This week on Top Chef, the contestants all traveled to the Getty Museum so that they could become inspired by famous styles of art — Rococo, Baroque, Renaissance, Neoclassical. It proved to be a tough challenge for the contestants, as “crudo” is not generally considered a style of art (yet?). That being said, experiencing beautiful art through the lens of a vanity project museum designed as a tax shelter by a ruthless oil magnate does feel very true to the spirit of Los Angeles. It should’ve included having to steal resources from other parts of the state.

The challenge was judged by a table of snooty hipsters and Ludo Lefevbre, punk rock Frenchman/human Pepe Le Pew. They also chose to include at least one judge wearing a baffling statement hat, which is, again, very true to the spirit of LA. I like how he cut out his own ear holes on the sides, like a bunny rabbit wearing a ten-gallon cowboy hat. Half of living in LA is trying not to comment on someone’s inexplicable, weather-inappropriate hat choice, so nice job on that, producers.

Before all that though, Randall Park and Ali Wong showed up to introduce a fried rice challenge — a guest spot that probably made a lot more sense when this season was originally supposed to air back in the fall, and Park and Wong’s food movie, Always Be My Maybe, was much fresher in our minds. But taking credit for things that were actually produced in the Bay Area like Ali Wong is, again, very true to the spirit of Los Angeles.

RESULTS:

Quickfire Top: Karen, Kevin, Eric.
Quickfire Bottom: Jamie, Nini.

Elimination Top: Malarkey, Voltage, Melissa, Eric.
Elimination Bottom: Lee Anne, Stephanie, Jamie, Karen

POWER RANKINGS

13. (-4) ((Eliminated) Jamie Lynch

AKA: Midnight Olive Oil. Aka Gravel. Aka Suicidal Ten-dad-cies.

Jamie whiffed on his giant spam cubes in the quickfire (too bad, the crispy shallots were a good idea), which probably would’ve worked great at half the size at which he cut them. You really want to maximize the surface area of Spam, not the taste. After the elimination challenge, he ended up going home, yet again, on account of serving dusty, dry-ass chicken breast. Just an absolute spackling paste of chicken mush, mealing around the judges’ mouths like a tumbleweed.

Jamie briefly made us believe that he’d learned something from his initial run on Top Chef, using his sous vide to cook the chicken breast instead of a sticky grill, but somehow he managed to screw up even sous vide chicken.

Not to Friday morning quarterback here, but I think I see the problem: choosing to cook fucking chicken breast. Be honest with yourself: do you really think you’re going to win a cooking competition cooking chicken breast? The best goddamn chicken breast I’ve ever eaten would still lose in a walk to, hell, a BLT. Or any other part of the chicken. And that’s before Jamie managed to serve his without the jus, which to a Frenchman is like serving a baguette without a striped turtleneck.

12. (-1) Lee Anne Wong

AKA: Frazzle. Aka Loud Mom. Aka Queasy. Aka Lee Anne Tigertelli.

A fried rice competition sounded like a gimme for Lee Anne, a Chinese-Hawaiian mom. But the fact that she didn’t end up in the top three AND ended up in the bottom of the elimination challenge (again) feels like more than enough to put her in the bottom of this week’s rankings. Honestly, I’m not sure how she’s even still here.

This week, she chose to make a duck egg with duck, as a riff on the Madonna and child. Which sounded like a good enough idea, if only she hadn’t paired it with (*deep breath*) two separate beet purees, a black garlic sauce, poached apples, and a bread and celery root puree. Madonn’, work smarter not harder! How many times have you said to yourself “Gee, this is good, but I think it’d be better with five more sauces?”

11. (+1) Lisa Fernandes

AKA: Salty. Aka Grimes.

In this week’s elimination challenge, Grimes cooked “chipotle-braised brisket with tons of dried fruit, habanero red onion, tomato salsita with lots of chilis, and crispy carrots on top for crunch,” which I guess does get points for baroque-ness. She really baroque the mold with that one. And thank God, no one should ever use that mold. Lisa or Lee Anne feel like stone cold locks to go home next.

10. (+3) Stephanie Cmar

AKA: C-Monster. Aka Underdog.

As always, you can count on the C-Monster for great ideas — Nashville fried frog legs spiced with red hots was a stroke of genius. In the elimination, she made tortellini with mortadella, something I literally made myself just last week (it was good, yo). Even the nude bellies in Rococo art reminding her of tortellini made more sense as an inspiration than just about anyone else’s dish. “Mortadella tortelloni with umami nage” also sounds like a sweet scat line. It’s got a very “RC Cola and-a, moon pie!” rhythm to it. “Mortadella tortelloni with-a, umami nage!” More dish names should be syncopated if you ask me.

But once again, the C-Monster couldn’t execute. She got dinged for undercooked pasta and just like that, a clever concept went pissing down her leg. That’s what you call an al-don’te. Between her chewy pasta and shithouse flatbread, maybe the key for Stephanie is to stop attempting high-risk starches. Remember the shrimp and corn, C-Monster. Repeat it to yourself as a mantra, like Tommy Boy and the chicken wings.

9. (-1) Jen Carroll

AKA: Calamity Jenn

Calamity Jenn continues to be this season’s most invisible contestant, which is disappointing as I find her to be one of the most compelling characters. Very on-brand that Calamity Jenn was hanging with the boys while the girls were having a heart to heart in the other room. Other than that, her screen time was mostly mispronunciation based.

Jenn’s quickfire dish went uncommented upon and she failed to impress guest judge Ludo with her fish, who said Eet eez just feesh een a sows! Trés boreeng! Wow, I can’t believe someone said that about a Jenn Carroll dish. And a Jenn Carroll fish dish at that! Jenn Carroll is the fucking Kobe Bryant of fish dishes, how dare you. Don’t you know she used to work for Eric Ripert??

I like to imagine that Ludo and Eric Ripert have some kind of extremely French blood feud, like one time Eric Ripert kicked Ludo’s snail in the dirt, and Ludo took it out on Calamity Jenn.

8. (-3) Karen Akunowicz

AKA: Good Witch. Aka Glenda. Aka Aunt Kitty. Aka Rosie The Triveter

I just don’t know what the hell to do with Karen. She’s up, she’s down, she seems like a favorite and then she fails to execute on a chicken thigh (a staple food, in my house). Karen was top three in the quickfire and then made a braised chicken thigh with braised chicory, which definitely sounded delicious but apparently wasn’t. I’m forced to drop her down in the rankings, even if “being able to translate paintings into food” isn’t necessarily high on my list of crucial chef skills. It should be illegal for someone with that good of a cat eye to fail at an art challenge.

7. (+1) Brian Malarkey

AKA: Grandpa Fancy. Aka Shenanigans. Aka Squirrelly Bird. Aka The Emperor.

Shenanigans started this episode with a vadouvan-spiced forbidden rice in the quickfire and finished it with a vadouvan haloed halibut in the elimination. Hey, man, save some vadouvan for the rest of us, will ya?

I don’t know if Shenanigans truly understands renaissance art — his fashion sense is certainly more baroque — but of all the dishes, his was the one that most looked like “art.” It was enough to earn him a surprise top-four finish. It’s hard to know how much stock to put in that though, whether it’s a harbinger of things to come or just an example of even an extremely spazzy clock being right twice a day. Tom said Shenanigans has a shot in this competition as long he continues to edit himself. And, well, I’m not quite ready to give the benefit of that to the guy who doesn’t even edit the thoughts he says out loud.

6. (even) Nini Nguyen

AKA: Broad City. Aka Quipz. Aka Bolo.

Nini immediately connected with Ali Wong, on account of both being sassy Vietnamese-American women in sumptuously patterned tops and fashionable eyeglass frames (do I hear buddy comedy?). Unfortunately, she chose to make fried rice with watermelon, which didn’t work out so well. On account of, ya know, water generally not mixing very well with crispy things.

In the elimination challenged Nini managed to work being from New Orleans into her “rebirth” themed gumbo for Renaissance, topping it with a veil-like rice tuile. Which… I dunno, seemed like a pretty good idea to me. But not so according to nose ring judge, who called it “not very beautiful.”

How DARE you. I will fight anyone who is mean to my beloved Nini. Nini always puts me in a good mood and I think she got a raw deal this week.

5. (+5) Eric Adjepong

AKA: Ghana. Aka Thesis. Aka Uncle Rico. Aka Kanye West Africa.

Thesis went weird and was rewarded in the quickfire, landing in the top three with his peanut butter and jelly (inspired) fried rice. That sounded weird as hell, but if anyone’s going to surprise me with peanut butter it’s probably the African chef. (Wait no, if anyone’s going to surprise me with peanut butter, it’s going to be your mom).

It was a much-needed high finish for Eric after two sub-par episodes, and he kept it going with a top-four finish in the elimination challenge. He made a poached fish over buttermilk xantham gum (yeah I dunno either, man) that somehow qualified as “austere,” in the neoclassical style. Gail Simmons even said Eric’s dish made her “feel something,” which made me feel something.

It was a solid result. But I also think Eric had a natural advantage this week on account of he’s been to grad school, the ultimate training ground of bullshitting about art, and justifying your own bullshit through art. Game recognize game.

4. (-1) Kevin Gillespie:

AKA: Hops. Aka Oops All Kevins. Aka Bachelor Fried Rice.

Bachelor Fried Rice over here won the dang quickfire despite (allegedly) not cooking much Asian food, a second win in a row for Kevin. He was clearly on a hot streak, and then he lived all of our dreams by using his immunity from the quickfire to totally mail it in in the elimination challenge. His lamb loin looked half-assed as hell, and honestly? You gotta respect it.

Use your vacation time, people. Kevin is an inspiration.

3. (-1) Gregory Bourdet

AKA: Kravitz. Aka Hepcat. Aka Lids.

Lids, being the coolest cat around, mostly succeeds by keeping it chill, cooking food that makes sense and not doing anything stupid. He doesn’t cook dumb shit that’s never going to win, like Jamie, or get so wrapped up in a challenge that he forgets the food, like Lee Anne, or attempt high-risk, easily fuck up-able starches like Stephanie. This week he made a miso-spiced beef short rib. Which sounds like… something you’d eat, right? Yep.

Gregory doesn’t overcomplicate things, he just hangs around, laying down that silky bass groove. I would kill to have half this guy’s chill.

2. (+1) Melissa King

Speaking of obnoxiously well put together people who exude preternatural chill, there’s Melissa, the female Gregory. Melissa seemed like a top seed from the beginning and still does, getting the win in this challenge. Melissa made a “Michelin star deesh, I would put eet een my restaurant,” according to Judge Ludo, a lobster wonton in charred allium sauce. That sounds delicious, and I don’t even know what allium is. (I believe the British call it al-you-mini-yum?). [It’s fancy chef wording for garlic. -ed]

In my mind, Melisa, Gregory, and Bryan are basically in a dead heat right now.

1. (even) Bryan Voltaggio

AKA: Flatbill Dad. Aka Bry Voltage. Aka Kyle Shanahan. Aka Linkin Clark Griswold.

Bryan Voltaggio, everyone’s dad, was clearly inspired by all the art this week, saying things like “Gosh!” “Wow!” and “Jeez that’s a heck of a painting.”

He went on to cook a halibut with smoked sweet potato puree so good that he landed in the top four despite it not being baroque at all. I’m actually pretty pissed that there was no cutaway of Bryan saying “well you know what they say, if it ain’t baroque don’t fix it, ha ha ha.” Bry-Voltage continues to remind me of Peyton Manning here — exuding a kind of natural authority and seeming almost too dorky to screw up. Bryan Voltaggio’s natural, thoroughly unremarkable competence is what I want in a president.

Vince Mancini is on Twitter. Read more of his cooking commentary and mom jokes in UPROXX’s Cooking Battles. For past Top Chef Power Rankings, go here.

Joining the growing list of artists, which includes Cardi B and Kehlani, who have been forced to delay their upcoming releases due to the coronavirus, Gunna has had his upcoming album, Wunna, shelved for the time being as a result of the virus. Looking to keep the anticipation for the album high following the last month’s “Skybox,” he shared his new single, “Quarantine Clean.”

Bringing Young Thug into the mix, the two Atlanta-born rappers join forces yet another collaboration, adding on to their laundry list of songs together. Produced by Turbo, the song stands as a well-timed released aimed a bringing a bit of attention towards the coronavirus and self-isolation.

Young Thug has been a bit vocal with his frustrations with the coronavirus and its effect on the music industry, noting on Thursday that he was losing millions of dollars as a result of the virus. Thug continued to air out his frustrations on the track with Gunna rapping, “Why would a disease come around when you getting rich,” adding onto the line, Thug also made some rather insensitive comments about sexual assualt accusations saying, “Seems like when you getting money rape come easy for a b*tch.”

Press play on the video above to listen to “Quarantine Clean.”

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

TikTok has become a prominent force in the music industry as a growing number of artists have taken to the platform to promote their latest singles. Last week, Curtis Roach shared an official video and full-length song with Tyga based off his viral TikTok video, “Bored In The House.” K Camp’s “Lottery (Renegade)” achieved extreme success on the app thanks to its accompanying dance routine. Placing his surfboard right on the TikTok wave, Drake joins the mix with his latest single, “Toosie Slide.”

Prior to the song’s release, Drake sent the track over to Toosie, the famed Atlanta dancer in which the song is named after, to debut it to the world. Paired with a dance routine, Ayo & Teo (who released their viral track, “Rolex,” in 2017), Hiii Key, and Toosie instructed viewers on how to do the “Toosie Slide.” Following the song’s lyrics, listeners are instructed to put their “right foot up, left foot slide/left up, right foot slide.” A couple of days after the first previews of the song were shared, Drake revealed that the song would be released by the end of the week.

The song serves as Drake’s second release of the year following February’s “When They Say When/Chicago Freestyle.” The song also arrives days after he shared the first pictures of his two-year-old son Adonis.

Press play on “Toosie Slide” above.

If you want to watch G-Eazy‘s new, retro-styled video for “Still Be Friends” featuring Tory Lanez and Tyga, I regret to inform you that you won’t find it here. In fact, if you do want to watch it, you’ll have to hit one of the internet’s most notorious websites: PornHub. No, we aren’t linking to it — I’m sure you know the way.

That’s right: The new video is available only on PornHub, and for good reason — the video’s cast includes a plethora of “Vixen Angels,” the official brand ambassadors for the popular Vixen site. The faces may or may not be familiar to you, but the girls dance and cavort around the three rappers as they perform the track in the “Vixen Villa,” a parodic reference to the Playboy Mansion.

The video’s concept pays homage to the mansion’s heyday in the 1970s, from the rappers’ stylings — G-Eazy rocks a suitably creepy mustache, while Tory gets into the turtleneck-and-medallion look — to the grainy filter that gives the video the look of old documentary footage from the time. Compton rapper YG also makes a cameo appearance, but you likely won’t be looking out for him in the first place.

While G-Eazy’s partnerships with both Vixen and PornHub may seem like nothing more than an excuse to frolic with semi-naked women, as it turns out, there’s a strategic aspect as well. With P-Hub’s traffic on the rise thanks to coronavirus quarantines, it’s an inventive workaround to maximize the number of eyeballs on the clip. G-Eazy is also helping out in other ways, providing free meals to Bay Area kids for the rest of the month.

You can check out the safe-for-work version of the video above. The other one can be found on Vixen’s Pornhub page.

YNW Melly is currently awaiting trial on two counts of first-degree murder in a South Florida jail, and now he has more bad news: The rapper’s team revealed that he’s tested positive for the novel coronavirus.

The news was shared in an Instagram post, with a caption that reads, “He’ll be filing a motion for restricted release in hopes of better care due to any jails not being prepared to treat this new virus. He hopes for your support and to recover soon #prayformelly send positive energy to him please.” The news arrived as the Boward Sheriff’s Office, the Florida city where Melly is currently awaiting trial, revealed that two inmates in the jail tested positive for COVID-19.

Melly’s name adds to a growing list of celebrities who have recently contracted the virus. Yesterday, Founders Of Wayne bassist Adam Schlesinger passed away following complications from COVID-19, and just a few days ago CNN’s Chris Cuomo revealed that he had tested positive for the coronavirus.

The news arrives mere weeks after YNW Melly’s “Suicidal (Remix)” was updated with a new verse from the late Juice WRLD. Nearly two weeks later the song was paired with a matching video in which neither rapper appears.

Last Updated: April 2nd

There’s nothing better than bingeing some good scary movies on Netflix on a dark, stormy night. From ghosts to vampires and zombies just about every morbid fantasy that your demented mind can conjure has representation. We’ve watched the best horror movies on Netflix streaming right now, and here they are, in their beastly, blood-curdling glory. It’s perfect for that late night movie binge to keep you wide awake all the way through 2020.

Related: The Scariest Shows On Netflix Right Now

It Comes At Night (2017)

Run Time: 86 min | IMDb: 7.4/10

Writer/director Trey Edward Shults followed up his unnerving family portrait in 2015’s Krisha with a look at another family under the most desperate of circumstances. After an unknown illness has wiped out most of civilization, a number of threats — both seen and unseen — come for a family held up in their home out in the wilderness. It’s a subtle, dream-like tale that stars Joel Edgerton and Christopher Abbot as two patriarchs intent on keeping their families safe, no matter the cost.

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Scream 2 (1997)

Run Time: 120 min | IMDb: 6.1/10

Surprisingly, despite internet leaks and constantly rewritten scripts, this sequel to Wes Craven’s cult slasher flick performed even better than its predecessor, especially with critics. The story treads along the same lines as the first: we’re still following Sydney Prescott (Neve Campbell) around, this time as she navigates college life. But when a copycat killer begins donning Ghostface’s disguise and stalking her, she’s forced to turn to some old friends for help. The whole world feels more lived in, and Craven’s not afraid to take shots and exploit sequel clichés, which makes this a terrifying, at-times hilarious, follow-up.

As Above So Below (2014)

Run Time: 93 min | IMDb: 6.2/10

Before Ben Feldman played a lovable know-it-all on Superstore, the guy was surviving a terror-filled jaunt through the catacombs of Paris in this horror movie. Feldman plays George, a reluctant sidekick to Scarlett (Perdita Weeks), a young alchemy scholar and his former girlfriend. Scarlett convinces George a few others to venture into the famous Paris underground in order to find the fabled philosopher’s stone (Harry Potter kids should know all about this thing, we’re not explaining it here). What they find instead is basically Dante’s Inferno come to life as they face down cults, demons, ghosts, and all manner of horrific beings. Let this be a warning, children: Nothing good happens this far below street level. Nothing.

The Perfection (2018)

Run Time: 90 min | IMDb: 6.1/10

Allison Williams, who’s become something of a scream queen after her work in Get Out, continues her horror track record with this thriller about a gifted musician who befriends the talented student who replaced her. Strange happenings begin to occur, events that sabotage the young girl, but as terrifying as this story is, there’s absolutely no way you’ll be able to predict its ending.

Rampant (2018)

Run Time: 121 min | IMDb: 6.3/10

This South Korean period zombie flick is just weird and gory enough to stick with you long past its end credits. The basic premise follows a clash between an exiled prince and a minister of war set to the backdrop of a zombie plague, but the horror elements spring up while zombie hordes attack villages and during creepier, nerve-wracking moments between its main characters.

Murder Party (2007)

Run Time: 120 min | IMDb: 5.9/10

Jeremy Saulnier is someone who knows how to make a story of thrilling and brutal violence. Director of Blue Ruin and Green Room, he manages to make his stories gripping and tense with slight touches of offbeat humor. Well, for his first feature, that offbeat humor is just as extreme as the violence. An awkward guy finds an invite to a random Halloween party and decides to attend, unbeknownst to him that he’ll be the murdered main attraction for a group of eccentric artists. It’s a slow build toward its inevitably over-the-top and bloody conclusion, but it’s a fun ride for a low-budget gory comedy.

Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

Run Time: 137 min | IMDb: 8/10

Mia Farrow stars in this iconic horror classic that’s probably influenced every other film on this list. The movie follows Rosemary Woodhouse (Farrow) and her husband, Guy. They’re a pair of newlyweds who move to a new apartment where they’re quickly surrounded by strange neighbors and even more worrisome happenings. When Rosemary mysteriously becomes pregnant, she becomes paranoid that the people around her, including her husband, are out to get her.

The Craft (1996)

Run Time: 101 min | IMDb: 6.3/10

Robin Tunney and Neve Campbell star in this cult classic about a group of teenage girls who use their burgeoning powers to cause all kinds of trouble. Tunney plays Sarah, the new kid at a Catholic prep school who falls in with a trio of outcasts led by Nancy (a deliciously unhinged Fairuza Balk). The girls are witches, and Sarah’s latent abilities make the spells they cast even more powerful. Hexing the popular kids, brewing love potions, and summoning Satan soon follow before Sarah realizes Nancy’s brand of occult just isn’t for her.

The Girl With All The Gifts (2016)

Run Time: 111 min | IMDb: 6.6/10

Despite a cast that includes Gemma Arterton, Paddy Considine, and Glenn Close, this unusual, post-apocalyptic film got a bit overlooked during its brief theatrical release. It’s best enjoyed without knowing too much of the plot. Suffice it to say that Melanie (Sennia Nanua), the girl of the title, isn’t quite what she seems, and there’s a reason that she, and others her age, are kept in a secure military facility. But the best trick of the film, thanks in large part to Nanua’s winning performance, is the way its innovations go beyond just putting twists on a familiar genre and, instead, making us question where our sympathies ought to lie.

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Green Room (2015)

Run Time: 95 min | IMDb: 7/10

When a punk rock group accidentally witnesses the aftermath of a murder, they are forced to fight for their lives by the owner of a Nazi bar (Patrick Stewart) and his team. It’s an extremely brutal and violent story, much like the first two features from director Jeremy Saulnier (Blue Ruin and Murder Party), but this one is made even tenser by its claustrophobic cat-and-cornered-mouse nature. Once the impending danger kicks in, it doesn’t let up until the very end, driven heavily by Stewart playing against type as a harsh, unforgiving, violent character.

The Witch (2016)

Run Time: 92 min | IMDb: 6.8/10

Robert Eggers’ Sundance hit attracted some of the oddest complaints directed at any film in recent years when some disgruntled audience members suggested it wasn’t scary enough. Maybe they were watching a different movie? Set in colonial New England, the austere film follows a family outcast from their strict religious community and trying to make it on their own at the edge of some deep, dark woods. It essentially takes the witch-fearing folklore of the era at face value, watching the family disintegrate under the insidious influence of a nearby witch. It’s a slow-burn horror movie, light on shocks, heavy on unease, and thematically rich in ways that only become apparent later.

Insidious (2010)

Run Time: 103 min | IMDb: 6.9/10

Patrick Wilson stars in another horror flick on this list, this time as the father of a little boy trapped in a coma who’s been possessed by evil spirits. Rose Byrne plays his wife, and while the story itself is a bit muddled, the premise is solid nightmare fuel. Really, is there anything more terrifying than a demon child?

Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil (2010)

Run Time: 88 min | IMDb: 7.6/10

This indie comedy has quickly become a cult classic, turning familiar scary movie tropes on their heads in bloody and hilarious ways. Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine star as two bumbling-yet-well-meaning hillbillies who get pulled into a nightmare scenario when a group of horny coeds think they’re trying to kill them. In a series of events that escalates in violence, Tucker and Dale try to do the right thing while managing to stay alive in the process. As one of the best horror comedies, it’s a hidden gem waiting to be discovered by those looking for off-the-beaten-path hilarity.

Shutter (2004)

Run Time: 97 min | IMDb: 7.1/10

This Thai horror film follows a young man named Tun and his girlfriend, Jane, who accidentally run over a young woman after a party and are haunted by her spirit. Hauntings and horror go hand-in-hand, but this film digs deeper into the supernatural trope by revealing a surprising, gruesome connection between the woman’s ghost and the film’s protagonist. We won’t spoil anything here, but let’s just say there’s a reason this death follows this guy wherever he goes.

Candyman (1992)

Hush (2016)

Run Time: 81 min | IMDb: 6.6/10

Mike Flanagan, who directed Oculus and Ouija: Origin of Evil, expertly directs this simple tale of a deaf woman being menaced by a masked (and later unmasked) killer in her remote home. This is nothing you haven’t seen before, but Flanagan brings real panache and visual energy to a film that could have easily felt redundant in the hands of a lesser filmmaker.

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The Autopsy Of Jane Doe (2016)

Run Time: 86 min | IMDb: 6.8/10

Succession’s Brian Cox and Emile Hirsch star in this horror mystery about a father-son coroner team attempting to identify a Jane Doe who was harboring all kinds of dark secrets. When a corpse is brought into a small-town coroner’s lab, he and his son begin to experience supernatural phenomena. Tommy (Cox) and Austin (Hirsch) try to escape the lab but quickly realize that they’re dealing with something far more dangerous than a dead body while demonic spirits, old curses, and witches come to life.

Child’s Play (1988)

Run Time: 87 min | IMDb: 6.6/10

Tom Holland’s ’80s horror flick managed to take a benign children’s toy and transform it into a waking nightmare. The film stars Catherine Hicks as Karen Barclay, a single mother who gifts her son Andy a doll he’s been wanting. Unfortunately for Andy, that doll is possessed by the soul of a serial killer and very quickly, Chucky then begins to wreak havoc on the family.

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Gerald’s Game (2017)

Run Time: 103 min | IMDb: 6.7/10

Stephen King’s 1992 novel transpires mostly in one isolated lake house’s bedroom where its protagonist, Jessie, lies bound to a bed after her husband dies in the midst of a sex game. That makes it a tough story to film, which may explain why it took 25 years to get turned into a movie. But the wait was worth it: director Mike Flanagan delivers a resourceful, disturbing adaptation anchored by a great Carla Gugino performance (with some fine supporting work from Bruce Greenwood). Forced to find a way out of her situation, while confronting her own past, Gugino’s Jessie is made to go to extremes, which leads to, among other things, one of the squirmiest scenes in recent memory.

Under the Shadow (2016)

Run Time: 84 min | IMDb: 6.9/10

This Iranian horror flick manages to tie in relevant world events with a darker story of demonic possession. The film follows Shideh, a former medical student and mother trapped in her home during the bombings of Tehran with her daughter, Dorsa. The pair are soon haunted by a djinn, a malevolent spirit who can possess a human by taking what’s most important to them. For Dorsa, it’s her doll, for Shideh, it’s a medical textbook her dead mother gave her. The two fight to survive the bombs and this evil spirit, and you’ll be fighting to get to sleep after the nightmares from this one begin

Veronica (2017)

Run Time: 105 min | IMDb: 6.2/10

After losing her father, young Veronica (Sandra Escacena) and two classmates attempt to contact the other side with a Ouija board during a solar eclipse. Something more sinister breaks through, though, as Veronica is haunted by a dark presence everywhere she goes. Even though it has just been released in 2018, it’s already been called one of the scariest movies ever made. While that is certainly open for debate, what Veronica does do is excel phenomenally in the cliche horror bits every viewer has seen a thousand times over, such as mishandled Ouija use, frightening entities that only the protagonist is privy to, and twisted dreams. Based on a true story, the film relies on the strong performance of newcomer Escacena, highlighted by her haunting expressions of terror and anguish.

Life After Beth (2014)

Run Time: 89 min | IMDb: 5.6/10

Aubrey Plaza and Dane DeHaan star in this horror comedy about a guy named Zach, who’s mourning the loss of his girlfriend, only to discover she’s come back to life. Plaza stars as Beth, the dead girl revived, who begins exhibiting strange behavior, eventually going into full-blown zombie mode while her devoted boyfriend Zach (DeHaan) tries to manage her mood swings and her pesky craving for human flesh. John C. Reilly and Molly Shannon play Beth’s parents, who hilariously try to cover-up their daughter’s current undead state, and though things go off the rails in the final act, watching Plaza play a moody, angst-ridden walking corpse is one hell of a good time, even if it does give you nightmares.

The Evil Dead (1981)

Run Time: 85 min | IMDb: 7.5/10

Another ’80s flick, this Sam Raimi creation launched the director’s career and has since become a cult classic. The story follows a group of college students vacationing in an isolated cabin in a remote wooded area when they find an audio tape that somehow releases a legion of demons and spirits. Most of the group suffer varying degrees of possession which leads to gory mayhem (hence the film’s NC-17 rating).

Creep (2014)

Run Time: 82 min | IMDb: 6.3/10

One of the better found-footage movies to come down the pike in Paranormal Activity‘s wake is this creepy gem about a videographer (director Patrick Brice) who answers a strange Craigslist ad from a man (Mark Duplass) who requests to be followed around with a camera for 24 hours. There are a few points late in the narrative where suspension of disbelief becomes an issue (a not-atypical problem for the genre), but if you can look past that, you’ll be treated to a very scary turn by Duplass and a supremely-unnerving epilogue.

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Creep 2 (2017)

Run Time: 80 min | IMDb: 6.4/10

(Spoilers for Creep🙂 What could have very well been a stand-alone character exploration in 2014’s Creep is heightened in Creep 2, which sees Mark Duplass’ chameleon-like killer seeking a different kind of self-portrait. Burned out on his string of murders, Aaron reaches out to a woman who’s looking for her own kind of story by meeting and filming the lonely people she meets online. Instead of a wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing path the killer normally follows, he tells the woman what he is off-the-bat and what he wants: An ending to his journey. With all his cards (seemingly) on the table — and her hiding some of her own — it’s an even more fascinating tale than the original.

Train To Busan (2016)

Run Time: 118 min | IMDb: 7.5/10

Zombie movies have been done to death, brought back to life, and repeated a few more times. But that doesn’t mean there still aren’t entertaining stories to be found in the genre. Train To Busan doesn’t bring anything exceptionally original to the walking undead, but it’s no less of a thrilling ride. An overworked dad is riding the rails with his neglected daughter when a Z-word outbreak strikes, causing savagery from corpse and living alike. Its fast-moving, contorted foes are genuinely freaky in the movie’s cramped setting, making the story feel like a zombified Snowpiercer. It’s a fun action flick with a slightly heavy-handed but solid emotional core that’s unsurprisingly getting an English remake.

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The Invitation (2016)

Run Time: 100 min | IMDb: 6.7/10

After back-to-back big studio bombs, Karyn Kusama returned to her scrappy indie roots with this contained, brilliantly suspenseful study of the darkness that can arise when people don’t allow themselves to feel. The Invitation isn’t a perfect film, but Kusama does a lot with the scant resources she had to play with here, and you have to appreciate her willingness to tackle grief so directly in a genre that tends to have little time for genuine human emotion.

The Bar (2017)

Run Time: 102 min | IMDb: 6.4/10

A varied group of people is stuck in a bar after a man is gunned down outside. As the paranoia spreads and they turn on one another, they discover a mysterious sickness could be the culprit. It’s a bottle-type plot that has been done before — locking a bunch of frenzied folks in a cage and let instincts take their course — but this Spanish horror comedy injects its own dark humor and keeps the answers to a minimum, making an entertaining story that unfortunately favors the “dark” over the “comedy” in its final act.

The Ring (2002)

Run Time: 115 min | IMDb: 7.1/10

Naomi Watts stars in this horror mystery from director Gore Verbinski, playing a journalist who investigates a videotape that seemingly causes the death of anyone who watches it. Watts plays Rachel, whose sister dies exactly one week after watching a mysterious video. When Rachel watches the same video and begins to experience paranormal hauntings, she uncovers the terrible family secret fueling the horrible deaths. It’ll make you swear off VHS players for life.

Apostle (2018)

Run Time: 130 min | IMDb: 6.3/10

A man (Legion‘s Dan Stevens) travels to an island to infiltrate a brutal cult in the hopes of saving his kidnapped sister. As the group’s leaders close in on discovering his identity, the dark secrets of the island start to present themselves. Written and directed by The Raid: Redemption director Gareth Evans, Apostle is a tense, beautifully shot thriller that doesn’t even seem like a horror film from the get-go. Stevens provides another icy, powerful performance alongside Michael Sheen’s turn as the leader of the harsh cult. It’s certainly a highlight among the Netflix original films.

Recent Changes Through April 2020:
Removed: Paranormal Activity
Added: The Girl With All The Gifts

Keeping true to its word, Disney+ has updated The Simpsons fans on how soon to expect episodes of the classic animated series be made available in its original aspect ratio. The fledgling streaming service had promised a fix by 2020, and according to a latest tweet, fans should be good to go by the end of May.

When Disney+ launched in November, Simpsons fans were quick to notice that older episodes looked noticeably off. Like most television series before the advent of flatscreen TVs, the show originally aired in a 4:3 ratio. To avoid showing black bars on each side of the picture, Disney+ used versions of the show that were cropped into 16:9 format, which cut off visual gags and led to characters looking stretched and distorted in certain scenes as shown below:

In Disney+’s defense, the cropping issue also occurred when FXX started airing The Simpsons marathons, and it’s believed the streaming service simply imported those versions after acquiring Fox. However, Disney was quick to respond to fan reactions, and within days of launch, it promised to offer viewers a choice of aspect ratios in a statement to The LA Times:

“We presented ‘The Simpsons’ in 16:9 aspect ratio at launch in order to guarantee visual quality and consistency across all 30 seasons. … Over time, Disney+ will roll out new features and additional viewing options. As part of this, in early 2020, Disney+ will make the first 19 seasons (and some episodes from Season 20) of ‘The Simpsons’ available in their original 4:3 aspect ratio, giving subscribers a choice of how they prefer to view the popular series.”

While May pushes the limit of “early 2020,” it’s understandable that Disney has had its hands full, as the pandemic has forced the company to scuttle release dates for major blockbusters like Black Widow and Mulan while halting production on a variety of upcoming projects headed for theaters and Disney+.

(Via Disney+ on Twitter)

Amid the AIDS epidemic in 1983, the FDA banned gay and bisexual men from donating blood in an attempt to stop the spread of the virus. Back then, little was known about the disease and there were no quick tests to determine if someone had it.

These days HIV testing can be done in as little as 15 minutes and the disease can be detected as little as 18 days after initial exposure. The disease is also no longer a death sentence. Those who get proper medical treatment can live as long or almost as long as those who are HIV negative.

In 2015, the FDA lifted the lifetime ban for gay and bisexual males and reduced it to any men who had homosexual sex within the past year.

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For many, these blood donation bans seemed to stem from homophobia.

Although HIV is more prevalent among gay and bisexual men, heterosexuals also engage in high-risk sexual behavior. But they were only banned from donating blood if they had sex with a prostitute, accepted payment for sex or injected drugs.

via Attitude / Twitter

Now, given the need for blood during the coronavirus crisis, the FDA has made big changes to its blood donation rules. On April 2, the FDA announced it had shortened the period of gay-sex abstinence from 12 months to just three.

“To help address this critical need and increase the number of donations, the FDA is announcing today that based on recently completed studies and epidemiologic data, we have concluded that the current policies regarding the eligibility of certain donors can be modified without compromising the safety of the blood supply,” the notice says.

“As a result of this public health emergency, there is a significant shortage in the supply of blood in the United States, which early implementation of the recommendations in this guidance may help to address (even though the recommendations in this guidance are broadly applicable beyond the COVID-19 public health emergency),” the memo says.

The new ruling also reduced the ban on donations from women who have had sex with a man who has had sex with a man to three months as well.

via Instinct / Twitter

The new policy also reduces the 12-month deferral to people who’ve had tattoos to three months and the lifetime ban for those who’ve exchanged sex for money and accepted money for sex to just three months.

President Trump is on board with the decision which is surprising given his lackluster record on LGBT rights.

“President Trump wants those who wish to donate blood and for those who accept the donations to be able to do so safely,” White House Deputy Secretary Judd Deere said via email to the Washington Blade. “Today’s decision is driven by health and science. The White House supports the Commissioner on this action.”

Sarah Kate Ellis, the CEO of GLAAD, celebrated the change but believes more has to be done.

“This is a victory for all of us who raised our collective voices against the discriminatory ban on gay and bisexual men donating blood,” Ellis said.

“The FDA’s decision to lower the deferral period on men who have sex with men from 12 months to 3 months is a step towards being more in line with science, but remains imperfect, Ellis added. “We will keep fighting until the deferral period is lifted and gay and bi men, and all LGBTQ people, are treated equal to others.”

At a recent press conference, after his brother Chris was diagnosed with COVID-19, New York governor Andrew Cuomo kept reiterating two sentiments: “We’re all in this together,” and “This virus is the great equalizer.”

I understand the sentiment. I’ve said and written the “We’re all in this together” line several times myself over the past few weeks.

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And in one sense—an important sense—it’s true. This pandemic is impacting the entire planet like nothing we’ve seen in our lifetimes. No one is untouched by it in some way. Anyone, rich or poor, can get sick and die from this virus. In that sense, it unites us as human beings, and I hope it will awaken us to our essential oneness.

But Cuomo was wrong on the second point. The fact that this is an equal opportunity virus doesn’t make it “the great equalizer.” The coronavirus pandemic doesn’t equalize anything. In fact, it merely highlights and magnifies our existing inequalities.

I’ve been thinking lately about the sinking of the Titanic. Those 2,240 passengers and crew members were on that boat together. Everyone was a part of the fear and the tragedy as it sank.

They were all in it together. No one escaped the terror. They were all touched by it.

But they were not touched by it equally.

Gov. Cuomo seized the historical moment with a rousing speech to the National Guard: This is a ‘rescue mission’

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Passengers aboard the Titanic ranged from some of the wealthiest people on Earth to third-class steerage passengers, who were mainly working-class immigrants. And during the voyage, the third-class passengers had to stay in their designated area of the ship, which was gated off from the top three decks where the wealthier passengers hung out. Ship stewards could open the steerage gates in an emergency, but otherwise, they stayed closed.

In the chaos of the ship sinking, some of those gates never got opened, which prevented some third-class passengers from getting to the deck with the lifeboats. Those folks drowned trapped in their assigned place, the only place they could afford, without even a fighting chance of survival.

The fact that they were “all in it together” didn’t change the structures in place before the tragedy—structures that directly impacted their fate on that ship.

Of course, as we know, there weren’t enough lifeboats for all of the passengers anyway. Barely half, in fact. Having an adequate number of lifeboats would have made the first-class top deck look “cluttered,” which the wealthy ship owner didn’t want for his wealthy passengers. Besides, the ship was supposed to be “unsinkable.”

And so it was that the economic inequality clearly delineated in the ship’s voyage played out in its sinking as well.

Because they were already on the upper decks, wealthy passengers got to the lifeboats first. Some were lowered into the ocean and rowed away from the ship before their boats were even full.

Despite the standard “women and children first” rule of saving people at sea, 52 out of the 79 children from third-class died in the sinking—about the same percentage as first-class men.

Overall, 61% of first-class passengers, 42% of second-class passengers, and 24% of third-class passengers survived.

Some might say, “Well of course fewer third-class passengers survived—they were farther from the lifeboats,” and that’s exactly the point. The wealthier passengers had an advantage from the get go. The poorer passengers had farther to go, and some of them were cut off completely.

The Titanic passengers were all in that boat together, but that didn’t mean they were equally impacted by its sinking. And we will see the same impact of inequality play out in this pandemic as well.

It’s true that wealthy people aren’t immune from the virus, and some will die. But they still have an advantage from the start. Wealthy folks have access to the best medical care and the ability to afford it. For goodness knows what reason, the wealthy appear to be able to get tested for the virus even without showing symptoms, while the average American has a hard time getting a test unless they are ICU-level ill.

Poor people are starting at a disadvantage, as they are a) more likely to have underlying health conditions, b) less likely to seek medical help early over fears of not being able to afford it, and c) more likely to work in the vital-but-low-paying service industries we are now relying on to feed us, keep our grocery stores and hospitals clean, and transport our food and garbage, putting them at higher risk of exposure.

Wealthy nation offers concrete rectangles to people without homes during pandemic

Shaun King/Instagram

So yeah. We’re all in this together. But that doesn’t change the fact that our vast economic inequality means this pandemic will affect people differently. This will be true both here in the U.S.—where 1 in 9 Americans in our “booming” economy were living below the poverty line—and around the world, where 1 in 3 do.

We learned from the Titanic that disasters don’t play out equally, even if they impact everyone. We will learn the same thing with this crisis, and with every tragedy that follows until we make some fundamental changes in our economic systems.

If we want to claim that we’re all in this together, let’s make sure we have enough lifeboats for everyone and do something about the gates that keep people trapped in the lower decks before this ship sets sail again. Since we’ve clearly hit an iceberg and will need to rebuild the economy anyway, perhaps we can purposefully build it in a way that works for all, not just those on top.

Smart little life-improving finds.

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