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Mom shares blunt truth by perfectly explaining why kids ‘don’t owe their parents’ anything

Most people would rank their parents among the most important and closest relationships in their lives. But how many of these relationships are rooted in feelings of guilt for being cared for as children versus a genuine feeling of love and respect?

How many children are held back in life because they feel obliged to remain obedient to an authoritarian parent well into adulthood?

Lisa Pontius, a mother on TikTok, has caused a stir on the platform by asking people to reconsider their relationships with their parents. Even boldly proclaiming that kids “Don’t owe their parents” anything.


Pontius is a former private chef from New York who moved to South Carolina with her husband to become a full-time stay-at-home mother of two.

In a video that’s been seen over five million times, Pontius argues that it’s wrong for parents to guilt their kids into thinking they owe them a certain type of relationship as adults. The question came about after she made a video discussing the importance of setting boundaries with her own parents.

“Here’s what’s going to piss people off — children don’t owe their parents a certain kind of relationship. And depending on the parent they might not owe them respect either, because that is reciprocal,” she says in the video.

She believes parents shouldn’t expect anything from their children because that’s part of a job they chose. “You’re not loving and providing for your children with the expectation that they will blindly obey and do whatever you say as adults,” she says.

Pontius says that part of being a healthy adult is to reconsider one’s relationship with their parents. She also says that children shouldn’t feel they owe their parents anything for raising them because that’s just “parenting” which they “signed up for.”

@itsme_lisap

Already anticipating the Karen’s in the comments #parenting #parentsoftiktok #parentchildrelationship #respect #boundaries

On the other hand, she believes that parents who are emotionally healthy shouldn’t have to worry too much about their relationships with their adult children. “Honestly, if you’re raising your kids well and you’re an emotionally mature person, you don’t want them to blindly just accept things that are not good for them,” Pontius says.

Nobody chose to be born or decided how they were raised. Therefore, why should anyone feel that they owe a debt to their parents? You’re supposed to take care of your kids. Nobody deserves to take a victory lap or request special treatment because they took responsibility for their offspring.

However, many of us get trapped in unhealthy parent-child relationships because we think we owe our parents something and they try to take advantage.

In the end, Pontius believes it’s all about setting appropriate boundaries.

“Boundaries can be small things, like asking someone to call before coming over or asking visitors to not kiss your new baby,” she told Buzzfeed. “There can also be bigger boundaries, but the goal is the ability to maintain a relationship that doesn’t compromise your mental health or happiness.”

Whether you agree with Pontius or not, her video is a reminder for all of us to seriously consider our primary relationships and to examine whether they are based on genuine affection or a feeling of obligation.

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By Meeting Players Where They Are, An NBA And Harvard Program Is Helping Them Soar

To meet players where they were — homebound, with extra time on their hands — was admittedly easier in a pandemic. To create a sense of community that would instill feelings of confidence and pride to carry over into real life success, and in some cases not be revisited again for years, was more difficult.

In some capacity, that challenge has been at the heart of the NBA’s Crossover Into Business program with Harvard since its inception in 2017. Before Covid ground travel and made gathering together untenable, getting 20 professional athletes in a room together, all of them at different points on their own career trajectories, from different leagues and on separate schedules, could be tough enough. But spend any time talking to the champions of the program, like its creator, professor Anita Elberse at Harvard Business School (HBS), VP of Player Development at the NBA, Jamila Wideman, or the NBA players who count themselves as alumni, and you’ll quickly understand that challenges, distilled down into what they can bring out in people, are the program’s inspiration, learning vehicles, and its surprisingly sunny raison d’etre.

It started with a phone call. Well, before the call, it started with Dwyane Wade and Jerry Stackhouse. The two were enrolled, with about 48 other people, in another of Elberse’s Executive Eduction classes at HBS, ‘The Business of Entertainment, Media and Sports’. The 4-day class was comprised of executives as well as participants from the the talent side — actors, athletes and musicians — its curriculum a mixture of case studies focused on the wholly unique intersection of expertise Elberse has honed using her background in empirical modelling and a keen interest in entertainment, on subjects ranging from Beyonce to FC Barcelona.

The following year, Pau Gasol and Chris Paul (alongside classmates LL Cool J and Channing Tatum) followed suit. After that, Elberse began to field “many, many more requests from players” to the point where the league soon called her to ask, “’What are you guys doing over there at Harvard?’ So I said, why don’t you come and look, and then you’ll see.”

Elberse, who began teaching at Harvard in 2003 and earned tenure eight years later — just the 19th, and one of the youngest, women to ever do so — grew up in the Netherlands, and had considered a career in soccer prior to delving into her own particular kind of academia. Over the phone, she speaks with a cool and open-ended curiosity, recalling a process almost half a dozen years ago with the same bright enthusiasm as if it were just now happening. Her energy, when talking about her programs and the successes participants have found in them, is infectious, and it isn’t difficult to picture high-performing athletes hanging on her words in the classroom.

It was the NBA’s former VP of Player Development, Katie Skidmore, who turned up on campus to sit in on a class. She and Elberse came to the quick realization that the program, while ideal for a handful of players, would’ve been “impossible if you have a group of 80 executives in the room” and added 15 players, the dynamics wouldn’t feel right.

“It’s quite something to have to hold your own in a room with accomplished executives,” Elberse says, “Not every player might be ready for that. So that’s when we said, well, what can we do?”

Using the framework from the Business of Entertainment program, Elberse and the NBA’s Player Development team began to brainstorm a model for basketball players. Set days and times for class meetings, even remotely, would be impossible for most players, so flexibility would be crucial to work around practice and game schedule. So would making the program as “low barrier” as possible.

“When we build programs, and certainly in building with Harvard, we try to identify what the obstacles to participation might be,” Wideman, who started in her role with the NBA in 2018, says, “What are those things that might stand in the way of a player raising their hands?”

The intensive Wade attended has an admission fee of $10k, a price not necessarily prohibitive for him, the other established athletes, A-list entertainers or top-level executives who attend, but steep for a young player just starting out. Making the new program free, including the league covering travel costs to and from campus, so a player at any stage of their career could attend was imperative. For Harvard, Elberse had to be savvy with resources for what was, then, essentially an experiment.

“I didn’t actually tell anyone at HBS that we were doing this because I thought, if I have to explain that I’m offering a free program just for basketball players, no one is going to understand,” Elberse says matter-of-factly, “So I’ll just do it, and then let’s see whether it works or not.”

A kind of hybrid mentorship program was devised. Harvard students would do the teaching, volunteering their time and be matched to athletes in a draft process where players pick mentors based on how each business student’s expertise aligns with their own areas of interest (“The athletes love it. Unless they have a really low number in the draft, and then they’re disappointed,” Elberse laughs). The curriculum would be entirely flexible. If a player is only interested in real-estate, for example, then they would spend their entire semester studying real-estate cases.

“In the beginning, I thought the bottleneck is going to be the students,” Elberse admits, “How many students are volunteering to want to do this? Because the students are not getting anything for it either. They’re not getting credit, they’re just doing it on top of their very busy lives already. And then I thought, well, at some point we’re going to be running into problems with the athletes because how many athletes will want to do this?”

The pilot Crossover Into Business program ran in Fall 2017 and counted ten NBA players, including Chris Bosh, Pat Connaughton and Caron Butler, in its first cohort. In Spring 2018, the program was opened up to WNBA players, as well as athletes from the NFL, MLS, NWSL, UFC and more, and has since seen more than 250 pro athletes complete the course, offered in both the fall and spring semesters.

That growth has been completely organic. The NBA’s Player Development group prides itself on programming that, Wideman tells me, “begins all the way back at draft combine, goes through [the] Draft, Summer League” and into the league’s Rookie Transition Program, all of it focused on getting to know players and what their interests are. In that way, Wideman and her team can “reach back” throughout a guy’s career to recommend programs, like Crossover at HBS. But, Wideman notes, “there’s nothing that is as compelling to the guys as their voices are to each other”, and it’s been word of mouth that’s grown the program within the league and at Harvard, where Elberse has students “signing up in droves”.

“The fact that this program treats players as students really connects up with our notion and our belief that the players that we work with have the capacity to learn, and that they are, fundamentally, really good learners,” Wideman says, adding, “The way in which we were able to structure the program allowed us to meet players where they are. And by that, I mean there was a format that made it possible for current players to participate in the program, with some sort of a hybrid mix of remote work, but also some in-person opportunity, which meant that it was in fact possible for a player in the middle of their career to be pursuing and learning something really different at the same time.”

When Duncan Robinson signed up for the Crossover program in 2018 it was on the recommendation of his friend and program alumni, Connaughton. Robinson, who would become a crucial catalyst for the Heat’s Finals run the following season, was in his rookie year and unsure on what the future held.

“Truthfully, I’ll speak candidly,” Robinson says over the phone, “It was mostly that at that point, I was far from a solidified NBA player. I was just trying to squeeze all the resources that I could get in knowing that I didn’t know how long those opportunities would be around.”

Mentally, Robinson was reconciling the expectations a new NBA player has with the reality of a career not entirely in his own control, while also realizing that he was “right on what I felt would be the precipice of me stepping into more opportunity on the court”, including the potential business opportunities, like endorsement deals and brand partnerships, that come with it.

“I felt that just continuing to educate myself and grow my business acumen in a setting such as that was going to be really beneficial. Just the different case studies, as a lot of them pertain to athletes. I remember doing ones on Dwyane Wade and LeBron James, who are obviously a whole different level of star power than what I am,” Robinson chuckles, “But nonetheless, it just gave me some additional insight into those kinds of decisions and the decision-making process.”

Beyond building acuity for business ventures tied to a person’s current playing career, the Crossover program wants players to start looking ahead to what comes when they step off the court for good, as far off as that future might feel. The average NBA career, even with athletes focusing on continually improving physical and lifestyle practices to extend it, is 4.5 years, a fleetingly short window where a player’s focus can never slip from the game and the continual improvement it demands in hopes of success. It’s a tradeoff that doesn’t allow for much time spent looking in any direction but the immediate future, and something Wideman uses to focus the work she does with players.

“I think because my professional opportunity was, to some degree, unexpected in the sense that the WNBA did not exist at the time that I entered college, I always had in the back of my head and had been planning for what my life after the game was going to look like,” she says, “I’ve always appreciated that I had the chance to explore other aspects of myself, other passions, and imagine from pretty early on how those might take shape in terms of other careers.”

After three seasons in the WNBA and one spent playing overseas, Wideman earned a J.D. from NYU’s School of Law and continued on the theme of activism work she’d taken up in college. She worked for the Equal Justice Initiative in Montgomery, Alabama, litigating on behalf of those facing death sentences, before becoming a staff attorney with the Legal Aid Society in New York City.

“When I look back and think about my career, I can say that I feel a tremendous sense of gratitude,” Wideman says, “the capacity to bring my other passions and interests both into my basketball career while I was playing to explore them and be able to do so to such a degree, that there was a pretty clear path for me when I was done has certainly informed my work alongside my colleagues in the NBA player development group to try to create that possibility for players now.”

Wideman mentions Steph Curry and Kevin Durant as examples of players who have led in expanding their brands across multiple levels of business, noting how “it’s almost become part of the rite of passage” for NBA players to expand not just into traditional endorsements, but through partnerships and their own companies, whether in traditional markets like apparel and lifestyle, or emerging sectors such as tech and multimedia. It’s players taking this kind of leadership in their careers while simultaneously folding in their interests, that Wideman and her team recognize as being foundational for life after basketball, and what the Crossover program with HBS helps to hone. The trickledown effect in the league, Wideman says, is just as significant.

“The visibility and the strength of guys being leaders in their own lives means that our rookie classes, our young guys, have a generation ahead of them who are saying, you know, follow your passions, wherever those happen to lie,” Wideman stresses, adding, “And it’s possible to do that, even if you’re in the midst of being one of the best in the world at something already.”

That phenomena of having a foot in two worlds essentially at odds with each other came up repeatedly in conversations with players who had been through the Crossover program. How difficult, or maybe just strange was it, to plan for a place that none of them hoped to be in for years to come?

“You can never start too early,” Kelly Olynyk says, “If you try and start once you’re retired, you’re already behind the eight ball.”

Olynyk was part of the most recent Crossover cohort and had been encouraged to enrol by Robinson, partially because of all the downtime players would be facing at home and in hotels this past season with league health and safety restrictions in place. Our interview, conducted over the phone as soon as Olynyk stepped off of court at one of the Rockets last practices of the season, a kind of microcosm for the short-term vs long-term duality players face — talking about the far-off future while his body still hummed with reps to better his game.

“In terms of business, when you’re playing sports and you’re in this position to know that sports, basketball, your career, [it’s] going to end one day, and then you’re gonna have to transition into the real world. Most likely the business world,” Olynyk says, “You don’t know what you’re going to want to do and like to do, and what you’re passionate about outside of the game, it takes time to develop that and find that, and realize what it is you enjoy.”

Olynyk looks at his experience in Elberse’s class as “laying the foundation early, so that you have something to build on once the time comes”, but what about players who come to the Crossover program later in their careers, or post-career?

“The focus was all about basketball,” Raymond Felton agrees, “Your focus is all about maximizing the time that you have to play. Me, I really didn’t have time on my mind and in my head space to put towards business, put towards what was next, because I was always trying to maximize as many years as I could playing. But I wish I would’ve, after year 10 or 11, I wish I would’ve said you know what, let me start thinking of some other things outside of this.”

“It helps you mentally to have something else ready, to be prepared,” Felton says, “It was rough for me once COVID hit, and then not getting picked up. Just dealing with all that stuff. There not being a season, they were going to the bubble, then coming back the next year and not having a job again, or playing, it was just like, what am I going to do? All I wanted to do, all I still know, is to play basketball.”

Familiar with the program but unsure if it was happening because of the pandemic, Felton’s agency let him know it was moving forward via Zoom. He was immediately on board. “I had so much time on my hands,” Felton recalls, “Thank God I have my kids, and I could just be daddy full-time. But it can be tough.” He joined the same 2020-2021 cohort as Olynyk.

Felton, who has been honest about not making the call to retire until he feels he is no longer physically conditioned enough to play, viewed at the HBS program as a way to condition his mind for the next step, when it came. His main hope was to come away with a better perspective for business, to gain a more confident outlook rather than treat it as a blind spot. He immersed himself completely, researching the mentors he hoped to draft for himself and familiarizing himself with their credentials.

“It was perfect,” he remembers, “to be able to get two people that were on my list to work with was amazing and wonderful. To get the knowledge from them and look at things in a different perspective, and the way they explained things to me, it was like a perfect fit for me.”

The program’s mentorship structure was something that came up often, with players recalling it, and the mentors they worked with and got to know, as their favourite takeaway. Felton credits his mentors, who he refers to fondly by their first names, with giving him a level of comfort and understanding to what may have initially been unfamiliar concepts. Robinson, who says he had less of a specific type of mentor in mind and wanted someone who he would “for lack of a better term, vibe with more than anything”, keeps in touch with one his mentors, who happens to be based in Miami, inviting him to games or getting together.

“I think it’s a beautiful thing because you know, they’re busy, too,” Felton says of Crossover’s student mentors, “They have their lives as well. Some of them got jobs, some of them are in school still, some of them got jobs and are in school,” he puffs out a breath for effect, “So I just want them to know, personally, that we as athletes thank them and value what they’ve done for us as far as their time. I know some of them have been like, whenever you can work with us, let us know and we’ll work with you. And it’s like, I mean, y’all doing us a favor. So we thank you all for your time for what y’all done for us. I want all of them to know that as well.”

That sense of connection and vested interest is something Elberse credited as making the program as fulfilling for students, but it also helps in more quickly familiarizing athletes, who might initially feel out of their element, with the classroom concepts as well as its setting.

Pre-pandemic, each Crossover cohort would visit Harvard’s campus for the program’s kickoff and the infamous mentor draft selection. It’s an experience that helps to match a tangible sense of place to the experience of the class, and forges a sense of connection between Elberse, mentors and participants. Wideman recalled the experience alumni Cam Johnson and Langston Galloway had in going through the program together first as teammates, then having their relationship develop and “live in a different space, off the court, out of the locker room”.

While Elberse made adjustments, teaching extra sessions to build a sense of community, the remote experience, as we can all relate to, wasn’t quite the same.

“The personality, the personal touch, the networking, crossing over in literal terms doesn’t get to happen as much in the virtual world,” Olynyk says of going through the class remotely, “When you’re in a room with people you can talk and express yourself and just get to know somebody in the physical state, it’s a lot different than just over Zoom.”

Elberse admits she felt that same disconnect, but says she’s sending Harvard jerseys to this year’s alumni “just to give them a sense of belonging”. She’s also told them that the moment campus is open to come and visit, sit in on a class, or that the next cohort’s kickoff will be “twice as big”, to give everyone chance for the experience to really sink in, albeit retrospectively.

The sense of fulfilment Felton drew from the program, even remotely, extended to who he saw participating alongside him. He said it “made him smile” to see so many current players (“And some of them were real young”), in his words, “actually doing some of the things that, you know, probably me and some of my peers, some of the guys that I came in with probably wish we would’ve done a whole lot sooner.” He stresses that it’s not so much that young athletes should feel pressure to act on what they’ve learned right away, but to “have the knowledge to be ready and be prepared for when that day comes.”

It’s a sentiment shared by one of the earliest NBA alumni of HBS, Pau Gasol, who agrees players should “prepare while they are active, and not wait until the very end to work on the things and put things in motion for what’s next in their lives,” adding, “And to prepare mentally and psychologically, which is difficult, to understand that their basketball career is going to be over at some point in the future. And sometimes it happens sooner rather than later.”

Gasol completed the program’s predecessor, alongside Paul, and said he used what he learned in his time there to increase and improve the philanthropic work he does, especially through the Gasol Foundation, noting, “It gave me some good knowledge as far as how we can achieve success, and how can we do better — how can we be exceptional in our field?”

He’s followed the evolution of the Crossover course and its impact on the league since.

“I love that NBA players are taking advantage of it, and hopefully more NBA players will do that as well, because it is useful, and it is important to have that desire to get out of your comfort zone and to learn and to put time and effort into what’s next for you,” he says, the chatter of his happily babbling baby and a riot of birds in the background the only indicator that Gasol, fresh from his title with FC Barcelona, is taking some downtime.

“It’ll be hard to do anything like what they’ve been doing,” Gasol says, “It’s going to be humbling. But at the same time they have to utilize the things that made them successful as basketball players and carry those values and those concepts into their next career, into their next chapter and stage.”

And the next chapter for players is already evolving into something entirely different that Gasol, Felton, or other league veterans experienced. The next generation of NBA players are finding new ways to engage with business, whether by building themselves into their own brands or making inroads to different markets and industries like tech, viticulture, new media, art, fashion or novel amalgamations of the same. The younger cohort of players, who speak social media in shorthand and easily crest its algorithms, paired with the incoming wave of college athletes now empowered by the NCAA’s overdue NIL policy, means that the language of business taught in programs like Crossover Into Business, or its future iterations, will be borrowed from them.

Meeting athletes where they are, then, only requires some rudimentary translation, and a shift in perspective.

One of the biggest realizations Elberse has had through the years of doing the program is that what athletes ultimately tap into exists independently of environment, experience or awareness of what might come next for them, whatever stage of career they happen to be at.

“I think what we do is we just give the athletes confidence,” Elberse says simply, “They underestimate how much they already know about business, and how much they know about great leadership, and how much they know about how effective teams function, which are all really, really important aspects of business,” she says, highlighting players understanding what it’s like to play for a great coach or team captain, or to be part of a team that functions well, just as much as they understand the inverse into dysfunction, “But they just have never seen that as business,” she says, “that’s basketball.”

“What we do is just show them that actually, they do know a lot, and it’s not that hard. It’s sometimes just the language that we use as business professionals,” she continues, “but once we actually put them in that situation through a case, they’re very, very good at applying the knowledge that they’ve gained from sports to those situations.”

“It’s sort of the same notion of more than an athlete. You’re an athlete, but you’re actually really, really good, in many of these other things, otherwise, if it’s just your raw talent, you don’t make it to the top. I guess that’s also a humbling experience for us, in that it might not be about what we teach, but it might just be about giving them access to our resources and putting them in these kinds of situations. And then they’re just soaring, almost from the get go.”

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Stephen Dorff ‘Felt Bad’ About Saying He Was ‘Embarrassed’ For Scarlett Johansson While ‘Sh*t-Talking’ Marvel Movies

Shortly before Black Widow arrived in theaters, Stephen Dorff had some unkind words for the newest Marvel picture. The former Blade antagonist (he portrayed Deacon Frost) declared that he was “embarrassed” for Scarlett Johansson while calling MCU films “garbage.” That dust-up happened while Dorff spoke with The Independent to promote his MMA-fighter performance in Embattled. Dorff made it clear that he shopped around for roles, preferring to “still hunt out the good sh*t because I don’t want to be in Black Widow.” The recent True Detective star insisted that “I really don’t” want to be in Marvel movies, and “I’ll find that kid director that’s gonna be the next Kubrick and I’ll act for him instead.”

These remarks went over to a mixed audience. Some appreciated how he spoke his mind, and others pointed out that he didn’t feel too awful playing a Marvel Enterprises character, back in the late 1990s. Well, Dorff appears to regret at least some of what he said, particularly on how those comments addressed Scarlett, who he described as an “old friend” while responding to TMZ on the street. He indicated that “I felt bad,” and no, he hasn’t watched Black Widow yet. And regarding his remarks about feeling “embarrassed” for Scarlett, who he imagined, “got paid five, seven million bucks” (THR reported in 2018 that the amount was actually $15 million), Dorff wishes to downplay that sentiment, which ended up being the headline of The Independent‘s feature.

“I think that guy in England got me in a moment when I was just [pauses] sh*t-talking a little bit,” the Strange Days actor told TMZ. “And I felt a little bad about it. It happens sometimes.” He prefaced that comment with “I love Scarlett, I think that was taken a little bit out of context. She’s a great actress.” Dorff appeared to be happy to keep talking to TMZ while admitting that he is an Iron Man fan but, in general, doesn’t watch Marvel movies. Instead, he prefers darker comic-book movies like Joker.

Dorff also (while speaking with TMZ) issued a different sentiment for his True Detective Season 3 co-star: “I wish Mahershala the best with the Blade remake. Because they’re re-doing Blade and Mahershala Ali, we did True Detective together and he’s an amazing actor… I wish him the best with that.” When quizzed on whether he’ll appear in the remake, Dorff had an immediate response: “Oh, I don’t think so.”

(Via TMZ)

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The US Government Has Sold Wu-Tang Clan Album Seized From Martin Shkreli

The mythic Wu-Tang Clan album once purchased for an exorbitant sum by “Pharma Bro” Martin Shkreli has finally been sold after being seized by the US government. According to the Justice Department, the sole copy of Once Upon A Time In Shaolin was sold off to pay off the $7.4 million forfeiture judgment against Shkreli for his 2018 conviction on securities fraud. A confidentiality provision in the sale contract protects information about the buyer and price.

The album first made waves in 2014 when it was announced that only one copy of the album would be auctioned off, incensing group members like Method Man. The album was purchased by Shkreli in 2015 with the caveat that it couldn’t be commercially exploited for nearly 100 years. When Shkreli was convicted in 2018 for SEC violations, he played the album while talking about it and tried to sell it on eBay to avoid forfeiting it as part of his sentence. When he was sentenced to seven years in prison, the government appropriated the project for the purpose of auctioning it off to pay his debts.

Of course, just because only one copy of the album exists and can’t be monetized for 100 years, doesn’t mean RZA won’t try to make some money off it anyway. In August 2020, the Wu-Tang leader reportedly began production on a film about the album’s convoluted existence for Netflix.

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Giannis’ Reaction To PJ Tucker Showing Up To Game 6 With Actual Diamond Shoes Is Priceless

The Milwaukee Bucks are still reveling in their championship victory, as they should, having shrugged off past failures to push through to their first NBA title in 50 years. It was a remarkable run, headlined by Giannis Antetokounmpo shredding defenses and the narrative about where the ceiling is for him as a face of a franchise all at once.

Game 6 of the Finals was Antetokounmpo’s masterpiece, as he scored 50 points to close out the Suns and hoist the Larry O’Brien trophy. One of the things that defined this Bucks playoff run was the sense of calm and joy they seemed to show throughout, led by Giannis but with steady hands and joyful faces throughout the roster. Their new additions brought just enough freshness to the roster to make it feel like this year would be different, with Jrue Holiday inspiring more confidence in their backcourt and Bobby Portis bringing a needed energy to their bench unit.

No one, however, seemed to build the connection with their superstar better than midseason addition PJ Tucker, who became quick friends with Giannis in the locker room, with the two regularly bantering with each other. Giannis would regularly find a camera to talk about PJ wearing “diamond shoes,” jabbing at his teammate’s absurd sneaker collection, and so for Game 6 Tucker decided to make Giannis’ joke reality by rocking custom, $250,000 diamond sneakers. When he got to the Bucks locker room prior to the game, Tucker’s first move was to show off a pair of new Freak 3s that Giannis said he’d never even seen, before blowing his mind with the diamond shoes.

Giannis’ reaction is so good to both, first asking PJ how he got a pair of his own signature sneakers before he did. While still reeling from Tucker’s Nike connections, PJ handed him the diamond shoes made by The Shoe Surgeon, which left Giannis speechless. Tucker saying “this is your fault” is tremendous, as he went out and real diamond shoes just to show Giannis up as an all-time flex.

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Mark Hoppus Felt Well Enough To Play Bass For The First Time Since His Cancer Diagnosis, So He Did

Mark Hoppus is in the midst of cancer treatment, and he recently shared that things are going well. Now he’s feeling vital enough to get back to playing music, which he did during a recent Twitch stream. In fact, this was the first time he played bass since he received his diagnosis.

Before playing along to Blink-182’s 2005 song “Not Now,” Hoppus said, “Not only is this the first time that I’ve tried to play these songs in well over a year, this is the first time that I’ve felt well enough to play my bass since I was diagnosed. So… this is the first time I’ve picked up my bass in a few months, even.”

In a recent statement, Hoppus described where he’s at with his treatment, writing, “Scans indicate that the chemo is working! I still have months of treatment ahead, but it’s the best possible news. I’m so grateful and confused and also sick from last week’s chemo. But the poison the doctors pump into me and the kind thoughts and wishes of people around me are destroying this cancer. Just gonna keep fighting…”

Check out Hoppus performing “Not Now” above.

Blink-182 is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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We need to honor the fact that Simone Biles is human, despite her superhuman abilities

Like the rest of the Western hemisphere, I woke up this morning to the surprising news that gymnastic superstar Simone Biles had backed out of the Olympic team finals after an uncharacteristically bad vault performance. After some conflicting reports about a possible injury, it became clear that she was physically fine—it was her mental state that had gotten twisted.

Cue the armchair commentators complaining that she had let the team down, that she’s only concerned about herself, and that she shouldn’t have gone into the competition if she didn’t have the mental toughness to handle it.

Hoo boy. Let’s all just take a deep breath and step back for a second.


We’ve seen the superstar athletes, the stand-outs, the GOATS before—but none of them have been Simone Biles. I mean that in a figurative sense as well as a literal one. She’s her own individual being, but she’s also a stand-out among GOATs. Biles hasn’t just dominated her sport for the past decade; she’s single-handedly pushed the sport to places no one has ever seen. She’s done things no other female gymnast has even attempted, much less succeeded at. Michael Phelps may have dominated in swimming with gold medals, but his individual feats were fractional advancements in the sport (sometimes beating records by fractions of a second), not gigantic leaps to where no athlete in the field had gone before. Judges haven’t even figured out how to score her. Biles’ accomplishments have been mind-blowing.

What that kind of dominance does to a person mentally is unique, especially when it’s happening in the era of social media bombardment. The reality is that no other human being on the planet knows what it feels like to walk—or miraculously defy gravity—in Biles’ shoes.

Biles has repeatedly been called superhuman, unbeatable, unstoppable. She has been called not just the greatest gymnast in the world, but the greatest athlete in the world. And unlike in the past, when public commentary or criticism came from people with some knowledge of a sport and access to a television broadcast, millions of people now constantly pour out their opinions about star athletes on social media. How many times have seen Simone Biles’ name “trending”? That does something to a person, even if they try to ignore it.

Michael Jordan has talked about how he doesn’t know if he would have survived the social media era, and many athletes have talked about the toll today’s media environment takes on them mentally. For Biles to have risen to and maintained her GOAT status at the height of this era is a whole new world. None of us—literally none of us—has any idea what it’s like to be her.

Obviously, you don’t get to where Simone Biles is without extraordinary mental toughness. A woman on an eight-year winning streak, who has won 30 Olympic and World Championship medals (now 31, with the team silver in Tokyo), clearly does not have issues handling pressure.

But every human being has limits, and our turning Biles into a superhuman figure hasn’t done her any favors.

Let’s put it this way. Biles’s body is exceptionally strong, her muscles and tendons and ligaments accustomed to being pushed beyond what any of us can do, her joints able to handle all manner of pressure—and yet, if something went wrong and she landed strangely and broke her ankle, we would all accept and honor that injury. Even if she pulled or twisted something and needed to take a break from the competition to let it heal, we would accept that. We would celebrate all that she had accomplished up to that point and grieve with her for the unfortunate injury. We would never expect her to compete in that compromised physical state, we wouldn’t call her a bad teammate, and no one would remove her from their good graces.

Why is it so difficult to accept that a mental injury can be just as debilitating?

Biles’s decade of dominance has proven that her mind is exceptionally strong, her focus and concentration and confidence are accustomed to being pushed beyond what any of us can do, her ability to perform can withstand all manner of pressure—and yet, when something went wrong mentally and she needed to take a break from competition to let it heal, she immediately lost people’s support. People somehow expect her to be able to “push through” it, as though a mental impairment isn’t as real or serious as a physical one—and as if a mental issue doesn’t pose a physical threat in a sport that involves hurling your body into the air in ways that can kill you if you don’t do it right.

Few of us understand the psychology of elite sports in general, much less the psychology of performing objectively dangerous physical feats, much less the psychology of having everyone expect perfection in dangerous physical feats during high-pressure competition. Add on surviving sexual abuse from your sport’s main physician and being an advocate for others in the same position. Add on the stupid, racist, sexist commentary and criticism that come with being a Black woman in the spotlight. Add on the pressure of not having lost an all-around competition in eight years. Add on constantly being painted as superhuman.

Biles has already shown unbelievable endurance and proven her mental and physical skill, talent, and toughness multiple times over. She owes us nothing. It’s unfortunate that Biles hit a wall at this particular moment, but even with intense training and preparation, we don’t get to choose when our mental or physical limitations will hit.

We have no clue what it’s like to be Simone Biles, but we all know what it’s like to be human. Let’s listen with compassion when she tells us that she’s not superhuman after all, and let her do what she needs to do.

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GOP Rep. Adam Kinzinger Fought Back Tears While Capitol Police Officers Described What They Endured On Jan. 6

After listening to damning testimony from Capitol Police officers who were present at the U.S. Capitol building when it was attacked by MAGA insurrectionists following a Donald Trump rally, Republican Congressman Adam Kinzinger struggled to hold back tears. In doing so, he praised the officers for their bravery and vowing to investigate the attempted coup until the truth is uncovered.

Kinzinger is one of the few Republicans who has broken from the party’s allegiance to Trump, and along with Congresswoman Liz Cheney, he’s been a vocal proponent of an investigation into the January 6 attack, which started with a select committee hearing on Tuesday. As a former military officer, Kinzinger empathized with the Capitol Police officers for going through a grueling ordeal and commended their actions.

Via Mediaite:

“I never expected today to be quite as emotional for me as it has been,” Kinzinger opened. “I have talked to a number of you and gotten to know you. I think it’s important to tell you right now, though, you guys may individually feel a little broken because I’ll talk about the effects you have to deal with and you talked about the impact of that day,” he added, his voice breaking with emotions. “You guys won. You guys held.”

Kinzinger also expressed anger towards his own party for doing a “toxic disservice” to the Capitol officers and the American public by trying to derail the investigation.

“I want to know what happened that day but more importantly I want all Americans to be able to trust the work this committee does and get the facts out there free of conspiracy,” Kinzinger said. “This cannot continue to be a partisan fight.”

(Via Aaron Rupar on Twitter, Mediaite)

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How ESPN And EA Turned Madden Ratings Into A Week Of Debate

Madden ratings have always mattered, but never quite to the level they do now. Between fans reacting on social media, players making the case for why their rating should be higher, the celebration of joining the 99 Club, and an entire week dedicated to them on ESPN, ratings take over the conversation around football this time of year. There’s so much conversation that even the developers of Madden themselves can’t help but notice when places like ESPN are talking about their game.

“It’s always awesome that so many people pay attention to our ratings,” Madden ratings adjuster Clint Oldenburg says to UPROXX. “It’s fun. But I think that it’s also really, really important for a lot of people. It’s the conversation people [want to] have when the NFL’s ready to kick off.”

While it may be a little weird for some to see ESPN personalities like Mina Kimes and former athletes such as Chad Johnson on TV discussing Madden ratings, in reality, this has been a long time coming and it started with a Jacksonville Jaguars training camp of all places.

“The team was seen at a Jacksonville Jaguars training camp” Joe Fraler of EA Sports told UPROXX. “All of a sudden some pictures of the team went viral and people start speculating if this job is actually real and ESPN being, you know, a world leader in sports really started kind of dig into that narrative.”

ESPN’s interest in the ratings discussion ended up sparking a full E60 story about how ratings are created, the work that goes into them, and how it’s far more than just slapping a random number on them. This is a job that requires hours of pouring over tape, numbers, and really digging into the intricacies of football. Considering that Madden was not only the highest-selling sports game of 2020 but the fourth-highest overall, there is an obvious interest in how these ratings are created.

“We were really just fascinated about the process and the algorithms that they use, and the metrics and just how involved it was,” Andy Tennant of ESPN said to UPROXX. “And so we were given the opportunity by EA to take cameras behind the scenes and that they actually have several developers who meet in the conference room and who diligently review NFL tape and specifically gear in on players…whether it’s speed, agility, power, etc, to ultimately arrive at these at these ratings.”

That interest has led to what is now ratings week. An entire week dedicated by ESPN to break down the latest Madden ratings from lineman to quarterbacks, and it’s not just their own personalities weighing in on the discussion. Former players like Marshawn Lynch and Ed Reed are bringing in their own take as well. Surprised to see athletes caring about how they’re presented in a video game? Don’t be. There might be nobody who cares about ratings in Madden are more than the NFL players themselves. Some see it as a sign of respect, while others just want to be as portrayed as accurately as possible, and they’ll go to great lengths to tell EA why their ratings should be presented a certain way. The earlier mentioned Jaguars training camp? The reason EA was there in the first place was that Leonard Fournette had an issue with his own ratings and wanted to be removed from the game entirely! Never say players don’t care about this stuff.

While Fournette’s reaction went viral, it also goes to show the kind of stress that the developers can go through when working on these games. Get something “wrong” in the eyes of the player or fans and they’re going to hear about it. However, while Fournette may have not been too happy, there was a reason for why his rating may have been lower than he expected. Madden is a results oriented game and they can’t just project what they think is going to happen. They have to react to what they’ve seen, and even though Fournette was coming off a strong rookie season, his body of work was only that, a rookie season.

“It really depends on the body of work that we have available to us our stance for the younger players especially the rookies has been prove it.” Oldenburg says. “It’s kind of like how in video game production we have this saying, pitch it, perform it, and prove it and it’s really no different for rating players. If you don’t have a long body of work, we’re not going to overreact… We’re going to need to see it over multiple years.”

Of course, for developers like Oldenburg, the goal is to create the most accurate ratings possible. For the rest of EA it’s about taking those ratings and promoting them in ways that are fun and interesting. While partnering with ESPN on ratings week is one way, another is to celebrate the truly great players. That’s how something like the 99 Club was born, an exclusive group of players that are either rated or were once rated a 99 in Madden.

“We saw a lot of commentary on social with the athletes debating over who should actually get [a 99,]” said Fraler. “And to help shine a light on these guys that are part of the inaugural class each year we decided to take it up a notch.”

“By and large you’re going to need multiple years of doing it at the highest level against the best competition…We very closely pay attention to individual matchups, and who these guys are playing on a weekly basis,” Fraler said. “And so if you look at Davante Adams, you know, over the course of last year and even the previous year it didn’t really matter who was covering him he was still very effective. Nobody really was able to take him away even the best corners and so that speaks volumes as well…But, you know, ultimately, if you’re a fan of football or fan of Madden, and in most cases, both, I think we all have a pretty good sense of who really belongs in the 99 Club, each and every year.”

Would EA’s developers like it if everyone just agreed with their ratings and called it a perfect video game? Absolutely, but everyone knows that no matter how accurate the game actually is there will always be people disagreeing with those ratings. Especially players. That’s where ESPN comes in. To join that conversation, because at the end of the day these ratings are just another form of debate as we wait to see actual football games being played.

“It’s not just about how an individual player react to his rating, whether it’s where he thinks it should be.” says Tennant. “Whether it’s not high enough, or whether it’s too low, it’s also about once that player reacts, there’s then the domino effect of the fans reacting to the players reaction. So this in essence becomes a communal experience. And that’s what we’re all about. We think Madden ratings week is a communal experience and it’s a chance to bring players and fans together to have intense debate about what a player was able to garner in terms of a rating from Madden.”

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Lil Nas X’s Dad Slams DaBaby’s Homophobic Rolling Loud Comments: ‘Bruh Sit Down’

As more fans, supporters, and peers of DaBaby weigh in on the homophobic comments he made during his Rolling Loud set, a new voice has joined the conversation to admonish the North Carolina rapper for his words: that of Lil Nas X‘s father Robert Stafford, who posted his response on Instagram. As Lil Nas X is one of the more prominent queer artists in entertainment today, it seems Mr. Stafford won’t remain silent on an issue that so closely pertains to his son.

Posting a photo of DaBaby posing with Lil Nas X at an awards show, he captioned the photo, “Bruh sit down you had your time.” Indeed, DaBaby has been one of the most popular and bestselling rappers of the last two and a half years, so his platform is massive — and that’s why the way he chose to use it was so irresponsible.

While DaBaby later defended himself on Instagram, saying, “What me and my fans do at the live show don’t concern you n****s on the internet,” the problem is that you can’t just say, “What I do for the live show is for the audience at the live show.” For one thing, the show was live-streamed across the internet for the world to see, and for another, DaBaby clearly doesn’t seem to be considering the effect that his words can have, whether intended and unintended.

When he says “Fellas, if you ain’t sucking dick in the parking lot,” that’s anti-gay rhetoric that has been used to justify committing horrible acts of violence against queer people. When he says “If you didn’t show up today with HIV, AIDS, or any of them deadly sexually transmitted diseases, that’ll make you die in two to three weeks,” that further stigmatizes people who are living with STDs while also spreading misinformation that can put people at risk.

And when he tries to defend himself by saying “the fans at the show were okay with it,” he betrays a critical lack of understanding of cause and effect, makes unwarranted assumptions about who is in the crowd and how they feel about what he said, and discounts the feelings of anyone who tuned into the live-stream only to hear themselves denigrated by his attempt to hype the crowd.

Maybe someone close to him can pull him aside and explain all this, but from what we’ve seen that won’t happen. That’s a shame because it shouldn’t be on “n****s on the internet” with famous gay sons to teach a grown man how to behave with some basic human decency.