As NOT Seen On TV podcast, Spears wrote in a now-deleted Instagram post, “Your podcast interview was so SPECIAL [eyes rolling emoji] !!! I know you and the family had no bad intentions at all whatsoever taking all those years away when I wanted to honestly just be a respected individual with a glass of red wine … but like you said in your interview … Bryan when asked by that incredibly kind man ‘why doesn’t your family just let her be ???’ Your response was …’she can’t even make a dinner reservation …’”

She continued, “You were never invited to my wedding so why even respond ??? Do you honestly think I want my brother there who told me no to a Jack and coke for 4 years … what ???.” Spears later concluded, “I know you’re my blood and yes blood runs deep but no family of mine would do what you guys did to me … Pssss … I liked your post, brother !!! Happy Britdependece Day !!! Congratulations Brit Brit !!! GO F*CK YOURSELF Bryan – F*ck you [middle finger emoji] …”

Read Spears’ full post below.

“I got my happy on y’all !!! Happy, happy, happy !!! My friend watched the video of the party and to be exact Madonna fell 3 times … Selena Gomez fell 2 times and I fell once all because of the rose petals … I’m surprised I didn’t fall every 5 minutes … and no, I didn’t drink one sip of alcohol !!! I can’t drink a lot …

true story – the 13 years of being in the conservatorship I was drug tested at least 3 times a week … I don’t even really like alcohol … meanwhile I heard that my dad would go to bars every night . and my brother had his shrimp salad with a Jack and coke every night in Vegas after my show and even sometimes before !!! He would never even let me have a sip … you let your 5-year-old daughter put her hand in her mother’s wine and be silly yet when I just get off the stage for the 3rd time that week and my little feet have been in heels I walk to the only table in my suit and you tell me no my question is this WHY????

Let’s talk about it … is it the powerful feeling dad got my whole life in literally making me feel like absolutely nothing … I’m sorry but cops are kind of the EXACT same way … just because they wear a star on their shirt every day they think that gives them the opportunity to bully people … end of that story

so I was so excited when I went to Vegas last month … I’m such a badass … NOT !!! But I actually could drink a lot when I was younger … my girlfriend and I could hold 2 bottles of champagne by ourselves at her beach house, then go to dinner that night and I would end up taking care of everybody at night … so in Vegas, I was ready to have my first vodka and Sprite !!! No lie, I literally drank half the cup and suddenly my stomach went into a knot so my friend finished the drink … at the restaurant, I was like ‘OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH’ my stomach felt like a freaking brick !!! To make a long story short … I basically couldn’t leave my room for 2 days because it upset my stomach … ok, so I’m older and more sensitive now and yes, I’m a little bitter because I used to be able to have fun when I would drink but now I either get too sick or I go straight to sleep !!! It’s pretty funny my family doing what they did to me with drug testing me that whole time and yet I can’t stand most alcohol !!! Nope, I’m not cool … I wish I could play that bad girl my family wants me to play but honestly .. I’m too old for this sh*t !!!

And Bryan … your podcast interview was so SPECIAL [eyes rolling emoji] !!! I know you and the family had no bad intentions at all whatsoever taking all those years away when I wanted to honestly just be a respected individual with a glass of red wine … but like you said in your interview … Bryan when asked by that incredibly kind man ‘why doesn’t your family just let her be ???’ Your response was …’she can’t even make a dinner reservation …’ None of you ever wanted it to end because you all loved telling me what to do and treating me like absolutely nothing !!! What you said right there to that man in that interview said everything, Bryan !!!

You were never invited to my wedding so why even respond ??? Do you honestly think I want my brother there who told me no to a Jack and coke for 4 years … what ??? If we were going to drink together at the wedding and play the classy roles for the children like you and mom do as you people literally hid coffee and alcohol when I would come home … you hurt me and you know it !!!

And I might force myself to drink Jack tonight … look up at the moon and say ‘FUCK YOU [middle finger emoji] !!!’ Psss I have an assistant to make my dinner reservations … DID YOU NOT KNOW ??? I know you’re my blood and yes blood runs deep but no family of mine would do what you guys did to me … Pssss … I liked your post, brother !!! Happy Britdependece Day !!! Congratulations Brit Brit !!! GO F*CK YOURSELF Bryan – F*ck you [middle finger emoji] …”