Category: News

This is the summer of Beyoncé’s Renaissance, an album that has demanded everyone’s attention since it was announced in June and prefaced with the bombastic lead single “Break My Soul.” As fans marvel at the way it brings back house music and prioritizes track sequencing, they’re also starting TikTok trends and challenges based on the LP.

The current Renaissance trend involves the song “Plastic Off The Sofa,” which has intense vocal parts that remind us of why Beyoncé is as much of an icon as she is. The challenge is to try to emulate the “Love On Top” performer’s vocals, requiring lots of vibrato, jumping around the scale, and breath. It’s not easy, but that’s the point, plus it’s a good way to prove yourself if you’re a musician trying to get yourself out there on social media.

Even some celebrities are participating — Chloe Bailey posted an impressive video on Instagram, and somehow she makes it seem effortless.

Find more examples below.

Social media has not only been affected by the album, but it’s been affecting the album itself. Fans called out Beyoncé’s use of an ableist slur, and their voices were so numerous that it has been taken off Renaissance.

It’s hard to imagine that even the most ride-or-die Dr. Oz supporters (do those exist?!) haven’t chuckled just a little bit after seeing one of John Fetterman’s savage takedowns of the former TV quack. As for everyone else? Oh, they’re laughing a lot—even beyond the borders of the state of Pennsylvania, where Dr. Oz only recently set up residence. Stephen Colbert feels you.

On Thursday night’s episode of The Late Show, the host discussed how millions of eyes are on the state of Pennsylvania where the battles for the role of governor and senator are heating up. But what Colbert really wanted to talk about was the senatorial battle between John Fetterman and Dr. Oz—though it could hardly be called a “battle.” According to Colbert:

Polls show Fetterman leading by double-digits, which might be because Pennsylvanians actually want a senator who is actually from Pennsylvania. Dr. Oz lived and voted in New Jersey as recently as the 2020 election. So Fetterman has gone full troll on Oz’s Garden State ass, even starting a petition to add Oz to the New Jersey Hall of Fame. That is lovely.

Colbert also noted that Oz has enlisted the help of several famous New Jersey-ians to help call Oz out as a fraud. Among them? Bruce Springsteen musician and The Sopranos star Steven Van Zandt, who warned Oz that he was out of his league by messing around with Fetterman and that “nobody wants to see you get embarrassed,” to which Colbert quickly raised his hand to make his own point: “I do!”

James Franco hasn’t appeared in a film since 2019, but the actor, who was accused of sexually inappropriate behavior by multiple women (leading to a $2.2 million settlement), is planning his comeback… by portraying Cuban leader Fidel Castro? Huh.

Alina of Cuba follows “Cuban exile turned social advocate” Alina Fernandez (Ana Villafañe), the daughter of Fidel Castro (Franco) and Natalia “Naty” Revuelta (Mía Maestro). John Martinez O’Felan, the project’s lead creative producer, told Deadline that Franco was cast because he had “the closest facial likeness of our Industry’s leading actors, meaning that the focus would be to build out his character accent and we’d have a stunning on-screen match to intrigue audiences and bring the story to life with true visual integrity.”

John Leguizamo thinks this is “f’d up.” In response to the casting announcement, the Encanto star wrote on Instagram, “How is this still going on? How is Hollywood excluding us but stealing our narratives as well? No more appropriation Hollywood and streamers! Boycott! This F’d up!” Leguizamo added that it’s a “seriously difficult story to tell without aggrandizement which would b wrong! I don’t got a prob with Franco but he ain’t Latino!”

If you’re thinking of replying to Leguizamo’s post with, “Franco can’t play Fidel Castro, but it was fine when you played Italian icon, Luigi,” please don’t.

(Via Deadline)

After three decades, The Sandman has finally descended upon streaming devices near you on Netflix. All 10 episodes of the first season are available for the streaming with Tom Sturridge taking on Dream in a lugubrious way, Gwendoline freaking Christie portraying Lucifer, and Patton Oswalt (who came by his devotion honestly) plucking up the voice of Matthew the Raven.

Naturally, author Neil Gaiman headed out to do the publicity rounds. He popped up on Marc Maron’s WTF podcast, where they enjoyed a wide-ranging conversation. Also! Maron’s episode introduction included details of how he has spent “time with The Sandman,” and that time coincided with drug use. The combination led him to believe that both Hellblazer (by Alan Moore) and The Sandman were “journalism,” which… it happens. It was a candid and delightful admission that Gaiman apparently enjoyed.

“I love that you discovered Sandman at a time when you need it,” Neil declared. “And I love that it gave you what you needed at the time that you needed it.” He went on to describe an interaction with a particularly invested Superman fan:

“It matters so much to them. I remember a guy, a comics fan who’s dead now, talking to him once, and he was complaining about John Byrne changing Superman’s origin story. And this is, we’re taking, 30-something years ago now. But he said to me, ‘John Byrne did all the stuff, and and and and and it just destroyed my life.’ And I said to him, ‘Well, why did it destroy your life? Is it because you were the world’s number man Superman expert, and now you’re not? Or what is it?’”

The fan confessed to Neil, “Well, it’s a bit that, but it’s much more. He brought back Superman’s/Clark Kent’s mom and dad, and they’re dead in the comics. And my mom and dad are both dead, and I can’t bring them back.”

As Neil then realized, “And I certainly thought, ‘You’ve been using Superman all your life as a way of holding onto reality and holding onto the world and using it for order, and the fact that you knew all of this stuff was what gave you protection against the world. And now, something fundamental has changed, and it’s hitting you in an incredibly basic way.’” Boom.

Gaiman then declared that this realization gives him “an incredible amount of sympathy for these people who just get over invested an angry and upset” for people who take the continuity of both Iron Man and Superman and the like very seriously. Because their sense of the world grows threatened, and man, that’s profound. Mind you, Neil Gaiman previously let it be known that he gives “zero f*cks” about fans who complain about casting matters, so please don’t go there with Neil Gaiman.

The Sandman is currently streaming on Netflix.

Doja Cat knows how to be the topic of conversation, in and out of music. Her latest action that has the people talking is the decision to shave both her head and eyebrows, the latter occurring in an Instagram Live broadcast yesterday (August 4). While the Planet Her artist simply explains it as her never enjoying having hair and seeing no purpose in keeping it if she won’t wear it out, it seems to be a much deeper issue to some of her fans.

Doja Cat went on to share more of her perspective, specifically as it relates to wearing wigs. “I just can’t believe that it took me this long to be like, ‘Shave your f*cking head.’ Because first of all, I don’t wear my hair out. You guys have seen me wear my natural hair out… I had like two eras. I had like two eras where my hair would be out. I would straighten it. There was a moment where it was natural and then I don’t even wear it natural ’cause I don’t feel like it, and then… it’s just a f*ckin’ nightmare, dude. I’m over it.”

Some fans offered support to the pop star as they feel people will try to turn the situation into a question of Doja’s mental health.

Other fans felt vindicated by the “Juicy” artist’s bravery as they too struggle with their hair.

Ultimately, it is her hair and her choice, but such a seemingly impulsive move is bound to cause a commotion.

Check out the fan reactions to Doja’s new hairstyle above.

After the news that HBO would not be releasing the nearly-done Batgirl movie, many superhero-adjacent directors and producers have been reaching out to directors Adil El Arbi and Bilall Fallah to share their well wishes in wake of the disappointing situation.

Marvel Studios president Kevin Feige sent an email to the directors, which they shared on their Instagram stories, sending love to the duo, who also directed several episodes of Ms. Marvel earlier this year.

Feige, who has produced nearly every Marvel movie since 2007, said, “My friends, I had to reach and let you know we are all thinking about you both. Because of the wonderful news about the wedding (congrats!) and the disappointing news about ‘Batgirl.’ Very proud of you guys and all the amazing work you do and particularly ‘Ms. Marvel’ of course! Can’t wait to see what is next for you. Hope to see you soon.” The email of course ended with “Sent from my iPhone.”

In addition to Feige reaching out, the directors also received support from Edgar Wright and Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn. Arbi added on Instagram: “Thanks for all the messages of support all over the world. Shoutout directors Edgar Wright and James Gunn, your kind words and experience mean a lot and help us through this difficult period.”

The $90 million superhero movie with an all-star cast included In The Heights’ Leslie Rose, fan-favorite Brendon Fraser, DC veteran JK Simmons, and the long-awaited return of Michale Keaton as Batman. The movie was axed by HBO Max due to poor test screenings and financial distress, though it was revealed that HBO and Discovery Plus would be joining forces as on streaming service next year, and it’s likely that Batgirl was just caught in the crossfire.

Fans on social media have been asking for HBO to release the film anyway (a la The Snyder Cut), though there have been no updates thus far.

(Via Variety)

Hey, the Premier League’s back. After about two and half months worth of a break, the English top flight is slated to return this weekend, starting with a game on Friday afternoon between Crystal Palace and Arsenal — for folks watching in the U.S., the game kicks at 3 p.m. ET on USA Network. That begets a weekend packed with games. Behold:

Peacock: It’s like cable, but you pay extra for it! Anyway, this season should be a blast for a number of reasons, and ahead of things kicking off, we wanted to answer the five biggest questions facing the league this year and make some predictions about how things will go down.

1. How does the World Cup impact the entire season?

I suppose this is less of a Premier League thing and more of a general thing, but regardless: All 20 Premier League teams will play a game on Saturday, Nov. 12. Then, competitive games are gonna stop for a month-plus while dozens of players head to Qatar for the World Cup (the tournament runs from Nov. 21 until Dec. 18). Players will then return, and all 20 teams will play a game on Boxing Day, Dec. 26. It’s an extremely unique situation, one that will make the already challenging task of navigating a season a little more difficult — players are going to leave their teams and play hundreds of high-intensity minutes in sweltering heat in the middle of the season, without much time to prepare for their national team responsibilities before the World Cup starts and, if their team goes on a run in the knockout round, barely any time to rest and recover before the Premier League campaign starts up again.

Some high-profile players whose national teams did not qualify for Qatar, like Liverpool’s Mo Salah and Manchester City’s Erling Haaland, will get a month off to rest and recover (and in the case of a new signing like Haaland, work on things that help them get a better grasp of their new club situation). But for numerous others, there’s a big risk that comes with going to the World Cup. The “what if?” game is a dangerous one, but plenty of teams are one rolled ankle to the wrong player away from their chances of making a European competition or staving off relegation taking a gigantic hit. Here’s to hoping everyone who heads to Qatar can avoid those sorts of injuries and they’re able to get through the season without hitting a wall.

2. Can anyone else get in on the title race or are Manchester City and Liverpool a step above everyone again?

The last team not named Manchester City or Liverpool to win the Premier League was Chelsea in 2017. City have won the league four times since then, Liverpool won it once. The year Liverpool won, City were the runners-up. In two of the four years City won, Liverpool were runners-up, both times by a single point. That included last year, when City barely got across the finish line on the final day and secured the title with 93 points to Liverpool’s 92.

The teams in third and fourth place last season, Chelsea and Tottenham, finished on 74 and 71 points, respectively. A gap exists between the top-2 teams in the league and everyone else, as City and Liverpool have arguably the two best managers in the world, the two best squads in the world, and a whole lot of trophies to back all of that up. And this summer, both sides brought in potentially game-changing talent all over the park: City still need a left back, but got Haaland from Borussia Dortmund, midfielder Kalvin Phillips from Leeds, and forward Julián Álvarez from River Plate; Liverpool purchased striker Darwin Núñez from Benfica, forward Fábio Carvalho from Fulham, and right back Calvin Ramsay from Aberdeen.

Despite this, both teams also lost important players, while a number of the teams below them secured major reinforcements. City sold forward Raheem Sterling to Chelsea and the duo of Gabriel Jesus (a forward) and Oleksandr Zinchenko (a left back/midfielder) to Arsenal; Liverpool sold star forward Sadio Mane to Bayern Munich. Beyond Sterling, Chelsea added Napoli center back Kalidou Koulibaly, Brighton defender Marc Cucurella, and seem to get linked to another big-money move every day or two. Arsenal added Porto midfielder Fábio Vieira to their midfield. Tottenham had a monster summer, as it brought forward Richarlison over from Everton, midfielder Yves Bissouma in from Brighton, right back Djed Spence in from Middlesbrough, and midfielder/wingback Ivan Perisic from Inter Milan.

Tottenham seems, to me, the most dangerous of the bunch, as their attacking trio of Son Heung-Min, Harry Kane, and January acquisition Dejan Kulusevski caused teams major problems last year — Son and Kane might be the best players at their respective positions in the world — and Bissouma is going to make their already steely midfield awfully hard to play through. Plus their manager, Antonio Conte, is as good as any manager in world football. Spurs have not won a trophy since 2007-08, when they won the League Cup. I’m fascinated in whether or not Conte, who loves racking up trophies, decides to make a run at a trophy in one of the three cup competitions Spurs find themselves (League Cup, FA Cup, or Champions League, which would easily be the toughest of the bunch), but if they go for broke in the league, they’re going to be a thorn in City and Liverpool’s side.

Still, while the caveat of the World Cup looms over all of this (City, in particular, are susceptible to something happening at the tournament as they might send 14 first-team players to Qatar), breaking up the stranglehold the top-2 have on the league is a mighty difficult task. Impossible? Probably not, but City and Liverpool are that good. At the bare minimum, the two times they’re guaranteed to play this year — Oct. 16 at Anfield and April 1 in Manchester — are going to be two of the best games of the season. Any chance to watch guys like Kevin de Bruyne, or Virgil van Dijk, or Phil Foden, or Trent Alexander-Arnold, or João Cancelo, or Luis Díaz, or Haaland, or Salah, or any of the other world-class players both of these teams boast is a joy, but there is something so special about when they step on the pitch against one another and everyone seems to elevate their games to match the magnitude of the occasion.

Giving away how this piece ends: My hunch is Liverpool’s deeper squad mixed with the fact that City are likely sending so many players to the World Cup (and thereby increasing the likelihood of either an injury or sheer exhaustion catching up to them) means I’m inclined to lean towards red ribbons being placed on the Premier League trophy at the end of the year. Betting against City is usually a terrible idea, though, and if Haaland can hit the ground running during his first year in England, this prediction might end up looking terrible.

3. What the heck is up with Cristiano Ronaldo (and Manchester United as a whole)?

The above section featured five of the Big Six sides in English football. The one exception is Manchester United, which have had a … well let’s call it an interesting summer.

At the forefront: Cristiano Ronaldo, one of the sport’s icons and a club legend who re-joined the team from Juventus last year after originally leaving in 2009, really doesn’t seem like he wants to be there anymore. The long and the short of it is Ronaldo, who turns 38 in February, wants to win as many things as he possibly can and compete in the Champions League at this stage of his career. United probably aren’t doing the former (last season was his first since 2010 in which he did not win a single trophy) and are not part of the latter this year.

As such, he wants out, but the situation as of this writing is that no one seems to want him, either because they can’t afford him or his style of play doesn’t quite fit — at this point in his career, Ronaldo basically doesn’t run unless he is trying to score a goal, and everything he does on the pitch is with the intention of scoring a goal. There’s value in this, but for a player who costs what Ronaldo costs (a little more than £515,000 a week, the highest figure in England) and demands what Ronaldo demands in terms of playing time, well, it’s a tougher pill to swallow.

All of this is happening in a summer of gigantic overhaul at perhaps the biggest club in England. There’s a new manager, Erik ten Hag, who is trying to clean up the mess that led to them finishing sixth last year and has prevented them from winning the league since 2012-13. Their top target this summer, Barcelona midfielder Frenkie de Jong (who played and thrived under ten Hag at Ajax), doesn’t want to leave. While United probably haven’t done nearly enough in the transfer market to suddenly become title contenders, they have brought in talented players and let a number of guys who just have not worked out either leave or go on loan.

Still, the Ronaldo situation looms over everything, and his style of play doesn’t exactly mesh with what ten Hag (who wants his team to press without the ball and play with fluidity in the attacking third). The transfer window closes on Sept. 1, so there is still time to sort this out, but regardless: A club that has lacked patience in recent years might need to give ten Hag time to build the team in his image, and that includes figuring out what the heck to do with Ronaldo.

4. Can someone steal a European spot from one of the Big Six sides?

The Big Six have the inside track to the six main European spots — four in the Champions League, two in the Europa League — but of course, having the inside track hardly means something is guaranteed. Anything is possible and I am an idiot, but here are three teams that, in my opinion, could have a shot to swipe one. (Also, there is technically a final European tournament in the Europa Conference League, but it’s brand new and lacks the prestige of the other two.)

West Ham: The Hammers got seventh last year, finishing two points behind United in sixth. They’re an excellent side with a manager in David Moyes who just knows how to get results, and perhaps most importantly, they didn’t lose anyone who gave them double-digit starts and more than 1,000 minutes in the league last year. They also spent over $100 million in the transfer window, led by gigantic Italian striker Gianluca Scamacca and Moroccan defender Nayef Aguerd. Their midfield duo of Declan Rice and Tomáš Souček are among the best in the league, and Jarrod Bowen is a tricky and talented winger. They are going to be very, very good.

Crystal Palace: Former Arsenal star Patrick Vieira has done an impressive job since taking over last year — the team finished in 12th in 2021-22. Under his guidance, Palace are a nightmare to play through and are far more confident playing with the ball, younger, and physically imposing than they have been in years past. While standout midfielder Conor Gallagher’s loan spell is up and he’s back at Chelsea now, they’re still going to be a very direct side that wants to battle in the midfield and create chances that Wilfried Zaha can finish. Bringing in midfielder Cheick Doucouré from French side Lens was one of the signings of the summer, and for the Americans reading this, new center back signing Chris Richards teams up with fellow center back Marc Guéhi and left back Tyrick Mitchell for one of the league’s most promising defensive groupings.

Newcastle United: Newcastle looked destined to get relegated last year before new manager Eddie Howe came in and the club’s new ownership group, Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund, spent money in the January transfer window to save them from the Championship and finish 11th. Those players now have a year under Howe, while their summer signings (defenders Sven Botman and Matt Targett, goalkeeper Nick Pope) should shore up a defense that allowed the sixth-most goals in the league last year. If that happens and they can find someone who consistently finishes chances and scores double-figure goals, Newcastle is going to give opposing teams headaches.

5. Will the fight for relegation be interesting or are we headed towards the three new teams heading back down?

A usually pretty safe bet is that a few of the teams that just got promoted will head back down to the Championship. This year, Bournemouth, Fulham, and Nottingham Forest are all in the Prem, with Bournemouth the overwhelming favorites in the league to head back down — as of this writing, the Cherries are -250 to get relegated, as the team has barely done any business this summer upon returning to the Premier League for the first time since 2019-20. Fulham and Forest are both +125 to return to the Championship. The former won their league last year and have a striker in Aleksandar Mitrović who scored a record 43 goals, but are masters of returning to the Prem and immediately going back down. The latter have done a ton of business this summer, although time will tell how that works out.

As for teams that were in the league last year, Leeds United (+225) have the best odds at going down, while Brentford (+240), Southampton (+275), Everton (+333), and Wolverhampton Wanderers (+400) are all viewed by bookmakers as teams with a shout. Leeds avoided relegation on the final day last year, Everton did so in their penultimate game. Both lost crucial players in the summer (Leeds sold Kalvin Phillips to Manchester City and Raphina to Barcelona, Everton sold Richarlison to Tottenham), while the former did a ton of business in an attempt to replace those guys and the latter … well, not really, but they got a pair of players from Burnley (James Tarkowski and Dwight McNeil) who should help them.

Maybe Brentford losing Christian Eriksen is too much to overcome, or Wolves are in trouble if standout keeper José Sá doesn’t stand on his head again, but he team that interests me the most here is Southampton. They’ve been in the Prem since 2012 but things feel like they’re starting to grow really stale under manager Ralph Hasenhüttl, who wants his team to press and play aggressively. It’s led to them getting thrashed a few times a year. They brought in a number of young, talented players, but we’ll see if that bet pays off.

Manchester City and Liverpool are both +450000 to get relegated. I will confidently say neither are getting relegated. If nothing else in this post, I will get that right. Anyway, here are some other predictions to close this out:

Winners: Liverpool
Champions League: Manchester City, Tottenham, Chelsea
Europa League: Arsenal, West Ham
Relegation: Bournemouth, Fulham, Southampton
Player of the Season: Mo Salah, Liverpool
Young Player of the Season: Erling Haaland, Manchester City
Manager of the Season: Antonio Conte, Tottenham
Golden Boot: Mo Salah, Liverpool
Golden Glove: Alisson, Liverpool

The social media team for The Boys is clearly not wasting an opportunity to roast the HBO Max fiasco at the newly-formed Warner Bros. Discovery. During its earnings call this week, WBD confirmed its oddly-gendered plan to merge HBO Max and Discovery+ into a giant super-app next summer. Considering The Boys has heavily satirized the look and feel of Warner’s DC Extended Universe — along with notable jabs at Marvel, of course — it’s perfectly fitting for the Amazon series to have a little fun with the recent corporate shenanigans.

Using the Twitter account for Vought International, the massive entertainment and pharmaceutical conglomerate responsible for the “Supes” on the show, the social media team released a satirical announcement for you, you guessed it, a new super app that takes a very notable dig at Discovery’s stable of reality television. It also didn’t miss a chance to dunk on WBD’s weird proclamation that HBO Max is for boys and Discovery+ is for girls, which still has people scratching their heads.

Vought is bringing your streaming together in one, fairly easy-to-use app. VTV+, VNN+ and VSN+ are now part of Vought++! It’s plus-plus, for only an additional $29.99 per month. Rewatch Dawn of the Seven with the guys, dive in to Property Flippers with the gals, plus more!

Oddly, The Boys social media team didn’t get in a good jab at WBD shelving Batgirl for a tax write-off, but the show is hard at work on Season 4, so don’t be surprised to see a gag (or two) pop up when the Amazon series returns.

(Via Vought International on Twitter)

Bullet Train feels a bit like Murder On The Orient Express as directed by Guy Ritchie’s cousin. It’s a classic example of a movie with a lot of flair and panache (not to mention an expensive cast) with seemingly no real heart or story to attach it to, so it ends up being this sort of nest of tinsel and free-floating baubles. Initially eye catching, but less interesting the longer you stare at it.

Bullet Train is an action movie set on a train speeding through Japan. Brad Pitt, whom director David Leitch used to stunt double for, plays the main character, of sorts. We meet him as he’s in the midst of an irreverent phone conversation with his faceless handler over his new codename: Ladybug. Why Ladybug? Something about how ladybugs are lucky.

Now, it always strikes me as a bad sign when a movie announces early on that “luck” is going to be a major theme of the story. I don’t have much emotional attachment to the concept of “luck,” and it always feels more like a screenwriter pre-excusing themselves for a dumb thing that’s going to happen later. Don’t blame me! The protagonist is just lucky! Didn’t I tell you that’s his whole thing?

Pitt’s character, it turns out, has been hired to grab a briefcase. That briefcase turns out to be full of ransom money, which is being guarded (not very well, mind you) by two other shadowy operatives, codenamed Lemon and Tangerine, played by Brian Tyree Henry and Aaron Taylor-Johnson, respectively. We also meet them in the midst of an argument about their codenames. “Lemon, you mean like the fruit?” “Yeah, it’s sophisticated.”

Like virtually every other dialogue scene in Bullet Train, the exchange isn’t funny, per se, but it’s delivered in the rough shape and syntax of a joke-like thing (also, of course like the fruit, what the hell else would “lemon” and “tangerine” refer to?). I have nothing against verbose, irreverent dialogue in action movies, which has worked well in plenty of them for generations, from Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid through Tarantino and Guy Ritchie and even to a certain degree in Leitch’s 2018 effort, Deadpool 2.

It’s not the tone that’s the issue in Bullet Train, it’s that there’s only tone. Its characters exist almost entirely as tone-delivery systems, and that tone doesn’t differ much from character to character. Brian Tyree Henry’s Lemon talks about Thomas the Tank Engine a lot and Brad Pitt’s Ladybug is on some sort of self-help trip, but for the most part they’re all exactly the same level, cadence, and flavor of smart-alecky. Which makes them feel more like a series of sock puppets than separate humans. Or maybe that’s just me overthinking the basic fact that the majority of Bullet Train‘s jokes just don’t really land. At best you want to give them credit for trying so hard.

Bullet Train‘s characters don’t have motivations so much as jobs and titles. Ladybug has to get the briefcase for his boss (unnamed), which Lemon and Tangerine don’t want because they need it to appease their boss — a mysterious Russian leader of the Yakuza known as The White Death. Who is the White Death? Don’t worry, there will be a lengthy, stylized flashback to explain that one. What Bullet Train lacks in characters it tries to make up for in LORE.

Leitch co-directed John Wick, but Bullet Train feels more like John Wick 2, when, tasked with trying to recreate a rather straightforward revenge movie, Chad Stehelski and screenwriter Derek Kolstad went miles deep into previously unexplored John Wick lore. That was understandable and probably borne out of necessity, but the trouble with Bullet Train is that it spends so much time on lore and backstory that there’s barely any room for the actual story. How many minutes of screen time did we need to spend on characters arguing about their own names?

Sure, the characters fight a lot (it is an action movie directed by a stunt guy, after all), and the fight work is consistently above average and sporadically funny, but they spend so much time talking about why they’re fighting, and whether they should fight that Bullet Train often times feels more like a yak-fest than an action movie. And screenwriter Zak Olkewicz (adapting from a book by Kôtarô Isaka) does not have Tarantino or even Guy Ritchie’s flair for banter, though he sure seems to like Thomas the Tank Engine a lot. Which isn’t necessarily interesting, but is certainly a choice.

Bullet Train‘s biggest innovation, which it uses over and over again, is to throw major stars at minor roles revealed late in the film. Almost like they’re doing the Marvel thing without the comic book IP. Instead of the audience saying, “Hey, look, it’s Bucky Barnes!” they can say “Hey look, it’s [FAMOUS ACTOR WHOSE APPEARANCE NOW CONSTITUTES A SPOILER]!”

In either case, it’s an attempt to substitute the joy of actually being invested in a story with the joy of recognizing a thing you know from somewhere else. Par for the course for Bullet Train, which is more a collection of things than a thing in its own right.

‘Bullet Train’ hits theaters August 5th. Vince Mancini is on Twitter. You can access his archive of reviews here.

The Buffalo Bills made a major splash this offseason when they went out and acquired former All-Pro defensive lineman Von Miller. With the team’s path to a Super Bowl including quarterbacks like Patrick Mahomes, Justin Herbert, and Joe Burrow, the Bills decided they needed to bolster their pass rush, and there was no better example of that than by trading for Miller from the Los Angeles Rams and subsequently giving him a 6-year deal worth up to $120 million.

In addition to his prowess as a pass rusher, Miller is one of the league’s more unique personalities, which makes him a fun match with Bills fans, who are known for being … well, let’s call them a little different, but in a really good way. An example of this came when Miller recently said the quality of toilet paper in the team’s dormitories during training camp wasn’t up to part. And then…

“The people of Buffalo, the people of Rochester, and Bills fans in general are great,” Miller said. “I remember the last time I was up here, I said something about the toilet paper, and four days later, I got all types of toilet paper, just in the mail, and wipes, and plant-free wipes from all types of fans. I just put ’em in the locker room, it was great.”

Miller went on to say he’s gotten “boxes on boxes on boxes” of toilet paper and wipes from Bills fans. Congratulations to every player on Buffalo’s roster on the development.