Year: 2024

Pollen isn’t the only thing in the air, so is love. Earlier in the week, Eminem walked his daughter down the aisle. But, the “Stan” rapper wasn’t the only music legend to add father-in-law to their resume.

According to TMZ, actor Millie Bobby Brown and Jon Bon Jovi’s son, Jake Bongiovi reportedly tied the knot in a secret ceremony. Based on the outlet’s report and latest photographs, the couple were spotted yesterday (May 24) wearing fresh wedding bands.

A source close to The Sun, the ceremony took place around May 18. “Millie and Jake quietly said their vows in America last weekend,” they said. “They are planning a bigger ceremony in the US later this year, but now they have legally married and done all the paperwork. It was a very low-key, romantic affair, with their closest family with them as they said their vows.”

If you were worried that their young ages (Millie, 20 and Jake, 22), Jon Bon Jovi sure isn’t. On May 2, during an appearance on Andy Cohen’s Sirius XM show Radio Andy, he repeated the advice he gave the couple.

“I don’t know if age matters,” he said. “You know, if you find the right partner and you grow together. I think that would be my advice, really, is growing together is wise, growing together. And so I think that all my kids have found the people that they think they can grow together, and we like them all.”

It’s not revolutionary news that smoking wreaks havoc on your body in different ways. More often than not, however, the focus of anti-smoking campaigns is on your internal health, citing emphysema, heart disease, and lung cancer, to name just a few consequences.

While the superficial effects may not be as lethal, appealing to people’s sense of vanity can have a powerful effect as this clever gallery below shows. Twins, only one of whom smokes, sit side by side, showing the profound damage smoking can cause to your face, hair, and teeth.

The twins’ circumstances vary in each set of pictures, but the differences and effects are undeniable. In some instances, one of the twins never smoked. In others, the “smoking” twin had smoked for at least five years longer than the other “non-smoking” twin.

Though they’re not common knowledge, the effects of smoking on your appearance are predictable and consistent. You can identify a smoker with ease if you know what you’re looking for. Harmful smoke, dehydration, and even the heat from a burning cigarette can damage your complexion, hair, and eyes. The photos below helpfully point out the symptoms and effects on the smoking twin.

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The photos here were taken from those of 79 pairs of identical twins at the Twins Days Festival in Twinsburg, Ohio. Though they weren’t taken with this use in mind, that allows them to serve as an even more powerful testament to the effects as perceived by casual observers.

1. The eyes are a strong “tell” if someone’s a smoker or not. In this photo, the smoker is the man on the right. He has smaller, more sunken eyes and carries more wrinkles throughout his face than his twin on the left. You’ll also notice his hairline has receded further than his brother’s. That’s a little-known though hardly surprising effect of smoking habitually.

2. Here, the difference is profound. Though they’re the same age, they look almost like they represent different generations. The smoking twin on the right has done so for 16 years, and it’s manifested in a number of ways. Most noticeable is the pervasive discoloration of her skin compared to her twin on the left. Less noticeable, but still apparent, is the damage done to her lips, eyes, and even her hair. It’s difficult to believe they’re even related, let alone twins.

3. This comparison is less glaring but still apparent. The twin on the left is the smoker. You can see many more pronounced wrinkles on her forehead, under her eyes, and around her nose. There are also pronounced bags under her eyes.

4. In this comparison, the smoking twin only smokes about two cigarettes per day, so the difference will be less profound. The twin on the right is the smoker. The differences are on the subtle side, mostly the more damaged hair and the squintier eyes.

5. Based on what you’ve read in the earlier side by side pics, you might be able to ID the right twin as the smoker due to the discolored and receding hair as well as the aged skin.

6. These two twins are both elderly, so the differences are slightly less pronounced. Though the left twin has more graying hair, it’s the right twin that’s the smoker. She’s got a droopier face, especially on the outside of the eyes. The wrinkles are also more pronounced in the brow and upper lip.

7. Though the two sisters here are also older, it’s easier to distinguish the smoker. The left sister bears the hallmarks all over her skin. Her cheek, outer eye, and neck all look weathered from her habit. Not only is she more wrinkled, but the skin has begun to discolor from the fair tone her sister has.

8. Here it’s pretty difficult to tell. The woman on the left is the smoker. She sports slightly discolored lips that are upon inspection, more wrinkled than her sister’s. Since the lips are the most proximate to the smoke, they are a pretty telling feature when it comes to identifying smokers.

The pics above show a lot of singular traits that can call out a smoker, but it can be a lot more simple than that. Speaking to the NY Daily News, dermatologist Elizabeth Tanzi from George Washington Medical Center dispenses with the jargon, stating, “Smoking makes you look old. That’s all there is to it.”

This article originally appeared on 11.01.16

A lot of parents are tired of being told how technology is screwing up their kids.

Moms and dads of the digital age are well aware of the growing competition for their children’s attention, and they’re bombarded at each turn of the page or click of the mouse with both cutting-edge ideas and newfound worries for raising great kids.

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But beneath the madness of modernity, the basics of raising a moral child haven’t really changed.

Parents want their kids to achieve their goals and find happiness, but Harvard researchers believe that doesn’t have to come at the expense of kindness and empathy. They say a few tried-and-true strategies remain the best ways to mold your kids into the morally upstanding and goals-oriented humans you want them to be.

Here are six practical tips:

1) Hang out with your kids.

This is, like, the foundation of it all. Spend regular time with your kids, ask them open-ended questions about themselves, about the world and how they see it, and actively listen to their responses. Not only will you learn all sorts of things that make your child unique, you’ll also be demonstrating to them how to show care and concern for another person.

2) If it matters, say it out loud.

According to the researchers, “Even though most parents and caretakers say that their children being caring is a top priority, often children aren’t hearing that message.” So be sure to say it with them. And so they know it’s something they need to keep up with, check in with teachers, coaches, and others who work with your kids on how they’re doing with teamwork, collaboration, and being a generally nice person.

3) Show your child how to “work it out.”

Walk them through decision-making processes that take into consideration people who could be affected. For example, if your child wants to quit a sport or other activity, encourage them to identify the source of the problem and consider their commitment to the team. Then help them figure out if quitting does, in fact, fix the problem.

4) Make helpfulness and gratitude routine.

The researchers write, “Studies show that people who engage in the habit of expressing gratitude are more likely to be helpful, generous, compassionate, and forgiving — and they’re also more likely to be happy and healthy.” So it’s good for parents to hold the line on chores, asking kids to help their siblings, and giving thanks throughout the day. And when it comes to rewarding “good” behavior, the researchers recommend that parents “only praise uncommon acts of kindness.”

5) Check your child’s destructive emotions.

“The ability to care for others is overwhelmed by anger, shame, envy, or other negative feelings,” say the researchers. Helping kids name and process those emotions, then guiding them toward safe conflict resolution, will go a long way toward keeping them focused on being a caring individual. It’s also important to set clear and reasonable boundaries that they’ll understand are out of love and concern for their safety.

6) Show your kids the bigger picture.

“Almost all children empathize with and care about a small circle of families and friends,” say the researchers. The trick is getting them to care about people who are socially, culturally, and even geographically outside their circles. You can do this by coaching them to be good listeners, by encouraging them to put themselves in other people’s shoes, and by practicing empathy using teachable moments in news and entertainment.

The study concludes with a short pep talk for all the parents out there:

“Raising a caring, respectful, ethical child is and always has been hard work. But it’s something all of us can do. And no work is more important or ultimately more rewarding.”

This article originally appeared on 06.16.15

Gordon Ramsay is not exactly known for being nice.

Or patient.

Or nurturing.

On his competition show “Hell’s Kitchen,” he belittles cooks who can’t keep up. If people come to him with their problems, he berates them. If someone is struggling to get something right in the kitchen, he curses them out.

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His whole TV persona is based on being the world’s worst boss.

Ramsay went on Reddit and allowed users to ask him any question they wanted.

So when a fellow cook asked him a sincere, deeply personal question about what to do when you’ve hit a roadblock in your career, you could probably guess what was coming.

Indeed, I thought the guy was making a terrible mistake pouring his heart out to a chef as notoriously tough as Ramsay:

“My hopes and dreams are nowhere to be found as I scale and portion salmon after salmon, shelling pods after pods of broad beans.
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Sometimes I look out the tiny window and I can see people walking around the streets, enjoying the sunlight, while I’m here, questioning my dedication to this art as I rotate stock in the cool room, getting frost bitten, but the fear of the chef stops me from stepping outside to warm up.
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The closest thing to feeling any kind of joy I get is those rare moments when I walk through the dining room near the end of service to get some coffee for everyone, and there will be a few diners left, idly sampling those little petite fours that we’ve painstakingly ensured are all perfectly round, identical, and just plain delicious. Then, one of them will stop the conversation they’re having with their company, look up from their food and say, ‘Thank you, chef. This is delicious,’ and making the previous 14-hours of sweat and tears kind of worthwhile.

My question is, how did you deal with it? How the fuck did you deal with all the bullshit, Gordon?”

But the way Ramsay responded? Totally amazing. And completely unexpected.

Turns out, real-life Gordon Ramsay? He actually can be a really kind, big-hearted dude.

He’s sympathetic to the guy. Not just because he’s a good person. But because he’s been there.

Working in restaurants is a tough, tough business. As of 2012, the average salary for cooks was less than $23,000/year. And those who are just starting out often have to work unglamorous, tedious jobs that no one else wants to do. Ramsay didn’t have fancy culinary school training. He rose up through the ranks putting in long hours for low pay in kitchens all over the world. That’s why he gets it.

Which brings up another point.

Diet Dieting GIF by Bobbi DeCarlo – Find & Share on GIPHY

When we go out to eat, we, as a culture, tend to behave … how should I put this?

Let’s go with “not like perfect angels.”

Of course, no one likes getting the wrong order. Or waiting a really long time for a meal. Or eating something that doesn’t taste the way you expect it to.

But it’s important to remember that the people behind the food, like Ramsay’s anonymous letter-writer, might be working 14-hour days. Or might be a recent immigrant who speaks limited English, trying to support a family thousands of miles away. And possibly making very little money. And sure, they screw up sometimes. But we all screw up at our jobs sometimes.

Because they, like the rest of us, are human beings.

Which is why saying…

“Thank you, chef. This is delicious.”

Could mean everything to someone.

This article originally appeared on 04.22.15

“The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize.” ― Robert Hughes

Great artists tend to live life swimming in a vast ocean of self-doubt. It’s that special blend of insecurity and perfectionism that fuels their desire to hone their craft and get better with each piece.

But that self-doubt can also be paralyzing and prevent potential artists from picking up the pen, paintbrush or guitar.

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To encourage his mother to stick with her art, Reddit user Gaddafo shared a picture of his mother, Cindi Decker, a school teacher from Florida, holding a lovely painting she made of an egret.

“My mom painted this and said no one would like it. It’s her 2nd painting,” he wrote.

Then Reddit user Cacahahadoodoo asked the forum to take the post a step further. “Someone paint the photo of his mom holding her painting and repost it with the same title for extra extra karma,” they wrote.

Karma is a reward earned for posting popular content on the online forum.

Reddit user u/k__z jumped on the task and painted a picture of Decker holding her painting.

Then lillyofthenight took things a step further by painting a picture of herself holding a painting of u/k__z holding his painting of Decker holding her painting of an egret.

“Took a while and not perfect, but I painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom,” she wrote.

Then seamusywray stepped in with his contribution and things started to get freaky. “I painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom who painted an egret,” he wrote.

This kicked off a chain reaction that’s come to be known “paintception.”

To keep things from getting too confusing, another Redditor created an interactive tree to show how they paintings relate to one another.

Decker was shocked by the chain reaction and couldn’t believe she inspired so many people to paint.

“Even though people say, ‘You inspired me to paint,’ I don’t know that it was so much me. I really give credit to the first artist who painted,” she told the CBC. “You know, I’m not a painter. I’m just somebody who went out and did a little painting thing, so I got lucky to get caught up in all this fun craziness.”

The question is: will the craziness ever end?

This article originally appeared on 02.02.19

When Jimmy Kimmel takes to the street, you know you’re in for a good laugh at just how little we actually know about, well, seemingly anything. That goes for anatomy too. In this case, female anatomy.

In a segment called “What Do You Know About The Female Body?” men try—and hilariously fail—to answer even the most basic questions, like “does a female have one uterus, or two?” much to the amazement of some of their female partners.

Here are some of the very best bits of nonwisdom:

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Woman have LOTS of fallopian tubes and ovaries, apparently.

When asked, “how many fallopian tubes does the average lady have?” one man prefaced with “I know I’m gonna be way off,” before answering “four.”

He was right about being way off, indeed. Women usually have one fallopian tube on either side of the uterus, making that two fallopian tubes.

Another guy guessed that a woman has not one, not two, but six ovaries. Which, in case you didn’t know, is three times more than the correct answer (two ovaries, one on either side of the uterus). Where would a woman keep four extra ovaries? Her purse?

A mammogram examines the stomach.

The interviewer also asked: “What part of the body does the mammogram examine?”

“The lower half…” replied one man. Yikes.

And when asked to demonstrate where exactly the “lower half” is, he gestured toward the uppermost part of his belly, seemingly avoiding the actual area a mammogram covers entirely.

PMS is all in the mind, but only annually.

The next question up was “What does PMS stand for?”

One man shyly answered, “Post…mental…syndrome?”

One outta three ain’t bad. But the correct answer is premenstrual syndrome.

And it definitely happens more than “once a year.”

An IUD is a “mammogram device.”

Oh, and a NuvaRing is a “pap schmear,” and a speculum is the actual “IUD.” Holy moly, if you thought IUDs were uncomfortable before…

Things really took a turn once the graphics came out.

And men were asked to point to where the cervix is. Plenty of things were pointed at—like the uterus. But sadly, no cervix findings.

Changing gears, the interview instructed the men to “point at something you know.”

To which one man replied (inaccurately) “uh…that’s a baby?”

Unless the woman is giving birth to a colon, that was incorrect.

Later in the video, a man is asked “where does the baby go?”

“In there,” the man answers after pointing to the ovaries. (Spoiler alert: It doesn’t go there. A fetus grows in the uterus, which this man thought was the cervix.)

His wife, a gynecologist no less, chuckled “I’m mortified…I’m apparently not a very good educator at home for my husband.”

Though this is just for pure fun, it is food for thought.

A woman’s autonomy over her own body has been the subject of much controversial discussion lately. And I can’t help but wonder how certain politicians/leaders would fare if given the same questions. Perhaps it is unwise to try to govern that which is not fully understood, just saying.

This article originally appeared on 01.14.22

Not everyone enjoys flying. The level of non-enjoyment can range from mild discomfort to full blown Aerophobia, which is defined as an extreme fear of flying. While flying is the quickest way to get to far away destinations, for some people being that far off the ground is terrifying and they’d rather take their chances on the ground.

A passenger flying from Charlotte-Douglas International Airport in North Carolina to JFK International Airport in New York confronted that fear while flying with Delta. The woman, who is currently still unidentified expressed that she was nervous to fly according to Molly Simonson Lee, a passenger seated behind the woman who witnessed the encounter. Tight spaces don’t make for much privacy, but in this case, the world is better for knowing this took place.

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According to Lee, who posted about the exchange on Facebook, the Delta flight attendant, Floyd Dean-Shannon, took his time to give the nervous traveler his undivided attention. Lee told Upworthy the unidentified passenger, “was very nervous and even before the plane took off, she was visibly shaken by each sound.”

Approximately 25 million people in the United States have Aerophobia according to the Clevland Clinic and most of them probably wish Dean-Shannon was on their flights. “He took notice and began explaining what each [sound] was, with the warmest, calmest tone,” Lee said. That wasn’t even the most amazingly sweet part of the story.

While the explanation of noises helped, Lee said about halfway through the flight the passenger was fighting back tears, which prompted Dean-Shannon to sit on the floor and hold the frightened passenger’s hand. He comforted her for the rest of the flight while sitting on the floor. “His tone was so kind and soothing,” according to Lee.

Dean-Shannon’s kindness didn’t stop there. Lee explained, “the woman next to me was celebrating a birthday and he sang to her and made her a ‘cake’ with all of the goodies he could round up.”

I’m not sure what Delta pays him but he needs a raise immediately and it seems the people of the interwebs agree.

Commenter, Miranda Anderson, tagged Delta Airlines and wrote, “I hope you see this! These are the types of people that deserve raises and make your company worth flying with. This is what pits [sic] you above the others so show these employees this is what you want and what you need.”

“I love this. This is what society is lacking. Empathy and kindness towards people in time[s] of need” wrote Diane Lawrence.

While Mary Beth Acker Ford, said, “I was on a flight with him today. He exudes joy and is intentional about making a connection with each person!”

This level of engagement with passengers is not a common experience but clearly people are happy to see this type of connection between humans. Flying anywhere can be stressful for any amount of reasons. From leaving the house late and having to participate in an involuntary 5k to catch your flight, to making your way through the devil’s backyard, also known as Atlanta International Airport…just for them to change your gate 10 minutes before boarding.

So having a flight attendant like Dean-Shannon is just the breath of fresh air people need. “The way he’s looking at her…letting her know she’s safe!!! This is just one of the many reasons I will always fly Delta Air Lines,” Liz Martin wrote in the comments.

“It was obvious he is just a good, kind soul who shares that generously with everyone he encounters. Such kindness is rare and a true gift when encountered,” Lee remarked. That level of kindness is rare indeed and we sure are happy someone thought to capture it.

This article originally appeared on 01.19.23

Meghan Smith is the owner of Melody Note Vintage store in the eternally hip town of Palm Springs, California, and her old-school Gen X advice has really connected with younger people on TikTok.

In a video posted in December 2022, she shares the advice she wishes that “somebody told me in my twenties” and it has received more than 13 million views. Smith says that she gave the same advice to her partner’s two daughters when they reached their twenties.

The video is hashtagged #GenX advice for #GenZ and late #millennials. Sorry older millennials, you’re too old to receive these pearls of wisdom.

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Here is some of the timeless advice that Smith shares in the video.

Perfection is bullshit.

You will never be more good-looking than you are today.

Put your phone down and enjoy your life.

Don’t change for anybody.

Don’t worry about making mistakes.

Laugh at yourself.

If somebody shows you their true colors, believe them.

Travel.

You end up dating the people you think you deserve. Usually, you deserve better.

Don’t forget to always wear your sunscreen.

@melodynotevintage

This might only help one person and thats ok. Advice I wish somebody told me in my twenties. #genx advice for #genz and late #millennials #adviceforyour20s #lifeadvice #fyp dont be an asshat in the comments if you are older, its not helpful.

She followed up the video with a sequel with even more sage advice.

Know who’s on your side and who you can ask for help.

Don’t smoke.

Don’t spend longer than one year with the wrong person.

Find your own style.

Don’t stress over the small stuff.

Good manners don’t go out of style.

Do the work that it takes to be really good at something.

Your happiness is more important than other people’s disappointment.

@melodynotevintage

This might only help one person and thats ok. Advice I wish somebody told me in my twenties part 2 #genx advice for #genz and late #millennials #adviceforyour20s #lifeadvice #fyp

This article originally appeared on 1.18.23

We recently asked our Upworthy audience on Facebook, “What’s something that you really enjoy that other people can’t seem to understand?” and over 1,700 people weighed in. Some people shared things like housework, cleaning and laundry, which a lot of people see as chores. Others shared different puzzles or forms of art they like doing, and still others shared things like long car rides or grocery shopping.

But one answer dominated the list of responses. It came in various wordings, but by far the most common answer to the question was “silent solitude.” Here are a few examples:

“Feeling perfectly content, when I’m all alone.”

“Being home. Alone. In silence.”

“That I enjoy being alone and my soul is at peace in the silence. I don’t need to be around others to feel content, and it takes me days to recharge from being overstimulated after having an eventful day surrounded by others.”

“Enjoying your own company. Being alone isn’t isolating oneself. It’s intentional peace and healthy… especially for deep feelers/thinkers.”

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Spending time by ourselves is something some of us relish, while some of us hate being alone. Naturally, this points to the common theory of introversion vs. extraversion, but in some ways, that’s overly simplistic. Even the most peopley people among us can enjoy some quality alone time, and not all introverts see time alone as truly enjoyable. (It might be necessary for an introvert’s well-being, but not necessarily something they truly revel in.)

Interesting, studies have found that people who enjoy being alone are not any more or less extraverted than those who don’t, though they do tend to be less “sociable.” They are also less likely to be neurotic (tense, moody, worrying types) than the generally population and more likely to be open-minded. Those characteristics are the opposite of what social norms often tell us about people who want to be alone.

“If our stereotypes about people who like being alone were true, then we should find that they are neurotic and closed-minded. In fact, just the opposite is true,” writes Bella DePaulo, PhD.

There may be lots of reasons some people like to spend time by themselves while others don’t. We are naturally social creatures and need social interaction, but some of us find ourselves overstimulated by being around other people all the time. On the flip side, some people find being alone not just unenjoyable, but extremely uncomfortable, which can be a problem.

“Ideally, we should be comfortable with ourselves, alone or with others,” writes psychologist Tara Well Ph.D.. “If you are uncomfortable being alone, it means you are uncomfortable being with yourself without distraction, engagement, or affirmation from others. This can be a liability in life. If you cannot be alone, you may stay in situations or make life choices that aren’t good for you in the long run, like staying in a job or a relationship, mainly because you can’t tolerate being alone while transitioning to a better situation.”

Dr. Well also points out that people can make the most of their alone time, even if it’s not something they naturally enjoy. One way is to make it purposeful, setting aside a little time daily to write in a journal, meditate, go for a walk or otherwise engage your mind and body in some form of reflection. Another is to pay attention to self-judgments that might make alone time uncomfortable and challenge them with some compassionate confrontation and counteraction with positive thoughts about yourself.

Alone time can be refreshing and rewarding, especially if it’s something you naturally crave. Some people even like to take themselves out on dates or enjoy traveling by themselves. That kind of self-care can be just as important as connecting with others for our overall health and well-being. Being alone doesn’t mean being a loner and it doesn’t mean being lonely. Some of us genuinely like having quality time with ourselves, whether it makes sense to other people or not.

This article originally appeared on 1.1.24

In December of 2022, a American Pit Bull Terrier named Mara was hours away from being euthanized at a high-kill shelter in Georgia. Rocky Kanaka shares that the one-year-old pup had been languishing in the shelter for over a month with no one showing interest in her until a rescue group called Braveheart Bulliez stepped in to save her.

Pit Bulls are often stereotyped and misunderstood, but Mara’s rescuers saw past all of that. “As soon as we saw her photos, we knew we had to help,” Braveheart Bulliez’s founder Krystle Carrara shared with Rocky Kanaka. “She had the most soulful, trusting eyes.”

But Mara’s rescue journey was just beginning.

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Braveheart Bulliez had secured a foster home for her and hired a paid trainer to do in-home training, but within a few weeks the foster bailed without explanation. On top of that, two people who had agreed to sponsor Mara’s rescue journey also bailed, so she was left high and dry with nowhere to go.

In January of 2023, Braveheart Bulliez sent Mara to a well-respected boarding and training program. She took to training like a champ, becoming a “phenomenal” leash walker and learning not to react to other dogs on leash. She was also muzzle trained to be with other dogs in doggy play time.

“She blew everyone away with how smart and willing to learn she was,” said Carrara.

However, no matter how hard they tried, Mara’s rescuers couldn’t find a foster or adoptive home for her. Reaching out to rescues across the country yielded no results. She ended up being boarded for another 10 months, which wasn’t good for her physically or mentally.

Finally, an almost-perfect foster for Mara came along. Someone had filled out an application expressing interest in fostering a special needs dog. “As soon as we read it, we realized this person would be perfect for Mara,” Carrara said. “We took a chance and reached out, and incredibly, they agreed to foster her.”

There was just one problem—they were planning on moving overseas within six months, so they wouldn’t be able to keep her that long. That foster has been caring for Mara since January 2024, but now it’s time for them to leave—and time for Mara to find her furever family.

If Mara doesn’t find a home, there will be no choice but to send her back into boarding, where she completely shut down after spending more than a years there. No one who knows her wants that for her.

“Mara is a beautiful girl, fully trained, and simply needs to be in a home as an only dog. She is very smart and LOVES human attention. She loves car rides, long walks/hikes, and LOVES PUP CUPS!” the rescue shares. “She MUST be the only dog in the home. However, Mara is fully muzzle trained and only needs it if she is near other dogs (in doggy day care). This darling girl has been failed by humans over and over again. But we never gave up on her, and she knows that. We will do whatever it takes to find this wonderful pup her perfect home.”

Let’s help this sweet girl find a family who can care for her and give her a loving home. For information about Mara and how to adopt her, go to: https://rockykanaka.com/adoption/mara/