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Last week, Josh Hawley made waves when he focused on a matter that’s truly tearing the country apart. No, not the Trumpist misinformation, spread in part by him, that drove legions of the former president’s supporters to attack the Capitol building. His major worry is that men are no longer masculine enough, at least not for him, and that they’re too busy with video games and porn. He was naturally dragged for this take, and so in a recent interview with Axios, he did what all conservatives do when confronted over their ideas: He doubled down. And thus so did people on social media.

The Missouri congressperson, whose own state dislikes him and whose attempts to rehab his insurrectionary image haven’t gone so hot, sat down with Axios, where he talked about making revived masculinity — and not, say, spreading voter fraud lies — his pet issue. Hawley claimed that men are being blamed for America being “systemically oppressive.”

He also repeated his much-mocked claim about what men are doing instead of being manly men. “We’ve got to say that spending your time not working — and we have more and more men who are not working — spending your time on video games, spending your time watching porn online, doing nothing, is not good for you, your family, or this country.”

Axios asked him to elaborate on a couple points. One: What, to him, even is a man? “Well, a man is a father,” he replied. “A man is a husband. A man is somebody who takes responsibility.”

Another sticking point was Hawley’s claim that progressive/feminist ideas are directly responsible for men retreating to video games and onanism, if that’s even what they’re doing. “I think the liberal attack, the left-wing attack on manhood says to men, ‘You’re part of the problem,’ it says the your masculinity is inherently problematic, it’s inherently oppressive.”

When pressed if his policework was based on hard data or just a “hunch,” Hawley said it had something to do with “de-industrialization,” then attempted to connect the evolution of employment in America and the world with watching Pornhub.

“I think you put together lack of jobs, you put together fatherlessness, you put together the social messages that we teach our kids in school, I think we’ve got to confront that and its effects,” he said.

When Hawley’s doubling down was made public, some on social media worried about his priorities.

Or wondering if by going after video games and porn he was simply telling on himself.

Others wondered if it was traditionally masculine to whine about a perceived dearth in masculinity.

Some wondered if perhaps the idea of masculinity has simply evolved.

Others generally mocked him.

You can watch a clip of Hawley’s Axios sit-down in the video below:

(Via Axios)

Not everyone in Hollywood is nice, but those who are can be really, really nice. Will Smith appears to be among the latter. The superstar has a new memoir en route, simply called Will, and between excerpts and media appearances, we’ve been learning a lot we didn’t know about him. Some of it is worrying (he once contemplated suicide and thought about killing his father). Some of it is juicy (he considered amassing a “harem,” then thought otherwise). But here’s one story that is unambiguously heartwarming.

As per The Hollywood Reporter, Smith was not exactly happy when Warner Bros. announced they were moving their entire 2021 slate to day-and-date releases, which is to say in theaters and on HBO Max at the same time. That included King Richard, the biopic in which Smith plays Richard Williams, father to tennis legends Venus and Serena. That also meant the cast could potentially make less money, as streaming could — and often has — eaten into theatrical profits.

Smith, of course, would be fine. He’s unimaginably wealthy. But his costars aren’t. So Smith took a payday that could be as high as $40 million and cut everyone some checks — what THR refers to as “a nice bonus,” on top of what they were already receiving from Warner.

Everyone was, of course, extremely grateful. In a recent chat with Access Hollywood, cast member Tony Goldwyn gushed about the erstwhile (and about to be replaced) Fresh Prince:

“I’ve been doing this for over 30 years. I have never worked with anyone as generous as Will. What you said [he gave bonuses/gifts to all of the talent] is true. When this movie, when Warner Brothers decided not to release it, to put it out on streaming, there was a lot of controversy as people know and we just got a call from Will saying, ‘I’m going to make this right.’ I’ve never experienced it, I was floored. I just couldn’t believe it.”

But Smith didn’t stop at bonuses. According to young actress Layla Crawford, he bought some cast members new phones and other goodies:

“He gave us Polaroid cameras and different treats all the time. He’s just such a generous and sweet person. He also gave us iPhone 12 Pro Max gifts in boxes. We ripped them open and everyone started crying. I literally cried my eyes out — it was the best gift ever,” she explained. “Will Smith is a blessing, I learned so much from working with him.”

In summary: Will Smith isn’t perfect, but at the end of the day he’s one of the good ones.

(Via THR)

When you cram a mass of humanity onto a stadium floor, and those humans are fans of the performer on stage in front of them, anything can happen. People have been crushed in mosh pits before—the Who and Pearl Jam concerts have seen multiple fans trampled to death in a concert, for example.

So when eight people were killed and dozens more injured at rapper Travis Scott’s Astroworld Musical Festival in Houston last Friday, it was definitely tragic but not totally unprecedented. What was hard for people to grasp was how the tragedy was handled in real time by the people with power to do something about it.

Viral video shows two young concertgoers desperately trying to get a cameraman to stop the show because people were dying. One of them, Seanna Faith McCarty, pleaded with him to tell someone to stop the show, pointing toward the crowd and saying that people were dying. Another concertgoer, identified on Twitter as Ayden Cruz, stood on the ladder of the camera platform and also yelled at the cameraman to stop the show.

Watch:

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“Stop the show” and the staff did nothing. This shit is fucking heartbreaking #AstroWorld vc:@JanthonyOliverapic.twitter.com/5vVZKLKV7h

— Ashmelyud83cudde9ud83cuddf4 (@Ashmelym)
1636211245

Here’s another angle of the attempt to alert the crew member to the deadly situation on the ground.

People even rushed the camera men, and they still continued the show. n#ASTROWORLDFestpic.twitter.com/vIw4pMr7CG

— Ethan Froneberger (@LDCMOA)
1636183082

However, no one stopped the show. According to Insider, at one point, Scott can be heard over the loudspeaker saying: “Who asked me to stop? You all know what you came here to do.” Insider also reports that concertgoer Cody Hartt said he alerted security that people were being crushed, and they allegedly responded, “We already know, and we can’t do anything to stop the show. They’re streaming live.”

McCarty detailed the story of how she ended up on the camera platform, desperately trying to get someone to stop the show and do something about the deadly conditions in the crowd.

She described how she and her friend had wanted to be close to the stage, but ended up a ways back, on the side near a walkway. They were surrounded by chest-high metal barriers, and she said after waiting two hours for the concert to start, “Every gap was filled. Where your feet were placed was where they stayed.” The energy of the crowd rose as the start time neared.

“Within 30 seconds of the first song, people began to drown—in other people,” she wrote.

“There were so many people. Tall men, women. Women and men where the only thing they could see was the back of the person in front of them. The rush of people became tighter and tighter. Breathing became something only a few were capable of. The rest were crushed or unable to breathe in the thick, hot air. My friend began to gasp for breath, and she told me we needed to get out. We tried. There was nowhere to go. The shoving got harder and harder. If someone’s arms had been up, it was no longer a possibility to put it down. So, people began to choke one another as the mass swayed. It became more and more violent.”

She went on to describe how people were screaming for help and begging security for help.

“None of that came,” she wrote. “We continued to drown. More and more. One person fell, or collapsed, it doesn’t matter how it started. Once one fell, a hole opened in the ground. It was like watching Jenga tower topple. Person after person were sucked down. You could not guess from which direction the shove of hundreds of people would come next. You were at the mercy of the wave. I watched my friend be dragged away from me and lost sight of her. I began to realize in that moment that there is a way to die that no many people know about. Being trampled to death.”

McCarty described the “shrieks of animals” and “sinkholes of people” all around her. She was shoved toward the ground and saw the body of a man, followed by “layers of fallen people.”

“I felt a primal fear rip through me, and I’m not sure anyone understood the magnitude of the situation below,” she wrote. “I screamed there were people on the floor. There were people. Unconscious. Being trampled by every foot that slammed into the ground as each individual tried to keep themselves upright.”

A man finally grabbed her and pulled her out and away from the sinkhole of people. She was able to make her way to the back of the crowd, where she found people “just standing there. Like nothing was happening. Like people weren’t dead a few feet from them.”

She spotted the cameraman on the platform and climbed the ladder to get his attention. She pointed to the hole, telling him people were dying. He told her to get off the platform.

“I screamed over and over again,” she wrote. “He wouldn’t even look in the direction, so I pushed the camera so it pointed toward where I had just come from. He became angry. He called someone else up. I told him the same thing. People were dying, we needed to stop the music, we needed help, we needed attention towards the mass because I thought if only these people were aware, maybe they would do something. The other man grabbed my arm, and told me he would push me off the 15ft platform with no sides if I didn’t get down. I told him to help. I told him people were dying. I showed him where. He wouldn’t look in the direction either. I was in disbelief. Here were two people that could actually do something. Had the power to do something. Cut the camera, call in backup, pause something. They did nothing.”

Then the crowd started booing at her. “They pointed their fury at me, unleashed a rage,” she wrote. “I screamed people were dying over and over. No one would listen.”

Finally, she climbed down from the platform and called 911. The operator told her they were calling the medical team in. She told them over and over that the concert needed to be paused to give the crowd light and awareness of the deaths. Nothing happened.

Two medical workers arrived and McCarty explained what she’d seen. They said they’d gone in and seen nothing. Two girls who had also been in the pit were nearby and explained what and where it was and they all led them to it. They climbed over the barrier and went through the people.

In her post, McCarty reassured readers that her friend made it out okay. But at least eight concert-goers were killed in the melee and 25 were taken to the hospital, including a 10-year-old in critical condition, according to USA Today. The names of the victims has been released: Mirza Danish Baig, 27; Rodolfo Peña, 23; Madison Dubiski, 23; Axel Acosta Avila, 21; Franco Patino, 21; Jacob Jurinek, 20; Brianna Rodriguez, 16; and John Hilgert, 14.

Here’s to the people like Seanna McCarty who did everything in their power to get help for the people trapped in and trampled by the crowd. In the face of a frenzied mob, keeping your head and having the courage to take action is admirable, especially considering how many people neglected their basic sense of humanity in this situation.

Very few days — and sometimes hours — go by without Marjorie Taylor Greene making headlines. It’s not because the Georgia representative is doing her job; she’s been booted from most congressional committee seats over her deranged beliefs and habit of harassing colleagues. But she has a lot of time to tweet or say something bizarre to reporters. But even for her this one’s leftfield: On Monday, she went off on an epic tweet thread in which she tried to find “common ground” with the Islamic faith, to the bafflement of everyone.

It began innocently, with the possibly doomed Greene talking about how her job sometimes involves her visiting various government facilities, like jails. But on a recent trip to a D.C. prison, she discovered something surprising: Among the reading material inmates, who are of various faiths, are provided includes The Final Call, the newspaper put out by Nation of Islam minister Louis Farrakhan. (Greene simply called it “Louis Farrakhan’s Nation of Islam newspaper.”)

Is it surprising to see a noted conservative praising a) the Islamic faith, which the GOP has spent the last 20 years demonizing and b) noted anti-Semite Louis Farrakhan? It sure is! But she found one thing they can agree on: The far right and Louis Farrakhan both hate life-saving vaccines that have emerged in the midst of a once-in-a-century public health crisis.

Oh, and they both love horse drugs, too. Among the other things Greene learned by flipping through Farrakhan’s paper is that “the Nation of Islam sees the use and benefit of Ivermectin and is very angry that our media, Democrats, and Dr Fauci have attacked the drug and refuse to save people’s lives by not promoting it and shunning the use of it.”

Greene made sure people knew she was “strongly opposed to radical Islam.” But there was a but. “But I do believe in freedom of religion guaranteed to us by our Constitution.” And so she offered an olive branch to the Nation of Islam on the basis that both groups see eye-to-eye on vaccines and horse drugs.

It’s hard to make a dent in the news cycle nowadays, but even with Bari Weiss’ weird substack university and Ted Cruz still railing against Big Bird, a far right extremist joining up with Louis Farrakhan stuck out.

Then again, Greene does believe in “Jewish space lasers,” so maybe she and Farrakhan would get along.

Maybe you saw the Squid Game meme floating around last week jokingly asking people to name five feature-less French Montana tracks. The Twitter trolls can cool their jets, because when French Montana releases They Got Amnesia, his fourth full-length album, on Friday, they’ll see that 10 of its 20 tracks have no featured guests. And while the Bronx rapper took it upon himself to respond, he doesn’t have anything to prove as a singular force.

That being said, the tracklist (below) for They Got Amnesia dropped today and the list of featured guests is eye-popping and shows how well-respected of a collaborator he is across the spectrum. In addition to the already released “Panicking” with Fivio Foreign, the album will feature appearances from Rick Ross, Doja Cat, Saweetie, John Legend, Pop Smoke, Drake, and a whole lot more.

They Got Amnesia is out 11/12 via Coke Boys, Bad Boy, Epic. Check out the full tracklist below and pre-order it here.

1. “ICU”
2. “How You King?”
3. “FWMGAB”
4. “I Don’t Really Care”
5. “Splash Brothers” (feat. Drake)
6. “Touch The Sky” (feat. John Legend & Rick Ross)
7. “Mopstick” (feat. Kodak Black)
8. “Stuck In The Jungle” (feat. Pop Smoke & Lil Durk)
9. “Panicking” (feat. Fivio Foreign)
10. “Handstand” (feat. Doja Cat & Saweetie)
11. “The Paper”
12. “Tonight Only”
13. “Didn’t Get Far” (feat. Fabolous)
14. “Business”
15. “Push Star” (feat. Coi Leray)
16. “Striptease” (feat. Ty Dolla $ign & Latto)
17. “Bag Season” (feat. Lil TJay)
18. “Prayer” (Skit)
19. “Appreciate Everything”
20. “Losing Weight”
Bonus: “FWMGAB Remix” (feat. Moneybagg Yo)

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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Lyla suffers from complex regional pain syndrome (CRPS) in her leg. The pain is “worse than childbirth and getting something amputated,” she told Rocket. But her passion for baking was a helpful distraction.

The dream team rolled up to Lyla’s bake sale, which had been created to fundraise money for pain treatment. Rocket asks, “Do you think you would be able to bake for us?” and the little girl’s face instantly lights up so bright it could melt glaciers.

@charlie This little girl with a rare disease has no idea her entire life is about to change in 24 hours…🥺❤️ #fypp #kindness #foru ♬ IMPERIAL PIANO – Treia Music

As the video shows, Lyla’s baking is more than a hobby. It’s a God-given talent. She effortlessly mixes, rolls and decorates cookies by hand, complete with bright pink frosting to look like adorable pigs. All with a smile on her face. With skills like that, it’s no wonder that her dream is to own her own bakery someday.

Little does Lyla know that “someday” will be as soon as tomorrow.

“Lyla has no idea that we’re surprising her with her own bakery for 24 hours, and we’re gonna try to raise 100,000 dollars.”

And not just any bakery, a bakery owned by Lia Holt, winner of TLC’s “Next Great Baker.” Holt told Fox News “As soon as I met Lyla, my heart just melted. I’m like, I was a kid and my dream was to be a baker, own a bakery. Now, I can’t wait to help make her dreams come true.”

As Rocket leads a blindfolded Lyla to her soon-to-be bake shop, he tells her “I have a surprise for you.” The blindfold lifts, and Rocket tells her that for the next 24 hours, the bakery Lyla sees will be hers, and that the entire city is invited to buy her cookies. Lyla’s reaction is nothing short of heartwarming.

@charlie This girl suffering from a rare disease has no idea her entire life is about to change in 24 hours…🥺 #fypp #kindness #foru ♬ Happiest Year – Jaymes Young

But wait! There’s more!

Rocket had one more surprise. After learning about Lyla’s fondness for pigs, the TikTok star surprised her with a baby piglet of her very own. I don’t know which is more endearing: the swaddled piglet or the girl’s sweet happy tears after getting everything she’s ever wanted.

The bake sale was held on Sunday, Nov. 7 and the money earned went toward her CRPS pain treatment. If you want to support Lyla’s dream, you can do so through this website.

Rocket finds people to help like Lyla through his Dreamr app. On his website, he writes:

“We dream of a world where there is an abundance of opportunity for everyone. We dream of a world where our fellow human beings remember that in their heart lives a profound force of limitless potential. It is our core belief that if the world can inspire a dream within someone, it is within their power to achieve it.”

He encourages you to share your own dream on the app, which you can find and download here.

In the age of quick bops and catchy choruses, kids today have no appreciation of the value of long, intricate, dynamic musical pieces. Yes, I just used the phrase “kids today.” It’s happened. I’m old.

Songs serve two purposes. One, to elicit a certain mood, feeling or ambiance. And two, to regale a compelling story. Longer songs can easily do both. There’s something cinematic about them. And if done well, long songs become iconic. Case in point, the mini opera of Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody,” which by all accounts should not have received astronomic radio play, but did.

A nostalgic, impassioned Reddit thread began when one person asked the simple question: “What is your favorite LONG song (over 7 minutes)?”

Here were some of the highlights. Maybe some you know, maybe some will surprise you.

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“I Feel Love” by Donna Summer

Ah, this song is a psychedelic delight. It’s so good, it’s so good, it’s so good that the Blue Man Group recreated their own kooky version of it. Yes, it’s a dance song, but man does it transport you to a place where love is real, but time, somehow, is not. Is it dreamy? Oh yes. But is it pure fluff? Certainly not. Not to mention its innovative and artistic use of synthesizers gave disco music a never-before-heard futuristic up-level.

As this is the “beach day song” for me and my boyfriend, I was personally happy it made the list.

“Echoes” by Pink Floyd

Not sure we can have a “list of long songs” without mentioning Pink Floyd. This band is pretty much synonymous with intricate rock compositions. “Echoes” in particular is a fan favorite, and a song that surprisingly came by accident when a rotated speaker caused an interesting feedback sound that became the beginning of this legendary science fiction acid trip set to music.

Roger Waters explained in an interview that the meaning behind the song was to explore “the potential that human beings have for recognizing each other’s humanity and responding to it, with empathy rather than antipathy.” With lyrics like:

“Strangers passing in the street
By chance two separate glances meet
And I am you and what I see is me.”

…I’d say that checks out. This song is really more of a rock ‘n’ roll mediation, above anything else.

“Roundabout” by Yes

Not many songs can boast popularity in both the rock and anime crowds. But this one can. The progressive rock tune from 1971 makes an appearance in the 2012 anime “Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure” as the show’s ending theme song.

But what really makes this song a standout is its use of “deceptive cadence,” which is basically putting a note or chord in an unexpected place. Not to mention there are approximately 57 false stops where you think the song is about to end. It doesn’t. Not for a whopping eight-and-a-half minutes. There’s so much that shouldn’t work musically in this song, that for some magical reason does. So it doesn’t surprise me that it made the list.

“Sinnerman” by Nina Simone

Originally an African American spiritual song, “Sinnerman” weaves the tale of a man running from God on Judgment Day. Spoiler alert: He doesn’t succeed. Simone masterfully mixes the Southern styles of blues and jazz, making it even more of a religious experience. According to an article on udiscovermusic.com, Simone would often close out performances with this tune in order to “shake people up.” And since it has everything from plinking piano sound to an all out rock ‘n’ roll guitar solo, how could it do anything but shake people up?

If you’ve never heard Simone’s epic “Sinnerman,” listen now. And repent.

“Albuquerque” by Weird al Yankovic

That’s right. The Parody King himself made the list. I truly saved the “weirdest” for last. This song, the final track of Al’s “Running With Scissors” album, is just shy of 12 minutes. It’s a long, meandering odyssey for the ears created as Al himself said, “to annoy people.” The full lyrics never even made it to the album’s liner notes (you know, those little pamphlets that came with the now-ancient CDs). Instead, it includes an apology from Yankovic and a cheeky message that the listeners will have to just finish the song to get all the lyrics. Well played, Al. Well played.

It’s a story that starts off with force-fed sauerkraut that logically leads to a contest to guess the molecules in Leonard Nimoy’s butt, and then a one-way ticket to (you guessed it) Albuquerque. Somehow a plane crash, donuts, weasels and a “one-nostriled” man are involved. Oh and a love story is crammed in there.

There were several honorable mentions I could list: Led Zeppelin, Tool, The Velvet Underground, Iron Maiden. But despite the subject matter of this article, I wanted to keep things brief.

One thing’s for sure, there’s still a hefty amount of appreciation for musical sagas that really take us on a journey. I’m sure Billie Eillish will get the idea eventually.

Most of us want to share our life with a partner who is our best friend. But what if that best friend isn’t a romantic partner? Why should that stand in that way of having what most people long for? The truth is: Finding an enduring kind of love is special, and something worth investing in, even if it’s not romantic love. And for April Lexi Lee (aka @psychottie on Tikok), it’s the kind of love shared between her and her best friend of 11 years.

“This is for everyone who believes that their soulmate is their best friend,” Lee said in her video urging viewers to “normalize platonic life partners.”

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@psychottie On some @cultclare & @jazmelodyy type shit. #platoniclifepartner ♬ original sound – April Lexi Lee

She continued: “My best friend is my soulmate. She’s the platonic love of my life. She’s who I choose to do life with. After 5 years of long distance, we finally manifested a way for her to move to LA [from Singapore] to be with me.”

Lee posted another video of the two reuniting, and it feels like something out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. The two run into each other’s arms for a long embrace, with the caption “what a long term, stable, healthy partnership can look like in 2021.”

@psychottie Don’t mind me just romanticising my #platoniclifepartnership 🥰 @hotmilkwong #platoniclifepartner #bostonmarriage #tiktoksg🇸🇬 #tiktoksg ♬ Home – Edith Whiskers

Lee noted that her friends and family called them both “crazy,” to make such a big move, to which Lee responded, “we would not be questioned as much about this if we were lovers.”

It’s a valid point. We swoon over movies where the leading man makes it to the airport just in time to profess his forever feelings to a woman he’s known for like three days, but somehow this 11-year relationship doesn’t warrant such a gesture?

Lee argued that their friendship of more than a decade had lasted longer than most couples her age. And more importantly, they were committed to each other and shared a vision for the future. “We see a life together,” she explained. “We wanna buy a house together, we wanna start a retirement fund together, we might even adopt a child together and raise it as friends.”

Even though this dynamic is not seen as a traditional in our society, many have done it (and done it well). People were even inspired to share their own “PLP” success stories in the comments:

“I was raised by my mom and her best friend (mom #2). They love each other in a platonic way and do everything together.”

“Me and my bestie are buying a house together this year. We have already lived together for 15 years.”

“My boss did that with her friend. They even bought a house together. They’re still going strong after 35 years. It can be done.”

Not only does Lee normalize this relationship, she romanticizes it. Just look at the beautiful love book she created when their relationship status was still long distance. It’s filled with cutesy cartoon images and funny heartfelt messages like:

“I can’t wait for the day you finally come.
I’ll share my space with you, and your many alarms.
To learn how to adult and how to survive.
To go on road trips with you.
I even look forward to you pushing my limits, because we know to be sick of each other is a privilege.”

Seriously, find yourself a person who looks at you the way Lee does her bestie, platonic or otherwise.

@psychottie Reply to @psychottie we so cute and we out here 🤩 @hotmilkwong #platoniclifepartner #longdistancerelationship #ldr @LoveBook ♬ Monkeys Spinning Monkeys – Kevin MacLeod

“My mind is blown right now. It just never occurred to me this was an option, and I love it and I want it!” wrote one person in the comments (um, yeah, same here!). This is why normalizing all kinds of healthy relationships is vital. We’re better able to see what’s possible.

The bottom line is: Romantic love is not king. As Lee put it, “If marriage is not for you and you want to start a life with your best friend, then do it!” What really matters is finding someone who excites and challenges you, who promotes a sense of health and safety, and who you’re happy to “do life” with.

Excuse me while I go make a love book for my bestie.

Earlier today, Missy Elliott received her well-deserved star on Hollywood’s Walk of Fame. The iconic rapper not only inspired other Black women to follow their dreams of music industry stardom, she also inspired decades of rappers to work with Timbaland and then to copy the fish lens effect of her “The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)” video. Ok, I kid, but it is true. She’s a stylistic innovator and Monday morning’s ceremony featured Lizzo, Ciara and Mona Scott-Young all honoring Elliott.

But it was Lizzo’s speech that hit the strongest chord. The pop singer fought back tears as she professed her adulation for Elliott, telling her that “I saw a superstar in you, but I’d also seen myself. I’d never seen myself and you lived so boldly and so beautifully and so unapologetically and so out loud.”

Lizzo moved from emotional to elated, frequently yelling uncontrollably as she was overcome with emotions. “I only have one thing to say to Hollywood Blvd: You’re welcome!” she began. She stopped herself early on to let the Hollywood Blvd crowd know that she hadn’t prepared a speech since she thought she “was just coming to hang out.” Then she added “And now I’m about to cry!,” before delivering this impromptu, yet incredibly moving speech:

“You are the brightest star in the universe Missy. I’ve watched you my entire life. And I saw a superstar in you, but Ive also seen myself. I’d never seen myself and you lived so boldly and so beautifully and so unapologetically and so out loud. You have no idea what you have done for so many Black girls. We don’t deserve you. We don’t deserve Missy Elliott and still you continue to give to us, and given with your heart. Your genius. Let me just drop some words: Genius! Icon! Queen…queen of hip-hop! Visionary! I want to thank you so much for helping me in my career. I never in a million years thought I’d get to meet you and not only did I get to meet you, but we worked in the studio together! Thank you for making my dreams comes true. You have no idea what you mean to all of us Missy. We love you. We celebrate you. God Bless You. This is more than deserved. Let us continue to celebrate all of your accomplishments and your influence forever. We love you so much Missy. Congratulations.”

Watch Missy Elliott’s star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame be unveiled below.

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

Any trip to a craft brewery usually means buying a flight of seasonal beers. There might be a Saison, likely an IPA or two (there are always a few IPAs), perhaps a lager or pils, maybe an end-of-the-season pumpkin ale, a stout, and maybe even a porter.

We’re focusing on that latter style today. And while stouts and porters used to be pretty much the same thing, modern incarnations do vary. It mostly comes down to how deeply malted the barley is for the mash — with stouts often getting a harder/hotter roast during that process. From there, things can vary as significantly as any beer style with yeasts, hops, water, and even aging all coming into play. It may sound like a lot of detail but, in the end, it’s more fun to just try a few and go with the flow until you find the one that you really like.

To find the best examples, we’ve once again turned to the bar professionals. We asked a handful of well-known bartenders to tell us the one porter they’ll be drinking this fall and winter. Keep scrolling to see all of their picks so you know what to stock up on in the coming months.

Great Lakes Edmund Fitzgerald

Christian Beretta, bartender at South Seas Island Resort in Captiva, Florida

ABV: 6%

Average Price: $10 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

A new favorite is the Great Lakes Brewing Edmund Fitzgerald Porter. Its beauty is in its simplicity. Named for the ship that met a tragic ending, this ale is a benchmark for the style and is never out of fashion. It is roast forward in profile with pleasing coffee and chocolate undertones and a slight chalky ash finish.

Lefthand Death Before Disco

Lewis Caputa, lead bartender of Rosina inside The Venetian Resort in Las Vegas

ABV: 6%

Average Price: $11 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

Lefthand Death Before Disco is my go-to. I love a porter that brings nutty and coffee flavors and this porter brings both. It’s a perfect beer to drink while the leaves are falling in your backyard while firing up the BBQ.

Russian River Shadow of a Doubt Porter

Christopher Rodriguez, lead bartender at Lucy Bar in Yountville, California

ABV: 9.86%

Average Price: $7 for a 16.9-ounce bottle

Why This Beer?

My favorite porter is the Russian River Shadow of a Doubt Porter. I may be biased since it is a local porter, but its smoothness with notes of chocolate and spice is perfect for fall. It’s not always easy to find. But, if you can find it, buy it.

Breckenridge Nitro Vanilla Porter

Austin Sheffield, bartender at 8100 Mountainside Bar & Grille in Beaver Creek, Colorado

ABV: 5.4%

Average Price: $10 for a four-pack

Why This Beer?

Breckenridge Brewery Nitro Vanilla Porter is a local brew made just right down the road from our hotel. I encourage guests to sip on this brew while taking in the beautiful mountain scenery while sitting at our outdoor, wood-burning fire pits onsite. Not to mention it compliments pretty well with the smores everyone is usually roasting by the firepits.

Funky Buddha Last Snow Porter

Lauren Navarro, head bartender at Apothecary 330-A Cocktail Bar in Fort Lauderdale, Florida

ABV: 6.3%

Average Price: $14 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

My favorite porter to drink in the fall and winter would be Funky Buddha’s Last Snow. It has great elements of chocolate and coffee without being too overbearing. It’s a well-balanced porter.

Founders Porter

Brendan Pineda, manager and buyer at Plumpjack Wine & Spirits in San Francisco

ABV: 6.5%

Average Price: $11 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

I’d have to go with Founders Porter. It’s robust, chocolaty, and silky all at the same time. There’s a reason it’s one of the best-selling porters on the market. It’s classic, rich, and always there for you any time of year.

Evil Genius Purple Monkey Dishwasher Porter

Ed Watt, bartender at Sabroso + Sorbo at The Notary Hotel in Philadelphia

ABV: 6.7%

Average Price: $12 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

My pick is Purple Monkey Dishwasher from one of our local breweries in Philadelphia, Evil Genius Beer Company. It’s a chocolate and peanut butter porter that tastes so good during the cooler months here in Philly.

Hill Farmstead Everett Porter

Chevy Farrell, beverage director for No Man’s Land in Fort Lauderdale, Florida

ABV: 7.5%

Average Price: Limited Availability

Why This Beer?

If you haven’t heard about this brewery, you’re missing out. Nestled in Vermont cheese country, this passionate bunch is putting out magical brews. This porter is dark and toasty with a touch of effervescence while maintaining a creamy mouth feel. It offers dark malty notes including chocolate and medium roast coffee. What is there to say about this beer aside from, “If you know, you know.”

Maui Coconut Hiwa Porter

Christian Taibi, head mixologist at The Surfjack Hotel & Swim Club in Honolulu, Hawaii

ABV: 6%

Average Price: $11 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

Maui Brewing Co. has a wonderfully interesting porter called Coconut Hiwa, which has all the tradition of a dark ale with an interesting hint of roasted coconut and mocha. It’s a perfect marriage of flavors for the fall and winter months.

Spiteful God-Damn Pigeon Porter

Alex Barbatsis, head bartender at The Whistler in Chicago

ABV: 8.2%

Average Price: $12 for a four-pack

Why This Beer?

God-Damn Pigeon Porter from Spiteful Brewing is a seasonal Chicago favorite and for good reason. Its malty, rich flavor is buoyed by the not overly heavy body of the beer that makes it ideal for drinking on a chilly night or with a chocolatey dessert.

Deschutes Black Butte Porter

Roger Eyles, general manager, and sommelier at Mister Mao in New Orleans

ABV: 5.2%

Average Price: $11 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

Black Butte Porter from Deschutes Brewery in Bend, Oregon is my pick. It is crisp, toasty, and dark without being overly heavy on the palate, and it is fairly inexpensive.

Gnarly Barley Korova Peanut Butter Porter

Jess Collins, beverage director at Toups Meatery in New Orleans

ABV: 6.2%

Average Price: $11 for a four-pack

Why This Beer?

I’ve been digging the Korova Milk Porter by Gnarley Barley as of late. It’s a Baltic oatmeal milk porter that has tasty roasted coffee and chocolate flavors. It drinks super easy for a dark brew and pairs well with comfort food. Have a pint with a burger or a meat board and you’re good to go.

Ribstone Creek Old Man Winter Porter

Mallory O’Meara, author of GIRLY DRINKS: A World History of Women and Alcohol

ABV: 6.5%

Average Price: $15 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

Even though winter is in the name, I love Old Man Winter Porter the very moment the temperature drops below 65 degrees. This porter is wicked roasty on the nose and the tongue. It’s got strong cocoa notes without being too sweet or intense. It’s just lovely.

Saugatuck Peanut Butter Porter

Emily Franchy, bartender at Uffda Hospitality in Louisville, Kentucky

ABV: 5.7%

Average Price: $11 for a six-pack

Why This Beer?

Saugatuck Brewing’s Peanut Butter Porter is the perfect mix of slightly sweet and nutty without being too rich. I could drink multiple glasses all fall and winter long, and I do!

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