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Dalton Ross wanted to make sure his family didn’t miss him too badly while he was studying abroad in London.

To help them cope, the 22-year-old Tennessee native did what any selfless college student would do…

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He sent his mom a life-size cutout of himself.

“I thought maybe they’d put it in the living room corner until I got back to remember I exist,” he explained about the cutout, which came with a short note: “You’re welcome.”

But like any clever mom, Susan Talley couldn’t just stash this amazing piece of work away when it arrived about two months ago.

No, no — she had better plans in mind.

Talley decided the cardboard version of her son could be a great companion “while the real one is in Europe.” So she brought him along with her to events, like basketball games …

Can you spot cardboard Dalton in the stands?

… trips to the doctor’s office …

… and sub sandwich runs.

Fake Dalton celebrated Valentine’s Day with a fellow inanimate object.

He enjoyed playing with a furry, four-legged friend in the sunshine.

And he appreciated a good bedtime story, just like the rest of us.

The photos of fake Dalton are spreading like wildfire.

Without showing her son the photos first, Talley went ahead and uploaded them to Facebook. And after Dalton shared them on Imgur — explaining his mom “seems to be entertaining herself” while he’s gone — the story sent the Internet into a buzzy frenzy.

“The attention is crazy,” Ross told Upworthy, noting the story has gained so much traction that a restaurant featured in one of the photos, O’Charley’s, sent the family a gift card.

“I hope my mom’s holding up all right,” he said. “It’s awesome though.”

Fake Dalton has been hitting the batting cages…

… taking in some nightlife…

… and celebrated Easter with his family.

Although the viral reaction to the photos has been a bit nuts, Ross isn’t all that surprised his mom was up for a good laugh.

“Oh yeah, my mom is very funny,” he explained to Upworthy. And it’s a good thing, too: Laughter can be a great tool in improving the quality of family dynamics and boosting a loved one’s emotional health. (A student studying abroad should especially keep that in mind, considering being away from loved ones and familiarity can be tough.)

“We’re a big family of jokesters.”

Bravo, mom, for setting the bar very high ahead of April Fools’ Day.

This article originally appeared on 03.30.16

The Phoenix Suns exhausted most of their draft picks over the last calendar year making trades to bring Kevin Durant and Bradley Beal to the desert. While understandable all-in moves, the Suns spent much of this summer after acquiring Beal working diligently to try and acquire some second round picks in order to have something available to them in the form of draft capital going forward.

Having picks is crucial to not only making trades, but also having the potential to add young players to the roster on cost-controlled contracts that are much less than a veteran minimum. James Jones made a number of moves to sell off some first round pick swaps and veterans like Cameron Payne in order to get the Suns back to having six future second round picks at their disposal. Unfortunately, that total will be dropping down to five future seconds as the Suns will lose one after the league found them guilty of tampering this summer.

No, it wasn’t in acquiring Beal or Jusuf Nurkic or one of their household names. Instead, they had impermissible contact prior to free agency opening with…Drew Eubanks.

Eubanks is a nice backup big man, averaging 6.6 points and 5.4 rebounds per game last season in Portland, and he is back to backing up Nurkic in Phoenix. However, that is not usually the caliber of player you see teams tamper to get, but it does make sense given the timeline of how the Suns operated this summer. Some were surprised when the Suns pulled their qualifying offer on Jock Landale prior to the start of free agency, but they quickly signed Eubanks (among many other free agents) shortly after free agency opened. That process likely got them on the NBA’s radar, and sure enough the league determined they were in contact with Eubanks prior to when they were allowed to and now are short a second round pick for it. For most teams, that wouldn’t be a considerable penalty, but in Phoenix where second round picks are extremely valuable right now, it actually is.

The 2023-24 NBA season tipped off on Tuesday night in Denver, as the Nuggets received their championship rings and squared off with the Lakers in a rematch of last year’s Western Conference Finals.

Much like how that series went, the game was back-and-forth until it wasn’t, as Denver seized control in the fourth quarter as Nikola Jokic, Jamal Murray, and the Nuggets starting lineup dominated, scoring 21 points in a six minute stretch to ice the game, turning a 4-point lead into a 14-point edge with two minutes to play. It was not just a satisfying end to ring night for the Nuggets, but a rather emphatic statement to the Lakers and the rest of the league that they were not going have much of a championship hangover.

It was also a disappointing showing from the Lakers, who struggled in the fourth quarter despite declaring they were very much getting up for facing Denver after all the talk in the offseason — with Anthony Davis in particular being on the end of lots of jokes after he went scoreless in the second half. The Lakers took some offense to the Nuggets post-title victory lap, with coach Michael Malone leading the charge. Prior to his incredibly drunken parade speech, Malone was introduced as “the Lakers daddy” by Denver TV host Vic Lombardi, and as the fourth quarter wound down on Tuesday, Nuggets fans broke into a “Who’s Your Daddy?” chant at the Lakers.

Jamal Murray was at the scorer’s table when the chant broke out and had an incredible reaction once he figured out what fans were yelling, before pointing at Malone and making sure he knew this was his fault.

Nuggets players, wisely, have tried to distance themselves from all of that talk, with Murray noting to Malone in the clip that they have to go deal with those guys on the court. However, Malone wasn’t afraid to prod the Lakers and now Nuggets fans have a new favorite chant for when L.A. is in town, with full faith Murray, Jokic, and company can cash the checks they’re writing.

Netflix’s true crime docuseries Get Gotti chronicles the Gambino family’s rise to power under New York kingpin John Gotti in the ’80s. While most of the main players in this mob story were men, one woman managed to score plenty of screentime across the show’s three episodes for her role in helping Gotti conquer the city’s criminal underground.

Andrea Giovino became a trusted advisor to Gotti once he became head of the Gambino syndicate. In 1984, a then-21-year-old Giovino caught Gotti’s eye at a nightclub frequented by mobsters called Club A. She was invited to Gotti’s VIP area where she met the freshly installed mafia don and his henchman, Mark Reiter. Reiter was instrumental in Gotti’s heroin enterprise and he hit it off with Giovino, with the two quickly moving in together after meeting each other. According to the doc, Giovino attracted wealthy and powerful individuals thanks to her street smarts and brash personality, and she knew a lot about the mob business. Once her relationship with Gotti ended, Giovino continued to advise Gotti, becoming one of his closest confidantes despite the two rarely seeing each other in person.

Giovino’s involvement in Gotti’s dealings put a target on her back, with his enemies, and with the feds. After her arrest in 1992, and the later arrests of both her husband and her brother, Giovino decided to distance herself from the mob, breaking ties and moving to a quiet suburb in Pennsylvania as the Gambino empire began to crumble. She eventually wrote a book about her experiences with Gotti and Reiter called Divorced from the Mob: My Journey from Organized Crime to Independent Woman, and became a public speaker, hoping to help others avoid a life of crime — making her story one of the few that ends happily in the Netflix series.

(Via ScreenRant)

Travis Kelce has remained the NFL’s best tight end even as his personal life has been put under a spotlight. Kelce, the Kansas City Chiefs star who leads all players at his position in receptions (48) and receiving yards (525), is currently dating Taylor Swift, who has become a fixture at Chiefs games over the course of the season.

As it turns out, Swift attending games is quite the boon for Kelce’s stats on a given day. During the Chiefs’ 31-17 win over the Los Angeles Chargers this past week, CBS pointed out that Kelce’s numbers are much better when Swift is in attendance when compared to — their words in a terrific “Anti-Hero” pun, not mine — him being “left to his own devices.” This came up on the most recent episode of the New Heights podcast which Kelce hosts with his brother, Eagles center Jason Kelce, and apparently, he’s fully aware that his numbers are better when Swift is at his games.

As Kelce pointed out, Kansas City Chiefs coach Andy Reid is pretty happy that she’s showing up to games and helping to get the best out of his All-Pro tight end. Anyway, Patrick Mahomes said he knew during Swift’s first Chiefs game that he had to get Kelce a touchdown, and it certainly seems like that has remained the case.

Eric Andre dropped by Jimmy Kimmel Live! on Wednesday where the chaotic comedian proceeded to spin a kind of tale that you don’t usually see on the late night show. Mostly because it involved smoking toad venom and flying through an intergalactic anus.

Andre was on hand to promote his new book, Dumb Ideas, and he felt the best way to do that was telling Kimmel’s audience about his toad adventure.

“There’s a toad that lives in the Sonoran desert that hibernates for nine months out of the year in mud, and then it comes out of the mud like Martin Sheen in Apocalypse Now and it eats rats and it f—s hot other toads,” Andre told Kimmel. “It’s a big, giant toad, but if you smoke the venom off of its legs, you get high out of your mind.”

Naturally, Andre didn’t stop there and proceeded to tell Kimmel exactly how high he got. Via Entertainment Weekly:

“I sailed into the anus of the Milky Way galaxy, spun around Saturn’s rings, and had Thanksgiving dinner with God. It was unbelievable.”

The Prank Panel star explained that the toad’s venom is a “DMT derivative,” which is “a strong hallucinogenic” that has become popular in recent years. “You release it in your brain when you die, and when you’re born it’s incredible,” he said. “It’s kind of ayahuasca but on acid. If ayahuasca did acid, it’d be toad venom.”

But Andre wasn’t done yet. He wanted to make sure everyone knows exactly how to smoke toad venom in case the opportunity presents itself.

“You smoke it in, like, a little crack pipe,” Andre said. “You scrape it off the legs of the toad and you smoke it in a crack pipe and you go right into Neptune.”

Sounds…great? Thank you, Eric Andre.

(Via Entertainment Weekly)

Bad Bunny‘s latest era is showing to be promising. Upon the release of his fifth studio album, Nadie Sabe Lo Que Va a Pasar Mañana, Bunny has topped the Billboard 200 chart with the collection, and his single “Monaco” just debuted at No. 5 on the Hot 100. While Bad Bunny and Nadie Sabe Lo Que Va a Pasar Mañana may be dominating the streamers, fans are anxious to grab tickets to see him perform in person. However, given the demand for tickets to Bunny’s Most Wanted Tour, many are worried they won’t be able to see him, as tickets may be sold out.

Will Bad Bunny’s Most Wanted Tour be sold out?

While we can’t necessarily predict the future, it’s not unlikely that Bunny’s Most Wanted Tour will sell out. His previous tour, El Último Tour Del Mundo, was reported to be the fastest-selling tour since 2018, according to Billboard. The magazine reports that over 480,000 tickets sold in less than a week.

Tickets went on sale today, and it seems like they’re going pretty quickly. But luckily, resellers already have additional tickets in stock (if you’re willing to break the bank, that is).

You can see the full list of tour dates below.

02/21/2024 — Salt Lake City, UT @ Delta Center
02/23/2024 — Las Vegas, NV @ T-Mobile Arena
02/24/2024 — Las Vegas, NV @ T-Mobile Arena
02/27/2024 — Phoenix, AZ @ Footprint Center
02/28/2024 — Phoenix, AZ @ Footprint Center
03/01/2024 — San Francisco, CA @ Chase Center
03/02/2024 — San Francisco, CA @ Chase Center
03/05/2024 — Sacramento, CA @ Golden 1 Center
03/07/2024 — Portland, OR @ Moda Center
03/09/2024 — Seattle, WA @ Climate Pledge Arena
03/13/2024 — Los Angeles, CA @ Crypto.com Arena
03/14/2024 — Los Angeles, CA @ Crypto.com Arena
03/15/2024 — Los Angeles, CA @ Crypto.com Arena
03/20/2024 — Denver, CO @ Ball Arena
03/23/2024 — Minneapolis, MN @ Target Center
03/26/2024 — Kansas City, MO @ T-Mobile Center
03/28/2024 — Chicago, IL @ United Center
03/29/2024 — Chicago, IL @ United Center
03/30/2024 — Chicago, IL @ United Center
04/04/2024 — Toronto, ON @ Scotiabank Arena
04/06/2024 — Detroit, MI @ Little Caesars Arena
04/09/2024 — Washington, DC @ Capital One Arena
04/11/2024 — Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center
04/12/2024 — Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center
04/13/2024 — Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center
04/17/2024 — Boston, MA @ TD Garden
04/19/2024 — Philadelphia, PA @ Wells Fargo Center
04/20/2024 — Hartford, CT @ XL Center
04/22/2024 — Louisville, KY @ KFC Yum! Center
04/24/2024 — Tulsa, OK @ BOK Center
04/26/2024 — Austin, TX @ Moody Center
04/27/2024 — Austin, TX @ Moody Center
04/30/2024 — Houston, TX @ Toyota Center
05/01/2024 — Houston, TX @ Toyota Center
05/03/2024 — Dallas, TX @ American Airlines Center
05/04/2024 — Dallas, TX @ American Airlines Center
05/07/2024 — New Orleans, LA @ Smoothie King Center
05/10/2024 — Charlotte, NC @ Spectrum Center
05/11/2024 — Nashville, TN @ Bridgestone Arena
05/14/2024 — Atlanta, GA @ State Farm Arena
05/15/2024 — Atlanta, GA @ State Farm Arena
05/17/2024 — Orlando, FL @ Amway Center
05/18/2024 — Orlando, FL @ Amway Center
05/21/2024 — Tampa, FL @ Amalie Arena
05/24/2024 — Miami, FL @ Kaseya Center
05/25/2024 — Miami, FL @ Kaseya Center
05/26/2024 — Miami, FL @ Kaseya Center

People cannot get all of their required contemporary drama from prime minister antics. Thankfully, soap operas have been here to fill that void (and provide blood feuds) for several decades, and the long-running The Young And The Restless has been doing the thing with largely the same actors for almost all this time. Star Christian LeBlanc has been playing Michael Baldwin since the 1990s, and boy, this character has undergone a massive transformation.

Not to mention a redemption arc that doesn’t feel possible in reality, but hey, that’s Genoa City life for you. As a character, Michael Baldwin actually endured a cancer battle, too, and in an eerie twist, LeBlanc suddenly found himself facing the same fate. However, he might have never known what was happening until it was too late if fans hadn’t noticed a telling sign. As LeBlanc told New Orleans CBS affiliate 4WWL, viewers told LeBlanc, “Your eye’s a little Jim Carrey that way.” Here’s more via EW:

When LeBlanc first started experiencing symptoms on set, he wasn’t sure what the issue was.

“They put my wedding ring on, Lauren and Michael’s wedding ring, and I put my hand down and the ring fell off without friction,” LeBlanc remembered. “I said, well, what an odd thing. My nose started bleeding on set. Sometimes this eye kind of got a little wonky, because there was a tumor in the sinus cavity. If I hadn’t gone in for an eye exam, it might have progressed more. It’s a very fast cancer and that is the danger of it.”

Fortunately, that fast-moving cancer is now in remission, and both Christian LeBlanc and Michael Baldwin will live to talk to other characters while facing into the camera another day. Many more days, actually. Whew.

(Via 4WWL & EW)

Halloween is coming at us fast! You officially have less than a week to get everything in order. And while we’re sure you have the perfect costume (or costumes) picked out for all your Halloween weekend parties, don’t forget that if you have trick-or-treaters in your neighborhood they’re going to be banging on your door and ringing your doorbell looking for good candy. Very soon.

You don’t want to find yourself without the goods or you might just spend November 1st scrapping egg yolk off your windows. We know what you’re thinking, “most kids spend Halloween being ushered door-to-door by their parents — how big of a threat can they be?” But what about when they get home and their older siblings (~who maybe teleported here from 1985~) start digging through the candy only to find the Wurther’s Originals and Chick-o-Sticks? Oh, buddy, you’re screwed.

Those older kids will come for you in the late hours of the night. And, hell, in 2023 we wouldn’t put it past the parents either. So we’re helping you out by naming the candies we hate most and ranking them based on how many eggs will smack against your aluminum siding if you dare pass them out.

For every entry we’ve given each a 1-10 egg rating so you’ll know just how bad that morning-after-Halloween damage will be. Let’s dive in!

11. (tie) Fun Dip

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful:

Okay, I said we were going to be focusing on “bad candy” and I actually kinda-sorta like Fun Dip so this was a tough one to include. But let’s face it, Fun Dip is kind of the worst. Only one of the flavors is good, it gets everywhere, and it requires a separate weird flavorless piece of candy just to eat. Do you realize how much parents hate you for giving out Fun Dip? Just imagine that fine powder getting all over clothes and furniture then getting wet and turning to artificially dyed paste.

Do yourself and the poor parents of these children a favor — avoid this candy at all costs.

The Bottom Line:

The only candy that makes you wonder, “Am I better off just snorting this?”

11. (tie) Tootsie Rolls

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful:

I like Tootsie Rolls but I’ve never bought one myself. I’m convinced that every Tootsie Roll I’ve ever been offered is a leftover from the Halloween season. Once the children have eaten all the good candy, the parents are left with a bag of Tootsie Rolls, Dum-Dums, and Chick-O-Sticks and they keep them handy and offer them out for the rest of the year until some poor sap takes them up on the offer.

What are these even supposed to taste like? Chocolate-flavored plastic?

The Bottom Line:

No one’s favorite. And even in the Tootsie family, the Tootsie Roll Pop is vastly superior.

10. Hot Tamales

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful:

Ahh, Mike and Ike’s sexy cousin, the Hot Tamale — a spicy candy that tastes like…cinnamon? Look, I want to like Hot Tamales because there aren’t enough spicy candies out there in the market and I want to show the brands that it’s a candy genre they should spend more time exploring. But I can’t understand why anyone would name their candy “Hot Tamale” and then make it taste like cinnamon.

I like the sensation it provides on my tastebuds — I just find it overall pretty disappointing. Why would anyone rather have this over cinnamon gum like Big Red or Orbit Cinnamon?

The Bottom Line:

Whoever made this candy never had a tamale before. Or a metal filling they wanted to keep in their molars.

9. Dum Dums

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Imagine a lollipop but bad and you have Dum Dums. They’re small, the flavors are random (root beer, cream soda, and cotton candy? Get out of here), and they dissolve in your mouth in about five minutes.

This is the sort of candy you put in your bag only to forget you have it until months later. Then you eat it when it’s all sticky and you regret it instantly.

The Bottom Line:

These are only for candy dishes at the bank. Period.

8. Twizzlers

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

I’m going to get a lot of hate for this one but go ahead and bring it on. Twizzlers are a vastly inferior candy to Red Vines, which are softer and easier to chew, and have a better flavor.

The dominating flavor of Twizzlers is plastic. And a tiny hint of strawberry. But really the plastic is strongest.

The Bottom Line:

I know Twizzlers are insanely popular but they shouldn’t be. This is a garbage-tier candy.

7. Werther’s Original

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Werther’s Original is a tough one because I don’t think this candy is technically bad. I like the creamy caramel flavor and its gentle coffee-like notes but… I didn’t always like Werther’s. Not ’til I hit 25. What I’m trying to say is there isn’t a child alive who likes Werther’s — it’s the kind of candy you imagine your grandpa having in a bowl by his recliner.

I’m convinced that grandparents buy Werther’s just so that they have candy on hand to offer but don’t actually expect you to want any. This way they can hoard all the Werther’s for themselves.

The Bottom Line:

A good candy but a dismal Halloween candy.

6. Dubble Bubble

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

The most frustrating thing about Dubble Bubble is that for those first 30 seconds that you chew into this stuff, it actually tastes good. It has an addicting sweet bubblegum flavor to it. But less than a minute later the dominating flavor quickly becomes your own spit.

The Bottom Line:

It’s whatever (fine, I suppose) but loses flavor so fast that you’re better off never eating it.

5. Dots

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Jujyfruits, Swedish Fish, Dots — they’re all very similar, only Dots is the worst of them. Dots are nearly flavorless, they seem designed to have just enough flavor to trick you into eating another Dot, then another, and another, trying to satisfy an itch that this candy just can’t scratch.

Before you know it you’re a box deep and you’re still not satisfied.

The Bottom Line:

Don’t reach for that next Dot, it’s a trap!

4. Chick-O Stick

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Chick-O Sticks aren’t nearly as bad as they look. The primary flavor is peanut butter with a bit of coconut mixed in and a texture that is nearly identical to the inside of a Butterfinger.

Having said that, if you want to experience these flavors in harmony, you can just get a Butterfinger. Yes, you lose coconut, but you get chocolate, which pairs better with peanut butter. Most children are going to look at this near-ancient candy and just be confused. It doesn’t try to appeal in any way visually, it doesn’t look appetizing, it frankly looks pretty gross.

The Bottom Line:

Don’t be surprised if whoever you give this candy to throws it back at you in disgust and confusion.

3. Candy Corn

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Candy Corn is one of those polarizing candies that people either love or hate and I’m not sure why. You should hate Candy Corn. It’s the only proper way to feel about this weird vanilla and caramel-flavored candy.

Candy Corn is more decorative than anything. It’s a candy that visually telegraphs “it’s fall,” and that’s about all it’s good for.

The Bottom Line:

Candy Corn is awful and the people who like it are weirdos.

2. Good & Plenty

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Name one kid who likes licorice. Hell, I have a hard enough time finding adults who like it. Licorice is a weirdo old person candy that is exclusively for the type of people who get excited about saltwater taffy.

The Bottom Line:

More like Bad & Plenty. You’ll have plenty because every time you ask someone if they want some they’ll say “f*ck no.” That’s altogether too strong of an emotion to express over rejecting candy but… that’s how bad this is.

1. Necco Wafers

How Many Eggs Will Hit Your House?

Why It’s Awful

Necco Wafers are a popular choice for Worst Candy Of All Time and for good reason. This stuff is terrible.

You may not be aware but sometime in 2018 Necco Wafers were discontinued only to return in 2020. My only question is: why? Who wanted this candy back? Who is it for?

If you forced me to choose between eating Necco Wafers and Tums, I would go for the Tums every time. Do you realize how strange that is? Tums isn’t candy — in fact, eating excessive amounts of antacids can give you some serious stomach issues. Still, I’d rather risk that than eat Necco Wafers.

This awful chalky candy also features the worst set of flavors of all time: licorice, lemon, cinnamon, chocolate, wintergreen, orange, clove, and lime. Who signed off on this?

The Bottom Line:

Please find me a living human who actually likes Necco Wafers, I have a million questions for them.

Doja Cat made “Agora Hills” one of the singles from her recent album, Scarlet. In the song, she discusses her romantic feelings for a lover and how she just wants to show them off. Doja also rejects any outside thoughts because of how well she’s being treated.

And while she hasn’t spoken directly about the song’s meaning, her lyrics still make the intentions quite clear.

“Be my security, it’s your therapy / With you, I ain’t holding sh*t back / When I need my space, you give that / When he broke my heart, you fixed that,” she says. “With a long walk on the beach / Love it when they honk-honk on the street (beep) / When they see us zoom by in the Jeep (yeah) / We a whole damn joint, we a energy.”

Still, fans on Reddit’s Doja Cat subreddit were left wondering about the meaning behind the video, as one poster felt it didn’t quite connect to building an album narrative like “Paint The Town Red” and “Demons” did.

Commenters responded with their own interpretations of her “Agora Hills” visual, with one suggesting she was being “reborn” as “the new Doja” and another wondering if it references an anime.

Check out “Agora Hills” above to decide for yourself.