Month: June 2023

Even with a literal ray of sunshine like Drew Barrymore, lightning has to strike once in a while. Especially when it comes to words being twisted by the media.

In a recent interview with “New York Magazine,” Barrymore offered some heartfelt honesty regarding the complicated relationship with her mother and former manager, Jaid Barrymore, as she has done several times before.

After the interview came out, certain news outlets extrapolated a statement by Barrymore to create salacious headlines, presumably for clicks, that claimed the “50 First Dates” star “admitted” that she “wished her mom was dead.”

Barrymore, who has already had more than her fair share of exploitation by the media, was simply not having it.

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In a heated Instagram post, Barrymore held no punches as she was quick to remind the tabloids that the tumultuous details of her childhood have been a source of news fodder. Then she proceeded to tear them a new one.

“To all you tabloids out there, you have been fucking with my life since I was 13 years old. I have never said that I wish my mother was dead. How dare you put those words in my mouth!”

See on Instagram

What Barrymore actually said was that she didn’t have the “luxury” that many other previous child actors who went through similar tumultuous childhoods had—of being able to cleanly process that trauma after a parent had passed. Instead, she has to process while maintaining a relationship with her mother, who is still alive.

Her words were: “All their moms are gone, and my mom’s not. And I’m like, ‘Well, I don’t have that luxury.’ But I cannot wait. I don’t want to live in a state where I wish someone to be gone sooner than they’re meant to be so I can grow. I actually want her to be happy and thrive and be healthy. But I have to fucking grow in spite of her being on this planet.”

Knowing this, her anger certainly seems justified. It’s clear that Barrymore in no way meant that she was “excited” to see her mother die.

“I have been vulnerable and tried to figure out a very difficult, painful relationship while admitting it is difficult to do while a parent is alive,” she said in the Instagram video. “Don’t twist my words around or ever say that I wish my mother was dead. I have never said that. I never would.”

See on Instagram

It’s no secret that humans are quicker to pay attention to stimuli that is negative, and news sources vying for said attention often use that to their advantage with eye-catching, emotion-inducing headlines. And look, no one knows the importance of compelling headlines like the writers at Upworthy—without them, readers will simply keep scrolling, and valuable stories won’t get read.

However, intriguing a potential reader to engage with a story we find worth sharing and falsifying information for the sake of clicks are two completely different things. And in this case, it not only feeds off of someone’s trauma, it can damage their character in the process.

Luckily, Barrymore handled the situation like a champ and was quick to get support after sending her video—both from fans and fellow celebs alike.

Jennifer Garner, a long-time friend of Barrymore, wrote, “You’re brave and real and I adore you xxx”

“Yes, let them have it!” Jennifer Hewitt chimed in.

Model and host Padma Laksmi also wrote, “Ugh. So sorry. We all knew what you meant. Thank you for your vulnerability always ❤️”

It’s great that Barrymore had the fortitude to respond the way she did. But in all reality, she shouldn’t have to respond to something like this in the first place.

We all know that Upworthy loves a good hero story. Suddenly humanity seems a little less dark after hearing about students coming to their teacher’s rescue, moms taking on entire swarms of bees to keep their kids safe or entire bank heists being thwarted by a single hug.

However, we rarely get a glimpse of what happens after those feel-good stories take place. It’s not often that we get to witness firsthand the lasting impact made from one good deed. That’s what makes this story so special.

Xavier Dimples was only 2 years old when his house caught fire, leaving him trapped inside. Without a firefighter named Jeff Ohs bravely entering the burning building to pull the toddler out of the wreckage and resuscitating him, Dimples would have perished.

Twenty-three years after the incident, Dimples was able to reunite with Ohs, introducing him to his son who was the exact same age as Dimples when Ohs rescued him.

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“After I was resuscitated I was in a coma for a month after that. I could never repay [Ohs] for giving me a chance at life, I can only live a great life for him & my son. I owe him my life,” Dimples wrote on Twitter, along with a side-by-side photo showing him as a toddler in the firefighter’s arms and a picture of Ohs holding his two-year-old.

When I was 2 years old my house caught on fire & I was trapped inside, I ended up dying that day & this firefighter, Jeff Ohs, saved me from that building & brought my back to life. Now 23 years later he is holding my 2 year old son. I literally wouldn’t be here without him pic.twitter.com/FLxmKG19DF

— XD (@XavierDimples) May 30, 2023

The moment was equally profound for Ohs. Soon after Dimples published this post, Ohs replied. “Dude!!!! You are a fighter through and through. And honestly you scared the sh*t out of me that day. So so blessed for the outcome. Love you guys.”

“I thank God that you lived to tell your story. I thank God for my firefighter brother Jeff! Sometimes firefighters/medics don’t always know the outcome of the ppl they rescue once they’re delivered to the hospital. But hearing [your] story brings tears to my eyes!” one person wrote.

“The look on her face in the older picture? He’s definitely determined not to let you go down. I’m so happy that he got you back!” added another.

“I worked with Jeff and I know his story well. You make our jobs worth everything we go through. Thank you for sharing,” a former coworker of Ohs commented.

Since that fateful day a little over two decades ago, Dimples and Ohs have been friends. Dimples later quipped that he could pull up to Ohs’ house right now if he wanted. That kind of closure is rare. Firefighters risk their lives for complete strangers out of a genuine desire to help, but they don’t often get to see how their efforts truly paid off. This must have been such a rewarding experience for Ohs.

We never really know where any of our good deeds may lead. But knowing the results isn’t what drives people to commit brave acts. It’s that impulse we all have to help one another and the inner knowing that somehow we are inexplicably connected. The impulse is louder for some than others, or more or less frequent, but answering it can lead to amazing things.

When people decide to get married, the primary focus in the relationship often becomes the wedding. There are so many details to think about—the venue, the guest list, the food, the wedding party, the dress and tux…it’s practically a full-time job, especially if you’re going big.

Planning a wedding can be so time-consuming that a lot of couples neglect to prepare for the more important thing—their actual marriage. Most people understand that marriage is a long-term commitment, but many people go into it without a solid understanding of what that commitment entails and without preparing their relationship for long-term success.

That’s the impetus behind Jimmy Knowles’ (aka “Jimmy on Relationships”) viral take on pre-marital counseling. Knowles’ video titled “The Premarital Counseling I Wish I Had YEARS Ago” has been viewed over a million times on Facebook, and judging by the comments, he nailed what every soon-to-be-married couple needs to hear.

In the video, a couple is visiting with a counselor for premarital counseling. All three characters are played by Knowles himself, which is quite entertaining, but his counseling advice is spot on.

After asking the couple if they’re excited about their wedding, the counselor says, “Yeah, it’s meaningless. Your wedding—it has nothing to do with the success of your relationship. I’m not going to say it’s a waste of $20,000, unless of course you get divorced a few years later, which 50% of people do. So your marriage is practically a coin flip.”

That may sound cynical and pessimistic, but Jimmy the Counselor is anything but. His point is that people spent all this time and energy planning their wedding and almost no time preparing their relationship to last long-term. Then he goes into all kinds of reasons why relationships fail, from people not having healthy relationship models to toxic and problematic behaviors that they themselves might not even be aware of.

As he lays all of this out for the couple, they appear to be taken aback. And when he asks them what they’re going to do that’s different from people who end up divorced or in unfulfilling, unhealthy marriages, they respond that what’s different about them is that they’re “in love.”

“Wrong,” Jimmy responds. “Everyone’s in love on their wedding day. Do you know why 50% of those marriages fail? Because they didn’t know what love required of them—service, selflessness, sacrifice. Not one-sided. Mutual.”

“They didn’t have a plan to get things right,” he adds. “And they didn’t have a plan for what to do when things got hard and stressful, which they always do eventually.”

Counselor Jimmy (who is not a real counselor, for the record) pulls no punches, but he delivers the reality of marriage in a way that both highlights what it requires and also what’s really beautiful about it.

In less than 10 minutes, he manages to entertain while also dropping a crapton of solid truth and advice that would help anyone who is planning on getting married—or even people who are already married—strengthen their relationship.

Watch:

People in the comments expressed their appreciation for the free marital counseling.

“As a child of divorce and someone who just celebrated our 20th anniversary, I wholeheartedly agree with every single word,” shared one commenter. “Fantastic wisdom here. I can’t say we’ve never hurt each other in conflict, but we have the commitment and care to put in the work and grow through what we’re going through.”

“This is really good advice,” shared another. “We got married at 17, pregnant, no money with broken childhoods. I thought it was love that got us through all our traumas. But listening to this guy, I realize because we love each other, the talking, the intimacy, the respect and care we gave came naturally. Even now, after over 40 years together, we try not to take it for granted, we still show affection and support.”

“This is how my marriage survived and thrived for 25 years, 1 week, and 6 days,” shared another. “The day my husband passed away at age 49. A marriage really does take work, but it’s so worth it and knowing it’s a shared experience of love…”

You can find more relationship wisdom from Jimmy on YouTube, Facebook, Instagram and TikTok.

Scientific discoveries and technological advancements have always been a double-edged sword. Nuclear fission gave us a powerful source of clean energy and as well as the most destructive weapons humanity has ever seen. The internet gave us unparalleled access to the entire library of human knowledge and also unparalleled exploitation and porn. Social media has connected people around the world in ways previous generations barely dreamed of and also resulted in a toxic online culture that threatens to shred the fabric of society.

Now, after several dozen movies imagining the best and worst-case scenarios, we’re at that fork in the road with Artificial Intelligence. The sudden leap in AI tech hitting the mainstream has us all wondering what comes next. But for all the AI fear and uncertainty, there are some pretty incredible, humanity-boosting ways it is being used that may signal some hope for that future.

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For instance, AI is allowing facial expressions to control computers. Case in point: a project inspired by quadriplegic video game streamer Lance Carr, whose rare form of muscular dystrophy only allows him to control his face and head movements. Carr had been using a head-tracking mouse (an expensive piece of accessibility equipment controlled by head movement) for gaming, but after his house caught fire during a livestream on Twitch in 2021, he lost everything.

“Video games are my link to the world,” Carr explained in a video describing the project. “But I had to stop gaming because this house burnt down along with my adaptive equipment.”

Carr got connected with some folks at Google to co-design Project Gameface, a fittingly-named tool that allows users to use facial movements as game controls. Linking several different AI models together, the project uses a mesh of 468 points on your face and converts them into telemetry to make mouse movements and clicks. For instance, raising your eyebrows can make the mouse drag or click and opening your mouth can move the cursor.

The best part is that since the project is open source and only requires a webcam for input, it will be widely accessible to people who want or need to use it. And for those who don’t have full use of their limbs, it may be a game-changer as it has been for Carr.

“Muscular dystrophy takes, and this actually added an ability,” he said. “So it’s the first time I’ve gained something in a physical sense.” He shared that the technology is so precise that he’s able to write his name in cursive using only his face through a webcam.

Watch:

Though Google says it’s still in development, they have made it available for preview through GitHub for people who want to give it a spin and help contribute to its improvement.

The potential dangers of AI may be making people nervous, but let’s be sure not to throw the baby out with the bathwater. In the hands of people who are focused on helping humanity progress wisely and responsibly, AI can be a powerful, life-changing tool that makes people’s lives better.

As Lance Carr said, “My hope is to definitely give this technology to everybody who could use it,” the gamer added. “I just want to make a lot of people’s lives better and easier.”

Here’s to those using ever-advancing technology for good.

The Flash was supposed to be a sure thing. Warner Bros. Discovery so believed in the big solo film for Justice League member Barry Allen that they stood by Ezra Miller, its troubled star, through thick and thin — even as they pulled the plug on the nearly completed Batgirl. The film, they hoped, would help save the flailing DCEU. It was supposed to be massive. And then came opening weekend, when it was up to moviegoers to decide its fate.

They showed up alright, but not in the numbers WBD had hoped. The corporation was hoping for $70-$75 million opening weekend. As per Deadline, they got $55.1 million. For the four-day holiday weekend, the projection is only $64 million. Not even the Cinemascore is that good, with audiences giving it only a B.

What happened will be debated in the days and weeks and months to come. Perhaps Miller’s antics — running amok in Hawaii, robbery, possibly starting a cult, before finally agreeing to seek help last summer — may have done even more damage to the film’s reputation than once assumed. Perhaps few were that excited to see a Flash movie, even one that brings back an old Batman. Perhaps superhero fatigue is truly setting in.

In other news, Pixar had a rare bomb with Elemental, which only scared up $29.5 million (but which nabbed an A on Cinemascore). At least Asteroid City, the latest from Wes Anderson, had great news. Opening in only six locations, it made $790K over three days, with its four day tally estimated to be $890K. That gives it the best per-screen average since La La Land in 2016.

(Via Deadline)

Nikola Jokic has ridden quite an emotional rollercoaster this week, going from the high of winning his first NBA title to the low of learning he cannot simply go home and hang out with his horses because of the championship parade to finding out that, actually, he loves championship parades.

The two-time MVP even stuck around for the post-parade celebration in Vegas, where he danced and was apparently the reason Bruce Brown was non-functional the next morning.

However, the clock was ticking on his return home as he had business to attend to on Sunday. That’s the day his beloved horses race, as he explained to the NBA TV panel on Monday night after winning the title, joking he might need to borrow the team plane to get him back home in time for the races. Whether he got the Kroenke’s plane or managed to make his own travel arrangements, he was able to do just that on Sunday, as he was in attendance to watch his horses in action.

For one, this is an incredible fit he’s pulling off, looking like a gigantic, Serbian Adam Sandler with a polo, yellow gym shorts, and a very good “No Jokic” hat. Hopefully his horses did well, but this is a man who looks like he has a good time at the track no matter the outcome and will be back each Sunday throughout the summer now that his job is done.

“Make America Great Again” may be Donald Trump’s official slogan, but he has a favorite chant, too. During his 2016 campaign, the then-future president pounced on Hillary Clinton’s alleged mishandling of classified information. Thus “Lock her up!” was born. Not only was Trump wrong about Clinton, who was later cleared of any wrongdoing, but it might come back to bite him in the butt now that he’s been accused of [drum roll] mishandling classified information.

As per The Wall Street Journal, the case brought against Trump by Jack Smith has to prove that Trump knew that the boxes of documents he held onto “could be harmful to the U.S. if shared, mishandled or misplaced.” How does one prove that? Well, look at his old campaign speeches:

Drawing on Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign against Clinton, who was the Democratic nominee, Smith’s team has a trove of evidence in the form of Trump’s own words that can be presented to the jury to argue that Trump knew there were serious penalties for mishandling national-security information and should have known better than to leave the White House with boxes full of nuclear secrets, military plans and intelligence reports, as the indictment alleges.

Indeed, five separate statements Trump made during his 2016 campaign were amongst the evidence used when he was hit with criminal charges. Should the case go to trial, they could all be used as evidence against him. In one of those statements, from August 18 of that year, Trump was pretty clear: “In my administration I’m going to enforce all laws concerning the protection of classified information. No one will be above the law.”

In other words: Whoops.

(Via WSJ)

Friendship is wonderful. In my four decades, I’ve had more than my fair share of close, supportive, ride-or-die friends who have helped shape me and carry me through it all. Friendship has played a huge role in my life, which is why the viral “7 friends theory” social media trend caught my eye.

It’s also why I’m calling b.s. on the whole idea.

The “7 friends theory” posits that there are seven friends you need in your life:

1. The friend you’ve had since you were little
2. The friend who makes you laugh in all situations
3. The friend you might not talk to for a long time, but nothing changes
4. The friend you can tell anything without judgment
5. The friend who feels like a sister (or brother)
6. The friend you can’t imagine not being your life
7. The friend you share all of your dating/relationship problems with.

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The wording on this seven-item checklist changes slightly with different videos, but the gist is always the same. Here are a few examples that got millions of views on TikTok:

@slothyrach

luv this💛🥰😁 #CapCut

@lysscausey

7 bridesmaids for a reason 🥹🤍#CapCut #bride #married #wedding #bridesmaids #7friendtheory #2023bride #bestfriend

Seems nice, doesn’t it? With all the warm vibes and the feel-good music and the sweet friendship photos?

Sorry to burst anyone’s bubble here, but this trend isn’t as cute and harmless as it seems. Friendship? Yay. Seven specific kinds of friends? Boo.

First of all, this is based on nothing. There’s no research on friendship behind this “theory.” It’s just something someone made up. That alone doesn’t make it problematic, but let’s at least start by calling it what it is.

Secondly, if we’re going to ascribe a specific number to something, there should be a legitimate reason for doing so. Otherwise, it’s meaningless at best and creates anxiety at worst. What if you don’t have these exact seven kinds of friends? Are you missing something in life? Will you never have the soundtrack-backed warm glow of these bestie moments if you only have, say, four good friends? What if you have friends who don’t really fit any of these categories? Are those friendships less than?

Numbering something should be purposeful, and the number seven is totally arbitrary here. Great for getting people to click on a video, but not so great for actually analyzing friendships.

Speaking of analyzing, what exactly is the value in categorizing friendship in this way? Different friends fulfill different roles and meet different needs in our lives, so I’m not saying all friendships are the same, but that’s not the same as saying you need friends who fit specific categories.

And if we are going to create specific categories, there’s a whole lot that are missing here. Where’s the friend who organizes the meal train when you’re sick or grieving? The friend who checks in when you’ve gone quiet for a while? The friend who always tells you the truth even when you don’t want to hear it? The friend you want with you in the delivery room? The friend you can happily sit in total silence with?

There are just so many different ways that friendship can be experienced and expressed, why specify these seven? Again, it’s totally arbitrary, especially when most friends fit multiple categories anyway.

We already have enough idealistic standards being pushed on us by social media, and this feels like just one more. It’s especially problematic for young people, and they’re the ones who are making and responding to these videos. How many teens are now looking at their own friendships and feeling bad that they don’t have seven close friends or that one or more of those categories remain unfulfilled for them?

Tip for the young folks: Don’t let this kind of thing seep into your psyche. Not even a little bit.

One thing you learn with time and experience is that most friendships shift, morph and change, and that’s OK. Some friendships are strong for a few seasons and then life moves you in different directions. The love doesn’t leave, but the everyday closeness does. That’s OK. Some friendships go through peaks and valleys and some friendships disappear and reemerge over and over. That’s OK, too.

Some people find they only have and only need a tiny handful of friends. Some people collect friendships like baseball cards. It’s all OK. Friendship doesn’t have to look a specific way or fulfill some arbitrary criteria in order to have value to us.

The “7 friends theory” may make for some cute, clickable social media virality, but it’s more harmful than helpful when it comes to friendship. Be happy with the friends you have in the moment, don’t count or overanalyze them and definitely don’t let TikTok trends influence how you feel about yourself or the people you love.

No other mammal is as varied in size, shape, color and features as domestic dogs. If you put a Chihuahua and a Puli in front of an alien, they would never guess they were the same kind of animal. Seriously, how can a Dachshund, a Poodle and a Samoyed all be the same species?

Some dog breed origins are somewhat discernible by the location clues in their names, such as Newfoundlands, Labrador Retrievers, Alaskan Malamutes and Great Danes. Other names have recognizable regional language roots, like the Shih Tzu and Shiba Inu. We associate Poodles with the French and Huskies with the Arctic, but there are over 450 dog breeds the world over. Where did they all come from?

It could take hours to explore the vast history of dog breeds, but a video from BioArk offers a fascinating and entertaining overview in less than 20 minutes.

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The story of domesticated dogs began more than 23,000 years ago when nomadic peoples started giving wolves table scraps. Since then, dogs have evolved alongside humans as our loyal companions, hunting helpers and protectors, but most modern dog breeds bear little resemblance to their wolf ancestors.

Some evolutionary change and adaptation are to be expected over thousands of years, of course, but that doesn’t explain the enormous variety in dog breeds in a relatively short period of time. While dog breeds originated on basically every continent, a good percentage of the dogs we know today came from what’s known as the Victorian Explosion, when intentional dog breeding intensified and expanded in the British Isles in the 19th century. Even so, as the video explains, each dog breed’s unique history almost acts like a microcosm of the history of the culture it came from.

Check out BioArk’s “Where Every Dog Breed Came From” for the full overview:

Music festivals are supposed to be one of the most joyous parts of summer. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case for nearly a half-dozen attendees at Beyond Wonderland 2023. According to CNN, two people attending the electronic dance music festival were tragically killed, while three others were injured following a mass shooting on Saturday, June 17.

The event held at The Gorge (also known as Gorge Amphitheatre) in Washington State was slated to be a multi-day experience for electronic music lovers from across the world. It’s not the first music event to end fatally, whether at a venue or at open grounds.

Beyond Wonderland released a statement saying there “was no current danger to festivalgoers or the campgrounds.” But as more details began to surface, that quickly changed.

Eventually festival heads reached a major decision. “Due to the incident that took place in the overflow camping area last night, we regret to inform you that day two of Beyond Wonderland at The Gorge has been canceled,” they said in a subsequent statement.

They also shared compassion with the victims of the shooting. “We would like to express our sincere appreciation to the local authorities and staff who acted quickly to manage that situation. Our heartfelt thoughts and condolences go out to the family, friends, and all those affected by the tragic event,” wrote a festival representative.