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Fast food is designed to be the ultimate convenience. It’s fast, cheap, and most restaurants don’t even require you to leave your car to get your food. But above all else, it’s curated. Almost every fast food menu has numbered combos, prepared food combinations designed to help you make a decision even easier. But as convenient as fast food menus are, they’re also, in 2022, pretty damn huge. Not Cheesecake Factory huge but the typical fast food menu can have as many as 10 different food combinations! Deciding on where to eat is hard enough, but then you roll up to the drive-thru and have to choose between a chicken sandwich, a double cheeseburger, a salad, a sandwich, or whatever the hell you want to classify a Jack in the Box Munchie Meal as?

Despair not! We’re here to help!

We’ve eaten a ton of fast food, from every Taco Bell taco and chalupa to all the side options at your favorite fast food joints, and in this journey, we’ve become intimately familiar with every combination of food at just about every major fast food chain. So to make your fast food lunch journey totally stress-free, we’re going to shout out the absolute best combo meal at each fast food restaurant. In the event a menu doesn’t have combo meals, we’ll make one for you.

Our hope is the next time you find yourself in your favorite fast food drive-thru, you can consult this list and find the best bang for your buck. Let’s dive in!

Arby’s — Diablo Roast Beef Sandwich Meal

I know this is a bit of a controversial choice considering it’s not part of the permanent menu, but if you haven’t had Arby’s Diablo Roast Beef Sandwich, remedy that immediately. Not only do you get what Arby is best at: a cheddar-topped roast beef sandwich, this limited edition item adds Diablo BBQ sauce, spicy seasoning, and freshly diced grilled jalapeños to the mix — making this legitimately one of the spiciest sandwiches you’ll ever eat.

It’s meaty, smokey, savory, a bit sweet, and spicy to the point that it’ll produce sweat on your brow. Arby’s doesn’t get better than this. Add to this order a side of onion and garlic-y curly fries and the beverage of your choice (Coca-Cola, every time, or a milkshake if you can’t handle the heat) and you’ve got the best meal from Arby’s your money can buy.

The Bottom Line:

Arby’s Diablo Roast Beef sandwich is a new limited-time-only menu item, but it’s easily the best Arby’s has ever tasted. Not only does Arby’s have the meat, but they also got the heat as well.

Find your nearest Arby’s here.

Burger King — BK Bacon and Swiss Cheese Royal Crispy Chicken Meal

I’ve covered a whole lot of Burger King and my conclusion is that of all the fast food restaurants, this is the one that needs the most help. From the fries to the signature burgers, everything out of Burger King is pretty sub-par, with one exception: The Ch’King sandwich.

Launched in 2021, the Ch’King was made in response to Popeyes and, while it’s not nearly as good as the GOAT, it’s still a pretty solid chicken sandwich in any of its many forms. The best iteration of the Ch’King is currently the BK Bacon and Swiss cheese Royal, which features a thick and tender hand-breaded breast filet topped with savory royal sauce, Swiss cheese, bacon, lettuce, and tomato.

The chicken is juicy and meaty, with a well-seasoned breading that combines black pepper and garlic, and onion powder, with a slice of melted Swiss providing some sweet nutty notes, and crispy bacon bringing some smoke in.

The tomato and lettuce are almost inedible, but they add a nice texture to the overall mouthfeel and the occasional juicy burst of freshness. Couple this meal with some fries and a Coca-Cola and you’ve got the best BK has to offer.

The Bottom Line:

Burger King doesn’t do a whole lot right, but the Ch’King sandwich is in a class by itself. The full meal is the money you’ll ever spend at Burger King.

Find your nearest Burger King here.

Carl’s Jr — Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger w/ Crinkle Cut Fries

Hands down, the Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger is Carl’s Jr.’s best burger. They could ditch every other burger on the menu and keep only this one and it would still be worth a trip to Carl’s. It’s beefy, smokey, savory, crunchy, tangy, and sweet — a medley of complimentary and contrasting flavors that make each bite an unforgettable experience.

Also come on, fried onion rings in a burger? That should be a fast food standard.

Pair that smorgasbord of sensations with the garlic and onion-forward flavor of the Criss Cut fries and you have a nearly perfect, incredibly indulgent meal. This is fast food at its finest.

The Bottom Line:

Pairing a Western Bacon Cheeseburger with an order of Criss Cut fries is a guaranteed good meal. It delivers the sort of decadent salty and indulgent experience that only fast food can deliver.

Find your nearest Carl’s here.

Chick-fil-A — Spicy Deluxe Combo w/ Waffle Fries & An Autumn Spice Milkshake

Chick-fil-A’s Spicy Deluxe is the infamous restaurant’s best sandwich. It’s perfectly seasoned with a mix of smokey paprika, cayenne pepper, salt, garlic, onion, and black pepper, with a slice of melted pepper jack cheese providing an extra kick of spice and a creamy finish. It is hands down one of the best spicy chicken sandwiches in all of fast food and yes, I’m going to say it, better than Popeyes spicy chicken sandwich (Popeyes OG is still the GOAT though).

Pair this near-perfect sandwich with some waffle fries and the seasonal Autumn Spice Milkshake and you won’t be disappointed. The Autumn Spice milkshake is a seasonal fall drink that combines brown sugar spice with Chick-fil-A’s thick and rich vanilla soft serve. What do you do when the Autumn Spice isn’t on the menu? Default to the other seasonal milkshake, the peach!

Chick-fil-A’s sandwich isn’t dangerously spicy, so it shouldn’t ignite your taste buds. But if it might you have a nice cool milkshake to wash everything down with.

The Bottom Line:

You only have a few more months to be able to experience this combination of flavors, so head to Chick-fil-A ASAP.

Find your nearest Chick-fil-A here.

Chipotle — “The UPROXX” Custom Burrito

Chipotle doesn’t have combos, making it one of the most frustrating restaurants for indecisive people. Let us make your life easier. We did a whole article series about how to order the best Chipotle burrito, taco, and bowl, but if you want the best of the best, you have to go burrito.

Here is the build: pinto beans, white rice, barbacoa, tomatillo red salsa, cheese, lettuce, and guacamole. The experience will smack your taste buds with an intense burst of heat that fizzles out into earthy and creamy flavors and ends with a touch of sweetness.

It may sound bare bones, but trust us, not only will this be the best Chipotle burrito you ever eat, but the employee helping you will actually be able to fold it without having to bust out an extra tortilla to wrap it all together, meaning it won’t come apart on you as you eat it.

Pair this burrito with a side order of chips and guacamole and you’ve got the perfect chipotle meal.

The Bottom Line:

Chipotle gets a lot of flack for being some of the least flavorful Mexican food on the planet, but our burrito build fights against that very fair criticism by prioritizing simplicity.

Find your nearest Chipotle here.

KFC — Two Piece Drum & Thigh Combo

KFC’s best combo is its simplest. Just two pieces of juicy Original Recipe fried chicken with a side of mashed potatoes and gravy, and the beverage of your choice. We’re highlighting the leg and thigh because dark meat is always juicier than white meat, but it’s important that you order Original Recipe over Extra Crispy.

Original Recipe gives your tastebuds 11 herbs and spices to enjoy, including thyme, rosemary, oregano, pepper, onion, and garlic. What do you get with Original Recipe? Salt. That’s it.

All of KFC’s sides are kind of subpar, but there is something special about taking a chicken leg and dunking it in a bowl of savory, rich, and buttery mashed potatoes and gravy. It’s the whole reason KFC’s Famous Bowl exists, which is delicious but isn’t quite as juicy and satisfying as the bone-in bird.

The Bottom Line:

It’s the first combo on KFC’s menu because it’s the best tasting and most essential. Don’t overthink it, just get it.

Find your nearest KFC here.

In-N-Out — Double Double Combo w/ Grilled Onions & a Root Beer Float

In-N-Out has just three combos on the menu going from the best, the Double Double, to the worst, the Hamburger. With the Double-Double you get two tiny patties of salty ground beef melded together with fast food’s greatest-tasting American cheese. Make sure you ask for grilled onions to add some savory caramelized sweetness to each bite.

In-N-Out burgers are incredibly small, this is probably the only double cheeseburger in fast food that you can eat without slipping into a food coma after. So what do you do with all that extra room in your stomach? Explore the Secret Menu with an order of Animal-Style fries (more cheese and onions!) and a Root Beer Float.

The Bottom Line:

Not just the best order on the entire In-N-Out menu, one of the best orders you can ever hope to eat in all of fast food.

Find your nearest In-N-Out here.

Jack in the Box — Sriracha Curly Fry Burger Munchie Meal

Jack in the Box, like Taco Bell, is a stoner’s paradise. This is the sort of fast food chain you stumble into after a late night when you have zero inhibitions and you feel like taking your tastebuds and stomach on an absolute ride.

No meal is going to help you achieve that like this monstrosity. A combination of a sriracha-doused cheeseburger stuffed with a small order of curly fries between a split top bun with an order of Jack in the Box’s weird-ass tacos, and a mix of curly and regular fries with a small drink. It’s salty, spicy, greasy and yes, it will turn your stomach in a few hours — but goddamn will it be worth it.

How do you elevate the meal even further? Ditch the soda that comes with it and get an Oreo Shake instead. Why? Because you only live once!

The Bottom Line:

It’s nearly 2000 calories and who knows how much sodium, it will undoubtedly take a year or two off your life but, who cares? Everyone should experience this at least once, preferably high, drunk, or under the influence of something.

Find your nearest Jack in the Box here.

McDonald’s — Double Cheeseburger w/ Fries & a Coke

This isn’t actually a combo at McDonald’s, it’s a combination of value menu items but there is just something so good about a meal that tastes this flavorful for under $5. Sure it’s not a Big Mac or a Quarter Pounder, but it has that unmistakable McDonald’s flavor. Nothing in this burger taste like what it is, the pickles don’t just taste like pickles, they taste like McDonald’s pickles. That combination of mustard and ketchup? It has this unmistakable flavor that just screams “McDonald’s” so loudly that you could pick it out in a blind taste test with ease.

The meat patties here might be thin but that’s actually this burger’s strength, McDonald’s meatier burgers may offer a more satisfying meal but it’s a lot easier to taste just how mediocre McDonald’s meat is. It’s grainy, dry, and over-salted, but with the Double Cheeseburger, you can hardly tell.

Especially if you cram your burger with some fries! Wash it all down with McDonald’s suspiciously delicious coke and you have an answer as to why fast food is as beloved as it is.

The Bottom Line:

A testament to how delicious cheap fast food can really be.

Find your nearest McDonald’s here.

Popeyes — Chicken Sandwich w/ Cajun Fries

If you’re going to Popeyes you have to get the best chicken sandwich in all of fast food. Is the sandwich overhyped? Absolutely. Taking a bite isn’t going to change your world, but the general public went nuts for this chicken sandwich for a reason — it truly is fast food’s best.

The chicken is tender, juicy, and well-seasoned, with just a hint of sweetness that is even better accentuated when you pour a dab of honey on it. The only thing better than Popeyes’ Chicken Sandwich is the Popeyes Megan Thee Stallion Hottie Chicken Sandwich, which is the same chicken sandwich doused in a sweet and spicy sauce.

That sandwich was unfortunately a limited-time affair, but the OG is still good enough to hold the crown for fast food’s best chicken sandwich. Pair this delicious sandwich with a side order of cajun fries and you can’t go wrong. Popeyes’ best menu item with its all-time best side order.

The Bottom Line:

It’s the GOAT for a reason. This meal combines the best Popeyes has to offer in a single combo.

Find your nearest Popeyes here.

Rally’s/Checkers — Fry Lover’s Double Combo

Let’s be real, the reason anyone goes to Rally’s/Checkers is for the fries. The Big Buford? It’s good. The Mother Cruncher? Maybe the best name for a chicken sandwich ever. But the real star of the show is those weird crispy seasoned fries. They have a light and airy seasoned batter housing buttery molten potato inside. They’re near-perfect fries, and you’re probably going to end up shoving them into your burger or sandwich anyway so you might as well let Rally’s do it for you.

The Fry Lover’s burger features two beef patties, two slices of American cheese, tomato, red onion, dill pickles, and ketchup with a layer of fries on top of it all. And the best part about it is that you still get a side order of fries to go along with your burger.

The Bottom Line

It’s one of the few fast food combos that attempt to give you everything you could ever want.

Find your nearest Rally’s here.

Raising Cane’s — The Three Finger Combo

It was kind of tough to decide on a single best order at Raising Cane’s because the chicken chain has just one product: chicken tenders. Even their chicken sandwich is just three chicken tenders between a bun! So why did we decide on the 3 Finger Combo? Because it’s the perfect portion.

You get three wonderful fresh never-frozen chicken tenders with a side of average crinkle-cut fries, a slice of Texas toast, and a drink of your choice (get the lemonade). If you really like Cole slaw — what’s wrong with you? — go ahead and get the Caniac Combo which will score you an additional chicken tender and a side of coleslaw to go along with your fries and Texas toast.

Your last option is the Box Combo which is ridiculously huge, giving you six tenders, two pieces of Texas toast, Cole slaw, and extra fries. It’s enough to split between two people. The Three Finger Combo on the other hand hits that Goldilock’s zone.

The Bottom Line:

Aside from ordering the sandwich, you can’t really go wrong with Raising Cane’s combo options. The Three Finger Combo will get you the perfect portion of everything.

Find your nearest Raising Cane’s here.

Shake Shack —Double Shack Burger & A Seasonal Shake

What makes Shake Shack special is the proprietary Pat LaFrieda butcher blend that makes up their beef. It’s the reason why Shake Shack’s meat patty tastes different from every other meat out there in the fast food realm. It’s gourmet, and decidedly not fast food.

It’s delicate, sumptuous and practically melts in your mouth. But everything else at Shake Shack? It’s like they’re not even trying. Don’t muddy this delicious burger with something as disgusting as Shake Shack’s weird crinkle-cut fries. You may be looking to the cheese fries thinking that’ll liven them up, but it won’t, they’re awful too, unless you really like movie theater nacho cheese sauce.

Keep it simple and order a Double Shack Burger and a milkshake and bathe your taste buds in luxuriousness. We’d pick a specific milkshake but the Shack constantly rotates their best flavors every three months or so. Right now the shake menu includes an Apple Cider Donut shake, a Pumpkin Patch shake, and Choco Salted Toffee. Each of those sounds better than vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry, so always go seasonal!

The Bottom Line:

It might feel weird to eat a cheeseburger without a side of fries, but hey, now you have an excuse to get a Double.

Find your nearest Shake Shack here.

Taco Bell — Mexican Pizza Combo

Two Crunchy Beef Tacos and a Mexican Pizza, how can you go wrong? This combo brings together all of Taco Bell’s best foods into one meal. What do you do when the Mexican Pizza leaves the menu again, which it probably will? Just order a grip of crunchy tacos.

The Crunchwrap, the Beefy 5-Layer, and the grilled burritos are good too, but the crunchy taco is Taco Bell at its finest.

The Bottom Line:

Taco Bell has a big menu, but let’s be real. The beans are bad, and tortillas are gummy, and most of the meat options outside of ground beef are dry and low quality. The best things from Taco Bell are fried.

Find your nearest Taco Bell here.

Wendy’s — Baconator, Fries & A Chocolate Frosty

Wendy’s best cheeseburger is the Baconator. It’s a mountain of meat, two thick quarter-pound beef patties, two layers of crispy bacon, mayo, and a light buttery bun. There is no room for lettuce or tomato here, it’s all about the meaty flavor, and since Wendy’s doesn’t use frozen ground beef and has probably the best bacon in all of fast food, this thing delivers on the flavor.

The fries are fine, what’s going to make them delicious though is dipping them into that chocolate Frosty. Suddenly you’ll turn some mediocre French fries into a flavor bomb of sweet and salty sensations. The perfect indulgent treat to sit alongside your decadent Baconator.

The Bottom Line:

This is the sort of meal you eat when you really want to treat yourself. It’s fatty, salty, sweet, and indulgent. That said, it’s not a simple lunch you order during a 30-minute to hour-long break unless you can work through a massive food coma.

Find your nearest Wendy’s here.

Singer, songwriter, and producer Finneas revealed that he crashed his bicycle last Friday (October 21).

He shared the news in an Instagram post, in which he revealed that he flew over the bike’s handlebars and injured his collarbone, and sustained a radial head fracture to his right elbow.

“The severity of the displacement of my collarbone meant I required surgery,” Finneas said in the post’s caption, “which I am now on the other side of and I’m feeling great! I want to give an enormous thank you to Dr. Brian Lee who performed the surgery, Dr. Neal Elattrache and everyone at Kerlan Jobe for their incredible treatment I feel so privileged to have received. I’d also like to thank Jonathan Erb PT for guiding me through the treatment process as well as the ongoing process of physical rehab I now face. I also want to thank my family for their support and love, and most of all Claudia for dropping everything to take care of me the second this happened. She has been an Angel through all of this.”

Elsewhere in the post’s caption, he said he was not wearing a helmet at the time of the crash — “Lesson forever learned.” Thankfully, he appears to be making a smooth recovery, and if he continues to do so, he will still perform at his sister, Billie Eilish’s shows at Kia Forum in Inglewood in December.

Maren Morris is not letting any hate get to her. Back in September, the country music star was labeled a “Lunatic Country Music Person” by Fox News after she called out Jason Aldean’s wife, Brittany, over transphobic comments she made on Instagram. More than a month later, Morris has found herself in a meme.

In the latest of several Spirit Halloween costume parody images trending online, a costume called “Lunatic Country Music Person” features Morris at the center. The costume comes with some nifty accessories, including a tambourine, inclusive fans, a pickleball paddle, a wig, and beef with transphobes. Note: a tall guy is not included with the costume.

Morris caught wind of the meme and took time to wish her fans a happy spooky season.

“I didn’t commission this but I do acknowledge it,” she said in a tweet. “Happy Halloween, lunatics.”

Morris has long been outspoken in her support of the LGBTQ+ community, and this isn’t the first time Morris has acknowledged the “Lunatic Country Music Person” label. When Fox News first called her this, she took a screenshot of the news frame with “Lunatic Country Music Person” on the ticker, and changed her default picture on some of her social media channels.

There’s something about baby animals that makes you want to pick them up and squeeze them, and Nibi is no different. She’s a 5-month-old baby beaver who seems to have a bit of a sore spot for her roommate Ziibi, according to the Newhouse Wildlife Rescue. The two beavers share an area in the rescue and Nibi was getting free time outside of her enclosure after displaying “good behavior” toward her roommate.

Turns out having two beavers is similar to having two children that share a room, someone always wants the other out so they can have the room to themselves. While Nibi was waddling around the room at the wildlife rescue, Ziibi was enjoying her time at the semi-aquatic enclosure unaware that her sassy roommate had devised a devious plan.

Nibi got to work as soon as the coast was clear and started piling sticks up in front of the door that Ziibi just left to ensure the equally adorable roommate couldn’t get back in. The chubby little beaver was extremely proud of herself when she managed to get the last stick in place after she dropped it on her way to build the dam of solitude.

Beavers can hop when they’re excited because that’s exactly what this furry girl did, and people on the internet cannot get enough of her scheming shenanigans.

The video has racked up more than 9.5 million views on the Newhouse Wildlife Rescue’s Facebook page and 16,000 comments. So many commenters could not get over the little hop she does at the end. Newhouse Wildlife Rescue explained to CNN that beavers build dams instinctively, but I have a feeling they don’t normally build them to “lock out” their foster sisters.

The video is adorable and you get to see Nibi in all of her sassy glory during the interview. Check it out below.

Saving the best for last, Bernard the Elf pops up in the closing moments of this charming trailer for the new Disney+ series extending the Santaverse. Breathe easy, Bernard stans. The Santa Clauses has you covered.

Tim Allen once again stars as jolly ol’ Saint Nick, having taken over for the Big Man all those years ago when he fell off a roof. He’s now firmly ensconced in North Pole life with a Mrs. Claus (Elizabeth Mitchell) and two children, but he’s facing a Boomer crisis. Here’s the official synopsis:

It certainly feels like heavy-duty stout season, as the leaves crunch under feet and frost glistens in the mornings. While standard dry stout is all about that spring rebirth (and St. Partick’s Day), imperial stouts tend to lean more into fall and winter vibes, thanks to a flavor profile bursting with dark spices, marzipan, bitter dark chocolate, toasted coconut, and meaty dried fruits (amongst tons of other flavor notes). And there’s really no better example of that than Goose Island’s yearly and highly coveted Bourbon County Stout series.

Below, I’m going to rank all seven bottles of the 2022 Bourbon County Stout lineup. I was lucky enough to taste these with the Goose Island team this year. It was a great source of insight into this very special lineup of beers that carry serious bourbon whiskey notes. Incidentally, this year’s lineup also celebrates the 30th anniversary of Bourbon County Stout.

Beyond the tasting notes provided below, I’ll also be ranking these expressions according to what tastes the best. Spoiler alert: These are all pretty great, especially if you’re looking for a bourbon-forward stout experience. Look at it this way, this ranking is more to guide your hand when you’re in the beer store and actually come across one of these bottles, which admittedly are often rare finds. That also means the price of each of these bottles is going to vary pretty wildly since Goose Island doesn’t suggest a retail price. So you might be able to find them from anywhere between $11 and $30 a bottle this year and into the hundreds of dollars for the same bottles by 2023.

I will warn you, as well, that if you’re not an avid whiskey or bourbon drinker, then some of these might hit a little hard on the palate. Each one has a high ABV (above a standard bottle of wine) and often is best enjoyed shared with a friend next to a nice backyard fire under some flannel with some hot dogs and marshmallows roasting on the end of sticks. Let’s dive in.

Also Read: The Top 5 UPROXX Bourbon Posts Of The Last Six Months

• We Blind Tasted A Whole Bunch Of $30-60 Bourbons To See If Any Could Beat Weller
• We Put A Whole Bunch Of Bourbons To A Giant Blind Test And Discovered Some Absolute Gems
• We Blind Tasted Classic Bourbons And Were Shocked By The Winner
• The Best-Known Basic Bottles Of Bourbon, Blind Tasted And Ranked
• All The Double Gold-Winning Straight Bourbons From This Year’s San Francisco World Spirits Competition

7. Goose Island Bourbon County Coffee Stout

ABV: 13.2%

Average Price: $12-$20 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This brew integrates Intelligentsia’s Turihamwe (which means “together”) coffee blend from Burundi. The coffee has a clean and sweet edge that imbues itself into the stout as it ages in the bourbon barrels.

Tasting Notes:

Dark chocolate-covered coffee beans lead to creamy espresso and a hint of drip filter coffee on the nose next to rich caramel maltiness with a hint of spicy nuttiness. There’s a clear sense of freshly brewed coffee throughout the palate that leans toward mocha lattes and creamy dark chocolate bars just touched with cinnamon and clove. The end is full of more bitter coffee and chocolate with hints of spices, nuts, and vanilla pods.

Bottom Line:

This is probably the most one-note of the bunch. It’s great if you’re looking for a coffee boost but that’s about it. Look, it’s well-made and drinkable but unless you really want a coffee-bomb stout, it’s a bit monotone.

6. Goose Island Bourbon County Proprietor’s Stout

ABV: 13.4%

Average Price: $15-$30 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This beer is a nod to Chicago’s cocktail scene. The idea was to mimic the flavor notes in a Jungle Bird Cocktail — a 1970s tropical shaker with blackstrap rum, Campari, pineapple juice, lime juice, and demerara syrup. To do that, the brewers added banana, coconut, lime, and pineapple into the bourbon barrels before aging.

Tasting Notes:

The tropical fruits really pop on the nose with a clear sense of grilled pineapple next to Almond Joy candy bars, banana bread with walnuts and cinnamon, and a hint of fresh citrus next to dried florals and woody dark spices. The palate leans into the Almond Joy vibe with rich dark chocolate next to peach skins and lime leaves with a subtle hint of nutmeg and cherry/vanilla tobacco. The end fades through those acidic fruits towards a soft vanilla-laden finish.

Bottom Line:

This was nice but very fruity. It kind of feels like some of the bourbon-y notes were drowned out. That said, this was a bright and fruity spot amongst some very dark beers. It just wasn’t my cup of tea.

5. Goose Island Bourbon County Sir Issac’s Stout

ABV: 13.9%

Average Price: $12-$20 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This beer was devised as a nod to Fig Newtons. The brew was aged with 10,000 pounds of Black Mission figs, Graham Crackers, and natural flavors to achieve that flavor profile.

Tasting Notes:

This pops with Fig Newton energy on the nose with a clear sense of the cookie’s jammy interior and honey-laced cookie exterior next to a hint of orange oils and light molasses. The palate leans into spiced fig pudding with a hint of creamy brandy butter, soft nutmeg, and a hint of sour cherry next to malted vanilla, pipe tobacco, and rum raisin. The end really circles back around to the Fig Newton vibe while adding in more honey and spice with a vanilla lusciousness.

Bottom Line:

This is pretty damn good and really delivers on what’s promised on the label. It’s balanced and not overdone with a serious imperial stout depth and a hint of bourbon still in the mix. That said, if you’re not into Fig Newtons, this might not be your jam.

4. Goose Island Bourbon County Biscotti Stout

ABV: 14.3%

Average Price: $12-$20 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This stout came about trying to recreate almond biscotti dipped in dark chocolate sauce. To achieve this, the brewers at Goose Island added cocoa nibs, toasted almonds, anise seed, and natural flavors to the bourbon barrels while the stout aged.

Tasting Notes:

That anise really kicks on the nose with a slight salted black licorice essence next to moist marzipan covered in dark chocolate and a good dose of salted toffee sauce cut with bourbon. The palate leans into the almond vibes while adding a cinnamon toast feel next to spiced Christmas cake, dried red berries, candied citrus, and plenty of fatty nuts. The end has a very waffle feel to it with cinnamon syrup and roasted almonds mixing with a lush vanilla base.

Bottom Line:

I really like this (I’m a sucker for a lot of almond flavor notes). That said, this was a tad one-note on that almond front. I don’t say that as a slight to this beer because I really like it, but it’s definitely not a universal crowd-pleaser (for bourbon stout drinkers) like the next few on this list.

3. Goose Island Bourbon County Stout

ABV: 14.3%

Average Price: $12-$15 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This is the classic and original imperial stout from the Goose Island Bourbon County line. The brew is aged in freshly emptied bourbon barrels from Heaven Hill, Four Roses, Wild Turkey, and Buffalo Trace. Those barrels are then blended into this dark and thick elixir before bottling.

Tasting Notes:

The nose is just classic imperial stout with big notes of salted chocolate bars, creamy vanilla malts, and tons of nutmeg next to a hint of sour cherry and canned brown bread. The palate leans into that deep and malty vanilla with a swirl of dark chocolate sauce next to some blackstrap molasses, Almond Joy, and rum-raisin with a dash of sweet cinnamon, allspice, and mild anise. The end lingers with a lush finish full of almond shells, stewed pear, and woody cinnamon next to that smooth vanilla maltiness.

Bottom Line:

This is the quintessential imperial stout. It’s deep, viscous, and full of big flavor notes that really lean into classic bourbon notes.

2. Goose Island Bourbon County Two-Year Barleywine Reserve

ABV: 17%

Average Price: $15-$30 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This blend of imperial stouts is made from wildly rare bourbon barrels. Goose Island was able to secure Heaven Hill’s Old Fitzgerald Bottled-in-Bond barrels for this expression. The barrels held Old Fitz’s 14-year, 16-year, and 17-year-old bourbon expressions. Goose Island’s stout was filled into those freshly emptied barrels and left to rest for two long years before blending and bottling for this year’s run.

Tasting Notes:

There’s a deep sense of burnt caramel malts (they almost spell out “Malliard” to the senses as you inhale this one) with dark chocolate powder mixed with buttery toffee cut with dark sour mash bourbon notes, sour cherries tossed in kosher salt, and a hint of figgy jam pies dusted with powdered sugar. There’s a sense of rich and moist marzipan on the palate with a hint of orange oils and a wink of dried roses next to creamy dark chocolate and a whisper more of sour cherry. The end layers the vanilla into the dark caramelized malts and dips it all in that dark chocolate with woody anise, clove, and cinnamon adding a moment of warmth.

Bottom Line:

This is just phenomenal. It’s kind of funky and sour while delivering seriously thick bourbon vibes.

1. Goose Island Bourbon County 30th Anniversary Reserve Stout

ABV: 14.4%

Average Price: $15-$30 (16.9 oz. bottle)

The Beer:

This expression celebrates the original collaboration between Goose Island’s Gregory Hall and Beam’s Booker Noe (both legends in their fields) all that way back 30 years ago when they first started Bourbon County Stout together in 1992. This beer is aged in Beam barrels from the Small Batch Bourbon Collection. The end result is a blend of beers aged in 36% Booker’s, 33% Knob Creek, 17% Basil Hayden, and 14% Baker’s barrels.

Tasting Notes:

That Beam-iness comes through straight away on the nose with an old-fashioned sourdough doughnut vibe next to a sour cherry compote, vanilla malt, and hefty dark chocolate with a hint of milkiness and espresso bean roast qualities. The palate pops with cinnamon candy and eggnog creaminess and nutmeg next to dark chocolate brownies bespeckled with dried sour cherries and just kissed with finishing salt. The end has a fancy Mounds bar vibe next to shredded toasted coconut and rich marzipan cut with burnt orange and dark cherry bark tobacco.

Bottom Line:

Exceptional. There’s nothing more to say.

There are few whiskey releases every year more anticipated than the Buffalo Trace Antique Collection — or “BTAC” if you’re all cool about it. Last year’s collection stirred some serious controversy and about a million hours of material for whiskey podcasts, thanks to the lack of one of the greats being absent, George T. Stagg Bourbon. Well, Stagg is back in the mix this year and it has a higher ABV than ever.

Yes, friends, it’s time to review the 2022 Buffalo Trace Antique Collection.

A word of very serious warning first. Each of these bottles is marked for retail at the low-low price of $99. Cards on the table, it’ll be a miracle if you can find them for that price outside of a local state ABC (Alcoholic Beverage Control) lottery. Generally speaking, these bottles hit retail shelves at prices at a minimum of about ten times the suggested retail price and up to $5k and maybe beyond. It’s dire out there.

That’s kind of a tragedy as well, as these whiskeys truly live up to the hype. Moreover, there’s something for everyone in this year’s Collection. There’s a near-Hazmat bourbon that’ll satisfy the barrel-proof snobs. There’s also a funky and fresh rye whiskey with a big proof, a smaller but older rye with a very accessible proof, and two bourbons that are just freakin’ quintessential.

I was lucky enough to get these bottles early, so I’ll give you my professional opinion on the nose and taste. I’ll also rank these according to which ones I think you should run out and try right now. Hopefully, your favorite local whiskey bar will get a couple of these bottles so you can do just that. Otherwise, if you’re looking to buy these elite whiskeys, I wish you the best of luck on your odyssey.

Also Read: The Top 5 UPROXX Bourbon Posts Of The Last Six Months

• We Blind Tasted A Whole Bunch Of $30-60 Bourbons To See If Any Could Beat Weller
• We Put A Whole Bunch Of Bourbons To A Giant Blind Test And Discovered Some Absolute Gems
• We Blind Tasted Classic Bourbons And Were Shocked By The Winner
• The Best-Known Basic Bottles Of Bourbon, Blind Tasted And Ranked
• All The Double Gold-Winning Straight Bourbons From This Year’s San Francisco World Spirits Competition

5. Thomas H. Handy Sazerac Rye Whiskey

ABV: 65.45%

MSRP: $99

The Whiskey:

This year’s Thomas H. Handy Sazerac Rye was distilled back in the spring of 2016 with a mix of Minnesota rye, Kentucky corn, and North Dakota malted barley with some of the iconic Kentucky limestone water. The hot juice went into new white oak from Independent Stave from Missouri with a #4 char level (55 seconds). Those barrels were racked in warehouses I, L, and M on floors 2, 4, 5, and 6. After six years and four months, 31% of the whiskey was lost to the angel’s share before these barrels were batched and bottled as-is.

Tasting Notes:

That high proof comes through on the nose with a hint of orange marmalade next to buttery southern biscuits, a hint of old saddle leather, star anise-heavy mulled wine with a whisper of cranberry, lemon meringue pie (or maybe Key Lime), and a flourish of dried flowers that edges on potpourri. The palate leans into the orange with a candied orange peel note layered into a spiced winter cake layered with dark chocolate ganache, Saigon cinnamon powder, and peanut brittle. The end has a woody floral spicy vibe kind of like a bunch of dried pine, roses, dried orange wheels, and cinnamon sticks wrapped up with old twine and dipped in a chocolate sauce with more dried rose lingering behind it.

Bottom Line:

This is a hell of a whiskey that simply doesn’t rock my world. I can’t get behind the floral notes in this one. That said, I can see why people line up for this as that flavor profile is so distinct and unique. To each their own.

4. George T. Stagg Bourbon

ABV: 69.35%

MSRP: $99

The Whiskey:

This year’s return of the Stagg is hewn from whiskey distilled all the way back in 2007 with Kentucky corn, Minnesota rye, and North Dakota barley. The juice was filled into new white oak from Independent Stave from Missouri with a #4 char level (55 seconds). Those barrels were then stored in the famed Warehouse K on the first and fifth floors over 15 years, wherein 75% of the liquid was lost to the angels. Finally, the barrels were batched and bottled as-is.

Tasting Notes:

This whiskey is hot. Your nose is met with buttery pecan waffles loaded with dark salted chocolate chips and dripping with maple syrup that feels expensive next to darkly roasted espresso beans, singed vanilla husks, and dried sour cherries next to a medley of holiday spices. The palate leans into those spices with a clear sense of sharp cinnamon, old clove buds, allspice berries, and whole nutmeg bulbs next to a hint of star anise and maybe some cardamom before that darkly roasted coffee jumps back in with a deeply stewed cherry in a dark treacle syrup before the ABVs buzz hard on the mid-palate. The end amps up the woodiness with the spices and adds in a sense of old cedar bark, dark chocolate nibs, and a cherry-tobacco buzziness.

Bottom Line:

This needed a rock. There’s a lot to plumb from the depths of this one, but you’re just not going to do that neat. On this list, I’m looking for perfection as-is and this needs a little massaging to find that perfect moment.

All of that said, this is a massive, smack-you-in-the-face, water-bucket-to-the-head-while-sleeping, take-no-prisoners whiskey. You just have to get past those ABVs to find the hidden gem hiding behind that proof.

3. William Larue Weller Bourbon

ABV: 62.35%

MSRP: $99

The Whiskey:

Distilled back in the spring of 2010, this whiskey was made with a mix of Kentucky corn and wheat and barley from North Dakota with that Kentucky limestone water. The distillate was filled into new white oak from Independent Stave from Missouri with a #4 char level (55 seconds) and stored in warehouses C, K, and N on floors 2, 3, and 4 for 12 long years. During that time, 64% of the whiskey was lost to hungry angels. Those barrels were then batched and this whiskey was bottled as-is.

Tasting Notes:

The nose on this one is surprisingly sweet with a big slice of coconut cream pie (with a lard crust) next to your grandma’s butterscotch candies straight from an old leather handbag that’s held menthol cigarettes for decades and maybe some old Mon Cheri bonbons. The palate opens with a lush eggnog full of nutmeg, allspice, and vanilla that leads to a white pound cake with a hint of poppy seed next to old leather tobacco pouches with a hot cinnamon spiciness on the mid-palate with a light cedar woodiness. The end layers that white cake into the tobacco while packing it all into an old leather handbag with whispers of mint chocolate chip, Halloween-sized Mounds bars, and old lawn furniture that’s been left out too many seasons.

Bottom Line:

Look, these top three are basically tied for first place. Going microscopic to try and rank these, I backed away a tad from the mid-palate heat on this one. It wasn’t overpowering but it didn’t provide as effortless an experience as the next two. But again, that’s me reaching hard for something to pick at.

2. Sazerac Rye 18-Year-Old Whiskey

ABV: 45%

MSRP: $99

The Whiskey:

This whiskey started its journey back in 2003 and 2004 when the original juice was distilled with Minnesota rye, Kentucky corn, and North Dakota barley. The hot juice was loaded into new white oak from Independent Stave from Missouri with a #4 char level (55 seconds) and left to rest in warehouses K, M, and P on the second, third, and fourth floors. Overly nearly two decades, an average of 74% of the juice was lost to the angels before proofing and bottling.

Tasting Notes:

This one opens with a pile of candied and burnt orange peels next to a rich lemon bread with plenty of rich vanilla and poppy next to sweet layers of molasses, old leather tobacco pouches, and an old set of lawn furniture that’s spent too much time under and an old oak tree. The palate swells with a deep molasses sweetness next to a dash of freshly cracked black pepper countered by musty cumin, dried red chili pepper flakes, and a whisper of fresh bay leaf that leads to singed wild sage, rye bread crusts covered in coriander seeds, and a touch of maple syrup cut butter with a hint of cinnamon. The end slowly descends into a creamy mint chocolate chip tobacco vibe next to flaked cherry bark ready for a smoker and old oak leaves resting in dead sweetgrass.

Bottom Line:

This is just phenomenal. It’s so clearly a classic rye that goes above and beyond on the flavor profile to take you on a true sensory journey. This is also the most accessible sip that feels pretty much perfect poured neat. It beckons you back for more to dig deeper into the flavor profile’s depths.

I can’t wait to make a Manhattan with this.

1. Eagle Rare 17-Year-Old Bourbon

ABV: 50.5%

MSRP: $99

The Whiskey:

Back in the spring of 2005, a humble bourbon was made with Kentucky distiller’s corn, Minnesota rye, and North Dakota barley. That hot juice was then filled into new white oak from Independent Stave from Missouri with a #4 char level (55 seconds) and stacked in Buffalo Trace’s warehouses H, K, and L on floors one and four. It was left alone for 17 years, which allowed 70% of the juice to be lost to the angels. In 2022, the barrels were batched and the whiskey was proofed down to 101 proof, and this whiskey was bottled otherwise as-is.

Tasting Notes:

The nose subtly draws you in with soft pipe tobacco that feels fresh and vibrant next to dried sour cherries dipped in salted dark chocolate and rolled in vanilla seeds and vanilla-laced streusel with a good dose of woody maple syrup with this fleeting hint of red brick, moldy cellar beams, and soft and sandy cellar dirt floor. Old maple trees dripping with sap lead to a rich salted caramel candy vibe next to rich vanilla pound cake topped with a creamy dark chocolate frosting and bespeckled with orange zest, dried cranberries bits, and crushed espresso beans. The mid-palate takes on a woody spiciness with a whisper of apple bark that informs a spiced Christmas cake full of soft cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, mace, and maybe some anise and dried dark fruits with creamy eggnog baseline next to old Whether’s Originals wrapped up in dry tobacco leaves and stacked in a musty pine box for safekeeping.

Bottom Line:

This is a perfect bourbon.

Each week our staff of film and TV experts surveys the entertainment landscape to select the ten best new/newish shows available for you to stream at home. We put a lot of thought into our selections, and our debates on what to include and what not to include can sometimes get a little heated and feelings may get hurt, but so be it, this is an important service for you, our readers. With that said, here are our selections for this week.

Get more streaming recommendations with our weekly What To Watch newsletter.

10. (tie) Reboot (Hulu)

A comedy all-star team of Judy Greer, Keegan Michael Key, Johnny Knoxville, Rachel Bloom, and Paul Reiser come together to gently mock the reboot gold rush and the entertainment industry, providing a Larry Sanders-y kind of inside baseball show that benefits from the presence of Modern Family co-creator Steven Levitan and Party Down mastermind John Enbom. Did we mention Judy Greer? The legend that is Judy Greer grows as she totally steals these early episodes as an actress turned duchess turned actress trying to stave off Hollywood irrelevancy, which is something that could never happen to the real Judy Greer because she is an American treasure. But acting! Watch it on Hulu.

10. (tie) Shantaram (Apple TV+)

Charlie Hunnam and Shubham Saraf told us how chaos fueled this odyssey, and they aren’t messing around. Hunnam, as well, is a world away from Sons of Anarchy‘s Charming, California setting here. He’s semi-similarly an outlaw, though, in this adaptation of Gregory David Roberts’ same-named book, which details the life of an Australian convict who flees from prison for a new life in India. This may or may not be a semi-autobiographical turn from Roberts himself, whose life experiences are incredibly similar. Hunnam’s character finds himself both enthralled and struggling to avoid the trouble that got him into prison in the first place. Then he meets an enigmatic woman, and life grows even more complicated. It happens! Watch it on Apple TV Plus.

9. Documentary Now! (IFC)

When should you check out the new season of Documentary Now!? NOW. Or whenever. Sorry for rushing you, but we wouldn’t want you to forget to watch Alexander Skarsgård as “Werner Herzog,” or the loving parodies of My Octopus Teacher and When We Were Kings (which have been remade as “My Monkey Grifter” and “How They Threw Rocks”), or Cate Blanchett once again proving she’s equally fantastic in searing dramas and ridiculous comedies. Actually, let’s take that back: watch Documentary Now NOW. Watch it on IFC.

8. Andor (Disney Plus)

George Lucas has frequently insisted that, like Wu-Tang Clan, Star Wars is for the children. But Andor sure looks like it’s geared more towards adults. The Rogue One prequel starring Diego Luna, reprising his role as Cassian Andor, is gritty, mature, and other words you use to describe movies and TV shows that aren’t messing around. And with this being the first Disney-era Star Wars show to be filmed in real-life locations, Andor isn’t messing around. Watch it on Disney Plus.

7. Big Mouth (Netflix)

Big Mouth is back. This is good news for fans of filthy animated shows about teenagers figuring out their hormone-ravaged bodies. And fans of shows that are just, like, good. You probably know what you’re getting here at this point. Get in there if you’ve enjoyed being in there through the first few seasons. This isn’t hard.
Watch it on Netflix.

6. The Watcher (Netflix)

Fresh off his Dahmer success, Ryan Murphy is here to freak people out again with this true-crime miniseries about the Broaddus family, who thought they found the greatest home ever, but it’s haunted. Not literally, but it’s being stalked by somehow who actually calls himself “The Watcher” and claims a deep attachment to the home, and god, this sounds horrific. Naomi Watts and Bobby Cannavale portray the terrorized leads, but rest assured, some light moments will exist because Jennifer Coolidge portrays the house’s realtor. Sold! Watch it on Netflix.

5. Atlanta (FX/Hulu)

Atlanta is back — and back in Atlanta — for one last ride after a season-long jaunt to Europe. It’s kind of remarkable that this show has even existed. In a good way. It’s strange and silly, thoughtful and artistic, and not really like anything else out there. Donald Glover was a star before any of this got underway, but it’s made the rest of the main cast stars, too. That’s kind of cool. Get in there and appreciate this show while we still have it. You could be waiting a long time for anything even remotely similar. Watch it on FX/Hulu.

4. Guillermo del Toro’s Cabinet of Curiosities (Netflix)

The horror maestro unleashes an anthology series full of sinister tales, helmed by seasoned directors including Jennifer Kent (The Babadook). Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke adapts a story from H.P. Lovecraft, and other directors include Ana Lily Amirpour, Panos Cosmatos, Guillermo Navarro, David Prior, Vincenzo Natali, and Keith Thomas. It’s a fitting way to wrap up the witching season, so make it last forever. Watch it on Netflix.

3. Interview With the Vampire (AMC Plus)

You’ve surely seen the 1990s movie starring Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, and Kirsten Dunst, and now, Anne Rice’s most popular gothic novel gets the small-screen adaptation. Great news: this version is better than the film for several reasons. Jacob Anderson of Game of Thrones gives us a very different Louis while Sam Reid swaggers about as Lestat de Lioncourt, and Claudia’s story gets expanded with Bailey Bass giving us a brazen and tragic performance and a secondary narrative framing device. The leading duo takes their sexual tension out of the closet, too, which adds a lot of layers (and fun) to this update. Watch it on AMC Plus.

2. Abbott Elementary (Hulu)

The first season of Abbott Elementary was a feel-good network sitcom that caught a massive wave of popularity and won a bunch of Emmys in a time when feel-good network sitcoms are kind of not supposed to do that. Credit for this goes to creator and star Quinta Brunson, who realized that an underfunded inner-city public school was exactly the right place to show us people with good hearts working inside a system that can be cold. Kind of like Parks and Recreation but in Philadelphia. The second season is underway and does not appear to be missing a beat. This is basically a miracle, all around. Watch it on Hulu.

1. The White Lotus (HBO Max)

The first season of The White Lotus took the world and the internet by storm with its combination of misery and drama and beautiful Hawaiian scenery. Season two takes the action to a new resort in the White Lotus chain, this one in Italy, and replaces almost the entire cast. “Almost” being the key word here because Jennifer Coolidge is back as Tanya. Which is good. More shows should be about Jennifer Coolidge going to fancy hotels around the world. This is a nice start. Watch it on HBO Max.

Each week our staff of film and TV experts surveys the entertainment landscape to select the ten best new/newish movies available for you to stream at home. We put a lot of thought into our selections, and our debates on what to include and what not to include can sometimes get a little heated and feelings may get hurt, but so be it, this is an important service for you, our readers. With that said, here are our selections for this week.

10. (tie) I Love You, You Hate Me (Peacock)

To many, Barney The Dinosaur was a foundational and positive part of their childhood, filling their days with song and love, but the icon also found himself caught in the middle of a still-raging war between snark and sentimentality, sparking hate from hate groups of the early internet era that, in I Love You, You Hate Me, get credit for helping to unlock the culture of grievance and rage that feels more prevalent and caustic now. Throw in side stories about a tantric sex guru, a shooting, and some Blues Clues Steve wisdom on the uncomplicated positivity of Barney and you get a pretty rich and compelling 2-part docuseries. Watch it on Peacock.

10. (tie) Elvis (HBO Max)

Baz Lurhman’s Elvis biopic is trash. Beautiful, glorious trash. The kind you leave out on your front porch for your neighbors to marvel at in grotesque disbelief. It’s hip-gyrating, finger-thrusting, sweat-pouring theatrics packaged in lush cinematography, contained in a classic underdog story that reaffirms everything you thought you knew about the King of Rock and Roll, and then adds some weird personal fodder that makes you question everything you thought you knew about the King of Rock and Roll. Austin Butler is mesmerizing, and so is whatever the hell Tom Hanks is doing in this thing. Enjoy it for what it is – a beautifully-shot fever dream filled with some great tunes. Watch it on HBO Max.

10. (tie) Thor: Love and Thunder (Disney Plus)

Thor is back once again and he brought some new friends with him. Natalie Portman, to be specific. Which is fun. This follow-up to the also-fun Ragnarok has made the move from theaters to streaming and into your living rooms. That’s another fun thing. It is almost unreasonable how good Chris Hemsworth is in these movies. You should not be allowed to look like that and be that funny. Someone should make a rule about it. Until then… watch it on Disney Plus.

9. Hocus Pocus 2 (Disney Plus)

Oh look! Another glorious sequel. Fans have been clamoring for a followup to this spooky childhood classic for so long that, now that it’s finally here, there’s some understandable apprehension. Can it capture the magic (pun intended) of its predecessor? Will the surprise musical numbers go as hard? Will Disney allow more tongue-in-cheek one liners about Satanic worship and child cannibalism to flourish (because we really need to hear Sarah Jessica Parker confirm she smells children, just one more time)? We don’t have all the answers but it’s never a bad thing when Bette Midler, Parker, and Kathy Najimy get together on screen. And we wouldn’t be caught dead talking smack about the Sanderson sisters. Watch it on Disney Plus.

8. Do Revenge (Netflix)

A revenge fantasy set in an impossibly luxurious school where impossibly rich kids trade impossibly sharp and smart barbs, Do Revenge is not to be believed as a real slice of teenage life, but it is to be enjoyed. A lot. Led by Maya Hawke and Camila Mendes, Do Revenge is the perfect mean-teen movie, giving us all the fun and fierce cross of Mean Girls, Clueless, Heathers, 10 Things I Hate About You, Cruel Intentions, and Throw Momma From The Train (!?) that we didn’t know we needed, but we so, so did. Watch it on Netflix.

7. The Redeem Team (Netflix)

So here’s what happened. The Dream Team took the world by storm at the 1992 Olympics, with Magic and Michael and Larry and a slew of other Hall of Famers coming together to win gold in almost hilariously dominant fashion. Then, over the next 15 years, playing for USA Basketball became less appealing and things all got weird. Until, that is, 2008, when everyone from LeBron James to Dwyane Wade to Kobe Bryant had enough and got the band together for what became known as The Redeem Team. Now, 14 years after that, there’s a documentary about it. Feels like a must-watch for hoops fans. At least a should-watch. So… watch it on Netflix.

6. Hellraiser (Hulu)

You are probably at least a little familiar with Hellraiser, the 1987 horror classic directed by Clive Barker. It’s been depicted on the screen in one way or another 11 times now, so that feels like a pretty safe assumption. The 11th and most recent version comes to Hulu and stars Odessa A’zion and Jamie Clayton. The official description goes something like this: “A young woman struggling with addiction comes into possession of an ancient puzzle box, unaware that its purpose is to summon the Cenobites, a group of sadistic supernatural beings from another dimension.” It is always a bummer when that happens. Watch it on Hulu.

5. Rosaline (Hulu)

Hulu is continuing its tradition of taking dusty old romance classics and reimagining them for our more modern, thumb-swiping times (see Fire Island) by tackling, who else, Shakespeare. If you’ve ever heard the tale of two teenagers from warring families who off-ed themselves instead of, I don’t know, giving group therapy a try and thought to yourself, “Huh, this is really messed up,” then this rom-com is for you. Booksmart’s Kaitlyn Dever plays Rosaline, the girl Romeo drops like a hot potato soon after meeting his Juliet. Jilted and craving revenge, she enacts a plan to keep the lovers apart and … well, you know how things go. Sharply smart and wickedly funny, it’s the kind of Shakespeare re-telling no one knew to ask for but you’ll be happy it exists anyway. Watch it on Hulu.

4. The School for Good and Evil (Netflix)

Lot going on here. Let’s start at the beginning. Paul Feig directs a cinematic take on a book of the same name about two kids who get swept away to an enchanted school where students learn to be heroes and villains in an attempt to keep the universe in balance. This is why “the school for good and evil” is right there in the title. We’ve got magic and teen angst and a heck of a cast that includes everyone from Charlize Theron to Kerry Washington to Laurence Fishburne to Michelle Yeoh. Again, a lot going on here. Most of it promising or at least interesting. Worth a shot, probably. Watch it on Netflix.

3. Wendell and Wild (Netflix)

If you’re missing Key & Peele, we have some good news for you. Multiple seasons of the Comedy Central series will arrive on Netflix in November, so you can get your Hingle McCringleberry on, right from the comfort of your living room. In the meantime, you can enjoy Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele’s voices (along with that of Angela Bassett) as they play plotting demons who tangle with a teen who digs punk rock. Watch it on Netflix.

2. The Good Nurse (Netflix)

Jessica Chastain and Eddie Redmayne star in a mostly fictionalized account of Charlie Cullen, a New Jersey nurse who was found responsible for dozens of murders of patients over a 16-year period. The star power is here and everyone seems to love semi-true stories about serial killers lately so there’s at least even money odds that this sucker takes off. Just don’t watch it before you have a doctor appointment. That would not be fun. Watch it on Netflix.

1. Halloween Ends (Peacock)

The Halloween franchise is back for one last ride. Probably. The word “ends” is right there in the title so it’s a decent assumption, at least. For now. Jamie Lee Curtis is running around with a gun and there will be spooky music and ominous shots of Michael Myers and tons of callbacks to all the previous installments in the series. The bigger issue here is that Michael Myers has been terrorizing these poor people for almost 50 years now. Leave it alone, buddy. Move on. Watch it on Peacock.

Much has been made about The Watcher and for solid reason. The limited series has cemented Ryan Murphy’s place as a Netflix force, given that he held tight with two shows atop the Netflix charts at the same time. In addition, plenty of people who would have preferred a definitive ending expressed disappointment at the lack of a concrete conclusion. I still maintain that the show is worth watching despite complaints, but who does The Watcher end up being on the TV show?

As you’re likely aware by now, The Watcher is inspired by the real-life ordeal of the Broaddus family. They purchased what they believed to be their dream home in New Jersey and soon began to receive threatening letters from a mysterious person who raved about “young blood” while stalking the home and family. No one ever figured out who this real-life Watcher is, and the Broadduses moved out without further incident to the next owner. The same thing happens on the show but with a twist.

No character ends up pinpointed as The Watcher. However, multiple characters take credit, either in a joking way or otherwise:

– Theodora Birch: The private detective hired by Dean Brannock delivers a deathbed confession that she is The Watcher and had been jealous that the Bannocks owned the home. Yet as Theodora’s daughter later reveals, that this was a falsehood, and her mom only meant to make it appear as though her final case wouldn’t go unsolved.

– Roger Kaplan: After Dean and Nora confronted this high school teacher about a letter-writing exercise he had once conducted, they accused him of being their stalker. Subsequently, Roger’s wife was so freaked out that she separated from him. In retaliation, he mockingly stood near the problematic house and declared, “I’m The Watcher!” But no, it ain’t him, either.

– Nora Brannock: When Jennifer Coolidge’s real estate agent ended up buying the problematic house, Nora surfaced inside to deliver a piece of her mind. She menacingly signed off with an “I’ll be watching.” And then someone with a male-looking stature appeared inside the home and sent the realtor running for the hills but not before killing her dog. Not cool! However, this was clearly not Nora.

In summary, no one is The Watcher, but that might make everyone The Watcher.

The Watcher is streaming on Netflix.