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Disclaimer: While all of the products recommended here were chosen independently by our editorial staff, Uproxx may receive payment to direct readers to certain retail vendors who are offering these products for purchase.

Welcome to SNX DLX, your weekly roundup of the best sneakers to hit the market. We’ve finally arrived! Today marks the first legitimately exciting week we’ve had in this so far sorry year for sneakers. This week we get New Jordans, holiday specials, and even a new Bad Bunny sneaker!

The good news doesn’t stop there, we’ve peeked ahead at some of the planned releases for the rest of the month and it’s looking like it’s all smooth sailing from here — so long as release dates don’t get shuffled around. But that’s the future, we live in the present and this week there are a lot of dope sneakers to be had, from the latest Nike Union collaboration to one of the coolest Air Jordan 6 colorways we’ve ever seen. Straight up.

So without further ado, let’s dive into this week’s best picks.

Nike WMNS Air Huarache Purple Punch

The Huarache has enjoyed a recent resurgence this decade, and now the sneaker is getting a clean women’s exclusive Purple Punch makeup. Featuring a shimmering neoprene accented leather upper that combines deep purples and cloud white, this Air Huarache is oozing with ‘90s sensibilities. It’s a bit of the past in the present.

The Women’s exclusive Air Huarache Purple Punch is out now for a retail price of $120. Pick up a pair via the Nike SNKRS app.

Bad Bunny x Adidas Forum PWR

With Kanye West, Beyonce, and Bad Bunny, Adidas has a pretty strong roster of celebrity sneakers. After a strong debut last year, it’s looking like Bad Bunny is getting yet another sneaker, this time shaking things up a bit by ditching the Adidas Forum for … the Adidas Forum Power.

Okay, it’s not the most exciting thing the pair could’ve done, but Bad Bunny’s latest Adidas sneaker, like the previous three, is pretty dope, which makes us feel confident about the longevity of this partnership.

Starting with an ‘80s inspired design, the Forum PWR features a letter upper with a sand and acid orange colorway, ruffled three stripes, reflective details at the tongue, and some blue contrast panels at the heel. Instead of the Forum branding, this sneaker simply reads ‘Benito,’ which, if you don’t know, is Bad Bunny’s actual name.

The Adidas x Bad Bunny Forum PWR is out now for a retail price of $160. Pick up a pair via the Adidas Confirmed App.

Air Max 95 Ironstone

It’s been a minute since we’ve seen a notable Air Max 95, but this week brings a new colorway to the classic silhouette and we’re all about it. The Ironstone features a mixed suede, canvas, and jacquard upper, reinforced to handle those harsh winter elements. We love the intricate jacquard webbing on the upper’s shroud, the colorway is laid out across the wavy upper like a gradient with deep browns at the bottom ascending to gradually to white.

The Air Max 95 Ironstone is out now for a retail price of $185. Pick up a pair via the Nike SNKRS app.

Nike x Union LA Passport Pack Pistachio Dunk

This is hands down our favorite release of the week, but that is usually the case when LA streetwear institution Union does a Nike drop. The label has a perfect track record of amazing Nike collaborations and this week’s Passport Pack was no different. The sneaker, in its pistachio colorway, was previously only available during an in-store raffle and it will now be released online on February 10th and is already floating around on aftermarket sites.

The Pistachio features a ripstop upper with exposed stitching and a muted pistachio nut-esque color. The concept behind the Passport Pack was to give a modern take on classic ’00’s Dunk colorways exclusive to the cities of New York City, Tokyo, and Los Angeles.

The Nike x Union LA Passport Park Pistachio Dunk is set to drop on February 10th for a retail price of $150. Pick up a pair at the Union LA webstore (watch the site for the countdown timer) or hit up aftermarket sites like Flight Club.

Nike Air Trainer 1 Coriander

As the weather continues to warm up, a lot of us are about to get eager to start spending more time outdoors, which means hitting nearby trails and hiking spots. So you’re going to need some new footwear if you want to trek comfortably and in style. This week Nike will launch a new outdoor-inspired colorway of the Air Trainer 1, dubbed the Coriander. The design features a forefoot strap for a strapped in fit with Air cushioning and a mid-height collar that should supply you with more ankle support as you hit that rugged terrain.

The Air Trainer 1 Coriander is set to drop on February 11th for a retail price of $140. Pick up a pair via the Nike SNKRS app.

Nike WMNS Air Jordan 5 Low Girls That Hoop

If you can count on one thing from the sneaker industry, it’s that Valentine’s Day is going to bring out the pink shoes. We say bring them on. If you can rock pink shoes, you’ll always turn heads with your fit. In celebration of the large and underrepresented community of women’s b-ball players, Nike is launching this soft leather low-cut Jordan 5 in bubblegum pink.

Arctic Orange and Siren Red accents round out the design and a black contrasting shark tooth and matching Jumpman logo at the heel really add some stark interest to this otherwise pretty pair of sneakers. All I want to know is why Nike didn’t launch this in a full-size run? Us big feet folks want to rock them too.

The WMNS Air Jordan 5 Low Girls That Hoop is set to drop on February 11th for a retail price of $170. Pick up a pair via the Nike SNKRS app.

Nike Air Jordan 5 Racer Blue

It’s not pink, but we’re not going to deny that this Jordan 5 in Racer Blue isn’t dope. Featuring a moody deep black nubuck upper with contrasting Racer Blue accents represented on the Jumpman logo, mudguard, and inner tongue, the Racer Blue sits on a cool icy blue outsole with a reflective quarter panel cage and matching black laces.

It will go down as one of the dopest Jordan 5 colorants of all time. We can guarantee you that!

The Air Jordan 5 Racer Blue is set to drop on February 12th for a retail price of $200. Pick up a pair via the Nike SNKRS app or aftermarket sites like GOAT and Flight Club.

It’s been an eventful day for TV shows that took long breaks between seasons coming back to give us something to finally look forward to. AMC announced that the sixth and final season of Better Call Saul will premiere in April, followed by the second half of the season in July, while IFC’s wonderful Documentary Now! is returning… eventually. There’s no exact date — “the series is returning with six new episodes and is currently is production” is all the press release says — but it will be sometime in 2022.

A trio of season four episodes from the Fred Armisen, Bill Hader, Seth Meyers, and Rhys Thomas-created series, including the documentaries they spoof, have been revealed:

-Paying homage to fashion documentaries 3 Salons at the Seaside and The September Issue, Two Hairdressers in Bagglyport is a fly-on-the-wall portrait of a hair salon owner and her staff in the small coastal village of Bagglyport as they prepare their yearly stylebook.

-In the vein of When We Were Kings and other great explorations of sport, How They Threw Rocks chronicles the Welsh sport of Craig Maes, also known as “Field Rock,” and the iconic 1974 bout dubbed “The Melon vs. The Felon.”

-Drawing inspiration from My Octopus Teacher, My Monkey Grifter follows a filmmaker who forms a deep, emotional, and financially taxing relationship with a monkey who may have ulterior motives.

I need the monkey grifter documentary… now.

No casting has been revealed, but Helen Mirren is returning as host and previous seasons have featured Jack Black, Cate Blanchett, Maya Rudolph, Michael C. Hall, and in one of the funniest TV episodes of the past 10 years, John Mulaney, Richard Kind, Paula Pell, Taran Killam, James Urbaniak, Alex Brightman, and Renée Elise Goldsberry. I hum “Christmas Tips” to myself at least once a week.

The NBA trade deadline did not disappoint in terms of drama, as the headliner got done early with the Sixers and Nets getting the much-discussed Ben Simmons for James Harden trade done with about 90 minutes to go before the deadline.

That deal seemed to open the floodgates, as the rest of the league could move forward with the two biggest dominos knocked down, and the race for the Atlantic Division heated up even more in the minutes following. The Boston Celtics, which had spent the days leading up to the deadline and the morning of getting off of contracts to get under the luxury tax, found themselves a suitor in San Antonio to get the point guard upgrade they’ve been desperately seeking, trading Josh Richardson to the Spurs for Derrick White, per The Athletic’s Shams Charania, with Chris Haynes reporting a first round pick and Romeo Langford are also headed to San Antonio.

The pick going to San Antonio is this year’s Celtics pick, protected 1-4 which should not really come into play.

The Spurs have become sellers at the deadline, already swapping Thaddeus Young to Toronto for Goran Dragic (who they will waive) and a first round pick, and now pick up another first for White. The Celtics get a defensive minded guard in White who is a capable secondary creator but is very comfortable working off the ball, which is an important thing when being put next to Jayson Tatum and Jaylen Brown.

It isn’t a blockbuster like the Nets and Sixers made, but it is a nice trade for both sides, as Boston isn’t ready to give up on their dreams of contending just yet.

Social media has been a bit of a double-edged sword for Charli XCX. It was integral to the creation of her 2020 album How I’m Feeling Now, which she made in 2020 with heavy input from fans online. Now, though, being online is taking its toll on her, so much so that she’s thinking about taking a break from it.

In a post shared today, Charli wrote:

“I’ve always had a pretty open dialogue with you guys and so I just wanna mention a few things that have been on my mind recently. I have been feeling like I can’t do anything right at the moment. I know social media isn’t exactly a haven for kindness and positivity but generally speaking I always felt pretty safe with you guys on here. I’ve noticed lately that a few people seem quite angry at me – for the choices of songs I’ve chosen to release, for the way I’ve decided to roll out my campaign, for the things I need to do to fund what will be the greatest tour I’ve ever done, for things I say, things I do etc. I’ve been grappling quite a lot with my mental health the past few months and obviously it makes negativity and criticism harder to handle when I come across it and of course, I know this is a common struggle for most people in this day and age. But yeah anyways.. I just wanted to get on here and say, hey I’m really out here trying my best and working my ass off to make things that are hot and exciting and there’s honestly so much more insane stuff to come 🙂 !

In the meantime I’m thinking of just drafting tweets from a far when I feel like saying something and having someone else post them, just for a little while, because I can’t really handle it here right now. Eternal love, Charli x.”

Shortly after that post, Charli shared a teaser clip promoting a new video for her Rina Sawayama collaboration, “Beg For You.” The video is set to premiere tomorrow.

Find Charli’s posts below.

Charli XCX is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

Mike Lindell will not be stopped. Though even Donald Trump seems to have lost interest in the MyPillow founder’s obsessive determination in proving that the 2020 presidential election was rigged, Lindell keeps going and going and going (and going…)

While he was originally aided in his inanity for a while by Fox News, even they bailed on the pillow magnate/conspiracy theorist after both of them got smacked with billion-dollar defamation suits from Dominion Voting Systems for their continued, and unfounded, insistence that there was widespread voter fraud. Eventually, Fox News gave Lindell the whole “it’s not you, it’s me” blowoff then refused to let him appear on the network, which he’s had trouble accepting. Back in November, he attempted to stage a protest outside the company’s New York City headquarters, and no one (not even Lindell himself) showed up. Now, as Raw Story reports, he has publicly floated the idea of hacking into Fox News’ broadcasting system and taking over its airwaves.

It sounds like a plotline from a bad sitcom because it probably was one at some time. Lindell, speaking via his own Lindell TV, hatched a plan to get his latest big idea out to Fox News listeners:

“Maybe we should get our cyber guys… to hook up our stream to Fox’s. Can you imagine? ‘This is Sean Hannity…’ All of a sudden, breaking news right out of Georgia! The evidence is pouring in, pouring in! Arizona, pouring in, pouring in, Wisconsin! And Fox, you’d have the Murdochs going, ‘Oh no, what are we going to do?! The truth is out, we’re the liars!’”

Is there truly no one who loves and/or wants to help this man?

(Via Raw Story)

Robert Pattinson, who will make his debut as the weirdo freak Batman next month, had so much fun playing the emo-caped crusader, he doesn’t want it to end.

The Twilight alum recently spoke about his desire to be the flawed hero for as long as director Matt Reeves will let him. “I’m down to do it as many times as people want to see it really. I mean, I gotta get this one out first.” Pattinson joked in a sit-down interview with his co-stars. “I talked to Matt about the idea of doing a trilogy. And that would be wonderful, I really enjoyed the process. It’s such a fun character to play. That’d be lovely.”

Paul Dano, who plays The Riddler in the upcoming film, agrees, saying that “there is so much room for this Batman to grow,” to which Pattinson exclaimed, “Yes! Big time.”

“Bruce is such a recluse in the film,” Zoe Kravitz, who plays the elusive Catwoman, said. “To see Bruce evolve into the person he knows he has to perform, that’s a really fun journey to go on.”

Pattinson’s Batman, who is taking on an interesting persona of a late ’90s emo rockstar, has been highly anticipated since the actor admitted he was inspired by Willem Dafoe for the character’s iconic raspy voice. That, along with a string of bizarre press bits about Pattinson’s inability to make pasta, make the upcoming Batman movie truly the most eagerly awaited movies of the year.

(Via Fandango)

If you’ve ever felt an overwhelming desire to spit in the face of disgraced movie star Armie Hammer, know that Tom Hardy has already done it—and was handsomely rewarded for his efforts.

Vulture ran an excerpt from Blood, Sweat & Chrome: The Wild and True Story of Mad Max: Fury Road, a forthcoming book by Kyle Buchanan (a former editor for the site, who’s now with The New York Times), which talked about the casting process for the Oscar-winning 2015 movie, the latest in George Miller’s post-apocalyptic Mad Max series. According to casting director Ronna Kress, the search for the “new” Max Rockatansky took an entire year and “We saw, at the time, what I consider now to be many of the movie stars of our day.”

Alongside Hardy and Hammer, Michael Fassbender and Jeremy Renner were among the top contenders for the part—and eventually the team wanted to see the actors alongside each other. Which is how Hardy and Hammer ended up in a room together, and Hammer essentially called mercy. “When Hardy gnashed his teeth and spat at his scene partner, Hammer told Miller that Hardy needed to be Max more than he did,” Buchanan writes.

“After Tom auditioned, George [Miller] and I went into another room, and we had a long moment of quiet with each other,” Kress said. “Then I said to George, ‘Is this the person that you can spend nine months in the desert with, telling this story? Is this the person that’s right for you?’”

For Miller, it was like a bit of déjà vu. “I had the same feeling about Tom that I had when Mel Gibson first walked into the room,” Miller said. “There was a kind of edgy charm, the charisma of animals. You don’t know what’s going on in their inner depths, and yet they’re enormously attractive.”

Miller was sold—though not, according to Hardy, before “he checked my background with other directors to see what it was like to work with me.”

Blood, Sweat & Chrome: The Wild and True Story of Mad Max: Fury Road is set to be published on February 22, 2022.

(Via Vulture)

Coi Leray has yet to capitalize on her breakout 2021, although that could change in the near future thanks to her new song “Anxiety.” The single from her upcoming debut has helped her gain traction after her breakout 2021 singles “No More Parties” and “Twinnem” brought her quirky approach to a mainstream audience. Today, she dropped the single’s surreal music video, which could raise its profile and go a long way toward earning her some much-deserved respect.

In the video, Coi is terrorized by a mischievous personification of the feeling of anxiety, portrayed by a flexible dancer in a houndstooth-patterned, bodysuit, complete with horns and a penchant for causing destruction. In a series of related vignettes, the evil imp upends a meal, forces another young woman to drink a whole bottle of wine, and demolishes a third woman’s bedroom, echoing the disruptive effects anxiety can have and the extreme measures some folks take to self-medicate.

Coi’s addressed her mental health through music on other singles, including “Medicine,” while fending off critics for the past year who criticized everything from her body to her passing resemblance to Dej Loaf. Hopefully, she can find a little peace of mind amid the bustle of becoming a star because she may only get bigger from here — especially with her debut album coming in March, as she announced on Twitter.

Watch Coi Leray’s “Anxiety” video above.

There are many ways to do salsa, and it can be made out of damn near anything. We even used squash once, and believe it or not, it was still pretty good. Salsa is best made yourself, and you don’t even have to be all that precious about it. There are almost infinite combinations of the same basic ingredients and many will make a fine salsa. Check out this guy’s Instagram any time you want to get inspired. It’s in Spanish, but you’ll manage.

But I get it, sometimes you don’t have the time, maybe you already spent all day cooking up a Mexican feast, or maybe you’re just too stoned and all you and your buddies want is a little fuel before your next sack-tapping contest. I don’t know, I’m not here to make excuses for you. The point is, enough store-bought salsas exist that at least one must surely be worth buying… right?

***

Store-bought salsa is something of a paradox in terms. The whole point of salsa is to add a fresh-produce punch to your meat or tortilla. Yet selling such a thing in stores requires the ability to last for weeks, months, or even longer in the refrigerator section or even on the shelves. Which does seem to call the whole “fresh” part into question (home-made ones only last about 5-7 days in the fridge). The question for store-bought salsas is whether they can alter that basic equation and still taste like something approximating salsa.

For this test, we figured that the salsas from the fridge section — which require refrigeration and usually have sell-by dates of a month or two — must taste fresher than the shelf-stable non-refrigerated varieties in jars that last who knows how long. So this particular ranking focuses only on what I could find in the refrigerated sections of my local Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, Sprouts, and Save Mart.

I tasted them blind (that is, not being able to see the labels, not literally blindfolded), and ranked them according to looks, smell, and taste. Tasting salsa on chips seemed to be the fairest, even though I do distinguish between a chips-and-dip salsa (I generally make a fresh pico de gallo for that situation) and a taco condiment (I tend to go spicier here, like a simple jalapeño/avocado salsa). Plenty of brands were available in mild, medium, and hot. For the sake of simplicity, and for not blowing out my palate, I just went with medium whenever there was a heat-level option.

15. Trader Joe’s Homestyle Salsa Especial (Medium)

Price: $2.99

Look:

Sort of like marinara with onion chunks and occasional cilantro flecks.

Nose:

I didn’t even have to get my face close to this one to smell the oregano. You could smell this oregano bomb from across the room. It smells like bad pizza sauce.

Taste:

Like bad marinara, only saltier. This belongs in the garbage — the outside one. I don’t want to smell this every time I throw something away.

Bottom Line:

It’s actually kind of impressive to stand out as the worst salsa in a tasting of salsas that mostly weren’t very good. This one reeked of dry oregano from five or six feet away and managed to taste even more like bad pizza sauce than it smelled. Absolutely not.

Rating: 3/10

14. La Mexicana Mild Salsa

Price: $2.99 (Save Mart)

Look:

Chunky, like restaurant pico but with a little smaller pieces.

Nose:

Pure citric acid.

Taste:

This is basically what I imagined all pre-made salsa would taste like. There’s a lot of citrus but it’s just bland and canned tasting.

Bottom Line:

See above. This is a citric acid bomb that just tasted bland and canned. I can’t really imagine a situation in which you’d need to add those flavors.

Rating: 4/10

13. Rojo’s Homestyle Salsa (Mild)

Price: $3.99 (Save Mart)

Look:

Another chunky, light-bodied pico de gallo. Looks very tomato-heavy and onion-light. There’s an isolated cilantro speck here and there.

Nose:

Mostly lime.

Taste:

It’s sort of a dry-spice muddle with lots of citrus and salt.

Bottom Line:

My hunch is that if you’re buying these deli salsas, never get anything below medium. It takes a baseline level of spice to mask the citric acid it takes to keep these from spoiling. Anyway, this one just tasted like salt and dry spices, I can’t really recommend it for anything.

Rating: 4/10

Notes: The seal was broken on this one, I think it was one of the ones I dropped on the way inside.

12. Del Real Foods Fire Roasted Red Salsa (Hot)

Price: $4.19 (Save Mart)

Look:

Watery and brownish-red. Has a more taqueria taco sauce consistency, which is a little more watery.

Nose:

There’s a ton of jalapeño skin, almost blowing out my nostrils.

Taste:

This one is a jalapeño bomb, and not in a good way. You can tell just by looking at it that there are almost more jalapeños than tomatoes, so “red salsa” feels like a bit of a misnomer. More crucially, the spice/acid/tomato balance feels way off.

Bottom Line:

This salsa boasted “only four ingredients” on the packaging, but I’m surprised it was that many. It tasted and smelled like charred jalapeños and little else. Jalapeños are great, but this tasted somehow charred and undercooked at the same time, like they just burnt the skins while the rest of the pepper was still mostly raw.

The spice and ingredient balance just felt way off.

Ranking: 4/10

11. Trader Joe’s Roasted Tomatillo Salsa

Price: $2.99

Look:

It’s green (duh) with seeds and black flecks and pretty watery. It gets chunkier when you mix it. There are the occasional onion pieces.

Nose:

I think I smell some kind of green chile? More so than tomatillo anyway.

Taste:

Very salty! I’m still getting green chile, like roasted pasilla or Anaheim chile. It tastes more like fresh chile than canned, at least, but I get that more than the tart tomatillo.

Bottom Line:

In my head, it seemed easier to make a store-bought tomatillo salsa taste like homemade than a tomato one, seeing as how tomatillos tend towards tart already. In reality, this one just wasn’t very good. Too salty, and I thought it tasted much more of roasted green chiles than it does of tomatillo. Indeed, the ingredients list “green chile pepper puree” as the second ingredient.

This is more like a roasted pasilla salsa than what it’s advertising.

Rating: 5/10

10. Trader Joe’s Organic Salsa (Medium)

Price: $3.29

Look:

Very bright red. Maybe there’s some roasted pepper in there? It’s more of a purée than chunky.

Nose:

Muddled pepperiness? I’m not sure what I’m getting there.

Taste:

It smells and tastes a little ketchup-y, but the spices are decently balanced. It’s not really great on chips, but I could see using it as an ingredient in something. Maybe to spice up some eggs or chili?

Bottom Line:

This is muddled and ketchup-y, but not terrible. It’s not worthy of chips and dip but as an ingredient for a breakfast burrito or something you could do worse.

Rating: 5/10

9. 365 Fire Roasted Cantina Style Salsa (Mild)

Price: $2.99 (Whole Foods)

Look:

Like a blender purée salsa with occasional cilantro flecks.

Nose:

Cumin on cumin.

Taste:

This salsa is essentially a cumin delivery vehicle. I guess that’s not bad if you really like cumin.

Bottom Line:

Cumin bomb! Not exactly what I’d call a great salsa, but if your only goal is to add maximum cumin flavor on a minimum budget, this is the one.

Rating: 5/10

8. Trader Joe’s Pico De Gallo (mild)

Price: $2.99

Looks:

This actually looks like restaurant pico with small chunks of fresh tomato and onion. The onions do look a touch wilted.

Nose:

All tomato and lime.

Taste:

Kind of bland, but mostly okay. This mostly tastes like fresh tomatoes, if not exactly vibrant.

Bottom Line:

Pico de gallo is traditionally made using all raw ingredients, which would seem the hardest to turn into something refrigerator stable. In that sense, it’s pretty impressive that Trader Joe’s deli pico de gallo is only slightly worse than the homemade version from Whole Foods.

Without grading on a curve, it’s mediocre at best.

Rating: 6/10

7. Pacific Coast Selections Medium Salsa

Price: $3.49

Look:

Dark red purée with black specks.

Nose:

Not sure what I’m getting. Black pepper?

Taste:

Surprisingly bright with good sweetness and a nice acid balance, though it is a touch ketchup-y.

Bottom Line:

I would never have guessed that this salsa had avocado in it if I hadn’t looked at the package. I don’t really understand the point of using avocado, but not enough that the salsa isn’t still red. Not that I’m entirely against it, it’s just … weird. Anyway, maybe the avocado gave this salsa a slightly more velvety texture?

This mostly just tasted like a replacement-level deli salsa to me.

Rating: 6/10

6. Casa Sanchez Salsa Roja (Medium)

Price: $5.99 (Whole Foods)

Look:

A vibrant red, watery purée.

Nose:

Actually smells like tomatoes. For a while there, I was convinced tomatoes didn’t have a smell.

Taste:

This is tomato-y fresh but otherwise kind of bland.

Bottom Line:

Not as good as its organic counterpart, but reasonably salsa-like.

Rating: 6/10

5. Trader Joe’s Habanero Ghost Pepper Salsa

Price: $3.29

Look:

Bright red chunky purée, with the odd seed.

Nose:

All habanero meat.

Taste:

Nice habanero flavor, which I do like. Habanero is sort of fruity and tropical, probably a little more vibrant than your standard green or dried chiles. The difficulty there is, obviously, the heat. I don’t know how much of this I could realistically eat.

Bottom Line:

This is not great as a salsa, mostly because it has more heat than flavor, but it’s pretty decent as a hot sauce or a taco condiment. Heat isn’t everything in and of itself, but it’s better than nothing. Easily the best of the Trader Joe’s salsas I tried.

Rating: 6/10

4. Unlabelled Whole Foods Pico De Gallo

Price: $5.99 per pound

Look:

Actually like restaurant salsa! Pretty impressive, honestly. It seems they used red onions rather than white, which is a choice. Greater onion-to-tomato ratio than others, but still not super onion heavy.

Nose:

I’m getting more lime than vinegar here with mostly a fresh tomato smell.

Taste:

This is very much not restaurant quality, the balance and spices are off, but at least it’s fresh. I’m getting more salt than fresh veg, and the flavors don’t quite “pop.”

Bottom Line:

This was a fresh food item made in-house at my local Whole Foods with only a few days’ shelf life, which should’ve given it a natural advantage over the other ones designed to last for weeks or months. It was fresh enough, but the spice balance wasn’t quite there. I imagine this will vary from store to store and from season to season, and probably even from employee to employee based on who’s making it and tasting it that day.

Rating: 7/10

3. Salsa Queen Red Chili Salsa

Price: $5.99 (Sprouts)

Look:

A very seedy, thickish blender purée that’s more paste-like than the others. Darker red/brownish with some tomato or pepper skins.

Nose:

Something smoky in here. Maybe chipotle?

Taste:

This is mostly a smoky cumin-chipotle bomb, but with a nice kick. Quite spicy. My scalp is sweating.

Bottom Line:

I like the name “salsa queen” because it makes me think of “size queen.” The label is also probably the coolest on this list. This one was chipotle-heavy and quite spicy, so probably not great for chips but solid on tacos and as a condiment. It certainly adds spice.

Rating: 6/10 as a chip dipper. 7/10 as a taco condiment.

2. Casa Sanchez Organica

Price: $7.29 (Whole Foods)

Look:

Red, blended purée, on the watery side. There are cilantro and onion flecks.

Nose:

It smells fresh-ish and not too dry spice heavy.

Taste:

Sort of bland, but the spice and acid levels are nicely balanced. I would eat this on chips if it was in front of me, though I wouldn’t seek it out.

Bottom Line:

This one was more “passable” than something to get excited about, but passable is pretty hard to come by with these. This one gets the spice and acid balance right, at least. Maybe that’s the “improved taste” the package describes.

Rating: 7/10

1. Tacupeto Molka Fire Roasted Salsa (Medium)

Price: $5.99 (Sprouts)

Look:

Very smooth and watery, more like taqueria taco sauce than salsa. Darker red with black flecks — either from roasted stuff or dried peppers.

Nose:

Vaguely smoky; not much going on otherwise.

Taste:

This is heavy on the chipotle, but that isn’t a bad thing. There’s a medium heat, nice balance, and moderate smokiness. Actually this one is pretty decent. Yes, I would put this on stuff. Kind of gets better the more you eat it.

Bottom Line:

This one was simply head and shoulders above the rest — probably the only one of these I would consider good, and not just “good, for store-bought salsa.” The heat, it turns out, comes from habanero and Arbol chiles. The latter of which are dried and smoky in flavor, which probably accounts for the chipotle I thought I was tasting. Arbols make a great salsa chile, it’s just hard to get a ton of Arbol flavor in something without taking a flamethrower to your palate.

Maybe that smoke flavor is just better at disguising the citric acid and calcium chloride that’s in most of these.

Rating: 8/10

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Vince Mancini is on Twitter. You can access his archive of reviews here.

Just because you’re attempting to dismantle democracy as we know it doesn’t mean you have to be rude about it. It’s a very basic tenet that, based on a new report from The Washington Post, Rudy Giuliani seems to understand. Or at least he did.

In the weeks following the 2020 presidential election (you remember, the one that Donald Trump lost?), Giuliani—the then-president’s then-pal and personal lawyer—seems to have played the role of good cop when he attempted to seize the voting machines from states and counties that didn’t vote for his guy. As WaPo reported:

Antrim County prosecutor James Rossiter said in an interview that Giuliani and several colleagues made the request during a telephone call after the county initially misreported its election results. The inaccurate tallies meant that Joe Biden appeared to have beaten Trump by 3,000 votes in a Republican stronghold, an error that soon placed Antrim at the center of false claims by Trump that the election had been stolen.

Rossiter said he declined. “I said, ‘I can’t just say: give them here.’ We don’t have that magical power to just demand things as prosecutors. You need probable cause.’ Even if he had had sufficient grounds to take the machines as evidence, Rossiter said, he could not have released them to outsiders or a party with an interest in the matter.

It was those originally misreported numbers that some people believe made Antrim County a prime target of Team Trump’s “Aww, shucks—would you mind handing over your voting machines?” appeal. According to The Post’s examination of the incident, “the call to Rossiter was also part of a behind-the-scenes intervention by Trump’s legal team in Antrim that seized on the county’s election night blunder and helped twist the mistake into supposed proof of a vast conspiracy to rig the election.” (While playing nice seemed to be the first route to seizing these machines, Politico recently reported that Trump was also cooking up an executive order that would have allowed National Guard troops to go in and take the machines on Trump’s behalf.)

While Giuliani, via his attorney, declined to answer questions about the incident, other legal scholars described the direct appeal to a local prosecutor as both “unusual” and “inappropriate.” For his part, Rossiter was just plain surprised: “I never expected in my life I’d get a call like this,” he said.

(Via The Washington Post)