Month: April 2024

Have you ever wondered why people don’t seem to say “you’re welcome” anymore?

The phenomenon has really caught on lately but it’s roots go a back further back. Back in 2015, author and professor Tom Nichols tweeted out an angry response after receiving what he thought was poor customer service:

“Dear Every Cashier in America: the proper response to ‘thank you’ is ‘you’re welcome,’ not ‘no problem.’ And *you’re* supposed to thank *me*”The angry tweet elicited a number of mocking responses from people on social media.

— (@)

But eventually one person chimed in with a detailed and thoughtful response that just might give you pause the next time you or someone you know says, “no problem.”

u201cDear Every Cashier in America: the proper response to “thank you” is “you’re welcome,” not “no problem.” And *you’re* supposed to thank *me*u201d

— Tom Nichols (@Tom Nichols)
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It’s not about being polite. Our views on gratitude are evolving.

In a response that is going viral on Reddit, on person writing under the name “lucasnoahs” laid it all out:

Actually the “you’re welcome/no problem” issue is simply a linguistics misunderstanding. Older ppl tend to say “you’re welcome,” younger ppl tend to say “no problem.” This is because for older people the act of helping or assisting someone is seen as a task that is not expected of them, but is them doing extra, so it’s them saying, “I accept your thanks because I know I deserve it.”

“No problem,” however, is used because younger people feel not only that helping or assisting someone is a given and expected but also that it should be stressed that you’re need for help was no burden to them (even if it was).

Basically, older people think help is a gift you give, younger people think help is an expectation required of them.

Nichols took a lot of flack for his comment. But the insightful response reveals something important about gratitude.

The thoughtful response from “lucasnoahs” doesn’t apply to everyone. After all, there are certainly a lot of people of any age group for whom acts of kindness and gestures of gratitude are “no problem.”

Still, his message conveys an important idea that doing well for others does not have to be a grand gesture. It can be a simple act — and the additional act of letting someone know that it’s really no problem helps relieve any potential sense of debt or guilt the person receiving the gesture might otherwise take on.

Most of the time, doing the right thing is indeed no problem. In fact, it might be the solution to a lot of the daily problems we grapple with.

This article originally appeared on 08.15.18.

Any time conversations about wealth and poverty come up, people inevitably start talking about boots.

The standard phrase that comes up is “pull yourself up by your bootstraps,” which is usually shorthand for “work harder and don’t ask for or expect help.” (The fact that the phrase was originally used sarcastically because pulling oneself up by one’s bootstraps is literally, physically impossible is rarely acknowledged, but c’est la vie.) The idea that people who build wealth do so because they individually work harder than poor people is baked into the American consciousness and wrapped up in the ideal of the American dream.

A different take on boots and building wealth, however, paints a more accurate picture of what it takes to get out of poverty.

Author Terry Pratchett is no longer with us, but his writing lives on and is occasionally shared on his official social media accounts. Recently, his Twitter page shared the “Sam Vimes ‘Boots’ Theory of Socioeconomic Unfairness” from Pratchett’s 1993 book “Men At Arms.” This boots theory explains that one reason the rich are able to get richer is because they are able to spend less money.

If that sounds confusing, read on:

u2026 He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of okay for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollarsu2026n2/5

— Terry Pratchett (@Terry Pratchett)
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Pratchett wrote:

“The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that’d still be keeping his feet dry in ten years’ time, while the poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.”

In other words, people who have the money to spend a little more upfront often end up spending less in the long run. A $50 pair of boots that last five years essentially cost you $10 a year. But if you can only afford $10 upfront for a pair of boots that last six months, that’s what you buy—and you end up paying twice as much over a five-year period.

There are so many areas in which this principle applies when you’re poor. Buying in bulk saves you money over the long run, but you have to be able to afford the bulk cost up front. A reliable car that doesn’t require regular repairs will cost more than a beater, but if the beater is all you can afford, that’s what you’re stuck with. You’ll likely spend the same or more over time than if you’d bought a newer/higher quality car, but without the capital (or the credit rating) to begin with, you don’t have much choice.

People who can afford larger down payments pay lower interest rates, saving them money both immediately and in the long run. People who can afford to buy more can spend more with credit cards, pay off the balances, build up good credit and qualify for lower interest rate loans.

There are lots of good financial decisions and strategies one can utilize if one has the ability to build up some cash. But if you are living paycheck to paycheck, you can’t.

Climbing the financial ladder requires getting to the bottom rung first. Those who started off anywhere on the ladder can make all kinds of pronouncements about how to climb it—good, sound advice that really does work if you’re already on the ladder. But for people living in poverty, the bottom rung is just out of reach, and the walls you have to climb to get to it are slippery. It’s expensive to be poor.

When people talk about how hard it is to climb out of poverty, this is a big part of what they mean. Ladder-climbing advice is useless if you can’t actually get to the ladder. And yet, far too many people decry offering people assistance that might help them reach the ladder so they can start taking advantage of all that great financial advice. Why? Perhaps because they were born somewhere on the ladder—even if it was the bottom rung—and aren’t aware that there are people for whom the ladder is out of reach. Or perhaps they’re unaware of how expensive it is to be poor and how the costs of poverty keep people stuck in the pit. Hopefully, this theory will help more people understand and sympathize with the reality of being poor.

Money makes money, but having money also saves you money. The more money you have, the more wealth you’re able to build not only because you have extra money to save, but also because you buy higher quality things that last, therefore spending less in the long run. (There’s also the reality that the uber-wealthy will pay $5,000 for shoes they’ll only wear a few times, but that’s a whole other kind of boots story.)

Thanks, Terry Pratchett, for the simple explanation.

This story originally appeared on 01.28.22

Earlier today, Billie Eilish officially announced her new album, Hit Me Hard And Soft, will be out next month on May 17. In her Instagram reveal post, Eilish said she would not be releasing any singles, as she wants fans to hear it in full for the first time that day. However, not all of her rollout today seemingly went to plan, especially after the tracklist leak.

She caught the internet’s attention after calling out Rolling Stone on her apparent now-deleted Instagram stories. “F*ck Rolling Stone,” she wrote in one. “F*ck you guys @RollingStone,” Eilish allegedly added in another, which included a clown emoji. The publication has since updated the article, but it made the rounds on Reddit shortly after.

Despite the hiccup, Eilish still raised anticipation through various promotional stunts, like making headlines by adding everyone to her close friends story. Her album announcement post finds her underwater, which seems to play a role in the themes of the upcoming record. Once again, she co-wrote it alongside her brother, Finneas.

“Finneas and I truly could not be more proud of this album and we absolutely can’t wait for you to hear it,” Eilish captioned. “Love you love you love you.”

Check out Billie Eilish’s rumored posts about Rolling Stone below.

Hit Me Hard And Soft is out 5/17 via Darkroom/Interscope Records. Find more information here.

John Mulaney‘s most recent Netflix special Baby J hit the streamer last year. Now that he’s moved on from baby to toddler, he is ready for a brand new batch of comedy specials, this time live from Los Angeles, famously the least funny place on Earth.

Mulaney’s latest endeavor will be John Mulaney Presents: Everybody’s In LA, a new Netflix event which will consist of six installments featuring the Oh, Hello comedian as he “explores the city of Los Angeles during a week when every funny person is in it.” The term “funny” is subjective, but there will probably be some chuckles! Netflix teases that the special will be “comically unconventional” which is common in the state of California.

In a new ad for the special, they heavily imply (but do not confirm) that comedy legends like Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, and David Letterman will appear in the special. It also features Mulaney doing his best John Hughes cosplay:

The series debuts live on May 3 from the annual Netflix is a Joke Fest, with additional episodes streaming May 6-10 at 10 p.m. EST on Netflix.

This is just Netflix’s latest venture into live streaming as the company has been experimenting with live televised events, like the recent SAG awards and other stand-up specials. All of this is just a trial run for the highly anticipated Jake Paul vs. Mike Tyson event that will stream this July. Everyone’s been waiting for that one, right?

(Via Deadline)

The Bruce Springsteen biopic just took a major step towards becoming a reality. Deliver Me From Nowhere has been acquired by 20th Century Studios, and yes, Jeremy Allen White is in talks to play The Boss in the film that will center around the making of his legendary 1982 album Nebraska.

Hostiles and Crazy Horse director Scott Cooper will write and direct the film, which is based on the book Deliver Me from Nowhere: The Making of Bruce Springsteen’s Nebraska by Warren Zane.

“It is a once-in-a-lifetime honor to be collaborating with Bruce Springsteen, an inspiring and incomparable artist who represents so much to so many,” 20th Century Studios president David Greenbaum told Variety in a statement. “The deep authenticity of his story is in great hands with my friend Scott Cooper whom I am thrilled to be collaborating with once again.”

Via Variety:

Nebraska, the follow-up to Springsteen’s hugely successful album The River, was widely expected to be a rock album with the E Street Band. Instead, it was a stark solo album made on a 4-track recorder. The book and the film tell the story of Springsteen’s artistic journey in the creation of the record, which is regarded as a watershed in his musical odyssey.

Springsteen and his longtime manager Jon Landau will be involved in Deliver Me From Nowhere, which is slated to start production this fall.

(Via Variety)

Missy Elliott is returning to the road and leaving the Earth with her new tour, Out Of This World — The Missy Elliott Experience. The tour begins on July 4 in Vancouver, BC, in Canada, and features openers Busta Rhymes, Ciara, and Timbaland. It’ll be Missy’s first headlining tour in the US in nearly 20 years. The groundbreaking Virginia rap pioneer was recently inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame, and soon, fans across the United States can see why in person.

When Do Missy Elliott’s Out Of This World Tour Tickets Go On Sale?

A presale for Verizon subscribers begins Tuesday, April 9, with additional presales throughout the week. The general sale starts on Friday, April 12, at 10 am local time. You can get more information at missy-elliott.com. See below for the full tour dates.

7/4 — Vancouver, BC @ Rogers Arena
7/6 — Seattle, WA @ Climate Pledge Arena
7/9 — Oakland, CA @ Oakland Arena
7/11 — Los Angeles, CA @ Crypto.com Arena
7/13 — Las Vegas, NV @ T-Mobile Arena
7/16 — Denver, CO @ Ball Arena
7/18 — Austin, TX @ Moody Center
7/20 — Houston, TX @ Toyota Center
7/21 — Fort Worth, TX @ Dickies Arena
7/24 — Tampa, FL @ Amalie Arena
7/25 — Sunrise, FL @ Amerant Bank Arena
7/27 — Atlanta, GA @ State Farm Arena
8/1 — Baltimore, MD @ CFG Bank Arena
8/2 — Hampton, VA @ Hampton Coliseum
8/3 — Belmont Park, NY @ UBS Arena
8/5 — Philadelphia, PA @ Wells Fargo Center
8/8 — Washington, DC @ Capital One Arena
8/9 — Newark, NJ @ Prudential Center
8/10 — Boston, MA @ TD Garden
8/12 — Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center
8/15 — Detroit, MI @ Little Caesars Arena
8/17 — Montreal, QC @ Bell Centre
8/19 — Toronto, ON @ Scotiabank Arena
8/22 — Rosemont, IL @ Allstate Arena

Missy Elliott is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

With Coachella just around the corner, as the California festival starts later this week, American Express will be treating its cardholders to some special surprises while they’re there. Those with a card can bring up to three guests into the Amex Experience, which has four different immersive rooms. One of the spaces is themed to Reneé Rapp‘s album, Snow Angel, as she’s performing at the fest. The rest include a “retro snack bar,” a “bustling night market,” and a calming “cave-like room,” according to a release.

The perks don’t end there, though. Cardholders will be able to access exclusive merch at Coachella through a new merch-to-go window. This year, there will be mystery boxes of merch from Rapp and Tyler The Creator, which could include anything from hats to larger items like sweatshirts. Tyler The Creator’s merch can also be found at the Coachella Artist Merch Tent or the Golf Wang pop-up one.

Last, but certainly not least, American Express is partnering with In Your Dreams to provide festival attendees with complimentary glam services, whether you’re looking for hair help or some cool makeup.

Some of these same experiences, including the non-alcoholic bar, will also be available for those heading to Stagecoach instead of Coachella. They just will have a different spin on it. More information about Coachella 2024 can be found here.

When we think about gifted conversationalists, we’re more likely to think of great talkers—those who wow us with their insights, wit, and charm. However, communication experts believe that if you want to make a great impression on someone, knowing how to listen goes a long way.

Those of us who love being verbose may think the world loves us because of how well we can talk. But the person sitting in front of you has a lot to say, and nothing makes them feel better during a conversation than your undivided attention.

As the old saying goes, we never quite remember everything someone has said to us, but we’ll never forget how they made us feel. When you actively listen to your conversation partner, they feel that you value them and are receptive to their needs. It also eases any feelings of conflict or resentment.

After a good conversation, the person you spoke with should think, “Wow, that person really gets me,” instead of, “It was like I didn’t even exist.”

A study from 2016 on sales calls did an excellent job of quantifying the amount we should speak versus listen during a conversation. A marketing director at Gong.io analyzed 25,537 sales calls using artificial intelligence and found that the interactions where the salesperson talked 43% of the time and listened 57% of the time had the highest sales yield.

This finding has come to be known as the 43:57 rule.

Even though the study was conducted on business calls, the reason that it works should apply to social conversations as well. Paying more attention helps a salesperson identify the client’s needs and makes them feel comfortable spending money because they know it’s with someone who understands their interests.

It’s the same as a social situation where the person you speak to wants to know they are valued and you respect what they say.

This is excellent advice, but sometimes it’s hard to listen when you’re in a fun conversation and have a lot to say. Kate Murphy, author of “You’re Not Listening,” says it’s all about staying calm.

“Deep breaths are always good. They’re always good. Because it…calms down that fear response. It helps you get more centered,” Murphy told WBUR. “But also to develop your curiosity. Like I said, make it more important to be curious than to be right. And to go into every conversation with that mindset of how could I be wrong? Instead of, let me prove how I’m right.”

“That’s how you develop creative ideas. It’s how you cooperate. It’s how you find middle ground, or at least a peaceable existence,” Murphy added.

The idea that to be a great conversationalist one should master the art of listening is a bit counterintuitive. But, if you feel that you have a lot to say in conversations and can be interesting to listen to, imagine how great that’ll make others feel when you show that you enjoy listening to them as well. It’s a virtuous cycle where everyone wins.

This article originally appeared on 3.7.23

There’s one thing you can say about little kids that’s pretty consistent no matter who the kid is, and it’s that they’re brutally honest. Whether you have something stuck in your teeth or you’ve gained weight, a small child will inform you – loudly, and usually in front of others. But one preschooler’s moment of honesty is going viral for how relatable it is.

An exhausted and cranky 4-year-old named Jude has had enough. The little boy had just gotten home from school when he must’ve been asked something before the camera started rolling because his response was a #same moment.

“Listen. No, do you hear me? I’m cranky, I’m tired, I worked hard at school,” Jude says to his dad.

Jude’s mom, Amber Tinker uploaded the video to TikTok where it went viral with over 14 million views and over 1.5 million likes. The tiny grumpy human was clearly not interested in whatever shenanigans his dad was up to and he let him know it.

Jude’s dad, Justin Tinker was attempting to tease the boy about messing with him later but Jude was having none of it. The preschooler quickly repeated that he was cranky and tired after working hard at school. He mumbles something as he walks towards a barn when his dad stops him.

“I’ve already got everything fed and watered. I already got the eggs, I did your job cause I knew you was tired,” Justin calls out.

Though his dad did his chores for him, Jude still didn’t feel like he got his point across because later in the video he repeats how cranky and tired he is. Both of his parents explained they also worked hard today and were tired but it was obvious that Jude out tired them all. In the end he declared he was getting a bath tonight. Maybe his mom will bring him a cold Capri Sun and light some candles while he soaks in a bubble bath. Preschool must be rough these days.

Watch the whole video below:

@judemywildchild

This boy has had enough! #HeyJude #Cranky #Tired #kidsoftiktok #Funny #Viral

This article originally appeared on 10.18.23

In recent years, baby boomers have often been the target of criticism from younger generations. The most common accusations are that boomers are selfish and don’t care about leaving ample resources (whether financial or environmental) to subsequent generations.

They also come under fire for not being able to acknowledge that it was easier for people of their generation to come of age when things were more affordable and life was a lot less competitive.

However, we should also understand that many of today’s problems are not the boomers’ doing, especially when it comes to the issues that stem from entitled children and technology run amok. In hindsight, there’s something to be said about the importance that boomers placed on self-reliance, letting kids be kids and having a healthy skepticism towards technology.

In the end, each generation contributes to the tapestry of society in its unique way, whether good or bad, even baby boomers. This became evident after a Reddit user named Youssef4573 asked the AskReddit subforum: ‘What is something you can say ‘I’m with the boomers on this one’ about?” Over 4,700 people responded to the prompt, and the most prevalent problems mentioned by the younger generations were overreliance on technology, the modern world’s lack of human touch and how Gen Xers and millennials have raised their children.

Here are 17 things that younger people are “with the boomers” about.

1. Public filming

“Just because I’m in public doesn’t mean I want to be filmed. Yeah, I know legally you can, but common courtesy people.” — Jayne_of_Canton

2. Customer service

“I want to talk to a person in customer service, not a machine.” — lumpy_space_queenie

“And also a person that actually works at the company I bought the product from, not a teenager at an outsourced call center with a script to follow and who answers calls for 15 different companies on the same day.” — Loive.

3. Turn up the dialog

“For the love of all that is holy, can we fix the audio in movies so that the music and sound FX aren’t drowning out the dialogue?” — Caloso

“And the action sequences don’t burst your eardrums or the dialogue is whispers.” — Whynottry-again

4. Bring back buttons

“No, I don’t need everything in my car to be electronic. Some stuff needs buttons.” — LamborghiniHEAT

“This was the big thing for me in my last car – trying to adjust volume or change songs while driving is way more dangerous when it’s all touch screen. Thankfully my current car has physical knobs for everything.” — GeekdomCentral

5. App overload

“Every store/service does not need an app.” — BigDigger324

“I was standing at a car rental counter at an airport (boomer here) to rent a car. My daughter’s car broke down on the way to pick me up. While standing at the counter, with a customer service rep right there and not busy, I had to log in to their site, create an account, and reserve a car. It seemed ridiculous and it took a long time, filling in my license information and all that. This was last September.” — Cleanslate

6. Bring back DIY

“Learning DIY skills is crucial. I had basically zero DIY skills when I bought my house because I had lived in apartments for so long and I’ve had to learn a lot. YouTube tutorials are absolutely clutch.” — JingleJongleBongle

7. Turn off the speakerphone

“I hated this when I worked at Walmart. So many of my coworkers would talk on speaker or watch TikTok at full volume. It’s just trashy imo, nobody wants to hear your media.” — WhiteGuy1x

“I work at an emergency medical office and holy sh*t the amount of people that sit in a quiet, peaceful lobby and just have the LOUDEST conversations on their phone…. Speaker or otherwise. Not to mention the people that still watch sh*t without headphones. Like do you not see the plethora of other people around you that you’re disturbing?” — Cinderpuppins

8. Ban QR code menus

“I think menus should be tangible.” — Limp-Management9684

“QR codes kill the vibe. We’re all on our phones constantly throughout the day and then when you go to spend some quality time with someone, it’s another excuse to whip out the phone and stare at it. There’s an intimacy to a physical menu. You’re looking at what the other person is reading, you’re each pointing to parts of the menu. You’re noticing the lighting of the restaurant. QR codes feel chintzy and kill the ambiance completely.” — VapeDerp420

9. Stop subscriptions

“When I was your age, you only had to pay for a video game once to own it.” — CattonCruthby

10. Free the children

“A kid in 2024 should have the same freedom to exist unsupervised and move about their community independently as a boomer did growing up.” — PixelatedFish

“The world is safer than it’s ever been and people are more scared than ever. I blame true crime and local news.” ⲻ Unhappyhippo142

11. Kids need to touch grass

“Kids shouldn’t be on phones or iPads all the time. It makes them weird.” — Ubstantial_Part_952

“The same could be said about most adults.” — DrunkOctopus

12. Stop being so sensitive

“People in our generation are far, far too sensitive. Don’t get it twisted; empathy is, by and large, a good thing and it takes some serious doing for me to say it’s gone too far. But collectively, we’ve become people willing to throw every last bit of energy fighting against every slight and making sure our pet cause gets top billing to the point of fighting amongst each other even if we’re in almost complete agreement otherwise. Emotional energy – like any other kind of energy – is very much a finite resource. Whereas boomers could at least generally agree to disagree and get on with things (obvious cross-wielding exceptions doth apply). Culturally, we’ve lost sight of the adage of ‘winning the battle, losing the war.'” — almighty_smiley

13. Stop delivery

“Food delivery services are a complete ripoff; if you use them regularly, you’re terrible with money. Get off my lawn.” — VapeDerp420

14. Parking meters

“So rather than throwing a few coins in your meter, you have to now get your license plate #, get your meter number, go to the meter station, stand in line with everyone waiting to pay their meter, then you’re set. It’s an unnecessary amount of extra steps. I don’t carry cash much anymore, but I can hide a small amount of coin in my car to quickly pay a meter.” — Luke5119

15. Kids should know their place

“Not letting your children rule the roost. When did it become acceptable to let your kids back-talk to you, slap you, climb all over shi*t in public places? As we’ve raised ours, I’ve witnessed so many parents around us just let these behaviors slide. It’s kind of sad when I’m the one saying things like, “Did I just hear you just say that to your mom?!?!?!?! That is not ok. You go and apologize right now!!”. Then I get this stunned “deer in headlights” look back that tells me they aren’t used to someone calling them out on their behavior.” — Cobblestone-Villain

16. Pride in ownership

“Seems that a lot of boomers have pride of ownership and enjoy maintaining what they have.” — Awkward_Bench123

17. Don’t follow leaders

“My dad (a solid boomer) has been saying that ALL politicians are crooks since he became disenchanted with politics around the Nixon era. He was starry-eyed before that, trying to make social change, yada yada. He still votes, but holds his nose. Can’t say I disagree with him.” — Thin_white_duchess

This article originally appeared on 1.23.24