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Lauren Boebert’s Got A New Conspiracy Theory About Dogs, Venezuela, And Her Right To Assault Weapons

Rootin’ tootin’ Lauren Boebert is making zero sense while arguing that Americans need their assault weapons, gosh dang it. In retrospect, this seems like a natural progression for a congressperson who began her term with a video of her strutting her stuff, declaring that she only weighs 100 pounds, and telling the world that she’ll carry her Glock in the halls of Congress. The owner of the now-defunct Shooters’ Grill then seemed pretty triggered when an SNL sketch didn’t hold back on parodying her reputation.

From there, Boebert hasn’t let up, even though she seems to believe that the Second Amendment is the main part of the U.S. Constitution worth valuing. And on the same day that she revealed her proposal to allow lawmakers more time to read bills before voting on them, Boebert slipped in a strange conspiracy theory while appearing on Newsmax.

According to Boebert, the poverty-stricken nation of Venezuela has fallen into their dire situation because citizens don’t have access to assault weapons. And Boebert is attempting to drum up hysteria by claiming that this will happen if the U.S. enacts more gun control laws in response to the unending waves of mass shootings.

Obviously, she’s not making much sense here unless guns have harnessed the magical ability to grow food like they’re trees. Yet Boebert didn’t even study up on parts of speech (let alone logic) before becoming a U.S. lawmaker. In other words, guns are akin to religion for Boebert, and she even celebrates Christmas with guns around the tree. So, yup, she’s gonna root and toot until she’s out of office.