Rudy Giuliani Thinks It’s A Shame That Cops Can’t Just Punch You In The Face Anymore, Like They Did In The Good Old Days

Like many septuagenarians, Rudy Giuliani is longing for the good ol’ days, and it’s hard to blame him. Life for the 78-year old was much easier back in the day — back when he was married to his cousin, when he was named TIME’s Person of the Year and referred to as “America’s Mayor,” and when he wasn’t the target of a criminal election fraud probe in Georgia. But the times, they are a-changin’ — and boy does Rudy know it!

On Monday, Rudy chatted with conservative talk show host Joe Pags (a clear indication that even Newsmax might be tiring of being the only network to welcome the former New York City mayor as a guest) and lamented how sensitive the world has become to what used to be perfectly acceptable behavior… like police brutality.

While discussing “how bad” it has become for police officers, Giuliani whined about how today’s police “can’t use [their] guns” and “can’t touch anybody.” Poor things. Rudy then went on to make what he likely thought was a truly astute observation and cute family story:

One of the reasons why cops are having a hard time — people go, ‘they’re not strong.’ … they’re not allowed to touch you… They can’t punch you! I had an uncle, who was the most decorated police officer… Great hero. My uncle had a knockout punch. All he had to do was blow it past you and you fell down. He was 6’4” — but you could be 6’4” and not have a knockout punch… My father was a boxer; my father taught him how to box and this guy could put you down with one punch. Nowadays… Think of the people he didn’t have to shoot because of that!

While neither punching nor shooting a suspect would also be an option, one has to imagine it might be hard to convince Rudy of that. Which is all pretty rich coming from a man who swore a light tap on the back nearly killed him.