Last week, the ever-humble Donald Trump shared a video on Truth Social that claimed God made him to lead the country.
“And on June 14, 1946, God looked down on his planned paradise and said, ‘I need a caretaker.’ So God gave us Trump,” a narrator reads over grainy footage of Trump signing documents and talking to cops. “God said, ‘I need somebody willing to get up before dawn, fix this country, work all day, fight the Marxist, eat supper, then go to the Oval Office and stay past midnight and a meeting of the heads of state.’ So God made Trump.”
Stephen Colbert is willing to buy it (unlike many pastors), but only because “God also made that fish in the Amazon that swims up your pee-hole and shoots out spikes so you can’t get it out,” he said during Monday’s episode of The Late Show. “So, I’m just saying God’s got a mixed record on making things.” He added, “By the way, Donald, have you thought about going swimming in the Amazon?”
They say God created mankind in his own image. So does this mean God is a McDonald’s fanatic who dances like a baby learning to walk? Actually, that makes a lot of sense…
You can watch Colbert’s monologue from The Late Show above.