Month: August 2023

Next month, on September 2, The 1975’s self-titled debut album is turning ten years old. A full decade. Because of this upcoming anniversary, the band is celebrating with some special reissues.

Presented in a range of formats from vinyl and CD to cassette, The 1975 provided a few different selections to choose from currently. There is a limited-edition 2LP solid white pressing with the standard tracklist — and the cassette version follows a similar format. There is also another 4LP on black vinyl that includes the self-titled deluxe tracks.

The anniversary CD version includes the album’s standard tracks, plus their corresponding live performances that were recorded during The 1975’s set at Manchester’s Gorilla venue — where they played in February.

Finally, The 1975 also shared some other special ten-year merch, like a vinyl slipmat and a hoodie. All items are currently available through their website and slated to ship out to fans at different points next month.

At the time of the album’s original release in 2013, it reached No.1 on the UK charts. “This album is a soundtrack to our formative years, so it would be dishonest to not put songs on there that we wrote when we were 21, as we want people to connect to it in the same way that we do,” lead singer Matty Healy shared the year prior during an interview with Where The Gramophone Rings.

Atlanta rock rapper Destroy Lonely dropped his debut studio album, If Looks Could Kill, in May, debuting at No. 18 on the Billboard 200 and selling 29,000 album-equivalent units in its first week. He continues to promote the album, releasing the video for the standout track “How U Feel?” today.

The video takes on imagery from such wide-ranging influences as the Sam Raimi Spider-Man series and assassin action dramas like Nikita and Mr. And Mrs. Smith. Destroy Lonely and his girls load up their weapons and hop in an SUV, presumably for a late-night murder mission.

The song “How U Feel?” was recently featured in the film Insidious: The Red Door, reflecting the horror film aesthetics embraced by the Opium rapper on his debut. Meanwhile, Destroy Lonely is also rising quickly, collaborating with breakout artist PinkPanthress for “Turn Your Phone Off.” He’s also on tour with Opium founder Playboi Carti and the rest of his labelmates later this year.

Watch Destroy Lonely’s “How U Feel?” video above. You can see the tour dates below.

09/06/2023 — Denver, CO @ Ball Arena
09/08/2023 — Salt Lake City, UT @ Delta Center
09/09/2023 — Las Vegas, NV @ MGM Grand Garden Arena
09/12/2023 — Seattle, WA @ Climate Pledge Arena
09/13/2023 — Portland, OR @ Veterans Memorial Coliseum
09/15/2023 — Sacramento, CA @ Golden 1 Center
09/16/2023 — San Francisco, CA @ Chase Center*~
09/17/2023 — San Diego, CA @ Pechanga Arena San Diego
09/20/2023 — Los Angeles, CA @ Crypto.com Arena
09/23/2023 — Glendale, AZ @ Desert Diamond Arena
09/26/2023 — Austin, TX @ Moody Center
09/27/2023 — Houston, TX @ Toyota Center
09/28/2023 — Dallas, TX @ American Airlines Center
09/30/2023 — Kansas City, MO @ T-Mobile Center
10/01/2023 — Minneapolis, MN @ Target Center
10/02/2023 — Chicago, IL @ United Center*
10/04/2023 — Detroit, MI @ Little Caesars Arena
10/05/2023 — Columbus, OH @ Schottenstein Center
10/06/2023 — Philadelphia, PA @ Wells Fargo Center
10/07/2023 — Boston, MA @ TD Garden
10/09/2023 — Washington, DC @ Capital One Arena
10/11/2023 — New York, NY @ Madison Square Garden
10/13/2023 — Pittsburgh, PA @ PPG Paints Arena
10/14/2023 — Indianapolis, IN @ Gainbridge Fieldhouse
10/15/2023 — Cleveland, OH @ Rocket Mortgage Fieldhouse
10/17/2023 — Raleigh, NC @ PNC Arena
10/18/2023 — Charlotte, NC @ Spectrum Center
10/20/2023 — Atlanta, GA @ State Farm Arena
11/19/2023 — Dublin, IE @ 3Arena
11/21/2023 — Manchester, UK @ AO Arena
11/22/2023 — London, UK @ The O2
11/24/2023 — Brussels, BE @ Forest National
11/25/2023 — Amsterdam, NL @ Ziggo Dome
11/27/2023 — Milan, IT @ Mediolanum Forum
11/29/2023 — Cologne, DE @ Lanxess Arena
11/30/2023 — Berlin, DE @ Mercedes-Benz Arena
12/02/2023 — Paris, FR @ AccorHotels Arena
12/04/2023 — Copenhagen, DK @ Royal Arena

As Hollywood and the hip-hop world react to the untimely passing of Euphoria star Angus Cloud, a new report has confirmed that the young actor completed work on two upcoming films shortly before his death.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Cloud wrapped his “star turn” in Universal’s untitled monster movie from the Radio Silence directing team. He also competed work on the upcoming thriller Your Lucky Day, which is still hashing out its premiere strategy and release date.

Here are the details for the untitled monster flick, which was set to hit in 2024 alongside Euphoria Season 3. However, both may see delays from the dual writers’ and actors’ strike, and now, Cloud’s death.

Via THR:

Plot details are being kept under wraps, but the project was at one point titled Dracula’s Daughter and centered on a group of kidnappers who abduct a band of young people, one of whom ends up being the titular character.

As for Your Lucky Day, THR reports that the film set on Christmas Eve “centers on a hostage situation at a small convenience store over a winning lottery ticket worth $156 million, with events quickly spinning out of control as greed takes hold.”

Cloud is also attached to Freaky Tales from Captain Marvel directors Ryan Fleck and Anna Boden and starring Pedro Pascal and Ben Mendelsohn. The film was already in post-production before Cloud’s shocking death at age 25.

(Via The Hollywood Reporter)

Back in 2018, when I wrote a guide to Keto-Friendly Fast Food, I wrote that the diet was a “disciplined, rules-based way to make your life miserable and potentially lose weight.” But that was before keto really took off. In 2018, Fast Food menus weren’t catering to the keto lifestyle like they are today, requiring you to hack menu items and straight up throw bread away.

In 2023, a handful of fast food menus actually have entire keto-focused menus. The game has officially changed.

It’s never been easier to take on a keto diet, assuming you have the discipline to forgo those delicious delicious carbs. This year we broke down five of the healthiest and unhealthiest fast food dishes and now, in an effort to help you navigate the fast food keto universe, we’re going to break down five of the most popular keto-friendly dishes and rank them from least to most delicious.

Before we dive in, we’d like to note that if you’re experimenting with a keto diet, remember that everyone’s body and nutritional needs differ by age, body fat percentage, height, and lifestyle, and guidelines might differ whether you’re trying to lose or maintain weight or gain muscle. Because of that, it’s smart to consult a keto calculator to help paint a better picture of what works for you.

Now, on to the food!

• We Blind Tested Bacon Double Cheeseburgers In Search Of The Most Decadent & Delicious
• We Tasted Breakfast Sandwiches Blind To Find The Very Best Fast Food Day-Starter
• We Blind Tested Fast Food French Fries — Here’s The Stone Cold Champ
• We Blind Taste Tested Fast Food Chicken Nuggets — And The Crown Goes To…
• We Blind Tested Fast Food Chocolate Milkshakes — Here’s The Undisputed Champ

5. Chick-fil-A — 12 Count Grilled Nuggets

Calories: 200
Fat: 4.5g
Carbs: 2g
Protein: 28g

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Don’t order a Chick-fil-A Grilled Chicken sandwich without a bun when you can just order the nuggets. The nuggets are juicier than the sandwich filet and you’re going to need that juiciness because you’re dealing with grilled chicken here.

Despite looking boring and totally unappetizing, these grilled nuggets are surprisingly delicious. They’re pickle brine marinated, with an herbal and slightly lemon-tinged flavor. Those char marks don’t impart any flavor, which is a shame, but I suppose I’d rather the chicken have the char marks than be completely naked, that might actually make them look even blander.

The Bottom Line:

Delicious, protein-packed, and lean. Need to beef up your meal? Order a side salad, toss the dressing and croutons, and grab an unsweetened iced team. Bam, you got a whole meal going, baby!

4. Popeyes — 5 Count Blackened Chicken

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A post shared by Taylor (@level.up.keto)

Calories: 280
Fat: 3g
Carbs: 3g
Protein: 43g

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Yes, I think Chick-fil-A’s grilled nuggets are delicious, and having chicken that isn’t fried in dirty oil is probably a pretty good health decision, but when it comes to flavor, it’s hard to beat Popeyes Blackened Chicken. To the naked eye, these look straight-up battered, but they aren’t. Instead, Popeyes marinates this chicken in its usual buttermilk marinade and then dusts it in blackened seasoning before dropping it straight into the fryer.

This results in a delicious and flavorful natural crust that captures some of the magic of battered chicken. While you’ll miss the craggy outer of typical Popeyes chicken, what you get here is a blend of earthy black pepper, garlic, and onion flavors that come across as fragrant, floral, and zesty. It’s an experience for the senses, all while being totally keto-friendly.

The Bottom Line:

It’s fried (not breaded), which isn’t the healthiest possible decision. Still, it tastes more delicious than Chick-fil-A’s grilled nuggets, so we’re ranking it higher!

3. El Pollo Loco — Double Chicken Avocado Salad

Calories: 370
Fat: 14g
Carbs: 14g (with dressing)
Protein: 48g

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

There is a lot going on with this salad, and it’s all good stuff! A double serving of chicken gives you a lot of protein and a whole lot of flame-grilled flavor. It’s admittedly a bit dry, but it has a wonderful charred flavor with a zesty citrus-backed seasoning. In addition to the chicken, the salad features buttery slices of ripe avocado, which serves as a second protein source, pumpkin seeds (more protein), some greens for texture, and fresh, mildly spicy pico de Gallo.

The stock salad is served with cilantro dressing, which adds a nice minty flavor, but beefs up the carb content. I don’t think the dressing is entirely necessary, so skipping it won’t ruin your meal, but here is a convenient and delicious hack to provide more flavor: dip your fork in a side of avocado salsa before every forkful. It’ll add a sharp kick of spice and massively elevates the experience.

The Bottom Line:

It’s hard to find a legitimately delicious salad in fast food that you can eat dressing-free, but El Pollo Loco has done it! Order this over the keto-friendly burrito every time!

In-N-Out — Double Double Tomato Wrap

Calories: 520 (with spread)
Fat: 39g (with spread)
Carbs: 11g (with spread)
Protein: 33g (with spread)

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

I wrote about In-N-Out’s Double Double Tomato Wrap in our full ranking of the In-N-Out Secret Menu and I will not stop riding hard for this culinary wonder. I don’t know how many grams of carbs are in the spread alone, In-N-Out doesn’t have that information, but if you want to cut out a couple of grams at least, drop the spread.

The Tomato Wrap makes it so you don’t need it anyway. With this four-tomato slice bun, the Tomato Wrap is juicy to the point of tasting almost too saucy. With grilled onions, this cheeseburger delivers a mix of beefy, salty, and savory flavors, further elevated by a juicy burst of umami thanks to the tomatoes.

Don’t like tomatoes? We feel that, go ahead and get that Protein Style Lettuce Wrap, which takes the juicy elements of this burger and turns it into something a bit more watery but also nice and crisp.

The Bottom Line:

Savory Umami goodness with every bite without any compromises.

1. Chipotle — Uproxx Custom Keto Bowl

Calories: 735
Fat: 44g
Carbs: 16g
Protein: 73g

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Is it fair to put a Chipotle Burrito Bowl build that we published in the past as our number one choice for the best-tasting keto-friendly dish in the fast food universe? Who cares! If what you’re after is flavor and good stats that fit into your keto diet, look no further, this is hands down your best option.

The build is bare-bones and simple: A double serving of chicken (go for the new Chicken Al Pastor if you want a sweeter tropical flavor), a serving of fajitas, guacamole, a light spoon of tomatillo-red chili salsa, and cheese. Admittedly, it doesn’t look great, but the flavor f*cks.

It’s a mix of savory adobo zest, smokey sumptuous flavors, onion, and lime (because you’re at Chipotle), with a nutty sweet, and salty finish. That tomatillo salsa leaves a satisfying burn on your palate that grows with each forkful and makes for an addicting experience that’ll have you scraping the bowl clean. If you can spare the extra carbs (two grams), go ahead and add Sour Cream for an added tangy/ creamy note.

The Bottom Line:

Hands down the best-tasting keto option in the fast food universe. So good it almost tastes like you’re not even dieting.

The status of Travis Scott’s planned Utopia concert at Egypt’s Pyramids Of Giza was in doubt for some time before it was officially canceled last week. He later insisted the show would still happen one way or another, but whether or not that’s still true, Scott has moved on, at least for the moment, to Rome.

He shared an announcement on Twitter today (August 1), revealing he has an event happening in the Italian city on August 7, so next Monday.

Currently, the travisscott.com/live website linked to in the tweet simply features small text reading, “NOT FOUND.” He offered a bit more detail in his Instagram post about the event, though, writing, “FIRST STOP. UTOPIA LIVE AT CIRCUS MAXIMUS. WE OUT !!!!!TIX ON SALE AUGUST 3 10AM CET TRAVISSCOTT.COM/LIVE.” So, it’s not a screening of his Circus Maximus movie, but rather, a concert at the actual Circus Maximus, an ancient Roman chariot-racing stadium that has been used for concerts in modern times, like when Genesis performed there in 2007.

An Egypt show could still happen in the near future, though. In his aforementioned post-cancellation update, Scott wrote, “Egypt at the pyramids will happen But due to demand and detail logistics They just need a bit a time to set lay on lands. I will keep u posted on a date which will be soon love you alllll.”

The Pittsburgh Steelers are in the rebuilding phase, but under Mike Tomlin the expectation is to still be competitive. Tomlin has never had a losing season as head coach of the Steelers, and even as they transition to a young core, they don’t seem particularly interested in bottoming out for a top pick.

This season they’ll start Kenny Pickett in his first full season as starter, after he took over for Mitch Trubisky early in the season as a rookie. Pickett had his ups and downs, but the Steelers will hope to see him show a bit more consistency after a full offseason as the starter. In order to do that, he’ll need some help from his receivers on the outside, with Allen Robinson coming in to add some depth to that group alongside Diontae Johnson and fellow second-year man George Pickens. It’s Pickens who has the most upside of that group, as he flashed an ability to be a big play threat at times in his rookie year, making some incredible catches.

On Tuesday, Pickens showed his full array of talents in one of the most impressive catches we’ll see all camp (and, really, all season). Steelers fan @Mazursky8895 captured the full possession and posted it to Twitter, as Pickens somehow gets out of the straight jacket Joey Porter Jr. had him in for most of the route and makes the insane catch over him.

The best part is Porter Jr. just standing there in disbelief after, with Pickens giving him a good-hearted taunt and handing him the football before celebrating with the rest of the offense. It’s a great rep by Porter Jr. aside from the result, and there’s just nothing he could really do about this. Pickens has stated he thinks he’s the best receiver in football, and when you see him make plays like this it’s hard to question his abilities. The question is more whether he can be a consistent threat, rather than a guy who pops on a play here and there, but Steelers fans have plenty of reason to be excited about Pickens in his second year, provided Kenny Pickett can deliver him the ball.

Rob49 is the latest artist to grace the UPROXX Sessions stage, bringing a fiery performance of his unreleased song “I Realized” to the infamous graffiti wall. The New Orleans rapper’s profile has risen sharply in recent months, with appearances on tracks with G Herbo, Lil Baby, Lil Durk, and Travis Scott under his belt, despite only rapping professionally for about three years. His booming voice and nonstop flow have distinguished him in the street rap scene, along with his gritty storytelling style.

Rob is fresh off the release of his new album, 4GODII, which features appearances from the likes of Birdman, Icewear Vezzo, NoCap, Roddy Ricch, and Trippie Redd. He’s preparing to release the deluxe edition next Friday, August 11, but “I Realized” will remain an UPROXX Sessions exclusive for the time being.

You can watch Rob49’s UPROXX Sessions performance of “I Realized” above.

UPROXX Sessions is Uproxx’s performance show featuring the hottest up-and-coming acts you should keep an eye on. Featuring creative direction from LA promotion collective, Ham On Everything, and taking place on our “bathroom” set designed and painted by Julian Gross, UPROXX Sessions is a showcase of some of our favorite performers, who just might soon be yours, too.

On the eve of the release of his new movie, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem, his first as a feature film director, Jeff Rowe seems really happy. He has reason to be: his movie is getting overwhelmingly positive reviews, which isn’t really something that’s normal for a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. And he, along with producers Seth Rogen and Even Goldberg, are all already on board for a sequel. And yes, that has to be quite the confidence boost before a first movie is even released. (To the point Rowe described himself as a pitcher throwing a no-hitter, then immediately regretted it because he doesn’t understand sports metaphors and didn’t quite realize what exactly he was saying there and didn’t want to come off too confident.)

Ahead, Rowe takes us through what he felt he needed to do to make this Ninja Turtles movie different than the rest. Which sounds like a lot of, as he says, pouring over every line to make sure everything worked – first and foremost to make a good movie, as opposed to a good Turtles movie. And even though his personal favorite Turtle is Michelangelo, he did feel it was important to finally give Leonardo his due. So, as Rowe says ahead, “Leo’s fans, unite. This is your film.”

I assume you knew you had a good movie, but the critical reception has been overwhelmingly positive and you’ve already been asked to make the sequel…

You hope… I think making a film like this, I think part of what makes it successful and what people are responding to is, we worked so hard for so long and we cared about every scene and every line of dialogue and every shot. And everything in the film is really considered and poured over. And I think audiences can feel that when you put that much work into something. You can tell the people making it are having fun and care about what they’re doing, but you do that for years. You put all this work in and you hope people will like it. And it’s validating.

To that point, the first movie that came out in 1990 is actually pretty interesting. But the rest of the films, I don’t feel like every line was poured over and considered. With this one, it does feel people who actually know these characters are in charge now.

I mean, that’s really what we were going for. And I think, also, the team was brave enough to not stick too much to what had been done before. The goal was to make a great film, not a great Ninja Turtles film. The fact that it’s the Ninja Turtles and it’s about these characters and this lore and this world is secondary to the objective of just making something that’s, I think hopefully, moving and entertaining and artistically daring. And that was kind of the goal. And I think you only get to the end result that we have by being willing to break away from the source material when it’s appropriate and when it makes sense.

When did it make sense to break away from the source material?

Backstory stuff. Sometimes a lot of our early conversations were like, “How do we make this world make sense?” Because there was a logic in the comic and then it shifted a little bit in the TV series and then it was completely different in the live-action movie. And what’s explained in the first episode of the animated TV series, which I watched religiously as a child, is if you touch ooze, you mutate into whatever the last animal was that you touched. The logic is so twisted and weird. And there were things like that we’re like, Okay, we have to just make this make sense and make it feel like these characters exist in the real world that has something believable within physics that we know or movie logic that we’re familiar with. Hopefully to create a foundation that would let audiences relate to the characters and connect with them.

You mentioned “artistically daring.” When the comic first came out it felt weird and cool and kind of violent. This movie has that aspect.

I mean, it’s like the Ninja Turtles have always been kind of anarchic. They’ve always been a little bit more punk rock than the other comics.

Well, especially at first. I feel some of the other movies diluted that a bit, but this movie kind of recaptures that vibe.

Well, I think there’s kind of a shift. It was almost pushing Ninja Turtles to be more like Batman or something, or to be more like other superhero stories and be very self-serious.

Yes.

And part of what I loved about the franchise as a kid is that they were funny. They were teenagers! They disrespected adults! My parents were confused about why I liked it and that made me like it more as a kid because it felt something special. It felt like something that I owned and had a special relationship with. And I think you only get that through a reverence and wackiness, and this kind of gonzo, grotesque, inventive art style. And when we were sitting down to do this and we’re like, “Well, Spider-Verse looks really cool. It’s really slick and polished.”

And you just worked with Phil Lord and Christopher Miller on Mitchells and the Machines.

Yeah, yeah. It’s like I kind of knew what those technological tools were and how you can make something look like that. And we’re like, “Well, that’s not these characters and that’s not the vibe that we’re going for.” And making something that was slick and polished wouldn’t tell the story as effectively as making something chaotic and surprising. And we just tried to have the visual style echo that as much as possible, because that’s also what it feels like to be a teenager. It’s kind of an esoteric thing to say, but it’s a confusing time. Your thoughts change a lot rapidly. You’re heavily influenced by the opinions of others. You can be mercurial when you’re a teenager.

Oh, we can all still be mercurial.

Yeah, no, but I feel like that’s when you start becoming that. You’re like, “Wait, maybe I don’t want to be happy all the time.” You’re able to label more complex emotions. And it’s messy. It’s a messy time. And it felt like it deserved a messy art style.

Who was your Turtle?

Michelangelo.

Okay.

I was a Donatello as a kid who just so desperately wanted to be a Michelangelo because he was the funniest one.

Everyone loves Michelangelo and everyone loves Raphael. And I feel Donatello is kind of the George Harrison of the group, where it’s cool to like him. I’m the weirdo who always loved Leonardo. And there’s never been a good Leonardo movie until this one. You finally made one.

Well, that was the thing, because leader characters are hard and usually the most boring character. Like the Red Power Ranger sucks. He is the least interesting of the Power Rangers. Leo is generally the least interesting Turtle. And anytime you have a character that’s like, “Hey guys, let’s follow the rules,” you as an audience member hate that character.

But you cracked it. Leonardo is still a teen and he’s conflicted between Splinter and what the other Turtles want. And this one, he has a love interest. So he’s got all this stuff going on.

We wanted to do right by him as a character and we wanted him to feel like he tries really hard and he really cares. And if he’s the one who’s most loyal to Splinter’s dogma – him being pulled away; being equally and oppositely pulled away into the world of humans is interesting and gives him complex choices to make. And also just feels like real people that I have known in my life, where you’re all about this one thing. And then all of a sudden something else comes along, and you’re like, “All right, I don’t believe in what my family does anymore. I’m into this now.”

I tweeted that this is a good Leo movie and the very few of us seemed excited.

Leo’s fans, unite. This is your film.

When did you find out they wanted you for the sequel? Because that’s got to be quite a confidence boost before this movie even comes out.

I mean, I think Paramount, in rebooting a franchise this big, the hope is that it goes well enough that you can turn this into a whole decade’s worth of films and TV and products. That’s the business model, but you never know. It could take off, or it could flop. And I think halfway through making the film, we had done enough internal screenings that they’re like, “Okay, this is good. This could be good, this could be a hit.” And then I think within the last year, they started to get serious about it and it was kind of just like, if the pitcher is throwing a no-hitter, don’t take him out of the game. You’re not going to find someone other than Seth and Evan to produce it.

You felt like you were throwing a no-hitter?

I shouldn’t say that! I shouldn’t say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s the wrong analogy…

“I am so on my game right now. Of course, I’ll be back.”

I don’t pay attention to sports, so I can’t make sports metaphors, but it was going good. The team was delivering in a way and we were all getting along with each other and still are. I think they’re like, “Okay. If this team is producing this, let’s make another one and let’s try to keep it the same team.” Me and a lot of the artists were open to that. Seth and Evan were open to it. Actually, is this a spoiler interview, or a non-spoiler interview?

[So, for now, we are keeping this a non-spoiler interview, but we’ll have what Rowe says about the end of Mutant Mayhem and what’s in store for the sequel after the film hits theaters.]

You can contact Mike Ryan directly on Twitter.

While Elon Musk is making jokes for 12 years olds on the website formerly known as Twitter, Mark Zuckerberg is preparing for their billionaire brawl (assuming it ever happens). The recently ripped Meta founder is eating 4,000 calories a day as part of his fitness regime, which involves “three to four jiu-jitsu and MMA sessions per week, as well as strength and conditioning work topped off with mobility training,” according to Insider.

In response to a Threads post from McDonald’s asking if “y’all want anything,” Zuckerberg wrote, “20 nuggets, a quarter pounder, large fries, Oreo McFlurry, apple pie, and maybe some side cheeseburgers for later?” He was called out by UFC fighter Mike Davis (“You’re in camp! No Mcdonald’s”) before explaining why he needed so much food. “Not cutting weight so I need ~4000 calories a day to offset all the activity. And it’s so delicious…” Zuckerberg wrote.

Zuckerberg is 39 years old. The Food and Drug Administration recommends that someone his age devour anywhere from 2,400 (for a sedentary lifestyle) to 2,800 (for an active lifestyle) a day. Zuckerberg isn’t consuming as much as The Rock or Michael Phelps when they’re in training mode, but he’s eating the equivalent of two bonus Big Macs over the suggested need.

No wonder McDonald’s fan Donald Trump returned to Facebook, not Twitter.

(Via Insider)

Earlier this spring, Blaiden Kirk posed a question on Twitter that completely derailed our day in the Uproxx Sports Slack room as we debated how many 5-year-olds it would take to tackle Derrick Henry.

It’s a question that can only be answered once a number of other questions are asked, such as: Does Derrick Henry have a conscience about possibly killing 5-year-olds by stomping them and/or stiff-arming them straight to hell? Are these just average 5-year-olds picked at random or are we hand-picking the biggest, strongest 5-year-olds who already have the motor skills to play sports? What is the amount of space Henry has to operate and thus the ground these 5-year-olds have to cover?

This week at Titans training camp, someone set out to get the answer straight from the people who know Henry best, and learned that head coach Mike Vrabel likewise has a lot of these same questions he needs answered before he can put a number on it beyond “a shit ton.”

Ultimately, Vrabel lands on 35 children being able to bring down Henry provided it’s a 10 yard box Henry has to stay in. He does note some may die in the process. Offensive lineman Aaron Brewer thinks the number should be closer to 200, while saying when he was 5 he absolutely would’ve been interested in trying and would’ve been gunning for Henry’s ankles.

I think Brewer’s answer is closer to correct if Henry has a full football field to operate, and honestly, is probably shy of the actual number because he’s going to outrun them and children are easily duped by simply changing direction and reversing the field because they are five and thus have no football IQ like understanding the concepts of tackling angles or weakside contain. Vrabel’s 10-yard box is a provocative thought exercise because it’s basically asking how many it’d take to bring Henry down in an Oklahoma drill, and 35 might be right just simply because he’ll at some point trip over one in a confined space. We will probably never know, although Vrabel does seem open to setting this up at practice provided the guy asking the question has to participate and get trucked by Henry too.