In Georgia, today is the day when citizens will cast their votes in a runoff election and we’ll soon find out whether Herschel “I’d Rather Be a Werewolf” Walker will actually fill a seat in the U.S. Senate. As the minutes ticked down to this momentous occasion, Republicans were pulling out all the stops to bring their heavy-hitters to the Peach State, as Jimmy Kimmel shared on Monday night.
“Over the past couple of weeks, a parade of Republican senators have humiliated themselves making in-person appearances to support Herschel Walker,” Kimmel explained. “But none of all those who appeared proved goofier than Louisiana senator John Kennedy,” who explained that it’s easy to recognize “these woke, high IQ stupid people” (by which we assume he means Democrats) because of the “Ziploc bags of kale” they’re always carrying.
“I have some bad news for Senator Kennedy,” Kimmel said. “That green stuff we’re carrying around in Ziploc bags? That is not kale.”
But Kennedy still had nothing on Walker, who offered up yet another one of his impossibly stupid ideas when he suggested that the best way to protect America’s children is to “Get them 87,000 IRS agents to get out to that schoolhouse and protect our family.”
Kimmel could not contain his laughter when he commented on “what a fabulous idea” this is: “Arm the IRS and send them to kindergarten!”
While millions of Georgians, mainly Democrats, have already cast their votes via mail-in ballot, Kimmel noted that Republicans have instead decided to wait in line to cast their votes today — much like they plan to wait in line to see Walker star in the new Avatar movie, which Kimmel ran the trailer for. It featured a very blue Walker and some of his most inane quotes, which — if Walker was watching — Kimmel says probably had him confused and wondering, “When did I do that?”
You can watch the full clip above, beginning at the 5:30 mark.