Month: March 2023

Matthieu Ricard says that the way for all of us to live sustainably on this planet is to adopt a culture of thinking about each other. And not just the others who are here right now, but also people we’ll never meet.

He tells us some stuff that you’re probably tired of hearing. We’re exhausting our planets resources. Humanity has completely screwed everything up on this planet.

But stick around because he’s going to get crazy surprising.

This is not a speech about recycling.

He points out that our situation is even more serious than you might have known. We’re rapidly exceeding the planetary boundaries that make Earth habitable.

And, let’s be honest, it’s easy not to feel crazy urgent about this, right?

• The glaciers are melting, but I didn’t see them back when they were all there.
• There’s a flotilla of plastic out in the Pacific, but it’s pretty far from my home.
• And we’ve lost half of the world’s species since 1970, but how many of them were cute ones? (Kidding — lots of them were.)

When we consider how we treat our planet, when we’re talking about big action, we’re doing it because we’d like our kids and grandkids to not live in a post-apocalyptic hellscape.

But then he offers a solution.

And it’s not about buying a Prius.

So, his big revolutionary advice is just to look out for each other but in a tremendous way. Look out for your neighbor. Look out for your friend. Look out for your enemy and their great-great-great-grandkid.

But is that possible? And can we be happy if we think about others that much?

In fact, it happens all the time. So often that it’s not newsworthy. This ordinary goodness is what helps communities and families grow.

An international survey found that the very most perfect predictor of happiness is the quality of human relationships.

But what is altruism? Is it a choice? Is it something we do for ourselves so that we will feel good about ourselves?

But how do we encourage that impulse to grow within ourselves, our communities, and our children?

For that, you’ll have to watch the video.

If you went to elementary school in the United States, then you learned that vowels are “A, E, I, O, U and sometimes Y.” All other letters of the alphabet are consonants and make a hard or soft sound depending on their placement around the vowel.

But apparently, our elementary school teachers may have missed a sometime-y vowel…and nobody puts “R” in the corner.

That was a terrible “Dirty Dancing“ reference, but nonetheless, here we are looking at the English language with a collective “What the heck?” At no point in my native English-speaking life did I ever realize “R” could sometimes possess the characteristics of a vowel. But PBS said so, and they brought us “Sesame Street,” so I’m inclined to believe them.

Erica Brozovsky, Ph.D. breaks down what makes a vowel and explores how the letter “R” in the English language fits that description in the PBS series “Otherwords.”

“Linguists define vowels not so much as letters but sounds,” Dr. Brozovsky explains. “To qualify as a vowel, a sound must meet a few general criteria.” The criteria include that your voice box must vibrate when you make the sound, it should function as the peak of a syllable and you must have an unobstructed vocal tract when you say it. That basically just means you can’t use your lips or tongue to make the sound, or it would be considered a consonant.

Now, I know what you’re doing. You’re making the “R” sound thinking, “My teeth are touching my lips to make that sound.” But before you write off Dr. Brozovsky, you should check out the video, because using “R” as a vowel seems to be a regional thing that people from certain parts of Boston and New York have mastered, likely without even knowing. But she can explain it much better than I can, so check out the video below.

Software developer Angie Jones’ recent girls trip revealed that America still has a long way to go when it comes to race.

To most, that’s not surprising. But what’s unique is how the specific experience Jones and her friends went through revealed the pervasive way systemic racism still runs through our culture.

Jones is the Senior Director of Developer Relations at Applitools, holds 26 patented inventions in the United States of America and Japan, and is an IBM Master Inventor.

On July 27, she tweeted about a flight she took with nine other Black women and they all sat in first class. “People literally could not process how it was possible,” she wrote. “Staff tried to send us to regular lines. Passengers made snide remarks. One guy even yelled ‘are they a higher class of people than I am?!'”

this weekend I went on a girls trip. 10 Black women flying first class. People literally could not process how it was possible. nnStaff tried to send us to regular lines. Passengers made snide remarks. One guy even yelled “are they a higher class of people than I am?!”nnStay mad.

— Angie Jones (@Angie Jones)
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Jones and her friends were the targets of racism that ranged from the seemingly unconscious — people who assumed that Black people don’t sit in first class — to the blatant — those who were seriously bothered that Black people were being treated as having a higher status.

It’s interesting that she didn’t mention anyone saying “good for you” for succeeding in a world that often holds people of color back. Instead, she was greeted with incredulity and jealous rage.

There are a lot of white people who can’t stand the idea of a Black person being elevated above them. It’s disturbing that in 2021 there are still some who will admit it publicly.

Jones’ tweets inspired a lot of people to share their stories about the racism they’ve experienced while flying first class.

Jones’ tweets also angered some people to the point that they denied her story. To which she responded, “To those saying I’m lying, you’re a huge part of the problem,” she wrote. “You tell yourself a notable person is lying (for what reason, I cannot figure out) before you believe there are actual racists in…America.”

pic.twitter.com/EkhqeU58yg

— Mr. Skilling (@Mr. Skilling)
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One Twitter user came up with the perfect retort to the person who asked, “Are they a higher class of people than I am?!”

fuck I wish I would’ve thought to say this!!!

— Angie Jones (@Angie Jones)
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fuck I wish I would’ve thought to say this!!!

— Angie Jones (@Angie Jones)
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This article originally appeared on 07.29.21

Have you ever ridden in an Uber or a Lyft and had the driver talk a lot when you felt like being quiet? Or not say a word when you tried to make conversation? Or play music you found annoying?

When you hop into a driver’s car, it’s a crapshoot what kind of ride you’re going to have. But at least one Lyft driver is removing the mystery a bit by letting passengers choose.

Facebook user Eric Alper shared a post that showed a photo of a piece of paper stuck on the back of a car’s headrest that read:

“Welcome to Cameron’s car!!!”

“To ensure the best ride possible for you, I have prepared a menu of the various types of rides I offer. Just choose one (or don’t, that’s an option too) then sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. :)”

Then it listed the 10 ride options Cameron offers:

1. The Awkward Ride – You ignore this menu completely, then we will sit in silence for the remainder of the ride.

2. The Funny Ride – I tell you jokes or entertaining stories from my life.

3. The Silent Ride –

4. The Creepy Ride – I don’t say anything but I keep staring at you in the rearview mirror.

5. The Karaoke Ride – We rock out to hits from the 80s, early 2000s or literally whatever you want.

6. The Bubbles Ride – We blow bubbles the whole time.

7. The Small Talk Ride – We talk about how crazy the weather’s been lately and I ask if you caught the game last night.

8. The Therapy Ride – You vent to me about your problems and I listen.

9. The Drunk Ride – You throw up in my car.

10. The Cliche Ride – You ask me how long I’ve been driving for Lyft.”

OK, the Bubbles Ride sounds fun, but also maybe a little dangerous. And the Drunk Ride is the main reason I’ve never wanted to be a Lyft or Uber driver. I may have unintentionally taken a both a Therapy Ride and a Creepy Ride before.

But seriously, the concept is fabulous. People often want something different in a ride depending on their mood, so the idea of having options to choose from is brilliant. The list also directly addresses the awkwardness that is often present when you’re getting a ride from someone, so it makes a natural icebreaker and conversation starter—particularly helpful for folks who struggle with social anxiety.

People in the comments loved it.

“I’m sure this wasn’t the intention but this is a great example of disability accommodations that everyone can enjoy,” wrote one person. “Being able to choose how much energy I expend is so helpful.”

“There should be a feature on both Uber and Lyft indicating what type of ride a rider wants or expects,” wrote another. “I usually don’t talk, but sometimes the driver keeps persisting and I feel awkward at times.”

“It clears the air, takes the awkwardness out of it, and establishes expectations for the ride, on both sides,” wrote another. “Great idea.”

There are some more options I’d love to see added, though:

The Pep Talk Ride – You need encouragement? I’ll give you everything I’ve got to pump you up.

The Tour Guide Ride – I share interesting details about places we pass and offer advice on cool things to do around the area.

The Life Story Ride – We estimate how long your ride will be, set a timer, and each of us shares our life story for half the ride. (No questions, unless the ride goes longer.)

The Deep Questions Ride – We skip the small talk and get right to the big stuff—meaning of life, existence of God, our place in the universe, etc.

The High School Debate Ride – We pick a controversy, flip a coin to decide who will take which side, and debate regardless of our own personal views.

The Pretend Persona Ride – We each make up totally fake names and personas and converse as them so we can chat without actually getting personal at all.

So many possibilities. What kind of ride would you want to take?

This article originally appeared on 04.21.22

The Oscars are less than a week away as of this writing, which means it’s time for an another annual tradition: random Oscar voters anonymously sharing their weird hot takes with industry publications. On Tuesday The Hollywood Reporter shared the ballot and comments of a male AMPAS member who’s part of the short films and animation features branch. This guy had some pretty standard opinions: He liked Banshees of Inisherin and All Quiet and the Western Front and he was really impressed with Everything Everywhere All at Once.

But what about another of the year’s most popular films, Top Gun: Maverick. That one he’s conflicted about. It was robbed of a Best Cinematography nomination, he said. As for the one it got for Adapted Screenplay? Well, he says it’s “probably the weakest” of the bunch. (He’d give it to Glass Onion, saying, “Rian Johnson is great — give Rian Johnson an Oscar!”)

Mind you, one could make the argument that Maverick’s script is classical, which is to say it has the shape and hits all the beats of a crowd-pleaser from only a few decades ago. Hollywood screenplays aren’t written like that anymore!

What are some of his other unpopular opinions? The Fabelmans is “a little long.” Tár “takes too long to get to its point,” and, as per its Best Editing nom, it “could have used more editing.” He’s “confused” about all the hoopla over Paul Mescal in Aftersun. (He’s no Austin Butler in Elvis, the “clear winner, to me.”) He didn’t finish Causeway, the source of Brian Tyree Henry’s Best Supporting Actor nomination. Both Kerry Condon and Hong Chau, for Banshees and The Whale, were “fine.” EO, the great donkey movie up for the Best International Feature, was “a bit boring.”

As for Andrea Riseborough’s surprise nom for To Leslie, he thought she was “great” but the way she was “muscled-in” (via a bunch of fellow actors singing her praises, rather than a moneyed Oscar campaign) “felt very mafia-ish, like the people with the power decided that this should happen, so it did.”

This mystery voter had some other standard opinions. He gushed about Ke Huy Quan, saying his story “makes you hopeful and reminds you that it’s never really over in Hollywood unless you’re dead or Will Smith.”

Hell, he’s even very pro-“Naatu Naatu,” the kickass song from the otherwise un-nominated RRR. “I mean, have you seen the videos of people dancing in theaters?” he wrote. “That’s not happening with any of the other songs.”

The Oscars are set to air on ABC on Sunday, March 12, starting at 8pm. It’s very unlikely that someone’s going to get slapped again, no matter what its host says.

You can read this dude’s whole ballot over at THR.

It’s a new era for Tori Kelly. The singer’s last album (not counting her 2020 Christmas record) was 2019’s Inspired By True Events. Now she’s making her grand return with a single called “Missin U.”

Arriving next week, “Missin U” has been previewed on TikTok, with the “Nobody Love” singer posting a clip of her mouthing along to the words: “Out on these streets, deleting what you mean to me / Then you pop back, back in my mind / I go back in time, it was the perfect night / Kissing you was raining purple skies,” she sings.

The Pink Sweat$ collaborator also shared a nostalgic teaser. The video depicts her sliding a VHS tape into a TV, and what follows is a montage of old footage of her performing, especially showing off her strong, inimitable vocals.

The song seems to lean heavily into her R&B side, which has been surprising to many fans. Most don’t even recognize her in the artwork, in which she no longer has a head of cascading blonde curls. Music lovers are just now finding out that Kelly is actually biracial, which is stirring up a lot of conversation and memes on social media.

“Missin U” is out 3/17. Find more information about it here.

On Monday night, Tucker Carlson aired the first in a series of reports on what his team found after being gifted 40,000 hours of Jan. 6 riot footage. Surprise surprise: He cherry-picked mundane footage that made the violent incident look peaceful, calling the insurrectionists mere “sightseers.” It was cynical, even lazy, and it even got pushback from some braver Republican lawmakers. It was so bad even Tucker’s own network tore it apart.

On Tuesday, not long before Carlson’s nightly episode was set to begin, anchor Brett Baier aimed a segment dispassionately looking at the report, and mostly concluding that it was bunk. It featured some of the GOP lawmakers who slammed it to the press the day after, including South Dakota senator John Thune reiterating that the attack was just that, and North Dakota’s Kevin Cramer straight up calling it a “lie.”

And of course, there was Mitch McConnell, who was visibly shaken after the riot, so much so that he later voted against prosecuting Trump over his second impeachment. He even said he’d still support him in 2024, despite him lobbing racist taunts at his own wife. Still, at least he cleared the perilously low bar of not rewriting history.

“It was a mistake, in my view, for Fox News to depict this in a way that’s completely at variance with what our chief law enforcement official here at Capitol thinks,” McConnell said of Tucker’s segment.

Tuesday’s report didn’t shy away from mentioning that Capitol police officer Brian Sicknick, whose surviving partner also torched Tucker’s segment, died of a blood clot the day after Jan. 6. It even mentioned that 140 officers were assaulted during the attack, while 106 perpetrators have been charged with using a deadly weapon on that day.

The report went hard. It even quoted Capitol police chief Thomas J. Manger saying that Tucker had “cherry-picked from calmer moments,” not showing the “chaos and violence.” It even featured an expert explaining the footage that finds some perpetrators, like QAnon Shaman, calmly walking with officers, who were, he said, simply de-escalating the situation, which is part of their job.

Baier concluded the segment by reminding viewers that “no one here at Fox News condones any of the violence that happened on Jan. 6.” Well, maybe not everyone.

So congrats, Fox News, on at least covering a reckless report aired on their very own network, and even contradicting its most basic claims. Surely Tucker himself will take it in stride when he returns for more Tuesday night.

You can watch video of the report on Mediaite.

Europe is a wonderland for culinary travel. The wines of Italy, Spain, and France have the cellars that oenophile dreams are made of. The food halls of Berlin, London, and Rome are the gourmand’s delight. The pizza of Naples has to be tried at least once in your life. The tapas of Barcelona will inspire you. And the beers of Germany, Belgium, England, and Czechia are probably the best in the world.

Look, food and drink just hits different in the best corners of Europe because, often, it is. But let’s not fool ourselves. There are still plastic packages of processed cheese, Burger King and Starbucks, and generally crappy food and drink over there too. And that’s very true of beer. Germany, Belgium, England, Czechia, and everywhere else all have trash cheap beer too. Stuff that’ll give you a wicked headache the next morning. Let’s not pretend that these places are fantasy lands where everything’s better.

Still… some things are made better across the ponds and it’s important to go and try them. Especially the beer.

To that end, we’ve reached out to some beer experts and brewers to ask what their favorite city is to visit for a beer-fueled adventure. A lot of classic cities came up with a few outliers that might surprise you. Hopefully, these beer-centric looks at iconic European cities will inspire you to finally book that trip of a lifetime and chase down some good beer this year. Let’s dive in!

— Zach Johnston, Drinks Editor UPROXX Life

Rome, Italy — Zach Johnston, Drinks Editor UPROXX Life

The Beer City:

Rome isn’t the first place in Europe anyone thinks of when they think of beer. Hell, that’s probably true of Italy as a whole. But Rome has one of the coolest beer scenes in Europe and some of the hippest beer bars as well. The main attraction of Italian beer is its quality. Like the food, wine, and spirits, it’s just … better. The deep adoration for agriculture and culinary arts in Italy is just as present in brewing and the beer is all the better for it. And like any capital city, all of the best from all over the country — and in this case the continent — makes it to the beer bars of Rome.

What To Drink:

Everything. I’m only half joking. But Rome has a great balance of local craft and European powerhouses. The absolute must-stop place in the Eternal City is Ma Che Siete Venuti a Fa at Via Benedetta 25. The whole place is a scene unto itself. You’ll meet some serious beer nerds drinking there and they’ll help you find the other great spots in the city. That aside, the selection here is one the best in all of Europe, seriously. The owners travel around Europe and procure the best barrels of beer from all styles and regions to pour at their tiny, hole-in-the-wall beer bar. It’s truly magical.

Bamberg, Germany — Phil Markowski, brewmaster at Two Roads Brewing

The Beer City:

Bamberg is a beautifully charming city. It was spared destruction in World War II and retains much of its original character. But unlike other German ‘fairytale’ towns, Bamberg is a living, functioning city of 80,000 people. Moreover, it’s a city of that size with 10-plus breweries essentially within walking distance of each other. In a few cases, breweries are literally across the street from each other — such is the case with the famed Mahr’s and Keesmann breweries and Fassla and Spezial breweries. A couple of these have a Gasthaus, where you can spend the night.

What To Drink:

Bamberg has a large variety of beer styles to offer. Most of the breweries in town brew a variety of styles in addition to local classic rauchbier (smoked beer made from locally smoked malted barley). On my last visit, I found that Klosterbräu had the most diverse offerings including a pils, a maibock, and a weizenbier. Then there are Greifenklau, Hopfengarten, and Ambräusianum. I may have missed one or two! If one somehow gets bored with walking around town visiting the breweries in the heart of the city, you can venture out into the Franconian countryside at any one of scores of breweries located in little farming villages or sometimes, literally on farms.

Prague, Czechia — Ryan Pachmayer, head brewer at Yak & Yeti Brewpub and Restaurant

The Beer City:

Czech beer is fantastic. Nobody takes care of the pouring of its beer like the tapsters in the Czechia. The quality of the beer is just higher over there.

What To Drink:

Visit places like Brevnov Monastery, Únětický pivovar, Hostomice Andělský pivovar, and U Fleků. Drink authentic Czech-style lagers. It’s what you’re going to be wowed by. You’ll experience the quality and range of Czech beer that you won’t find anywhere else in the world. And these days, you’ll also be able to sneak a .3l of local IPA once in a while. And since the quality of the beer is already so high, you’ll be pleasantly surprised by their takes on classic and crafty IPAs.

London, UK — Zach Johnston, Drinks Editor UPROXX Life

The Beer City:

London has two things going for it as a great beer city. First, there’s the pub culture wherein every neighborhood has a few pubs with a few different vibes to suit unique groups of people who want to casually meet friends for a quick pint to people who want to really tie one on. Then there’s the craft scene, which is probably one of the most innovative and diverse in all of Europe. That’s largely thanks to London being so ethnically diverse. People from all over the world are making beer there and it’s rarely bad and almost never boring.

What To Drink:

I like starting out in East London around the Truman Brewery. There’s a massive outdoor food and goods market with vintage shops, skate shops, clubs, bars, and all the food you could possibly imagine. The beer is classic craft from old-school lagers served fresh from a tank to crisp bitters to new-wave IPAs. If you want a classic pub experience (with great food) and fresh Pilsner Urquell, then you have to hit The White Horse in Fulham. From there, I’d hit The Rake in Borough Market for excellent small-scale local craft and great pies, and, finally, end up at The Lyric in Soho for that quintessential small pub experience in the heart of London with an exemplary beer list.

Cologne, Germany — Bryan Donaldson, brewing innovation manager at Lagunitas Brewing Company

The Beer City:

The classic (and in my opinion, best) beer city in Europe is Cologne. I think people should travel there this year and every year (followed closely by Brussels). The culture they have built around their beer style of choice, Kölsch, is truly amazing. There are serving rituals (but not over the top) and a lot of different producers putting their subtle spin on the beer style.

What To Drink:

Kölsch! Some might find it boring drinking only one beer style, but I find the ability to stop in anywhere and find a beautiful glass of beer that I know will be of high quality and especially refreshing is what makes this city so great for beer.

Plzeň, Czechia — Josh Bartlett at Learning to Homebrew

The Beer City:

The fair city ofPlzeň has a special place in my heart as the true birthplace of the Pilsner beer style. Light, crisp, refreshing, and sparkling gold, the pilsner is one of my favorite styles. While you’re there, take a tour of the Pilsner Urquell brewery where the ‘original pilsner!’ is still made today.

What To Drink:

Unlike Prague, which has all the beer your could drink from all over the country, a stop in Plzeň is about one beer, Pilsner Urquell. There are few places better to drink that beer than at the source.

Brussels, Belgium — Zach Johnston, Drinks Editor UPROXX Life

The Beer City:

This is the one city to go to if you’re looking for an immersive beer experience in Europe this year. Between the mussels, pomme frites, and waffles, there’s just a ton of great beer, especially lambic and gueuze (gentle barley/wheat beers with deep tart fermentation). The beauty of Brussels as a beer destination is that you can get iconic beer that usually costs a pretty penny in the U.S. at almost regular beer prices all over the city. That $50 bottle of gueuze might only be $6-$8 in Belgium. That alone is worth the trip. Add in the cobbled streets, excellent restaurants, and pastoral countryside (perfect for bike riding from brewery to brewery) and you have a must-stop destination for beer lovers.

What To Drink:

Brasserie Cantillon on Rue Gheude 56 is usually the first stop and a great one thanks to the old-world vibes and delicious beer. Moeder Lambic Original on Rue de Savoie 68 is the spot to hang out and drink amazing Belgian beers with and like locals. La Fleur en Papier Doré on Rue des Alexiens 55 has a unique charm and a long list of great pours to while away the days alongside classic Belgian beer-influenced dishes. And that’s only scratching the surface.

Leipzig, Germany — Fal Allen from Anderson Valley Brewing Co

The Beer City:

Leipzig, Germany is my pick because it is a hidden gem for beer. Sure, there are other more beer-centric cities in Germany, but Leipzig is a beautiful city with a long and storied history. Dating back to 1015, Leipzig is still a major center for higher learning and the arts. And then there is the beer. Leipzig is home to one of the major beer revolutions in beer history. It is where gose — a local wheat beer with salt and coriander that’s lacto-fermented — became a drinking phenomenon in Europe and has caught the attention of the modern craft beer scene in the U.S.

What To Drink:

There are still several breweries in and around Leipzig that produce gose including Ritterguts, Bayerischer Bahnhof, and the famous home of gose’s rebirth the Gosenschenke Ohne Bedenken. If you are a history buff or just want to drink some unique German beer then Leipzig is well worth the visit.

Dublin, Ireland — Chris Osburn, Senior Drinks Writer UPROXX Life

The Beer City:

While there’s no denying the appeal of some of the big beer cities in Germany, Belgium, and the Czech Republic, my go-to European beer city is Dublin.

What To Drink:

Clearly, the home of Guinness is a huge destination and worth the trip alone, but the city is also home to a ton of craft breweries like The Porterhouse Brewing Company, Rascals Brewing Company (grab some pizza while you’re there as well), and Dublin City Brewing. Add to that the countless bars and pubs serving up pints, fish and chips, and bangers and mash if you’re still on the fence about going to Dublin.

Munich, Germany — Dominique Trolliet, brewer at Wynwood Brewing Co.

The Beer City:

The obvious answer to this question is Munich, Germany. In September, Oktoberfest will take place over two, beer-fueled weeks. It’s the mecca for beer lovers in a bustling city with gorgeous parks and seemingly endless beer halls.

What To Drink:

During Oktoberfest, beer festhalls include but are not limited to Paulaner, Hofbräu, Löwenbräu, and Hacker-Pschorr. Singing and clinking liters of beer with cheerful people at the tables to the right and left of you is an absolute blast. Up to 6,500 people in just one tent all singing and laughing together are definitely the makings for a good time. Oh, and then there is the beer. It’s perfectly brewed, poured, and served as they have been doing for centuries.

[Ed. note: Augustiner Kellers (multiple locations) are one of the best experiences for beer in the city outside of Oktoberfest dates.]

It sounds like a nightmare come to life—having no recollection of a loved one, least of all your own child.

However, this was the situation that Nesh Pillay found herself in. The Toronto-based mom suffered from a long-term brain injury brought on by a car crash, which caused sudden memory loss.

Though Pillay shares multiple aspects of her memory loss journey in her TikTok videos, a clip detailing how she forgot her own 6-year-old daughter, but not her “maternal instinct,” is going viral.

It’s a poignant testament that love remains, even when memory fades.

“Last year the unthinkable happened,” Pillay began, explaining that her memory would reset every minute. She has shared in previous videos that she’d been in a car crash during childhood that was never fully examined, causing her to have several concussions and compounding brain injuries throughout her adult life.

The video goes on to show several moments where Pillay is in the hospital, seemingly after a reset, repeatedly asking if “the child” is okay. Though she doesn’t know the child in question is her own, she finds herself “in panic” over her safety.

“The fear for her well-being was so intense that I often couldn’t sleep at night,” she confesses in a voiceover as she’s seen eagerly asking if she can FaceTime with the little girl. Her loved ones in the hospital try to remind her that Sinead (Pillay’s daughter) is sleeping at the moment but that they can chat in the morning.

While the video is heartbreaking to watch, Pillay notes that “the lesson is nothing—not even memory loss—can impede the love between a mother and her child.”

“Even if one day my brain fails me, she’ll always be in my heart,” she proclaims.

@pillay.nesh Making this one has me sobbing. I cant explain how scared for her I was. #concussion #invisibledisablility #traumaticbraininjury #memoryloss #motherdaughter ♬ Slipping Through My Fingers – From ‘Mamma Mia!’ Original Motion Picture Soundtrack – Meryl Streep & Amanda Seyfried

The video racked up a ton of comments from people showing their support, many of whom likened it to those who have dementia remembering their loved ones.

“THAT is unconditional love, not even memory loss can break it,” one person wrote.

Another added, “I work hospice. Even with Alzheimer’s I’ve seen moms who don’t remember anything/anyone but they see their adult children and go ‘that’s my person.’”

Pillay shared in a subsequent video an equally touching exchange between her and her siblings, whom she remembered only as children.

“Why are you a grown-up?” she asks her sisters, voice shaking. “You’re so beautiful. When did you grow up?”

It really is a bittersweet, yet undeniably beautiful example of love’s enduring impact.

@pillay.nesh

In addition to forgetting my partner and child when I lost my memory, I was surprised to find my younger sisters grown up. Yes, they really are beautiful ❤️

♬ original sound – Nesh Pillay

As for Pillay now, she tells CTV News Toronto that there’s no knowing when or if complete normalcy will ever return and that recovery is full of “good brain days” and “bad brain days.” And yet, on even the worst days, her emotional memory seems to remain intact. Even her fiancé, who Pillay first thought was her Uber driver, felt instantly safe, she recalled.

Thanks to Pillay for being open to sharing this experience. It might be of comfort and insight to those going through something similar.

Becoming a parent is many things—exciting, scary, joyful, messy, wonder-filled, smelly—but mostly it’s a bit overwhelming. Even if you are thrilled with having a baby, there’s a lot you have to learn and figure out as you go. To help you through that learning process, there are about a thousand parenting books filled with “expert” advice, at least half of which simply won’t work for you or your kid.

Genuinely universally helpful parenting advice is a unicorn; it simply doesn’t exist. But occasionally, a golden piece of age-old child-rearing wisdom manages to break through the noise—something that works most of the time for most kids and parents. Something your grandma or auntie passed along that sounds too simple to be effective, yet works like a charm. Something that few if any people could possibly find controversial or problematic.

Something like: “Put them in water or take them outside.”

This advice was highlighted by The Motherhood Project in 2021 and has been shared on Facebook more than 123,000 times.

The “water or outside” advice is generally used for babies or toddlers who are inconsolable, as wee ones are known for screaming like banshees for no apparent reason and throwing conniption fits with no apparent prompting.

“Apparent” is the key here, of course—logically, there must be some reason for wailing as if being tortured—but most babies and most toddlers aren’t able to verbally articulate their issue, and sometimes that issue might be as simple as “I don’t want to be where I am or doing what I’m doing.”

Once you’ve determined the kiddo is not injured in some way, “Put them in water or take the outside” is solid advice that often works when all else fails. And thankfully, it’s effective for tiny people as well as older kids (and honestly, sometimes even teenagers). A bath, pool or shower is often just the distraction or soothing sensory experience needed to snap them out of whatever mood they’re in. And fresh air and sunlight are simple human needs that many of us neglect too often—a reality that becomes all too clear when you take kids outside and the drama all melts away within minutes.

Of course, there are caveats here. Some babies absolutely hate the bath. Some kids have sensory issues that are triggered by certain outdoor environments. So it’s not universally foolproof, but it’s definitely worth trying.

Countless commenters testified to the efficacy of the “put them in water or take them outside” advice.

“I didn’t hear this until after I had my 2nd baby,” wrote one mom. “I used it with my 3rd often, and it truly does work. So mad I heard a lot of terrible advice before learning this one!”

“Yes!! And I even give my daughter a bath during dinner time and feed her in the bath sometimes cause she gets so hangry she can’t calm down enough to eat. But in the bath, she naturally calms down enough to eat while she’s playing. She’s almost 5 and we’ve been doing this most of her life. Even did it tonight again,” shared another mother.

One mom shared that it works with her older autistic son: “When my 12 year old autistic son gets overly fractious he either goes in the bath or goes outside……. always works .”

Another expanded the idea to “just add water,” including things like watercolor, playing in the sink, etc.: “I have heard the phrase ‘just add water’ as well. When things are crazy just think of ways to add water to it. Waterpaints, playing with the hose outside, taking a bath, filling the sink up and adding toys, fill small Tupperware bowls with water and let their imagination go wild, taking a drink, giving them a wet paper towel for ouchies, etc. It’s one of my favorite pieces of advice I’ve gotten.”

Some parents shared that holding their colicky newborn in the shower was the only thing that helped calm them down. Others said that baths were a sanity saver for their kids’ entire early childhoods. Some said that simply stepping outside with a cranky baby was enough to get them to stop fussing most of the time.

It’s good advice for us adults, too, when we’re feeling frazzled. Soaking in a tub or going for a walk seem like such simple things, but they really can make a huge difference in how we feel and how we view things.

Add water or go outside: A solid tip for new parents and a great life hack for all ages.