Month: July 2024

Summer 2024 is moving way too fast. Just last month we launched a big ranking of all the best chocolate milkshakes in fast food and opened that article with the line “It’s starting to feel like summer,” and now here we are just a little over a month from that date, and it feels like the season is just breezing by.

In less than a month from now, people will already be heading back to school, and although it’ll technically still be summer until the end of September, let’s face it, once college classes start up again and the weather cools down a few degrees, the season is, for all intents and purposes, over. So before summer comes to a close, treat yourself right by grabbing the coldest, thickest, and tastiest milkshakes your money can buy.

Last month’s ranking was great for fans of chocolate milkshakes, but chocolate isn’t everyone’s favorite flavor, so for this ranking, anything goes! We’re shouting out and tasting the best milkshakes from our favorite fast food restaurants, and ranking them from good to great.

Yes, you might find one or two chocolate milkshakes in this ranking (some are too great to deny), but mostly we’re going to be focusing on the more adventurous flavors. Let’s sip!

16. McDonald’s — McCafe Chocolate Shake

Thickness: 2/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

McDonald’s shake game is weak. The chain just doesn’t have a single decent milkshake, the only dessert you should ever be picking up from McDonald’s is a soft serve cone or a McFlurry.

If you insist on drinking a milkshake, the only choice worth picking up is the Chocolate Shake, but be warned, you’re going to be disappointed.

This milkshake consists of some chocolate syrup mixed into McDonald’s vanilla soft-serve base. It’s loose, watery, and not nearly as chocolatey as we need it to be to be considered good. Luckily for all of us, this is the one true dud on this list.

The Bottom Line:

Skip it entirely. Get a McFlurry.

Find your nearest McDonald’s here.

15. Wendy’s — Triple Berry Frosty

Thickness: 5/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Wendy’s latest Frosty flavor is its best. The Triple Berry Frosty combines fruity notes for a refreshing dark berry flavor that is addicting as f*ck. According to Wendy’s, the flavor combination is a mix of strawberries, blackberries, and raspberries, but I’m tasting the woody floral notes more typical of blueberries and blackberries than anything else.

It’s not quite as versatile as the chocolate Frosty, and doesn’t serve as a better fry dip than vanilla but I think the flavor is much more interesting than anything Wendy’s has put on the dessert menu in awhile.

The Bottom Line:

The Triple Berry Frosty isn’t for everyone, but if you like berry-forward flavors and the refreshing quality of a strawberry milkshake, this is by far Wendy’s most interesting dessert offering.

Find your nearest Wendy’s here.

14. Dave’s Hot Chicken — Vanilla Shake

Thickness: 3/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

I’m fully aware that Dave’s Hot Chicken has milkshakes with mix-ins, including Cinnamon Toast Crunch, M&Ms, and crushed Oreos but I think Dave’s shakes are at their best when they are as simple as possible. Dave’s Hot Chicken is all about, well, hot chicken, you need something to offset all that heat and what better way to do that than with a nice cold, simple, vanilla milkshake?

A lot of fast food milkshakes out there use vanilla as a base and its virtually flavorless, but Dave’s actually tastes like real vanilla. It has this delicate floral quality about it that I find absolutely addicting.

While I love the flavor though, I have to knock points off this one for being a bit watery and not thick and luxurious like a milkshake should be.

The Bottom Line:

A great-tasting vanilla milkshake, but the consistency leaves a lot to be desired.

Find your nearest Dave’s Hot Chicken here.

13. Burger King — Chocolate Oreo Milkshake

Thickness: 3/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

I’m giving Burger King points for being one of the few fast food chains that has a chocolate Oreo milkshake rather than the typical vanilla base. Because chocolate doesn’t taste anything like Oreo creme, this milkshake tastes less like a giant drinkable version of an oreo and more like a rich brownie-flavored shake with bits of dark chocolate cookie providing texture.

I kind of love that! The only weak point on this shake is the consistency. If it was just a bit thicker, we’d be willing to bump this up a few spots. But in a milkshake ranking, thickness is everything.

The Bottom Line:

Wonderfully chocolatey with a nice cookie-filled texture. One of BK’s best menu items but compared to the competition, this milkshake is merely good, not great.

Find your nearest Burger King here.

12. Carl’s Jr. — Hand-Scooped Vanilla Ice Cream Shake

Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Carl’s Jr. milkshake has the same vibe as Dave’s Hot Chicken, it tastes like vanilla, not like sweet milk. It’s floral with gentle notes of honey! But unlike with Dave’s, the thickness actually delivers here.

That’s because Carl’s Jr.’s milkshakes are made with scoops of ice cream rather than a soft serve base. So think of this as a drinkable scoop of ice cream. Actually, don’t do that, because that sounds incredibly unappetizing.

Good as this milkshake is, at the end of the day it’s just a vanilla milkshake. If it had some interesting mix-ins to add texture that might be enough to rank this higher, but as it stands right now, it’s very good, but not great.

The Bottom Line:

Thick and creamy, with a strong vanilla flavor. But it’s a little boring compared to what we’ve ranked higher.

Find your nearest Carl’s Jr. here.

11. Arby’s — Jamocha Shake

Thickness: 3/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Arby’s doesn’t get enough credit for having good milkshakes. Contrary to popular belief, Arby’s isn’t all about the meats. They’ve got the milks too! Okay, sorry, that sounds disgusting. What we’re trying to say is that the Jamocha Shake is worth the pick-up, especially if you like coffee-flavored sweet treats.

What you get here is a rich and decadent coffee flavor hovering over deep chocolatey notes. Think of a Mocha Frappuccino, but with a bigger focus on the chocolate rather than the coffee. That’s not to say the coffee is weak, you still get that slightly bitter vibe and a hit of caffeine from this drink, but the dominating flavor is chocolate.

The Bottom Line:

There are few pleasures greater than hitting up an Arby’s drive-thru in the morning for a coffee-infused milkshake. It’s the sort of thing that makes summer the season.

Find your nearest Arby’s here.

10. Del Taco — Strawberry Shake

Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

I’ll never understand the hate strawberry milkshakes get. As one of the classic big three of milkshake flavors, this is the only one that has a lot of haters. If you hate strawberry milkshakes, I have to ask — what’s wrong with you?

This milkshake is fruity and refreshing with a luxurious consistency. Del Taco’s strawberry shake has chunks of real frozen strawberry that come through the straw and offer the occasional burst of tangy flavor. It’s not just a great strawberry milkshake, it’s the best strawberry milkshake in all of fast food.

The Bottom Line:

Wonderfully refreshing, fast food’s greatest strawberry milkshake.

Find your nearest Del Taco here.

9. Jack in the Box — Oreo Milkshake

Thickness: 2/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Jack in the Box was once the gold standard of Oreo Milkshakes. While I think that in 2024 there are a few fast food brands that do the flavor a bit better, this is still very, very good.

JiB’s Oreo Milkshake is luxuriously thick with a vanilla cream-forward flavor that ends with a strong chocolate finish. Somehow JiB is able to keep the cookies that are mixed in crunchy despite being inundated in a vanilla base. And JiB goes heavy on the mix-ins, giving you a good amount of cookie flavor in every sip.

No complaints here, this is a near-perfect milkshake, but not one of our absolute favorites.

The Bottom Line:

Near-perfect, but there are a couple of Oreo-based shakes we like better.

Find your nearest Jack in the Box here.

8. Sonic — Strawberry Cheesecake Master Shake

Thickness: 5/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Sonic’s Strawberry Cheesecake earns its ridiculous “Master Shake” name, this thing delivers! Drinking this milkshake will take you on a journey that begins creamy, shifts into a sharp wince-inducing tang, morphs into sweet cherry and fruity strawberry flavors, and finishes with a nutty cinnamon graham cracker finish. And that’s all in one sip!

But be warned, this milkshake isn’t for everyone. If you don’t like the flavor of cheesecake, this won’t sell you on it no matter how many grams of sugar and mix-ins are tossed in this thing.

The Bottom Line:

A rich, creamy, and tangy delight for people who love cheesecake. If you don’t like cheesecake though, this probably won’t change your mind.

Find your nearest Sonic here.

7. In-N-Out — Neapolitan Shake

Thickness: 5/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

In-N-Out’s best milkshake flavor comes right off its Secret Menu. The Neapolitan Shake — as its name would imply — is a combination of In-N-Out’s chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry flavors, all mixed into one milkshake.

It provides a medley of flavors that begins with an intense burst of strawberry before settling into rich chocolate territory. It’s thick, creamy, rich, and cold enough to give you an instant brain freeze. If you’re worried about ordering something from an unlisted secret menu, don’t, the In-N-Out employees know exactly what you’re talking about if you simply ask for a “Neapolitan Shake.”

And if you’re feeling brave, go ahead and ask for a Rootbeer Float!

The Bottom Line:

One of In-N-Out’s most delicious secrets.

Find your nearest In-N-Out here.

6. Steak n Shake — Oreo Mint Milkshake

Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

In the entry for the Jack in the Box Oreo Shake, I wrote that there were a couple of brands out there that do it better, this is one of the shakes I was talking about. Steak and Shake’s Oreo Mint Milkshake is leagues better than what you can get at JiB and offers a complex spin on what is, in 2024, an overdone flavor.

One sip introduces your tastebuds to a cool mint flavor that pairs perfectly with the semi-bitter cocoa flavor of Oreo cookies before closing with a sweet vanilla finish. But the flavor is one thing, where this milkshake really shines is the thickness. It’s luxurious, and a struggle to pull up through the straw, which is admittedly annoying, but ultimately the sign of a good milkshake.

The Bottom Line:

Imagine an Andes Mint had a baby with an Oreo and it resulted in this amazing milkshake.

Find your nearest Steak n Shake here.

5. Dairy Queen — Nutter Butter

Thickness: 5/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

There is a reason we re-rank our food lists every year. Fast food menus are always in flux, sometimes flavors get retired or new options emerge. If we want to offer the most relevant list, we must re-taste what’s out there and re-rank everything. So let’s take a moment to mourn the end of Dairy Queen’s Banana Melt, which used to be one of our all-time favorites.

Alright, moments over, is there anything else as good as the Banana Melt?

No, not quite, but the Nutter Butter comes incredibly close to being just as good. The milkshake has real Nutter Butter’s blended into its vanilla base, offering a sweet peanut butter forward flavor with the occasional cookie crumble.

The Bottom Line:

DQ’s best milkshake flavor, but we still miss the Banana Melt.

Find your nearest Dairy Queen here.

4. Johnny Rocket’s — Chocolate Chip Cookie Shake

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Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

I’m a sucker for a chocolate chip cookie, I think it’s the greatest cookie flavor ever, so a milkshake that attempts to capture that magic? I’m going to love it.

Johnny Rocket’s Chocolate Chip cookie is smooth and buttery with notes of toasty brown sugar and a semi-sweet chocolate finish on the aftertaste. If you love chocolate chip cookies, you’re going to love this.

The Bottom Line:

A thick and delicious milkshake that combines buttery brown sugar flavors and semi-sweet chocolate. It does the chocolate chip cookie proud!

Find your nearest Johnny Rockets here.

3. Shake Shack — Chocolate Salted Caramel Shake

Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

We named Shake Shack’s Malted Chocolate Shake the best chocolate milkshake in all of fast food, but we wanted to take some time on this ranking to shout out the almost-as-delicious limited-time-only Chocolate Salted Caramel Shake.

This shake features a sweet chocolate frozen custard mixed with caramel and chocolate brownie batter, topped with whipped cream and caramel sauce. It offers a mix of rich chocolatey flavors and toasty brown sugar notes with a nutty finish and a touch of salt. It’s delicious and even better if you get it malted.

What is keeping us from ranking it any higher though is the consistency. It’s not quite as thick and luxurious as our top two picks.

The Bottom Line:

One of Shake Shack’s best limited-time-only shake flavors in some time. A mix of decadent chocolate notes and salty caramel.

Find your nearest Shake Shack here.

2. Five Guys — Milkshake with Oreos and Oreo Creme

Thickness: 5/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Five Guys makes the best Oreo shake in all of fast food. They achieve this by not just throwing Oreo cookie crumbles into the mix, but the creme as well, perfectly matching the flavor of an actual Oreo.

But there is a twist here. Drinking this milkshake is a bit like eating an Oreo inside out, it starts creamy and sweet and finishes with that strong slightly bitter cocoa flavor that is so characteristic of the cookie.

Best of all it’s thick as hell, so thick that we wouldn’t blame you for ditching the straw and diving in with a spoon.

Remember though, Five Guys has a fully customizable menu so don’t stop at Oreos, mix in some bananas, peanut butter, or even bacon if you want a salty and smokey finish.

The Bottom Line:

If you love Oreo milkshakes, it doesn’t get better than Five Guys.

Find your nearest Five Guys here.

1. Chick-fil-A — Peach Milkshake

Thickness: 4/5

Tasting Notes & Thoughts

Last year, we named Chick-fil-A’s seasonal Peach Milkshake the second-best milkshake in all of fast food. Today, we’re happy to say it’s taken the number one spot.

This milkshake is unlike anything else in fast food. It’s delicate, floral, and sweet, with a refreshing gently tangy finish. It’s made with real peach puree blended with Chick-fil-A’s creamy Icedream soft serve and topped with ribbons of whipped cream. It’s simultaneously thick and airy, passing easily through the straw but not turning to a watery mess before you can finish it due to outside elements.

The only thing this milkshake has working against is that it’s seasonal, appearing on menus only during the summertime. That means if you want to try it get out there and order it before the season ends.

The Bottom Line:

The best tasting and most unique milkshake in all of fast food.

Find your nearest Chick-fil-A here.

The USA men’s basketball team’s quest for gold got underway on Sunday afternoon in Lille, France, where they faced medal threat Serbia in their Olympics opener and, after a rocky first few minutes, turned on the jets and absolutely dominated Serbia, 110-84. It was a statement performance, with LeBron James continuing to be the American’s best player this summer and Kevin Durant making a triumphant debut after missing the exhibition slate with a calf strain, scoring 21 points on a perfect 8-for-8 shooting in the first half.

Just about everyone that saw the court for Team USA looked good, as Jrue Holiday, Devin Booker, Stephen Curry, and Anthony Edwards all also reached double figures, while Anthony Davis, Derrick White, and Bam Adebayo were excellent on defense off the bench. The only question mark among those that played continues to be Joel Embiid at starting center, where he just has not found a comfort level with the preferred fast tempo of Team USA and being a secondary option on offense. Other than that, it was a standout performance from Team USA and asserted themselves firmly as the favorites in case there was any doubt after a couple shaky wins to close out their showcase run.

There were two DNPs in the game for Team USA, though. Tyrese Haliburton unsurprisingly on the list after his minutes slowly faded away during the exhibition slate, and he seems to have embraced his role as hype man, as the USA squad has a greater need for defense from its guard spots than another scorer. The other DNP-CD was Jayson Tatum, who played in every exhibition game and started a couple, but found himself as the odd man out of the wing rotation with Kevin Durant’s return to action. That came as a surprise to many, as Tatum is fresh off his first championship and another All-NBA campaign in Boston.

However, as Steve Kerr said after the game, that was just how things shook out with the lineups they wanted to get to with KD back, but he did note he “felt like an idiot” not playing Tatum because he is one of the best in the world.

One of the greatest challenges in coaching Team USA is ego management, and Kerr clearly recognizes that tightrope here. As he notes, Tatum will play and get his opportunities later when there are matchups that are better suited for lineups with him in them. While Tatum and Celtics fans may have been upset about it, it’s hard to argue with the results from Team USA’s opener and any of the lineup choices Kerr has made — with the exception of Embiid starting, which is a whole different delicate situation that Tatum wouldn’t factor into.

It seems likely that Tatum will be back in action against South Sudan on Tuesday, but it’ll be fascinating to see who ends up the odd man out to make that happen, because someone else who played well in the opener will have to sacrifice minutes to get Tatum involved.

This month marks the 45th anniversary of Highway To Hell, the classic sixth album by Australian rock institution AC/DC. I mention this because I have written a column about my favorite AC/DC songs, and when you write a column about your favorite songs by a venerable classic-rock act it’s nice to have an anniversary to peg it on, preferably a year ending in zero or five.

But I’ll be honest: The real reason I wrote this column is that it’s the middle of summer. And I like to listen to AC/DC in the middle of summer. Unfortunately, my job requires that I listen to lots of music that is not AC/DC. Therefore, I sought a loophole that would allow me to listen to AC/DC for professional reasons. Hence, the thing you are currently looking at.

So, here we are. You have surely heard of AC/DC. But do you know anything about them? Do you know that you should care about whether you know anything about them?

It’s time to head down the highway to hell, my friends! Here are my 30 favorite AC/DC songs.

Pre-List Disclaimer: If You Want Blood (In The Form Of Music Criticism) You Got It

This performance was filmed on April 30, 1978 at The Apollo in Glasgow, and released six months later on the live album, If You Want Blood You Got It. The show took place one month before AC/DC’s fifth (and possibly best) studio LP, Powerage, was released in the United States. Sixteen months after this gig, they put out Highway To Hell, AC/DC’s first hit in America and their last record with original lead singer Bon Scott. Less than two years after the Glasgow show, Scott stumbled into a friend’s car after a night of heavy drinking — his blood alcohol level supposedly was at .208 — and passed out. He never woke up. Not long after that, AC/DC — deservedly if also inexplicably — became the most popular hard rock band in the history of humankind.

If the point of this column is to explain what makes AC/DC great, it would be more efficient to simply instruct readers to watch the video above exactly 25 times in a row. Describing what goes down in this five-minute-and-35-second clip would be like trying to articulate the feeling of eating the best damn plate of hot wings you have ever had in your life rather than simply rolling up your sleeves and chowing down. It turns a visceral and sensual experience into an academic exercise.

Nevertheless, I am a writer and I am dedicated to my imperfect medium of choice, so here goes: The guy in the school boy outfit is Angus Young, and he is extremely good at playing a Gibson SG while duckwalking on stage like — to quote noted music critic/Aerosmith guitarist Joe Perry — “flopping bacon.” The other guitarist is Malcolm Young, Angus’ brother, who stands stoically in the shadows while unleashing the universe’s most massive-sounding riffs. The rhythm section is composed of drummer Phil Rudd and bassist Cliff Williams, who are “doing nothing all that complicated” if you listen to music like a moron. And the singer is our Bon, who smiles at the microphone while unleashing the most charmingly malevolent squeal in rock history. He is, by all accounts, a nice chap in real life. But on stage, he is the opposite of a nice chap. He is heroic. He is villainous. He will kick the shit out of you. And then he will get you drunk. “Music is meant to be played as loudly as possible,” he once said, “really raw and punchy, and I’ll punch out anyone who doesn’t like it the way I do.” He was smiling when he said it. But he was dead serious.

Have you watched that video 25 times in a row yet? While you do that, I will continue to describe this plate of delicious wings.

30. “Big Balls” (1976)

Not to be confused with “She’s Got Balls,” from AC/DC’s debut, High Voltage. I actually considered putting “She’s Got Balls” in this slot, as I find it to be slightly superior on musical merits. But “Big Balls” gets the nod on philosophical grounds. If we are going to have a conversation about AC/DC, we must begin by contemplating enormous testicles. (Only as a metaphor — I am not trying to get arrested here.)

Listening to AC/DC prompts all sorts of questions. What is “good” art? What makes a song “smart”? Is being “good” or “smart” necessary? In their early years, AC/DC was routinely dismissed as lowest common denominator music for knuckle draggers. Critics dismissed their music as a series of hyper-macho double-entendres set to super-charged Chuck Berry riffs. But then perceptions shifted. In time, AC/DC was celebrated for making a series of hyper-macho double-entendres set to super-charged Chuck Berry riffs. Their music never changed, never evolved, never kept up with the times. If anything, they became even more retrograde as the decades passed. And yet their commercial power and critical esteem only grew.

Here’s another question pertinent to the AC/DC project: What is sexism? Because a lot of AC/DC songs seem, at least superficially, to be pretty sexist! “Let Me Put My Love Into You,” “Givin’ The Dog A Bone,” “Beating Around The Bush,” “Emission Control,” the decidedly non-immortal “Sink The Pink” — this is a band that, on paper, makes Smell The Glove look like Kid A. But not even grandmothers are offended by AC/DC in 2024. Granted, many of our contemporary grandmothers were in college when Back In Black was released. But nobody believes this is a band coming from a negative or toxic place, no matter how much they talk about the circumference of their oversized extremities.

There are two explanations for this. The first is what we’ll call “The Howard Stern/Charles Barkley Rule,” which is that people who routinely say rude or offensive things sometimes get a pass because they have a track record of also being funny about it. (As opposed to run-of-the-mill jerks who act like run-of-the-mill jerks for no reason and zero panache.) This applies to AC/DC — co-stars of 1997’s Private Parts — but it’s not the main or most important explanation. That explanation can be witnessed in “Big Balls” when Bon Scott points out that I have big balls and he has big balls and (yes) she has big balls and (most important) we have big balls.

AC/DC gets a pass because they are inclusive. “I always liked the underdog,” Angus explained to Vulture in 2020. “We performed, and continue to perform, for the little people. And I can say that because I’m 5”2.” No matter who you are or where you come from or even whether you have literal testes, AC/DC recognizes and honors your big balls. And that is why they own all the world’s arenas.

29. “The Jack” (1976)

Sorry, there is also a third explanation for AC/DC’s “get out of jail free” card for the crime of writing a song called “Sink The Pink” — the schoolboy outfit. For a band that otherwise eschews gimmicks and all other forms of theatricality, Angus’ iconic schoolboy outfit psychologically disarms the AC/DC listener. You simply can’t be mad at a grown man in short pants, even if the singer is relating a story about contracting gonorrhea while on tour.

28. “Touch Too Much” (1979)

There’s an innocence to AC/DC that puts their strutting cock-of-the-walk machismo in a non-threatening context. It’s the sort of posturing that many young men at some point attempt to emulate, usually as compensation for crippling insecurity they can’t bear to reveal to the rest of the male herd. It only becomes toxic if you take the exaggerated posturing seriously — “acting like a man” largely entails behaving like a big, dumb idiot, which is harmless if confined to harmless pursuits, like watching sports or playing in a rock band. (As opposed to posting in internet forums or politics.) Even Bon Scott, the ultimate bad boy womanizer and serial beatdown artist on stage, was secretly a devoted boyfriend who collected comic books.

Of course, AC/DC is also popular because their records happen to be perfectly recorded and produced. That was true when they worked with George Young (Angus and Malcolm’s big brother) and Harry Vanda on the early records. And it was definitely true when they teamed up with Robert John “Mutt” Lange, the perfectionist recluse who entered the AC/DC fold with Highway To Hell and stayed on for the next two records, Back In Black and For Those About To Rock (We Salute You). Lange’s contribution to AC/DC’s music was teasing out the sugar at the heart of their gnarly and snarly anthems. “Touch Too Much” is positively spartan compared with Lange’s later work with Def Leppard, Bryan Adams, and Shania Twain, but the backing vocals on the chorus are positively gooey by AC/DC standards.

27. “Are You Ready” (1990)

My first AC/DC album was The Razors Edge, which came out when I was in the seventh grade aka the exact right age to start caring about AC/DC. It was overseen by Bruce Fairbairn, the late Canadian producer who also revived Aerosmith’s career at this time with his work on Permanent Vacation, Pump, and Get A Grip. With Aerosmith, he brought outside songwriters and Alicia Silverstone into the band’s fold. But with AC/DC, the job was simpler — just get the Young brothers to write chant-worthy songs that appeal to neanderthals in football stadiums (American and/or international) deep into their cups. The defining hit from The Razors Edge, “Thunderstruck,” just might be the defining “football song for neanderthals” anthem. (We’ll talk more about that one later.) But “Are You Ready” fits the bill as well. Admittedly, “write a song that sounds like a Monday Night Football theme” might not be the most artistically invigorating prompt, but you can’t fault AC/DC for executing it perfectly.

26. “Rock ‘N’ Roll Train” (2008)

The first song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. Next to balls, rock ‘n’ roll is AC/DC’s most important muse. The first rule of writing is that you write what you know, and AC/DC knows the ins and outs of rock ‘n’ roll more completely than any band on the planet. In “Rock ‘N’ Roll Train,” the titular subject is paired with a runaway locomotive, a mode of transportation just as anachronistic as stadium rock was in 2008. But anachronisms have never been something to fear for AC/DC. Their power derives from reveling in anachronisms. “Rock ‘N’ Roll Train” is the first track on Black Ice, an album that AC/DC insisted on selling exclusively via CDs — absolutely no MP3 downloads — at Wal-Mart stores. It subsequently moved more units that year than albums by Taylor Swift, Metallica, and Beyoncé. Some runaway trains simply refused to be derailed.

25. “Ride On” (1976)

The schism between Bon Scott-era AC/DC and Brian Johnson-era AC/DC is eternal, though everybody who cares agrees on the proper assessments of both versions of the band. (I am deliberately leaving Axl Rose out of this conversation because addressing Axl would distract me from the task at hand and result in a column that is at least 50,000 words.) The Bon era is superior, and the Brian era is more popular (in part because the table was set by the Bon era). Every album of the Bon era is essential, whereas you only need Back In Black from the Brian era if you’re a casual listener. More devoted followers will also want For Those About To Rock and The Razors Edge, while only complete freaks will want all of them. (Related: I own every AC/DC album.)

There are various nuances that define Bon’s style vs. Brian’s style, but here’s the succinct and only slightly reductive summation: Bon Scott is Bon Scott, and Brian Johnson is a caricature of Bon Scott. I mean no disrespect. I like Brian Johnson. But he’s a cartoon version of a tough-guy singer, and Bon Scott is an actual tough-guy singer. Brian’s snarl is impressive and iconic, but it is also one-dimensional. He only has one mode (newsboy hat-wearing nymphomaniac), whereas Bon constantly revealed deeper shades to his persona.

For example: Brian Johnson could never produce a song like “Ride On.” This is Bon showing you his tender side. He’s in a lonely town. And it’s a lonely night. A woman is on his mind. He tells us he ain’t too young to worry and he ain’t too old to cry. Before the shocking image of a weeping Bon Scott can overtake us, he delivers his mission statement: “One of these days I’m gonna change my evil ways,” he says. “’Til then I’ll just keep riding on.”

Bon understood the principles of dynamics. In “Ride On,” the tenderness accentuates the toughness. You can’t stand shirtless on stage with an armadillo in your trousers without a big, fat heart beating underneath all that chest hair.

24. “Let There Be Rock” (1977)

The second song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. It’s also an example of Bon Scott practicing rock criticism. “The white man had the schmaltz / the black man had the blues,” he says, imparting his musicological knowledge like he’s Greil Marcus addressing the Hells Angels. Twenty-four years later, Patterson Hood of Drive By Truckers repurposed this song’s title on Southern Rock Opera for his own survey of golden-era late-’70s arena rock. In the final iteration of the chorus, he sings about seeing AC/DC on the Let There Be Rock tour, which clearly is the sort of experience that can inspire a person to form their own kick-ass rock band.

23. “Night Prowler” (1979)

Along with balls and rock ‘n’ roll, AC/DC likes to put “hell” in song titles. This is never a reference to an actual Satanic underworld, but rather a state of mind that can be defined as the opposite of whatever balls and rock ‘n’ roll signify. What’s confusing is that AC/DC always seems to be heading to hell or defending hell with backhanded praise (“it ain’t a bad place to be,” etc.). This naturally has caused religious and/or conservative types to attack the band as devil-worshipping lunatics.

These attacks reached their zenith in the mid-’80s when AC/DC was accused of inspiring “Night Stalker” serial killer Richard Ramirez after an AC/DC hat was found at a murder scene. The final track from Highway To Hell, “Night Prowler,” was specifically blamed for triggering Ramirez. But “Night Prowler” is not about pulling a burglary for the sake of murder. It’s about sneaking into your girlfriend’s house and having sex with her. This is what the band’s detractors could never understand: AC/DC makes love, not war.

22. “Moneytalks” (1990)

Granted: The U.S. military has used AC/DC’s music to unnerve enemy combatants. (https://www.chinadaily.com.cn/english/doc/2004-04/17/content_324146.htm) And the Young brothers have licensed their music to the U.S. Army for recruitment ads. Which seems weird, because when the brothers have delved into light political commentary, it’s come from a vaguely leftist perspective. Like “War Machine” from Black Ice, which sort of (but not really) inserted AC/DC into the 2008 U.S. presidential election cycle. And then there’s “Moneytalks from The Razors Edge, the album where Angus and Malcolm assumed lyricist duties from Brian Johnson, who presumably was too busy driving race cars and shopping for black undershirts to bother with putting pen to paper. “Moneytalks” can be simplistically described as a takedown of a gold digger and less simplistically characterized as a critique of capitalism’s dehumanizing effects on the middle class. It’s like Naomi Klein after a case of Foster’s.

21. “Live Wire” (1976)

Bon Scott was not interested in such matters. He instead applied his poetic skills to saluting the carnal act. This song features one of his finest verses: “Ah, cooler than a body on ice / Hotter than the rolling dice / Wilder than a drunken fight / You’re going to burn tonight.”

20. “Girls Got Rhythm” (1979)

You think you know what an AC/DC song called “Girls Got Rhythm” is going to be before you hear it. For starters, it’s probably not about a skilled female percussionist. And the lack of an apostrophe between the “L” and “S” denotes a certain low-class, dullard sensibility. But then you hear the song, and all presumptions are instantly voided. Two important attributes must be enumerated. One, “Girls Got Rhythm” appears to be about the sexual habits of a long-term committed couple, which almost makes it romantic. (It’s the hard-rock sister song to Al Green’s “I’m Still In Love With You.”) Two, Bon Scott rhymes “rhythm” with “rhythm” in the chorus, which denotes a certain high-class, dullard sensibility.

19. “Problem Child” (1976)

AC/DC is often classified as a metal band, even though the Young brothers are on record as disliking metal. Meanwhile, they are never classified as a punk band, though their early years coincided with the rise of punk and they had some backers (like legendary British DJ John Peel) in that scene. Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap is the closest AC/DC came to making an actual punk record. Bon’s voice is extra snotty throughout, and he sings aggressively about wanton violence, disreputable sex, and unbridled juvenilia. “Problem Child” is the roughest and rowdiest example of the latter, in which Bon declares, “What I want, I take / What I don’t, I break.” It’s not Johnny Rotten singing “Don’t know what I want but I know how to get it” but it’s in the same nihilistic ballpark.

18. “Sin City” (1978)

Powerage is my favorite AC/DC album, which apparently is the highbrow “connoisseur’s choice” record in the catalog. (“A lot of music types very much like that album,” Angus told Vulture in 2020.) It was the one they made after touring America for the first time, and you can hear that influence all over the record. For one thing, it has several songs about shooting guns, which became another recurring lyrical obsession on future records. And then there’s “Sin City,” where Bon uses Las Vegas as a metaphor for the American dream. “’Rich man, poor man/ beggar man, thief / Ain’t got a hope in hell / That’s my belief.” Nevertheless, he demands that you “bring on the dancing girls and put the champagne on ice,” because our boy is playing to win.

17. “Rock and Roll Ain’t Noise Pollution” (1980)

The third song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. It’s also another entry in the canon of AC/DC rock criticism, only this time it comes from Brian Johnson, the Lester Bangs to Bon’s Greil Marcus. Brian’s take on the music is more instinctual than historical — he wants you to know the music ain’t noise pollution, and that it’s not gonna die. In truth, Brian’s voice on this song is noise pollution, and I mean that in the best possible sense.

16. “Hell Ain’t A Bad Place To Be” (1977)

A moment must be taken to pay respects to Malcolm Young, the finest rhythm guitarist in rock history not named Keith Richards or Lou Reed. He held it down while his brother bacon-flopped in the spotlight, but for years before his death in 2017 he quietly commandeered the AC/DC machine. Former bassist Mark Evans called him “the driven one … the planner, the schemer, the ‘behind the scenes guy,’ ruthless and astute.” But it’s the sound of his thunderous Gretsch Jet Firebird that remains his greatest legacy. It is one of the most distinct and overpowering sonic signatures in all of hard rock, a musical sledgehammer that is both heavy and nimble. It’s such a satisfying sound that Malcolm, like Chuck Berry, could get away with playing dozens of variations on the same riff. Like “Hell Ain’t A Bad Place To Be,” which resembles at least 27 other AC/DC songs but somehow still sounds better than most of them. It’s a first-class iteration of The Malcolm Young Guitar Riff — kind of bluesy, super-duper simple, violently staccato, instantly catchy, and Pavlovian fodder for air-guitarists everywhere.

15. “If You Want Blood You Got It” (1978)

My favorite factoid about Malcolm Young is that before AC/DC he was in a psychedelic band called The Velvet Underground. Not The Velvet Underground, but rather a different group that happened to have the same name as the pioneering NYC proto-punk band. Of course, the mind naturally wanders to a highly unlikely hypothetical scenario where Malcolm does join The Velvet Underground, perhaps after John Cale leaves. Instead of Doug Yule, we get a pint-sized Australian who wants to divert his new band away from songs about heroin and S&M and toward tunes about gonads and street fighting.

Would this have worked out well? No, it would not. Thankfully, we live in world where “If You Want Blood You Got It” — another excellent iteration of The Malcolm Young Guitar Riff — exists.

14. “You Shook Me All Night Long” (1980)

Brian Johnson’s finest lyric. When it comes to one-liners about humping, you simply cannot do better than, “She told me to come / but I was really there.” But what really sells “You Shook Me All Night Long” is Phil Rudd. He is to the drums what Malcolm Young is to the guitar. He does nothing fancy, and he does it perfectly. AC/DC is among the precious few hard rock bands — particularly pre-hip-hop — that made dance music. Yes, the records are made primarily for head-banging and fist-pumping. But if you put on “You Shook Me All Night Long” in a club, people can actually shake their hips to it. And that is mostly due to Phil Rudd’s swinging caveman stomp.

13. “Shoot To Thrill” (1980)

The other important thing about Phil Rudd is that he was arrested in 2014 for — among other alleged crimes — attempting to hire a hitman. (He later rejoined the band after sorting out his legal issues.) Which means that Phil Rudd is the member of AC/DC whose personal life is most like an AC/DC song. For everybody else, “Shoot To Thrill” is merely a fictional exercise.

12. “TNT” (1976)

“Shoot To Thrill” reentered pop culture back in 2010 when it was prominently featured in one of the year’s highest grossing movies, Iron Man 2. Director Jon Favreau said he got the idea to use “Shoot To Thrill” while at an AC/DC concert with his wife and kids. And then he decided to make the entire soundtrack composed of AC/DC songs, which makes me wonder what would have happened had Favreau attended a Black Sabbath concert instead. (Seriously: How angry is Tony Iommi that he didn’t get to partake in all of that sweet MCU cash?)

“TNT” is on the Iron Man 2 soundtrack but it’s not in the movie. Which is a mistake, because that goon-squad chant at the start of the song — “Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! — is more rousing than any CGI effect.

11. “For Those About To Rock (We Salute You)” (1981)

The fourth song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. Back In Black was such a monumental success that following it up was going to be impossible. AC/DC ended up going into a creative ditch for most of the ’80s before finally staging a comeback with The Razors Edge in ’90. But in the immediate aftermath of Back In Black, they produced For Those About To Rock (We Salute You), their last effort with “Mutt” Lange. The album overall is pretty good, but they essentially — to use AC/DC-style verbiage — blew their load on the album-opening title track, which is so far away the best song on the record that I’m having trouble recalling any of the deep cuts. (I have vague memories of “Inject The Venom,” but don’t ask for any details about “Night Of The Long Knives.”)

10. “Rock ‘N’ Roll Damnation” (1978)

The fifth song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. My favorite Angus Young quote comes from the 2020 Vulture interview, when he talks about his lack of respect for being respectable. “We never set out for prizes or awards like that. If you asked me in my early 20s, I always thought of those people as uncool. It was an uncool world. My viewpoint was if something was on television, it was finished.”

This is the essential truth of AC/DC, the guiding philosophy that informs their artistic decisions and explains why they are so endearing. They are the most authentic “IDGAF” band in rock history. And they have consistently expressed this point of view from the beginning of their reign. You can hear it in “Rock ‘N’ Roll Damnation” in the way Bon Scott snidely asks, “You say that you want respect / honey, for what?” For what, indeed.

9. “Walk All Over You” (1979)

Peak Phil Rudd greatness. I must be alone when I’m listening to this song, because the part where the drums come in at the 61-second mark makes me want to punch a stranger in the face super hard.

8. “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” (1976)

A deeply weird song. In the first verse, Bon Scott offers to murder a high school student who is pressuring a classmate sexually. In the second verse, he extends his homicidal services to a woman who is being cheated on. In the third verse, he promises to kill a woman because she nags her partner too much. In the bridge, he lays out his methods, which include concrete shoes, cyanide, TNT, and electrocution — all of which seem inconvenient and inefficient.

“Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” is structured like an infomercial for manslaughter. The problem is that, on paper, Bon Scott does not seem like a very good hitman. (For starters, giving out your phone number in a song suggests that you are bad at evading the authorities.) But “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” does not exist on paper. It lurks inside your stereo speakers, and in that context, Bon Scott is absolutely credible as a low-rent assassin for hire. After all, I imagine these guys looking more like an intensely charismatic dirtbag than, say, Glen Powell.

7. “Whole Lotta Rosie” (1977)

I promised myself before I wrote this column that I would focus only on album tracks, and not include anything from the If You Want Blood live LP. Because without that self-imposed restriction, I would have put every single song from If You Want Blood on this list. It’s been difficult to hold back, but when it comes to “Whole Lotta Rosie” it feels all but impossible. The live version of this song is unbelievable. Pretty much any live version of “Whole Lotta Rosie” is unbelievable. This one might be the most unbelievable.

Have you noticed that I haven’t talked yet about the lyrics? That’s because I’m trying to figure out a way to discuss the subject matter of “Whole Lotta Rosie” in a manner that will not make me the main character on social media for 24-to-48 hours after this column publishes. And I’m having trouble coming up with the right combination of words that will accomplish this daunting feat. Again, my words for conveying what is great about AC/DC falls short. I’ll just paraphrase Bon Scott: When it comes to lovin’, “Whole Lotta Rosie” steals the show.

6. “Riff Raff” (1978)

The If You Want Blood version of this song is even more ferocious than “Whole Lotta Rosie”! Seriously, go take a 53-minute break from reading this and listen to that album at full volume on headphones. Then take a 15-minute cold shower and come back to your screen. I’ll be waiting.

5. “It’s A Long Way To The Top (If You Wanna Rock ‘N’ Roll)” (1976)

The sixth (and final) song on this list that references rock ‘n’ roll in the title. “It’s A Long Way To The Top” gained new notoriety in the early aughts after it was featured in School Of Rock, a film about children learning how to rock from a wild-eyed alcoholic musician in his 30s. Bon Scott was also a wild-eyed alcoholic musician in his 30s when this song was recorded. He knew about all the pitfalls of life on the road — you get robbed, you get beat up, you get had, you get took, and it’s all harder than it looks. But what amazes me (along with those righteous bagpipes) is that Bon had not yet seen the top of rock ‘n’ roll. He was calling his shot on the very first song on the very first AC/DC record, an act of chutzpah only matched by Oasis putting “Rock ‘N’ Roll Star” at the start of Definitely Maybe. If doing that is harder than it looks, it’s only because Bon made it look easy.

4. “Thunderstruck” (1990)

Angus’ epic wheedle-wheedle-wheedling throughout is the one instance in AC/DC’s discography where he’s trying to show you how incredible he is at playing guitar. If Beethoven had been born in 1955, he would have written that guitar part. But Beethoven wasn’t born in 1955, and he didn’t write “Thunderstruck.” Sorry that didn’t work out for you, Beethoven.

3. “Hells Bells” (1980)

At what point does a list of great AC/DC songs turn into a list of the most bad-ass jock jams? Nobody in AC/DC seems especially fit or gifted at playing sports, and yet their finest music perfectly suits the field of high-stakes professional competitions. When I hear “Hells Bells,” my mind immediately thinks that I’m watching an NFL game in late November between two AFC North teams that are tied with three minutes left in the fourth quarter. This is even more incredible when you consider Angus and Malcolm Young put together are still smaller than T.J. Watt.

2. “Highway To Hell” (1979)

The top two AC/DC songs on this list are chalk, because that is the way it must be. It just matters what order you put them in. “Highway To Hell” is Bon’s best lyric and his greatest vocal performance. You know how old actors looked like they were 40 when they were 25, because they had already been to war and they started smoking cigarettes at age 9 and life was just generally tougher back then? Bon Scott is like that, but for rock singers. He looked and sounded like he had seen some shit. And “Highway To Hell” is him showing that in the most natural and not-try hard manner imaginable.

1 “Back In Black” (1980)

The most representative song in the catalog. It’s from the Brian era, but it’s about the Bon era, so it feels like a bridge. It also has the best AC/DC guitar riff and the best AC/DC chorus. I don’t know that I can express how incredibly satisfying that chorus is. Come on, sing it with me, in the highest pitch scream you can muster:

‘Cause I’m back
Yes, I’m back
Well, I’m back
Yes, I’m back
Well, I’m back, back
Well, I’m back in black
Yes, I’m back in black

If you know, you know. Hey, are you going to eat that last wing? I’m still starving.

The United States has owned men’s basketball at the Olympic Games. Going back to the first time that the sport happened at the Olympics in 1936, the Americans have won 16 gold medals and 19 medals in total — the only time they were kept off the podium was in 1980, when the United States boycotted the Olympics altogether.

The tournament changed altogether in 1992, when NBA players became eligible to participate at the Olympics for the first time. Of course, that summer ended up being pretty notable, as the Dream Team went to Barcelona, steamrolled the competition, and became a cultural phenomenon. Since that time, the United States has only failed to win a gold medal once in men’s basketball.

Now, the rest of the world is starting to catch up to America in the sport, and while the 2024 team is loaded, the men’s basketball competition in Paris this summer is shaping up to be perhaps the greatest international basketball tournament of all time. Before that begins, we wanted to look at the eight teams the U.S. has sent to the Olympics since 1992 (including this year’s squad) and rank them from worst to best.

8. 2004

They came in third. Every other team that the U.S. has sent to the Olympics has won gold. Putting them last is pretty easy, even if it’s fun to look back on their roster — which featured Tim Duncan, Allan Iverson, and each of LeBron/Melo/Wade coming off of their rookie seasons — and wonder how they struggled as much as they did.

7. 2000

Despite not being the most talented roster the U.S. has ever sent over, this team still went undefeated en route to a gold, although a 2-point semifinal win over Lithuania nearly changed that. Still, Vince Carter was great (and authored the greatest in-game dunk in history), Kevin Garnett and Alonzo Mourning were imposing in the frontcourt, and the 1-2 backcourt punch of Jason Kidd and Gary Payton was not fun to play against.

6. 2020

They lost their opener at the Olympics to a really good France team and then did not lose again, which included getting their revenge on the French in the gold medal game. The 1-2 punch of Kevin Durant and Jayson Tatum was a nightmare for opposing teams to deal with — seriously, how are you supposed to deal with KD in international play? — and while they had their issues towards the end of the roster and with center depth, those ended up not being a huge problem in the end.

5. 1996

Being the team after the Dream Team was a hard act to follow, and yet the 1996 squad managed to do that incredibly well. They went undefeated in the tournament and stomped Yugoslavia in the gold medal game thanks to a monster performance from David Robinson. The Admiral was second on the team in scoring behind Charles Barkley, with Reggie Miller and Scottie Pippen also averaging double-digits. Not bad!

4. 2024

This is all a matter of projecting, but even if they don’t win a gold medal due to how loaded the rest of the field is, the 2024 team is absolutely ridiculous. We saw in their opener that this team has the potential to be excellent, as the addition of Kevin Durant to the roster is just unfair. We’ll possibly revisit this at the end of the tournament, because with how talented they are and how good the rest of the field is, there’s a chance they crack the top-3 with an especially dominant performance in Paris.

3. 2012

This group wasn’t as good as the first two as you got farther down the roster, but going into the Olympics with Kevin Durant, Carmelo Anthony, LeBron James, and Kobe Bryant is one heck of a luxury. They also beat the best team Spain has thrown out there in the gold medal game, in what is the best game any team on this list has ever played.

2. 2008

The level of competition they went up against was greater than the Dream Team. It’s not like this was a team of slouches, either, as the starting five featured the three best players on earth at the time (LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, Dwyane Wade), along with Olympic killer Carmelo Anthony and Dwight Howard when he was still at the height of his powers. They were dominant, and if you want to put them above the Dream Team, I would not blame you.

1. 1992

The question at the top is simple: Redeem Team or Dream Team? For my money, it’s more 1A and 1B than 1 and 2, but I’m giving the slight edge to the Dream Team because their roster was just that ridiculous. I do think it’s worth dinging them a little for the fact that the level of competition wasn’t especially high, as the rest of the world was nowhere near as competitive in men’s basketball at this point. But even if it was, I fully expect that this team would have cruised to a gold.

(Spoilers will be found below.)

House of the Dragon has returned to spectacle after taking a break to get super messy in a way that prompted odd backlash. This week, it’s all about those temperamental, fire-breathing beasts and a sudden realization by a character who is known to keep a stoic air under difficult circumstances.

Of course, we are talking about Aemond here, who still kept his usual resting b*tch face, but his actions revealed second thoughts after spotting his half-sister’s growing army of “low-born” dragonriders. This is a guy (now a prince regent, acting as leader of the Seven Realms) who previously did not hesitate to hurl a “dracarys” at his brother during an air bound altercation. He has also unflinchingly, hilariously stared down his smirking uncle, and yet Aemond knew that he’d been outmatched. Even with the absolute unit of Vhagar on Team Green’s side, it would have been deadly to begin fighting with a group of winged beasts that now includes Vermithor, the so-called “Bronze Fury”.

This pulled punch stands in contrast to the rest of the episode, which was filled with burning humans and legs sticking out of dragon mouths. In most cases, the beasts have been unimpressed with humans who wish to ride them, but we already saw Seasmoke choose Addam of Hull, and this week, two new dragonriders (Hugh Hammer and Ulf White) ascended.

Mysaria’s advice to Rhaenyra paid off again, and Aemond’s sudden decision to turn around and return to King’s Landing tells the tale. Mr. Badass is freaked out, and people love to see it:

If it’s any consolation prize, however, Aemond can mount a horse like no other:

HBO’s House of the Dragon airs on Sunday nights.

Sunday saw the first day of action for the women’s gymnastics competition, which meant arguably the biggest name on all of Team USA was in action in Simone Biles. The greatest gymnast of all time arrived in Paris looking to reassert herself on the Olympics stage after her well-documented bout with the twisties while in Tokyo that limited her to just competing in some of the team competition and on beam, and on Sunday she did just that with a phenomenal showing despite an injury scare.

Biles began her night on beam, where she delivered a sensational performance that set the tone for an incredible night for both Biles and the American women with a high score of 14.733.

Her next apparatus was floor exercise, but disaster nearly struck as she hobbled off the floor after her warmup with a calf issue that required her to get taped up and had her using a foam roller trying to keep it loose. She was clearly bothered by it, telling her teammates she’s going to need “a wheelchair”, but never blinked once it was time to continue competing. Her floor routine was, again, vintage Biles, posting the highest score again with a 14.600.

Biles then went over to the vault, where she did the most difficult vault in gymnastics — the Biles II — and nailed it (if anything over-rotating just a touch to force a hop), once again earning the highest score of the round with a ridiculous 15.800.

Her final event was the uneven bars, where she removed the unique skill from her routine she had submitted to the International Gymnastics Federation earlier in the week. She still did very well with the routine she performed, earning a more-than-solid score of 14.433, but it was not quite enough to qualify for the uneven bars individual competition, as she ended up ninth, with the top 8 qualifying.

Still, Biles leads the all-around competition (59.566) by almost two full points over Brazil’s Rebeca Andrade (57.700), and could up her score some if she works her new skill back into the uneven bars. She’ll also be the gold medal favorite in floor, vault, and beam, leading in all three events in the qualification round.

In the team competition, Team USA (172.296) finished well ahead of Italy (166.861) in the qualification round, as they had three of the four highest all-around scores with Suni Lee and Jordan Chiles also having a great night, while Jade Carey qualified for the vault individual final. What’s scary is there’s room to get better if Carey and Hezly Rivera can post higher scores on floor, beam, and bars, but all eyes will be on Biles’ pursuit of four more golds and whether her calf will allow her to be at her best to do so.

One of the great things about the Olympics is that it can turn stars in relatively niche sports into icons on a national and international stage, at least for a few weeks. While we typically see swimmers, track stars, and gymnasts burst into the national consciousness at the Summer Games, sometimes other smaller sports (or, more accurately, smaller in the United States) can see an athlete turn into a household name.

This year, that athlete may be rugby star Ilona Maher, who is certainly not an unknown — she has amassed 1.3 million followers on Instagram — but wasn’t someone who came into the Olympics on the radar of a lot of sports fans. Maher’s built that social media following by being incredibly funny off the pitch, but on it she is an absolute beast. That’s a good combination of charisma and talent, and as Team USA got rolling on Sunday in a 36-7 rout of Japan, that saw Maher author one of the highlights of the day when she stiff armed a poor Japanese player straight to hell on a scoring run.

This is straight out of the Derrick Henry playbook and Maher looks like a similarly freakish combination of size, speed, and power on the rugby pitch that Henry is on the gridiron. There are few things American sports fans love more than a big, strong athlete that throws around opponents, so if Maher keeps doing this she will end up as one of the faces of this year’s Olympics — and maybe we can revive “JACKED UP!” for rugby.

Netflix cornered the market on addictive TV series for years, but Prime Video subscribers now know to not sleep on Amazon’s commitment to streaming crowd pleasers. From The Boys series to the cross-quadrant Reacher, the service’s abundance of appealing series is growing pleasurably ridiculous. Heck, the latter selection has even reignited interest in the not-as-well-received movies, but will that be the case with the new Cross series?

Aldis Hodge will star as the titular detective of James Patterson novels after multiple cinematic efforts starring Morgan Freeman and Tyler Perry. Let’s discuss why this show will be the next great-detective bingewatch.

Plot

Thus far, Amazon hasn’t revealed whether the show will make Alex Cross genuinely sexy (as opposed to Patterson’s sex-prose), so that Aldis Hodge might pull an Alan Ritchson by talking about naked-scene workouts, but TV’s Alex Cross will not be a slouch in the physique department, as an interrogation scene in a trailer reveals. Yes, that’s a superficial way to begin this discussion, although it’s fair to assume that Alex Cross’ guns will be the subject of online discussion. Amazon is so confident in the leading man’s magnetic ways, in fact, that this series has already been renewed for a second season.

Substance is also of the utmost importance, of course. James Patterson’s Alex Cross — who becomes laser-focused when he’s on a case — will surpass Jack Reacher’s (unexplainable and rather silly) powers of deduction as a brilliant and heralded forensic psychologist and detective who is “uniquely capable of digging into the psyches of killers and their victims, in order to identify—and ultimately capture—the murderers.” That descriptor will be familiar to Patterson’s readers, but Cross will assure a defendant that he is “living rent free” in this criminal’s head, regardless of whether he chooses to comply with a confession. Of course, due process is key to prosecution, but Cross is known to deliver results after working his interrogation magic.

Patterson has gone on record with LA Mag to reveal how the TV show, which he very much enjoys, will be slightly “edgier” than his novels:

“It’s a little edgier, which I really like, and it’s a little more realistic. I’ve said it before, but I don’t really write realism. Sometimes, people will go, ‘Well, this isn’t very realistic,’ and I go, ‘Well, that’s not really a relevant criticism because I don’t write realism.’ You can say, ‘I don’t like it,’ and that’s a reasonable criticism, but it’s not realism because I don’t write realism.”

Cross is also the subject of 30+ books, so (like Reacher) we can expect this show to continue into infinity as long as the audience keeps watching. We’ll find out soon whether this crime thriller satisfies enough to move beyond the already in-the-works second season. From the first-season synopis:

Based on NY Times Bestselling author James Patterson’s #1 hero, Cross is a crime thriller that follows the investigations of brilliant forensic psychologist and DC Metro Detective Alex Cross. Together with his best friend and partner Detective John Sampson, Cross delves into the psyches of America’s most insidious killers while fighting to protect his family from the dangers of the criminal world.

Cast

Aldis Hodge will make the Alex Cross role his own after multiple portrayals by Perry and Freeman. First season cast members include Isaiah Mustafa, Samantha Walkes, Jennifer Wigmore, Eloise Mumford, Ryan Eggold, Juanita Jennings, Alona Tal, Caleb Elijah, Melody Hurd, and Johnny Ray Gill.

Amazon has already announced second-season cast members Matthew Lillard, Wes Chatham, and Jeanine Mason.

Release Date

The eight episodes of the first season stream on November 14, 2024. The second-season release date has yet to be announced.

Trailer

As seen below, criminals will attempt to outsmart Cross, but they shall fail.

Tom Cruise‘s “previous” filmography on IMDb speaks for itself. But his “upcoming” projects aren’t too shabby, either.

Mission: Impossible 8 is the headliner, of course, but there’s also a rumored sequel to Edge of Tomorrow (Live Die Repeat and Repeat is the working title), the “gnarly” R-rated movie The Gauntlet with Scarlett Johansson, director Alejandro G. Iñárritu’s first English-language feature since The Revenant, and, maybe most intriguely, Untitled Tom Cruise/SpaceX Project, which for the sake of brevity I’ll henceforth call Tom Cruise Space Movie. (Top Gun 3 isn’t listed, but Glen Powell recently gave a promising update.)

Here’s everything we know about Tom Cruise Space Movie, including plot details and whether there’s a release date.

Plot

In Tom Cruise Space Movie, the death-defying actor is aiming to become “the first civilian to do a spacewalk” outside of the International Space Station, according to Universal Pictures head Donna Langley. She teased to BBC in 2022 that the plot, which Cruise and director Doug Liman (Edge of Tomorrow, The Bourne Identity) pitched to her during the pandemic, “actually takes place on earth, and then the character needs to go up to space to save the day.”

Cruise will play a “down-on-his-luck guy who finds himself in the position of being the only person who could save Earth.” Been there.

But who will be the one to send Cruise to space? Unfortunately, this is where Elon Musk — and his SpaceX company — enters the picture. “Tom Cruise has said he wants to do Mission: Impossible in space. We’ve had some discussions, but I’m not sure where his mind is at,” Musk said earlier this year, seemingly conflating the Mission: Impossible franchise with this stand-alone film. There haven’t been any updates on SpaceX’s involvement in years, however.

Earlier this year, Cruise announced a partnership with Warner Bros., but Universal will foot the reported $200 million bill for his adventures in space.

Cruise could earn somewhere between $30 million and $60 million, according to insiders. This would cover his services as a producer and star, and also be comprised of significant first-dollar gross participation over a windfall up front… The inherent marketing value around a global event like this is obvious. Similar to the historic launch of SpaceX’s Dragon crew vessel, the entire world will watch as Cruise is rocketed into space, forcing natural curiosity around the results. The stakes are also high from a filmmaking standpoint. As one person familiar with the project put it, “you can’t be sure what you’re going to get up there, and you have one shot to do it.”

There haven’t been many updates lately because Cruise has been focused on Mission: Impossible 8, and there’s always a chance the project could be scrapped. But in 2023, he told Variety, “We’ve been working on it diligently and we’ll see where we go.” Hopefully where no actor has gone before.

Cast

So far, the cast is Tom Cruise and… that’s it. Maybe it could be an Edge of Tomorrow reunion with Emily Blunt?

Release Date

Tom Cruise Space Movie does not have a release date…

Trailer

… or a trailer. So, instead, here’s the insane opening to Austin Powers in Goldmember, featuring Cruise as Austin Powers and Gwyneth Paltrow as Dixie Normous (and, uh, Kevin Spacey as Dr. Evil, emphasis on evil).

On July 26, the world collective mourned as the day marked Sinéad O’Connor death anniversary. It has officially been one year since the “Nothing Compares 2 U” singer and activist’s passing.

Since then the late entertainer’s friends and peers have come together for tribute during the Grammys as well as a concert. In January, it was shared that O’Connor died from natural causes. Yesterday (July 27), the details surrounding her cause of death were revealed.

According to The Irish, Sinead O’Connor’s official cause of death as listed on her death certificate was a combination of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) and asthma.

The report claims that prior to her passing, O’Connor was “suffering from a respiratory tract infection.” John Reynolds, O’Connor’s one time husband,
supposedly registered the information with the appropriate offices on July 24 in Lambeth, London.

The Irish also reports that Julian Morris, senior coroner for Inner South London, certified Sinead O’Connor’s death certificate following a post-mortem examination without an inquest (at the request of the family).

Additional notation on Sinead O’Connor’s death certificate reportedly outlined the extend of her respiratory infection prior to her death, sayinf: “Exacerbation of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and bronchial asthma together with low grade lower respiratory tract infection.”