Category: News

Dune is kind of a lot if you’re not someone who is already familiar with Dune or likes space things, in general. I say this without judgment. It’s fine and maybe even good. But it is just, like, a lot, objectively, starting with the space drugs that let you see the future and power your spaceships and moving to the thing where there are massive space worms that live underground in the desert and can swallow spaceships whole. Again, a lot. And even more so if you’re not someone with a brain wired toward science fiction. But, thankfully, between and around and during all of that, there is also a dude named Duncan Idaho who is played by Jason Momoa and wrecks people with swords even though the movie takes place way in the future. That was helpful to me.

Or take Aquaman. Aquaman is a movie I’ve seen straight through twice and parts of many times, and also a movie I remember exactly two things about: One, at one point, for reasons that are never exactly clear and do not need to be, an octopus plays the drums; two, Jason Momoa looks cool as hell standing under a waterfall with a trident in his hand. I do not care very much about Aquaman, in general. I do not think I would have watched more than five minutes of any Aquaman movie if Aquaman had been played by, like, Jeremy Renner. But if I’m clicking around tonight and see Jason Momoa holding that trident, I mean… I might stick around. Again. At least until I see the octopus play the drums. Look at this guy.

What is the takeaway here? There are probably two, as far as I can tell. The first is that I am kind of an idiot, especially when it comes to space and/or science things. I know that. I can admit that. But it brings us to the second thing: if you are making a movie, any movie, really, but definitely one with a complicated backstory or history, you should just put Jason Momoa in the movie. Maybe give him a knife or a sword or, if you can make it work with your story, a trident. The movie will probably be better for it.

This is one of those things I feel like we all already knew on some deeper level below our consciousness, but it was driven home for me by this tweet.

It’s true, from beginning to end. He plays rad dudes exclusively, and every movie can use another rad dude. There’s no one else out there doing this exact thing he’s doing, either. He’s carved out this cool little Rad Dude niche for himself, right on the line between Very Intense and Very Chill. It’s fascinating to me. Jason Momoa is kind of like a cross between “What if Keanu Reeves was freakin’ jacked?” and “What if The Rock took edibles?” and it all ends up working somehow. I am so happy for him, but I am also happy for the rest of us, too.

But let’s look at some examples. Let’s look at some of our bigger movie franchises and try to see if Jason Momoa would fit into them, just to see if this theory tracks.

The Fast & Furious Franchise — I think the biggest surprise here is that Jason Momoa has not already appeared in the Fast & Furious franchise. I would tell you to close your eyes and picture it but you can do this one with your peepers open wide. I’m picturing him in a dark office behind a large wooden desk, his fingers pressed together into a little tent, explaining to Dominic Toretto that he had to hold the world’s entire NoS supply hostage for Reasons related to How Things Really Are, followed by an extended scene where they have a sword fight in a hurricane, followed much later — possibly in the next film — by them grilling burgers together at a barbecue and referring to each other as “brother.”

The John Wick Franchise — Jason Momoa as a legendary assassin who works for the High Table and is sent to kill John Wick once and for all, but they realize they are Not So Different After All and decide to team up and in the final scene both of them heave tridents like javelins directly into the hearts of two evil High Table members both played by, oh, let’s say Tilda Swinton. I would sacrifice three months off the end of my life to see this movie.

The Paddington Franchise — Here’s what I’ve got so far: Paddington is in trouble, again, but this time it’s because he’s accidentally crossed an ancient organization that is sending squadrons of goons after him and his only hope is one renegade named like Tex Montecarlo (Jason Momoa) who goes everywhere with two swords crisscrossed across his back and kind of a lot of eye makeup on, which is a detail I add mostly so I can remind you that Key & Peele once referred to Momoa’s character on Game of Thrones, warlord Khal Drogo, as “Big Dave Navarro.”

The Magic Mike Franchise — Jason Momoa and Joe Manganiello doing a choreographed performance while wearing fur and holding real axes for some reason, all set to “Warrior” by Pat Benatar, and done at a secret meeting of crooked female billionaires — led by… let’s just go with Tilda Swinton again — that Channing Tatum is stealing jewels from while those two distract the women with hip thrusts, because let’s just go ahead and make these heist movies now.

(There’s an added bonus here to putting Jason Momoa in the movies, beyond just having Jason Momoa do cool Momoa things on the screen. Any time Jason Momoa is in a movie, it gives you — okay, me — another excuse to remind people that he’s married to Lisa Bonet, who used to be married to Lenny Kravitz, whose mom was Roxie Roker from The Jeffersons, whose cousin is television meteorologist Al Roker, which means Lenny Kravitz and Al Roker are actually second cousins. This might be my favorite fact ever. I like having excuses to bring it up. A reasonable argument can be made that it is the main reason I wrote this article.)

Do you see? Do you see what I mean? All of those movies would be incredible. I could have kept going, too, easily. In fact, I will. Jason Momoa in Mission: Impossible as a fellow spy who frees Tom Cruise from a jungle prison by whipping most of a tree at someone. Jason Momoa in Jurassic Park fighting a triceratops with his bare hands. Jason Momoa in a Harry Potter movie as a cool teacher at Hogwarts named Professor Smirkus Biceps who rides a flying motorcycle around town. Every one of these characters is basically the same person and they would instantly become my favorite character in each franchise. I repeat: Just put Jason Momoa in the movie.

It doesn’t even need to be a franchise. It could be a one-off based loosely on current events (Jason Momoa playing a former Green Beret turned first-term senator who must defend Congress against an insurrection), or a 90s-style submarine movie (Jason Momoa carrying around torpedoes all casually, one in each hand like they’re Thermoses), or even an indie romance movie (Jason Momoa playing a bad boy with a heart of gold who seduces a widowed English professor and shows her that there’s still excitement and fun left in the world and she’s played by, you guessed it, Tilda Swinton). Listen to me: Put Jason Momoa in the movie.

Put Jason Momoa in the movie.

Do not think too hard about this.

It’s so simple.

Write the movie.

Put a character in the movie who is a rad dude who has a knife or a sword or a trident or a motorcycle.

Call Jason Momoa.

Ask him to be in the movie.

And then put Jason Momoa in the movie.

Ted Cruz redeemed himself for about half a second a month ago (while making an “evil” joke about the Zodiac Killer), but it was too good to last. The Texas lawmaker and Cancun superfan went back to the same ways that recently prompted one of the nicest guys in the world, Patton Oswalt, to publicly call him out, and that’s precisely what Ted does to people. So, it shouldn’t be a real surprise that Cruz stood up for one’s right to give Nazi salutes during school board meetings, although still, whoa, this guy is an elected U.S. official.

The topic arose as Ted and his GOP colleagues, during a Senate Judiciary Committee meeting, attempted to argue that reports of school-board meeting implosions are greatly exaggerated. The subject’s clearly a heated one to even bring up in the Senate, just like it is in real life, and Attorney General Merrick Garland was on hand to defend his memo, which suggested that federal resources might be warranted to address the issue. After all, one need only witness the montage videos — many of which include Matt Baker, a dreadlocked California right-winger, shouting at the San Diego Board of Supervisors about Nazis and how “your children and your children’s children will be subjugated” — to know that MAGAs are really losing it over masks and vaccines. Well, Ted is here to defend people doing Nazi salutes at these meetings. Yep, he truly did this.

“During this hearing, I counted 20 incidents cited. Of the 20, 15 on their face are non-violent,” Ted began. “They involve things like insults, they involve a Nazi salute. That’s one of the examples. My God! A parent did a Nazi salute at a school board because he thought that the policies were oppressive.”

Cruz was really going in on Garland during this meeting, and he turned to him and asked, “General Garland, is doing a Nazi salute at an elected official, is that protected by the First Amendment?”

Garland responded, “Yes, it is.” It’s worth noting that Ted also tried to box Garland in by trying to rope him into a completely unrelated ethical question on critical race theory.

The point here is this: Ted’s an unhinged man on a MAGA mission, Nazi salutes are plain awful, and people are disgusted with Ted standing up for the gesture. After all, his selective defense of “free speech” evaporated when Colin Kaepernick took a knee during the National Anthem.

And one chose to keep it simple.

As the investigation into the accidental shooting death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins on the set of Rust continues, authorities have confirmed earlier reports that the gun fired by Alec Baldwin did contain a live bullet. In a press conference on Wednesday, Santa Fe County Sheriff Adam Mendoza revealed the ballistic findings concluded that a lead projectile was fired from the gun and was recovered from the shoulder of director Joel Souza, who was wounded by the same bullet that killed Hutchins.

Mendoza also chastised filmmakers for the lack of safety protocols on the Rust set, which have also been frequently reported since the shooting took place. Via Reuters:

Asked about the use of real weapons on a movie set, the sheriff said, “I think the industry has had a record recently of being safe. I think there was some complacency on this set. And I think there are some safety issues that need to be addressed by the industry and possibly by the state of New Mexico.”

As for possible charges, Deadline reports that the sheriff’s office is not ruling out anyone “at this point.” However, they say, it is still too early in the investigation to comment on that aspect of the story.

“The investigation will continue and if the Sheriff’s Office determines during our investigation that a crime has occurred and probable cause exists, an arrest or arrests will be made and charges will be filed,” Mendoza said.

While Mendoza’s comments sound ominous, legal experts believe Baldwin is the least likely to be charged despite being the one to fire the gun. Armorer Hannah Reed-Gutierrez and Assistant Director David Halls are in a more precarious situation as they were both responsible for firearm safety on set. However, Mendoza said in his comments on Wednesday that Reed-Gutierrez and Halls have been fully cooperating with the investigation, as has Baldwin.

(Via Reuters, Deadline)

UPROXX Sessions is back with another new performance from an up-and-coming underground star. Chxpo, a Cleveland, Ohio native with ties to the wider SoundCloud thrash-rap movement of 2016 (think SpaceGhostpurpp, Wifisfuneral, Ski Mask The Slump God, and Matt Ox), drops in with an aggressive performance of his new song “All My Opps Dead” from his April 2021 album, Xyber Punk 009.

The punk influences in his music are obvious and his aesthetic leans heavily into the anime-inspired looks that also adorn his peers, so Chxpo may throw off some rap purists. With song titles like “Howls Moving Castle” and “Red Ribbon Army” all over his latest project, though, fans who grew up watching Toonami and Adult Swim will likely find plenty to love. On “All My Opps Dead,” Chxpo employs a scream-rap style reminiscent of Tekashi 69, which should endear him to fans of high-energy, menacing mosh pit rap.

Watch Chxpo perform “All My Opps Dead” above.

UPROXX Sessions is Uproxx’s performance show featuring the hottest up-and-coming acts you should keep an eye on. Featuring creative direction from LA promotion collective, Ham On Everything, and taking place on our “bathroom” set designed and painted by Julian Gross, UPROXX Sessions is a showcase of some of our favorite performers, who just might soon be yours, too.

We’re just about a couple weeks removed from the release of Finneas’ debut solo album, Optimist, an album that has so far produced a pair of singles: “What They’ll Say About Us” and “A Concert Six Months From Now.” He performed on The Late Late Show yesterday, but instead of one of those singles, he chose to highlight album cut “Love Is Pain.”

He kept the performance understated, as it was just him singing the reflective song as he played it on piano. The stage design was similarly minimal but striking, as light dramatically emanated from holes in his piano.

Finneas previously told Apple Music’s Zane Lowe of his new album, “When I listen to it back now, I was writing a very interpersonal introspective album, and I think that’s what a year of sitting at home and thinking will do to you. […] When I listen to this album of mine I’m like, ‘Oh yeah, this is how I was feeling and this is how I’ve felt my whole life about certain things,’ and for that reason I’m very proud of this record and I feel very comfortable with it. I think sometimes when stuff is finished and sits on a shelf for a while, you look up at it and you’re like, ‘I don’t know how well that’s aging.’ I think this album is honest enough that it doesn’t really matter how it ages because it’s how I feel.”

Watch Finneas perform “Love Is Pain” above.

This summer, a Twitter user went after Jason Isbell with an attempted insult about his level of fame, but Isbell embraced it, replying, “B list is the best list, though. I can go to the grocery store without being bothered, and I afford the good eggs.” Indeed, Isbell is in a position where he’s not a household name to all but has plenty of fans who enjoy and respect his work. It turns out even those folks don’t always recognize him, though.

Yesterday, Isbell shared a story about a peculiar encounter with somebody who appeared to be a fan of his, tweeting, “I just rode an elevator with a guy in a Jason Isbell t-shirt and I said nice shirt and he just said thank you. So either I’m looking not so good today or that’s one cool ass dude. Or maybe the shirt was a gift and it’s laundry day and he’s not a fan at all.”

Isbell’s post prompted some other similar stories of famous people not being recognized. Variety‘s Chris Willman shared a tremendous Dave Matthews story, writing, “I once interviewed Dave Matthews in a park. A young couple asked if we’d help them move furniture. We did and spent a nice half-hour hanging out at their new house. I got their number and later called to ask if they’d heard of Dave Matthews. ‘Yeah, we just went to his show. Why?’” Isbell responded, “I’m honestly not surprised by this one.”

Isbell re-shared another story he called “so magical,” from a Twitter user who wrote, “I once invited David Lee Roth camping/rock climbing and he said yes AND CAME because he was so tickled that I didn’t know who he was IRL despite being an avid MTV teen in his Van Halen years. It happens.” The person later elaborated, “I met Dave at Rat Rock in Central Park. We were both bouldering & struck up a convo & I said my friends & I go climbing in the Gunks every wknd, would he like to come? He said yes, we exchanged # s, he left. […] Dave showed up with his bodyguard/belayer, a ton of food, drink (& other things) A great time was had by all. He said he came bc it was clear I had no idea who he was & we seemed like a fun group.”

A follower also introduced Isbell to a classic viral clip of a street musician singing Matisyahu’s “One Day” while Matisyahu himself watched, unbeknownst to the musician (Matisyahu changed his signature look in 2011).

While Avengers star Jeremy Renner managed to maintain his rule-abiding and theft-free reputation on-set for quite some time, much like the character he portrays, he’s now proving he’s got a bit of a rebellious streak in ‘em. In a recent appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, the Hawkeye star confessed he has officially taken home his first item from set: his Hawkeye suit.

Of course, Renner was quick to defend his actions, explaining the harmless situation that led to him obtaining the suit, as well as pointing out his co-star’s penchants for taking prop items home with them:

“Over the decade or so of doing ‘The Avengers’ and stuff, I never took anything, because they asked us not to and my mom taught me well, so I never took anything, right? And then all the other Avengers took stuff! Those dirtbags, they stole something! Like, Thor’s got his hammer!”

Kimmel then laughed and doubled-down on what Renner was saying, telling the star he’s seen numerous “Mjölnirs lying around” Chris Hemsworth’s home. However, ever the on-set good guy, Renner says he didn’t straight up take the suit like his fellow superhero squad members might have. Instead, Renner explained the volunteer system at his daughter’s school to the studio, expressed interest in wearing his superhero get-up during his turn to help out, and then simply asked the studio if he could borrow it. The studio then allowed him to take home his costume from his upcoming Disney+ series, and so far, hasn’t asked for it back. Though even if they do, Renner admits he most likely won’t be returning it.

“I don’t know if they’re going to ask for it back, I probably won’t give it back at this point. But I got it finally.”

According to Renner, he still hasn’t gotten the chance to wear the costume yet. He then proceeded to joke that even when he does, he doesn’t expect his young daughter to be very impressed with his outfit, telling Kimmel “she barely knows I’m Hawkeye” and will probably accuse him of wearing pajamas.

You can catch Renner in his pajamas — er, super suit — when the Hawkeye series premieres over on Disney+ on November 24. Set after the events of Avengers: Endgame, in addition to Renner the show stars MCU newcomer Hailee Steinfeld and Black Widow’s Florence Pugh.

An old George Carlin interview has resurfaced in the wake of Dave Chappelle complaining about being canceled (while performing in front of a packed audience) following the backlash to his Netflix special, The Closer. The clip is from 1990, when the legendary comedian appeared on Larry King’s show to discuss Andrew Dice Clay’s sexist and homophobic jokes.

“I would defend to the death his right to do everything he does,” Carlin admitted. But “the thing that I find unusual, and it’s, you know, not a criticism so much, but his targets are underdog[s]. And comedy traditionally has picked on people in power, people who abuse their power. Women and gays and immigrants are kind of, to my way of thinking, underdog[s]. And, you know, he ought to be careful, because he’s Jewish. And a lot of people who want to pick on these kind of groups, the Jews are on that list. A little further you’ve got women, gays, gypsies and boom, boom, boom, and suddenly you find the Jews.” King asked why Dice Clay was able to “get away” with these offensive jokes that target marginalized communities, to which Carlin replied:

“I think his core audience are young, white males who are threatened by these groups. I think a lot of these guys aren’t sure of their manhood, because that’s a problem when you’re going through adolescence. You know, ‘Am I really, could I be, I hope I’m not one of them.’ And the women who assert themselves and are competent are a threat to these men, and so are immigrants in terms of jobs.”

Thirty-plus years later, Carlin’s wise words are still worth hearing:

This year, Kidz Bop celebrated its 20th anniversary, meaning they’ve been making family-friend covers of the most popular pop songs for two decades. They’ve tried hard to spin some raunchy lyrics into kid-friendly verses over the years, like when changed Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda” to actually be about snakes. But their recent version of Lil Nas X‘s Montero title track perhaps takes the cake for being the most laughable.

The Kidz Bop team got wildly creative when switching up the lyrics to “Montero (Call Me By Your Name).” Of course, they couldn’t have 10-year-olds singing Lil Nas X’s lyrics about cocaine and f*cking people out of his league, so they instead swapped out many of the lines.

One of Lil Nas X’s “Montero” lyrics reads, “I wanna sell what you’re buying / I wanna feel on yo’ ass in Hawaii / I want that jet lag from f*cking and flying / Shoot a child in your mouth while I’m riding.” But Kidz Bop’s version is much different: “I wanna sell what you’re buyin’ / I wanna lie on the beach in Hawaii / I want that jet lag from livin’ and flyin’ / Put a smile on your face whilst we’re dining’.”

In fact, the updated version of the song is so ridiculous that Lil Nas X himself was left speechless. The rapper simply posted a screenshot of the chorus of the Kidz Bop song to his Twitter without a caption.

Listen to the Kidz Bop version of Lil Nas X’s “Montero (Call Me By Your Name)” above.

According to a new report from Politico, plenty of GOP heavyweights are starting to get seriously worried about how detrimental some of the more ludicrous conspiracy theories circling amongst their voter base will be to the party as a whole come 2022. Things have gotten so bad that top Trump lieutenants like Hogan Gidley and QAnon-loving Congress members like Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene are speaking out in hopes they can convince MAGA supporters to fill out their ballots when midterms happen, despite many of them believing our current election system is compromised.

“People are going to do whatever they want, and I can’t answer for any of those other groups,” Gidley told Politico when asked about misinformation campaigns and the efforts of “Stop the Steal” believers like Mike Lindell to cast doubt on our voting systems. “But as it relates to election integrity and voter protection, it is vital that we help states get these simple, popular security mechanisms in place to ensure honesty for the 2022 midterms. I want to make sure that the data we gather and the information we share is built on solid ground as opposed to sinking sand.”

Gidley’s view is one shared by top brass Republicans like Arkansas Governor Asa Hutchinson and Senator Roy Blunt, who have publicly criticized Trump and his allies for pulling focus from upcoming midterms to push baseless voter fraud theories about elections that happened nearly a year ago. And, according to a poll conducted by Politico, they’ve got reason to be worried. Among Trump voters, 22 percent said they believed the 2020 Presidential Election was “fair” while just 38 percent expressed the belief that the 2022 midterms would be. That kind of distrust in government is the direct consequence of Trump’s ongoing “Stop the Steal” messaging and it could signal a lower turnout in Republican voters next year.

“When my fellow Republicans are focused on the wrong things, when they’re focused on conspiracies about secret algorithms on voting machines, and they’re focused on ideas there is a group of ballots printed in China snuck in the back door of the board of elections — all those things are easily disproven,” Republican Ohio Secretary of State Frank LaRose told Politico. “But a focus on those things distracts from what I consider the real concerns about election integrity.”

Things have become so dire that even Greene — a mascot for some of the more bizarre conspiracy theories floating amongst party members right now — has had to issue warnings to her voter base.

“I recently conducted a poll on Georgia’s elections and if my constituents felt their votes would count during a teletown hall. Sadly, 4% said they won’t even vote due to voter fraud. This is WRONG. Legal votes by Rs are just as important as stopping illegal ones,” she tweeted.

It’s all fun and games and nonsense about secret sex cabals run by lizard overlords until Republican voters stop showing up to the polls, we guess?

(Via Politico & Raw Story)