Despite the fact that they only speak in purrs, meows, and other cat sounds, cats do communicate with humans. They have their “I’m so cute, don’t you want to feed me?” face. There’s their “I will not be ignored” shenanigans when they want your attention and their side-eyes of disdain when they don’t. They sleep all day in the most random places only to wake you with their thunderpaws romping through the house at 2:00 a.m., and they flat-out refuse to acknowledge your existence in public.
Cats may not speak English—or any human language, for that matter—but what if they could? British comedian Jake Lambert shared a viral cat-to-English translation video imagining what they’d say, and it’s hilariously spot on.
“Wake up! I’m hungry and bored and want attention! Hellooooo,” he calls from outside the bedroom door.
“I am shattered,” he says next, yawning. “I was up all night trying to wake you up! Anyway, I’m gonna go sleep in a really impractical spot for about five hours, see you in a bit.”
Every scenario is one cat owners have experienced at least once, but most likely live with on a semi-daily basis.
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People found Lambert’s interpretations to be 100% accurate.
“My cats are demanding royalties for the script, 😂” wrote one commenter.
“Hahahaha the zero second warning between happy and absolutely raging,” wrote another.
“Cats are such great teachers,” quipped another. “Right now I’m taking a PhD in getting rejected and respecting boundaries (just not my own) 😆🐈⬛.”
“Have watched this about 5 times since yesterday and laugh out loud every time especially the ear scratch bliss to hiss 😹 this is why cats scare me 😂,” offered another.
Other people offered their own additions to the cat conversation:
“You missed ‘I really like this food you should buy it again’ closely followed by ‘I hate this food, why would you ever consider buying it?’”
“Plus dramatically gagging over the same thing he chowed down on the previous day. 😂”
“This would be my cat: *enters living room meowing and a waft of crap follows* ‘Just did a dump in my litter tray, can you clean it asap so I can do another in 5 minutes?'”
“Also: ‘please change my menu at least 3 times in each feeding as I’m not sure what I’ll fancy.'”
“All correct, together with the standing by the front (or back) door undecided on whether he wants to be inside or outside of the house. 🤦”
Cat comedy never gets old, and it’s delightful to know that house cats are the same quirky, mysterious, goofy companions no matter what country their owners live in.
You can follow Jake Lambert on Instagram.