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The January 6 Committee cold open drew some big praise from fans of Saturday Night Live, but don’t count Donald Trump among them. The one-time host of the sketch comedy show has become a huge hater of the NBC mainstay in recent years, and after another episode that took aim at his role in a coup attempt last year and the ensuing fallout, Trump decided it’s time to declare the show “over” once and for all.

The show still spends plenty of time on Trump, spending much of Weekend Update on Trump and a lengthy response to the actual January 6 Committee hearing last week. And the cold open featured James Austin Johnson showing off his Trump impersonation while on a golden toilet, swigging Diet Coke and asking whether Mike Pence is “dead yet?” as the insurrection attempt aired on live TV. It wasn’t flattering, of course. And apparently he’s had enough of all that attention.

Posting into his own personal online shout box, Truth Social, Trump said the show is not “funny or smart” and said it should probably be canceled. As Newsweek notes, this falls in line with what he typically says about things he does not like:

“I once hosted Saturday Night Live, and the ratings were HUUUGE! Now, however, the ratings are lower than ever before, and the show will probably be put to rest,’” Trump said.

“It is just not, at these levels, sustainable—A bad show that’s not funny or smart. L.M. [producer Lorne Michaels] is angry and exhausted, the show even more so. It was once good, never great, but now, like the Late Night Losers who have lost their audience but have no idea why, it is over for SNL—A great thing for America!”

Declaring something “over” happens a lot these days online, so it’s funny to see Trump become just another poster on a mostly obscure social media network made only for him. But speculation about how long SNL will continue isn’t really new these days. There aren’t many people who assume the show should be “put to rest” because they’re the subject of entire sketches, though. That’s really only Trump in that category these days.

[via Newsweek]

Meghan Markle‘s podcast, Archetypes, came out of the gate strong when it debuted on Spotify in August. It immediately beat Joe Rogan by rocketing to the top of the Spotify charts, which is no easy task given the vast size and reach of Rogan’s audience. It doesn’t hurt that she’s manage to land heavy hitters like Mariah Carey and Serena Williams, but there’s one guest who made Markle the most nervous: Paris Hilton.

Before you rush to judgment, that’s the exact problem that Markle ran into while hosting Hilton. “I told her at the beginning that I was the most nervous about her interview,” Markle told Variety. “I was embarrassed to admit it, but I’ve had a judgment about her that’s based on everything I’ve seen, and I don’t like to come from a place of judgment. But I also didn’t grow up pretty.”

From there, Markle offered what’s probably the most thoughtful and insightful analysis of Hilton ever recorded:

So much of what I ended up thinking about, when I thought about Paris, was envy and judgment — two of the most dangerous things. But then you hear about her trauma and her life and her buying into this persona. Ultimately, I told her, “I’m really sorry that I judged you.” I wanted her to be safe and comfortable. I told her I wasn’t looking for a “gotcha” moment. I want a “got you” moment, where we get you.

But that episode is not framed as a defense of Paris; it’s the humanization of her. And that’s true for everybody. I don’t care what situation you’re in — if a 16-year-old boy or girl, or a woman in the workplace, feels objectified or dehumanized because their character is misrepresented, I hope everyone listening with an open mind could come away thinking, “Could I just actually consider for a second that there’s a person there?”

Again, that’s a stunning assessment of Paris Hilton that you don’t see everyday. While Markle credits her California upbringing for helping her do the “internal work” to imagine someone else’s perspective, like Hilton, she’s also been routinely hounded by the paparazzi and the tabloids in recent years.

When you’ve gone from Deal or No Deal to literal British royalty, you get a real close look at how public narratives can form beyond your control.

(Via Variety)

Beginning this month, Prime Video will stream live musical performances following Thursday Night Football. 2 Chainz is set to host Amazon Music Live, and will also interview the performing artists.

“Every Thursday night, I’m bringing the biggest and the brightest stars in music to the Amazon Music Live stage in Los Angeles,” said 2 Chainz in a statement. “We have the people that are influencing the culture and have carved their own unique path in music, like Lil Baby, Megan Thee Stallion, and Kane Brown. Amazon Music Live is the only place to be for the official Thursday turn-up.”

Amazon Music Live will premiere on October 27, with Lil Baby performing songs from his latest album, It’s Only Me. Megan Thee Stallion will take the stage on November 3, which will coincide with her hometown team, the Houston Texans, playing against the Philadelphia Eagles. Country superstar Kane Brown will perform on November 10.

“Whether you’re a sports fan waiting for the first football game of the week, or a music fan staying up late to hear the latest drop from your favorite artist, Thursday is the biggest night for entertainment,” said Kirdis Postelle, global head of artist marketing of Amazon Music, in a statement. “With Amazon Music Live, we’ve created a new, can’t-miss series for fans to experience the most exciting new music together. For artists, this show represents a massive new stage to share their music with fans after Thursday Night Football—the biggest game of the week, airing live on Prime Video.”

Additional performers for Amazon Music Live will be announced at a later date.

Check out a trailer for the series above.

Some of the artists mentioned are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

It’s long been a common belief that fish have the memory capacity of only a few seconds. People often make fun of people with bad short-term memory by saying they have the “memory of a goldfish.”

This belief about fish spread even further after being highlighted in Disney’s “Finding Nemo” films where Dory, played by Ellen DeGeneres, has a memory that lasts only about 10 seconds. However, a new study from Oxford University may have just proved that we got Dory all wrong.

To find out if goldfish have memories, the team at the University of Oxford trained nine goldfish to swim 2.3 feet and back to get a reward. Yes, goldfish are even smart enough to be trained. All these years they’ve been swimming in circles in small bowls when we could have been teaching them to do some fun behaviors.

The researchers marked off the tank in vertical stripes every ¾ inch.

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Once the fish swam the 2.3 feet, they were given a physical cue from a researcher to turn around and swim back to where they started. If they did so, they’d receive a tasty bloodworm.

After the fish got that pattern down, the researchers changed the starting point and didn’t give any cues to turn back. Eight out of the nine fish swam the same exact distance before turning around. It seems that the fish used external cues to mark the distance and then turned around at the appropriate point. This type of measurement is known by scientists as “optic flow.”

This proves that fish actually do have decent memories.

The one thing that tripped the fish up was when the vertical stripes were moved closer together, they didn’t swim as far before turning back.

The fish also didn’t appear to use time as a way of marking distance.

“We did not find a significant effect of time on the distance travelled and the coefficient of variation in time travelled was two to three times higher than the coefficient of variation in distance estimate for most fish,” the researchers wrote. “Video analysis revealed high variation in time spent to perform the experiment within a day or a session without any apparent pattern, further supporting this hypothesis.”

This study definitely changes the way people will look at the film “Finding Dory” and how they relate to their goldfish. Remember that time you forgot to feed him? He remembers.

“Forgetful people say they have a mind like a goldfish, but that’s not fair,” Dr. Adelaide Sibeaux, who led the study at the University of Oxford, told Daily Mail. “Goldfish are clearly not stupid at all, as they have a good memory for distance based on the flow of objects passing by as they swim, like stripes on their tanks.”

“Even when I left for a week for Christmas, and came back to restart the study, they knew how to do it,” she continued.

So next time someone tells you they have the memory of a goldfish, let them know that it’s actually a compliment.

With three teams competing for playoff positioning and two teams potentially jockeying for ping-pong balls, the Southwest Division projects to be quite interesting in 2022-23. At the top, the Dallas Mavericks aim to recreate the magic of a Western Conference Finals run, with the Memphis Grizzlies looking to repeat as division champions and the New Orleans Pelicans seeking to rekindle an encouraging second-half performance a season ago.

Each of the division’s five teams has questions to answer and, in this space, we’ll shed light on one particular question that could be pivotal for the present and future.

Dallas Mavericks: What’s the plan without Jalen Brunson?

Much has been made of Jalen Brunson’s exit from Dallas, including a tampering investigation centering on his transition to New York. What’s done is done, though, and the Mavericks must proceed without the team’s No. 2 offensive option from last season. On paper, the Mavericks can simply lean even further into the Luka Doncic experience, which isn’t a bad option for a potential MVP candidate. Still, Doncic can’t play every game and every minute, and the Mavericks are short on shot creation.

Dallas does have Spencer Dinwiddie, who should have the first crack at keeping the offense afloat without Doncic on the floor or as a second-side creator. Still, Dinwiddie has battled injury issues and inconsistency in recent seasons and, simply put, the Mavericks have virtually nothing else in the way of shot creators on the roster. Dallas does have quality play finishers, both up front with Christian Wood and JaVale McGee, and on the perimeter with Tim Hardaway Jr., Dorian Finney-Smith, and Reggie Bullock. Somebody has to set those guys up, however, and the first time Doncic or Dinwiddie is unable to play could be revealing.

Houston Rockets: What do Jalen Green and Jabari Smith Jr. look like?

The Rockets don’t project as a playoff threat, especially when considering the team’s 20-win performance a year ago. At the same time, Houston does have a great deal of talent, and everything is future-facing around this organization. Depth of talent is a potential strength, including pieces like Tari Eason, KJ Martin, TyTy Washington, and Alperen Sengun. With that said, Jalen Green and Jabari Smith Jr. are the team’s headline-grabbing players, and this is a big year of evaluation for both.

Green enjoyed a solid rookie season, averaging 17.3 points per game with approximately league-average true shooting at the age of 19. As most rookies can attest, Green hit some roadblocks, but he also averaged 22.1 points and shot 38.7 percent from three-point range after the All-Star break. His ceiling is quite high on the offensive end, and it will be interesting to see if a leap is coming. Smith has a bit less pressure in year one, simply because rookies often struggle and he slipped to No. 3 in the Draft, but the pairing with Green is the basis of Houston’s current plan for the future. Smith isn’t the type of prospect that is likely to dominate the ball or put up gaudy numbers early, but if he shows signs, the Rockets will be in good shape.

Memphis Grizzlies: Can Ziaire Williams take the next step?

One of the uncertainties with the Grizzlies is how Memphis will replace the contributions of De’Anthony Melton and Kyle Anderson. Neither is a high-profile piece, but Memphis replaced veterans with rookies, and that is sometimes a jarring realization for a competitive team. Mixing the two together is Ziaire Williams, who returns for year two with real confidence.

Williams was drafted as a long-term project after struggles at Stanford, and he struggled at times as a rookie. However, Williams eventually made 31 starts in the regular season and played acceptable rotation minutes as a 19-year-old in a playoff environment. His role was small in that context, but Williams has a lot of talent and there is room for him to grow into a larger role. Memphis has enjoyed big-time prosperity with draft picks recently, and he might be the next success story in the line.

New Orleans Pelicans: How does the late-season renaissance pair with Zion Williamson’s return?

The Pelicans went 36-46 last season. On paper, that isn’t anything to be terribly excited about. However, New Orleans posted a 33-30 mark in the final 63 games, made it out of the Play-In, and took the Phoenix Suns to the brink in the first round. Some of that coincided with the addition of CJ McCollum as a steady veteran with shot creation equity, but the Pelicans had already begun to coalesce around Brandon Ingram, and New Orleans found an absolute gem in Herb Jones.

As the 2022-23 season approaches, the Pelicans now have a fantastic “problem,” and it comes with how to reintegrate Zion Williamson, who missed the entire 2021-22 season. He announced his presence with authority in 2020-21, averaging 27 points per game and shooting more than 60 percent from the field. Williamson is a generational talent, but he also shifts some roles around for New Orleans, and it will be interesting to see how Willie Green and the staff are able to shuffle things around his skill set after navigating the world without him a year ago.

San Antonio Spurs: Who creates shots offensively?

Dejounte Murray enjoyed a full-fledged breakout last season, averaging 21.1 points, 9.2 assists, and 8.3 rebounds per game on the way to an All-Star appearance. That emergence earned Murray a lot of recognition and also a ticket out of town to Atlanta, with the Spurs pivoting into a full-blown rebuild effort. That is likely the right move from a future standpoint, as Murray does not profile as the No. 1 on a great team, but San Antonio is left with a mismatched roster that presents some challenges.

San Antonio does have intriguing young talent, especially with Devin Vassell and Keldon Johnson. The Spurs do not have a player on the current roster that profiles as a No. 1 (or even a No. 2) scoring option, though, and Tre Jones is the incumbent offensive engine at the point guard spot. On the right night, the Spurs might be quite frisky, particularly with Gregg Popovich at the helm and a bunch of quality supporting players on the floor. It is still challenging to see how San Antonio is going to create high-quality offensive looks on a regular basis, and part of that comes from the lack of individual shot creation on paper.

Tove Lo, the moniker of Swedish pop star ​​Ebba Tove Elsa Nilsson, has returned with Dirt Femme, after four years between it and the release of its predecessor, Sunshine Kitty. For her devoted and large fan base, the wait was agonizing, but to hear Tove explain it, the album couldn’t exist as it does now — a blend of hedonistic self-love pop bangers and heart-on-sleeve, amazingly brave confessionals — if she hadn’t taken the time to chisel away at it like a sculptor does to their marble.

The album is a cinematic telling of fairy tales and nightmares, experiences real and imagined (and in some case, dreamt) and translated into the infectious, radiant pop that Tove Lo has become celebrated for. Dirt Femme opener and pre-release single “No One Dies From Love” plays with neon-streaked synths and a festival stage-ready chorus drenched in autotune that gives the song an undeniable emotional heft. Tove sings, “No one dies from love / Guess I’ll be the first / Will you remember us? / Or are the memories too stained with blood now?” In the world of Tove Lo, taking this as a direct retelling of a personal event may be a fool’s errand, as she explains to Uproxx. “The songs on the record that are real heartbreak songs inspired by things like me having a dream about my husband cheating on me or leaving me or something,” she says. As such, they’re less re-creations of events than a way for Tove to figure out why her subconscious operates the way it does, and how that can apply to her listeners and fans generally.

There are moments, though, that Tove has lived through specifically and is now able to write upon after years of working through the associated trauma. “Grapefruit,” the emotional core of the album, finds the artist singing unflinchingly about her struggles as a younger woman with an eating disorder, recalling counting calories and choking on her “hands all night in my sleep.” It’s a brave, powerful, and graceful moment from Tove, but one that only came after years of reflection. It serves as this album’s philosophy in practice, that triumph takes time, patience, and a helluva lot of work.

Four years, especially in the modern music industry, is a very long time between albums. Were you nervous at all about returning after all that time?

I was just paying attention and saying, “Okay, where is pop culture and the world that I am moving in, where is it going?” I want to follow that, but I also want to veer off in my own lane and I had to ask how I do that in a way that connects but still feels unique and true to me. The number one way I connect with my fans is through the songs that I write, but after two years inside and so long since my last album, they also want to know a little more about where I’ve been personally. This album reflects that.

I’m so used to making this curated world that is focused on sharing my art as a musician. But then I also wanted to show my personality, what I’m like what I’m at home just being an idiot. I felt more in touch with my fans and it’s just another part of me that is now present in the music. Tove told a story to Uproxx about sharing “Grapefruit” with her collaborator Tim Nelson. Tove says that he told her, “I’m sorry, but I don’t really listen to lyrics that often, but is this about you? Is this about your feelings? Are you okay?” Tove had to explain the backstory, and even then, he was shocked by what she had gone through, how unfazed she was by it in her retelling on the track. She responded, “Yeah, it’s because of all the work I’ve done, all the therapy.”

I think a lot of the record reflects that, there are obviously the glossy, shiny, really fun pop songs, but then there are really gritty moments too. Was that something that took you a while to stumble upon in the studio or did you come into the process thinking about that balance?

Because I had more time to write this record, I could experiment and try new things and go in a direction that maybe wasn’t what I would initially do. This album is my best one yet — though maybe I say that every time — because for the first time since my first album, I had proper time to write it and make it exactly how I wanted. I was able to rewrite and live with the songs, go back and change things and explore new worlds, methodically and sonically. I feel like with “Grapefruit,” it was so important that the rawness of emotion was there. We recorded it so many times but kept my original vocal track. That was a luxury I probably couldn’t afford on previous records due to time.

Did it take more out of you to get to that place where you were comfortable sharing a song as vulnerable as “Grapefruit?”

My music is my most honest place and somehow I just have never touched on this. I feel like I’ve mentioned it in passing, how I used to hate my body as a teenager so it’s really amazing to love it now, but that’s as far as I’ve gone. I just needed long enough to be free from that disease to be able to write about it, and now it’s been 10 years of me being healthy.

Sometimes I get so mad at my younger self for putting myself through that during such crucial years of my life, because it just taints everything. What finally became this trigger was when I shot a movie in Sweden I had to lose some weight for the role. It wasn’t anything crazy, but I had to lose a lot of weight in a short time. I went on a diet for the first time in 10 years, a crazy diet. It just brought me straight back into those feelings that I hadn’t felt in a really long time.

I lost the weight, I did the movie, and then I went back to my regular place, my body just kind of adjusting back. Being able to do it made me think, “Oh my god, I am good. I could go through that and not fall back into old behavior.” That’s such a win on my end, and so I think that also sparked the need to write about it.

It’s obviously an anthem that I think a lot of your younger fans can find inspiration and hope in.

I hope so.

There are a lot of cinematic references in this record. Do you generally look to other sorts of art for inspiration for your songs or was this directly inspired by being inside for so long while writing?

I feel like it’s probably the latter, though I do get a lot of inspiration from art, books, and movies. I guess the best way to phrase it is that I write about myself, but I picture these stories cinematically in my head. The songs on the record that are real heartbreak songs are all inspired by things like me having a dream about my husband cheating on me or leaving me or something, then I wake up and I’m mad at him. It’s not logical, but that’s just the emotional person I am. Then I write a song about it and that’s how I deal with it, almost as if it’s a movie.

But I think there are also actual movies playing out in this record, of course. That is a product of being locked inside and watching a lot of things. By that same token, the reason why a lot of it’s so dancey is because I was just so missing the dance floor as well. It’s interesting looking at all the records and I’m like, “That’s when I was going through that, that’s when I was going through that,” and it’s just the storyline of my emotional life.

Lastly, how would you define the album title, Dirt Femme, if someone came up to you on the street and asked what it was about?

I would say that Dirt Femme is how I identify, and it’s explaining my relationship with my femininity and how it’s helped and hurt me. This album means a lot to me, because I’m showing the whole human. It can be quite contradicting at times, but that’s how human beings are. What else would I say? That it’s the best album ever, and you should listen to it.

Dirt Femme is out now via Pretty Swede Records. Get it here.

The Los Angeles Lakers struggled mightily to hit shots in their 123-109 loss to the Golden State Warriors on Tuesday night. Particularly, Los Angeles went 10-for-40 from behind the three-point line, with LeBron James (3-for-11) and Kendrick Nunn (3-for-6) connecting on more than one triple. Despite getting a number of good looks, the Lakers just could not punish the defending champions.

This probably should not be a huge surprise, as the team’s roster doesn’t exactly have a ton of guys who are known for their ability to consistently hit threes even though conventional wisdom says those are the sorts of dudes you want alongside James. And after the game, the former league MVP discussed how the Lakers are assembled, and bluntly stated that shooting is not one of their strengths.

“I think we’re getting great looks, I think it also could be teams giving us great looks,” James said. “To be completely honest, we’re not a team that’s constructed of great shooting, and that’s just what the truth of the matter is. It’s not like we’re sitting here with a lot of lasers on our team, but that doesn’t deter us from still trying to get great shots. When you get those opportunities, you take them, but we’re not sitting here with a bunch of 40-plus career three-point shooting guys.”

Last season, the Lakers connected on 34.7 percent of their attempts from behind the three-point line, the 22nd-best mark in the league.

Billie Eilish is returning to her hometown of Los Angeles for two newly-announced encore performances of her Happier Than Ever, The World Tour. Earlier this year, she embarked on a world tour in support of her 2021 sophomore album, Happier Than Ever, kicking things off in New Orleans in February. She will be playing two nights at the Kia Forum on December 15 and 16 to close the chapter of this tour… and potentially, the entire album era.

“LA i am so excited to see you one last time for the year!!! playing two extra final shows for you at the forum!!!” Eilish shared the announcement on Instagram. She wrapped the Australia and New Zealand leg of the global tour last month, giving her a short break before giving a proper farewell in December.

Throughout Eilish’s massive tour, she released a small EP titled Guitar Songs in July, which featured acoustic tracks “TV” and “The 30th” — both of which she’s begun incorporating into the live show setlists.

Presale for Eilish’s two nights at the Kia Forum begins for those registered with Ticketmaster’s Verified Fan Program on October 25. General on-sale opens to the public the day after, on October 26. More information about how to purchase tickets is available here.

Ever since WandaVision dropped in the middle of surging pandemic numbers, creating the perfect atmosphere for Marvel fans to concoct absolutely wild theories, speculating about Mephisto‘s presence in the MCU has never once stopped. People were seriously convinced they spotted him in a Spider-Man: No Way Home poster, and it got to the point where the director of Loki had to come right out and say he’s not in that show either, please calm down.

However, it looks like those theories could be coming to an end. Marvel is reportedly pulling the trigger on bringing the comic book devil into the MCU, and they may have found one hell of an actor for the part: Sacha Baron Cohen. The Borat star will reportedly appear in the Disney+ series for Ironheart, who’s set to make her MCU debut in Black Panther: Wakanda Forever.

Via Deadline:

A source close to the production confirmed to Deadline that there is talk on the set about Cohen being part of Ironheart, likely playing Mephisto. He also has been spotted at the Marvel facilities located at UK’s Pinewood Studios. Reps for Marvel and Cohen have refused to comment on any Cohen involvement in Ironheart or the larger MCU.

As Deadline reports, Cohen’s Mephisto will appear in multiple projects “like with any major Marvel characters.” More specifically, Cohen is rumored to appear in the upcoming WandaVision spinoff centered on Kathryn Hahn’s Agatha. That series is now named Agatha: Coven of Chaos after being previously announced as Agatha: House of Harkness. If true, seeing Hahn and Cohen chew scenery together is already devil magic in our book.

(Via Deadline)

If you type “Jeffrey Dahmer” into Google, one of the first suggested results is “Jeffrey Dahmer costume.” Due to the popularity of Netflix’s Dahmer series, there will be plenty of people who think it’s clever and funny to dress up as one of America’s notorious serial killers, someone who murdered seventeen people, for Halloween this year. But those edgelords won’t be able to find their Dahmer costume on eBay.

BuzzFeed News reports that eBay has “banned the sale of costumes inspired by the serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer in the run-up to Halloween, for violating its policy on violence and violent criminals.” The online auction site is “actively removing these listings.”

Items that have been posted on eBay include an orange jumpsuit with a face mask based on actor Evan Peters’ portrayal of Dahmer in the Netflix series Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story, and glasses that resemble the ones worn by Dahmer.

As of publication, there are only two results for “dahmer costume” on eBay: glasses and a wig. Amazon has more options, although nothing with Evan Peters-as-Jeffrey Dahmer’s face, but why spend $16.95 on a Hot Topic circa 2002-era “If You Can’t Beat ‘Em, Eat ‘Em” shirt when you can get a complete “The Hangover Alan Deluxe Costume Set” for $64.95? Or better yet, go as Matthew Berry saying “New York City” on What We Do in the Shadows. That’s something everyone can enjoy.

(Via BuzzFeed News)