Ah, useless facts. Random knowledge that serves no purpose other than to take up space in our brains, and maybe, just maybe, win a trivia game (yeah right) or kill time at a party (I’ve forgotten, what’s a party?).
Leave it to Ask Reddit to resurface all things odd and amusing, though. People shared their own useless facts that live rent free in their heads. And though they might be pointless, they are certainly entertaining.
Yep, this useless fact has stayed with us since elementary school On the bright side, it’s been the source of many a fun meme.
Vending machines are more deadly than sharks.
Think about this next time you go to retrieve a Snickers bar: Between 2002 and 2015, the National Electronic Surveillance System reported that vending machines caused four deaths per year in the U.S. Mostly due to people tipping the machines onto themselves.
Compare that to the shark-related deaths averaging out to just 0.6 deaths per year. Not sure how only about half of a person is considered dead, but math was never my strength.
This statistic might need to be taken with a grain of sea salt however, given that those in landlocked states have next-to-zero chances of experiencing a shark attack. But there you have it, a useless fact to use when you’re at the beach.
Snails have teeth.
“They’re not big enough teeth to hurt humans. That’s what makes it a useless fact to know. & it won’t leave my head because it’s juuuuuust disturbing enough to make me rethink my entire opinion on snails.” – ghosts-go-boo
But cows do not.
At least, no upper front teeth. Makes chewing—and dentist visits—easier I suppose.
The Sun is about 400 times bigger than the Moon but also about 400 times farther away from Earth. So they look to be about the same size.
This explains how the sun can be completely blocked in an eclipse.
Pigeons and doves are in the same bird family.
Columbidae is a subspecies of birds that are stout bodied, with short necks, and primarily feed on seeds, fruits and plants. Though one lives on as a symbol of peace and love, and the other is often considered a flying rat, the names are practically interchangeable.
However, thinking about Stevie Nicks singing, “just like a white-winged pigeon” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.
The length of a jiffy…
According to ScienceFocus.com, physicists use a “jiffy” to define how long light takes to travel one femtometer (which is a tiny fraction of a millimeter). In layman’s terms, one jiffy equals one-fiftieth of a second.
So next time you say, “be back in a jiffy,” know that you better return really, really, really fast.
Most corn is inedible for humans.
“1% of the corn grown in the USA is sweet corn (the corn you eat as corn). The other 99% is field corn (or dent corn), which is fairly inedible raw and needs to be processed before human consumption. This field corn is also what they use for non-edible corn products, like ethanol, paint, cosmetics, etc. Yes, most corn goes to livestock feed. Ethanol and High Fructose Corn Syrup are up there as well. Yes, if you’re driving on a highway and are passing fields of corn, you very likely cannot eat it.” – Kat_lbltko1pl
Infants have flexible bones.
Ever wonder why toddlers seem so much more flexible? This is because a baby’s skeleton if very different from an adult’s. Babies are born with about 300 bones (94 more than adults) that are joined together with pliable cartilage to make that whole birth thing possible. As they get older, the bones will fuse together. And suddenly that toe touch is nothing but a distant dream of the past.
Numbers from 1-999 don’t have the letter “a” in word form.
Some vowels just don’t get the respect they deserve.
John Wilkes Booth and Lee Harvey Oswald are both known by three names. And each full name is composed of 15 letters.
Actually, this is not entirely correct. Oswald’s full name was not used until after Kennedy’s assassination, due to his habit of adopting false names.
Cockroaches molt.
Unlike a reptile shedding it’s skin, cockroaches molt out of their entire exoskeleton. Out crawls a soft, fleshy, ghostly-white creature that will turn brown over a few hours. You’re welcome for the nightmare fuel.
There you have it. Gems of wisdom no one asked for. They say knowledge is power. But in this case, I’d say knowledge is unnecessary. But still fun!
Sometimes it’s surprising how quickly politicians can step in it, even when they’re trying to say something legitimately important or helpful.
In trying to convince the public that people who can’t work remotely need the support of other New Yorkers during the current wave of COVID-19 infections, New York City Mayor Eric Adams artlessly referred to cooks, messengers, shoe shiners and Dunkin’ Donuts employees as “low-skill workers” who “don’t have the academic skills to sit in a corner office.”
Eric Adams just said u201cLow skill workers like cooks, messengers and Dunkinu2019 Donuts employees donu2019t have the academic skills to sit in a corner officeu201dpic.twitter.com/KaoY9MNZ8J
To be fair, he was trying express support for the workers he seems to insult, but it came across all wrong. His remarks set off a firestorm of responses from people who have worked as service workers and who took issue with the idea of those jobs being “low-skill.”
I second that. I’m a Grocery store worker and I challenge anyone to come and work one single holiday week of their choice and then call us “low skill”nnI’ve been working in a grocery store for 8 years now and I’m terrified of trying to be a server in a restaurant.
Hardest job I’ve ever had. You get in the weeds and the whole place goes down. A restaurant has to run like a Ferrari engine just to keep that from happening. Waited tables next to a guy with an MBA as well. This guy has no clue.
I cleaned toilets, swung a pick axe, hauled garbage and climbed inside dry cleaning machines, among other things, to get my JD magna cum laude from Harvard. I think we can put to rest the notion that the skills required are low or that people who do those things can’t think.
“There’s no such thing as a ‘low-skilled’ worker.”
“Anybody can flip a burger at McDonald’s” not actually true. Also, frankly, a lot of the office workers I know also don’t have a great deal of academic skill. You don’t need to be a rocket surgeon to answer phones.
— You, in the bushes. (@You, in the bushes.) 1641331053
Let’s be honest, academic skill isn’t necessary for most office jobs in the first place.nnIt’s just an acceptable way to filter “less desirable” applicants.nnI’m confident I could teach the folks from my local Dunks to do most jobs at my firm. All they’d need is time to learn.
Naturally, different jobs require different skills, and “academic skills” could mean a lot of different things. But “low-skill” has an insulting ring to it
Adams tried to clarify his meaning in an interview on CBS This Morning, saying, “The goal is we need to open the city so low-wage employees are able to survive.”
If he meant “low-wage,” he probably should have said so. And that correction doesn’t really address the “lacking-the-academic-skills-for-a-corner-office” thing.
Some people pointed out that “low-skill” or “unskilled” jobs are an actual category of work, meaning that they don’t require any specialized education or long-term training. However, that wording minimizes the skills that are required to succeed in many of those jobs, so perhaps we should reconsider that wording altogether.
What Mayor Adams really meant was that people who work in jobs that can’t be done remotely still need to be paid during the pandemic. Is encouraging office workers to go into the office in the middle of a raging pandemic so they can help keep those people employed the way to go? Questionable, but everything is questionable right now.
What’s clear is that while his intentions may have been good, his delivery definitely needed some polishing. Don’t insult a large swath of your constituents by saying they don’t have the brains for a corner office. Not a good message, not a good look.
If you grew up in the ’90s then you were part of the last generation of kids who lived without being constantly connected to the internet. You lived during that last gasp of the analog era where most of your entertainment came on tape and if you wanted a new pair of Guess jeans or LA Gear shoes, you had to drive to the mall.
Also, if you wore pants that looked like this, people actually thought you were cool.
Families mattered on Friday nights.
People listened to rock ‘n’ roll because it was important.
Hip-hop was at its peak.
People spent time talking to each other instead of staring at their phones.
It was a time of hope and optimism.
Some folks over at Reddit have been sharing funny memes that explain exactly what life was like in the ’90s. From the terrible pastel-colored designs that were everywhere to the charming, but antiquated, technology kids today will never understand.
Look, we get it. That suspiciously stuffy nose is giving you anxiety. Have you really lost your sense of smell? Maybe it’s just congestion? You start kicking yourself. Was the grocery store trip to get Haagen Dazs really worth it?
To ease the worry, you do the next responsible thing: you get tested. Hooray! It’s negative! Your instinct to announce the good news to the world is both urgent and insistent.
However, that negative test result you post to social media might have some less-than-positive outcomes.
A warning has been issued that negative test results posted online are being used to supply fake COVID-19 passes. And doctoring them is quite easy.
One man reported to a local British newspaper (the Lancashire Telegraph) that he was given a negative test by a friend, and then it was only a matter of changing the name and birthdate before that COVID-19 test passed as his own. Even the date can be edited to better reflect the required time limit.
“People are doing this as you can’t get a Covid test if you have to travel to Pakistan in case of an emergency. It is difficult to get one unless you are a key worker,” he told the Telegraph.
For some, this is an attempt to avoid the exorbitant prices being charged for legitimate tests through private clinics.
Shabaz Ilyas, who paid to have an authentic PCR test, told the Telegraph:
“This is in addition to the extortionate prices the airlines are already charging…As usual, a mini industry has been created to exploit people. This is just another example of discriminating against the poor, who are already facing financial problems.”
These counterfeit tests have become the new fake IDs — sold for somewhere around £50 (about $68) in the U.K. — and can be used to enter venues and, as mentioned, travel. Which, of course, defeats the purpose of getting tested in the first place and risks the safety of those in close proximity to the person using the black market results.
Shahzad Ali, CEO of security training platform Get Licensed, marked the use of fake COVID-19 passes as “inevitable” according to Wales Online, saying that “there is obviously going to be a market…because there will be people who want to go about their life like normal and not have to take Covid tests for things they didn’t have to before.”
And it’s not like similar situations haven’t been happening already. Stories of fake vaccination cards made from social media posts have been making headlines since early 2021. Though it’s a disappointing aspect of humanity, this is certainly nothing new.
“Whilst grossly unethical and potentially very dangerous, it is also illegal to use/supply/distribute fake Covid passes and could see you rack up a fine of £10,000 should you be caught,” he added.
In order to avoid this “new complication,” Ali’s advice is, of course, to avoid posting on social media. Not as cathartic, perhaps. But infinitely safer.
Forbes also shared that another travel solution in the near future might be using an app called CommonPass, which gives users a secure digital health pass, including a private COVID-19 test status.
Forbes writes:
“After downloading the app, a traveler can get a Covid-19 test at a participating lab and pull the results right into the app. The traveler can also complete any additional screening questionnaires required by the destination country. Finally, CommonPass confirms that the traveler is compliant with all entry requirements and generates a QR code which can be scanned by airline staff and border officials.”
As always, social media can be a force for good and for ill. As this pandemic continues, so too does the motto, “stay safe.” That includes online.
“Trending” bourbon whiskey probably doesn’t mean much to the average consumer. To us, it’s an insight into what’s headed our way — or exciting people — in whiskey as 2022 comes into focus. To help us figure out what the new year brings, we turned to the brand new Drinks International Annual Brand Report.
While that name sounds super inside baseball, bear with us. Drinks International is really about what you’re drinking, according to people who own and manage the world’s best bars. The yearly brand report asks the owners, managers, and head bartenders from the World’s 50 Best Bars to list the three brands they’re both selling the most of and also see trending according to what their consumers are ordering more often.
Or, as Drinks Internationalputs it, “the Trending lists offer an indication of the brands that are hot right now.” Easy enough, right?
To that end, we’re listing the top ten trending American whiskey brands of 2022 — we’ll get to the best selling stuff next. All of them are bourbons. So we decided to reach into our archives and call out our favorite bottles from each brand to help you find the whiskey that drinkers like you are apparently ordering with more common frequency at the bars right now.
While this doesn’t come from only one percent of Jim Beam barrels or go through a special secondary aging cycle, this bourbon is Jim Beam’s high watermark when it comes to Kentucky bourbon. The juice is aged in a bottled-in-bond facility for four years where it’s also bottled at 100 proof with no bullshit.
This is the standard Beam bourbon mash bill but there’s just something extra happening that makes this expression shine.
Tasting Notes:
This bourbon beckons you in with notes of toasted oak, red cherry, and vanilla. That leads to fresh honey, sweet caramel corn, rich toffee, bold vanilla, crisp apple, more of that red cherry, peppery spice, and a note of fresh mint. With a little water, the dram edges towards bitter dark chocolate with a nice billow of pipe tobacco while holding onto the mint, toffee, and vanilla oakiness. The end is long, meandering, and full of warmth, fruit, spice, and bourbon goodness.
Bottom Line:
Jim Beam is a classic for a reason. It delivers every single time and is amazingly well priced. What could be “hotter” than that?
9. Heaven Hill — Heaven Hill Bottled-in-Bond 7-Year
Heaven Hill makes a lot of whiskeys. This expression has been a touchstone bottled-in-bond since 1939 and remains a go-to for many bourbon lovers. The juice is very low rye (only ten percent) mash bill that’s left to age for an extra three years.
Tasting Notes:
The nose on this is like a vanilla ice cream scoop that’s been drizzled with salted caramel and then dipped in dried honeysuckle petals inside an old leather pouch. That caramel and dried floral honey feel drive the taste towards a somewhat dry graham cracker maltiness with a touch more of that leather and a whisper of toffee tobacco. The end leans into an eggnog spice mix with more of that sweet and buttery tobacco and a final note of sweet cherry and old cellar beams.
Bottom Line:
Heaven Hill’s brands are vast and varied. It feels like the distiller of bigger names like Larceny, Elijah Craig, and Rittenhouse is starting to get plenty of love for their own brand-name whiskey from whiskey drinkers. It’s easy to understand why with an outstanding bottle like this bottled-in-bond.
Frank Sinatra was one of Jack’s biggest fans. So much so that the crooner was buried with a bottle. The actual juice in this expression is a throwback to how Jack was made in Sinatra’s day. They use special “Sinatra Barrels” that have concentric grooves carved into the newly charred oak, giving the whiskey more surface area to do its thing. Once the juice is aged, it’s blended with traditional Old No. 7 and proofed at 45 percent, as it also would have been back in Sinatra’s heydays.
Tasting Notes:
Peach cobbler, apple pie with a buttery crust and caramel drizzle, vanilla pods, old leather, and a hint of cherry tobacco inside an old wooden box build on the nose. The sip leans into the fruit next to woody spice and soft leather that mellows dramatically towards a soft vanilla cream along with a very distant echo of cherry tobacco chewiness. The mild spice (think nutmeg) arrives late and is tied to a cherry syrup vibe that just touches on dry wicker, faint almonds, and a touch more of that tobacco. Ultimately, the leather returns and builds towards a silken finish with just the right balance of woody apple, cherry tobacco, and oaky spice — all touched by the softest note of vanilla bean.
Bottom Line:
This is the best-selling American whiskey in the world. That success has caused a lot of the so-called “cool” kids to dismiss it for way too long. With Chris Fletcher and Lexie Phillips guiding the distilling and blending process these days and dropping some of the most interesting new releases in the game, Jack Daniel’s is primed for a massive renaissance.
Just taste a little of this Sinatra Select and you’ll be convinced.
This expression is all about finding the best barrels in the Heaven Hill warehouses and letting that whiskey shine on its own. These are released three times a year and have been winning award after award. The whiskey in the bottle is generally at least 12 years old and bottled with no cutting down to proof or filtration whatsoever, thereby letting the barrel shine on its own.
Tasting Notes:
This is all about the red, tart, and sweet berries in vanilla cream with a clear sense of the berry brambles — think leaves, stems, seeds, thorns, and even a little dirt. That vanilla drives the palate with a hint of light green pepper spice that gives way to a mid-palate that’s a medley of fresh blackberry, blueberry, and raspberry. Those berries take on a dried rose note as a rich berry-laced and slightly spiced tobacco drives home the sip.
Bottom Line:
Heaven Hill’s Elijah Craig is killing the game right now with their barrel-proof releases. Each one is unique and delicious in its own right. There’s no way this brand is losing any heat anytime soon.
This is the mountaintop of what Wild Turkey can achieve. This is a blend of the best barrels that are married and bottled untouched. That means no filtering and no cutting with water. This is a classic bourbon with nowhere to hide.
Tasting Notes:
Crème brûlée greets you with a nice dose of Christmas spices, mild pipe tobacco, orange zest, and a distant hint of fresh mint sprigs. There’s a pine resin nature to the woody flavors on the palate that accents the orange oils, spices, vanilla, and sweetness. The sip takes on a Christmas cake-feel late, with a velvet end that is just the right amount of everything you want from a bourbon.
Bottom Line:
Wild Turkey went through a similar fate as Jack Daniel’s where it took a lot of shit for being ubiquitous, thanks to Wild Turkey 101. That was always bonkers. Turkey has consistently been putting out stellar juice for decades and the pinnacle of that is their Rare Breed Barrel Proof.
This is Maker’s Mark classic wheated bourbon that’s bottled at “a higher proof” to bring about a “richer flavor.” Well, that’s what the label says anyway. Beyond that, this was a “Traveler’s Exclusive” up until the pandemic. Now, you can find it on most shelves, making this one finally accessible to the masses. This is classic Maker’s that’s treated with a little less of that limestone water to let the barrel techniques shine a bit more while still holding onto the Maker’s vibe.
Tasting Notes:
This is a bowl of stewed apple over vanilla ice cream that’s been drizzled with extra caramel. The taste really focuses on that caramel, with hints of oak next to roasted almonds, cinnamon, nutmeg, dry wicker, and a drop of soft mineral water. The end lingers while it fades through salted caramel apples towards a mellow floral spiciness with a dried reed finish and a touch of vanilla tobacco chew.
Bottom Line:
Maker’s will always be hot shit. There’s a shine to this wheated whisky’s image that’s supported by excellent bourbon in the bottle that helps it stay relevant from generation to generation.
This is classic Bulleit Bourbon that’s aged up to ten years before it’s blended and bottled. These barrels are hand-selected to really amplify and highlight the classic flavors that make Bulleit so damn accessible in the first place.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a lot going on with butter and spicy stewed apples, maple syrup, Christmas cakes full of nuts and dried fruit, and a hint of savory herbs all pinging through your olfactory. The palate brings about smooth and creamy vanilla with plenty of butter toffee, sourdough crust, more X-mas spice, cedar bark, and a hint of dried roses. The finish is long, warming, and really embraces the toffee and spice.
Bottom Line:
Bulleit topped this list in the past but has fallen only slightly in recent years. Still, this ten-year bourbon remains a fantastic sourced bottle that really shows the wonderful things to come from the brand as they start putting out their own juice from their massive new distillery.
This is the whiskey that heralded a new era of bourbon in 1999. Famed Master Distiller Elmer T. Lee came out of retirement to create this bourbon to celebrate the renaming of the George T. Stagg distillery to Buffalo Trace when Sazerac bought the joint. The rest, as they say, is history — especially since this has become a touchstone bourbon for the brand.
Tasting Notes:
Classic notes of vanilla come through next to a dark syrup sweetness, a flourish of fresh mint, and a raw leather that veers towards raw steak. The palate cuts through the sweeter notes with plenty of spices — like clove and star anise — next to a hint of tart berries underneath it all. The end is long, velvety, and really delivers on the vanilla and spice.
Bottom Line:
People love Buffalo Trace Bourbon. It’s easy to see why. It’s generally findable, though allocated. It’s also still affordable compared to a lot of the other offerings from the legendary distillery. Oh, and it’s pretty damn easy to drink. Though, I like to use it more for cocktails than sipping.
This expression takes the standard bourbon above and gives it a finishing touch. The bourbon is blended and moved into new barrels that have been double toasted but only lightly charred. The juice spends a final nine months resting in those barrels before proofing and bottling.
Tasting Notes:
There’s a welcoming aroma of marzipan, blackberry, toffee, and fresh honey next to a real sense of pitchy, dry firewood. The taste drills down on those notes as the sweet marzipan becomes more choco-hazelnut, the berries become more dried and apple-y, the toffee becomes almost burnt, and the wood softens to a cedar bark. A rich spicy and chewy tobacco arrives late as the vanilla gets super creamy and the fruit and honey combine on the slow fade.
Bottom Line:
Woodford Reserve feels like Maker’s Mark in that it’s an OG classic that will always be great. The great part of this whiskey — and this expression, in particular — is that you can easily find and afford it while not sacrificing anything in the taste department.
This is a delicious sipping whiskey that makes killer cocktails. That’s all you really need.
1. Michter’s — Michter’s Single Barrel 10-Year Bourbon
The juice in this bottle is a little under wraps. Michter’s is currently distilling and aging their own whiskey, but this is still sourced. The actual barrels sourced for these single barrel expressions tend to be at least ten years old with some rumored to be closer to 15 years old (depending on the barrel’s quality, naturally). Either way, the juice goes through Michter’s bespoke filtration process before a touch of Kentucky’s iconic soft limestone water is added, bringing the bourbon down to a very crushable 94.4 proof.
Tasting Notes:
The nose opens with subtle notes of soft wood and worn leather next to light touches of dark berries, orange oils, egg nog spice, a slight toffee sweetness, and a touch of marshmallow. The palate starts off equally soft with something more akin to maple syrup sweetness which then leads into a rush of berry brambles. The mid-palate hits on a bit of dark spice, vanilla tobacco, and dark cacao leading towards espresso bitterness. The finish leans into a dry-yet-almost-sweet oak with a touch of an almond shell and dry grass coming in at the very end.
Bottom Line:
It’s not surprising to see Michter’s atop a trending list of whiskeys in 2022. This is the darling of high-end bars and whiskey aficionados alike. It helps that the juice in their wide range of expressions tends to be some of the best in the biz — like this bourbon. This bottle is the bourbon that a lot of distillers are chasing right now, and it’s easy to see why once you take a sip.
Texas rising star Tobe Nwigwe had a breakout 2021 and looks to carry that momentum into the new year with his new video for “Passing Through.” Produced by Tobe himself as well as his longtime production partner Lanell Grant and directed by Nate The Director, who shoots most of Tobe’s videos, “Passing Through” features familiar imagery from throughout the Tobe Nwigwe cinematic universe — monochrome costumes, the mint-colored interior of Tobe’s home, the rapper’s family, which includes his wife Fat and his two babies, and picturesque scenes from around their Alief, Texas community.
Lyrically, the song focuses on Tobe’s spirituality — another common theme of his music — but strips down the blasting beats and his boisterous bars for a more contemplative, peaceful direction, which reflects the song’s subject well. “This world is not my home,” Tobe sings. “I’m just a passing through.”
Nwigwe’s busy 2021 included a long streak of videos as part of his Get Twisted Sundays campaign, which saw him collaborate with a number of his fellow indie rap vets such as Big KRIT, D Smoke, Lil Keke, Bun B, Trae The Truth, and even Fat, who contributed a verse to their final jam of 2021. That all culminated in Tobe’s first-ever late-night television performance and his addition to the 2021 Roots Picnic. Keeping that same energy, he’s already kicked off 2022 with his latest Get Twisted Sundays single and a new NFT which he’s auctioning off on January 16. Find more info for that here.
In a surprising win for Netflix, the third and final season of its Lost in Space reboot has now dominated the Nielsen streaming chart for two weeks in a row, making it the most streamed show from November 30 to December 12. The reboot starring Toby Stephens, Molly Parker, and Parker Posey dropped it’s final season on December 1, and that was enough of a runway for it take down stiff competition that included Hawkeye and the insanely popular children’s series CoComelon.
The exact tally was 1.018 billion, beating out runner-up CoComelon, which had 835 million viewing minutes across the preschool favorite’s 15 episodes.
Lost in Space‘s most-viewed episode among the 28 made available on Netflix was its Season 3 finale, according to Nielsen. Viewing overall held fairly steady from week to week, dipping from 1.2 billion to 1 billion. The show’s third and final season was added to Netflix on December 1. Marvel’s Hawkeye drew 527 million minutes of streaming to finish sixth.
Lost in Space‘s dominance at the top of the charts is surprising given the show received tepid reviews when its first season debuted on Netflix back in 2018. However, this writer can attest that the series evolved into a solid sci-fi romp in its second season that walked a fine line between family-friendly and overly gritty. By its final season, Lost in Space delivered a compelling interstellar drama that did what very few shows get to do: Stick a cohesive landing that expertly tied the whole series together.
Dan Orlovsky, a former NFL quarterback who works for ESPN as a football analyst who is good for breaking down film in a way that even a dimwit like myself can understand, is known for saying some occasionally wild stuff on Al Gore’s internet about food (examples: “potato chips are gross,” “soup is gross,” “lobster is gross“). We’ve all shared a food take or two in the past that isn’t popular, as humans have their own unique palates and everyone experiences things differently. Ok, fine, it happens!
Having acknowledged that, Dan, my guy, we gotta talk. The Sicilians, centuries ago, came up with a really good dessert called “cannoli” that literally every single person I have ever met who can eat fried dough and cream enjoys. ESPN producer Dominique Collins had one for breakfast today, which, I’ve never done that but shout out to Dominique for this it sounds perfectly acceptable.
Current level of Italian: I just made myself a cannoli for breakfast.
When you really think about it, cannoli and chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream have some similarities, so no harm in this, not even a little! Now we get to Orlovsky, who cursed my timeline with this:
Wanna be honest here-respectfully—cannolis do not taste good. Ever
Dan Orlovsky, what in the name of all that is holy are you doing. All this tells me, a person whose last name ends with the letter “o,” is that you’ve never had a cannoli by a person who knows how to make one, preferably one that is fresh. It’s a light, crispy shell stuffed with a sweet ricotta cream and has stuff like chocolate chips in it! This is very tasty! Seeing as how hard sheep’s milk cheese is a newer thing for Orlovsky, I would go as far as to say that he’s just never had really good Italian food, although previous statements indicate that is not the case, at least when it comes to chicken parmesan, even if I would quibble with that being “the best Italian dish ever gifted to us humans.”
I would like to formally invite Dan to join me in either Little Italy in Lower Manhattan or on Arthur Avenue in the Bronx, where we will go on a bar crawl, only with cannoli. A cannoli crawl, if you will. I will fly to New York on my own dime to make this happen. God as my witness we will find you one (1) cannoli that Dan Orlovsky will enjoy.
The moment I knew I would love Yellowjackets, Showtime’s slow-burn piece of splatter art, was four minutes into the first episode when one of the main characters is listening to “Today” by the Smashing Pumpkins. The pilot also includes songs from Liz Phair (“Supernova”), Salt-N-Pepa (“Shoop”), Hole (“Miss World”), and PJ Harvey (“Down by the Water”). Yes, Yellowjackets is partially set in the 1990s, why do you ask?
Yellowjackets is an extremely good show with an equally good soundtrack, including an addictive theme song from Craig Wedren, the lead vocalist of Shudder to Think, and Anna Waronker, formerly of that dog. It’s not to the level of the Succession theme (what is?), but if you press Skip Intro while the song is playing, well, you know what happens in the first scene of the show? That’s where I’m going to throw you.
“For the theme, we aimed to channel our off-kilter ‘90s roots into something that felt like ‘then’, but could only have been made NOW, just like the show,” Waronker and Wedren told Brooklyn Vegan. “Our respective pedigrees as front-people for that dog. and Shudder to Think made it eaaaasy, like a nice warm bloodbath.”
You can listen to the theme song above, and the official Yellowjackets playlist below.
The Yellowjackets soundtrack comes out on Lakeshore Records on January 21.
While we’re not adherents to “dry” January, we do appreciate slowing things down a bit as the year resets. Enter the lower alcohol cocktails. And the absolute mountaintop of great lower ABV cocktails is the iconic Americano. It’s devilishly easy to make and packs a wonderful flavor punch.
The Americano is a Campari-based cocktail that pre-dates the Negroni by about half a century. The original mix of Campari, sweet vermouth, and sparkling water dates back to the 1860s and became a huge hit among American tourists in the early 1900s. That drink was so popular amongst those tourists, the barmen in Milan’s famed Campari bar renamed the drink after them in the 1920s.
Beyond the history, this drink is super easy to make. You don’t need any fancy equipment or skills really. You just need a little booze and a glass. So, let’s get into it!
This is pretty straightforward. You’re going to need some Campari, obviously. I’m using Carpano Antica sweet vermouth because that’s what I have in the fridge. I also have some San Pelligrino around, so that’s the water I’m cutting this with. That’s pretty much it.
Zach Johnston
What You’ll Need:
Highball glass
Jigger
Barspoon
Pairing knife
Method:
Fill your glass with ice.
Add the Campari and sweet vermouth then top with sparkling water. Stir once.
Cut a thumb-sized section of peel from the orange and then express the oils over the drink.
Drop the peel in the glass and serve.
Bottom Line:
Zach Johnston
This is everything I want right now. It’s light yet bursting with flavor. It’s slightly bitter in the sense of dry botanicals next to a floral sweetness that’s bright and delicious. There’s a plummy fruit depth that’s nice, with the orange really adding a bright counterpoint.
There’s also a smoothness at play that just works wonders right now. You feel like you’re drinking something substantial without a massive alcohol kick. It’s an eye-opener that really takes the edge off, kind of like an average-ABV beer. Which, I’d argue, is just right for January sipping.
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