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The Essential Rum Cocktails (With Recipes) To Mix Up This August

Summer is waning yet temperatures remain high. That calls for refreshing cocktails. And we’d argue that there are no more refreshing cocktails than rum cocktails. There’s just something about rum drinks — full of sharp spices, tropical fruits, lime, mint, and even cola — that hit the exact right note on hot days.

Today, we’re calling out eight rum cocktails that you can make while you’re social distancing at home. These drinks cover a massive range of genres. They run from tropical, juice-forward tikis to the more herbaceous and spicy tropical drinks to rum versions of the classics. Then there’s the illustrious and very advanced Clarified Milk Punch, which we’re not going to get into on this list but will stan for until the wheels fall off. (You can find our full recipe here!)

The eight recipes below are all easy-to-moderate in difficulty. The last couple of drinks listed will require a few special ingredients. Otherwise, we tried to keep this as simple as possible for easy mixing, thirst-quenching, and socially distanced drinking.

Dark ‘n’ Stormy

Bottle To Use: Goslings Black Seal Rum

We’re starting things off easy.

This is a classic highball — just a matter of pouring stuff in a glass and getting your drink on. The drink needs Goslings since it’s the official cocktail of that rum. Plus, the deep molasses of the dark rum is the perfect counterpoint to a really sharp and spicy ginger beer, making for a true summer refresher.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Goslings Black Seal
  • 4 oz. ginger beer
  • Lime wedge
  • Ice

Method:

  • Fill a Highball glass with ice.
  • Add rum.
  • Top with ginger beer.
  • Stir once.
  • Garnish with a lime wedge, serve.

Cuba Libre

Bottle To Use: BACARDÍ Anejo Cuatro

If you can make a Dark ‘n’ Stormy, you can make a Cuba Libre. And no, this is not a Rum ‘n Coke. You need to add freshly squeezed lime juice to this. We’d also recommend grabbing a really good craft cola or Mexican cola.

I really dig this Jarritos Mexican Cola and Key Limes. The spice and sweetness of the cola are wonderfully accentuated by the high tartness of the smaller limes. Plus, Bacardi Anejo Cuatro is a great base for any rum-based drink.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Bacardi Anejo Cuatro
  • 4 oz. cola
  • Limes
  • Ice

Method:

  • Add ice to a highball glass.
  • Add the rum and cola.
  • Squeeze in two or three lime wedges and drop them in.
  • Stir once or twice, serve.

Rum Rickey

Bottle To Use: Mount Gay Rum Eclipse

Sticking with the highballs, this take on a Gin Rickey is a no-brainer.

It’s rum, lime, and soda and it’s also one of the most thirst-quenching drinks on the list — with no added sugars. That’s another big win if you’re planning on drinking more than one and don’t want the dreaded sugar crash hangover the next morning.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Mount Gay Rum
  • 0.5 oz. fresh lime juice
  • 4 oz. soda water
  • Limes
  • Ice

Method:

  • Fill a highball glass with ice.
  • Add the rum, lime juice, and soda water.
  • Stir once.
  • Add in three or four lime wheels, serve.

Hemingway Daiquiri

Bottle To Use: Havana Club Anejo Blanco

Okay, it’s time to break out the ol’ cocktail shaker. I’ve broken the versions of a Daiquiri down before. In this case, we’re going with a slightly more refined version than Papa’s favorite Havanese drink. Still, this is a very entry-level cocktail that’ll be a late-summer favorite the moment you take your first sip.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Havana Club
  • 0.5 oz. fresh lime juice
  • 0.5 oz. fresh grapefruit juice
  • 0.5 oz. Maraschino liqueur
  • Lime
  • Ice

Method:

  • Add the rum, liqueur, and juices to a cocktail shaker.
  • Add enough ice to fill the shaker about 1/2.
  • Top and shake until the shaker is ice cold to touch.
  • Strain into a pre-chilled coupe.
  • Spritz with lime oils and drop in the rind, serve.

Rum Old Fashioned

Bottle To Use: Diplomatico Rum Reserva Exclusiva

Most old fashioned recipes call for “bar syrup” in the base. I call bullshit on that. Use raw sugar and take the time to dissolve it in the cocktail. It’ll make all the difference in the world. This is especially true with rum-based old fashioneds. Yes, it’s a little more time consuming but the depth this step adds to the cocktail will be evident once you take a sip.

Recipe:

  • 3 oz. Diplomatico Rum
  • 2 dashes Angostura Bitters
  • 2 dashes Orange Bitters
  • 1 barspoon raw sugar
  • 1 barspoon soda water
  • Luxardo Maraschino Cherry
  • Orange Peel
  • Ice

Method:

  • Add the sugar, soda water, and bitters into an old fashioned glass.
  • Stir the ingredients until they blend into a base.
  • Add rum and stir until the sugar fully dissolves.
  • Fill the glass with ice and stir until the glass is ice cold to touch.
  • Re-top with ice.
  • Spritz orange oils over the cocktail and rub the rind around the glass, drop it in the drink.
  • Garnish with a cherry, serve.

Mojito

Bottle To Use: Koloa White Rum

This is one cocktail everyone should have in their arsenal. It’s a crowd-pleaser and generally pretty easy to make. In a perfect world, you’d make this with Havana Club 3 Años. But since Cuban rums are nearly unsourceable stateside, I recommend using a solid craft rum to add an extra layer of texture and refinement to your mojito.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Koloa White Rum
  • 1 barspoon fine white sugar
  • 1 oz. fresh lime juice
  • 3 oz. soda water
  • Fresh mint
  • Limes
  • Ice

Method:

  • Add sugar and lime juice into a highball glass.
  • Gently muddle the sugar into the lime juice until it just emulsifies.
  • Add three or four leaves of fresh mint and gently muddle into the sugar/lime juice.
  • Top the glass with ice.
  • Add the rum and vigorously stir to combine everything.
  • Top the glass with fresh ice and a squirt of lime juice.
  • Garnish with a sprig of mint and two or three lime wheels, serve.

Painkiller

Bottle To Use: Pusser’s British Navy Rum

Okay, now we’re getting into a little more advanced territory. This is a take on a piña colada that doesn’t require a blender to make. Pusser’s official cocktail is a classic tropical sipper that’s best served in a big old tin mug like you’re on the decks of a British Navy ship. If you don’t have a mug, a Hurricane glass will do just fine. And don’t forget the freshly grated nutmeg. That’s what ties this whole drink together.

Recipe:

  • 2 oz. Pusser’s Rum
  • 4 oz. pineapple juice
  • 1 oz. orange juice
  • 1 oz. coconut cream
  • Nutmeg
  • Pineapple
  • Ice Cubes
  • Crushed Ice

Method:

  • Add the rum, juices, and coconut cream to a cocktail shaker.
  • Add ice and hard shake until the shaker is ice cold to touch.
  • Fill a tin mug with crushed ice.
  • Strain the cocktail into the mug.
  • Dust with three or four grates of nutmeg on a planer.
  • Garnish with a pineapple wedge, serve.

Zombie

Bottle To Use: Appleton Estate Signature Blend, BACARDÍ Gold Rum, El Dorado 151

If you can make a zombie at home, you’re good to go for really getting your drink during these dog days of summer. Still, there’s a reason tiki bars limit guests to only two of these. Drink responsibly, please.

Okay, this is an ingredient heavy drink but worth it once you lock it in. The biggest thing to master here is the “pulsing” of the drink. Where I make these, we use an old-school milkshake machine to pulse it. You want to add air while mixing, chilling, and sort of knocking the ice around without breaking it up. Remember, this is a cocktail, not a slushie.

Recipe:

  • 1.5 oz. Appleton Rum
  • 1.5 oz. Bacardi Gold
  • 1 oz. El Dorado 151
  • 0.75 oz. fresh lime juice
  • 0.5 oz. Falernum
  • 0.5 oz. Donn’s Mix (see recipe below)
  • 1 barspoon Grenadine
  • 1/2 barspoon Pernod
  • 1 dash Angostura Bitters
  • Fresh Mint
  • Ice

Method:

  • Add everything but the mint to a blender jug.
  • Top with ice until it’s just over the top of the liquid.
  • Pulse the blender very quickly two, maybe three times. DO NOT blend.
  • Pour about 2/3 of the drink with ice into a tall Zombie glass or Chimney glass.
  • Pour the last 1/3 of the drink with a strainer over the jug to stop the ice from filling the glass.
  • Top with fresh ice.
  • Garnish with a fresh mint sprig, serve.

Donn’s Mix — 2:1 ratio of fresh grapefruit juice to cinnamon syrup mixed until emulsified.

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Mac Miller’s ‘K.I.D.S.’ Mixtape Gets Two New Songs For Its 10th Anniversary

Long before the fame and critically acclaimed albums, Mac Miller was an unknown rapper from Pittsburgh set on breaking out to the hip-hop scene. This moment would arrive in 2010 with the release of his K.I.D.S. mixtape shortly after he signed a deal with Rostrum Records. Thanks to a growing social media following and persistent touring, Miller’s spotlight would grow following his XXL Freshman Class inclusion in 2011. While the rapper is unfortunately no longer with us, his estate looks to celebrate him and the project that brought him success with a new deluxe version a decade after its release.

Uploaded to streaming services back in April, the availability of Miller’s K.I.D.S. mixtape on streaming services has allowed fans to reminisce and enjoy some of Miller’s early cuts which include “Nikes On My Feet” and “Kool Aid & Frozen Pizza.” Returning with the deluxe version of the mixtape, Miller’s old label has graced fans with two new songs: “Ayye” and “Back In The Day.”

The updated take of K.I.D.S. arrives almost seven months after his estate debuted his first posthuhmous album, Circles, with help from producer Jon Brion who Miller was working with on the album prior to his death. Similar to K.I.D.S., Circles would also receive a deluxe re-issue nearly two months after its initial release.

The addition of “Ayye” and “Back In The Day” to K.I.D.S. arrives shortly after Miller’s estate asked fans to help contribute to a new project aimed at celebrating the late rapper’s life. A toll-free number was set up to collect fans’ stories, thoughts, and well wishes for the upcoming project.

Press play on the new songs in the videos above.

Mac Miller is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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Bartenders Shout Out The Most Refreshing Beers To End Summer Strong

The strangest summer of our lives is winding down. You almost certainly didn’t take a big vacation this year. Maybe you snuck in a road trip. A day spent at a swimming hole, hiking local trails, or on a quick overnight camping trip is even more likely. Whatever the case, Summer 2020 was jarringly different.

Still, even in these dark and strange times, we have refreshing beers to see us through. Seasonal sippers that are perfect for hot August nights. While we always encourage you to support your local breweries during COVID, we know you want to give nearby bottle shops some love, too. That’s why we asked some of our favorite bartenders to tell us the refreshing beers they’ll be drinking to close out summer 2020.

Creature Comforts Bibo

Bill Myers, bartender at Kimpton Brice Hotel in Savannah, Georgia

Creature Comforts out of Athens, Georgia makes some great lagers like the Classic City Lager and Bibo. I was first drawn towards this brand because of their Tropicalia IPA, but soon realized that their lighter styles are just as good as their nationally acclaimed IPA.

Bad Dad I’ll Turn This Car Around

Payden Jones, bartender at Grains & Grill in Fairmount, Indiana

One of our favorite hazy, summer beers is Bad Dad Brewing Co.’s New England IPA, I’ll Turn This Car Around. It’s smooth, with no bitterness. Unlike the family road trip.

Monopolio Lager Clara

Sondre Kasin, principal bartender at Cote in New York City

Monopolio Lager Clara is an excellent lager for the summer. This Mexican beer is light, fresh, crisp, and still has a lot of flavor.

Perfect for barbecue, Mexican food, and while sitting outside in the sun.

Kona Longboard Island Lager

Eva Al-Gharaballi, bartender at Datz Restaurant Group in Tampa, Florida

Summer is perfect for light lagers. Kona Longboard Island Lager is my favorite lager from one of my all-time favorite breweries. Hydrating with a smooth aged flavor.

Schofferhofer

Melissa Reigle, beverage manager and head bartender at Byblos in Miami

Summer is citrus. Schofferhofer has a fantastic grapefruit hefeweizen that’s perfect for summer drinking or try your local brewery. If you’re looking for something else, Miami’s MIA Brewery offers Miami Weiss, a lightly yeasted, flavorful summer Weiss. Or just add a little sprite to your Lowenbrau and enjoy a radler.

Brooklyn Summer Ale

Hayden Miller, head bartender at Bodega Taqueria y Tequila in Miami

Brooklyn Summer Ale. Round, slightly malty, and extremely drinkable. This beer is refreshing and light enough for those hot sunny days — aptly deemed a ‘sunny pale ale’.

Three Weavers Cloud City

Steve Livigni, food and beverage partner at Hotel June in Los Angeles

I’m really loving Cloud City Hazy IPA from Three Weavers. It’s just light, easy, and delicious with tons of great citrus notes. It’s great with food, too.

Sixpoint Jammer

Nazar Hrab, beverage director at The Pineapple Club in w York City

There are so many different opinions and so many craft beers, it’s hard to pick just one. As long as you know which style you’re in the mood for and as long as it’s crisp and cold, you really can’t go wrong. For this, I’ll go with Sixpoint Jammer. It’s refreshing, tangy, and highly crushable.

Writer’s Picks:

Rogue Newport Daze

Potentially the best beer to drink near a body of water on a hot day, Rogue Newport Daze is a refreshing hazy pale ale with hints of juicy tropical fruits that’s well suited for sitting in a gravity chair and not worrying about what time it is.

Springdale Pearly White Ale

Summer was made for hazy wheat beers like Springdale Pearly Wit. This 4.5 percent ABV country-style wheat is full of flavors like coriander and orange zest. It’s refreshing, subtly tart, and pairs well with tank tops and flip flops.

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The Clippers Beat The Nuggets To Secure The No. 2 Seed In The West

The Clippers went into their Wednesday night showdown with the Nuggets with a chance to secure the No. 2 seed in the West, and they did just that with a 124-111 victory, setting them on a collision course with the Dallas Mavericks in the opening round of the playoffs starting next week.

They did it behind big games from their two main stars, with Kawhi Leonard and Paul George finishing with 26 points and 27 points respectively, leading all scorers on the night despite some spotty shooing stretches from each of them.

Nikola Jokic was his usual MVP-level self in the loss, finishing with 17 points, 13 assists, and seven rebounds on the night, but it was Jerami Grant who led the way for Denver with a 25-point outburst on 9-of-14 shooting, including 4-of-7 from three-point territory.

As if we needed reminding, Jokic showed again in the first half why he’s one of the best passing big men in the game today with this full-court bomb to Michael Porter Jr. for the layup. It was one of six assists for Joker in the first half, to go along with 15 points, as he led Denver to a 58-50 lead at the break.

Bol Bol continued his solid play in the first half, putting up seven points on 3-of-4 shooting and throwing down a highlight-reel dunk on the break.

Kawhi had 14 points in the first half and came out firing in the third quarter, and the Clippers were able to close the gap and take a 70-63 lead, thanks to a 13-0 run midway through the period.

George had a rough shooting start, going 3-of-13, and 1-of-5 from behind the arc in the first half, but he hit back-to-back threes in the third quarter to help build the Clippers’ lead.

But Grant came up big for the Nuggets during that stretch, scoring 13 points in the quarter, and he capped it off by throwing down a huge jam with the clock winding down to give Denver a 92-90 advantage heading into the final frame.

Lou Williams was his usual self, dropping 22 points in just over 24 minutes of action off the bench Wednesday as he continues to work his way back into a rhythm.

The Clippers took their largest lead of the game midway through the fourth quarter, 108-99, thanks in part to George, who came alive after a slow start, scoring 19 points in the second half, including several big shots down the stretch to keep the game out of reach.

For Denver, the loss locks them into a first round matchup with 6-seeded Utah (after OKC locked down the 5-seed with a win over Miami) that figures to be very interesting, as neither team is currently at full strength and will have to continue adapting to new rotations in the playoffs. The full Western Conference playoff bracket is now set aside from the wild chase for the play-in series and a date with the Lakers.

1. Los Angeles Lakers v. 8. Blazers/Grizzlies/Suns/Spurs
4. Houston Rockets v. 5. Oklahoma City Thunder

2. Los Angeles Clippers v. 7. Dallas Mavericks
3. Denver Nuggets v. 6. Utah Jazz

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Jimmy Butler On Chris Paul Throwing The Ball Off Duncan Robinson: ‘You Gotta Deal With Me’

The Heat and Thunder met on Wednesday night in a battle between mid-seeds in the East and West, with Oklahoma City able to sew up the 5-seed out West with a win and secure a matchup with the Houston Rockets in the first round.

Miami, which is locked into a matchup already with Indiana after the Pacers win earlier in the day, came out as aggressive as ever, and the game lived up its billing as a showdown between two of the league’s most pleasant surprises this season — and edgiest squads. That edge for both comes from their star players and leaders in Chris Paul and Jimmy Butler, and unsurprisingly, those two had a bit of a spat late in the second quarter.

Paul stripped Duncan Robinson in the corner and then had plenty to say to the young sharpshooter, and then after stealing the inbounds pass from Butler to Robinson, pelted Robinson in the back with the ball to avoid being trapped in the corner and give OKC possession.

It is an incredibly Chris Paul sequence, and on the next trip down the floor, Butler made sure to send Paul a message on behalf of his teammate, dipping his shoulder into Paul’s chest and knocking him to the floor.

After the game, Butler was asked about the brief back-and-forth and made it clear that he won’t tolerate anyone, even a friend like CP3, going after his young teammates.

We likely won’t to see any further payoff of a Butler-CP3 pester-off in the bubble, but it’s clear that both stars are looking to set a tone for their teams going into the playoffs. Paul, in a game that was meaningful but not absolutely critical for OKC, was continuing to give it all on the defensive end and do anything he could to win his team extra possessions, while Butler sticks up for his guys and only continues to assert himself as a leader on the Heat who will do what’s necessary for his teammates.

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A Trump Staffer’s Attempt To Insult Kamala Harris By Comparing Her To Marge Simpson Didn’t Go Well

Kamala Harris has only been Joe Biden’s running mate for a day now, and while the news was well-received by some, like her SNL portrayer Maya Rudolph, many on the right were quick to dogpile on the possible future veep. Even a lesser known Trump Team staffer tried to get in on it. Jenna Ellis — senior legal adviser to the president’s re-election campaign and one of his attorneys — took to Twitter with what she thought was a nasty dig.

“Kamala sounds like Marge Simpson,” Ellis wrote. Thing is, if she thought comparing Harris to the tall-haired matriarch of the longest-running animated show in history was an insult, Twitter was there to remind her that she was deeply mistaken. Some people were baffled.

Others were angry.

After all, Marge is nothing if not the conscience of Springfield, in whichever state Springfield is in.

Besides, she’s capable of deep, profound, heartbreaking sadness.

Then again, Marge Simpson also gets stuff done.

And she cleans up after the lazy guy.

And she gave birth to Lisa Simpson, the president who, long before he was actually our real president, succeeded — and cleaned up — after Ellis’ boss.

Marge also “wrote” a stern but polite letter to a real previous president, George H.W. Bush, after he criticized the show. Bush, whose skin was thicker than the current one’s, wrote back.

In short, comparing anyone to Marge Simpson is the opposite of an insult.

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The Weeknd Donates $300,000 To Help Victims Of The Beirut Explosion

On August 4, the port city of Beirut in Lebanon suffered a pair of devasting explosions, the latter of which has been labeled as one of the most powerful non-nuclear explosions in history. In the end, at least 220 were killed, 7,000 injured, 300,000 were left homeless, and a total of $10-15 billion worth of property was damaged. As the country looks to rebuild and heal, a process that has become much more difficult thanks to the resignation of many government leaders, including the prime minister, The Weeknd offers his contribution to victims in the relief process.

In an announcement made by The Weeknd’s manager, Wassim “Sal” Slaiby, whose wife Rima Fakih has been working with relief efforts for Lebanon, he revealed that The Weeknd made a donation of $300,000 to Global Aid for Lebanon to aid with relief efforts. “I am so honored and humbled to work with artist’s who have such deep care for the world and right now for our brothers & sisters of Lebanon who are in pain and need our collective help,” Slaiby wrote in his statement. “I want to thank my brother @theweeknd for his generous and class act of donating $300,000 to the Global Aid for Lebanon campaign.”

The Weeknd’s donation is just his latest in recent contributions for a better cause. At the end of June, the singer donated $1 million to pandemic relief with half a million going to Scarborough Health Network (SHN) and the other half a million going to MusiCares.

Check out Slaiby’s Instagram post about The Weeknd’s donation above.

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Ask A Music Critic: Which Artist’s ‘Biggest’ Song Is Also Their Best?

Welcome to another installment of Ask A Music Critic! And thanks to everyone who has sent me questions. Please keep them coming at [email protected].

When debating bands and artists, we often consider the totality of their catalogs and careers to form our opinions and arguments. But what would happen if we would judge a band or artist solely based on their biggest hit? Excluding one-hit wonders, which bands and artists’ reputations would be hit the hardest? Conversely, who would benefit the most? For example, The Beatles are the consensus “Greatest Band of All Time,” but what if we could only evaluate them based on “Yesterday”? Led Zeppelin with “Stairway to Heaven”? Prince with “When Doves Cry”? Whitney Houston with “I Will Always Love You”? Radiohead with “Creep”? Pearl Jam with “Last Kiss”? While this isn’t a fair system for judging great artists, I do think it’s interesting to consider whose reputation would take the biggest hit and whose reputation would be over-inflated. — Matthew from Montclair, N.J.

As you admit, this is a highly questionable method for assessing artistic greatness. However, I happen to be a fan of questionable methods for assessing artistic greatness, so let’s get into this!

It should go without saying that the biggest song by a particular artist is rarely the best song. But it’s amazing how wide that gap between biggest and best is for some artists. For instance, Frank Ocean was possibly the most acclaimed artist of the 2010s. He is properly celebrated for landmark albums like Channel Orange and Blonde, but the highest-charting track that Frank Ocean appeared on is “Slide,” a hit for Calvin Harris. Kendrick Lamar is a similar case — in this paradigm, the man who made classics like To Pimp A Butterfly and Good Kid, M.A.A.D. City would be judged by his cameo in Taylor Swift’s “Bad Blood,” just as Bon Iver would be assessed on the strength of Swift’s recent hit, “Exile.”

As for acts that would benefit from this, the group that comes immediately to mind is The New Radicals. (I know you said no one-hit wonders but it’s next to impossible to find over-inflated examples if you don’t look at one-and-done acts.) If you were to judge this band solely on the basis of their only hit, 1998’s “You Get What You Give,” they would be, perhaps, the greatest indie-pop group of the ’90s.

And then there are artists who are considered iconic based on their catalogues … and would still be considered iconic if you only judged them on their biggest hit. If you only looked at “Like A Rolling Stone” when assessing Bob Dylan’s career, he comes out very well. Same with Queen and “Bohemian Rhapsody” — that song brilliantly summarizes everything that was unique and glorious about that band. As for Prince, did he ever make a better song than “When Doves Cry”? People will surely disagree — I’m a “Kiss” man myself — but being judged solely by that song is hardly an insult to the Purple One’s great legacy. I’d say the same thing about Whitney Houston and “I Will Always Love You” — she’s surely not diminished by having that as a signature song.

The point is, there are some artists who are so great that even when you judge them by an extremely flawed standard, they still come out looking like geniuses.

Why do people always scream joyously when artists curse on stage at shows? What makes hearing someone say “fuck” on stage feel more satisfying in a crowd setting? — James from Des Moines

Great question! I can’t believe you’ve actually made me nostalgic for having a performing artist scream obscenities in my face for the benefit of cheap applause. Just another thing to add to the “only in 2020” pile!

Upon reflection, I think there are three reasons why audiences respond so favorably to a well-placed “F-bomb” or “S-bomb” or “C-bomb” — there are multiple C-bombs! — at a show. Let’s explore each one of them.

1) Swearing is awesome

I could stop right here. Swearing is one of the best activities that an individual can pursue. It makes a person seem cool, confident, and admirable. Swearing not only makes everybody love you, but it also earns their respect. Fuck yeah.

2) Our Puritan roots

This country was built by severely repressed and deeply religious people, and while we have drifted far from those roots in the subsequent centuries, the belief that swearing is “naughty” remains deeply ingrained in our national psyche. At the same time, as we’ve already established, swearing is inarguably awesome. So, when we see a person swear in public, we feel a double shot of exhilaration because that person is doing something that is awesome AND defying social conventions, which is also awesome.

3) Swearing is a way to simulate spontaneity in an otherwise highly planned environment

Most concerts are performed by rote — the setlists don’t change, the lighting and staging are fixed, even the better-song patter is often scripted. It’s all part of the facade of a professional show-biz presentation. Swearing, however, is a way to break through that facade, if only for a moment — even when the swearing is part of the script. It’s the same reason why “hip” college professors swear in class. It’s a “shock” move meant to shake the audience of its stupor with a gesture that appears spontaneous and even — here’s that Puritan thing again — outside of what’s normally considered acceptable.

Does that make sense? I’m sorry, I mean: does that make fucking sense? Please, hold your applause, you’re embarrassing me!

Is there any important claim or argument that you have made in one of your books that you would go back and revise? And, as a corollary, as a writer how much to think about how your commentary will age as you’re writing it? — Kyler from Kansas City

This is a hard question, because my books — including my latest, This Isn’t Happening: Radiohead’s Kid A and The Beginning Of The 21st Century, due out next month and available now for pre-order! — are perfectly realized works that are utterly lacking in flaws.

I kid! The truth is that I never revisit my books because I’m afraid of what I’ll find there. It can be scary to put your thoughts down, lock them in, and then be forced to live with them for the rest of your life. I’m sure there are lots of things I’ve written that I would love to revise. But two things come immediately to mind: First, in Your Favorite Band Is Killing Me, I wrote about the rivalry between Michael Jackson and Prince. About a month before the book published, Prince died, which obviously changed the context for his life and career. I would’ve liked to revisit that chapter in light of Prince’s passing. I don’t think it would have dramatically changed my take on that rivalry, but I probably would’ve been more respectful of his output post-Diamonds And Pearls.

Second, in Twilight Of The Gods, I wrote some snarky things about John Mayer in the context of his tenure in Dead & Company. Since that time, I’ve gained a deeper appreciation for both Dead & Co. and Mayer’s solo catalogue. At some point, I’d like to do a deep dive into Mayer’s career, because I think he’s more interesting than he gets credit for. (I realize this might seem like a strange choice — why would I want to be nicer to John Mayer? But it’s honestly one of my main regrets about that book.)

For now, we’ll leave it at those two revisable opinions.

Jewel case or cardboard sleeve for CDs? — Brianna from Alexandria, Va.

Jewel case 4 life.

Some artists covered here are Warner Music artists. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.

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‘Arrival’ Meets ‘Alien’ In ‘Sputnik,’ A Moody New Alien Thriller From Russia

It’s 1983, and cosmonaut Konstantin Sergeyevich (Pyotr Fyodorov, Finest Hour) has just survived the rough re-entry that killed his partner, with one catch: he now has a freaky alien living in his esophagus. The alien, which looks sort of like an albino cobra crossed with a wolf spider covered in mucus (much like Senator Ted Cruz), escapes Konstantin’s body every night at 2 am to go carousing. As bad as that sounds, if the government functionaries in charge kill the alien, Konstantin, a national hero, might die himself (the ol’ Tony Stark corollary). Now the official in charge has brought in Tatyana Klimova (Oksana Akinshina), a young doctor known for her unorthodox methods. Will she be able to help?

That’s the premise for Sputnik, a utilitarian new sci-fi thriller out of Russia from commercial director Egor Abramenko. It was slated to debut at Tribeca before the pandemic, and has since been released online in its home country, where it became a modest hit-type thing on VOD. This week it gets an American release, courtesy of IFC.

Between the steely beauty (a “Russian Ripley,” per the press release) attempting to communicate with a mucusy, tentacled alien and a space traveler with kid issues (Konstantin has just found out about an estranged child), Sputnik borrows liberally from previous sources — Arrival, Alien, Gravity, that SNL sketch where Christopher Walken is trying to lure a badger out of Will Ferrell’s butt with a nice pot roast. Funny how every movie astronaut seems to have a dead, dying, or sick child that makes them want to leave Earth (see also: First Man). There’s even the requisite government official (Semiradov, played by Fedor Bondarchuk) who can only think of aliens in terms of geopolitics.

Obviously, what makes Sputnik fun to watch isn’t that it’s the first movie ever to cover this ground (though the Soviet setting is an interesting wrinkle). Egor Abramenko’s direction is tense and moody, and Sputnik‘s fx and production designers are clearly having fun, creating creature effects that all seem to ride that perfect line between gross and fascinating. Is there a word for that? The Dr. Pimple Popper effect? It’s like ASMR for people who enjoy bodily functions.

For an explanation of why Sputnik is a fun popcorn thriller (or at least a slightly smarter version of a popcorn thriller), we could essentially leave it at that — a testament to what well-staged scenes and exuberant production design can accomplish. It’s interesting to note, though, Tatyana’s commitment to the value of human life. It helps that the movie is set in 1983, because even in our movies since then we’ve been conditioned to accept higher casualties as the cost of progress (not to mention being encouraged, then and now, to believe that general disregard for human life was something ingrained in the Russian DNA). But much of Sputnik hangs on Tatyana’s steadfast refusal to throw bodies away, a mildly refreshing reversal when so many movies with aliens and geopolitics require simply yadda yadda-ing through collateral damage.

Sputnik has some loose ends, mostly dealing with Konstantin and Tatyana’s respective family drama, that it attempts to tie up in the third act, not altogether convincingly. It’s hard to give Sputnik much credit for larger philosophical ideas, which it mostly seems to toss in occasionally as a spice, so going for some heartwarming conclusion falls a little flat. Mostly, everything in it seems designed to build and maintain suspense that carries us from scene to scene, a task it more than accomplishes.

‘Sputnik’ hits select theaters and VOD August 14th. Vince Mancini is on Twitter. You can access his archive of reviews here.

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The United Kingdom Held Their First Socially-Distant Concert In Newcastle

In mid-March, various tours all across the country came to a screeching halt as the coronavirus put an end to almost all live music for the foreseeable future. Many artists have resorted to drive-in concerts as a way to still perform for fans. For some artists like Kehlani, it proved to be beneficial, while other artists’ attempts at social-distant shows, such as those put on by DaBaby, proved to be unsuccessful. But one put on across the pond in the United Kingdom came with a bit of a twist.

Taking to Newcastle’s Virgin Money Unity Arena, Sam Fender performed at the United Kingdom’s first socially-distant concert at an outdoor venue. Nearly a year removed from his Hypersonic Missles debut album, the English singer performed for 2,500 attendees, who watched from a total of 500 platforms that were two meters apart from each other. Each platform would hold no more than 5 people per platform, achieving their goal of a socially-distant night.

As the night went on, many fans shared their opinions on the new setup, with many saying that, considering the circumstances, the concert was a success. One fan labeled it as “the future! And least for the foreseeable…,” while another said it was “brilliantly organised.” Others weren’t big fans of the concert, one saying, “if that’s what the future is, count me out.” Whether or not this kind of setup becomes a regular thing remains to be seen, but if fans would like to get back to the outdoor concert, unorthodox approaches like this one may be necessary.

Kehlani is a Warner Music artist. Uproxx is an independent subsidiary of Warner Music Group.