Oh Ted Cruz. On one hand, it’s almost admirable that the much maligned senator from Texas can’t stop owning himself on Twitter (it is a kind-of talent, albeit a dubious accomplishment). On the other hand, doesn’t the dude have a job to do? There’s the pandemic response and all the U.S. political upheaval and now a Texas ice storm to navigate, and Cruz’s been busying himself by smarting off over Shakespeare after beefing with Seth Rogen and Cary Elwes and losing both battles. Ted’s latest self-takedown was a doozy, given that he fell for a parody article (from conservative parody site The Babylon Bee) while tweeting, “I wish this was parody.”
He’s the master at self-humiliation, and he keeps coming back for more. Much like the Zodiac Killer, the Cruz just can’t stop. After he noticed how people were laughing at him for falling for an article with such a ridiculous headline (“Disney Posts Job Ad Looking For Strong, Fierce Women Who Are Also Obedient, Submissive, And Docile,” a reference to Gina Carano’s The Mandalorian firing), Ted got defensive and frustrated, so he said something that makes, uh, very little sense:
Why do you have to explain irony to Newsweek? https://t.co/lreN96vTTd
— Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) February 15, 2021
“Why do you have to explain irony to Newsweek?” could mean a lot of things, but it definitely doesn’t communicate that Ted acknowledges that he fell for a parody article. Surprise, surprise, people are firing shots at him over this comeback, too.
Irony that you call yourself senator
— J (@quicken272) February 15, 2021
Is that how you do irony?
Irony: “The expression of one’s meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.”
— Łucky T. (@TheAngryFinn) February 15, 2021
That an Ivy League educated US Senator took satire literally is irony. That he now pretends his mistake is irony is not irony, it is in fact humiliation.
— JPR (@jupiterjpr) February 15, 2021
I knew conservatives like you couldn’t get The Onion’s wit, but Babylonbee was made just for your level of stupidity, and yet you still missed.
— 𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 (@Sundae_Gurl) February 15, 2021
Why do you only selectively bury your head in the sand?
— Esistere (@pseudonymsrule) February 15, 2021
That happens when you lie a lot for a very long period of time.
— Sajjad (@Liberty_7_7) February 15, 2021
The whole state is in distress, millions are without power in Houston alone, and you’re worried about this? What’s going on with ERCOT. Why did 1hr rolling blackouts turn into 8 hours blackouts. I don’t know one person with power right now. We want answers!
— Lisa Wants Ted Cruz Expelled (@MadisonSqG) February 15, 2021
— Kate (@Capt_Hangry) February 15, 2021
Speaking of John Oliver, the Last Week Tonight took a swing at Cruz over his impeachment shenanigans, including meeting with Trump’s lawyers ahead of the trial and assuring them that they’d “already won.” As Oliver put things, “Dead eyes, empty heart. Ted Cruz!” He’s not wrong.
“DEAD EYES, EMPTY HEART, TED CRUZ” — @iamjohnoliver https://t.co/Fqd6RqET1s pic.twitter.com/dAsWS9FYl3
— Matt Wilstein (@mattwilstein) February 15, 2021