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3 moments that might convince you Edgar Allan Poe was a time traveler.

This story was originally published on HistoryBuff.

I’m pretty positive that Edgar Allan Poe had (has?) the power to travel through time. Hear me out on this one.

It’s not just the well-known circumstances of his life — orphaned at a young age, father of the mystery novel, master of cryptology, maestro of the macabre. Nor am I referring to the head-scratching details of the days leading up to his death: how he was found on the street near a voting poll wearing someone else’s clothes, and during his subsequent hospitalization, he was alleged to babble incoherently about an unidentified person named “Reynolds.”


And I won’t even get into the confounding reports of a nameless figure who, for seven decades, would show up to Poe’s gravesite in the early hours of his birthday with a glass of cognac and three roses.

Tragic and curious, yes, but hardly evidence that the acclaimed horror writer could transcend the limits of space and time. No, my time travel theory concerns the author’s creative output, which you’ll soon see is so flukishly prophetic as to make my outlandish claim seem plausible — nay, probable!

The proof is in the pudding, and the pudding is a loosely linked map of flesh-eating floaters, crunched skull survivors, and primordial particles. OK, here we go…

Exhibit A: “The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket

Photo by Albert Sterner/Wikimedia Commons.

Published in 1838, Poe’s only completed novel details a mutiny on a whaling ship lost at sea. Out of supplies, the men revert to cannibalism, drawing straws to elect a sacrifice. A boy named Richard Parker draws the shortest straw and is subsequently eaten.

Now here’s where it gets weird(er): In 1884, 46 years after the novel’s publication, four men would be set adrift following the sinking of their yacht. Shipwrecked and without food, they too would go the survival cannibalism route, electing to kill and eat a 17-year-old cabin boy. The boy’s name: Richard Parker.

The extraordinary parallel went unnoticed for nearly a century, until a widely-circulated letter from a descendant of the real Parker outlined the similarities between the novel’s scene and the actual event. The letter was selected for publication in The Sunday Times after journalist Arthur Koestler put out a call for tales of “striking coincidence.” Striking indeed.

Exhibit B: “The Businessman

Image from the collection of Jack and Beverly Wilgus/Wikimedia Commons/Wikimedia Commons.

In 1848, a railroad worker named Phineas Gage suffered a traumatic brain injury after taking an iron spike through the skull. Somehow he survived, though his personality would change drastically. These behavioral changes were closely studied, allowing the medical community to develop the first understanding of the role played by the frontal lobe on social cognition.

Except for Poe, who’d inexplicably understood the profound personality changes caused by frontal lobe syndrome nearly a decade earlier. In 1840, he penned a characteristically gruesome story called “The Businessman” about an unnamed narrator who suffers a traumatic head injury as a young boy, leading to a life of obsessive regularity and violent, sociopathic outbursts.

Poe’s grasp of frontal lobe syndrome is so precise that neurologist Eric Altshuler wrote, “There’s a dozen symptoms and he knows every single one… There’s everything in that story, we’ve hardly learned anything more.” Altshuler, who, to reiterate, is a medically-licensed neurologist and not at all a crackpot, went on to say, “It’s so exact that it’s just weird, it’s like he had a time machine.”

Exhibit C: “Eureka

Photo via NASA/Wikimedia Commons.

Still unconvinced? What if I told you that Poe predicted the origins of the universe 80 years before modern science would begin to formulate the Big Bang theory? Surely, an amateur stargazer with no formal training in cosmology could not accurately describe the machinery of the universe, rejecting widely-held inaccuracies while solving a theoretical paradox that had bewildered astronomers since Kepler. Except that’s exactly what happened.

The prophetic vision came in the form of “Eureka,” a 150-page prose poem critically panned for its complexity and regarded by many as the work of a madman. Written in the final year of Poe’s life, “Eureka” describes an expanding universe that began in “one instantaneous flash” derived from a single “primordial particle.”

Poe goes on to put forth the first legitimate solution to Olbers’ paradox — the question of why, given the vast number of stars in the universe, the night sky is dark — by explaining that light from the expanding universe had not yet reached our solar system. When Edward Robert Harrison published “Darkness at Night” in 1987, he credited “Eureka” as having anticipated his findings.

In an interview with Nautilus, Italian astronomer Alberto Cappi speaks of Poe’s prescience, admitting, “It’s surprising that Poe arrived at his dynamically evolving universe because there was no observational or theoretical evidence suggesting such a possibility. No astronomer in Poe’s day could imagine a non-static universe.”

But what if Poe wasn’t of a day at all, but of all the days?

What if his written prophecies — on the cannibalistic demise of Richard Parker, the symptoms of frontal lobe syndrome, and the Big Bang theory — were merely reportage from his journey through the extratemporal continuum?

Photo from Dodd, Mead and Company/Wikimedia Commons.

Surely I sound like a tinfoil-capped loon, but maybe, maybe, there are many more prophecies scattered throughout the author’s work, a possibility made all the more likely by the fact that, as The New York Times notes, “Poe was so undervalued for so long, there is not a lot of Poe-related material around.”

I’ll leave you with this quote, taken from a letter that Poe wrote to James Russell Lowell in 1844, in which he apologizes for his absence and slothfulness:

“I live continually in a reverie of the future. I have no faith in human perfectibility. I think that human exertion will have no appreciable effect upon humanity. Man is now only more active — not more happy — nor more wise, than he was 6000 years ago. The result will never vary — and to suppose that it will, is to suppose that the foregone man has lived in vain — that the foregone time is but the rudiment of the future — that the myriads who have perished have not been upon equal footing with ourselves — nor are we with our posterity. I cannot agree to lose sight of man the individual, in man the mass… You speak of “an estimate of my life” — and, from what I have already said, you will see that I have none to give. I have been too deeply conscious of the mutability and evanescence of temporal things, to give any continuous effort to anything — to be consistent in anything. My life has been whim — impulse — passion — a longing for solitude — a scorn of all things present, in an earnest desire for the future.”

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Cardi B Fanned Out Over Meeting Robert Pattinson And It Was Pretty Freaking Adorable

One of the best things about Cardi B as a public figure and pop star, is she doesn’t resign herself to the remove that so many celebrities adopt once they get famous. Instead, she still acts exactly like a normal person would when they meet someone famous or exciting, and her reactions when these meetings do happen are pretty priceless. She gave us another hilarious and pretty freaking adorable moment of celebrity fandom this week, when she met Robert Pattinson, aka Edward Cullen, for the first time. “Look who I met the other day ! I felt like a teen!” she wrote to caption the quick video.

At first she pretends to just be primping for a forward-facing video, before revealing her true purpose: “Come on, look at my friend guys,” she begins. But when Edward — sorry, I mean Robert — pops into the frame, all she can do is yell. Yes, it seems like Cardi was also a Twilight stan along with the rest of us. Hey, she’s the right age for it! For his part, Pattinson seemed to think the whole thing was pretty funny, but he was a good sport which really just makes me like him more than I already did. Anyway, if you like watching Cardi the celeb, catch her hosting the AMAs in just a few days.

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Offset Reportedly Owes $950,000 Towards A Rental Company For A Bentley He Misplaced

Earlier this year, Offset received a lawsuit from a rental company after a car he took from them was never returned. The rapper allegedly paid for a Bentley Bentayga to use for a video shoot from Platinum Transportation Group. The transaction occurred in the spring of 2020 at a rate of $600 per day, and while the agreement allowed Offset to keep the car for a few days, he repeatedly pushed back the return date. Finally, he confessed that he could not return the Bentley because he did not have it and couldn’t remember who last had it or where it could be.

That confession resulted in a $100,000 lawsuit, which was filed in February, but it looks like the price tag has been raised. HotNewHipHop and The Blast report that the Bentley Bentayga, which remains missing, will now cost Offset $950,027.35 after he defaulted on the rental on November 3.

In happier news, Cardi B gave birth to her second child with Offset at the beginning of September. “We are so overjoyed to finally meet our son,” they said in a statement to People. “He is already loved so much by family and friends and we can’t wait to introduce him to his other siblings.”

Cardi B is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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Kieran Culkin Wasn’t That Nice To A Certain ‘SNL’ Cast Member Back When He Was A Kid

Ever since Igby Goes Down, Kieran Culkin has been one of the best go-tos for a rude putdown. As Succession scion (and probable least good basketball player) Roman Roy, he’s arguably the show’s insult champ, snarling his way through one withering jab after another, offending strangers and close family alike. The real Kieran seems much, much nicer (although he’s not above on-set wrestling), but if a tale he told on The Tonight Show Friday night is any indication, he’s always at least had some bite.

Culkin was there to talk about the belated new season of Succession, which is currently three amazing, jaw-dropping, Nirvana-blasting episodes in. He’s not yet 40 but he’s been around for ages. His screen debut was alongside his older brother Macaulay, as the bed-wetting Fuller McCallister in the original (and newly rebooted) Home Alone. Kieran also joined Macaulay on the 1991 episode of SNL he hosted (with musical guest Tin Machine, the hard rock group fronted by David Bowie). And backstage the nine-year-old Kieran had an awkward run-in with one of its cast members.

“I remember, during rehearsal day, being on the stage, and I was with my mom. Kevin Nealon walks by and she grabs him and she goes, ‘Oh, hey, you’re great. By the way, you’re my son’s favorite,’” Kieran said. But Kieran didn’t 100% agree with her detective work. “And I went, ‘Mom, I told you he’s my second favorite. Dana Carvey is my favorite!’”

Nealon, the underrated straight man (who often played secret weirdos), seemed taken aback, Kieran thought. “I remember actually seeing him take this little tiny dagger and go… ‘Well, still very nice to meet you,’” he said.

You can watch Kieran Culkin’s entire interview in the video above and Succession returns for its fourth episode on Sunday on HBO and HBO Max at 9pm.

(Via EW)

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Aaron Rodgers Lost A Partnership With A Healthcare Provider After He Went Onto Pat McAfee’s Radio Show And Gave A Bunch Of Weird COVID Takes

Aaron Rodgers made headlines on Friday afternoon thanks to an appearance on Pat McAfee’s radio show in which he could not stop talking about why he was unvaccinated against COVID-19. The interview led to Rodgers — who is out for the Green Bay Packers this weekend after testing positive for the virus — getting a whole lot of scrutiny, and now, a longstanding partnership for the All-Pro signal caller is going out the door.

Prevea Health, a Wisconsin-based healthcare provider with whom Rodgers has partnered for nearly a decade, announced that they’ve decided to cut ties with the Packers star. While the statement it released said it would not comment further, Prevea Health appeared to imply this was a mutual decision and stated its commitment to “encouraging and helping all eligible populations to become vaccinated against COVID-19 to prevent the virus from further significantly impacting lives and livelihoods.”

During his appearance on McAfee’s show, Rodgers spread a number of falsehoods about the vaccine and stated his belief that the “woke mob” was on a “witch hunt” following the reveal that he is unvaccinated. Among the many things Rodgers said were that he’s turned to Joe Rogan for advice and that he is taking ivermectin, which he believes gets hate for being a cheap generic that cannot turn profits for pharmaceutical companies. Packers coach Matt LaFleur, when asked about the interview, said he probably won’t watch it.

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Marjorie Taylor Greene Launched Into A Kooky Rant Against The 13 Republican ‘Traitors’ Who Voted For The Biden Infrastructure Bill

Late Friday night, after months of back-and-forth (and squabbling with, of all people, stubborn Democrats), the House passed a $1 trillion infrastructure bill. Among its targets were the nation’s aging public works system, more access to high-speed internet, and the fight against climate change. It was a big deal for President Joe Biden, although other parts of his ambitious plan, including social safety net initiatives and more climate change battles, had to be put on the back burner for now. Hooray! But the vote was predictably narrow in our divided times, and among the 200 Republicans who voted against it, the most unhinged was, of course, the one who burns through her own paychecks.

As the vote was underway, with a mere 13 Republicans voting for it (by contrast, six Democrats joined the nays), Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia, who’s also lost money betting on Trump and who doesn’t understand the Declaration of Independence, railed against the about-to-be-passed bill. But she didn’t attack the Dems. She attacked those in her own party.

“Republicans who hand over their voting card to Nancy Pelosi to pass Biden’s Communist takeover of America will feel the anger of the GOP voter,” the congressperson warned.

Greene called the 13 Republicans who voted for it “traitors,” then went further, naming names and lumping them in with the ever-swelling “Squad,” which now counts six members.

The combative representative also reminded people of the gains Republicans made on Tuesday’s election, even though the wins weren’t as widespread as pundits made it out to be. (As of now, Jack Ciatarelli, who narrowly lost the New Jersey gubernatorial race to incumbent Phil Murphy, refuses to concede.) “On Tuesday, the American people rejected the Democrats platform and by Friday Republican traitors locked arms with Nancy Pelosi to pass Joe Biden’s communist takeover of America,” Greene wrote. “Your voters will send you the same message they sent Democrats on Tuesday.”

It’s what’s become a typical move for Republicans in the Trump era, intimidating anyone who stands up against the horde. Trump himself, for instance, has warned he’ll come for any Republican who voted for his second impeachment. Of course, these people were also invariably involved in the plot to overthrow America, so maybe they’re not worth listening to.

(Via Raw Story)

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Emilio Estevez Won’t Be Returning For Season 2 Of The ‘Mighty Ducks’ Show Reportedly Because Of Their Vaccine Requirement

The entertainment industry is not screwing around when it comes to COVID-19 safety. Vaccines mandates are widespread on sets, with cast and crew required to be vaccinated on the majority of sets. Those who refuse to comply are shown the door, even if they’re big names. And the latest who won’t play ball appears to be Emilio Estevez.

According to Deadline, the beloved actor will not be back for Season 2 of The Mighty Ducks: Game Changers, in which he reprised the role of Gordon Bombay, who in the 1992 original movie was a grumpy lawyer forced to coach a ramshackle Pee-Wee hockey team. This comes, as per Deadline, “after weeks of back and forth with his team over the show’s Covid vaccination requirement.” Estevez’ reps have so far not commented, but the source says he “has declined to provide assurances that he would comply with the policy.”

When Estevez joined the cast of the Disney+ revival, which debuted in March, he was returning to the world of one of his biggest hits, which nearly 30 years ago made a mint at the box office and became a VHS staple. Estevez wasn’t the lead on the show, so this won’t require a massive overhaul. Besides, it’s not the first time his character has stepped back; in the threequel, D3: The Mighty Ducks, Gordon hands reins to another coach (Jeffrey Nordling), then spends the remainder of the movie hanging in the sidelines. But now he’ll simply be AWOL, and all because he’s appears to be another person who appears doesn’t listen to experts.

(Via Deadline)

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Rece Davis Did A Masterful Job Getting The Pole Assassin Saga Into ‘College GameDay’

Texas football, an ex-stripper, and her pet monkey caught the attention of the college football world last week. Longhorns special teams coach Jeff Banks and his partner, whose real name Danielle and used to perform under the name “Pole Assassin,” have a pet monkey who performed as part of Danielle’s routine. A tweet claimed that the monkey, named Gia, bit a trick-or-treater on Halloween.

Danielle claimed that the monkey did, indeed, bite a child, but said that the kid ignored signs and walked into the monkey’s habitat. There was a video that showed this and Texas coach Steve Sarkisian said it wasn’t a distraction, which, I don’t know how it couldn’t be to some extent but that’s for another time.

Anyway, College GameDay host Rece Davis saw all of this and decided it was his duty to get it onto Saturday’s edition of the show. What happened next was a really spectacular 13 seconds worth of words from one of the best hosts over at the Worldwide Leader in Sports.

In the lengthy history of funny College GameDay moments, this is up there with some of the best, although I prefer that time Lee Corso dropped an f-bomb on the air and both Chris Fowler and Kirk Herbstreit were rendered speechless for a second.

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Jay-Z Responds To Ye’s Claim That Just Blaze Copied His Production Style

On Thursday night, Ye’s interview with N.O.R.E. and DJ EFN on their podcast Drink Champs was released and it quickly became the talk of the music world. The interview, with ran nearly two and a half hours, predictably featured a number of controversial takes from Ye. He said the “worst thing I’ve ever done” is sign Big Sean to his GOOD Music imprint and also confirmed that his support for Donald Trump is still intact. He also claimed that producer Just Blaze stole his production style through their respective work on Jay-Z’s 2001 album, The Blueprint. In a subsequent conversation on Twitter Spaces, Jay was asked about Ye’s appearance on Drink Champs and he used the opportunity to defend his claims against Just Blaze.

“N.O.R.E. sent me a piece, I seen a couple pieces,” Jay-Z replied. “I think, you know again, everyone is entitled to their opinion and everyone can see things through their own lens. Some of it could be true, some of it may not be true, but that’s the lens that you see it through, so you’re just speaking to your truth.”

Jay then focused on Ye’s specific comments towards Just Blaze and copying his production style. “I think the one thing I’ll say out of all the pieces I’ve seen is the Just Blaze thing was a bit unfair,” Jay said. “Cause if you’re creating an album and the assignment is soul samples, everyone is coming with soul. You’re trying to make a cohesive piece of music, I don’t think anyone was copying [anyone].” He added, “I think everyone created for the project, the baby was The Blueprint and I think everyone should be prized for what we created. It’s in the, I don’t know what you call it, the Library Of Congress or something. It’s something that we all should be proud of and everyone should be prized for their contribution.”

Jay continued, “Some of those songs on there — “You Don’t Know” and “Song Cry” — are some of the pillars of that album. Everyone had a contribution I would say. I don’t think anyone was copying off of anyone.” Jay concluded, “I think we all had the assignment and created this wonderful body of work.”

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The Blazers Have Launched A Workplace Misconduct Investigation Into General Manager Neil Olshey

The Portland Trail Blazers’ longtime top basketball executive is now the subject of an investigation following allegations of “10 years of mistreatment leading to mental and physical stress,” per Chris Haynes of Yahoo Sports. Neil Olshey, who has been with the organization since 2012 and serves as its general manager and president of basketball operations, is facing a number of allegations that led to Blazers owner Jody Allen hiring an outside firm to look into them.

While the franchise and Allen declined to comment and Olshey did not respond to The Athletic, their reporting indicates at “at least” one employee reported misconduct. Haynes was able to add some details into the “toxic” environment that included “intimidation and profanity-laced tirades, among other bullying tactics.”

Olshey, 56, was hired by the franchise in 2012. Over his decade as the top basketball decision-maker, multiple employees assert they have had multiple grievances with his treatment of staff in the workplace, sources said.

Furthermore, several staff members raised concerns with the organization’s alleged “mishandling” of the situation when video coordinator Zach Cooper died in April 2020, sources said.

The Blazers confirmed the reports of an investigation on Saturday afternoon.

Olshey joined the Blazers after spending several years in the Los Angeles Clippers’ front, including a stint as the franchise’s general manager. Haynes reported that members of the organization hope that an investigation could lead to “change after feeling voiceless and unheard for so long.”