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All The Best New Music From This Week That You Need To Hear

Keeping up with new music can be exhausting, even impossible. From the weekly album releases to standalone singles dropping on a daily basis, the amount of music is so vast it’s easy for something to slip through the cracks. Even following along with the Uproxx recommendations on a daily basis can be a lot to ask, so every Monday we’re offering up this rundown of the best new music this week.

This week saw Taylor Swift offer up new sessions for her Folklore tunes, a new Miley album, and Bad Bunny surprise fans. Yeah, it was a great week for new music. Check out the highlights below.

Miley Cyrus — Plastic Hearts

Miley Cyrus has spent her new album’s promotional cycle telling anybody who would listen that she likes rock music and that it had a big influence on her new album. Indeed, that is clear on the album itself: “Midnight Sky” borrows from a Stevie Nicks (who features on a remix of the song) classic, and Joan Jett and Billy Idol make appearances, as does Dua Lipa.

Bad Bunny — El Último Tour Del Mundo

Bad Bunny was already in the conversation about the year’s best albums with YHLQMDLG, but instead of resting on that laurel, he went ahead and pumped out another record. It doesn’t sound quite like his previous music, because, since he recorded it during the pandemic, it was made during unfamiliar circumstances, which he seemingly decided to embrace aesthetically.

Lil Wayne — No Ceilings 3

Wayne’s No Ceilings mixtapes are legendary among his fans, and he continued the series last week with a new installment. The fresh collection nostalgically dropped on DatPiff and it’s headlined by a new Drake collab, “BB King Freestyle.”

Phoebe Bridgers — “If We Make It Through December”

Bridgers puts out a new holiday song around the end of every year, a tradition that she carried into 2020. This time, she opted to bust out a haunting cover of Merle Haggard’s “If We Make It Through December,” on which she is joined by frequent collaborator Ethan Gruska on piano.

Juicy J — The Hustle Continues

Juicy J has been hustling with his solo career for the past decade-plus, and on his latest album, that process continues. For the effort, he is joined by an all-star roster of guests that includes Logic, 2 Chainz, Megan Thee Stallion, and Ty Dolla Sign, among others.

Taylor Swift — Folklore: The Long Pond Studio Sessions

Less than a week ago, Taylor Swift revealed that she and Folklore collaborators Aaron Dessner and Jack Antonoff hunkered down and recorded a live concert film. That premiered on Disney+ last week, but what she didn’t reveal in advance is that she would also share the audio as a live album, which hit streaming services as the film debuted.

Lil Yachty — Lil Boat 3.5

Less and less time passes between standard edition albums and their deluxe counterparts these days, but Lil Yachty has a more traditional-style expanded effort on his hands. Lil Boat 3.5 adds a solid EP’s worth of new material that adds collaborations with Oliver Tree, Vince Staples, Playboi Carti, and Lil Baby.

King Princess — “Pain”

King Princess established herself as a pop superstar in the making last year with Cheap Queen, and recent activity suggest her debut album’s follow-up may soon be on the way. Last week, she dropped her second single of 2020, “Pain,” which she called “probably my favorite song I’ve ever written.”

Saint Jhn — “Smack DVD” Feat. Kanye West

Saint Jhn got a feature from Kanye West on his latest, “Smack DVD,” but ‘Ye didn’t have as much input on the track’s video. In the visual, Jhn playfully addresses the fact that he didn’t run the clip by Kanye, who may not have loved the stripper-filled video given his newfound piety.

Rina Sawayama — “Lucid”

People living through 2020 could use some encouragement, and that’s what Sawayama aimed to provide on “Lucid.” She said of the track, “2020’s been a tough year so I wanted to finish it off with a dance bop to take us into a more hopeful 2021.”

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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100 Gecs, Haim, And Others Contribute Bite-Sized Loops For A New Charity Compilation

It’s not uncommon to see popular songs that are under three minutes in length. The original version of Lil Nas X’s “Old Town Road” (without Billy Ray Cyrus) for example, is actually under two minutes long. London-based label PLZ Make It Ruins has taken brevity to the next level with its new compilation, though, which features a slew of loops that are all just 1.8 seconds long.

PLZ Make It Ruins Presents Locked Grooves is set to be released on December 4, and proceeds will be split between the ACLU and Liberty UK. Artists represented on the tracklist include Arca, Blood Orange, Clairo, Dominic Fike, Four Tet, Haim, Kenny Beats, Mura Masa, Octo Octa, Porches, and Skrillex.

Listen to 100 Gecs’ contribution, “One Bar To Rule Them All,” above and find the PLZ Make It Ruins Presents Locked Grooves tracklist below.

SIDE A
1. 100 Gecs — “One Bar To Rule Them All”
2. Arca — “UwU”
3. ARTHUR — “rest_less”
4. Blood Orange — “MORRIS”
5. Buddy Ross — “Future”
6. Channel Tres — “Locked In”
7. Clairo — “Jasper”
8. Daniel Aged — “3 pictures”
9. Dijon — “PEACKOCK!”
10. Dominic Fike — “Cheesy Wine”
11. Duval Timothy — “Penny Sweet”
12. Eris Drew — “The Beat That Never Dies”
13. Floating Points — “Recourting”
14. Four Tet — “If You Spin Your Love Around”
15. Haim — “I Know Alone”
16. John Glacier — “Shiny Sounds”
17. Kelsey Lu — “Only”
18. Kelvin Krash — “Guardian Angel”
19. Kenny Beats — “dontoverthinkshit”
20. King Krule — “Moonnn”

SIDE B
1. Lauren Auder — “Thorn”
2. Loraine James — “Sooth”
3. Matthew Tavares — “I Know Myself”
4. Mica Levi — “⚕
5. Mk.Gee — “LL6 +50c”
6. Mura Masa — “Reassurance Loop”
7. object blue — “print sprint”
8. Octo Octa — “My Heart”
9. Oli XL — “Puppet”
10. OTTO — “Mr. Bilberry Badger’s Ringtone”
11. Overmono — “5 More Years Loop”
12. Porches — “:*)”
13. Raveena — “Heartbeat Blip””
14. Romil Hemnani — “rope”
15. Shygirl — “Shy Tag”
16. Skrillex — “Italian Sushi”
17. tn_490 — “Plus four runner”
18. Vegyn — “Circle”
19. Yawning Portal — “Lovely Poison in a Jade Wine Cup”
20. Zsela — “Liza”

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Melania Trump’s Sudden Enthusiasm For Christmas Is Not Going Over Well With The Internet

Despite her husband losing the 2020 presidential election, Melania Trump has been hard at work on this year’s White House Christmas display. We also know that the first lady hated every minute of it, thanks to the infamous “Melania Tapes” that revealed her true feelings about her yuletide duties. Released in the fall, the recordings were made by Melania’s former best friend and senior advisor Stephanie Winston Wolkoff. The tapes showed a first lady who disliked not only managing the Christmas decorations, but also being asked about children in cages. It was not great. Via CNN:

“I’m working … my a** off on the Christmas stuff, that you know, who gives a f*ck about the Christmas stuff and decorations? But I need to do it, right?”

She continued, “OK, and then I do it and I say that I’m working on Christmas and planning for the Christmas and they said, ‘Oh, what about the children that they were separated?’ Give me a f*cking break. Where they were saying anything when Obama did that?

Now, here’s a reveal of the 2020 White House Christmas display.

It appears to be a step up from years past, particularly the dreaded 2018 blood tree display that looked like it came straight out of The Handmaid’s Tale. (Perhaps a subtle foreshadowing of Amy Coney Barret’s Supreme Court nomination?) However, the internet isn’t about to let the first lady live down her “Bah Humbug” remarks, and the comments have been going to town on this year’s Christmas video.

(Via Melania Trump on Twitter)

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The ‘Fargo’ Finale Frozen Five: A Mystery Solved And A Blood-Soaked History Lesson

The Fargo Frozen Five is Uproxx’s weekly collection of thoughts, observations, and goofball screencaps from each new episode of the FX limited series’ fourth season. We do not guarantee that there will be five items every week. There could be four, or six, or a dozen. Who knows? This show doesn’t follow the rules. We shouldn’t have to either.

Episode 11 — “Storia Americana” (or “Josto And Loy And The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day”)

5a. I think we all knew Josto Fadda was not making it out of this season alive. There was just no conceivable combination of events that could have let him survive. There were two primary reasons for this: One, major characters who are involved in crime rarely survive a season of Fargo; two, he was a mouthy little self-important weasel who was obsessed with acquiring/maintaining power and he talked down to anyone he perceived as beneath him (so… everyone), and those types of characters rarely survive any show, with Pete Campbell from Mad Men being the most notable exception. Still, I did not have “double-crossed by his consigliere and framed for killing his father and brother and dumped in a dirt pit with a hole in his head next to the serial killer who actually did murder his father and later gave him a tugjob in the car while humming ‘Battle Hymn of the Republic.’” I think the real problem here isn’t so much a lack of imagination on my part as it is a lack of imagination on the show’s part. This is a show that, as recently as two episodes ago, sucked up a killer in a black-and-white tornado and launched him into the heavens. In the next episode, my sweet hefty prince Gaetano tripped and blew off 45 percent of his head with his own gun. Compared to those, Josto’s demise felt… normal. Straightforward. Perfectly explainable. Which is fine — ideal, even — for another show that traffics in straightforward, sensible answers. For Fargo, a show that does not do that, the normalcy of it felt weird and a little unfulfilling. In any event, rest in peace you little creep.

5b. Big shoutout to Doctor Harvard, the pretentious hospital administrator who survived Oraetta’s strychnine macaroons and fingered her for her litany of crimes, for tossing together the phrase “the wolf in sheep’s clothing had me bamboozled” as one of his last acts as a living person, just before he got bonked unconscious and filled with bullets by Josto.

5c. Shoutout to Josto, too, I guess, for the dramatic flair he displayed in killing off the doctor and his fiancée’s politician father. Is “flicking a cigarette into a pool of gasoline and then walking away from the explosion it eventually causes” a bit of a trope? Yes, sure, it happens a lot. But it happens a lot because it looks cool as hell. Fine by me. Do it in every show. Let Ted Lasso blow up some stuff. See what I care.

FX
FX

4. Loy Cannon didn’t make it out alive either, which surprised me for reasons I should have disregarded. Why did it surprise me that Zelmare Roulette knifed him on his porch as retribution for his hit on Swanee? I absolutely should have seen that coming, even after the show brought Satchel back home alive (more on this in a minute), and even after Ebal screwed him out of half his business in a move that winked at both how immigrants who assimilate as white have taken from those who can’t as long as America has existed and how huge corporations pushed out small businesses on every Main Street in America. It was a tough season for Loy. He thought his son died, his best friend did die, his plan to invent the credit industry got yoinked by Diner’s Club, and then he got hoodwinked by the guy he helped put in power at the top of the rival organization in town. Maybe that’s why I thought he would survive, because the show had been taking things from him all season. But again, I should have pushed that thought away. Fargo isn’t big on moral victories. And Loy was a loansharking criminal who preyed on the weak. This was bound to happen. It still made me a little sad. I don’t know.

4b. It was nice that Zelmare got the final word regarding Swanee but I can’t help but feel like the show wasted what was generally a very fun character. She and Swanee were a hoot, especially Swanee, and I wonder if the show bit off so much at the start that it couldn’t service all of its characters even as it thinned the herd via murder. There might have been just too much going on. It’s a shame for a bunch of reasons but one of the bigger reasons is that Zelmare and Swanee could have been a whole show.

4c. Do we got oranges scattered about the scene of a dead mob boss as a younger relative looks on in sadness and confusion like we up and transported into The Godfather? Baby, you know we do.

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3. If we’re running down characters of note who ended the season somewhat less than alive, then I suppose we should also say goodnight to Oraetta Mayflower, the Minnesota-nice nurse who loved baking and vigorous sexual escapades almost as much as she loved murdering people. She really did love murdering people. She loved it so much. She even loved watching people get murdered by someone else, which we discovered in her last moments when she asked if Joe Bulo could shoot Josto first so she could watch and then smiled like a freak as Josto’s brain juice got soaked up by the dirt. Probably best for the hospital patients of the Midwest that she’s gone, but she was kind of fun (I mean, as far as mentally disturbed Angels of Death go), so… No, let’s not talk ourselves into looking at a murderess who collected tokens of her victims and stole drugs from the hospital with rose-colored glasses. It’s definitely a good thing she’s in that hole.

FX

2a. While I think I would have appreciated young Satchel Cannon roaming the streets alone with his doggy friend and pulling guns on various yokels that cross him like a little independent renegade, I cannot argue with the look of overwhelming happiness and relief on Mama Cannon’s face upon seeing her thought-dead baby alive and sauntering down the stairs. That was nice. I very much want to see Mama Cannon happy because Mama Cannon rules. I only have two bones to pick, really. The first is that Satchel left the front door open when he came home, and that one is only because I’ve been on the receiving end of enough “Were you born in a barn?”s to know he was raised better than that. He’s a good boy. He’s not wasting that electricity. I’m sure of it. The second thing is… let’s start a new section.

2b. Yes, Satchel Cannon is Mike Milligan. The mid-credits scene confirmed the thing many of us suspected as soon as we did the “the guy who is raising him is named Milligan and the timelines work out and they brought in Joe Bulo so we know the universes are connected” math. I don’t know if the show intended it to be a big reveal that people sniffed out early or if the show was winking that was on purpose all season and waiting to pay it off. Either way, there it was, with a Bokeem Woodbine cameo and everything. As I mentioned above, I kind of wish he had never come home first, if only because he already had all the origin story he needed and I like the idea of him being a globetrotting self-made man. I had that all worked out in my head. Now I have to figure out how and why he left home — and his Mama — again and left their name behind in the process. It’s a tough spot to be in. I like being right but I don’t like thinking a lot. Let’s just focus on the first part.

FX

1.The season ended as it began, with Ethelrida explaining the history of America in her report, complete with a bit about winners and losers and who gets to tell the stories from the past versus who gets their stories told. She was one of the most interesting characters on the show this season — she took down a serial killer and outwitted Loy Cannon’s organization and she knows French, which is less important than the first two but still impressive — and the show might have been better off giving her more to do. If we assume this whole season was told by Ethelrida in her history report (which would be weird, especially considering all the murder and autoerotic asphyxiation), I think I’d give her a B or a B-. There was an interesting story with some fun twists and notable figures, but it all kind of lagged in places and the payoff left something on the table. Ethelrida won’t be happy about getting a B, if I know her like I think I do at this point. But the truth is, a B or a B- season of Fargo is still a better ride than an A or A- effort out of a lesser show. We’re grading on a curve here. It’s not fair but, as we saw repeatedly from this season, life rarely is.

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A Fox News Anchor Isn’t Having It With Trump’s Lie-Filled Fox Business Interview With Maria Bartiromo

It’s Fox News anchor against Fox Business anchor, which is something that no one would have expected to see a year ago (since Shep Smith left town, that is), but President Trump’s fake “election fraud” claims are tearing the cable news set apart. Things were bound to get interesting after Fox and Friends crapped all over Trump’s conspiracy about evil software changing people’s votes, even as Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson are keeping their tin-foil hat-dream alive. And now, Eric Shawn isn’t here for colleague Maria Bartiromo’s lie-filled Trump interview from this past weekend.

This would be the same interview in which Trump complained to Bartiromo about “massive dumps” that cost him the election. That’s bizarre enough, but Bartiromo didn’t challenge any of Trump’s claims, despite judge after judge shutting down the Trump campaign’s “voter fraud” lawsuits and the New York Times securing statements from state officials, who all say there’s no evidence of voter fraud. Trump, however, insisted to Bartiromo that there’s “so much evidence” to support his allegations, and mean judges “won’t allow us” to run with it.

Bartiromo did no fact-checking on Trump’s baseless claims. In response, CNN’s Brian Stelter stated, on air, of the interview, “This was not hardball. It wasn’t even softball. It was t-ball.” Stelter also tweeted this clip of Eric Shawn’s on-air refutation of the debacle.

Here’s what Eric Shawn said:

“He doubled down on his claims of widespread voter fraud in the 2020 election, even though local and national election officials, as well as federal and state courts in multiple states, and in some cases the Trump campaign’s own lawyers, have said there is no evidence to prove that. Experts say such claims are unsupported falsehoods that are not backed up by any facts.”

Things are not looking good for Maria Bartiromo here, right? She was cool with Trump declining to provide the evidence that he insists exists, despite experts and state officials insisting that this evidence does not exist. It’ll be interesting to see how Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson handle this one, given that Bartiromo (as Vox’s Aaron Rupar puts it) is “basically a North Korean news anchor now.”

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The Five Things That ‘Shameless’ Must Deliver During Its Final Season

The Gallagher family will soon take a final lap on Showtime’s Shameless for an eleventh season to match the duration of the show’s U.K. counterpart, which (of course) entered finale territory in a different manner. For one thing, we’re still in the middle of a pandemic, one that pushed back Showtime’s summer release plans. Following rewrites, the show got back on course for a December 7 return date with plans to not-ignore what’s happening with a Chicago South Side spin. One can obviously expect the show to tackle Covid-19 in a different context than, say, the gruelingly appropriate Grey’s Anatomy treatment that’s ongoing. Whether the Shameless version will treat the virus with gallows humor or as a strictly-practical component of the story, who knows?

What is more certain, though, is that many open threads remain from the most recent season, which capped off the show’s Emmy Rossum-less voyage. Mickey and Ian are now married (will it last?), Lip has fallen off the wagon after another blowout with Tami, and Frank’s still an irredeemable mess. According to this season’s synopsis, Carl will become a cop (no kidding) while Lip juggles increased patriarch duties. Series creator John Wells also revealed that Debbie must register as a sex offender, which feels like post-dated comeuppance after she lost her virginity (and became pregnant) by raping Derek back in Season 5. So, those things will definitely happen, but what else should happen? I made a wish list for the last Shameless rodeo.

5. At least drop some hints about a future spinoff:

Showtime

Not too long ago, the show torched its best chance at setting up a spinoff for Liam, who would have been ideal to revisit in a few years or even a decade. The framing was optimal, given that Liam found a role model (Mavar) outside of the family and a real chance at escaping Gallagher-dom. Unfortunately, Liam — after showing a ton of character development and exasperated awareness of his purpose as a tool for Frank’s grifting — instead chose to tell Mavar to go to hell. It made no sense after the writers propped up Liam’s situation, so that he might actually break away from the Gallagher cycle, but yeah, I gave up on a Liam-and-Mavar buddy-comedy series. Now, I can only hold out hope that Veronica and Kevin could fuel their own little spinoff-startup down the street. They are endlessly entertaining and a lot less stressful to witness than the Lip-and-Tami train. Oh, and Frank definitely would not be invited to the party, and that’s a promising detail that can’t be overlooked for a fresh take to launch a franchise.

4. Put a fork in Frank, for real this time:

Showtime

Enough, already. Yes, Frank is an anthropomorphized cockroach, but even roaches can be exterminated. After he’s caused misery (and even, in some cases, death) to so many people in his path, the time has finally come for Frank to die. How should it happen? That’s a tough one. It shouldn’t be a coronavirus-caused death. That’d be too fraught with mixed emotions, and it would paint Frank in a sympathetic light. That can’t happen. He’s trash, so he needs to go out as a direct consequence of his own actions. Or fall into the river. I’d be alright with that, too. Don’t let anyone be sad about it, and don’t make it bleakly funny either. Frank ceased to be comic relief seasons ago, and after he faked his own demise and somehow survived destroying his own liver, the show should just do it and move right on to the next scene. He deserves no more and no less.

3. Let’s see both Mandy Milkovich-es: Why not?

Showtime

Alright, I’m being absurd here, but I think that a fine bottle episode could be had by bringing back Mandy, and by that, I mean both Mandys. So, we’d see the version sweetly played by Jane Levy and the gritty devolution portrayed by Emma Greenwell. That tonal transformation was abrupt (even though it made sense without explanation), and Mandy never saw a proper resolution to her story. Instead, we saw her return for one Season 6 episode, when she called upon Ian to help her dispose of a dead body. That latter Mandy incarnation saw only tragedy and left her abusive family home to become an escort. I’d like to see the show actually put the two Mandys together (one perky and the other world-weary), and they could exact vengeance upon those who wronged them. It’d be nuts. Come to think of it, I’d watch Being Mandy Milkovich as a spinoff, too.

2. Allow Lip to feel enduring (and maybe even everlasting) happiness:

Showtime

I got silly, and now it’s time to get serious. The death of Lip’s sobriety (the last time we saw him) was one of the greatest tragedies ever highlighted on this show. Years of hard work slipped down the drain, and now, he must claw his way back while juggling unsustainably increasing family responsibilities and dealing with Tami’s garbage treatment of him. Things are never as real for anyone else on Shameless than they’ve been for Lip, but it’s time to cut this guy a break. At least, let him achieve some form of peace. More AA meetings. More doing well at work. More of concentrating upon his own kid, rather than raising his siblings. Maybe less of Tami would help, and Lip surely deserves some freaking self-care time. I don’t care what it is: working on bikes, getting a mani-pedi, whatever he needs to unwind. Let him live some semblance of a normal life.

1. Bring back Fiona for the finale, and let Steve/Jimmy come, too:

Showtime

I might get roasted for this one because Justin Chatwin’s character was very clearly a con artist, but he was still somehow less of a d*ck to Fiona (when he wasn’t disappearing, that is) than any other dirty, rotten scoundrel she dated. I mean, he didn’t exactly want to get kidnapped and stuffed on a boat and forced into “slave labor at a Brazilian cocoa processing plant,” right? Yeah, that was probably semi-embellishment from Steve, but he let Fiona know upfront that he was trouble. Whereas her other boyfriends hid drug addictions, publicly humiliated her, and gaslit her into oblivion. So if Emmy Rossum plans on making a quickie appearance as the show bows — and let’s face it, this has to happen — allow her to her do it after secretly reconciling with her first love on the show. It’d be a grand surprise to see this happen after Shameless finally removed Chatwin’s naked butt from the opening credits last year. Let the butt come back, too! And maybe Steve will have the medical degree that he wanted, so he can refuse to let Frank once again grift his way into organ-donation-land. See, now we’re having fun and solving problems because, guess what? Frank must die.

Showtime’s ‘Shameless’ will return on December 7.

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Meek Mill Wants To Team With Sony Or Microsoft For A Big PS5 Or Xbox Holiday Giveaway

When Meek Mill isn’t rapping, he’s doing his best to do good for his community through various initiatives. Now, he’s trying to get a big-time video game player involved in a new one, as he wants to team up with Sony or Microsoft to give away some new PS5 and Xbox consoles to kids who might not otherwise be able to have one.

Over the weekend, Mill tweeted, “Play station or Xbox should do a collab with us in the hood with those PS5’s and new Xbox’s this Christmas for the ones who can’t afford em! I’ll put up money…I do big toy drives in Philadelphia every year let me know.. them games keep them kids out of them bad environments!”

Indeed, the toy drives Mill mentioned he does are big. Last year, he and Dreamchasers hosted the second annual drive, which provided toys to over 3,500 kids. For the event, Mill was joined by NBA player Trey Burke, rapper Shawn Smith, boxer Darmani Rock, and dirt biker Chino Braxton.

Mill has also been helping out during the pandemic, as his and Jay-Z’s Reform Alliance got a $10 million donation for protective equipment in prisons. Meanwhile, around this time last year, he and Michael Rubin outlined a plan to donate millions of dollars to Philadelphia schools.

Meek Mill is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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‘The Rise Of Skywalker’ Made The Prequels Better, Somehow

It’s tempting – tempting! – to explain away the recent, undeniable resurgence of the Star Wars Prequels the same way Poe Dameron explains the return of Emperor Palpatine in The Rise of Skywalker: “somehow the Prequels returned,” and just be done with the whole thing with no further explanation. But, no, there’s a lot going on here and, unfortunately for me, I can’t help but find the whole thing fascinating. Or, in other words, using current internet slang that I know in a few years I’ll regret: The Star Wars Prequels live in my head rent-free.

At first I tried to ignore the post-The Rise of Skywalker Prequels surge, thinking it would fade. But the lack of no new Star Wars movies anywhere on the immediate horizon has let this surge continue unabraded. Actually, the lack of any real blockbuster type movie has probably played a role here. But it’s tricky, because is this a case of actually misjudging these three movies? Or was The Rise of Skywalker just such a misfire we are getting the weird, “In retrospect, George W. Bush was actually good,” type of phenomenon going on? In reality, it’s probably a little bit of both.

A friend of mine always makes this great point about the Star Wars Prequels: If they had a different director, better acting, and better dialogue, they’d be pretty great. On the surface that seems very dismissive. But when you pick apart what that means, there’s a lot of truth there. Because the overall arc of the three films, the story, is actually there. Compare that to The Rise of Skywalker, which had a great director, good acting, and decent enough dialogue. If the story isn’t there from beginning, the movie is doomed before it even begins. Which is why both my appreciation and my frustration for the Prequels has increased. My appreciation because it’s a great story and, as we’ve seen, that’s not a given. My frustration because it’s all right there, it’s just not properly executed.

The thing that made the Original Trilogy work so well is that even though all three movies had a different director, the central storyteller was Lucas himself. And even though Lucas made things up as he went along – contrary to some opinions the Original Trilogy was certainly not “all laid out” before they were individually written; in the first draft of The Empire Strikes Back Vader still wasn’t Luke’s father, and Leia being Luke’s sister was a pretty lazy way to tie up a loose end Lucas didn’t want to explore any further – at least it was his story to make up as he went along. As we saw in the Sequel Trilogy, filmmaking out of spite for the other director who didn’t do what you would have done doesn’t really make the best story. Lucas doesn’t get enough credit for writing the second draft of The Empire Strikes Back, which is the first draft that looks anything like the final movie. But he was smart enough to hire Lawrence Kasdan to come in and tighten up the dialogue. And the dialogue in that movie is tight. Then Lucas just let Kasdan write the third movie himself, based on Lucas’s story.

Lucas should have followed this template for the Prequels. He’s mentioned numerous times he hates directing, yet he directed all three Prequels himself. And, yeah, it kind of shows in all three of them that he hates directing. (He assembled a fantastic cast for those movies, but didn’t really put them in a place to succeed. A lot of “acting with tennis balls.”) And he wrote all three scripts himself without anyone (at least officially) punching them up for him.

Over the years I’ve had a lot of different opinions about The Prequels. In fact, there’s probably nothing I’ve changed my mind on more, and more dramatically, then those three movies. I saw all three of them at midnight the night they came out and, on first watch, I loved all three. Then, over the next few weeks that followed each, after repeated viewings, I slowly realized that there were some real problems. I fell for this same routine every time, three times in a row. (The Rise of Skywalker is still the only Star Wars movie I disliked while watching for the first time. And I had paid money to fly myself across the country to the premiere: literally the best atmosphere to watch a Star Wars movie. I mention this to point out, at the time, I certainly thought I’d be liking this movie.)

After The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi (two movies I still like or love, individually) I wrote how the Prequels would become these weird three movies, that look nothing like the other movies, and would almost be strange footnotes that would wind up becoming “cool.” (Yeah, I admit that was somewhat wrong. Though, the “cool” part isn’t far off. But I sure didn’t see The Rise of Skywalker coming, a movie so scattershot, we’d have to rethink everything about this franchise.) I’ve also written that Revenge of the Sith was the worst Star Wars movie, primarily because the story was all set up. It was an easy slam dunk, yet it still somehow missed. (I still maintain Revenge of the Sith is still the worst prequel for the very reason I thought so before. But I no longer think it’s the worst Star Wars movie. To the point I now actually see some merit in ROTS.)

Oh, yes, speaking of having a movie all set up for an easy slam dunk… When The Rise of Skywalker came out a year ago, I expected the people who hated The Last Jedi — for having the audacity to actually take chances with the characters — to grit their teeth and pretend they liked The Rise of Skywalker. What I wasn’t expecting was those people to dislike The Rise of Skywalker, yet still somehow blame it all on Rian Johnson, who had literally nothing to do with that movie. The talking point goes that of course The Rise of Skywalker is bad because the way The Last Jedi left off, there was nowhere to go. Oh puh-leeze. The Last Jedi ends with our heroes being defeated and barely escaping, with now so few of them left they all fit comfortably on the Millennium Falcon. Meanwhile, Kylo Ren just killed his boss and has now taken over an entire military.

Here’s the truth: from that ending you can literally do anything. The sky is the limit. It’s the opposite of being painted into a corner. The possibilities are literally endless. And, yes, as it turns out, one possibility was “retcon the things the new team didn’t like about the middle movie.” Again, as it turns out, a movie and plot driven solely by pure spite doesn’t really make a great movie. I’d understand this line of thinking if, in the last scene of The Last Jedi, Poe says to Rey, “Now we must go find the doohickey that leads us to the hidden asteroid planet that leads us to the knife that leads us to knife map that leads us to the Death Star that leads us to a room in the Death Star.” If that had happened, yeah I suppose the next movie needs to clear that all up. But give me a break that that just had to be the plot of The Rise of Skywalker.

And, see, it’s in moments like right now, going through the plot points of The Rise of Skywalker – that literally all sound fake as I write them out, but, somehow, aren’t – that makes me think fondly of all three Prequels. Well, just the fact they don’t exist as spite is a big thing going for them. But when I think of them and think of the story – they endear themselves to me. They have an actual point of view. They are legitimately trying to say something. When they veer too close toward something confusing and boring about the Force – midichlorians – they just drop the subject and move on instead of doubling down on Force dyads, or whatever. You see, right now I’m pretty sure I like these movies!

And then I watch them and I immediately go back to, “Well, there are some cool scenes and the story really is great, but there are moments when these are not easy to watch.” But that’s the key, “moments when these are not easy to watch.” That’s a far cry from, “I can’t watch this.” I’ve literally tried re-watching The Rise of Skywalker over the past year and I just can’t do it. It’s just too big of a mess. Again, the story itself, from the beginning, is just so off from the start, nothing can save it. It’s the exact opposite of the Prequels. And that’s why the Prequels will always live on with us, because we know they are like Darth Vader in Return of the Jedi. We know there’s some good in there and we will forever try to mine that good out of those movies. And, now, after much thought, I think it’s worthy to keep trying. To paraphrase Vader’s last words, “You were right about them. You were right.”

You can contact Mike Ryan directly on Twitter.

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Rudy Giuliani Had A Weird Explanation For The Black Goo That Leaked Down His Face During A Press Conference

Rudy Giuliani’s press conference on November 19 was an all-timer. Not only did Donald Trump’s highest-priced, most bumbling lawyer quote My Cousin Vinny and break out a terrible Joe Pesci impression, black goo started leaking down his face.

Fox News called him a liar, Anderson Cooper said he was “pathetic,” and even Geraldo Rivera, the same Geraldo who thinks the COVID vaccine should be called “the Trump,” has had enough of the former-mayor of New York City. Giuliani didn’t discuss the Venom-looking ooze at the time — he was too busy peddling false conspiracy theories about the election — but he joked it about on a recent episode of The Not Even a Show.

When asked by comedian Chris James about the “black stuff that was seeping out of your head,” Giuliani replied, “Oh my God, it was some of my brains, it was some of my brains. I was thinking so hard. God, it was like, this was a very rough press conference, gotta get everything across, gotta think really hard.” Those are the kind of comedy chops that got him an SNL hosting gig (seriously, what a strange little man). Rudy also said he used a “rag” to put his brain back in, which “rejuvenated” his “brainpower.” This rag?

You can watch The Not Even a Show episode below.

(Via Mediaite)

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Cardi B Explains Herself Following Backlash For Her Huge Thanksgiving Celebration

Thanksgiving was last week and the holiday could mean bad news for life in the pandemic. Dr. Anthony Fauci believes there could be a surge of coronavirus cases after people travel to and from Thanksgiving celebrations, and the CDC website recommended celebrating with people you live with and/or having virtual celebrations with those who don’t share the same roof with you. So, when Cardi B revealed over the weekend that she had a big Thanksgiving gathering, she saw some backlash.

Last night, Cardi reflected on her holiday weekend, writing on Twitter, “12kids and 25 adults over the holidays.It was lit !!” Following that tweet, there were responses critical of Cardi’s decision to have a large celebration, like one that read, “i hope it was worth it for you and those 25 adults and 12 kids. i truly hope it was because i can promise you it’s not worth it to everyone else who is affected by your poor choices aka the healthcare workers who you will run to when you’re sick.”

Cardi insisted, however, that she was abundantly cautious in preparing for the event, saying that she “spent soo much money” on coronavirus tests for everybody in attendance. She tweeted, “Sorry my bad wasn’t trying to make nobody feel bad.I just had my family in my home for the first time and it felt so good & uplifted me .I spent soo much money getting every1 tested but it felt worth it.I wasnt trying to offend no1.” She later added that regular testing has become a part of her routine, writing, “ME specially and everyone that works around me get tested literally 4 times a week.Im In the middle of work and Everytime we clock in we MUST GET TESTED !” She also wrote, “People be trying tooo hard to be offended.I wonder how they survive the real world [laughing emoji].”

Meanwhile, despite what Cardi declares in “WAP,” it appears that she did in fact cook something for Thanksgiving.

Cardi B is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.