The “most monstrous comet ever known” is careening towards Earth.

Now, before you panic! at the disco / office / Taco Bell drive-in / wherever you spend your Mondays, you should know that it’s not expected to collide into this big blue marble we call home. University of Pennsylvania astronomers Gary Bernstein and Pedro Bernardinelli, the pair who discovered the comet and published their findings in The Astrophysical Journal Letters, learned “the comet’s trajectory has it swinging between Uranus and Saturn in 2031,” according to the Daily Beast:

Its close approach in 2031 will be a monumental time to study the comet’s chemistry and reveal what our neck of the woods was like before there were planets zipping around. “One of the best things about this comet is that we’ve got a while until it makes its closest approach to the sun, so we’ve got years to study how it brightens up as its surface gets exposed to the sun’s warmth,” [Amy Mainzer, an astronomer and comet expert at the University of Arizona] said.

But hypothetically speaking, let’s say the comet, which measures to 60 to 100 miles in length, was on a collision course with Earth, couldn’t we blow up? It worked in Armageddon. Nah, says astrophysicist / professional buzzkill Neil deGrasse Tyson.

“So, if you look in movies about this sort of thing, what they want to do is blow the sucker out of the sky,” he said while appearing on CNN earlier today. “We’re very good at blowing stuff up because we have no end of weaponry to do this. But that’s not the wisest path. All engineering calculations tell us if you blow something up, while we’re good at blowing it up, we’re not as good knowing where the pieces will end up. So, it’s safer and it’s more controlled to deflect an asteroid from harm’s way.”

If we can’t trust the scientific accuracy of a Michael Bay movie, what can we trust?

You can watch Neil deGrasse Tyson’s appearance on CNN above.

(Via the Daily Beast and Raw Story)

One of DC Comics’ flagship titles is stepping up in a huge way for LGBTQ representation as the publisher’s current Superman will come out as bisexual in its latest issue. To bring everyone up to speed, the publishing company’s Superman is no longer Clark Kent. That mantle has been passed to his son, Jon Kent, who’s now headlining his own series, Superman: Son of Kal-El.

Introduced in July 2015, Jonathan Samuel Kent has been through some huge shifts in the past six years. After surviving a major multiversal event that “fixed” the shattered DC Universe, Jon became Superboy and often teamed up with the Damian Wayne Robin as the “Super Sons.” While he started out as a pre-teen, Jon did something that rarely happens in comics: He actually aged. After a mission into space with his grandfather, Jor-El, Jon returned to Earth as a 17-year-old despite only being gone for a few months.

With his powers almost fully developed, his father has entrusted Jon with protecting the planet as Superman. And, now, the character is about to make his boldest move yet. Via IGN:

“Over the years in this industry, it probably won’t surprise you to hear I’ve had queer characters and storylines rejected. I felt like I was letting down people I loved every time this happened” writer Tom Taylor tells IGN. “But we are in a very different and much more welcome place today than we were ten, or even five years ago. When I was asked if I wanted to write a new Superman with a new #1 for the DC Universe, I knew replacing Clark with another straight white savior could be a real opportunity missed. I’ve always said everyone needs heroes and everyone deserves to see themselves in their heroes. Today, Superman, the strongest superhero on the planet, is coming out.”

The move follows an announcement in August that Tim Drake, who made a splash in the ’90s as the third Robin, was coming out as bisexual in an issue of Batman: Urban Legends. That editorial choice was met with a round of support from fans, and we’re sure the Jon Kent news will go over equally well with only a few obnoxious, but minimal detractors.

(Via IGN)

The cartels are poppin’ in Narcos: Mexico Season 3, and Netflix’s trailer promises a fiery flourish to the franchise. This shall be the final season of the spinoff to the Pablo Escobar-centered beginnings of Narcos, and the installments have continued to their high on their own supply (in a good way). However, the most recent season finale saw the freshly incarcerated Félix Gallardo (Diego Luna) quietly and ominously warning Scoot McNairy’s Walt Breslin of the circus that the fledgling DEA had inadvertently unleashed. Yep, the U.S. had taken down the Guadalajara Cartel, but several plazas swiftly sprang up like hydra heads, going full-cartel in the aftermath. As Félix put it to Walt, “You’re going to miss me,” and that was no joke.

We get a good look at all the jousting cartels in this trailer (El Chapo’s all up in the Sinaloa business, and the Tijuana, Juarez, the Gulf are all going) with Scoot’s mustache positioning itself amid gunfire (including from a bazooka) and explosions, set to the tune of Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun.” And like the recent teaser, this trailer sports a magnificent tagline: “THE FINAL BLOW.”

No subtlety there. Here’s the season synopsis:

Set in the 90s, when the globalization of the drug business ignites, Season 3 examines the war that breaks out after Felix’s arrest. As newly independent cartels struggle to survive political upheaval and escalating violence, a new generation of Mexican kingpins emerge. But in this war, truth is the first casualty – and every arrest, murder and take-done only pushes real victory further away…

Yeah, all of those drug lords who previously agreed to co-exist and “prosper” in the Season 2 finale were full of it. Also of importance: a new baddie will be portrayed by Bad Bunny (Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio), and remember this (from a Season 1 finale moment): “Rock and roll never forgets.”

Narcos: Mexico Season 3 streams on November 5.

The best new hip-hop this week includes albums, videos, and songs from Don Toliver, Lute, and more.

Friday saw the releases of Cordae’s “Super,” Joyner Lucas’ “Late To The Party,” Tyla Yaweh’s “Hand Up,” Nicki Minaj’s “Boyz,” and Mick Jenkins’ “Contacts,” along with the releases listed below.

Here is the best of hip-hop this week ending October 8, 2021.

Albums/EPs/Mixtapes

Atmosphere — Word?

The Minnesotan backpack rap duo has yet to take a significant break since 2018, churning out a new album every year since. This year’s entry features contributions from Aesop Rock, Evidence, MF DOOM, and more.

Benji. — Smile, You’re Alive

The Spillage Village member picks up on his solo album where the group left off last year, with a joyous, introspective, and dextrous debut. Obviously, a strong theme running through the project is gratitude for life changes — including the ones that took place in the past 12 months.

Don Toliver — Live Of A Don

Toliver’s third album arrived with plenty of fanfare, as he sought to deliver on the promise that fans have seen in his since his 2018 debut. Life Of A Don is a vibey but shallow adventure that makes for great smoke session background music.

Lute — Gold Mouf

The Dreamville rapper has been patiently waiting for his turn back at-bat since 2017, when he dropped his debut, West 1996, Pt. 2. He’s had years of growth since then, as well as an increase in stature thanks to his role on Dreamville’s Revenge Of The Dreamers III, combining into a thoughtful, emotive album that genuinely impresses.

Flee Lord & Roc Marciano — Delgado (Deluxe)

Adding five new tracks to the August underground favorite, the deluxe edition of Delgado delivers even more of the gritty, sample-heavy New York trap talk that has become both rappers’ signatures.

Sleepy Hallow — Still Sleep? (Deluxe)

Brooklyn native Sleepy Hallow adds a whole new album’s worth of songs to his June album, getting even more creative with quirky, unexpected samples that expand on the drill sound.

Singles/Videos

AzChike & Rucci — “Depend On Me”

The LA underground scene continues to thrive with the release of Rucci & AzChike’s Kourtesy Of Us mixtape. “Depend On Me” is another standout.

Dave B — “Ego Trip” Feat. Rexx Life Raj

Two of my favorites on a smooth, soulful track backed by noodling electric guitars and highlighted by their deft lyricism equals an automatic entry.

Dave East & Harry Fraud — “Just Another Rapper”

It should be clear by now that Dave East is more than “just another rapper,” but just in case it wasn’t, he delivers another standout from his collaborative project with Harry Fraud, Hoffa.

Lakeyah — “Check” Feat. Moneybagg Yo

Milwaukee rapper Lakeyah supports her new Gangsta Grillz project with a video for one of the album’s best tracks, bringing in Memphis favorite Moneybagg for a timely assist.

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

The Ted Lasso Power Rankings are a weekly analysis of who and/or what had the strongest performance in each episode. Most of the list will feature individual characters, although the committee does reserve the right to honor anything from animals to inanimate objects to laws of nature to general concepts. There are very few rules here.

Season 2, Episode 12 — “Inverting the Pyramid of Success”

HONORABLE MENTION: Higgins (tricky situation here because every bone in my body wants to include him in the top ten just to post the GIF of him holding the dogs but I still find it too funny to keep him out, and the rascal in me always prevails); Jamie Tartt (I like that he’s grown as a person but still wears the ICON hat); Isaac (well-versed in intellectual property laws); Heather Locklear on Melrose Place (a sneaky salty bitch); Mae (a good egg); Will Kitman (give him Nate’s job); Colin (I did not know he had the violent streak in him until he called for a Code Red on the leaker, but it’s always the quiet ones); London’s premier all-female dog breeder Suzi Campbell (spinoff WHEN); Jan Maas (truthteller); Rupert (King Sleaze); British tabloids, generally (tip of the cap for “Panic at the Lasso”): Dr. Sharon (bailed on the team and a troubled coach right before the biggest game of the year)

10. Nate (Last week: 7)

Hoo boy. Let’s talk about it.

The thing with Nate is that there’s a piece of him on the inside that’s empty. Think of it as a crater created by the father that never showed affection or pride toward him no matter what he did. And there’s a hole at the bottom of the crater, too, so it’s not a matter of just filling it once. He needs it filled constantly, every day, through validation and appreciation and credit. And if whoever filled it last does not stay vigilant about topping it off, then he’s going to turn on that person and blame them for the crater being empty. This is not a great analogy. I’m not entirely sure a leaky crater is even a thing that exists.

But you get it, I think. Ted showed Nate something resembling parental support and then Nate wrapped his arms around that tightly and then Ted moved on to deal with other aspects of his life and job and took his laser beam of attention with him. That’s why Nate zipped in that low-blow about Ted belonging back home with his son. Nate felt that. It hit a little too close to home, right in the squishy parts. This is his supervillain origin story. He’s gone full Joker now. The new team he coaches wears all black, as if it wasn’t all clear enough. This is officially a thing.

(The thing with Roy didn’t help. He should not have planted a kiss on Keeley like he did, for a number of reasons, but Roy brushing it all off as an innocent mistake after being ready to plant Jamie in the ground like a carrot probably did a number on the part of Nate that feels inadequate and spits at its own reflection in the mirror. Nate needs therapy very badly. I’m actually kind of furious Dr. Sharon missed all this.)

Which brings us to the final scene and, yes, the reveal that he’s coaching Rupert’s team, a situation that appeared to be in the works dating back to the whispering at the funeral, at least. This show has never really had a villain, or even a legitimate antagonist. Rebecca was trying to sabotage the team for, like a minute. Jamie was kind of a prick for a while. But there was no real opposing force out there beyond Ted’s own anxiety and personal issues. This will be interesting and new. It has big Mighty Ducks energy the more I look at it.

Although that analogy doesn’t really hold up either. Ted was not a teen soccer prodigy who became a lawyer and returned to coaching as part of a court-appointed community service plan. I’ll work on this before next season. I’ll need to. Things are going to get weird.

9. My sweet prince Dani Rojas (Last week: Unranked)

While I am very happy for Dani that he overcame his penalty kick phobia in the final moments of the biggest game of the year, putting the dead bird in his past with the help of a regal new doggie mascot and repeating his mantra of “football is life” once again, I think I am most happy for him about the thing where he has a television in his refrigerator.

I am not exaggerating here. Do a little thought exercise if you doubt me. Picture this refrigerator getting delivered to his house and installed. Picture his face when the screen lights up for the first time. Picture him watching… I don’t know, I’m seeing cartoons for some reason, as he pours milk into his cereal.

This is living right here. Dani Rojas is doing great.

8. Trent Crimm, Independent (Last week: 9)

It’s funny because last week I was furious at Trent for abandoning his ethics to burn a source and now I’m furious at The Independent for firing him over it. The lesson here is that there’s no pleasing me.

Anyway, I am now fascinated by Trent’s next step, whatever it ends up being. Like, I’m more interested in this than whatever happens to Richmond going forward. Part of me wants him to start an investigative TikTok full of hard-hitting journalism presented via memes. Another part of me wants him to become a world-class surfer and pop up once a season to check-in, all tan and relaxed and pulsating with good vibes. Most of me just wants him to be happy. I love you, Trent Crimm.

7. Rebecca (Last week: 10)

Toughest ranking on the list. We go to the bullet points:

• Her best friend is starting her own business and will no longer be working in the building and available for midday heart-to-hearts on the couch
• Her slimy ex bought a rival club and hired away her team’s strategic mastermind
• Her on-again, off-again relationship with an employee — adorable in practice, problematic on paper — remains complicated by his decision to stay with the club

And yet, despite all of that… it felt like a win for her? Maybe it’s because the team made it back to the Premier League after one year of exile. Maybe it’s because I’m just feeling all warm and fuzzy today and decided to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Let’s not examine it any further. Sometimes it’s okay to just accept a good thing and move on.

So… moving on!

6. This dog (Last week: Unranked)

If this dog does not return next season — and I’m talking about a minimum of one appearance each episode, preferably on the field but even more preferably in the home of a player who finds a lifelong friend through the process of doggie adoption, and I’m thinking mostly about Isaac here because a) I think it would be fun, and b) I want Isaac to get way into dog grooming with those magical clippers of his — so help me God I will burn down a building.

5. Ted (Last week: 5)

Good for Ted, mostly. He handled the article about his panic attack as well as anyone could, and he led his team back from the brink of obscurity, and he confronted Nate a little about, you know, all of that. On paper, just weighing the pluses and minuses, this one looks like a squeaker of a win for him.

But I worry. I do. I worry because Ted takes things hard underneath that mustache. The Nate situation is going to stick with him. And even beyond a personal level, he’s now lost his tactical mastermind, the one who drew up all the strategies that filled in the massive gaps of his soccer knowledge. That’s not ideal. Nor is the fact that he’s been running this team for two seasons and does not appear to have learned anything beyond the basic rules of the sport he is paid handsomely to coach. Buy a book, my dude. Or borrow one of Beard’s. Come on.

I’m sure he’ll be okay. Probably. Eventually. It could get a little hairy, though. Maybe he and Trent Crimm can go on a road trip together to blow off some steam. That could help. And I would like it. Release it as an hour-long special between seasons. This is a good idea.

4. Sam (Last week: 2)

I think we all knew or at least strongly suspected that Sam was staying. It would have been weird, even just on a practical level, to ship off one of the show’s most important players and have him lead a team on another continent. Still, it was comforting to have it confirmed. And that is all I have to say about that, because it is now time to discuss Sam Richardson again.

What a champion. Just never misses. That evil turn upon getting rejected by Sam was a thing of beauty from beginning to end. The words, yes, the threats about burning and defecating and all of that, of course, the strangling of a mannequin, very much. But this is where I lost it.

I need to know more about this. Everything, if possible. How much of it was written in and how much was Sam Richardson just riffing. It’s delightful. Imagine a grown man doing that in your place of business. It would be all you talk about for weeks.

I’ll be sad if this is the last we see of him as this character. He’s the best. But if it is our final go-round with him on this show, I mean, defiling a mannequin during a childish tantrum is a heck of a way to go out.

3. Keeley (Last week: 3)

We should all take a second at some point and consider the rocket-like trajectory Keeley has been on. At the beginning of this show, she was kind of arm candy for Jamie, a glamour model who dated athletes and filtered a sizable chunk of her personality through that experience. Now she’s a full-on business dynamo and public relations powerhouse who is getting written up in glossy magazines and turning down six-week vacations to stay at home and prepare to start her own company.

That’s… cool. Kind of. I still cannot support the idea of skipping a six-week vacation to stay at home and work, just on principle. But I also do not have a statue of a bright pink jungle cat in my office (yet), so it’s safe to say Keeley and I are in different places right now, personally.

We do agree on the thing in the screencap, though. That’s a solid foundation to build any friendship on.

2. Roy (Last week: 6)

Back to the bullet points:

• I love that Roy’s version of forgiveness — in this case, forgiving Jamie for professing an undying love for Keeley — involves shouting the eff-word and storming out of a room
• The fact that he shouts “WHISTLE” instead of blowing a whistle will never not be funny to me
• “It hurt my… feeling” is maybe as close to a perfect line Reading as you’ll ever see on television

I do worry a little bit about Roy on vacation by himself for six weeks, especially while half of England is professing its love for his suddenly very successful girlfriend. And I also worry about the coaching staff without Nate’s tactical genius. Like, does Roy draw things up now? Can you picture Roy at a whiteboard explaining formations and strategies? I, for one, cannot.

But still, good for him. The arc of personal growth he’s on has him bending closer every day to my big picture goal for him: hosting a Dr. Phil-style self-help daytime talk show. It would be riveting television.

1. Coach Beard (Last week: 1)

Just a solid dude all-around. Tells Ted he doesn’t know why people are being weird on the street and then, blammo, we see he has the tabloid in his pocket. Sniffed out Nate’s treachery and made sure to check on his buddy before running off and smashing Nate with a mallet, like a cartoon, which he wanted to do so badly. Got in this great line about Ted’s mustache. Everyone could use a Coach Beard in their lives. The world would be a much better place. We’d have a global hula hoop shortage, probably, but that’s a bridge we can cross when we get to it.

The greatest.

One of the greatest examples of how culture in the United States is shaped by colonization is the fact that Native American foods feel “ironically foreign” to most people who live on what was originally indigenous land.

This observation was made by Sean Sherman, aka “The Sioux Chef,” an Oglala Lakota chef who was raised on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota. Sherman grew up in one of America’s poorest communities and when he was 13, got a job washing dishes at a local steakhouse.

This experience in restaurants created a lifelong affinity for cooking that he moved to Minneapolis, Minnesota to pursue.

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After mastering French and Japanese cuisines he had an epiphany: “Just all of a sudden, I realized that there was no Native foods. I just realized the other absence of indigenous perspective anywhere in the culinary world, nothing that represented the land we were actually standing on,” he told PBS Newshour.

Even though he was born on a reservation, traditional Native American foods weren’t an important part of his diet growing up. He was raised on processed foods and government supplemental fare which he attributes as one of the leading causes of health issues such as obesity, heart disease and type 2 diabetes that many Native Americans face.

Sherman set out to better understand indigenous cooking by researching food systems and learning from elders, historians, and ethnobotanists.

“What were my Lakota ancestors eating and storing away? How were they getting oils and salts and fats and sugars and things like that?” he asked himself. “So it took me quite a few years of just researching, but it really became a passion.”

He eventually compiled his research into a book, “The Sioux Chef’s Indigenous Kitchen” which won the coveted 2018 James Beard Award for best American cookbook.

Sherman along with his partner in life and business, Dana Thompson, continued their mission to reclaim Native American food by offering catering through The Sioux Chef and the Tatanka Truck.

They also created the Indigenous Food Lab, a nonprofit that works to increase access to Native American foods.

“For Indigenous people who went through intense assimilation, we lost a lot of our food culture,” Sherman told Food and Wine. “But we’re at a point now where we can reclaim it and evolve it for the next generation. To be able to share culture through food will be really healing.”

This summer, Sherman opened his first brick-and-mortar restaurant, Owamni, situated in downtown Minneapolis in an area that Native Americans have known as Spirit Island. The restaurant features indigenous dishes that are free from colonial ingredients such as wheat flour, sugar, pork and chicken.

Instead, diners feast on a decolonized menu featuring wild rice, nixtamalized corn from Mexico, bison, lake fish, dandelion, blueberries and corn ash.

Sherman is making his mark on Minnesota, but his work is spreading across the globe through Facebook and Instagram which he uses for activism and to share Native American history.

Sherman used Facebook to fight back against an incorrect Fox News report that called for a massive bison cull at Grand Canyon National Park.

He started a fundraiser that earned over $10,000 to help distribute Indigenous Home Meal Kits directly to families in need around the Minneapolis/St Paul area.

On Instagram, he stood with Standing Rock.

He also shared a powerful picture of his great grandfather who fought at Little Big Horn.

The Sioux Chef’s work online and in the kitchen are all part of the same goal, to return Native American food and culture to the forefront of American society.

“The bigger goal is to eventually grow the Indigenous Food Lab so we can help train, educate, and support Indigenous kitchens all over the United States,” Sherman said.

“We believe that there should be Indigenous restaurants everywhere because no matter where, we’re on Indigenous land,” Sherman says. Owamni will “help showcase further how Indigenous food fits into the American scene,” he says. “You can’t tell the story of American food while dismissing the Indigenous history of it all.”

Why not celebrate Indigenous People’s Day by cooking one of The Sioux Chef’s delicious recipes? Here’s how to make braised bison and root vegetables.

How To Make Cedar Braised Bison | Chef Sean Sherman | The Sioux Chef’s Indigenous Kitchen

www.youtube.com

Britney Spears has shown off her diversity over the years: Aside from her music career, she has also dabbled in acting. Now she’s getting ready to enter the literary world, too, as she took to Instagram over the weekend to reveal that she’s working on a novel.

Spears seems at least somewhat far along in the planning stages, as she shared a detailed overview of the book, which is about a girl who was murdered and her ghost. Spears explains:

“I’m writing a book about a girl⁣ who was murdered … yet her ghost gets stuck in limbo because of trauma and pain and she doesn’t know how to cross over to the world she use to know !!!! After being stuck in limbo for three years, she is a ghost who thrives off of her reflection in her mirror for existence!!!! She has no one she can trust but something happens and she figures out how to cross over to the world where her family is !!!! Coming out of the limbo she has a decision to make … greet the same people who murdered her or create a whole new life !!!! She no longer needs her mirror … she found a portal by citing certain prayers constantly that give her the insight and gift to not be scared anymore and come out of limbo … but what I will leave to the IMAGINATION is what she does when she crosses over …… besides learning to write her name again !!!!⁣”

Given the story’s themes of family, trauma, and living in a compromised state, some fans took to the comments to make connections between the plot and Spears’ personal life. One commenter wrote, for example, “This is the story about a girl named Britney.” Another said, “Thats a beautiful way to communicate how you feel. You can do it.”

Check out Spears’ post below.

After the internet lost its mind over the supremely non-Italian Chris Pratt being cast as Mario in the upcoming animated film of the same name, the actor has been having fun messing with fans of the iconic video game character. This time around, Pratt posted a new video on Instagram, which he touted as an exciting new preview of Mario.

“Amazing first look at Super Mario Brothers,” Pratt wrote in the caption. “This is going to be epic.”

As you can clearly see, the clip is obviously not from Mario, but instead, a cringe-worthy edit of the final scene in the first Guardians of the Galaxy film. While not the slickest mash-up, it’s pretty hilarious because of its awfulness. Particularly the use of Mario’s “Mamma Mia” catchphrase, which is as random as it is dark.

While Pratt’s casting caused huge waves amongst very protective Mario fans, he will be working with heck of a voice cast. Just check out all of this talent that Nintendo announced including the original Mario voice actor, Charles Martinet:

Chris Pratt as Mario
Anya Taylor-Joy as Peach
Charlie Day as Luigi
Jack Black as Bowser
Keegan-Michael Key as Toad
Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong
Fred Armisen as Cranky Kong
Kevin Michael Richardson as Kamek
Sebastian Maniscalco as Spike
Surprise cameos from Charles Martinet

As for what Pratt’s Mario voice will sound like, he promised fans on the night of the casting reveal that he’s still working on it, and he’ll share it with them when it’s ready. We don’t want to get carried away here, but it sounds like he’s going method on this one.

If anyone sees Chris Pratt crawling through sewer pipes, leave the man be. He’s perfecting his art.

(Via Chris Pratt on Instagram)

If you still feel like “sourced” bourbon is somehow automatically bad, you need to step out of 2005. The idea of sourced whiskey being inferior has been so thoroughly debunked that even suggesting as much is passé. Here in 2021, sourced juice makes up many of the most sought-after and beautiful whiskey expressions on the market. In fact, some of the most beloved and awarded bottles of bourbon whiskey in the past decade have been from master blenders and masters of maturation who’ve pulled amazing barrels from the abyss.

David Carpenter, Master Blender at Redepemtion, puts it this way: “As a chef, I wasn’t growing the beef or carrots or oysters I used. But I was drawing the absolute best products I could to create the best dish that I could. That’s what I’m doing when I source my whiskey.”

That’s a good start but there’s some nuance that’s worth shading in. Bib & Tucker — famously sourced from a very prominent but unnamed Tennessee distillery — has been laying down their own juice for years now. That being said, their much-sought-after ten-year expression is still a few years out from being completely own-make. Belle Meade — which was sourced by Nelson’s Green Brier in Nashville from MGP of Indiana — is now contract distilled and aged by Bardstown Bourbon Company in Kentucky. Still, that MGP juice is what you’ll primarily find in bottles at the moment.

We know, it’s a lot to parse. To get you started, we’re calling out ten really freaking good bottles of sourced juice that we love to drink. We’ve ranked them based on taste alone — whether or not you can find or afford these bottles is none of our business. If you want to try any of these yourself, click on their prices!

Also Read: The Top 5 UPROXX Bourbon Posts Of 2021

• The Best Bottles Of Bourbon Whiskey For Under $20, Ranked
• Our Favorite Bourbon Whiskey From Every Price Point Between $10-$200
• All 19 Brands From The Buffalo Trace Distillery, Ranked
• Here’s Who Won Our Big Barrel Proof Bourbon Whiskey Blind Taste Test
• The Best Bourbon Whiskeys To Drink Neat, From $50 On Up

10. Belle Meade Single Barrel

ABV: 54.65%

Average Price: $89

Source: MGP of Indiana

The Whiskey:

This expression is all about the prowess of the team at Nelson Green Brier. Each of these barrels is hand-selected for its beauty and then bottled at cask strength to let that barrel shine through in the finished product.

Tasting Notes:

The nose opens with deep vanilla that mingles with hints of dark chocolate sugar cookies with a touch of mint. The palate centers the creamy vanilla while adding in a cinnamon bark vibe with notes of black pepper and floral honey moved into the background. The end is long-ish and carries more of that vanilla cream while that cinnamon becomes slightly chewy with a dried choco-mint tobacco buzz on the tip of the tongue.

Bottom Line:

This is a stellar single barrel for a fairly accessible price point. I like having fun with this juice and mixing it into Manhattans and old fashioneds. But it’s also a perfectly suitable sipper with a single rock.

9. Bib & Tucker 10-Year-Old Small Batch Bourbon

ABV: 46%

Average Price: $85

Source: Undisclosed Tennessee Distillery

The Whiskey:

Bib & Tucker is another classic example of what great blending can do with sourced juice. The Tennessee whiskey is a marriage of ten-year-old whiskeys aged in the lowest char barrels available, allowing more direct contact with dried wood rather than black char. Those barrels are blended and then proofed down with soft Tennessee water.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a sense of vanilla bean (pod, seeds, essence) up top with hints of spicy chewy tobacco, dry oak (almost pine), and a distant note of fresh corn husks. The palate really holds onto that velvety vanilla as the corn husks dry out and notes of orange-infused dark chocolate mingle with that spicy tobacco, which starts buzzing on your tongue. The end is long-ish, has touches of that dry pine, and holds onto both the vanilla and dried corn husks.

Bottom Line:

This is pretty f*cking tasty and definitely complex. You’re going to need to give it time and water to really plumb the depths of the pine and choco-citrus, but it’s worth the effort. This is also, for me, the sweet spot on Bib & Tucker’s small but dialed-in line.

8. Jefferson’s Ocean Aged At Sea Cask Strength

ABV: 59.8%

Average Price: $84

Source: Undisclosed

The Whiskey:

Jefferson’s Ocean is an experiment in finishing that’s pretty unique. The blenders pull in six to eight-year-old whiskeys sourced from four Kentucky distilleries. They marry those barrels and then re-barrel the whiskey, load them onto a ship, and sail those barrels around the world for almost a year.

The best of those barrels are married and bottled at cask strength with no additional fussing.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a clear crème brûlée vibe on the nose with touches of orange zest, cinnamon toast, slightly singed marshmallow. The taste dives into salted caramel notes with hints of Almond Joys covered in dark chocolate next to a savory fruit edge. That fruit turns figgy as the end fades slowly, hitting on spicy tobacco warmth and a final touch of fresh mint.

Bottom Line:

While this one will be a little harder to find, it’s worth checking out. If you do find it, take your time, open it up with water or a rock, and dig in to find those velvety flavor notes.

7. Bulleit Bourbon 10

ABV: 45.6%

Average Price: $49

Source: Undisclosed Kentucky Distilleries

The Whiskey:

This is classic Bulleit Bourbon that’s aged up to ten years before it’s blended and bottled. These barrels are hand-selected to really amplify and highlight the classic flavors that make Bulleit so damn accessible in the first place.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a lot going on with butter and spicy stewed apples, maple syrup, Christmas cakes full of nuts and dried fruit, and a hint of savory herbs all pinging through your olfactory. The palate brings about smooth and creamy vanilla with plenty of butter toffee, sourdough crust, more X-mas spice, cedar bark, and a hint of dried roses. The finish is long, warming, and really embraces the toffee and spice.

Bottom Line:

While Bulleit does have its own, huge distillery these days, this juice is still sourced and a damn fine example of what the Bulleit blending team can do, which has us pretty excited for when their own-make finally hits these bottles in the next decade.

6. Redemption High-Rye Bourbon Aged 10 Years

ABV: 57.2%

Average Price: $100

Source: MGP of Indiana

The Whiskey:

This limited edition from Redemption is all about the barrel picking process. The whiskey starts with a mash of 60 percent corn, 36 percent rye, and four percent malted barley. That rye-heavy juice is then aged for ten long years. Then the Redemption team sorts through those barrels to find the perfect one to bottle untouched.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a definite sense of the whole vanilla bean (husk to oils) next to nuttiness and a mild floral flourish that’s fresh and… almost wet. The taste veers away from that and indulges in eggnog spices, rich and buttery toffee, pecans and walnuts, cedar, and a silken vanilla texture. The end is long-ish and has this very distant hint of lemon curd that leads back to those eggnog spices and egg custard creaminess, paired with a little high-proof buzz.

Bottom Line:

This is a complex sipper. The high ABVs will tempt you to add a rock, which will open up more of the lemon, cedar, and nutty nature. In the end, this is a testament to the power of great barrel selection from MGP’s famed warehouses.

5. Kentucky Owl Confiscated

ABV: 48.2%

Average Price: $175

Source: Undisclosed Kentucky Distilleries

The Whiskey:

Kentucky Owl is another resurrection brand by Master Blender Dixon Dedman, the great-great-grandson of the shingle’s original founder. Yes, this is sourced juice from an undisclosed distillery in Kentucky, meaning we don’t know a whole lot of what’s in the bottle, but that leaves the family story and the taste of the whiskey as our only touchstones.

On those two levels: this expression excels.

Tasting Notes:

The sip draws you in with a slight rye note of anise and maybe even licorice next to old cellar oak, vanilla cream, and a touch of ripe cherry. The taste warms on the tongue with dark spices, more of that old oak, and a touch of raw leather. The end is long and touches back on those spices, building a real buzzing on your senses, and hitting back towards that oak and leather, with just a hint of cherry tobacco.

Bottom Line:

While Dedman is no longer part of Kentucky Owl, these old releases are his vision and worth seeking (to drink and lay down in a vault). These also make us pretty stoked to see what Dedman does post-Kentucky Owl.

4. Heaven’s Door Redbreast Master Blender’s Edition

ABV: 50%

Average Price: $115

Source: Undisclosed Tennessee Distillery

The Whiskey:

This whiskey is a collaboration between Heaven’s Door Master Blender Ryan Perry and Redbreast’s legendary Master Blender Billy Leighton. The duo worked long and hard to create multiple whiskey expressions, which Bob Dylan taste-tested and granted final approval on.

The juice in the bottle is Heaven Door’s low-rye ten-year-old Tennessee bourbon. They take that whiskey and fill it into Redbreast whiskey casks that had previously aged Irish whiskey for 12 years. After 15 months of final maturation, those barrels are vatted and slightly proofed down with soft Tennessee spring water.

Tasting Notes:

This opens with this medley of marzipan, soft leather, prunes and dates, Gala apples, a hint of cedar, and a whisper of ripe red cherry. There’s this body of nutmeg that leads towards a light vanilla pound cake full of candied and dried fruits with a soft Niederegger marzipan center. That then draws towards subtle pops of orange oils, floral honey, walnuts in buttery brown sugar syrup, and this mild touch of spiced apple tobacco leaf. The end lasts for just the right amount of time and leaves you with a walnut shell dryness, soft warmth, and slight tobacco chew buzz that all circles back towards a raisin sherry sweetness and a final morsel of that vanilla pound cake.

Bottom Line:

This has already sold out of its initial pre-order run on Reservebar. The secondary market is going to be where you find this from now on and it’ll only be getting more expensive. Looking at current prices: this is worth every penny.

3. Barrell Craft Spirits Bourbon Aged 15 Years

ABV: 52.5%

Average Price: $250

Source: Undisclosed Kentucky, Tennessee, and Indiana Distilleries

The Whiskey:

Barrell Craft Spirits is another craft blendery that’s sourcing some of the best barrels in the game and expertly marrying those barrels. This expression blends 15-year-old bourbon from Indiana, Kentucky, and Tennesse into a final product that reaches new heights for blended bourbon.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a lot to draw you in with this nose of rich tobacco spiciness next to soft cedar, tart cherry pie filling, saffron stewed pears, salted toffee, and what almost feels like the salted water left after boiling artichokes (seriously). The fruitiness really builds as the cherry leads towards a bowl full of ripe raspberries swimming in cream with a dusting of dark spices and brown sugar that’s countered by a dose of floral tea leaves, culminating with a mildly bitter coffee bean. The end is long and really holds onto the cherry and raspberry fruit while a note of that soft cedar dips back in with a hint of menthol tobacco buzz.

Bottom Line:

This is another bottle that easily outshines bottles twice the price (secondary mark-up wise). It’s interestingly complex while still feeling 100 percent accessible. That makes it sort of an education in that it takes you somewhere new without pushing you away.

2. Blue Run 13.5-Year Barrel #3 “Honey Barrel”

ABV: 63.41%

Average Price: $230

Source: Undisclosed Kentucky Distillery

The Whiskey:

The juice in the bottle is hand-selected by Jim Rutledge and barreled as a single barrel at cask strength with less than 150 bottles per release. That makes each release extremely unique… and fleeting. Beyond that, very little is known beyond the age statement.

Tasting Notes:

You get a deep sense of buttery toffee on the nose that leads you down a rocky path through a cherry orchard as soft notes of vanilla, worn leather, and warm, spicy tobacco leaves gently settle in your senses. The taste leans into the dark and bold cherry with a deeper dark berry underbelly that’s accentuated by heavily roasted cacao beans, singed vanilla husks, and a sticky toffee pudding made with rich dates. The end softens the leather as the dark chocolate lingers the longest on your senses with a final touch of almost peppery spice.

Bottom Line:

This is a real eye-opener when it comes to what great bourbon can be and what’s waiting out there in orphan barrels across the industry’s warehouses. Although this is going to be impossible to find anywhere near suggested retail (or at all), it’s worth the hunt to both expand your bourbon palate and really enriched your collection.

1. Michter’s 25-Year Kentucky Straight Bourbon

ABV: 58.1%

Average Price: $9,000

Source: Undisclosed Kentucky Distillery

The Whiskey:

This is a sourced barrel of 25-year-old juice. That’s all we really know besides that it’s a whiskey that needed zero cutting to taste amazing.

Tasting Notes:

This draws you in with this matrix of rich and brandy-soaked holiday cake brimming with candied and dried fruits that edges into a smoked almond nuttiness and an almost funky rummy molasses next to browned butter on its own. That browned butter is what informs the palate, as the silkiness of this taste cannot be overstated. The palate really leans into the smoked almonds with a nice savory edge while the butter marries the holiday cake and almonds to create rich marzipan with a very mild cedar note that’s like a very old cigar humidor. The end just sits on your palate — like a soft hug from an old friend as the nuttiness and sweetness slowly fade out, leaving you … happy.

Bottom Line:

This 25-year-old bourbon is a masterpiece. We’ll never know where these barrels came from. But you know what? Who cares? This juice is the nectar of the gods.

Look at it this way, there’s a reason this costs about twice as much as Pappy 23 on the secondary market.

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Once the majority of free agents were signed (or signed and traded) a few days into the offseason’s official start on August 1, the NBA rumor mill has been fixated on the Ben Simmons saga in Philadelphia.

Simmons is the last of the big names still left on the trade block from this offseason, but throughout his efforts to get out of Philadelphia, there has been rather consistent reporting that a deal that would make the Sixers happy simply wasn’t out there. The teams most interested had the least interesting “win-now” packages to offer, and Philadelphia was reportedly hunting for a James Harden-like package of draft picks in return that made teams scoff and walk away from the negotiating table.

The result has been a stalemate that saw Simmons insist he will holdout until a deal gets done, initially feeling strong enough in his conviction to take on whatever fines will come his way for missing camp and games. However, it appears that stance is softening considerably after he wasn’t paid the big chunk of his salary that was due on October 1 and continues to miss game checks and get fined for his absence this preseason. On Monday morning, the mass text went out as ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski and The Athletic’s Shams Charania both reported at the same time with eerily similar wording that Simmons, Klutch, and the Sixers were working feverishly “on a resolution” that will end his holdout and bring him back to Philly.

The problem is, the relationship is very fractured right now and it seems as if Simmons’ teammates have been fine moving forward without him after being told not to come out to California to try and talk to him and convince him to return prior to camp. Joel Embiid in particular has been quite open about the situation, expressing his frustrating with everything that’s going down and saying he’s just focused on the guys in the building, while constantly noting that the team is better with Simmons.

On top of that, fans have completely turned on Simmons, and it seems unlikely they are going to have a change of heart suddenly which will likely only exasperate issues.

All told, this has been a situation where neither the Sixers or Simmons have handled this well. For Philly’s part, it was not figuring this part out sooner and figuring out the Plan B should a trade not materialize that would have kept some of this ugliness behind closed doors. For Simmons and his camp, it was not fully thinking through the ramifications of a holdout and recognizing that they didn’t really have the leverage to force a trade when it became abundantly clear that a great trade package wasn’t out there when his value was at its lowest after a disastrous playoff run.

Now, it seems we are going to get some additional drama in this story, as we’ll see how he can work back in with the team and how this saga plays out now that trade talks seem likely to sit on a back burner until desperation sets in for those pursuing him.