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Crypto-billionaire-turned-alleged-felon Sam Bankman-Fried once floated another title for himself: President of the United States of America.

The FTX schemer is currently on trial for defrauding customers by committing wire fraud and money laundering, mismanaging billions of dollars in order to pay off his startup’s debts. On Tuesday, his ex-girlfriend and the former CEO of his failed hedge fund, Alameda Research, took the stand to not only disclose his criminal dealings but to shed light on the hubris of the most infamous name in Crypto at the moment.

According to Caroline Ellison, Bankman-Fried theorized he had a 5% chance of becoming president, a prediction that stunned his ex-girlfriend because the FTX founder had little political experience. Bankman-Fried was so interested in wading into the political arena that he even contemplated giving $5 billion to Donald Trump to ensure he wouldn’t make another run for office. Instead, he allegedly stole $100 million from customer accounts to make campaign donations during the 2022 Midterm Elections in an effort to gain political favor for his company.

Ellison has already pleaded guilty to helping Bankman-Fried defraud FTX customers but on Tuesday, she painted the picture of a bumbling math genius with an overinflated ego who thought he was too smart to get caught and too rich to not be in power.

(Via Forbes)

The Boys spinoff Gen V has already given us characters worth velcroing to our sleeves after a handful of episodes. Those include the occasionally fun-sized Little Cricket, portrayed by Lizzie Broadway, and the blood-bending Marie Moreau, played by Jaz Sinclair. Two other actors, however, portray the same character, Jordan Li, who holds “classic” powers like shooting energy at opponents and, on a more individualized note, is also capable of gender-bending in the blink of an eye.

As seen above, this Asian-American Godolkin University student with a runner-up ranking to enter The Seven cuts an imposing figure. Actually, they cut two imposing figures, given that the show portrays two incarnations of the genderfluid character. This makes Jordan’s newfound relationship with Marie even more celebrated by fans, but also, two different actors gain a chance to shine in this plum role. Who are they?

On the right, London Thor is not only the cast member with the most awesome real-life name but also a Korean-American actress who has been building up her presence in the streaming realm. In addition to roles in You and Never Have I Ever, Thor has appeared in Lady Bird and an arc in Showtime’s U.S.-based Shameless.

On the left, Derek Luh portrays the more indestructible incarnation of Jordan who tends to surface during physical altercations. As well, the Supe tends to greet their parents with this outward physicality. (However, both actors have appeared in romantic scenes with Marie.) Luh’s credits include an arc on Shining Vale as well as appearances on All Rise and Runaways.

As a package deal, Jordan Li can not only kick some serious ass and keep their wits about themselves amid the apparent corruption at God U, but the show’s interpretation of their genderfluidity might be the coolest Supe power in The Boys history.

Amazon’s Gen V streams new episodes on Fridays.

It was hard to make out exactly what was happening at first. The doors at the Theatre at Ace Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles had only been open for a few minutes and Olivia Rodrigo fans were scampering around the venue’s foyer, choosing whether to get in line for exclusive merch, go upstairs for a “matcha experience,” hit up one of the many selfie stations and photo booths, or use the restroom before the women’s lines became untenable (some enterprising young ladies eventually just stormed the men’s room, which seemed very reasonable all things considered). But occasionally, eruptions of noise exploded from within the crowd, the kind of noise usually reserved for when an A-list celebrity is spotted at a show.

After some investigation, the case was solved: videographers were moving throughout the venue, having groups of fans do their best Olivia screams into the camera, reenacting one of the most iconic moments from her recently released and universally beloved sophomore album, Guts. It comes from the album’s first song, “All-American Bitch,” in which Rodrigo follows an offhanded mention of screaming by performing the act, a move less common on pop records but at home among some of her other sonic influences, be it ’90s grunge or ’00s pop-punk.

Toward the end of her hour-long set, she gave the song its proper live debut, but not before discussing the recording of the aforementioned scream in her collaborator Dan Nigro’s garage, and how the many takes left her without a voice. When the time came for her to deliver on that moment, she wasn’t alone, with many in the audience taking the opportunity to sing,… err, scream along. It was catharsis reduced down to its most molecular form. Olivia seemed proud.

The concert, held by American Express as part of their Members Week for a show dubbed “American Express Presents: An Evening with Olivia Rodrigo,” saw the live debut of a number of Guts tunes, along with stories from Rodrigo and Nigro from the recording sessions. Fans were treated to anecdotes about how “The Grudge” almost didn’t make the album, how The Smiths influenced her lyrics, why Nigro wouldn’t order her wine at a restaurant, and the time his baby threw up on Olivia’s face. Amex made the evening feel like more than just a performance with their bells and whistles, including the aforementioned installations and free tacos to all ticket holders upon exiting. And at a mere $25 per ticket with secondary market options disabled, the proceeds from the event were assured to Rodrigo’s new nonprofit Fund 4 Good.

The lasting thought from the show, though, is how ready her fans are to sing these new songs with thousands of their compatriots at Rodrigo’s massive arena tour that will take place across 2024. Over the last couple of years, artists like Harry Styles, SZA, Taylor Swift, and Beyoncé have taken touring to a new level in the public consciousness thanks to everything from post-lockdown IRL yearning to social media’s unique facility for amplification. 2024 will undoubtedly see this continue with artists like Rodrigo, Zach Bryan, and Noah Kahan already breaking ticket sites and seeing entry costs skyrocket. While it is certainly a bummer to see secondary resellers making money off this phenomenon, the flipside is that the feverish demand to see today’s of-the-moment artists speaks to a new era of live music, one that will certainly experience plenty of highs and lows and fixes and evolution as artists try to reach more of their fans in an equitable manner.

This new era is already being felt in just how people interact in live spaces. From Beyonce’s “On Mute” to Taylor’s surprise songs, communal, sharable moments are serving multiple functions, as they provide memories to people in attendance and FOMO to those catching up as they scroll, anticipating their own chance to experience it live and in person. For Rodrigo, it will certainly be the scream, the guttural, raw moment of being as un-pretty as possible that feels in tune with a generation putting aside the need for IG perfection. And if it is anything like Monday night’s concert, it will absolutely be worth it.

Check out American Express Presents: An Evening with Olivia Rodrigo on YouTube, dropping today (10/10) at 5 pm PST.

A decade ago Guillermo del Toro made a big monsters vs. big robots movie. It was called Pacific Rim. It did pretty well — well enough that it got a sequel a handful of years later. That one wasn’t directed by del Toro. That’s fine, because instead he made The Shape of Water, which won him Best Picture and Best Director. But why didn’t del Toro make it? Massive artistic clashes? Some behind-the-scenes drama? Actually the reason is a lot dopier than you’d think.

“We were getting ready to do it, it was different from the first, but it had a continuation of many of the things that I was trying to do,” Del Toro said in a recent interview with Collider (as caught by Entertainment Weekly). “Then what happened is — I mean, this is why life’s crazy, right? — they had to give a deposit for the stages at 5 p.m. or we would lose the stages in Toronto for many months. So I said, ‘Don’t forget, we’re going to lose the stages,’ and 5 o’clock came and went, and we lost the stages.”

Luckily there was a Plan B. Unluckily that didn’t work with del Toro’s schedule: “They said, ‘Well, we can shoot it in China.’ And I go, ‘What do you mean we?’ [laughs] ‘I’ve got to go do Shape of Water.’”

Again, in the end it all worked out for del Toro, though not quite for the Pacific Rim gang. When the sequel (helmed by Daredevil show director Steven DeKnight) came out, it scored so-so reviews and middling box office, effectively killing plans for a threequel. (There was an anime version for Netflix in 2021, though.) It also didn’t exactly get del Toro’s blessing.

“I didn’t see the final movie, because that’s like watching home movies from your ex-wife,” he told Collider. “It is terrible if they’re good and worse if they’re bad, or the opposite. You don’t want to know.”

(Via Collider and EW)

Taylor Swift said it best herself: Karma is God who takes all of her friends to the proverbial summit. So when the universe made it clear that Taylor Swift could never star in a successful movie (Exhibit A, B, C), she decided to take Hollywood’s neck by her perfectly polished fingers and wrangle it until she would get herself a box office hit. So she decided to release a concert movie!

Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour hits theaters this weekend and the movie is already off to a successful start. The concert film is expected to make $150 million to $200 million in its opening weekend. This puts Taylor up there with Barbie, which secured $162 on its opening weekend alongside that other movie. And at two hours and 48 minutes, it’s still shorter than Oppenheimer. And it features no men talking aggressively with intense eye contact!

Swift’s concert film will hit over 8,500 theaters in about 100 countries this Friday, and it’s important to note that the actual tour itself is only halfway done (she just wrapped up the South American leg) meaning we will be enduring another year and a half of this stuff around the rest of the world. So get used to it! And maybe consider acting Swift in like……..a good movie.

As for now, when you Google “Taylor Swift Movie,” a list of her worst career accomplishments is being drowned out by the millions of dollars she is making from her tour movie, so maybe it will all work out in the end. Karma is that guy on the screen, am I right?!!

(Via The Hollywood Reporter)

In today’s pop culture sphere, there is no greater signifier of global household name status than getting your own Funko Pop figure. For instance, the last musician to have multiple Funkos was Snoop Dogg, who even has his own Funko store in Inglewood.

Blackpink certainly fits that bill. They just completed a sold-out world tour and renegotiated their contracts to allow them to pursue a plethora of solo projects that include acting careers and individual LPs. It’s only right, then, that they are the next K-pop juggernaut to receive a collection of Funko Pop figurines, along with a collection of Loungefly backpacks.

The Pops are based on the group’s “Shut Down” video and will come in both the normal Funko Pop Rocks size and keychain sizes. Meanwhile, Loungefly, Funko’s accessories brand which is best known for its pop culture-citing backpacks, is also releasing Blackpink accessories adorned in the group’s brand marks. The “BP” logo is debossed all over the three items, which include a mini backpack, a heart-shaped crossbody bag, and a wallet. They are, of course, the group’s signature colors, with all sorts of cute detailing sure to be appreciated by fans of both the band and the lifestyle brand.

You can find more info about the Loungefly gear here and pre-order your Funko Pops here.

There are, as of now, eight Leprechaun movies. This is either kind of shocking or not shocking at all if you follow horror movies at all. For instance, did you know there were 11 Children of the Corn? (I’ll admit I’ve somehow seen three of them.)

Anyway, Hulu is in the midst of its “Huluween” celebration and the Leprechaun movies are in their spotlight. A couple of weeks ago, to promote this event, I got an email asking if I wanted to talk to Mark Jones, the director of the first Leprechaun movie. I replied, “I do.” When Jones first popped up on my Zoom screen, yeah, I did kind of expect the director of Leprechaun to be smoking an oversized cigar.

Leprechaun is a pretty zany movie. It’s, yes, about a Leprechaun (Warwick Davis) who is mad his gold got stolen. When some foolish people (led by Jennifer Aniston one year before she was on Friends) find his gold, the Leprechaun goes on a murderous rampage in an attempt to get it back. Once the group realizes the Leprechaun just wants his gold back, okay. he can have it. But there’s one problem, Ozzie (Mark Holton, probably best known for playing Francis in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure) accidentally ate one of the pieces so they can’t fully pay the Leprechaun back.

The first Leprechaun was released in theaters in early January of 1993, still up against the 1992 holiday season films like Home Alone 2 and Aladdin, and still managed to gross a little under $10 million. Combine that with its home video rental and … well you get seven more Leprechaun movies and me, here in 2023, writing a feature about it.

Ahead, Jones takes us through how he went from Saturday morning cartoons (I made sure to mention how much I loved his work on Turbo Teen), to shows like The Fall Guy and The A-Team, to directing a movie like Leprechaun. And he tells us how he lucked out by casting Aniston, an unknown actor at the time that the studio didn’t want to cast but Jones knew she had “it.” (Jones was right.)

You made Turbo Teen.

How did you know that? Wow.

Well, it’s on the internet. But I loved Turbo Teen. It was a teenager who could turn into a sports car.

I did that with Joe Ruby at Ruby-Spears, but It’s funny because I go on IMDB and it says, “Turbo Teen, writer of one episode.” They need to put I wrote the pilot. I co-created that with Joe Ruby. I love that show and it’s kind of interesting that it comes up every now and then. I started in animation very young, and then I got into primetime TV, so I had a lot of fun.

How does all that lead to Leprechaun? I feel there’s a disconnect there that I’m trying to fill.

No, there’s a straight connect. I wrote Scooby-Doo and the Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels. I was at Hanna-Barbera before I went to Ruby-Spears. I was writing some Scooby-Doo and I said, you know what I want to do? I want to direct a horror movie. That’s why I got out of television — to actually direct. Because I was a writer, a producer of TV, but not a director. So I wrote a script and I wanted Leprechaun to be like a live-action Scooby-Doo. And if you’ve noticed, there are bright colors. The sets I designed, the kitchens were orange and green and yellow, but even the clothes the kids wore were very bright. And I did that on purpose. I wanted to do a live-action Scooby-Doo, and so that’s why I had the leprechaun on a tricycle and all that.

Yeah, I noticed Mark Holton has kind of a Fred vibe that he’s wearing.

Yeah, exactly. And I still talk to Mark. He’s great. I talk to him all the time. So I went out to specifically create that kind of different sort of horror movie.

I’ve always wondered this with horror movies when you’re casting. Is that the dream to get someone who’s going to be super famous in the future? Because now your film’s always cemented with a very famous actor.

That would probably be Jennifer.

Yes.

I’ve said this a lot, and she’s a sweetheart. And then she went off and did her thing. When she came in the room and she was nobody, I had never heard of her, she had not done really anything.
I remember she did a Ferris Bueller television show?

Yeah, I think they did like six episodes…

She was the Jennifer Grey role. Charlie Slaughter played Ferris Bueller.

Right. And when she came in there was a charisma about her. She walked in the room and I remember, because I was there with my casting director and Michael Prescott, my producing partner, and we both looked at each other and said, “There’s something about this girl.” She was my pick. I had to fight the studio to get her.

Really?

It wasn’t their first pick. And we got her for scale. I don’t think she’ll be upset about me saying that. But it was her first picture that she’s co-starring in. And then after Leprechaun was released, she got Friends. I tell her I’m completely responsible for her success. I tell her that. And then she says to me, “Who is this?”

It’s interesting, in the movie she played the character Tory, a Beverly Hills brat who didn’t want to be on the farm. And her character in Friends also was a rich girl who left her wedding in the pilot and was kind of considered the snobby rich girl whose dad was taking care of her. I’m sure it had nothing to do with this movie, but some people have pointed out that sort of the character was similar to what she played in Leprechaun.

I do always wonder that though. Kevin Bacon is in Friday the 13th. Crispin Glover and Corey Feldman are in Friday the 13th 4. They kind of give these movies an added reason to stick around. I do wonder if that’s on your mind. That maybe you’ll get lucky and cast a future star.

Never thought. I mean, to go in with a basically low-budget movie that was made direct to video that ended up going big theatrical, never did I think that this girl is going to be a superstar and is going to make the movie work. I thought she was the best for the movie. I was happy to get her. No, I was very pleased because I’m sure it helped on DVD and video sales. And people still watch it. But yeah, you can’t go in thinking that. I was just happy that I had a movie to make.

Were you shocked by how reasonably well it did at the box office? All things considered, you were up against Aladdin and A Few Good Men.

Oh, it’s funny you say that. And I’ll say this quickly. We would go to the theaters. I live in the San Fernando Valley. We came out in January and you had to be 17. Ours was R so the kids couldn’t go in. So they would buy tickets to The Muppet Christmas Carol and then go into Leprechaun. And I said, “We’re losing money! And Jim Henson is making all this money from my movie!” So I was pleasantly surprised that the theaters were selling out. And I’m going, I think they got it. The critics killed me. Critics hated the movie in the beginning, but they didn’t understand what we were doing. They were comparing it with Exorcist and this and that.

Yes, very similar movies.

So in any event, I was pleasantly surprised. And then it went to VHS because it had such a big theatrical run. And so it made a lot of money. And then they did number two and three and four and so on.

Did you not want to direct the second movie?

No, I didn’t really. I went off and did a movie called Rumpelstiltskin and that was a bigger budget. And then of course they kept doing them. And at that point, the budgets actually on some of the later ones like three, four, and five weren’t really that big because a lot of them went to video, but they did so well. But I was sort of off doing other stuff. But financially I have an interest every time they make one.

Considering your budget, you wound up with a pretty good cast. Obviously Jennifer Aniston. But also Warwick Davis and we mentioned Mark Holton, who is obviously known as Francis from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure.

I did have a good cast, and cast is critical. I’m still in touch with Mark Holton. And Robert Gorman, the kid, was good.

Yeah, he’s in Forever Young.

I did find Mark because I used him on a Superboy episode when I was in Orlando. I did the first season and second season of Superboy. Syndicated show. Cast was really important and everybody was great and Jennifer and Ken Olin and obviously Warwick. So I got very lucky with cast and the chemistry worked. So I think that helped the movie a lot.

‘Leprechaun’ is currently streaming on Hulu. You can contact Mike Ryan directly on Twitter.

There may not have been a bigger surprise in the NBA last season than the Utah Jazz. While most predicted them to be terrible in the immediate aftermath of the trades that saw Rudy Gobert and Donovan Mitchell leave town, Utah competed every night, saw Lauri Markkanen turn into an All-Star, and despite fading down the stretch, laid the groundwork to be a team that competes in the future.

There won’t be any sneaking up on people this season, and it’s easy to predict that Utah will struggle in the ultra-competitive Western Conference. They did, however, earn the benefit of the doubt last year, and even if they take a step back in the win-loss column this year, it’s hard not to be excited about what’s being built in Salt Lake City.

Biggest Question: How Much Better Can Their Young Guys Get?

Both Markkanen and John Collins will be 26 at the start of the season. Collin Sexton will be 24. A number of guys who you can reasonably expect to have roles on the team — Walker Kessler, Ochai Agbaji, Talen Horton-Tucker — are all 22 or 23. They have three first-round rookies (Keyonte George, Taylor Hendricks, Brice Sensabaugh) who are all 19. Obviously, the team will see what it has with those rookies, but as Markkanen showed last year, Utah under Will Hardy puts guys into an environment where they can grow into the best version of themselves.

Sexton, for example, is a fascinating player to watch. While it’ll be interesting to see Kessler continue to establish himself as one of the league’s most intimidating defensive presences and Agbaji try to build on his close to last year, the Jazz have questions at point guard, both this year and in the future. Sexton, the former Cleveland Cavalier who played in 48 games last year with 15 starts, had an up-and-down season in 2022-23 as he looked to get back up to speed following a torn meniscus the year prior and appeared in one game after the All-Star break. Can he, in year two of a four-year contract, find his form and establish himself as a crucial piece of the puzzle in Utah? If not, can a guy like Horton-Tucker take a step forward as a jumbo playmaker? Can George get up to speed and run the point? Will they have to rely heavily on a grizzled veteran like Kris Dunn?

No matter what, there is plenty of young talent here, and it’s a lot of guys who are not yet (and, in some circumstances, nowhere near) the prime of their careers. With how the team is building towards a future where they will compete for championships, development is the single most important thing to watch this season.

X-Factor: John Collins Refinding His Form

Let’s take a quick trip back to June 20, 2021. The Atlanta Hawks walked into Philadelphia and knocked off the 1-seed in the Eastern Conference in a Game 7, thanks in part to the play of John Collins. He had 14 points on 5-for-6 shooting along with a game-high 16 rebounds, and looked to be a crucial part of what was being built in Atlanta. He cashed in not long after with a 5-year, $125 million contract, and for some reason, it sure seemed like the Hawks spent every moment since then trying to trade him.

Whether it was injuries, a lesser role, or something else, Collins last year had his least productive season since his rookie campaign — his 13.1 points and 6.5 rebounds in 30 minutes per game were the lowest marks since his first year in the league. He shot 50.8 percent from the field and 29.2 percent from three, and had a usage rate of 17.1 percent, all of which were career-lows. As such, Utah opted to take a remarkably cheap flyer on him, acquiring him for the low price of Rudy Gay and a second-round pick.

Obviously, Utah doesn’t need Collins to turn into a guy who goes for 25 points and 12 rebounds a night or anything like that. But the athleticism and ability to stretch the floor that he brings should fit nicely alongside Markkanen and Kessler, he’s under contract for at least the next two seasons, and at his best, he’s a really dynamic frontcourt option. A roll of the dice on a guy like that makes a ton of sense, and as we saw last year with Markkanen, the Jazz have an idea of how to help these sorts of guys take a step forward in their careers. Getting him was the ultimate low-risk, high-reward move.

Only Murders in the Building does a lot of things well. It creates a fun little mystery and drips and drops out clues over the course of the season. It plays to the strengths of its stars — Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez — in a way you’d think would be obvious to every show but is shockingly hit-or-miss out there. It’s become a cozy little relaxing watch in a sea of dark and gloomy and humorless options across the very many streaming services that exist.

But I think my favorite thing the show does well is the way it folds in guest stars. This season alone we had appearances by Mel Brooks and Matthew Broderick as themselves, with the latter popping up to poke a whole lot of fun at himself. But the biggies were Meryl Streep and Paul Rudd, the former who played a struggling actress and murder suspect, the latter who played an egomaniac movie star who was the season’s victim. My god, did it ever look like they were having a blast.

Two things are important to note here:

• The concept of Meryl Streep convincingly playing a struggling actress who flubs lines is brilliant and maybe required the best performance any actor has given this year
• I need everyone to see Paul Rudd’s character absolutely devour a cookie in his dressing room after a day’s worth of stress and fasting broke him

Looking at this guy.

This is what I mean about everyone having a blast. And what I mean about the show using its pedigree and big-name cast to lure in terrific guest stars. And it’s kind of what inspired me to write this list of potential guest stars I think would make for fun additions to the cast either in season four or just going forward, generally.

Three notes before we begin:

• Some of these are maybe reaches, for a variety of reasons, but I got excited and it’s good to have fun
• I am going to rip through each option quickly, with three bullet points under each person, just because we aren’t made of time
• I am very serious about the last item on this list, which I have teased here and put at the bottom in the hopes you’ll scroll through dozens of other lunatic suggestions

I am a professional. Kind of. But I swear some of these are good. Let’s go.

Jon Hamm

Some notes:

• Jon Hamm would be so good on this show
• I like to picture him playing like a goofy version of himself who rents a place in the building while in Manhattan for another project
• Jon Hamm has been guest starring in so many shows and this would be such a Jon Hamm move that I actually had to Google to be sure he wasn’t already in a previous season

Next

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

Some notes:

• JLD has been awesome for like three-plus decades
• Veep is done and she has time
• I want her to be the murderer

Next.

Wesley Snipes

Some notes:

• This one is fun
• Let Wesley Snipes have fun
• He could play like a dude who was on a season of Brazzos with Steve Martin and holds a grudge about something

Next.

Amy Poehler and/or Maya Rudolph

Some notes:

• Tina Fey is already on the show as a cutthroat rival podcaster with blonde hair
• These two are the best and any show could use them
• Maybe just let Maya Rudolph do the voice she does in Big Mouth?

Next.

Walton Goggins

Some notes:

• Walton Goggins has never been bad in anything
• He’s so silly as Baby Billy on The Righteous Gemstones and I think we could put him in a different wig here and make it work
• I still kind of can’t believe how nice he was when I interviewed him

Next.

Phoebe Waller-Bridge

Some notes:

• Yes
• Picture Steve Martin and Phoebe Waller-Bridge in a scene together
• Tell me I’m wrong

Next.

Donald Glover

Some notes:

• Donald Glover is so talented and can kind of do anything but it’s good to remember he got his start being goofy as hell
• I like the idea of him as another rival podcast or maybe a private detective who mucks up the investigation for everyone
• He should grow a mustache for this part

Next.

Tommy Lee Jones

Some notes:

• Tommy Lee Jones going full The Fugitive with Steve Martin and Martin Short
• He’s good at comedy and we know this from the Men in Black movies
• My dad suggested this one

Next.

Aubrey Plaza

Some notes:

• Aubrey Plaza doing her little eye rolls at Martin Short’s antics
• Maybe she plays an old classmate or cousin of Selena’s character
• I would like this a lot

Next.

The Muppets

Some notes:

• Picture Kermit and Miss Piggy moving into an apartment in the building and blammo now the Muppets just exist in this universe
• Or maybe there’s no mention of them ever at all and then bc Statler and Waldorf are up in the balcony for a performance of Martin Short’s musical
• I will keep suggesting we put the Muppets into things until I die or someone takes my internet access away

Next.

Ayo Edebiri

Some notes:

• Ayo is the best
• Let her do whatever she wants
• I would also accept Richie from The Bear, like that exact character just blooped over from another Hulu show

Next.

Jason Statham

Some notes:

• Statham is so good at comedy and rarely gets a chance to show it
• It would be funny to watch like “New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs Comedy Hour” broken up with periodic scenes where Jason Statham kicks someone in the throat and then blows up their house
• This one is just for me

Next.

John Wick

Some notes:

• Not Keanu Reeves
• Like, actually John Wick, on the loose in their building
• They would have so many murders to investigate

Next.

Edi Patterson

Some notes:

• Edi Patterson is so freaking funny
• I have this visual of the team trying to interrogate her and her going Full Chaos Mode and I can’t stop smiling
• She should be in more things anyway so this is as good a place to start as any

Next.

Tim Robinson and Sam Richardson

Some notes:

• Get them on the show
• Yes, it would be weird because Sam Richardson already investigates murders on the also-terrific mystery-comedy The Afterparty
• I do not care

Next.

Rihanna

Some notes:

• Imagine if a future season opens up and someone murders Rihanna — like, actually Rihanna, as herself — and they have to investigate amidst the news coverage calamity
• Get another megastar in there next to Selena Gomez
• Let Rihanna act in a bunch of silly little flashbacks

Next.

Helen Mirren

Some notes:

• Helen Mirren is fun, as we know from Barbie and Red and all of that
• I would like there to be a show that has both Meryl Streep and Helen Mirren in it
• She’s the murderer but she killed someone with a machine gun

Next.

Rhea Seehorn

Some notes:

• Rhea Seehorn rules
• She would be great as an investigative reporter trying to figure out why so many murders keep happening in this one fancy Manhattan apartment building
• RHEA SEEHORN RULES

Next.

Nick Offerman

Some notes:

• Full Ron Swanson mustache
• Doing his little giggles
• Maybe he’s the contractor who is building them a new studio?

Next.

Andy Daly

Some notes:

• Definitely a rival podcaster
• I know I’ve suggested that a lot
• But still

Next.

Ali Wong

Some notes:

• Hey
• Remember how good Ali Wong was in Beef?
• This is a good idea

Next.

Stephen Root

Some notes:

• I have yet to encounter a television show that cannot be substantially improved by the presence of Stephen Root
• He would a great murderer on this show
• Maybe he’s the new building manager and is trying to clean up its image and things go sideways

Next.

Rick Moranis

Some notes:

• Why not?
• We can put Rick Moranis in this show
• There’s nothing stopping us

Next.

Natasha Lyonne

Some notes:

• She would be so good playing off of the three main characters in the show
• In a trench coat, smoking a cigarette, going Columbo Mode
• It’s fun to picture her voice and Martin Short’s voice having a conversation

Next.

Jiminy Glick

Some notes:

• Okay, look
• This was kind of just an excuse to post this highlight reel of Martin Short as Jiminy Glick that I’ve been watching a lot lately, but I would really like to see the podcast get so famous that they start making the publicity rounds and then Martin Short pulls double duty interviewing himself about murder
• I feel okay about making you scroll all the way down for this one

Thank you.

Revivals can be tough. On the one hand, it’s fun to think about how all of your favorite characters from old shows would do if they had access to modern technology, but on the other hand, maybe they actually got more annoying over the years. It’s a tricky balance.

The latest show to jump on the revival bandwagon is Frasier, which will be the second spinoff from the original Cheers character, played by Kelsey Grammer. Even though maybe fans are excited to see the snarky psychiatrist back in action, it seems like the actual show is a little lacking in the “good” department. Here’s what the critics are saying:

Deadline‘s Dominic Patten says that even though it might be the most innovative show on TV right now, it’s…something.

While clearly a subscriber lunge for Paramount+ in this age of streamer contractions, this 10-episode revival is indeed so blatantly a throwback to a very different era of television that to try to taint it as mere nostalgia is to miss the point. A little thinner on top, a little meatier around the middle, and sometimes a bit slower in its sitcom delivery, Frasier 3.0 emerges eternally itself in an ever changing world and media landscape.

From the too loud studio audience laughs, the staging, the set-ups and timing, the lighting, the improbabilities, the in-jokes (Yes, we are listening), and most of the conundrums and tropes the 2023 narrative employs, Frasier the revival strength is being exactly what you would expect if Frasier had never ended in the first place in 2004 after 11 seasons

IndieWire‘s Ben Travers insists that the series is a bit of a letdown:

Far from a catastrophe, the revival is still a disappointment (unless recent experience has taught you to lower the bar all the way to floor) because it so clearly lacks, for starters, the original’s zany energy. Frasier, at its peak, has a remarkably quick wit, deploying a flurry of jokes and quips that undercut the Crane brothers’ pretentious tendencies via their escalating embarrassments. But far more noticeable in its absence is the camaraderie that Frasier inherited in Cheers and came to love in Frasier; the stand-out supporting characters that have not only always been there for Frasier, but that Frasier has relied on to make his life —and his shows— that much better.

Meanwhile, Time‘s Judy Berman was not impressed by the “wilted salads and expired eggs” of the new series:

The tone feels off, too. It’s nice that the new episodes were filmed in front of a live audience, but their laughter, which reads as artificial in 2023, makes the revival feel too much like a kitschy throwback. Frasier’s quest to prove, after a couple of decades as an overeducated talk-show host, that he’s got more substance than, say, Dr. Phil, makes for a decent premise. But his guilt over passing his daddy issues onto the next generation is more of a bummer than a light comedy can support. The show needs more jokes and less earnest emoting, at the very least. Still, I’m not convinced that any amount of tweaking would be enough to justify its existence.

Rolling Stone‘s Alan Sepinwall was unimpressed with the lackluster jokes and the inconsistencies with Frasier’s character:

There are occasions that remind you of Grammer’s genius, like a silently pained Frasier struggling to choose between being loyal to Alan or getting admitted to an elite Boston club. There just aren’t enough of them to compensate for everything else, especially when the show takes such a pick-and-choose approach to all the things we know about Frasier.

Nick Hilton of The Independent says that Grammer does his best in the starring role, even if the content is nothing special:

The fact that there is something to enjoy in this return to the Craniverse is testament to the joys of Cheers and Frasier, not to mention Grammer’s effective turn in the lead role. Little may remain other than a title and an endearing snobbery, but, just like Theseus’s ride before it, the spirit of Frasier remains intact. Not quite seaworthy, perhaps, but just about afloat.

If you want to give it a shot, the series will premiere on Paramount+ on October 12th.