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If someone broke into your house and stole the ashes of one of your dearest friends, it’d probably be a traumatic moment with next to zero punchlines. Not for Kevin Nealon. While stopping by The Ellen Show on Wednesday, Nealon revealed that he headed out to Tennessee for a few months to ride out the pandemic, but while he was gone, his house got robbed. According to the comedian, “nothing really major” was stolen except for a few sentimental items like some watches Nealon’s fathers had left, and oh yeah, a necklace that was filled with Garry Shandling’s ashes.

While that sounds terrible, Nealon can’t help but laugh about the whole thing and say that “Garry would’ve loved this.” Before Shandling’s death, the two had been friends for almost 40 years, and Nealon kept their comedic friendship alive by dunking on his late friend and joking that Shandling gave him the ashes before he died. “He was very prepared.”

And the laughs just kept on coming. Via Entertainment Weekly:

“What I’ve learned, is when your house has been broken into, you should check the pawnshops, like if you lost a watch, or if you lost Garry,” Nealon shared as the audience roared with laughter. “I’ve been calling pawnshops and I’m saying, ‘You have not seen Garry, have you?’ They said, ‘Garry Shandling?’ And I said, ‘You may not recognize him, he’s in an urn. I’m not sure what part of him is in the urn. It might be his lips, but then again, maybe that urn’s not big enough.”

Thanks for the advice, Kevin. We’ll keep that in mind the next time someone steals the remains of a beloved comedian from our sock drawer.

(Via The Ellen Show)

Loki: Season 1 Premiere (Disney+ series) — Tom Hiddleston has an absolute blast playing the mercurial trickster of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and we shall reap the benefits while he helps (or hinders) the Time Variance Authority during the process of cleaning up the timeline. Yep, Loki’s gotta atone after snatching the Tesseract in Avengers Endgame, and we can expect plenty of theatrics (including a possible D.B. Cooper-type incarnation) from the God of Mischief. Loki’s chronically looking out for Number One, but Hiddleston did provide a catch-up course to refresh fans, although we still don’t know Loki’s true essence here — is he the somewhat reformed version of himself, or nah? Finding out will be part of the fun.

Fresh, Fried & Crispy: Season 1 — You might gain 10 pounds while watching this show, which would fit right in with Guy Fieri’s adventures. The so-called Grandfather of Food Reviews on YouTube, Daym Drops, takes a cross-country trip across the United States to find the most decadent fried foods possible. There’s deep-fried Oreos (in San Diego), extra-crispy pork chops (in Birmingham), and more on the menu, and not only does he pop into actual restaurants, but home kitchens and food trucks are also part of the hunt. Get your appetites ready.

Awake (Netflix film) — This post-apocalyptic yarn follows a mysterious global event that leaves mankind without sleep and without all electronics. A troubled ex-soldier might be able to fix things through a “cure” that happens to be her daughter, although she might lose her mind before she can piece everything together. Yikes.

Tragic Jungle (Netflix film) — This story’s set in the 1920s Mayan jungle, where lawlessness and mythical ways rule near the Mexico-Belize border. A group of Mexican workers collide with a mysterious Belizian woman, which of course sends them into a desire-filled state, although there’s something else afoot. That would be the awakening of the legendary Xtabay being that might seal their destiny.

Crime Scene Kitchen (FOX, 9:00pm) — Joel McHale’s the host of this bizarro cooking-focused reality-competition show, which sees chef teams attempt to figure out what was baked after a dessert disappears, leaving only ingredients in the aftermath. Seriously, give this show a whirl because it is oddly meditative to watch the clues come together. Also, McHale is one of the best famous-types at the art of the interview, and I’ll stand by that claim no matter what.

The Late Show With Stephen Colbert — Samuel L. Jackson, Padma Lakshmi

Late Night With Seth Meyers — Will Forte, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Brendan Buckley

The Late Late Show With James Corden — Lisa Kudrow, Clea Duvall, Rostam

Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox have been turning heads as a couple since they went public with their relationship in 2020, and Megan’s bonkers quote about her new boyfriend, along with the fact that MGK wears a necklace with her blood in it have led some to dub them the new Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton. If the shoe fits! Anyway, after recent public appearances together at the Indy 500 and the Billboard Music Awards, a trailer for the movie that started it all just dropped.

Fox, who was married before splitting with her husband to date Kelly, met the musician on set for their new movie, Midnight In The Switchgrass, where she plays an undercover FBI agent who is used as bait to help the law track down a serial killer, and in the meantime she encounters MGK’s character, and punches him in the face (!). While that doesn’t seem like the most romantic of settings, the two definitely have onscreen chemistry in the new preview. Switchgrass is the directorial debut of Randall Emmett, and it also stars Bruce Willis as Fox’s fellow FBI agent along with Emilie Hirsch, and Lukas Haas. The film will drop in theaters and be available for rent this summer, on July 23. Check out the preview above.

Last week, an impersonation of Charles Barkley by comedian Danny Rouhier went viral. As is oftentimes the case when things involving the Inside the NBA guys hit the Twittersphere and get some traction, Chuck was made abreast of what happened, and because it was a pretty good impression, he was a fan.

Following Tuesday night’s slate of NBA games, the Inside guys decided to have a little more fun with this. Rouhier surprised Barkley by making a cameo in which he interviewed the Hall of Fame inductee while doing his impersonation. Barkley was very obviously caught off guard, but despite that, he had a blast answering questions like, “How come when it’s your turn to talk, you push your right hand down on the podium like this and brace yourself like it’s a earthquake?”

Ernie Johnson, Shaquille O’Neal, and Kenny Smith all got in on the fun, with Shaq also being the subject of an impersonation that was designed to roast Barkley for only making it to the Finals once in his NBA career. But Chuck was at the center of the whole thing, and bless his heart, he laughed hysterically basically the entire time. We even got a Guarantee Button press out of it and Barkley giving his opinion of which Bogdanovic would win in a fight if Bojan and Bogdan squared off for “Bogdanovic supremacy.”

In news so absurd we couldn’t have possibly made it up, the “dumbest member of Congress” just questioned whether the U.S. might be able to stop climate change by altering the Earth’s orbit around the sun.

Republican Rep. Louie Gohmert made the comment during a House Natural Resources Committee hearing focused on combatting the effects of climate change. Claiming that a past director of NASA once told him that the orbits of the Earth and moon were changing, the House member from Texas asked Jennifer Eberlien, associate deputy chief of the National Forest System, if her organization was looking to space for answers on how to improve global warming issues here at home.

“I understand from what’s been testified to the Forest Service and the BLM [Bureau of Land Management], you want very much to work on the issue of climate change,” Gohmert began, via Gizmodo. “Is there anything that the National Forest Service or BLM can do to change the course of the moon’s orbit or the Earth’s orbit around the sun? Obviously, they would have profound effects on our climate.”

Eberlien seemed a bit stunned at the question, telling Gohmert she’d have to follow up with him regarding his orbital concerns. To be fair, she was probably trying to figure out if the Congressman was just joking because really, how can anyone be that obtuse? Gohmert responded to her answer saying, “Well, if you figure out a way that you in the Forest Service can make that change, I’d like to know.”

Now, in all likelihood, Gohmert probably doesn’t care that much about climate change and wanted to make some point about global warming being a ridiculous theory by posing his own, equally implausible solution. After all, this is the guy whose tooth fell out during a press conference and said his face mask gave him COVID — though he rarely wore it. He’s not the sharpest tool in the GOP’s shed.

Still, some people will no doubt latch onto this ridiculous idea and run with it on Reddit forums and QAnon pages so let’s set the record straight: Global warming is an absolutely real crisis that humanity is fueling far more than any changes happening to the moon’s gravitational orbit. In fact, the whole concept of Earth’s orbit changes — we circle the sun in different ways over the course of thousands of years, and sometimes we “wobble” on our axis — is something NASA has studied, written about, and given a name. They’re also fairly clear on why none of these changes to Earth’s orbit are the cause of global warming.

And yet, Gohmert doubled down on Twitter, slamming people for conflating the abbreviation for the Bureau of Land Management with the Black Lives Matter movement in an effort to make him look even more ridiculous.

As if the question in its original context didn’t do that job already. But don’t worry, Twitter had the appropriate response to Gohmert’s nonsensical answer to the global warming problem.

In an interview with The Miami Herald, Inter Miami managing owner Jorge Mas said that he is “optimistic” that Lionel Messi will play for Inter Miami in MLS someday. He confirmed that Messi and Inter Miami owner David Beckham have had “serious talks” with Messi about coming to MLS.

“David and I have been working really hard, we have aspirations of bringing the best players here and Leo Messi is a generational player, arguably the best player of all time,” Mas told the Herald. “I am optimistic Messi will play in an Inter Miami shirt because I think it will complete the legacy of the greatest player in our generation and will meet with the ambitions of the owners of Inter Miami to build a world class team.”

Messi, arguably the greatest player of all-time, is currently under contract Barcelona. But it’s reported that, as part of a new deal with Barcelona, he will play two more years in Spain and then two years in Miami. By the time he comes to MLS if this deal is accurate, Messi would be 35 or 36 years old. He’d still probably be great because he’s Messi, but it won’t be peak Messi. Considering Miami has struggled mightily since entering the league — both on the pitch and in terms of operating within the league’s rulebook when putting together its roster — it could also be like Barcelona for him that he comes to a team he has to carry.

Miami has been linked with moves for plenty of European-based stars over the years, with the team acquiring former Real Madrid and Juventus striker Gonzalo Higuain last September. Messi, obviously, is the biggest name that has been kicked around as a potential Miami player somewhere down the road.

At this point, Lauren Mayberry has a well-established career: She’s the leader of Chvrches, a successful synth-pop group that’s gearing up to release its fourth album, Screen Violence, in August. Years ago, though, Mayberry was a journalist, which she spoke about with Mark Hoppus on After School Radio on Apple Music. During the conversation, she explained why, in her eyes, she wasn’t an awesome music critic.

After Hoppus asked about her past in journalism, Mayberry said:

“I was a bad entry level journalist, yes. In my early twenties, I was doing music writing stuff. I was not a good music journalist because whenever you have to do reviews, I think if you’re in a band, […] it’s hard to review other bands the way that people, critics, want you to. Because that would be like, ‘This is where I think they might’ve taken some inspiration. It wasn’t for me, but they clearly worked hard on it, and it’s difficult to make anything, so maybe somebody will like it.’ And that’s a bad review, that’s not helpful.”

She went on to say that the experience was useful in giving her a different perspective on how the media works: “But I think it was helpful in so far as you see how the sausage is made. It gives me an insight into what the media process is a bit, and especially what it’s like for women in music as well, because I would be like sub-editing things and be like, ‘Wow, that’s a terrible headline. Why are you putting that on it? That’s not what she said.’”

Fans have been waiting patiently for Doja Cat’s new full-length album, Planet Her to drop, the follow-up to her 2019 project Hot Pink. One of the clearest signs that the record was going to be dropping soon is her new collaboration with SZA, “Kiss Me More,” — which the pair performed at this year’s Billboard Awards — but that song came out over two months ago now, and no album. But we’ve got another sign that Planet Her is going to be coming soon with a clip of a new track that Doja shared on Instagram today.

Though there’s very little actual music in the clip, the camera is whooshing through space to double down on the intergalactic feel for the record. Finally zooming in on a room decorated with art, where the long, pink nails give away Doja herself. Dubbed “Need To Know” in the video and in the pop star’s caption, the song is scheduled to drop this Friday, June 11. It’s too early to tell if this song will get caught up in a TikTok craze like her past singles “Say So” and “Streets” have, but it seems like it’s definitely going to have a space age theme. Check out the clip above and keep out an eye for Planet Her hopefully lifting off some day soon.

The Atlanta Hawks are currently locked in a 1-1 series with the Philadelphia 76ers after swiping Game 1 in Philly before dropping Game 2. As they head back to Atlanta for their first home games of the series, the Hawks received some unfortunate news regarding one of their young stars.

De’Andre Hunter has not played in either of the first two games against the Sixers, as he was listed out for both games with right knee soreness, but on Wednesday the team offered a new update that, unfortunately, brought word of a small tear in his meniscus that will require surgery and end his season.

The initial review revealed a new small tear of the lateral meniscus. Films from the MRI were sent to Dr. Neal ElAttrache of Kerlan-Jobe Orthopaedic Clinic in Los Angeles for a second opinion, who earlier today confirmed the tear and recommended surgery. Hunter is scheduled to travel to Los Angeles this weekend and undergo surgery to the lateral meniscus on Tuesday with Dr. ElAttrache. He will miss the remainder of the postseason and future updates will be provided as appropriate.

The Hawks have started Solomon Hill in place of Hunter in both games so far, with Kevin Huerter taking a bigger role and playing well off the bench. Huerter, Hill, and Danilo Gallinari all become far more important in this series without Hunter, who is the Hawks best wing defender and spent much of the Knicks series hounding Julius Randle. Without Hunter, Nate McMillan often has to choose between having more offense or more defense on the court with his wing rotation, and it’s an unfortunate loss for one of the league’s best surprises this postseason.

Dr. Anthony Fauci, the director of the U.S. National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, has (like everyone else) dealt with a lot over the past 18 months or so. He previously expressed frustrations at anti-vaxxers, along with conspiracy theorists who blame him for the virus emerging in Wuhan [with accusations that the National Institute of Health (NIH) provided financial resources for gain-of-function research], and Fauci’s also dealt with threats against his family’s safety. Things got scary, so much so that former Trump Chief Strategist Steve Bannon was banned from Twitter for his incitement of extreme violence against Fauci. Yes, Bannon really did call for the doctor’s head on a pike, and these days, Fauci’s completely had it with his critics.

Via Mediaite, Fauci sat down with MSNBC’s Chuck Todd, and yes, he talked about himself in third person, but he also threw down the emphasis: “If you are trying to get at me as a public health official and scientist, you’re really attacking not only Dr. Anthony Fauci, you are attacking science.”

Fauci continued, characterizing the attacks on him as not only literally dangerous for their threats of imminent danger but because they completely discount the value of science. “All of the things that I have spoken about consistently from the very beginning have been fundamentally based on science,” he insisted. “Sometimes those things were inconvenient truths for people, and there was pushback against me.”

What got under Fauci’s skin today was Republican Senator Marsha Blackburn feeding another conspiracy theory about how Fauci was somehow in cahoots with Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg on how the shape the COVID-19 discourse on the social media platform. “I don’t want to be pejorative against a united States senator,” Fauci explained. “But I have no idea what she’s talking about.” He went on to characterize Blackburn’s words as “painfully ridiculous.”

You can watch the rest of Fauci’s rant below.

(Via Mediaite & The Hill)