Chris D’Elia is an actor, host of the Congratulations podcast, and a stand-up comic with three one-hour Netflix specials (and an episode of the streaming giant’s comedy series, Comedians Of The World) under his belt. His latest, No Pain, is available to stream now. In the special, D’Elia jumps from talking about growling at babies at the mall to airdrop pranks, bad X-Men mutants, and revelations about sex-crazed dolphins and their lack of boundaries.
D’Elia was nice enough to answer a few questions for us as a part of the ongoing Uproxx 20 series, recalling an all-timer meal in a mall with Tom Arnold, listening to Tupac through the tears, and letting it be known that anything is on the menu if Nic Cage stops by for dinner.
1. You walk into a bar. What do you order from the bartender?
I don’t drink, so club soda. The bubbles are my alcohol.
2. Who’s your favorite person to follow on Twitter and/or Instagram?
Either Brendon Walsh (@brendonwalsh) or Coffee Dad (@coffee_dad).
3. What’s currently waiting for you on your DVR or in your streaming queue?
Any thriller that ever comes out goes into my queue. I have The Platform in there… and the very thrilling NO PAIN, which is my comedy special.
4. It’s your last meal — what are you going out with?
My dad’s pasta, no doubt.
5. What websites do you visit on a regular basis?
What’s a website? I use Twitter and Instagram.
6. What’s the most frequently played song on your mobile device?
I don’t really listen to music, it makes me cry and I don’t wanna do that. Tupac though.
7. If you could go back and give your 18-year-old self one piece of advice what would it be?
Don’t worry, it’ll work out.
8. What’s the last thing you Googled?
Uproxx
9. Dogs or cats?
Dogs. Come on. Cats? Lol get outta here.
10. Best concert of your life was…?
Johnny Cash was my first. Tough to beat for a first concert. My brother was 5 and screamed “Not another song about GOD.”
11. What book are you most likely to give as a gift?
Catcher in the Rye.
12. What’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you?
My mom and dad raised me. That was nice as shit.
13. South Park or Family Guy?
That’s REALLY tough because they are the two best. South Park is way smarter and impressive. But to me, Family Guy is straight up the funniest. So… Family Guy!
14. You have an entire day to do whatever you want. What would you do?
Coffee, hang with friends and family, do a stand-up show, then hit the diner.
15. What movie can you not resist watching if it’s on?
Oh, that’s easy. Swingers.
16. The sports team or teams you’re most passionate about?
Fuck sports. The Mets though. For my dad and brother.
17. Where did you eat the best meal of your life?
It may have been in Houston at some mall. There was a really nice Chinese food place that Tom Arnold, of all people, took me to. The food was unreal. No clue what it was called. Whitney Cummings was there. Ask her.
18. The last movie you saw in a theater?
It’s been so long. I watch stuff at home. Oh wait, it was Parasite. Loved it.
19. Who was your first celebrity crush?
Heather Graham, maybe.
20. What would you cook if Nic Cage were coming to your house for dinner?
Man, listen here. I’d cook my fuckin dogs if Nic Cage wanted to come over. He can have a fried American bald eagle for all I care. I love Nic Cage. Eat up, Nic.
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