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Andy Richter On ‘Conan,’ Going Deep On His Podcast, And Being Home In Time For Dinner

Over the last few years, we’ve gotten to know Andy Richter a little better than being known as the funny, talented, and affable comedy partner in crime to Conan O’Brien. At least in as much as you can get to know someone through social media posts. I don’t want to say Richter pulls no punches, because Richter does consider what he’s saying, but he’s also open — about his divorce, his anxieties, his opinions on politics, and his life. The Three Questions podcast is a continuation of that, whether officially or no. In each episode, Richter utilizes that same openness in long, rich interviews with comics, actors, and interesting people, seeking to find out why his guests are who they are without a block on reflecting on his own experiences.

A few weeks ago, just prior to the start of widespread social distancing, we spoke with Richter about that openness, getting to the core of who people are, being happy with his life, and his work partnering with Conan O’Brien. We also did our best to get a sense of who he is.

I really like the approach with the podcast. Everyone you have on, it seems like there’s an established relationship or that they’re people that you know. Is that a part of the mix here or am I misreading?

Well, it frequently is. But then I also talk to people that I don’t know that well. But I try to come from the perspective of treating everybody like I’m going to start and just do a little mini-biography. Not just with dates and resumes but also with a little bit of introspection, self-reflection, and with a kind of philosophical angle. And what’s nice is that I think most people have known what they’re getting into. And for the people that I know really well, it’s an excuse to talk to them in a way that I normally wouldn’t talk to them. I wouldn’t say “tell me about your childhood” to somebody that I’ve known for 20 years. I’ve learned things from people that I’ve known forever just because of the format of the thing. I want a certain level of familiarity with everybody that comes on and I try and gain that by not only just being polite and relaxing and having a pretty good sense of how deep I can go with people, but also by being willing to share stuff myself.

I’m uncomfortable with the sort of borderline between creating an interesting show in which people say honest, real, and interesting things and exploiting people and tricking them into saying more than they might want to share in a public forum by exposing too much of themselves. I don’t want to just have people spill their guts for content. But I do think it [the podcast] is kind of an interesting thing to listen to and I think that when you hear people talk it’s better to hear honesty than it is to hear dishonesty. My idea is just to kind of have the kind of conversations that I like to have with people, which aren’t necessarily about pop culture, but more about, “Why do you think you are the way you are?”

Like you say, you open yourself up on the show, also on social media, talking about things that are going on in your life. Is that sort of how you walk that line? You wouldn’t go someplace that you’re not prepared to go personally so it’s a kind of one for you, one for them kind of thing?

I don’t look at it just like some kind of very strictly formulated quid pro quo. I also think there’s good value in not being ashamed of your humanity. And it’s a touchy thing because, especially when you’re in the public eye, people can be really shitty. I went through a divorce and there are people online — shit posters — who basically use that as, “Oh, here’s a new thing to be mean to him about.” Which is just mind-boggling to me. This is the dissolution of my family. [Laughs] This is the worst thing I’ve ever been through and now you’re yelling at me about it because you don’t like who I’m voting for for president so you’re saying shit about the breakup of my home? So you have to be careful.

But then again, I also feel like this is all real stuff and I’m not ashamed of being a real person and I’m not ashamed of having emotions and having difficulty and having pain in my life. And in many ways, the reason I say it out loud is so it doesn’t seem like a dirty little secret. It’s cathartic for me to talk about. I’ve been in therapy for a million years. It’s cathartic to talk about things and the human experiences is usually more similar than it is dissimilar between any given two people. So why not talk about it?

I mean, I see that and I am inspired by that. But I’ve also had things going on in my life that I’ve written about or thought about writing about and there has been a fear aspect that I couldn’t shake. Specifically with your divorce, when you decided to really open up about that, how did you get past “am I going to get bullied” concerns? Is this going to affect me in a bad way mentally if I see all these assholes online going at this?” How do you get past that?

Well, there was a time early on in this particular process that I was such a raw nerve that I don’t even know that there was a lot of thought involved. I was just kind of screaming into the void and you just kind of play it by ear… Or, at least I should say, I just kind of play it by ear and I try not to say things that could possibly be interpreted as biased against anybody involved in the situation. I try not to divulge personal things about people other than myself. It’s fine for me to talk about how I feel but if talking about how I feel somehow insinuates something about the way someone else is or behaves or does I don’t talk about it. Because it’s not fair. I only can tell my story.

So I am very careful about that. I’m also very careful to not be… You know, I made a couple of jokes on Twitter… very sort of benign jokes about, “now I’m a divorced dad living alone.” And I realized that’s not funny. To me, it felt like catharsis and the way I deal with lots of stuff is to make jokes, but I thought, “My kids aren’t going to think this is funny.” So I deleted them. Because they don’t have an ironic distance from it that even I might have. It wasn’t a joke to my kid and still isn’t a joke to my kids and it shouldn’t be. You learn, you make mistakes and you learn

How have they handled the divorce and kind of the aftermath and where you are now?

Pretty good. Everybody’s doing pretty good. But there’s always been lots of communication. I mean, everybody loves their kids, but I mean my kids, they’re really fantastic, emotionally evolved people. They’re both really smart and really sensitive and very caring and loving people. So it helps. But the main thing is, we talk about it. We don’t let stuff fester. And they understand that. That doesn’t mean I force them. They’re encouraged to talk about it and I’ll tell them that. I think that they feel we can talk to each other. A good way to parent is based on learning by negative example. And so not being able to share certain things was a frustration to me when I was a kid and then there was oversharing too. [Laughs] But finding that balance to me — it’s been very important.

How do you think your parent’s divorce kind of impacted you? You were very young, right?

Yeah. I was very young.

How did that impact your career, what you wound up doing?

The main thing it did was it made me sad and invited this sadness into my life that was like a character that was… In the story of my life, sadness was like a next-door neighbor. I guess probably as far as impacting my career, I mean, I will say that from an early age, I liked how making people laugh in my family eased the tension. So, I ended up, as time went on, becoming kind of the keeper of morale. The peacekeeper, the morale keeper, the entertainer, and that probably led right into… Hey, it’s a nice thing to make people laugh because it cuts the tension in life, and for a little while everyone feels happy. That probably was a big motivator when I started getting on stage to try and make people laugh.

The show [Conan] has never been overly political, even at the moment we’re in right now where it just seems to be everywhere. Is that something you like about the show? That it has the ability to kind of transcend things and just keep the peace, bring people together and laugh about things as opposed to necessarily reflecting on the scariness and ugliness sometimes?

Yeah. I mean, when we started, that was just the way that we were built. When Jon Stewart really took off on The Daily Show, that was the beginning of taking what was going on and things being so so overtly topical to the point where it was also kind of pointed. To me, just to be reductive about it, that always felt a little bit like preaching to the choir. A lot of that kind of humor, you’re not getting laughs, you’re getting cheers and I don’t care about cheers. I like laughs. Conan actually said to me once, “There are all kinds of people doing topical stuff and making political points,” and he said, “It’s so much more interesting to me to just be silly and be absurd and explore the absurd, and ultimately I think it’s doing a greater service to humanity.” There’s no test to prove that, but I agree with him and it’s what we started out doing. It’s what I’m used to doing. And also, quite frankly, I don’t find it that funny. I don’t find Trump that funny. What’s going on in the world, I don’t want to make jokes about it. I don’t want to have to think about, “What’s a funny bit about how dire everything is?” or “What’s the funny bit about the planet dying?” I’m just glad that I’m not in a place where I have to think up jokes about immigration or jokes about the administration’s ineptitude of handling a possible pandemic. Like ugh! I mean, I could think up jokes about them, but holy shit is that a joyless task.

I mean, for me personally, it’s a favorite that hits the spot from time to time. I can’t deny that. Sometimes it feels good.

Yeah.

There’s a Harold Ramis quote that I saw a couple of days ago and I’ve been thinking about it. I’m gonna butcher it, but it was basically about the idea of political satire and how it kind of gives us a false sense of action. We’re laughing at this thing, we’re smart, we know what’s wrong with the world and we can poke fun at it. But it’s not actually doing much of anything, which I think is an interesting thought.

Yeah. Well, and I also do think that when you take something out in the real world and then you run it through the entertainment machine you sort of… In some ways, it makes it seem less scary, but in other ways, it also, in some ways, makes it more possible. There’s something in me that feels like the more we joke about Trump, the more possible Trump is. I mean, I remember hearing that Will Ferrell always felt a little ambivalent about doing George W. Bush because he made George W. Bush kind of likable. Because Will Ferrell is likable. And he always felt kind of weird about that because when you watch Will Ferrell do George W. Bush, you think like, “Oh, this loveable idiot.” I mean, he may in real life be a lovable idiot, but he was at the front of some really fucking horrible, horrible shit.

It kind of sands down the thorns a little bit.

Yeah. To what Ramis was saying, you’re laughing about it, which feels like doing something, but you’re not really doing something about it. You’re demystifying it. You think you’re really fucking giving a good one… “Man, we really skewered Trump.” No, you didn’t.

Yeah, definitely. I noticed that you’d shared a great old school clip recently revealing a raid and a sting operation on the old show. How often do you revisit things like that? Are you able to look back with fondness on that stuff or do you mostly just kind of focus on the here and now?

Mostly on the here and now. One of our old writers, Brian Stack, who writes for Colbert now, he’ll frequently post old Conan bits because he has an encyclopedic photographic memory of comedy and comedy bits. So he’s almost sort of a little archivist in and of himself. Some of them are great and they make me proud like the one where the whole thing was a sting operation. It basically ends on a really sad and weird, lonely, downbeat note which… I don’t know a lot of other shows [would go there]. I mean, we’re the old men now, but I still feel like this is the funniest talk show on television. We still do stuff that I don’t think other people really do much of. And by that I just mean just fucking weird shit that you don’t see anywhere else. Somebody who might not get it will ask, “What the hell was that about?” And if you do get it, you’re like, “It was about being hilarious.” It’s not supposed to have a lot of meaning outside of this. But that was a good bit. I still am very proud of the place that we carved out for ourselves in late-night television.

It seems like you’ve been doing less with the remotes and things like that. Is that a conscious choice?

It just sort of evolved that way.

In addition to the podcast and being on-camera as Conan’s co-host, you’re also a producer on the show. Is it all bittersweet that your schedule keeps you from pursuing other options? It sounds like from everything that I have read that that was part of the reason you left originally. Has that lessened over time?

It’s lessened over time. I mean, I’m older too. I was itchier when I was younger and I had done that show for seven years. I didn’t set out to be Andy Richter on television, I set out to be a comic actor, a character actor. So there was kind of this unanswered question to me like, “Could I be doing this? Could I be succeeding in this area?” And so I took that leap and I did that. I was the star of three network television shows, which is in and of itself was a pretty big success, but also, I was chewed up and spit out in many ways. And when Conan got The Tonight Show and came back and he basically said, “Do you want to come back, work for a bunch of people that you know and love?” You don’t have to think of a pilot idea and go around town and tell people about it and then three people decide, “Well, we want two different people” and then you have to pick one of them and then you write the script and they tell you what’s wrong and then… It just takes so fucking long. He was saying to me, “Think of something while you’re driving to work and it’s going to be on TV tonight.” And I was really ready to get back to that.

When I see trailers for comedies and I know virtually everyone in them, I’m like, “Why can’t I be in that?” I mean, one of the reasons is, well, I’ve got this steady gig and I have to tell myself, “For the last nine years, I was home for dinner and I have two kids.” I mean, the kids are 19 and 13 now. But for the last ten years or so I was home for dinner, and there’s not a lot of people making comedy for television that can say that, to the level that I am and with this sort of steady income that I’ve had. It afforded me a lot of luxury. In terms of a steady paycheck and a lot of time for my family and for my kids. And also, I got to make fun TV. It never felt like I wasn’t making funny TV.

‘Conan’ airs Monday-Thursday on TBS at 11pm EST and you can listen to ‘The Three Questions With Andy Richter’ podcast on Apple.

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Mike Vrabel Said His Son Was ‘On A Stool’ Not The Toilet During An NFL Draft Live Shot

The first round of the 2020 NFL Draft was a strange one given that it was done virtually, with all personnel and players at their homes due to COVID-19, but despite concerns over the possibility of technical difficulties, it went off without a hitch.

ESPN and the NFL Network’s co-broadcast was handled about as well as one could have hoped for, with Trey Wingo doing yeoman’s work from the studio, running point and keeping things on track and the broadcast from being too awkward as they dealt with feed delays between all the remote analysts at home. The most intriguing part of the home draft, aside from the actual picks being made, was seeing everyone’s home setup.

There were some, like Kliff Kingsbury, that showed off their palatial estate, while other coaches and GMs had much more modest setups. Many family members made appearances, both planned and otherwise, but there were no controversies or disasters, a major win for the league. The one moment that caused a stir was when the Titans were on the clock, ahead of taking gigantic Georgia tackle Isaiah Wilson to replace Jack Conklin, when Mike Vrabel and his nearly grown children were shown, with one dressed as Frozone from The Incredibles.

ESPN

In the background on the left, next to the costumed son, is a reflection that some thought was one of his other kids sitting on the toilet. Vrabel was sure to clarify that it was not an accidental live shot of his son going to the bathroom, but instead his son was just sitting on a stool.

We’ll take Vrabel’s word for it, but it is a good reminder to everyone with the remote camera that they need to make sure that their background is not only TV friendly, but isn’t going to reflect towards something that might not be.

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19 TV And Movie Villains That Honestly Deserved Better


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HBO Explores The Underbelly Of Elite Public School Malfeasance In ‘Bad Education’

The makers of Bad Education went into last year’s Toronto Film Festival hoping their film would be acquired by a major distributor who’d push an Oscars-qualifying theatrical run — based on strong dramatic turns from Hugh Jackman, Alison Janney, and Ray Romano. In a mildly disappointing twist at the time, HBO bought it for $20 million. It hits streaming this week, when closed theaters and quarantine-decimated release schedules all but ensure it being the most high-profile new release around. Silver lining?

The cast, outfitted in the finest Long Island aughts kitsch couture, faces pulled and bunched in an approximation of normie, practically ooze prestige, turning in committed performances from the headliners on down to the younger bit players (like Annaleigh Ashford from Masters of Sex, a favorite of mine). Performances aside, it’s hard at times to separate Bad Education‘s pretensions of nuance and moral ambiguity from your basic muddled storytelling.

With sumptuous direction from Cory Finley (previously of the 2018 arthouse darling Thoroughbreds), Bad Education tells the story of Roslyn Long Island school superintendent Frank Tassone (a tight-kinned Hugh Jackman with his Dracula wig set to “Italian”) and how Tassone came to be involved in “the single largest public school embezzlement scandal in history.”

That this all took place in the pressure cooker of the hyper-competitive college placement industry would seem to give Bad Education a timely hook — what with Laurie Loughlin et. al still fighting to stay out of prison — and the fact that it was all uncovered by an article in Roslyn’s own school newspaper makes it feel a bit like a real-life noir twist on Election (in my opinion the best high school movie of all time).

Yet where Election finds comedy in pathos, Bad Education only occasionally seems interested in laughs. It feels more like a patient, minute-by-minute exposé in which the characters only gradually reveal themselves. Finley’s direction feels incisive at times, using subtle shifts in POV to convey what each character is learning and what they’re attempting to obfuscate, but the script, by Mike Makowsky, a graduate of Roslyn himself, leaves somewhat ambiguous the question of what, exactly, is being exposed.

With such a detailed retelling of a 15-year-old corruption case that probably wouldn’t even make the resume of your average Trump cabinet appointee, there are the natural questions of why this story and why now. Truly great movies succeed by finding the humanity in all their characters (see: The Death Of Dick Long) but Bad Education seems uniquely twisted up between sympathy and scorn. It could be that the culprits themselves were the wrong lens for the story.

On the one hand, Tassone and his deputy, Pam Gluckin (Janney), seem like compassionate school administrators — taking the time to study up on all their students and parents in order to provide that personal touch. Tassone even encourages the budding journalist who eventually brings them down (played by promising newcomer Geraldine Viswanathan). On the other, Tassone and Gluckin are clearly political and opportunistic, spending school money on fast cars, second homes, and facelifts (Jackman’s makeup is particularly outstanding).

The vague title is a tell. There’s the general tone of uncovering something shocking and nefarious, but Bad Education is far more interesting when it’s sympathetic toward its stated villains. If Frank Tassone and Pam Gluckin personally profited from turning their affluent school district into exactly the kind of Ivy League feeder program the parents and local community all wanted, what, exactly, is the harm? Even Makowsky, who said he “received the best education of [his] life at Roslyn” seems to struggle with this question.

Bad Education seems aware that Tassone and Gluckin did something wrong, but, aside from two very brief shots of leaky roof tiles, it’s unclear on who actually suffered by it. The administrators themselves take occasional, brief stabs at justifying themselves — noting that good public schools are the foundation of the town’s rising property values — with Tassone belatedly pointing out how the townspeople treat them like faceless, interchangeable cogs in the admissions machine, but it never quite finds its crescendo.

It would’ve benefited Bad Education to see some of these thoughts through. Why are the local parents willing to pay for these grand, superficial improvements to the school’s facade when the educators actually mentoring their children are still expected to work for public servants’ salaries? If they game a broken system and no one notices the missing money, what is the harm? This is slightly more than self-justification.

Ultimately it’s hard to believe that Tassone and Gluckin were the good guys here — they were, after all, administrators, essentially politicians, and they seem to have diverted that excess money into their own pockets, not their school’s teachers — the people still working for 40 or 50 grand or so per year in a place where the average home prices were in the seven figures. Bad Education gives brief lip service to these factors but a few shots of leaky roof tiles are a weak substitute for the real victim’s actual perspectives. Were we supposed to empathize with the ceiling foam?

Bad Education plumbs the psyches of its two leads — the closed gay repressed philanderer Tassone and the oft-married, entertaining-obsessed Gluckin. This produces some great performances from Jackman and Janney (surely among the best of her generation) but ultimately I’m not sure their motivations were actually that complicated. They were greedy, vain, and consumed by maintaining their position, like politicians and CEOs everywhere. When Gluckin, exposed first, pointedly tells Tassone “I’m not the sociopath here” the film seems to suggest that perhaps the sociopath is Tassone.

But avoiding that kind of pat, unsatisfying takeaway is the entire reason to tell a story like Bad Education in the first place. Otherwise we could just read the news stories about a bad man who went to prison. During the second half of the movie I found myself waiting for that inevitable epilogue text at the end to just tell me what happened. That’s generally a clear indication that a storyteller hasn’t found the compelling insights they were seeking.

Vince Mancini is on Twitter. You can access his archive of reviews here.

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James Blake Praises The Beauty Of His Lover On His New Song, ‘You’re Too Precious’

One of 2019’s stronger efforts, James Blake impressed many with his Assume Form album. Since then Blake has shared a deluxe version of the album, multiple videos for songs from Assume Form, including “Barefoot In The Park” and “Can’t Believe The Way We Flow,” and performances on both daytime and nighttime TV. Quite possibly closing the book on Assume Form officially, James Blake returns with a new single.

Following recent at-home performances, which that of which included a cover of Billie Eilish’s “When The Party’s Over,” James Blake shares his new single “You’re Too Precious.” The single, produced by Blake and Dominic Maker, serves as his first release since sharing the deluxe version of Assume Form and according to Pitchfork, the song was originally teased during an Instagram Live session Blake held during April.

These Instagram Live session Blake has held have been quite entertaining for his fans and a way for Blake to fulfill his goal of playing more piano. In a quarantine livestream late last month, Blake covered Radiohead’s “No Surprises,” Feist’s “The Limit To Your Love,” and Frank Ocean’s “Godspeed,” while also diving into his own catalog to play “Retrograde” and other hits.

Press play on the video above to hear “You’re Too Precious.”

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I Just Watched “Hunchback Of Notre Dame” For The First Time And Um…WTF


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Lalo Salamanca From ‘Better Call Saul’ Is The Best Villain On TV

There’s a difference between a bad guy and a villain. A bad guy just needs to do bad stuff: rob banks, murder some people, kidnap the protagonist’s love interest or child or dog. Gus Fring, the drug-slinging chicken man from Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, is a great bad guy. He’s brilliant and ruthless and meticulous, he plans things out carefully and gives speeches about it all and his stare can lower the temperature of the room he’s in by 15-20 degrees. I love Gus Fring. He is not, however, a great villain.

A villain needs something more, a joy in doing bad, an infectious charisma, the sense that they really like being as evil as they can be. Justified was a show with a lot of good villains: Boyd Crowder, Mags Bennett, Wynn Duffy, etc. Even its secondary villains were great, your Limehouses and Quarlses and Dickie Bennetts. They all had great one-liners and personality for days and that intangible magnetism a good villain has. The Breaking Bad universe, an almost-perfect television empire, has not had great villains, historically. Bad guys galore, all of them conflicted and menacing, but missing that charm: Tuco (meth-addled maniac), Gus Fring (see above), the Nazis (uh… Nazis). Heck, even Walter White, destroyer of worlds and families, wasn’t really what I would consider a full-on villain. It was the one glaring flaw in Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul.

Until the fifth season of Better Call Saul. Enter Lalo Salamanca.

AMC

If we want to be technical about all of this, Lalo made his debut in the fourth season. After Hector was poisoned and Tuco went to jail, he came in to fill the void in the spot above Nacho in the cartel. He was fun even then, cooking in the kitchen and smiling a lot and carrying around this sense of impending doom wherever he went, like that grin could disappear at any moment and be replaced with the narrowed eyes of a killer. A good character, sure, and someone to keep Nacho in constant fear and be a much-needed worthy adversary for Gus Fring until a certain bald chemistry teacher shows up. A chaos agent to introduce conflict on that side of the show. Fine, great, wonderful.

But this most recent season, as it progressed and the show’s two worlds started merging, with Jimmy becoming “a friend of the cartel” through his relationship with Nacho and Mike, both of whom are now firmly in Gus Fring’s orbit… hoo boy. Lalo became a star. He’s a back-slapping, charismatic terror, a thorn in the side of every main character on the show. He’s waging war against Gus and Mike, he’s now suspicious that Nacho conspired to assassinate him, he showed up at Jimmy and Kim’s door looking for answers. He has his giddy little fingers in everything and he is having the time of his life.

It’s not just that he’s a blast, although it is very much that, as the GIF above indicates. Tony Dalton and the writers of the show seem to be having a ball playing around with this lunatic, to a degree that is almost obscene. I’m still flabbergasted that they could just go out and create a top ten — top five? — character in the whole Breaking Bad universe almost 12 full seasons into their run. It’s witchcraft is what it is. We should consider burning them at the stake. Once they’re done making this show. And maybe a Lalo prequel. We can just have the stake ready. Put it in the basement for now.

But again, there’s more there than charisma. Lalo would be a good character even if he was mostly just comic relief. What makes Lalo great, though, is how staggeringly competent he is. His suspicions about both Nacho and Jimmy? Totally justified. Nacho very much did have a part in the assassination attempt; Jimmy lied through his teeth about his desert debacle. Lalo sniffed out both of these betrayals almost immediately, like he has a superpower for it. I made the argument a few weeks ago that he was basically Spider-man, between this hyper-sensitive sense for danger and his shocking athleticism. This last part cannot be overstated. Look at him burst through the ceiling in season four to kill the poor innocent travel agent who saw too much.

AMC

Look at him leap into a dang ravine to get a closer look at Jimmy’s bullet-riddled abandoned car.

AMC

And that was before the season five finale, when he pulled a Kevin McCallister by defending his home from intruders by using bubbling oil as a booby trap and secret passages as routes for both escape and ambush. It was a strange spot to be in as a viewer. We know he’s a bad guy. We know any success he has will come at a cost to characters we care about, like Nacho and Kim and Mike. And yet, there I was, nervous about sweet evil mustachioed prince getting hurt. I will be inconsolable when he dies. It’s fine. I’m doing fine.

And let’s be clear here: Lalo will not make it out of this alive, in all likelihood. It’s one of the tricky parts of a prequel. We know the fates of a set of characters who make it to Breaking Bad. Gus and Mike are both there for a while, thriving, and the look on Lalo’s face at the end of this season after he killed their assassins… well, it was not the face of a man who is prepared to consider it water under the bridge. It was the face of a man who wants to blow up the bridge and then leap like a jungle cat into the river bed to hunt the survivors.

It’s creating an awkward situation for me, personally, to have this future knowledge. I love Lalo now. I get excited every time I see him show up on the screen. I caught myself saying “Yesssss,” out loud, when he rolled up to Don Eladio’s pool party in the season finale. It’s gotten to the point that I have kind of started rooting for Lalo. Like, really rooting for him — to defeat Gus, to continue his bromance with Don Eladio, to survive this show and become the Big Bad that Walter White has to deal with in Breaking Bad. I know it won’t happen. It can’t. But still, that’s a fun show to play around with in your head for a while, one where Lalo replaces Gus. Those two are total opposites, fire and ice, improv and organization. Lalo is the kind of guy who shows up at a wedding reception and schmoozes and dances all night and has someone’s grandma doing tequila shots at one point. Gus has one drink (champagne) and leaves after dinner is served, tie still tied and top button still buttoned. It’s what makes them such fun adversaries right now. They would hate each other even if they didn’t have business disagreements.

I’m not joking about this, for the record. I mean, I am, but I’m not. I would pay good money to see an alternate future Breaking Bad where Walter has to face down Lalo. I want to see how he counters someone so unpredictable and captivating. It kills me that I will never know. I’m not ready to let him go. I don’t think I’ll ever be. Lalo is a murderous goon and he might be the reason Kim doesn’t make it to Breaking Bad either and yet, here I am, gushing about him and comparing him to both Kevin McCallister and Spider-man. If that’s not the sign of a good villain, I’m not entirely sure what is.

Long live Lalo Salamanca. As long as possible, at least.

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Juice WRLD’s ‘Righteous’ Is His First Solo Posthumous Song

Approaching the six-month anniversary of his death, fans of Juice WRLD have been able to live in his memory courtesy of a few features he worked on prior to his passing. Working with G Herbo, Eminem, and YNW Melly, other artists have revealed that the young star will appear on their upcoming projects. Looking to add on to Juice’s legacy, fellow Chicago rapper Lil Bibby revealed in mid-April that a posthumous Juice WRLD album is on the way. Bibby is an executive at Grade A Productions, the same label Juice was signed to, so news of the album came with a wave of hope from fans after Friday night’s release, it appears that the album is in close proximity.

Sharing a new song, “Righteous,” the track comes hours after his estate released a statement Friday announcing the single. “Earlier this week, Juice’s mother, Carmela Wallace announced the establishment of the Live Five 999 Fund which will receive additional support via Grade A and Interscope Records,” the statement read. “Tonight we will be releasing a song called ‘Righteous’ which Juice made from his home studio in Los Angeles. We hope you enjoy this new music and continue to keep Juice’s spirit alive. Stay safe everyone.”

Attached with a video that shows behind-the-scenes footage of a free-spirited Juice Wrld, the track serves as Juice’s first solo release since his 2019 album, Death Race For Love.

Watch the video above to hear “Righteous.”

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Guapdad 4000 Concludes His Falcon Fridays Series With ‘Trade Places With Them Jeans’

Guapdad 4000 has been a force of consistency to respect across the music industry. Keeping up with his Falcon Fridays series, the Bay Area rapper has shared five singles over a five-week period to keep his fans satisfied and that wasn’t enough, Guapdad has also been keeping fans entertained with his Rona Raps series. Kicking fire freestyles with some of his talented rapper friends, the Rona Raps series has seen appearances from Buddy, Wiz Khalifa, Joey Badass, and more. Keeping things rolling for another week, Guapdad returns with a new Rona Raps episode and a new Falcon Fridays single.

After sharing a single for the scammers last week with “Embezzle,” Guapdad has now shifted his attention to the ladies on his new single, “Trade Places With Them Jeans.” Showing off a bit of his slick-talk, Guapdad tells the woman he has his eyes on that he himself will serve as a better comfort to her than the jeans she currently wears. Packaging the new single, as well as the previous Falcon Friday singles, into one project, listeners can now find the entire Falcon Friday series on his new EP, Platinum Falcon Tape, Vol. 1.

In addition to the new single, Guapdad’s latest Rona Raps episode has also arrived, one that sees appearances from Kota The Friend, Wowg8 of Earthgang, Murs, and Ramriddlz. With the biggest cast the series has offered so far, fans have plenty of Rona Raps to look forward to.

Press play on the videos above to hear “Trade Places With Them Jeans” and the latest Rona Raps episode.

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Top Chef Power Rankings, Episode 6: The Endive Thief

With the race becoming too close to call on Top Chef, this week gave us… (*gasp*) a double elimination. Going into this episode, there were two obvious candidates for that double elimination, but surprise surprise, they both avoided the guillotine’s blade (lotta that goin’ around lately).

Before that, there was a quickfire challenge in which the contestants were assigned to make “the perfect dish, using flour.” The twist? No all-purpose flour! Instead, they only had an assortment of no-purpose flours! Unorthodox flours only! Tapioca? I hardly know-ca!

They were only given 30 minutes to complete this challenge, which was somewhat disappointing considering that every sourdough-starting bandwagon baker bro in the country was probably hoping to see how those flours might rise. Are you kidding me, no crumb shot? This bread porno sucks. Honestly, how are you going to do a flour challenge where no one uses yeast? Oh, gosh you made a roux? How exciting.

To judge this challenge, they brought in Gru from Despicable Me.

Bravo

I kid, I kid. Clearly that’s Chris Bianco, the world-famous pizza man. He joked that while he had dedicated his life to pizza, the contestants’ dishes did not actually need to be round. At this Bryan Voltaggio let out a hearty guffaw and wrote it down to save for later. “Ha ha ha,” he said, shaking his head. “What’ll they think of next.”

After that, the boys and girls drew knives, with each knife representing one of the five tastes — salty, sweet, sour, bitter, and umami. Dang, which one is a crudo? They paired off into teams of two and had to build dishes based on the flavors on their knives. That’s when Padma dropped the bomb: it was to be a dreaded double elimination challenge, in which two people would go home.

A conductor of the LA Philharmonic was brought in to help judge and the contestants got to tour the Walt Disney Concert Hall in order to inspire the proper quotient of bad music metaphors. “The sustain on these smoked peaches is superb, but I do wonder if the uni foam needed to be so fortissimo.”

POWER RANKINGS

10. (-5) ((Eliminated)) Nini Nguyen

NBC Universal

AKA: Broad City. Aka Quipz. Aka Bolo. Aka Gwyneth.

Nini went full wellness in the first five minutes of this week’s episode (the slot the producers reserve for screwball comedy) charging up her crystals in the sun with Malarkey and Melissa. Did you get the sun on your yoni? I heard the crystals don’t work with a shaded yoni. Oh well, I guess this was inevitable in a season set in LA.

Nini’s banh xeo (a bomb-ass savory Vietnamese crepe, I highly recommend) landed her in the top three of the quickfire, but after teaming up with Karen in the elimination, the pair cooked up a poached cod in tomato broth, which the judges said was a beautiful dish, but ate more sweet and sour, rather than umami and sour like it was supposed to. Tom was incredulous, apoplectic that a professional chef could fail to roast their tomatoes for additional umami flavor. “Honestly, you should probably kill yourself,” Tom said.

And so Nini and Karen went home (pending the outcome of Last Chance Kitchen) in a double-elimination based on this season’s bitchiest nitpick. Pretty rough. This was the second time Nini has gone home during a double elimination, and this time got booted after placing top three in the quickfire.

9. (-3) ((Eliminated)) Karen Akunowicz

NBC Universal

AKA: Good Witch. Aka Glenda. Aka Aunt Kitty. Aka Rosie The Triveter

Assuming you read the above you know that Karen was eliminated along with Nini. I am shocked, SHOCKED that Karen left the competition before Lee Anne, Malarkey, and Stephanie C-Monster. Karen didn’t make the quickfire top three like Nini did, though she did reveal a background in musical theater during the trip to the concert hall. Hold on, the contestant with pink hair and cat-eye make up was into musical theater?! Please, someone pick my jaw up off the floor.

It was a disappointing finish rendered disappointing-er by the fact that Nini and Karen are almost the exact same size.

Bravo

RIP, Team Twinsies.

8. (+1) Brian Malarkey

Bravo

AKA: Shenanigans. Aka Grandpa Fancy. Aka Squirrely. Aka The Imp. Aka Leprechón.

Everything in this episode seemed to be leading us to a Shenanigans Swan Song. First, he recharged his crystals with Melissa and Nini, because of course. Then he attempted ice cream in the quickfire. It turned out he nailed the ice cream but couldn’t finish the accompanying donut, which was disqualifying in a flour challenge. He nonetheless took the opportunity to brag about his ice cream and paint the judges a mental picture of his non-existent donut. You gotta hand it to him, Squirrely can sure talk his way out of a jam. Almost like he has lots of practice or something.

When the judges let the contestants choose their own partners in the elimination challenge, Malarkey and Lee Anne ended up being stuck together, on what I like to call “Team Stench Of Failure.” This after Shenanigans “threw Lee Anne under the bus” two episodes ago, by blaming her own dish on her. They fought the entire time, could barely agree on anything, and ended up making… the judge’s second favorite dish of the night. They called it the best food either had cooked so far and said things like “you could really taste the team harmony, you guys worked as a cohesive unit, and it really came through in the dish.”

C’est la vie said the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell.

7. (+1) Lee Anne Wong

NBC Universal

AKA: Frazzle. Aka Loud Mom. Aka 911.

For the second week in a row Lee Anne managed to go without getting the paramedics called on her or her family members, which was a victory in itself. As if that wasn’t feat enough, she snaked all the endive to sabotage Eric and Bryan, and then her and Shenanigans’ “beef with miso anchovy hollandaise and bitter greens” (Umami/Bitter) damn near won them the episode. Just veteran move after veteran move from Lee Anne this episode. She’s right, one should never apologize for gamesmanship. Remember where Ned Stark ended up after all that time moaning about honor — headless in a mass grave.

Lee Anne tried to keep Shenanigans from buying carrots and tomatoes, only to end up feeding him carrots in the winner’s circle. Goes to show, sometimes you just have to pat Malarkey’s flanks to keep him calm (if you blow a whistle behind him he pees on the ground).

6. (even) Eric Adjepong

NBC Universal

AKA: Ghana. Aka Thesis. Aka Uncle Rico. Aka Kanye West Africa.

At this point, you might be noticing some weird things happening in this week’s rankings. Look, what can I tell you about Eric? He’s been coming on strong for the last three episodes and the first half of this one, but as soon as I saw his and Family Bry’s bone dry pork loin I thought they were going home. Pulling sweet/bitter, they spent hours making a maafe lacquer (*Borat voice* Ma afe!) for their pork loin only to discover that, yep, it was still a pork loin. There’s only so much you can accomplish with a pork loin crust when your crust-to-meat ratio is like skin-of-grape-to-rest-of-grape. Sure, Lee Anne swiped their endive but endive doesn’t put fat in pork loin am I right, guys?

Again, I’m shocked they didn’t go home. So does Eric rise in the rankings or plummet? I can’t bring myself to put him below Malarkey and Lee Anne or above anyone with high finishes this episode so I guess he holds steady at six.

5. (+5) Stephanie Cmar

NBC Universal

AKA: C-Monster. Aka Underdog. Aka C-Truffle.

Speaking of funky rankings, what do you do with C-Monster? She was paired with Gregory, almost certainly the favorite of this competition, and they received solid reviews on their brothy fish. She has to be above the challenge losers (Nini, Karen), the perennial basement dwellers (Lee Anne, Brian), and arguably Eric, who almost got sent home for his dry ass pork loin. So the C-Monster shoots up to number five, even though she was merely competent. Is this a new beginning or a peak? I guess we’ll C.

4. (even) Bryan Voltaggio

Bravo

AKA: Flatbill Dad. Aka Bry Voltage. Aka Kyle Shanahan. Aka Linkin Clark Griswold. Aka Family Bry

Most days Family Bry exudes the energy of an active flatbill dad in the Kyle Shanahan mode, looking to grill up some burgers and down a few Bud Light Limes between longboard seshes. This week, he seemed more like Kyle Shanahan after blowing another Super Bowl lead and going on a three-day bender in Vegas, complete with five o’clock shadow.

First, he blew the quickfire by cooking a delicious dish that used flour only in a crumble. He ended up in the bottom three alongside the other Brian. Then he hooked up with Eric in the elimination challenge for the aforementioned moisture-free pork loin debacle. Bry Voltage opened this competition looking like a favorite, but this is three or four lackluster finishes in a row now. I still have him at number four but I admit he’s skating by on reputation at this point.

3. (even) Kevin Gillespie

Bravo

AKA: Hops. Aka Oops All Kevins. Aka Bachelor Fried Rice. Aka Thicc Kev.

While the new wave hippie contestants were recharging their crystals in the sun this week, I like to imagine Southern Good Ol’ Boy Kevin was snorting a line of crushed pork rinds and sleeping inside a charred bourbon barrel for aromatherapy. Kevin has been nearly flawless these past few weeks, but he can’t quite pull ahead of prohibitive favorites Melissa and Gregory.

Paired with Melissa, Oops All Kevins turned in a “fish sauce caramel roasted cabbage with pork and apple crumble” for salty/sweet that ended up winning the challenge. But what can I do, put him ahead of his own partner? Or Gregory, who wins the quickfire every damn week? Kevin feels like the Charles Barkley of this competition, or maybe the Dan Marino, depending which sports metaphor you prefer.

2. (even) Melissa King

NBC Universal

AKA: Zen Master. Aka Dimples. Aka Shutterstock.

Melissa is so put together and casually confident that she can even make believing in magic crystals seem reasonable. She landed in the top three of the quickfire for her financier (think Proust, not Mnuchin) but lost a squeaker to her only real competition, Gregory. Before you could say “fish sauce caramel” she was back on top thanks to some crafty cabbage work (between this and the charred endive in episode one she clearly knows how to char some veg). Should Melissa be number one? Ehhh. She and Kevin were a number two and three (based on last week’s rankings) going against a number one and 10. I don’t know much about math or sports or odds or how to apply those to cooking competitions but it seems to me like she and Big Kev had the advantage all along.

1. (even) Gregory Gourdet

NBC Universal

AKA: Kravitz. Aka Hepcat. Aka Lids. Aka Pollos Hermanos.

Gregory dropped a bombshell of an advantage in the flour challenge: he’s been gluten-free for 10 years! I’ll be honest, I have nothing but respect for vegetarians and vegans but when someone tells me they’re non-Crohn’s disease gluten eschewers I mentally dismissive wank a little. As my ancestors would say: You donna like-a grandmama pasta??? VA VONGOOL!

This probably guarantees I will develop a gluten sensitivity in the next 10 years. Anyway, Gregory basically cemented his place at the top of these rankings when he won yet another quickfire cooking tapioca pancakes. He won with fucking pancakes! I haven’t ordered pancakes and not been sick of them after more than three bites since I reached puberty and this slick son of a bitch is beating entire baseball team worth of expert chefs with them. How do you even compete with a guy who’s winning challenges with fuckin’ tapioca pancakes?

Gregory is going to underbite smile his way across the finish line without even breaking a sweat. I’m not sure he even does sweat. Much like Melissa, this is a dude so chill he can pull off a studded leather vest with fringe.

Vince Mancini is on Twitter. Read more of his cooking commentary and mom jokes in UPROXX’s Cooking Battles. For past Top Chef Power Rankings, go here.