On Saturday’s John Mulaney-hosted episode of SNL, Colin Jost and Michael Che did their final “Weekend Update” before the election, and they acknowledged the elephant in the room: all that bottomless dread most if not all of us are feeling about what on earth could happen on and after Tuesday. Maybe Trump will win. Maybe he won’t concede. Maybe his army of lawyers and judges will spend the next weeks, even months battling the results.
But Jost did what he could to plead for sanity in a nation that has gone mad. Jost and Che tend to try to stay detached, to make jokes no matter what, sometimes to even take unpopular stances on certain issues. But that all dropped three minutes into this week’s “Update.”
“What I believe is we cannot do another four years of Trump,” Jost said, of the president who hosted the show around this time back in 2015. “It is too much. Every day I wake up after two hours of sleep and I Google ‘America still democracy?’” He even reached out to Trump’s legions of fans — or at least the ones who can be reasoned with.
“Even if you like Trump, at this point you have to be exhausted. Remember that friend you had who at 4am would be like, ‘Yeah, where we going next?’ And you’re like, ‘This is fun, but if I keep hanging out with this dude I’m going to die. Right now it feels like Trump wants us to do another bump of whatever he got from his Muppet doctor and see where the night takes us. I don’t know about you guys, but I think this time I’m calling a designated driver.”
He then brought up a photo of Trump’s presidential rival, Joe Biden. He added, “And I hope he brings this guy with him,” cutting to the new viral video of his former running mate, President Barack Obama, casually scoring a three-point shot.
Earlier in the segment, Jost had another message for Trump supporters: He’s gotten a lot of them sick and dead. He discussed recent instances in which Trump supporters were left in the lurch after rallies in cold weather, including one in Nebraska that left multiple fans in the hospital with hypothermia. That he’s been claiming, without explanation, that doctors “get more money if somebody dies from COVID,” makes the acts even more appalling.
“That’s our president, recently saved by doctors, saying doctors want more COVID for money,” Jost said. He also brought up a new, horrifying study that directly ties 30,000 cases of the coronavirus and 700 COVID-related deaths to his rallies. “That means he’s officially killed more people across the Midwest than Jeffrey Dahmer and John Wayne Gacy combined.”
You can watch Jost and Che’s comments in the video above. Election Day is on November 3.