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People were asked why they were unfaithful and the answers are eye opening and insightful

Infidelity is devastating for relationships. When you find out a partner has been unfaithful it can feel like a bomb went off in the middle of your living room while you were just trying to drink your morning coffee. The carnage from an affair can be extensive, especially if there are children involved.

But no matter what circumstances the infidelity happened, the partner who was on the receiving end of the betrayal often wonders why? It can send some people in a spiral of shame and self blame for the actions of their partners which feel debilitating. Oftentimes, the betrayed partner never feels like they get a truthful answer from their partners but one Reddit user decided to invite partners that have strayed to explain why they cheated.

Surprisingly, many of the answers were extremely insightful seemingly showing extraordinary growth since that time in their lives. There was also a lot of remorse expressed for their previous harmful behaviors.


“When you grow up being in turn neglected and told you’re not good enough, validation is like a drug, and intimacy is the ultimate validation. Sooooo much therapy to undo this,” one person reveals.

“Insecurity. I was always on the look out for someone who would make me feel more desirable than the last. Once I grew up emotionally, I realised [sic] what a POS I was & the hurt it caused. Hard to live with tbh. Edit. Can I just make it clear I was not a serial adulterer… It was a youthful lack of judgement,” another person writes.

“Unbridled ego, unsatisfying regular sex life, and a girl who threw herself at me. I was an idiot, I acted like an a*****e, and I will regret it the rest of my life,” one commenter says before continuing. “It was a hard truth to face. It was a dark time in my life where my ego and my immaturity caused me to hurt several people I loved.”

“Because I chose a cowardly and easy path. Instead of going to therapy and ending my toxic relationship, I cheated on them with someone who I had convinced myself I was in love with, and loved me. Turns out, breaking up with someone is a lot less harmful to everyone involved than cheating,” someone else writes.

An interesting theme that someone who has experienced the pain of infidelity may notice is that there’s no blame placed on the betrayed partner. The people that answered this prompt admit that the affair was completely within their control and most say they learned from it.

Dr. Kathy Nickerson is a licensed clinical psychologist that specializes in affair recovery, she’s also the author of the book The Courage to Stay: How to Heal from an Affair and Save Your Marriage. Nickerson has teamed up with other mental health professionals to research why people have affairs and has been revealing the earliest results on her TikTok page.

One of the preliminary results falls in line with what many of the commenters were sharing on the Reddit post, a lot of people that cheat are in some sort of emotional pain.

“In our recent affairs survey, we asked over 1400 cheating partners, was an affair a painkiller,” Nickerson says, revealing that 64.8% of women and 59.9% of men agreed or strongly agreed with the affair being a painkiller. When asking “did you choose the affair to cope with emotional pain,” 68.2% of women and 70.2% of men answered in the affirmative.

@drkathynickerson

The majority of people who responded to our 2023 affair survey said that they agreed that affairs are a painkiller. When we look at this data based on gender, we see some interesting differences. What are your thoughts about this? @Rece affair recovery🦄 @Rebecca Stone #affair #infidelityrecovery #extramaritalaffair #healingafteranaffair #affairrecovery #infidelityinamarriage #cheatingwife #cheatinghusbands #infidelityrecovery #emotionalaffair #healingfrominfidelity #infidelity #infidelityadvice

In another video, Nickerson revealed that the saying, “once a cheater always a cheater” may actually be inaccurate based on the preliminary research results. According to the initial survey for cheating partners, 59.89% reported only having one affair.

If there’s one take away from the eye opening responses in the Reddit post and the early research results from Nickerson, it’s that cheating has very little to do with the person being cheated on and people don’t always cheat again. You can follow along with Nickerson’s research here, and if you’re healing from infidelity while choosing to stay partnered, you can buy her book here.

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Mom has the perfect response to teen son who refuses to do ‘girl’ chores

A 41-year-old mom with 3 boys, 12-year-old twins, and a 10-year-old, pays them $10 daily to do their chores. However, their pay is deducted $10 if they miss a day. The boys have to do their tasks 5 days a week, although it doesn’t matter which days they choose to work.

“This system has worked swimmingly for us since it started, the boys have always complied with completing their chores,” the mom wrote on Reddit.

Her 12-year-old son was getting ready to play Fortnite with a friend and told him he’d be ready in 15 minutes once he finished his chores. When the boys started playing the game, he told the friend he was in charge of dusting and sweeping the stairs, to which the friend responded, “It’s a good thing my parents don’t make me do girl chores.”

After learning what the friend said, the mom told her son that chores are genderless.


“I spoke with my son and explained to him that knowing how to clean was not specific to any gender, that it was a life skill everyone needed to know. I also told him that I understood that other families functioned differently; however, in our family, everyone did an equal share,” she wrote.

Over the next 3 days, the boy refused to do his “girl” chores. So, when allowance day came, the two brothers who did theirs received $50, but the 12-year-old who refused only got $20. The mom and the boy’s father are divorced, so the 12-year-old called his dad to complain that he got $30 less, and the dad took his side.

“My ex-husband then proceeded to call me and tell me that I’m in the wrong for only giving him $20 and to imagine how it makes him feel that his brothers got more than he did. I explained to him that our other sons actually did their chores for all 5 days, so they were rewarded accordingly,” the mother wrote. “And assured him that if he had decided to start giving the boys an allowance, then he can run allowance however he wanted, but this was ultimately the system I had come up with.”

She added that her husband said she is being “insensitive” and “humiliating” their son.

The mom asked Reddit’s AITA subforum if she was in the wrong, and the commenters unanimously agreed that she was right. Other commenters noted that she made a smart decision leaving her ex-husband because he took the side of his child, who refused to do work for sexist reasons.

The only problem the commenters had was that the mom was being a little too generous by giving them $50 a week. That’s $600 a month for 3 kids.

“It’s the real world, you don’t do your job, you don’t get paid, and I actually think $10 a day is pretty generous for allowance,” Longjumping-Gur-6581 wrote. “$10/day is insane for that age,” fIumpf added.

“You’re not taking money out of your son’s allowance, you’re not paying him for services not rendered,” Excitedorca wrote. “The sexist, misogynistic reasons behind not completing the chores need to be corrected and that won’t happen by rewarding it.”

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This Year’s ‘Secret Michter’s’ Has Officially Hit Shelves — Here’s Our Full Review

Michter’s remains one of the best premium whiskey brands out there. The secret that they’ve wisely unlocked is that you can find their core line on store shelves across the country (and the world actually) for a fair price while their elite and limited edition bottles are just barely within reach (with some just out of reach enough to be enigmatic). As such, they cover all the bases in the whiskey world with high-quality products at each of those levels that never disappoint.

Two bottles that are considered by insiders and whiskey fans alike as “secret Michter’s” fall right in the middle of the brand’s spectrum — Bomberger’s Declaration and Shenk’s Homestead. The former is a classic bourbon that’s aged in special Chinquapin oak barrels while the latter is a sour mash whiskey (blend of bourbon and rye) that highlights one of Michter’s greatest strengths — good sour mash whiskey that doesn’t need to be bourbon or rye on the label. The “secret” here is that these aren’t labeled as “Michter’s” expressions but they carry the same attention to detail in every moment of the process, thanks to Master Distiller Dan McKee and Master of Maturation Andrea Wilson. Both are revered legends in the whiskey community.

These two bottles are released once a year in the fall. Each year the batches vary, depending on how the barrels were doing that year. Moreover, these are high-end limited releases, which means that you can find these but you’re going to have to pay a larger price for them (but rarely over MSRP). Okay, that’s enough preamble, let’s get into what’s in these bottles.

Also Read: The Top 5 UPROXX Bourbon Posts Of The Last Six Months

Bomberger’s Declaration Small Batch Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey 2023 Release

Bomberger's Declaration Bourbon
Michter

ABV: 54%

Average Price: $179

The Whiskey:

This whiskey heralds back to Michter’s historical roots in the 19th century before the brand was even called “Michter’s.” The old Bomberger’s Distillery in Pennsylvania is where the brand started way back in the day (1753). The whiskey in the bottle is rendered from a very small batch of bourbons that were aged in Chinquapin oak. The staves for that barrel were air-dried for three years before coppering, charring, and filling. The Kentucky bourbon is then bottled in an extremely small batch that yields around 2,000 bottles per year.

Tasting Notes:

Nose: Sweet mashed grains — think a bowl of Cream of Wheat cut with butter and molasses — mix with sticky toffee pudding, old saddle leather, old cellar beams, and sweet cinnamon with a hint of candied orange and dark chocolate next to luscious eggnog with a flake of salt.

Palate: The palate is super creamy with a crème brûlée feel that leads to soft winter spices, dry cedar, and orange chocolates with a hint of pear-brandy-soaked marzipan in the background.

Finish: The end has a creamed honey vibe next to brandy-soaked figs and rum-soaked prunes with fresh chewing tobacco and salted dark chocolate leading back to dark chocolate and old cellar floors with a touch of smoldering orchard bark.

Bottom Line:

This is a quintessential Kentucky sipping whiskey. The pour rewards you for taking it slow, re-nosing, adding water, and letting bloom in the glass. Along that journey, you’ll find deeper notes of Christmas nutcakes, oatmeal raisin cookies, and soft senses of fall leaves in fallow orchards on a rainy day with a hint of smoldering oak. It’s a grand pour of whiskey.

Ranking:

96/100 — This is damn near perfect.

Where To Buy:

High-end liquor stores will have it behind the glass between now and the end of the year. Some stores without state control boards will charge more for it (I’ve seen it for $249 and $399 in some markets) but that’s rarer with this one.

You’ll also be able to find these at very good whiskey bars and restaurants in the U.S. and Europe especially. So grab a slow pour over a large cube and get a sense of it and then go track down your own bottle.

Shenk’s Homestead Kentucky Sour Mash Whiskey Small Batch 2023 Release

Shenk's Homestead Sour Mash
Michter

ABV: 45.6%

Average Price: $179

The Whiskey:

This whiskey is made with a fair amount of rye whiskey over a bit of bourbon in a traditional sour mash style. 2023’s release varied with the use of malted rye in the mash bill, adding an extra layer of malty depth. The whiskey was then aged in specially made toasted French oak that spent 24 months seasoning in France before they were made with barrels that spent 18 months air-drying in Kentucky before they were coppered. The barrels were all batched and bottled with just a touch of Kentucky limestone water.

Tasting Notes:

Nose: Soft boot leather, dried and candied orange, spiced Christmas cake, fresh vanilla beans, sultanas, and a hint of fresh firewood round out the nose with a hint of almost sweet oak char and simmering molasses cut with almond kissed with dark citrus oils.

Palate: The palate has a nice sweet spiciness like a box of Red Hots next to allspice, clove, and orange with rummy raisins, nutmeg-heavy eggnog, and a whisper of oily espresso bean sneaking in late before a bold yet measured winter spice bark sharpness arrives.

Finish: The end marries the orange oils to soft cedar notes with a woody spiciness next to soft notes of sweet cinnamon, stewed plums, minced meat pies, and brandied cherries layered with chewy tobacco leaves over a lush and creamy finish.

Bottom Line:

This is another great sipper. Pouring it over a rock will add even more creaminess with the almond taking on rich marzipan with a hint of rose water and even some orange blossom with a whisper of peaches and cream sneaking in. Then it jukes towards anise and almost bitter dark chocolate-covered espresso. It’s fascinatingly complex.

While I do like sipping this one slowly on a lazy afternoon, this also makes a killer whiskey-forward cocktail. Think of a dark and fun Manhattan or a really good Sazerac with a nice cognac and absinthe.

Ranking:

89/100 — This is a very good whiskey (high B+ all day!). The only knock is that water (or ice) helps this one really pop compared to the neat pour.

Where To Buy:

This is also going to be available at high-end liquor stores behind the glass. Generally speaking, this will be a tad harder to find since it’s not a “bourbon” but it should be there right next to the Bomberger’s in most cases.

You’ll also be able to get a good pour of this at a great whiskey bar or restaurant with a killer whiskey list. Great bartenders will be making innovative and fun cocktails with it too.

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‘The View’s Alyssa Farah Griffin Has Accused John Fetterman Of Acting Like Marjorie Taylor Greene

For the second time this week, John Fetterman made it into the Hot Topics section of The View, and once again, the ladies are divided on the Pennsylvania senator. Fetterman has been a prominent target for the right thanks Majority Leader Chuck Schumer loosening the Senate dress code to accommodate Fetterman’s penchant for wearing hoodies and gym shorts.

Instead of focusing on actual policy, the usual rabble-rousers like Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert have lobbed attacks at Fetterman on social media, and he’s fired right back. However, The View‘s Alyssa Farah Griffin isn’t a fan of Fetterman’s retorts, particularly his latest zinger, which involved poking fun at Boebert’s now infamous Beetlejuice groping scandal.

“I figure if I take up vaping and grabbing the hog during a live musical, they’ll make me a folk hero,” Fetterman tweeted in response to a Fox News report.

Via The Wrap:

“He spends his time on his official Senate Twitter account engaging in some, frankly, Marjorie Taylor Greene-like behavior,” Farah Griffin chided. “He’s referring to male genitalia, he’s calling Republican[s] derogatory names. And then his personal Twitter, all day, is just attacking people and trolling.”

She continued, “Congress has some things they should be doing. Why don’t we fund the government, why don’t we pass some common sense, you know, whether it’s gun reforms, let’s do things to boost the economy. Why are our senators acting like teenage girls?”

While fellow Republican Ana Navarro initially agreed with Griffin that the “decorum of the Senate” is being eroded, she ultimately defended Fetterman for giving it right back to his detractors.

“He’s not initiating any of those exchanges. He’s clapping back at stuff that people are saying to him,” Navarro said, prompting Sunny Hostin to jump in. “Everybody loves a good clapback!” she said.

(Via The Wrap)

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Where Are The ‘Dumb Money’ Characters Now?

The latest real-life story to inspire a major Hollywood production is the bizarre GameStop Short Squeeze of 2021 in which various Wall Street investors had a mini-meltdown over the popular game store where you would go for Wii games in the year 2007. Dumb Money goes in-depth on the squeeze, and the characters are all based on real people, who have since moved on from the debacle.

Dano plays Keith Gill, a real-life vlogger/avid Reddit user who would give investment advice on his YouTube channel, “Roaring Kitty.” Gill would film videos about investing from the basement of his Massachusetts home. In 2021, Gill’s investments reached $48 million in value, though it’s unclear exactly how much he made from GameStop. Now, Gill has maintained a relatively private life and had no involvement in the making of the film. Pete Davidson portrays his brother while Shailene Woodley portrays his wife.

America Ferrera portrays a woman based on real-life single mother Kim Campbell, a nurse who decided to take a chance on investing and ended up buying 100 shares of GameStop, though she didn’t make nearly as much as others.

As for the hedge fund billionaires, Seth Rogen plays Gabe Plotkin, a hedge fund CEO who now co-owns the NBA team Charlotte Hornets, so he’s doing fine. Nick Offerman portrays hedge fund honcho/GOP megadonor Kenneth Griffin, who is reportedly not too happy with his depiction in the film, though he said he would have preferred Daniel Craig.

When it comes to Robinhood, the financial service company that was used in the squeeze, co-founders Vlad Tenev and Baiju Bhatt (Sebastian Stan and Rushi Kota in the film) recently reached a settlement in a class-action lawsuit after an investigation into the stock market chaos.

Dumb Money, also starring Shailene Woodley, Vincent D’Onofrio, America Ferrera, Anthony Ramos, and Sebastian Stan, hits theaters on September 22nd.

(Via Time)

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Here Is Jawbreaker’s ‘US Tour 2023’ Setlist

The 1990s called, and they want to see punk’s resurgence. Well, thankful the decade’s legends Jawbreaker are on the road putting in the work to make that possible. Over the years, the group have come to together for a string of show or a headlining festival appearance but to some fans their latest tour takes the cake.

With several dates still on their books, if you were on the fence about heading out to see them, their setlist could change your mind. Keep scrolling to find that.

Last year during an interview with Uproxx’s Ian Cohen, guitarist and singer Blake Schwarzenbach talked about the joy touring brings him. He said, “Everything that’s ‘secondary market’ for me — we’ve played Chicago, New York, and Los Angeles a couple of times, but I find historically that the more interesting shows happen in the ‘ignored’ towns, there’s energy and appetite there. I personally love Detroit. I find it to be a fascinating city, and I have friends there, it’s not a city where bands always go. Denver, I used to live in Boulder. I’m psyched. It will be novel to be looking out at the changing landscape. I’m excited about being on the road, honestly. I love being in cars… sleeping. We’ve got books, we got each other…we got windows.”

View the setlist (according to setlist.fm) and the band’s remaining tour dates below.

1. “I Love You So Much It’s Killing Us Both”
2. “Chemistry”
3. “The Boat Breas From The Hill”
4. “Sea Foam Green”
5. “Condition Oakland”
6. “Save Your Generation”
7. “Sluttering (May 4th)”
8. “Jet Black”
9. “Parabola”
10. “West Bay Invitational”
11. “Boxcar”
12. “Jinx Removing”
13. “Basilica”
14. “Unlisted Track”
15. “Housesitter”
16. “Kiss The Bottle”
17. “Accident Prone

09/22 – Boston, MA @ MGM Music Hall at Fenway
09/23 – Camden, NJ @ 1234Fest @ Freedom Mortgage Pavilion
09/25 – Orlando, FL @ House of Blues

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Warner Bros. Wanted Christoper Nolan To Cast Leonardo DiCaprio As The Riddler In ‘The Dark Knight Rises’

With Warner Bros. set to introduce a new cinematic Batman in James Gunn burgeoning DC Universe, The Dark Knight Trilogy writer David Goyer has opened up about his experience working with Christopher Nolan on the now-iconic films.

In a sprawling interview with the Happy Sad Confused podcast, Goyer revealed that not even the Nolan films were safe from studio meddling. However, unlike the DC movies that followed, Nolan was able to hold off Warner Bros. executives who constantly tried to put their fingerprints on the Christian Bale films with wild casting ideas like having Leonardo DiCaprio play The Riddler.

“After The Dark Knight, the head of Warner Bros at the premiere said, ‘You got to do the Riddler. Leo as the Riddler. You got to tell Chris, Leo as the Riddler,’” Goyer recalled. “And that’s not the way we work.”

According to Goyer, their approach was always to figure out Batman’s story before anything else. Via Variety:

Goyer said that Nolan and him never picked villains first. Instead they would crack the story of Batman for each film and pick the corresponding villain to match that story. Bane (Tom Hardy) was selected for “The Dark Knight Rises” as the film wrestled with Batman’s age and physicality after the more intellectual warfare of Joker (Heath Ledger) in “The Dark Knight.”

Goyer did reveal one casting decision that he was against, but obviously, worked out for the best. The writer confirmed reports that he pushed for Jake Gyllenhaal over Christian Bale going into Batman Begins. Goyer has no hard feelings though because “Bale is amazing.”

You can watch Goyer talk about The Dark Knight Trilogy at the 13:47 mark below:

(Via Variety)

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Is ‘Dumb Money’ Based On A True Story?

You might think that a movie called Dumb Money featuring Pete Davidson and Seth Rogen would be a fun buddy comedy (it might be, the jury is still out) but it’s actually based on a very real story from not too long ago. Who could forget those few weeks in 2021 when everyone was randomly talking about GameStop, the preferred store of teenage boys?

Dumb Money is loosely based on Ben Mezrich’s 2021 book The Antisocial Network: The GameStop Short Squeeze and the Ragtag Group of Amateur Traders That Brought Wall Street to Its Knees. Paul Dano stars as investor Keith Gill, a YouTuber and avid Reddit user who spearheaded the GameStop stock squeeze of 2021 which caused chaos on Wall Street. A group of working-class investors short-squeezed a bunch of billionaire investors, played in the film by Rogen and Nick Offerman, and showed how the system can easily fail.

The movie highlights the power imbalance between Wall Street investors and your average working parent who managed to use the system to their advantage before the higher-ups stepped in, proving that the system is actually rigged. Even the Mormons got in on the action!

Dumb Money, also starring Shailene Woodley, Vincent D’Onofrio, America Ferrera, Anthony Ramos, and Sebastian Stan, hits theaters September 22nd.

(Via TIME)

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Who Is Featured On Kelly Clarkson’s ‘You Don’t Make Me Cry?’

Kelly Clarkson’s new album Chemistry arrived in June. The singer and television host is back today (September 22) with the deluxe version, which features an unreleased song called “You Don’t Make Me Cry,” which features a special guest.

“You Don’t Make Me Cry” is a brazen pop song that opens with Auto-Tuned vocals from Clarkson’s daughter River Rose. The track takes unexpected turns as a trap beat comes in as Clarkson sings about not letting someone have the power to make her upset anymore. “You don’t make me cry / And I cry at everything / You don’t make me feel / and I feel more than most now that says something doesn’t it,” she proclaims. It’s an interesting sound for the “Since U Been Gone” performer.

“Having chemistry with someone is an incredible, and overwhelming, feeling. It’s like you have no choice in the matter,” Clarkson said about the album in a statement. “You are just drawn to each other. This can be good and bad. This album takes you down every path that chemistry could lead you down.”

Listen to “You Don’t Make Me Cry” above.

Kelly Clarkson is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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The Rundown: Samuel L. Jackson’s British Bread Commercial Is The Best Kind Of Celebrity Endorsement

The Rundown is a weekly column that highlights some of the biggest, weirdest, and most notable events of the week in entertainment. The number of items could vary, as could the subject matter. It will not always make a ton of sense. Some items might not even be about entertainment, to be honest, or from this week. The important thing is that it’s Friday, and we are here to have some fun.

ITEM NUMBER ONE – Like this, not like that

Celebrity endorsements are tricky business. There’s a fine line one has to tippy-toe across. When done right, when the combination of celebrity and product and delivery works, it can be a hoot. Everyone’s having fun and also helping the economy. Good. Great, even. Danny DeVito seems like he’s having a blast telling everyone about Jersey Mike’s subs. But when it doesn’t click… yeesh. It feels a little sad and sometimes gross and most of the time it’s just a bummer. For everyone, too. The viewer, the celebrity, and the people trying to sell a product. No thank you.

We saw both ends of that spectrum on display this week. The good was, well, really good, and if you haven’t seen Samuel L. Jackson trading on years of playing movie badasses to sell bread for a British bakery then, buddy, please click play on this sucker and treat yourself. The next paragraph can wait. Watch it again even if you saw it earlier in the week. Just promise to scroll all the way to the bottom of this column when you’re done so I can tell you about the bears that hijacked a Krispy Kreme truck. That’s the deal.

See? Delightful. Wonderful, even. And then if you, like me, started Googling when you finished it, you discovered that the company behind it all, Warburton’s, has a history of doing it. They kind of love it. The CEO gets it. Look at this guy talk about Samuel L. Jackson.

‘Not many people can be that commanding and so charming at the same time, and I love his hilarious take on why our Toastie loaf is the real deal.’

He wasn’t done, either.

He continued: ‘Inviting the big-screen hero of Samuel L. Jackson into the business was a uniquely memorable experience, and we hope to bring some light-hearted humour to viewers at home – while reminding the nation that our Toastie truly offers our customers the best of the best.’

Nailed it, straight through. I kind of want to try this stuff now even though I live a whole ocean away and baked goods are not famous for their extended shelf life. Which, I suppose, is the whole point. Mission accomplished.

Which brings us to… well, this.

Robert De Niro will reportedly reprise his iconic “Taxi Driver” role as Travis Bickle in an upcoming Uber ad campaign.

I do not love this. Especially when you get to this part of the article.

The Oscar-winner has recently taken on several other ad campaigns — a possible consequence of the star’s costly divorces and separations from the mothers of his seven children.

“A lot of people feel like some of these classic films are his best work, and signing up to commercials is selling out a bit, but obviously he’s had a very expensive personal life,” the source said.

This is what I mean about it all being tricky. Both guys are using an image created by their acting career to sell a product. Both guys are, one assumes, getting a decent paycheck to do it. Maybe the biggest thing is the product, actually. It’s easy to root for a British company that makes silly ads about bread. It’s less easy to root for a huge Silicon Valley unicorn (who many believe to be shady at best and evil at worst) convincing an aging actor to reprise an iconic role from like 40-50 years ago. I promise I thought that before I saw this quote from Samuel L. Jackson about the bread commercial.

About working on his latest ad, the Hollywood legend said: ‘It was a pleasure to meet the man at the helm of Britain’s biggest family bakery. And what an honour to follow in the footsteps of ‘Bolton alumni’, George Clooney and Robert DeNiro.

Yup, Robert De Niro did an ad from that bakery, too. And yup, it’s lovely, too. Look.

Hmm. I guess it’s all actually not that tricky. Maybe you just need to do commercials for charming bread companies for it all to work. I’m glad we figured this out.

ITEM NUMBER TWO – HAMM

Jon Hamm in Confess Fletch
Miramax

Okay, here’s what happened. Earlier this week, I wrote a thing about how cool it is that Jon Hamm has used the juice he squeezed out of his iconic work as Don Draper on Mad Men to run around doing whatever fun and silly project his heart desired. I pegged it to his appearance in The Morning Show as a goofball techbro and his upcoming role in season five of Fargo, just because that’s what was on my mind at the time. This is how the sausage gets made around here.

But then a cool thing happened. People read the article and started reaching out to tell me their own favorite Hamm appearances. I got tweets reminding me that he voiced a talking toaster on Bob’s Burgers at the height of his Mad Men fame. I had about a dozen people tell me to watch him in Good Omens, where he plays a version of the archangel Gabriel who gets amnesia and starts bumbling around Earth, which is a very Jon Hamm thing. I even got an email from someone who has known him personally for a decade that confirmed he’s just an extremely good dude, which was nice, especially since, as you may know, people on the internet love to tell you when you’re wrong.

My favorite ones, though, were about goofy little commercials he’s been doing in Canada, in part because I was already planning on writing about celebrity endorsements this week and in part because… well.

Hamm did do a series of ads for a Canadian food delivery app called SkipTheDishes where he played a man pretending to be Canadian. “That’s kind of taken off and become its own thing,” Hamm said. “I get recognized in Canada as an honorary Canadian.”

LOOK AT HAMM.

Just a really great experience all around. For me, I mean. Because nobody yelled at me. And everyone said I was right. And I got to watch a lot of fun clips of Jon Hamm. That’s what’s important here.

ITEM NUMBER THREE – Let Vanna host the damn show

vanna white wheel
sony

Good news and bad news.

GOOD: Vanna White is returning to Wheel of Fortune even with Pat Sajak stepping down.

In June, White also closed a new deal to return as host of ABC’s Celebrity Wheel of Fortune, which, as Deadline reported at the time, involves a significant salary increase. Her contract extension for the flagship syndicated show is believed to involve a pay raise, too. A fan favorite, White has been revealing letters at Wheel’s signature puzzleboard since 1982. Amid uncertainty over her future beyond Season 41, she enjoyed a wave of support during her contract negotiations, which likely helped seal the deal for her to stay on.

BAD: They still hired Ryan Seacrest to replace Sajak instead of giving the job to Vanna. Or me. Or Joe Pera, And he’s saying stuff like this, which is mostly harmless but still annoying.

He also admitted that one of the game show’s most foundational elements is surprisingly something of an Achilles heel for him.

“Actually, I’m a terrible speller,” he admitted (on the other hand, his mother “thinks she’s a great speller,” he quips).

Seacrest qualifies, “But, on the show I’m better than on my cell phone when I type or text.”

Which I would have more to say about if reading his name didn’t immediately remind me of the time in 2010 when Sylvester Stallone spent a whole week tweeting about how he thought Seacrest could beat up Jet Li.

Which… well I guess that’s good news, too. This brings our final score on this section to:

GOOD NEWS — 2
BAD NEWS — 1

A squeaker but still a win.

ITEM NUMBER FOUR – I love this man very much and need weekly updates on his well-being

Okay, three things:

  • I love the man in this clip and need you to watch it and show everyone you know
  • It made me very happy to see a silly local news clip make the rounds on the internet again
  • I don’t actually have a third thing, I just felt like a third bullet point looked better

Moving on.

ITEM NUMBER FIVE – Octopus back

There was a big thing a little while ago about whether Amber Heard’s role in the upcoming Aquaman sequel was cut or trimmed down due to all the weird press that flooded out during her legal fiasco with Johnny Depp, and you are very welcome to look it all up and develop your own opinions about it and shout them at people (not me, please) on your website of choice (not this one, please), but I want to talk about the octopus that played the drums in the first one.

Specifically, I want to talk about this, from another interview with director James Wan.

The teaser also featured the sight of Aquaman and an octopus shooting out of the water atop a giant sea horse. Wan confirms that Arthur’s steed is Storm, who first appeared in the Aquaman comic back in the mid-’60s, while his eight-legged friend is Topo, the same octopus that was briefly seen playing the drums back in the first film. The director explains that Topo will have “a stronger presence in this film. He’s an actual character in this one.”

Okay, three things again:

  • I love this
  • I have never seen Aquaman but I have seen this short clip of the drumming octopus maybe 5000 times
  • More — perhaps all? — movies should feature a drumming octopus

I hope he ends up with an entire spinoff a few years down the line. Jon Hamm will probably be involved somehow. Maybe as the bass player in the band. As himself. In a scuba suit. Uncredited. Don’t think for one second that this isn’t a possibility.

READER MAIL

If you have questions about television, movies, food, local news, weather, or whatever you want, shoot them to me on Twitter or at [email protected] (put “RUNDOWN” in the subject line). I am the first writer to ever answer reader mail in a column. Do not look up this last part.

From Paul:

Dude, I just wanted to say thank you for being you. Everyone else was out there writing angry articles about defending Martin Short’s legacy and whatnot and you’re publishing extended excuses to post pictures of Henry Winkler holding fish he caught. Please do not change.

I am posting this email for two reasons, neither of which have to do with the compliment Paul gave me, which was very nice. Reason one: A probably not surprising number of emails I get open with the word “dude,” which I really appreciate and feel good about, zero sarcasm. Reason two: The combination of “Martin Short” and “fun pictures I like” as subjects in this email gives me an excuse to show this to you guys.

Thank you to Paul and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar for making this all possible.

AND NOW, THE NEWS

To Orlando!

Singing and dancing animatronic bears are a common sight at the Magic Kingdom theme park at Walt Disney World, but a bear that was spotted there on Monday was real and most likely looking for food, prompting officials to close some rides and attractions.

How did the bear get in, you ask?

HE PAID FOR A TICKET LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.

Thanks.

Ms. Thompson said in an email that a black bear had been spotted in a tree at Magic Kingdom, a theme park whose world-famous attractions include Cinderella’s castle and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride.

Okay, I’ll admit I read this too fast and either my hurry or sick brain or both read that to mean the bear was spotted at the castle and on the ride. Which, like, good for him. Have a day, buddy. Some people never get to go to Disney, you know?

Bears are more active in the fall because they are looking for food so they can pack on fat before winter, Ms. Thompson said. “This particular bear was likely moving through the area searching for food,” she said.

Well, okay. That makes sense. But at least this was the only time it happened this week. It’s not like there’s an epidemic brewing or anythi-…

To Alaska!

Two bears on an Alaska military base raided a Krispy Kreme doughnut van that was stopped outside a convenience store during its delivery route.

DONUT RAID

BY BEARS

BEAR DONUT RAID

The driver usually left his doors open when he stopped at the store but this time a sow and one of her cubs that loitered nearby sauntered inside, where they stayed for probably 20 minutes on Tuesday morning, said Shelly Deano, the store manager for Joint Base Elmendorf-Richardson JMM Express. The bears chomped on doughnut holes and other pastries, ignoring the banging on the side of the van that was intended to shoo them away, Deano said.

Is it weird that I read this and immediately started wondering how many Krispy Kremes a bear could eat in one sitting? And that I’ve been thinking about it ever since I read it? And that I’ll still be thinking about it this weekend?

Hmm.

Maybe.

“I was beating on the van and they’re not moving. I could hear them breaking open the packages and everything,” she said. “I was like, ‘They don’t even care.’”

Two notes in closing:

  • This lady is so much braver than I am because if I saw bears housing donuts in a truck I would extremely not start banging on the walls of that truck
  • So far, my best guess is that a bear could eat 200 Krispy Kremes in one sitting

I might go higher. We’ll see how it all shakes out.